Chapter Text
“So, I never did get your name,” Cole starts, trying to put on a smile, even with the vengestone cuffs weighing down his wrists.
The student guarding him only stares at Cole, face impassive and still as a statue.
The clock ticks as they inspect each other.
Cole grimaces, “okay, I’ll just call you Chuck.”
Cole readjusts on the floor, sliding his legs out from under himself. He sighs, “look, Chuck. I know you’re Yang’s student, but I doubt your entire life revolves around this temple.” Cole glances back and winces as he remembers Chuck’s transparent form and current situation. “At least before Yang went power-hungry.”
Cole meets Chuck’s eyes, “you must have had a family. Or maybe friends. Or… maybe you had someone special outside of these walls,” Cole looks out the nearest window, rubbing his hands together. “I think no matter what, you had to have had something that you loved outside of being Yang’s student. Something that you must have lost after you became a ghost.”
Chuck is as still as ever. What little Cole can see of his face hasn’t changed.
“What I’m trying to say, is that there’s more to life than being Yang’s student. Because when it comes down to it, this isn’t how a sensei should treat their pupil. They wouldn’t keep you locked up in here for eternity. At this point, you’re just a prisoner, Chuck.” Cole balls his hands into fists.
“The world outside of here is amazing. I mean, yeah, there are shitty things going on all of the time, but there are still so many good people!” Cole leans towards Chuck with a growing smile. “Like, there’s this guy I’m dating, and he’s a nervous wreck sometimes and can be kind of dense– but he’s also so sweet and considerate. He tries to make everyone laugh, and he always wants to do better. He’s always trying to improve and be positive and be there for his family.”
Cole looks down at his palms. Even as he loses his sense of touch in his ghost form, the feeling of Jay’s hands stay vivid in his memory. “He’s always been there for me.”
Cole looks back at Chuck, his chest growing tighter as his brows furrow. “I can’t lose him, Chuck. And more importantly, I don’t want him to lose me. I know what it’s like to love someone with all that you have, and then to watch them fade away.” Cole leans closer to Chuck, raising his voice. “He lost me once. By the first spinjitszu master– he rewrote time because of it! I can’t put him through that. I can’t do that to him again!”
Chuck only stares. His eyes are almost entirely white.
They taunt Cole. Curse him for getting into this situation. Curse him for becoming a ghost in the first place.
“I know this is my fault!” Cole slams his fists on the ground. The impact rattles the temple. “I know I should have been more careful and I shouldn’t have fallen for Yang’s tricks but– by the first spinjitszu master– how do you think your friends and family felt when you left! You were important to someone– I know there was someone out there that mourned your death and lit lanterns on the Day of the Departed for you and ran away from home and climbed mountains and became an asshole to everyone because you died! I know you left a hole in someone’s life! Did they deserve that!?”
Cole’s leaning forward on the ground now, his nails pinching his skin as he clenches his fists. He looks up to see Chuck’s emotionless eyes. White voids. Cole’s laying on the ground panting with fury and anger and sadness, and Chuck’s standing there like the villains in that museum’s hall.
Cole sobs, breathless, letting his head fall to the ground.
Tick.
Tock.
Tick.
Tock.
What am I doing .
Cole pushes himself up, staring at the white-clad ghost before him. He’s on the ground, breaking apart, while Yang’s getting closer and closer to unleashing his evil upon ninjago.
The whole grieving and family trauma thing will have to wait for another day.
He breathes in.
I am here, I am safe.
He breathes out.
“Fine. Stand there. I’ll give you three seconds to decide whether or not to help me.” Cole pushes himself from the floor, letting his bangs fall before his eyes.
Chuck doesn’t move. Cole swears the ghost even rolls his eyes.
“One.” He straightens his back.
“Two.” He unclenches his fists.
“Three.” He glares at the ghost before him.
The clock bangs behind him. For the first time since he entered the temple, the student looks away from Cole, towards the clock. It’s enough of a distraction to let Cole bounce off of the surrounding cupboards and kick Chuck in the face. The ghost silently falls to the floor, his eyes fluttering shut and his body falling limp.
“Guess I’m working solo, Chuck,” Cole smirks, walking out of the room with a swagger. He kicks the door shut behind him and manages to pull up a chair to lock the room. Wiping his hands together, Cole surveys the hall, counting the numerous doors and extending hallways within the temple. With a grunt, he marches forward.
It takes ramming into plenty of locked doors and more of Yang’s students before Cole can confront the air-jitszu master himself. By the time he’s through the last pupil, he can barely find the energy to climb out the temple window until he hears the rush of wind.
