Chapter Text
Intro, Dorcas: March, 1976
If there was one thing Dorcas knew about Marlene McKinnon, it was that she was a bitch.
She took Quidditch seriously, but always had this aloof expression when she was playing, like she couldn't care less about it. It was annoying, because how can she be so good, how can she practice so dilligently yet seem like she wants nothing to do with it?
And in Potions, she was a right idiot. She slept during most classes and whenever Professor Slughorn would call on her, she just didn't know the answer. Dorcas isn't sure she's even ever seen Marlene ever get anything correct.
Of course Professor Slughorn had to do Dorcas the disservice and pair her together with McKinnon. Their names are right next to each other alphabetically, and Dorcas has been dreading this moment since last year when she first noticed McKinnon's stupidity and the fact that their surnames are rather similar. Although she'd been hoping this day would never come, it inevitably does.
McKinnon slides into the seat next to her, a grim smile on her face that says, "hey, I don't want to be doing this either". While Dorcas isn't friends (or even acquaintances) with any Slytherin that isn't a sixth year, she knows that McKinnon has plenty of friendships in this class. There's the annoying four boys known as the Marauders, which house Sirius Black, Reggie's older brother. Then there's those Muggleborns that everyone seems to like - the redhead and the brunette. Dorcas has always found the both of them annoying as well. The brunette never shuts up, and can often be found snogging some boyfriend of hers in the Quidditch closets or in some corner where she thinks no one can see her. The redhead is just a know it all.
As Professor Slughorn explains the instructions, Dorcas props open her book - a raggedy old thing that once belonged to her father that her mother insisted she bring with her, instead of purchasing a new one from a bookstore. She glances over at Marlene, wondering if the Gryffindor has noticed the contrast between their copies. She hasn't.
When the professor finishes, Dorcas scans the page they're supposed to be on. It's a relatively simple potion. The only trouble is that it takes an entire month to brew, and you have to continuously add ingredients every single day. Seeing as they don't even have this class every day... Dorcas will unfortunately have to see McKinnon during her free time.
Dorcas looks over at the blonde, who is leaning back in her chair and tossing a coin up in the air, then catching it. It's a mindless task, and Dorcas assumes McKinnon is only doing it to either be annoying or to show that she's not interested in completing the work. Shocker, that.
"Are you going to help me or not?" Dorcas huffs, shoving the book in Marlene's direction. The Gryffindor hasn't even opened hers.
Marlene peers down at the text, her eyes just skimming the page. "Yeah. What are we doing?"
Dorcas sighs. She shouldn't have expected anything more from this poor excuse for a student. "Just crush these and add them into the cauldron when you're done."
"That's it?" Marlene raises an eyebrow.
"Yes?"
"Well-"
"I was under the impression that was all you're capable of, McKinnon," Dorcas sneers.
Marlene's eyes are wide, like she wasn't expecting that. "You think I'm daft, or something?"
Dorcas chuckles, beginning to measure out the proper amount of dragon's blood for the potion. "I think you are not only daft, but lazy; and I doubt that you have the will to complete this to the best of your abilities. It appears, McKinnon, that nothing is important to you. Not even Quidditch."
Marlene scoffs. "Quidditch matters to me more than anything else. And I can be good at academics when I try. I'm just not a fan of potions," she grumbles, crushing the bugs like she's irked with them, too.
"Was it not clear that I think you could be good, you just don't want to?" Dorcas feigns innocence, glancing over at Marlene with a blank expression. Marlene glares back. "Perhaps if you strained that single braincell of yours, you could actually impress someone. Although the bar must be rather low for you."
This time, Marlene lets out a short laugh of disbelief. "You're quite fond of insults, aren't you?"
Dorcas shrugs. "I'm quite fond of honesty."
Marlene shakes her head, then looks back up. "You know, if we're going to be partners for a whole month, you might as well try to be friendly with me."
"I don't do the whole 'friends' thing," Dorcas replies plainly. "Especially not with people like you."
Marlene frowns. "People like me? What, Gryffindors? Half-bloods?" A small smile creeps onto her face. "Blondes?"
"Yes, McKinnon. The latter," Dorcas deadpans. When Marlene just shrugs instead of responding to that, Dorcas rolls her eyes and goes on to say, "people that simply cruise by school instead of giving it their all."
