Work Text:
Wally thought that he had gotten past the menial writing of inspirational feel good essays for summer homework in the third grade. It was a foolish thought. He was already in the seventh grade and he was clearly still writing them.
The assignment was painfully simple; a thin half sheet of paper with curt instructions:
Write a short, double spaced one page essay about someone in your life who fits the definition of a best friend. This person can be a family member or longtime pal. They can be a pet or a teacher, or anyone at all. Think about what it is that you like about them. What sorts of things do you do when you’re together? How did you meet them? Did you become friends quickly, or did you fight at first? Are they funny, or serious? Ask them what it is about you that they like. Address all of these questions in your essay and think about how having a best friend has influenced you and the way you act around and treat other people.
Wally knew exactly who he had to write about and he knew exactly what he was going to say, and the very best thing about having super speed was that Wally could write the whole essay in a flash (as Uncle Barry would say) and be done in plenty of time for his first out-of-city patrol that night.
Dusk was muting the blue sky outside Wally’s window when he sat down at his desk which was covered in so many loose papers that it almost looked like a poorly wrapped Christmas preset. Wally had to shove a good pile or two out of the way to make space for his laptop on the food stained pale wood. He sent Dick a text before he started and then got to work.
The essay was very nearly finished by the time Dick texted him back I think you’re lame and weird and I don’t like you.
My Best Friend Is Richard Grayson
It’s hard to believe, I know. I am best friends with the ward of the richest guy in Gotham city. Try not to treat me differently or give me A’s on all of my assignments now that you know. If you can’t help yourself though I understand.
I met Dick when my Uncle Barry took me on a road trip to Washington DC. He said that a friend of a friend knew Bruce Wayne and we stopped in Gotham and he gave us a tour of the city. Dick came with us and we both rode in the back of this really cool limo that their butler was driving. At first I thought Dick was a really mouthy rich kid who thought he was smarter than everybody else. Then we became friends and I found out Dick actually was a really mouthy rich kid who thought he was smarter than everybody else.
Dick is really funny and not serious at all. He plays pranks on Bruce and Alfred (their butler) a lot and when I visit him he plays them on me and I hate it. Sometimes we co-prank though, like this one time we replaced Alfred’s tapioca pudding with mayonnaise and horseradish and Bruce ate it and got really mad.
I texted Dick and asked him what he thought of me and he said that I was amazing and smart and the coolest person he has ever met and that if I was a girl he would have a huge fat gross crush on me. Dick likes me a lot.
One of the things that being friends with Dick has helped me to do is be more grateful for some of the stuff that I wasn’t grateful for before. I fight with my parents a lot and I used to wish I didn’t have them or I had different ones when I was little but Dick told me about his parents and how they died and he’s only ten but he’s really brave about it and stuff. So I try a lot harder to do what I’m told and not fight with my dad as much because of Dick.