“Stop it, Yang!” His chest painfully clenches as he tries to usher out a shout over the growing whirlwind. With another heave, Cole pushes himself out of the window and onto weather-torn tiles.
“Freedom! Return!” Yang appears over the roof of the temple in his air-jitszu cloud, rising towards the glowing rift in the sky, “It’s all mine!”
The rift had to be his way back to the living.
Cole didn’t want to imagine what horrors that reality would bring.
Chest seizing once again, Cole tries to activate his air-jitszu. As much as a ghost doesn’t have much physical strain, the energy it took to fight back against the student drained him more than he could have thought.
The first attempt releases nothing more than a breeze around him. He can feel his limbs grow numb. His hands almost entirely lose feeling.
The same hands that held Jay’s.
Cole grits his teeth and tries again. He can feel the soil below the temple vibrate with anticipation. Desperation and hope fills his chest.
He couldn’t return to Jay like this. Yang was right about one thing, Cole was fading. Jay may not have forgotten about him yet, but it was only a matter of time. If anyone was going to go through that rift, it was Cole.
The third time, Cole can feel more energy from the courtyard’s earth rise to meet him. The natural energy gave him strength. Flexing his arms and clenching his fists, he let his nails dig into his palms as he began to turn. The wind rises around him, dirt and rock fliies into the vortex and Cole knows–
It doesn’t work.
Rising no more than a foot into the air, Cole lands back on the tiles, the unsteady temple rumbling under the impact.
He wasn’t going to see Jay again if he couldn’t catch Yang. He wasn’t going to see his friends, or have that conversation with his dad, or tell Jay what’s been going on, or be able to finally put his lantern where it belongs.
“I am here. I am safe,” Cole grits out, voice cracking.
The earth below rumbles once more.
- - -
“I want to go home!” Cole screams, stomping down the dirt path from where they came.
“Cole! Cole come back here it’s dangerous!”
“I don’t care!” He doesn’t bother turning around to shout, too determined to make his way back down the mountain.
“Cole, please, I wanted to talk to you!”
The trees groan against the wind, their red and orange leaves blown away. Cole growls as one of them lands in the middle of his face, and he flails momentarily while trying to remove it. “You only want to tell me what an ass– what a buttface I’ve been! What a bad son! I already told you that I didn’t start the fight but no one ever believes me!”
Cole stomps on the leaf as it falls to the ground. He takes another step forward to continue his rampage, only to stop as a tender hand rests on his shoulder. “You’re the best son I could have ever asked for, Cole.”
Face burning, Cole turns to glare at his mother. She watches at him as well. Her large eyebrows high on her forehead, and her soft eyes sympathetic. Her hair is piled at the back of her head in a loose bun, letting thick strands fall around her ears. Her nose and cheeks are tinged pink in the cool autumn air. She smiles apologetically. “I’m sorry for making you think otherwise.”
A lump forms in Cole’s throat as he quickly rubs his eyes and nose, sleeves becoming wet. He takes a couple shaking breathes. “Oh.”
The previous master of earth lightly holds his hands. “Breathe with me Cole. In… I am here…” They both take a deep breathe. “And out… I am safe…” A long exhale.
Cole follows, his trembling breathes evening out.
“Better?” She asks patiently.
“Yeah.”
She nods her head softly, her smile growing. “Now, I’m not here to talk about what happened at school either. Although your teachers and father see it differently, I know you were just doing what was right.”
Cole looks between his feet, his face heating up. “Thanks,” he mumbles.
“Now, do you care to join me the rest of the way, or would you rather we spend this Day of the Departed back at home?” She rests her hand just behind Cole’s shoulder, light enough that he could maneuver out of her touch if he so wanted.
“Anything’s better than watching the family grave eith dad, mom,” Cole grumbles, leaning into his mother’s hand and looking up at her amused expression once more.
She chuckles, guiding him forward as they walk up the path together. “I thought you would say that. And to think you were so eager to go back down a few moments ago.”
“Sorry, mom.”
“It’s alright, Cole. It was a simple miscommunication.” She lowers her hand from his arm, into the pocket of her jacket. “This is why it’s important to talk to one another. I wanted to make it a suprise of why I was bringing you up here, but I failed to realize what you thought of the situation.”
The dirt and leaves crunch under their feet. The wind, the ground, the quiet chatter of animals all fill the silence between them as they venture up the mountain.
“Where are we going, exactly?” Cole rubs the fabric of his pockets between his fingers.
“You’ll know it when you see it.”
Cole rolls his eyes. “Does this have something to do with ‘honouring our ancestors’ or whatever?”
“hmm,” his mother looks at the branches above their heads for a moment. “No.”