"I know that you're intelligent, Meadowes," Marlene replies. Dorcas notices this is the first time she's heard her name of McKinnon's lips. "You could probably afford to lay back every so often too."
Dorcas slightly grimaces. "No, I couldn't."
Their conversation takes a pause, the both of them silent for a short while.
Marlene can't seem to hold her tongue, however. "We've never actually talked before, if you haven't noticed. You seem to have made up your mind about me, all these outlandish opinions, without even trying to get to know me. Why's that?"
"Because it's clear that you're a fool. I don't need a conversation to tell me that."
"But why do you think I'm a fool, Meadowes?" Marlene asks, and Dorcas feels compelled to look at her. Marlene has pretty eyes. They're blue, but it's not necessarily the color that pulls Dorcas in. It's the lilt they have to them, the warmth that they hold. The way that Marlene draws on her black line of eyeliner, and how she puts on Muggle mascara to lengthen her eyelashes.
"I..." Dorcas begins, but can't quite find the words. She purses her lips, and looks away. "You never pay attention in class. I always see you sleeping or barely writing notes and whenever we have to do things with a partner or a group, your friends are always doing all the work for you. Not to mention, on the field you're completely aloof."
Marlene snorts. "You're attentive, Meadowes."
"When someone is simply so dumb, it's hard not to notice."
"Want to know what I notice about you?" Marlene asks, her voice quieter, softer.
Dorcas shouldn't want to, but she does. "Yes."
"I notice that you always have a couple colored strands in your braids," Marlene murmurs, reaching a hand out to run her fingers through them. Her hand ever so slightly falls on Dorcas' back, and the brush of fingers against Dorcas' spine makes it shiver. "But I like your natural hair too. And you always have painted nails, the color of whatever's in your hair at the time. You have this expression," she chuckles, "whenever you're focusing really intensely - it's hilarious. And you have nice eyebrows. They twist up when Professor Slughorn is explaining something that hardly makes any sense at all."
Dorcas realizes, when Marlene finishes speaking, that her eyes are wide open, and her jaw is slack.
"Oh, and I like your rings," Marlene says, gesturing to them.
Dorcas has forgotten she wears them, and she is suddenly very aware of her hands, and how close they are to McKinnon. "Thanks," is all she has the heart to reply with.
Marlene just smiles. She looks like a puppy, like the golden retriever Dorcas' neighbours have. "You're welcome."
Maybe, just maybe, McKinnon is not as bad as Dorcas thought.
---
Lily: December, 1977
As it nears closer to the Winter Holidays, which means closer to mid-year exams, the entire group of Gryffindors are all tired and bored out of their minds from the endless studying. Lily doesn't mind much. Studying is peaceful for her, the thing that she can always count on. When things are unpredictable, exams will always be the same. Study like hell, take the test, get your hopefully good results. Not to mention this year is NEWTS, which she's been madly preparing for. Some people (not to name names, but Sirius, James, Mary...) haven't seemed to care much. She doesn't know if she's ever seen Sirius studying, and sitting around and bothering Remus while he studies does not count.
Everyone is constantly complaining, however, and it's starting to really get on her nerves.
"Lily, can you please help me with this essay?" Said Peter a couple days ago, when she was hobbled away in a corner in the library, just reading some text alone. Lily likes being able to help people, and study with others around her, but she prefers her solitude. Surrounded by her own thoughts, she's able to write better. Unless it's Remus, but the two of them practically share a brain when it comes to academia.
She tried to look up with a pleasant expression, but perhaps it didn't come across as inviting. Peter's eyes widened and he took a step back. "I'll, uh, come back when it's a better time?"
He ran away.
Then Marlene came asking her if she could "just give me the answers for that assignment, I promise I'll repay you somehow". Lily wasn't sure what Marlene could do that would repay her. Maybe do her makeup? Marlene was exceptional at that, and Lily could barely even put on lipstick.
Of course there was Sirius, who particularly liked to bug her when Remus had already sent him off. "Lily, please!" He'd whine. "Remus already told me no and you're my last resort! You've got to help me out just this once, please!"
The thing was, it never was just this once.
Anyways, part of the strangeness of this season was experiencing it with James as not her friend or as her enemy, as he had been in the past. Now he was her lover, she supposed. Her interestingly distant, reserved lover.
