Work Text:
Trump & Putin Dabble in Plastic Pleasure
“I think I’d like to invade Russia tonight. My force is going to be so big. It's going to be huge!”
“Tell me more my sweet American dick-tator.” Putin sensuously moaned as Donald nuzzled his grizzled Russian neck.
“I’ve got the EPA all locked up tight. None of their pro-climate whatchamagoo is getting out now. I think we should celebrate with a little...plastic pleasure.”
“Little you say?” Putin teased the orange toned, flabby sex monster.
“As small as a loan of a million dollars.”
“Oh Donnie, you spoil me!”
Putin tipped his head back. Baring his jugular to Trump’s dextrous tongue, after so many years spewing bullshit it was skilled in its crafty arts. Donald’s stubby hands cupped his Russian counterparts firm ass through his bear hide pants, kneading the tender flesh.
“I had this made from the remnants of America’s national parks.”
Donald withdrew a long plastic dildo out of his pants pocket. It was a bright and flashy orange, mirroring the jackolantern hue that Trump’s stylist modeled his look after. The bottom edge was encrusted with large diamonds. It was ribbed along the side with the infamous Trump logo.
“Would you like to experience some freedom tonight? We can make sex toys great again.” Donald whispered lavishly, licking and kissing his way down Putin’s chiseled abs.
Putin trailed his fingers through Donald’s three remaining locks of hair in ecstasy.
“Donald! I want you more than I ever wanted Ukraine!” Vlad responded wantonly.
Trump looked up at Putin lecherously.
“Imma grab that pussy.”
Fin.