Chapter Text
The rest of the family had fallen asleep ages ago but Neteyam was still staring at the ceiling, caught up in his own head. He was way behind in his training and it bothered him. If his family was going to be stuck here he had to improve his skills immensely, but so far every chance he had to prove himself ended with a mouthful of water.
He’d already lost his spot as successor to his father, being the Olo’ekytan. For his whole life that’s what he trained toward, and now, that spot was reserved for Aonung. Here, Aonung was the most skilled diver and hunter for his age in the whole Metkayina clan. Neteyam couldn’t compete.
It was almost a relief actually, no longer being the heir. It never was a guarantee that Neteyam would be the one to take over after his father, but as the eldest son of Toruk Makto it was expected of him to surpass the others. He had to be the strongest, or at least try the hardest in everything he did all the time. He was expected to be always dutiful, never acting out of self interest. It was exhausting.
Now, he didn’t have to worry about leading the tribe or being the strongest. He could relax, and breathe a guilty sigh of relief. If his father was no longer Toruk Makto, Neteyam no longer was expected to live up to him. The ocean clan didn’t expect him to amount to much of anything actually, because of his biological disadvantage. Aonung was now the one responsible for carrying all that pressure. Aonung was the one who had to surpass others' expectations of him, and be a role model for the clan. One day he’d take over as Olo’ekytan, arranged marriage and all.
That was another thing Neteyam used to worry about. Clan leaders mate’s were chosen with the future of the tribe in mind, meaning they were chosen for procreation as well as companionship. Neteyam however, had never had any crushes on the other female members of the omaticayan clan like Lo’ak or the other boys did. It worried him that something was probably wrong with him, and Ewya provided no answers. He felt he could never have a relationship like the one his parents had. Though he never mentioned it.
Luckily, he didn’t have to worry about that for now. Instead he stayed awake watching the shadows, feeling bad about being unhelpful.
He ought to be doing something. He could never reach Aonung’s skill level, he knew that. Aonung definitely knew that, but he could at least try to make himself useful.
He slowly sat up, gazing around at his family. They were all fast asleep. Neteyam made up his mind and snuck out of the Marui pod. He knew that rest was important, but he couldn’t shut his brain off. So if he couldn’t rest, he would train.
He headed down to the shore and walked along one of the rocks protruding from the side of the island. He didn’t dare try to ride an ilu with no one around. Especially not after last time, so he settled for breathing exercises instead. He took a seat on the rock and folded his legs. The stone had grown cold in the night. He shivered slightly.
Neteyam closed his eyes and breathed in slowly as possible. He exhaled, focusing on slowing his heartbeat. He drew in the air imagining Aonung's hand on his stomach.
His eyes flicked back open. No- that wasn’t helpful . His face heated up at the memory and his heartbeat returned to a faster pace.
He closed his eyes again, feeling strange. He breathed in, feeling the wind in the ears and listening to the waves on the shore.
You need to hold your breath and forget there even is a surface.
Aonung's words echoed in his mind. He tilted his head downward and imagined he was submerged. He was one with the water, and there was no sense of urgency about it.
He remembered Aonung's strong arms around his torso, carrying him to safety.
Neteyam groaned out in frustration, chucking a pebble off the ledge.
This was just perfect. That arrogant jerk had gotten into his head, and now Neteyam couldn’t focus. He didn’t know if it was because he felt intimidated by him, or jealous of him or what, but the feeling was getting really annoying.
“Lost your temper already?” A voice called from behind him.
Neteyam whipped his head around, startled.
“Aonung.” He stated, as if confirming it to himself.
“I told you, this takes patience. Getting frustrated with yourself won't help.” Aonung sat himself down beside Neteyam, facing the water.
“What are you doing up?” Neteyam asked.
“I could ask you the same thing.”
Aonung didn’t sound bothered by Neteyams presence, which caught him off guard. Not too long ago he’d been teasing him relentlessly but now, he was being quiet. Contemplative.
Neteyam thought for a moment wondering if he should lie. “Couldn’t sleep I guess.”
Aonung nodded. “Missing home?”
“Something like that.”