"James, you alright?" She asked him that nearly twice a day now.
He was always staring off into the distance, like he was pondering the deepest questions of life. She wondered if he had secretly become a philosopher.
"Yeah, I'm ace," he'd say quietly, and go back to looking like Aristotle.
Lily wasn't sure what to make of her relationship with James now. She wasn't that sure what to make of any of her relationships. She keeps feeling like Marlene is hiding something for her, always sneaking off way more than she used to. And whenever Lily would ask what she was doing, the answer was always "hanging with some friends". It's unlike any of them to lie about what they were doing, or not tell the full truth. What friends? Didn't they all have the same friends?
She and Mary seem alright now, and whatever confusion there had been from whatever happened in that cupboard seems to have disappeared. She still isn't sure what Mary was insinuating. Lily didn't know how much more honest she could've been, but maybe Mary was right? Maybe she is scared. Maybe she isn't sure of how she feels about James.
It's almost, in a weird way, like she and James have gone back to just being friends. They kiss still, but not very much. Lily's never been a fan of public displays of affection, and she's not going to start now. The most they do is hold hands.
She's tried explaining this to Remus, but it seems he has no concept of what being in anything but a lovey-dovery perfect beautiful relationship. He and Sirius are so enthralled with one another, it's amusing. The way they look at each other isn't much different from how they did before they admitted their feelings to each other, but now they're not stealing them, now she sees them boldly staring. Now she sees them being honest about the love they have for each other, and it's a sweet thing.
"I'm so terribly jealous of the two of you," she's lamented to Remus before.
He had laughed at her. "Why? You and James are the epitome of a fantastical romance. Straight out of a novel, really."
"I guess," she says. There are aspects of them that make her blush with pure joy, knowing how the two of them turned out, knowing how happy she was when they became Lily and James. "But it doesn't feel much like that now."
"Isn't that what happens in relationships? After a while it starts settling and that giddyness kind of dies down?" Remus suggests.
"It certainly hasn't for you," she scoffs.
The red on Remus' cheeks is comical. "Well, that's different!"
Lily laughs at his indignant tone. "Sure it is."
"I'll see how I feel about Sirius in a couple of months," Remus shrugs.
"I don't think you could ever feel less than absolutely obsessed with him," Lily sighs. "You've been this way for years. It never went away for you."
"That's true," he says.
"I just think I might not be capable of feeling deep emotions for James, you know?" Lily muses. "I've been in love before. I've felt that raw cut that you have when you love someone. I've had those nights where I just can't sleep because the amount of feeling that consumes my being, and I just don't have that with James."
"Poet," Remus mutters. Lily shoots him a glare. "Sorry. That's... interesting." He pauses. She feels the question coming. "Are you talking about Mary?"
Lily instantly groans. "Yeah," she whispers.
"Lily," he frowns.
"Remus."
"Are we back on her?"
"I don't think we are!" Lily throws her hands up in despair. "But she's with Emmeline now, and she keeps telling me that it's not a romantic thing with them, but then what the fuck is it? I don't understand! And she told me to admit my feelings, and that I can't because I'm scared?"
"Hmm."
"I feel like she's onto me, like she knows that I'm not alright with James and that I don't like him as much as I should and I don't know what's wrong with me because shouldn't I? This is everything a person could want! I have someone who wants me for me and who really likes me and someone I thought I really liked but now nothing feels right and nothing makes it feel right and I constantly feel like I'm doing something wrong!"
Remus takes a while to respond to that. She can see him mulling it over in his head, pursing his lips like he always does when he's really contemplating the right words to say.
"Are you sure it's not because... James is a boy?"
Lily's mouth goes dry. "What?"
"Like, maybe you just can't feel that way about boys. Maybe you can only feel that way about girls?"
"Do you think I'm a lesbian?"
"Well, I don't know! It's what it's sounding like!"
"Oh, fuck," Lily moans. "I don't even want to think about that."
"Alright, let's not then."
"I think it'll be fine. Maybe you're right. Maybe it's like I'm out of the honeymoon phase and I just have to get used to what being in a normal relationship is like."
"Sure."
"Maybe I should talk to James about this?"
"Maybe."
"But do you think he'll be upset? Like, do you think he feels the same way. He's been so distant."