Cole jumps across the stones littering their path. His mother glides across them.
“So it doesn’t have to do with the Day of the Departed?”
“It does.”
Cole almost misses the next rock he tries to jump on. “Huh!?”
His mother chuckles, her shoulders shaking as she marches forward. “You’ll understand shortly.”
Cole groans and continues to follow her.
Their dirt path blends into the forest floor. They cross over dead grass and colourful leaves and streams and rocks. Occasionally Cole’s mother will turn and they’ll see a different view of the forest, but the autumn scenery begins to look the same after a while.
The wind settles, giving way to the louder voices of the forest life. Cole can hear birds call, the streams bubble, and his own huffs as they continue to ascend the mountain face.
As his legs complain, Cole stops to finally ask his mother if they’ve reached her magical destination, when he catches a glance at the view beyond the trees.
“Woah…” Cole gasp, stepping between their trunks as he surveys the valley.
His family lived in the valley between several mountains. From below, the roll of hills and the expanse of trees covering the sky were normal. From here, the sky stretched out into a canvas of colours. The space above was dark blue, and the horizon was coloured in blazing oranges and yellows as the sun disappeared under trees of green. All the space in between faded into beautiful pinks and peaches with clouds dotted between. The twinkle of stars starts to shine through the colours.
Cole can only stare.
“In the end, you might not enjoy this as much as I do, but I think you’ll agree that this beats freezing by the family grave all day.” His mother steps beside him, leaning down to take her own view of the valley.
“It’s beautiful, mom…”
“I’ve always thought so too. This is where I go when life in the town becomes a bit too hectic. Helps to clear my head.”
Glancing over, Cole’s brows furrow, “are you sure this doesn’t have anything to do with the fight I had at school?”
His mother grins, glancing sideways at him. “It doesn’t. I’m not here to tell you to walk up a mountain everytime you think of throwing a punch.” She stands straight again, resting her hands on her hips as she looks out. “But, I’m here to tell you that it’s important to look at the bigger picture.”
Looking between the view of the town, and his mom, Cole rolls his eyes, “was all of this for that one pun, mom?”
She laughs, wholeheartedly bending over and leaning on her knees. She wipes her eyes as she stands up, her crooked teeth shining. “Maybe a little bit. But seriously, I just wanted to show you that taking the time to observe the situation can help out a lot.”
Cole groans and sits by the trees, still watching the village below.
“You’re a lot like me, Cole, and I always went at my problems head-first. If there was a solution, I’d find it as fast as possible using my own two hands.”
The sun sinks lower below the mountaintops, and the red lights of the lanterns below begin to blink on, one by one.
“Which can be good— you should never run from your problems— but at the same time, it can be dangerous.”
“I know,” Cole groans, “the teachers say this all the time .”
“They say that you should never use your fists. I say that you must think about why you use your fists.”
Cole looks back at his mother, the wind blowing her hair out of her bun. “What?”
“Your hands can be used to save people. To move obstacles and make new paths. Your hands can be used to protect people. To defend against villains and make a statement. But, they can also be used to help yourself.” She crouches down at eye level with Cole, her eyes crinkling at the edges.
“Those are good reasons for why you use your fists. But it’s also very easy to use your fists because you’re angry. And that’s dangerous because when you’re angry, you don’t care who is taking your punches. You could use your fists against someone you love, Cole.” Taking his hands in her own, Cole’s mother wraps them together. Her palms are warm.
His head feels muddled. “But I wouldn’t…”
She shakes her head. “That’s why you must be careful. You must stop and think about why you need to use your fists. You must always look at the bigger picture, so you can do what should be done.”
He looks at his mother’s hands. Her skin is rough, calloused after so many years. Yet they’re gentle around his hands.
“I never want to hurt my family.”
He looks up at his mother and finds her smiling. “I know.”
He smiles back, and she wraps her arm over his shoulders and they look out at the sunset together.
Cole bites his lip. “I thought you said this has something to do with the Day of the Departed?”
“It is. The holiday’s not just about honouring the departed, Cole.” Lilly rests her head on her son’s hair. “It’s about spending time with those we’re still fortunate to have. Never forget about those you love, Cole. They’ll be your rock no matter what happens. Sometimes, they’ll even be who you’ll use your fists for.”
- - -
She’s gone.
His mother’s returned to the earth, torn away from him by a wicked disease.
This was the one day a year he let himself fall apart for her. It’s the one day he wouldn’t let slip away. He had better things to do with the people he loved than lay around in an abandoned temple with a fading body and a wicked ghost about to wreak havoc on his world.
Cole wouldn’t let it happen. Not when his friends were waiting for him, fighting ghosts. Not when his dad was still performing. Not when Jay had left his lantern behind.