They sat in silence for a moment.
“Did… you want something?” Neteyam asked.
Aonung looked at him in confusion. “What?”
“We’ll I just mean, you’re being nice to me. You usually don’t do that.”
Aonung scoffed. “Who says I’m being nice? I’m just sitting here. Besides, I saved your life yesterday. If anything, that seemed pretty nice.”
Neteyam put his arms up as if surrendering. “Just wondering, that's all.”
Aonung made a “Tch.” type noise and looked away. “Why are you really awake?
Why do you care? Neteyam wondered.
“Thinking, I guess.” Said Neteyam, unsure. “My whole life is different now. I used to be the successor to the Olo’ekytan, and now, I’m not. I’m not… I’m not used to feeling so powerless.”
He sighed. “Kiri’s already miles ahead of me, and Lo’ak and Tuk are at least enjoying themselves. It’s like, the more I try, the more I keep messing up.” He admitted. “So I train.”
Aonung stared at him, surprised to hear the honest answer. He picked up a pebble and tossed it into the water. “You’re doing fine. You’ve hardly been training for a week. No need to be so dramatic.”
Neteyam turned to him, a bit surprised to hear words of reassurance from Aonung of all people. Maybe they both just needed someone to talk to. Otherwise they wouldn’t be awake.
“Ok, I'll bite. Why are you awake then?”
Aonung looked uncomfortable. “Just am.”
“That’s not a reason.”
Aonung looked down, and began fiddling with his necklace.
He exhaled hesitantly. “Back in the Omaticaya clan, where you lived, did you guys have arranged marriages?”
Oh.
Neteyam shrugged. “Typically the Olo’eyktan does, but that’s not how my parents met. I probably would’ve had one, had my family stayed.”
Aonung nodded.
Neteyam looked at him quizzically. “Your parents nagging you about it?"
Aonung nodded.
"But it’s not what you want?”
Aonung just sighed. “I don’t know what I want. My parents aren’t against the idea of me choosing my own partner, but there's really no one I'm interested in. Is that selfish? To not want a partner?”
Neteyam shook his head. “No, no of course not. I know how you feel, believe it or not.”
“You don’t want an arranged marriage either?”
“It wouldn’t be fair, is all.” Said Neteyam. To be with someone I couldn't love.
Aonung was unsure what Neteyam meant by that, but he didn’t question it. “What about the good of the clan?”
Neteyam rubbed the back of his neck. “The clan comes first. That’s how I was raised. It’s not selfish to want something different, but it’s selfish to act on it.”
Aonung nodded at his answer, his eyes a bit sad. After a moment, he snapped out of it, nudging Neteyam's arm. “You need to clear your head, tree boy.”
Neteyam looked back at him. “What?”
“To breathe. You need to clear your head.”
He rolled his eyes. “My name is Neteyam, actually.”
Aonung smirked at him. “I know. Now shut up.”
Neteyam closed his eyes passive aggressively and began breathing in slowly. He could hear Aonung breathing next to him. For a moment, the wind slowed down and it grew quiet. His tail swished behind him unconsciously, and brushed against Aonung.
Aonung perked up at that. He turned to Neteyam who was still focused on his breathing. He took note of the rise and fall of his chest. The glowing freckles on his skin. The soft blue tint on his lips. Aonung leaned forward, placing a hand on Neteyam's chest. Neteyam drew in a quick breath and opened his eyes. Aonung's eyes were downcast. Neteyam trembled with uncertainty under his touch and an uneasy, nervous feeling pooled in his gut. He blushed uncomfortably, brain too cloudy to wonder what Aonung was up to.
Staring into Neteyam's eyes, Aonung leaned in until they were inches apart. “You’re doing it wrong.” He whispered.
It took a second for his words to register. Neteyam blinked rapidly before shoving Aonung away from him.
“Quit teasing you… you… fish face!”
Aonung laughed at the terrible insult. Neteyam stood up. “And I didn’t ask for your help!” He stomped off, leaving Aonung alone on the rocks.
Neteyam was a strange boy, Aonung noticed. And he was very bad at breathing. His heartbeat was far too fast.