"Yeah, you told me that."
"I don't want to hurt him."
"Of course not."
"But, you know. I want to be honest. I'd feel horrible not being honest. But I'd feel horrible being honest and hurting his feelings. There really isn't a good route to take, is there?"
"Relationships are difficult."
"Definitely."
---
James: December, 1977
"Alright boys. It's our last December. Our last chance we have in 1977 to make an impact. To really strike!" James says, pacing around the room like a mastermind, his hands placed together like he's plotting (which he is, of course). "We've gone all out every Christmas in the past, but this year we need to think even bigger. We're seventh years! We have control of the school. I'm Head Boy for Merlin's sakes. We're all Animagi." Remus clears his throat. "Sorry. 'Cept for you, Moony." Remus nods. "I won't lie, it's feel like we've pulled out every trick in the book at this point. I mean, our fifth year jello juice? A hit. Second year when we turned the staircase into invisible ice? Absolutely wonderous. Still have no clue how we managed to do that at the ripe age of twelve. Not to mention last year when we sent Filch to the Great Lake and the entire school watched? And everyone clapped, including the Slytherins?" Sirius nods, pridefully. "We've wowed everyone before. We've made a name for ourselves in these past years, mates, and that is exactly why we have to cross boundaries, take it to another level, do the impossible!"
"What, exactly, is the impossible?" Peter sqeaks.
James points at him dramatically. "That, my friend, would be... the impossible." James sighs. "Impossibly hard to come up with, too."
"What if we charmed all the Slytherins so they could only compliment Gryffindors?" Sirius suggests, his eyes hopeful.
James groans. "We've already done that!"
Peter frowns, and then says, "what if we set pixies loose in the dungeons?"
"We did that in third year, Pete!" James laments. "Besides, I don't think it should be Slytherin targeted. That was childish stuff, rubbish we did back in our early days. We're established now. We're world-class pranksters! We can't just focus our efforts on a small group, we have to attack everyone!"
James called this Marauder Meeting (yes, it has a formal title) this afternoon because he was desperate to conjure up a plan for a grand prank; a bigger one than they've ever done before. He needed something to take his mind off recent events, and pranking has been his escape ever since he was a young boy. Unfortunately, he can't think of a single thing they haven't done before. Being a Marauder has its joys, but the sad thing about being extremely popular pranksters is that when you go out, you have to go big. Everyone expects big.
They haven't really been able to brainstorm anything yet this whole year. Every single time someone suggested doing a prank, they opted for a party instead. James would try to reassure the group by saying that pranks were for children, and they were adults now. Adults partied and drank and danced! Pranks are things of the past! But that doesn't quite work on them anymore. The Marauders are misfits, desperate to get up to some mischief, for scheming!
Sirius clears his throat. "What if... we comitted arson?"
"Sirius!" Remus cries instantly.
"Erm..." Peter mutters.
"Absolutely not." James sighs.
Sirius raises his hands defensively. "Listen, I suggest this every time. You knew it was coming. And we seem to be running out of options, so... Who's with me?"
None of the other boys raised their hands. Sirius pouts, and then leans back against his headboard. Remus ruffles his hair affectionately. James is painfully jealous of the two of them, but right now he can't afford to think about that.
Oh, that. It's been plaguing his mind ever since it happened, and although James takes every opportunity he can to distract himself, nothing is ever enough to truly remove the memories from his head. Regulus' face flashes across his mind constantly. His voice, his touch, his scent. James is utterly obsessed with it all, and nothing releases him from the torment of it.
Great. Now he's really thinking about that.
"Potter, you alright?" Remus asks, his voice cutting through the silence.
James looks up, suddenly attentive. He's aware he must look like a deer caught in headlights now. "Yeah. Just... worried about this prank."
"S'all you ever think about, mate?" Sirius laughs.
If only he knew.
"As if your mind wasn't always on mischief before you became obsessed with Lupin here," James scoffs, finally sitting down on his own bed.
The old Sirius would've snarled, muttered some crude retort. The new one just blushes a bit, a bashful smile encompassing his face, and says softly, "I've always been obsessed with Lupin."
Remus blushes too. It's a sweet, yet horrific, scene.
"Enough, you two," Peter finally says. If anyone's good at interfering with Sirius and Remus' flirting, it's Pete. "What if... instead of pulling a prank, we gave a performance?"
