Chapter Text
EPILOGUE
In the end, Dan was found guilty of too many offenses to even bother listing. His wealth wasn’t enough to save his ass this time around, and he was sentenced to spending the rest of his life in a nice, sunny location called Guantanamo Bay.
That’s a prison, by the way. It’s where the US sends particularly awful terrorists and the like.
A DNA test also coincidentally revealed he was the perpetrator of the Butt Cutter killings.
DHSI was shut down and the company’s assets were liquidated. As of September 2022, the DHSI building now houses several different businesses alongside still having numerous floors available for lease. Dan’s ill-begotten wealth—well, what was left over after the many, many lawsuits, which was still a shockingly high amount, ended up going to the US government to help pay off the National Debt.
And it actually brought the debt down to a more normal and manageable level. He had that much money.
The Cuyler family, on the other hand, was forgotten about by the media fairly quickly. As of the time of writing, Early’s grueling 2-year ordeal is only ever really discussed by true crime podcasts and certain YouTubers.
Which, quite honestly, is how they prefer things nowadays. Early in particular is still recovering mentally and physically from his experience in the lab. He continues to try and make amends with the locals for his past wrongdoings, and makes an honest living picking up trash from along the roadsides and bringing it in for recycling and/or disposal. His literacy is slowly improving.
The shack was rebuilt, this time with working heating and functional electricity. Lil ended up moving back into it after about a month of unsuccessfully trying to find an apartment. Currently she’s waiting for the state of Georgia to finally legalize marijuana, as she plans on starting a new, more modestly-sized weed farm in the backyard.
Rusty drives down to visit them from time to time. Occasionally he brings Tammi and Randy with him.
As for the rest of our cast?
Glen took his kids and moved out of state, all the way to North Dakota. He could not be reached for comment.
Agents Simmons and Gottfried returned to their normal duties—well, Simmons did at least. Gottfried is still currently going through Sensitivity Training regarding Interacting With Non-Human Sapients.
Frylock, Meatwad, and Master Shake were last heard from in Toledo, Ohio back in May. Their current whereabouts are unknown.
O1-57 keeps herself busy watching out for people speeding on the highway.
Sheriff and Denny have found that the crime rate in Dougal County dropped by 80% after January 2022. It continues to stay at a very low level.
However, this certainly doesn’t mean that their lives have been uneventful since then. Quite the contrary, in fact. Sure, that certainly seemed to have been the case, that is, until the month of June rolled around. One day around the beginning of summer, he decided to run a DNA sample from a long-unidentified murder victim through CODIS, simply to see what would happen.
What Sheriff discovered that day would reopen an investigation into a series of crimes that dated back to before he was even born, and reveal family secrets that otherwise would’ve stayed buried forever.
But that story will have to wait for the sequel.
All I can say is that I hope you guys like late-60s music.