Sirius' eyes immediately lit up. "A performance! You're genius, Wormtail! How did I not think of that?"
"You're too busy thinking about someone else," James huffs to himself. No one else hears.
"What kind of performance, might I ask?" Remus says drily, continuing to play with Sirius' locks.
His fingers are interrupted when Sirius jumps up from the bed dramatically, in his most illustrious Sirius fashion. "A performance that wows them all. A performance better than David Bowie himself could have ever put on! A performance like no other!"
"I'm still uncertain what exactly we'd be performing," Remus deadpans.
Sirius grins. "We have unlimited options, boys. Do we perform music? Do we pull a prank in itself by acting out a dramatic scene? Do we create a play, and enlist the girls to help us out? Do we stage a duel?"
"These are all very interesting," Peter says.
Remus nods. "None of us can play music, unfortunately. And none of us can act."
Sirius gasps. "Whatever do you mean? I'm twice as good at acting as all of you!"
"Two multiplied by zero is still zero," Remus shrugs.
Sirius fakes offense.
"You'd never be good at acting when it comes to Remus," James crosses his arms. "You'd probably break down crying by just pretending to duel him."
Sirius shrugged, acceptingly. "True." He pauses, then says, "there's still a ton of things we could do, though. I mean, I've always wanted to learn an instrument."
"Don't you know the piano?" Peter asks.
Sirius shoots him a glare. "I would prefer to not have to use that skill of mine."
James comprehends instantly what Sirius is referring to. The reason.
"What about the guitar, love?" Remus suggests. James can see Sirius melt when Remus uses that pet name. "Or the drums?"
Sirius eyes light up again. "The drums! I've found my calling! Potter, tell Monty to send a drumset as soon as he can! I'm going to find my inner Roger Taylor! My John Bonham! Better yet, my Keith Moon!"
James isn't sure who any of those people are. He doesn't know much about the Muggle rock bands that Sirius and Remus love so much. He likes music, and he loves it when they're played at parties or in the dorm room, but it's not something he cares about on his own. But they're associated with Padfoot and Moony, which means they're amazing.
Still, he's done his fair share of singing in the shower and pretending to play a guitar or a keyboard at Gryffindor parties. Lily never was quite wooed by his attempts at being a musician, though he supposes none of that matters now. He wonders, briefly, if Regulus would be attracted to that sort of thing. James has a feeling he'd pretend to hate it, but on the inside he'd be falling head over heels. At least, that's what James hopes the case would be.
The thought of Regulus enjoying a concert with James as the singer sends butterflies in his stomach, and James finds himself saying, "can I sing?"
The three of them look a bit stunned at first. "You, Potter? You sing?"
James blushes, looking away sheepishly for a moment. "You've never heard me?"
"Only when you're drunk or trying to get Lily's attention," Remus says.
"Or both," Pete shrugs.
"Well, I think I could be an amazing singer, if I tried."
"Then you'll be our singer, Potter. Our main man. Our lead," Sirius grins.
"And you, Remus?" James asks.
Remus' face is comically blank. "I'll try the bass."
Sirius shouts in delight.
"Peter? Electric? Acoustic? Any guitar, please?"
"I'm not opposed," Peter says while sporting a small smile.
Sirius and James end up screaming and jumping together like a bunch of idiots. Eventually, Peter and Remus join in.
When they fall apart, James sighs. "Where are we going to fit all of this stuff?"
"We'll find a place," Sirius shrugs.
"You've got your Head Boy dorm, don't you?" Peter suggests. "We can always practice there?"
"You do realize we've got about a week to each learn an instrument, right?" Remus says. "'Cept for you, Potter."
James smiles.
"Nothing's impossible, dearest Moony," Sirius says, his puppy-dog eyes increasing by the second. Remus looks absolutely enthralled by him. James, sadly, wants to kill them out of sheer jealousy.
"For you, Padfoot," Remus rolls his eyes.
They lean in for a kiss. James and Peter both groan in disgust.
"Fuck off, you two," Sirius glares at them when he pulls away.
James snorts. "Public decency, Pads."
"Oh, I'll show you public decency!" Sirius yells, and the night ends in a monumental pillow fight that lasts ages.
---
Mary: December, 1977
Mary's done ignoring it.
She likes Lily Evans.
A lot.
It's maddening how she didn't see before. How the feelings weren't entirely obvious from the very beginning. Lily's just beautiful. Everything about her is. Not even just her looks, but the way that she talks, the way that she laughs, the things that she says, even the way that she cries. God, she looks pretty when she cries.
Mary can't stop thinking about it. It's actually quite embarrassing and pathetic how intense she's fallen for the redhead. Her days are now spent solely dreaming about what it would be like to kiss those soft, pink lips. What it would be like to wake up beside Lily and roll over and just kiss her. Snogging at a party. Snogging everywhere.
So, Mary really wants to kiss her.
If it weren't for James, Mary is almost sure she would've done it by now. She's the sort of girl that can blame anything on being drunk, even her dumbest mistakes. A little drop of beer, and maybe stealing some liquid luck from Sluggy, and she would've been on her way to snog Lily Evans. But no, James Potter is there to ruin everything. It's a damn shame Mary is a good friend, but how could she not be?
The strangest thing is, now that understands her anger, she can't really be mad anymore. It's not James' fault she's in love with Evans. He just happens to be there. The most Mary can do is be annoyed at him when Lily's annoyed at him, but she never is, because the man is practically perfect! She almost wishes he were a total bastard like Snape so that Lily could move on from him already, but she's still always with him. Or maybe that's just their Head Boy and Girl duties. Mary isn't sure. She might just be delusional.
The impossible thing is is that there's no one she can really talk to about it. Well, she supposes she could always tell Marlene. Marlene would understand, and she's one of the most loyal people you'll ever meet. Marlene wouldn't tell a secret if her life depended on it, but still. Mary can't help but feel awkward sharing her passions for her best friend with her other best friend.
There is another best friend, however... but it may just be worse.
It can't hurt to try, can it?
That's how Mary ends up sitting in the Head Boy dormitory with Sirius Black, who is currently tapping away at his new drumset which arrived yesterday. He wouldn't stop talking about it at breakfast, and when Mary asked if they could spend some time together and talk, he immediately told her "I'll be busy with my drums". They came to an agreement that Sirius would practice (as quietly as he could) and Mary would talk.
She sighs, letting her head soften on the bed's pillow. James never uses this room to sleep in - although she wouldn't be shocked if he and Lily snuck up here once. It's disgusting to think about that, for multiple reasons, so Mary shoos the thought from her head.
"Let me guess," Sirius says, beginning to twirl his drumstick between his fingers. Mary has the urge to ogle at it, but won't let herself. Sirius doesn't deserve to know she thinks he's cool. "This is about Lily?"
Mary groans. "How did you know?"
Sirius laughs. "It's painfully obvious, my dear. You're obsessed with her." She glares at him. "What? Don't be hateful because I'm right! Anyway, you two have a certain kind of chemistry. I always sensed this coming from you."
It's pathetic the way Mary blushes at the use of the word 'chemistry'. She's almost certain Sirius picked that term up from Remus - she's never heard another wizard describe romance like that. She's never heard of another wizard even knowing what chemistry is in general...
"So, talk," Sirius presses. "I'm all ears."
"All ears on your drumset," Mary mutters. She gets a response from a drumstick thrown at her head. Sirius accios it back at him.
She sighs, and then says, "I don't know what to do, Sirius. It's hopeless, isn't it? She's so overjoyed with James."
Sirius shrugs. "I dunno, mate. He doesn't seem so sure about the two of them. Honestly, have they even spent time together outside of rounds?"
Mary has tried her best not to think about how much time Lily spends with James now, and although she thought she wasn't doing a very good job at it, she can't remember the last time Lily snuck out at night to spend it with Potter. "Erm..."
"And James is tucked away in his own bed every night. I doubt the Head Girl dorm has been used," Sirius nods over to it. The dorm is just down the hall.
"I thought something seemed off with the two of them, but maybe it was just academic stress? Or Quidditch, you know?" Mary wonders. "I mean, how could there ever possibly be problems with Lily and James? They're the picture perfect couple."
Her mind wanders off to the argument she and Lily had in that coupboard. She had been warned not to assume Evans and Potter had the best relationship, but she thought it to be mostly insecurities. They surely seemed alright.
"Don't always judge a book by its cover, MacDonald," Sirius grins.
She tosses a pillow at him. It hits the cymbol, sending a sharp noise through the room. Sirius glares at her. "What's it with you and the Muggle idioms today?"
"Just feeling particularly Muggle," Sirius shrugs. "That, and I've been studying plenty for Muggle Studies this week."
"You, Sirius Black, studying?" Mary gasps, faking shock. His face of displeasure doesn't dissolve. "And Muggle Studies, at that?"
"Hey! I've always liked Muggle Studies," Sirius grumbles. "And I can be good at studying when I want to be."
"Shame it isn't when Lily wants you to be," Mary laughs. "You need to stop pestering her."
"Oh, I bet you'd want me to stop pestering her," Sirius crosses his arms.
"If I acted that way around Remus, you'd want me to stop, wouldn't you?" Mary teases. Sirius' face flushes. It seems to do that every time his adoration for Remus is mentioned.
"We're meant to be talking about you, MacDonald. Stop trying to change the topic," Sirius snaps at her, and Mary laughs in response.
"Is this not strange to you?" Mary wonders aloud, picking at the dirt beneath her nails. "We're exes talking about my crush on your best friend's girlfriend. I mean, this conversation should not be happening."
"But it is, isn't it?" Sirius grins. Mary's favorite grin of his is this one. Sirius has several, for many different ocassions, but this one is his best. He smirks, his eyes looking dark and mischievious. Like he's about to set something on fire. "Everything about me is strange, love. Get used to it."
"Trust me, I have," Mary says, her back falling onto the bed. "Took me a while, but I have."
Sirius hums something to himself, softly tapping the kick with his foot.
"You're writing the song, then?"
"Oh, we're doing a cover," Sirius says, playing around with the sounds a bit more.
"Then what's this? A little something for Remus?"
Sirius chuckles, and Mary can see the scarlet on his cheeks again. "Maybe. I've got to let my musical genius out somewhere. And now I've got this drumset to help me!"
"Can't you play the piano?" Mary asks.
"Next is the electric guitar, I suppose. Remus is all about the bass, though. I won't steal that from him."
"It does suit him," she nods. "What, are the four of you a band now?"
"We're pranksters at heart," Sirius says, twirling the drumstick again, "but it doesn't hurt to venture into new territories sometimes. It'd be a disservice to the world if I didn't experiment with music. A waste of my talents, don't you think?"
Mary rolls her eyes.
"And music is very liberating. I have so many thoughts about Remus all the time, you know? When I'm able to write something, I'm able to put those feelings out. He writes poetry about me, but he never lets me read it. Maybe I'll write songs about him, and I'll never let him hear them."
"Wouldn't that be a disservice to him, then?"
Sirius shrugs. "So maybe I will let him hear them. I don't know. I just know that he's my muse."
Mary sighs. "That's so beautiful. I hate you both."
Sirius barks a laugh. "You could try it with Lily."
"I'm not very musical, and besides, it's pathetic when your love is unrequited. I'd just sound like a loser," Mary laments.
"And if there's one thing Mary MacDonald is not, it's a loser," Sirius says.
Mary chuckles. "Of course." She stands up, sauntering towards the door. "I'll leave you to your music, Sirius."
He looks up at her, a softer smile on his face now. "You sure? I don't mind talking more."
"I don't have many words to say. Think I need to think about them," Mary says. It's a lie. She thinks about them enough to tell the entire world about them, but it's hard to actually tell people. And she's tired. And nobody, not even Sirius Black, is allowed to see the truly personal side of Mary MacDonald.
"If you ever want to be senseless, I'm here," he says, and Mary smiles at him, then closes the door behind her. She can hear the sound of drums going wild as she walks down the hallway and towards the Gryffindor tower.
---
Outro, Lily: December, 1977
That night, Lily dreams.
To be honest, it didn't feel much like a dream when it was happening. It felt all very real.
Mary's hands were on her, but not like they normally were. Like they were in dreams Lily had years ago. Like how Lily wished they would be on her years ago.
Mary's smile was soft and her lips were too, and her hands were comforting as they held Lily's body. Her voice was like music, quietly being murmured into Lily's ear.
It was just the two of them, and no one else existed. Just the two of them in one of their bed's. Just that passion, just that love. Just them.
Lily awoke in a sweat.