His mother taught him an important lessons on the last Day of the Departed they spent together. A lessons he almost forgot.
I will always fight for those I love.
“You are not going,” Cole remembers the smile his mother gave him on that mountainside. “ANYWHERE!”
Earth flies around him, swirling with air into a defensive screen. Wind continues to pull the environment around Cole into a perfect shield around him, and his feet lift off the floor. His hair whips around his face as Cole stretches up, farther and farther as Yang grows clearer in his vision.
He soars toward the man, reaching out his arm and grabbing his leg. Yang howls in anger, feverishly trying to shake off Cole. The abrupt movements distract both of them from their air-jitszu, and Cole can feel the screen around him collapse as Yang’s protective shield dissipates. Like lead in his stomach, Cole gravity slowly tugs at his core, before he’s plummeting to the earth. Yang breaks free of Cole’s grip long enough to grab his collar and punch him. As they fall, they continue to break out into a fit of strikes until they’re tumbling over each other.
As Cole turns himself over and stares down at Yang, ready to throw another punch, he screams at the proximity of the temple’s roof. Yang turns his head and looks just in time for his face to slam into the tiles.
The impact throws Cole off of Yang and throws him across the roof, knocking the wind from his ghostly body.
The energy he’s managed to gather to fly up to Yang seeps out as he lies on his back, staring at the starry sky. The little lights flicker in the evening fog, dazzling Cole’s exhausted mind. He slowly raises a shaking hand to touch the white dots.
He’d seen many starry skies. Ones over mountains with his mother. Ones dulled by lights on long nights waiting for his father. Ones between horrid battles. Ones next to someone who feels just like home.
A clatter of pebbles pulls Cole from his rest, forcing him to sit upright and watch Yang stumble to the edge of the roof.
Gritting his teeth once more, Cole grabs a nearby sword– discarded by someone at some point– and pushes through the billowing wind.
The sword clattering against the roof as Cole picks it up catches Yang’s attention. He turns and glares at Cole, his hat battling the wind. “Just give up already!”
“No!” Cole cries, raising his sword for another fight, “I’m keeping you here until the eclipse ends, and the rift closes!”
Yang takes a step back, and Cole takes another forward, beginning to walk through the storm. “As long as I’m here, your evil will never return to Ninjago!”
Yang’s eyes flare and he slings his blade forward, Cole’s sword barely catching it before it could slice his face.
The metal of the weapons rings out, even through the roaring whirlwind. Cole’s body shakes, exhausted from non-stop fighting and trying to stay together through the fading and blacking out. Each strike from Yang feels like another strike against his soul, wearing down his mind until he can barely rely on even muscle memory to maintain the fight.
“What are you even fighting for!?” Yang cries, his grunts sounding more strained. “Your friends have abandoned you!”
Cole can feel a retort boil on his tongue, but Yang pushes him back with a powerful blow before Cole can spit it out. He goes flying into the slats of the roof, everything splitting as he tries to get up.
“Your master had abandoned you. You are all alone!”
Cole stares forward, the wind blowing at his hood. For a moment, everything is so loud and painful that Cole feels a strange calm. An overwhelming sense of nothingness.
He breathes.
He thinks of elemental ninjas. A master older than time. A father who is never gone for long. A boyfriend; a partner who would change the world for him.
He thinks of his mother showing him the beauty of their little village.
He could never be alone, even if he wanted to.
If this was the last time he could fight, Cole would ensure that Yang would never hurt someone as he hurt Cole ever again.
With a roar, Cole leaps from the roof and flips around. His sword is poised to strike Yang, and the ghost manages to kick him in the gut, sending him flying backward once more.
Yang continues to strike, eventually ruining Cole’s sword and leaving nothing but a handle in his hand.
The man laughs, raising his blade with a wicked smile.
“I– I can’t go on… alone…” Cole gasps, clutching his stomach as he tries to maintain his sanity. He can barely make sense of his surroundings as he lies on the ground, watching silver flash above his head.
“Yes! Yield!” Yang cackles, “Soon I will be gone, but you will remain forever departed! Destined to haunt this temple forever, as the new master of the house!”
Cole watches the man in horror, his vision growing blurry. Everything begins too feel distant and fuzzy. He shakingly removes his hood, desperate to feel something– anything to tell him he’s not departed. He absentmindedly looks at his hands, growing paler and more transparent. “I’m fading… away…” he whispers.
“Just one more lonely ghost. Not a friend in the world~” Yang taunts, twirling his blade in his hand.
Cole lets himself fall. He lets go of his mind, his hands, everything. anticipating the clean cut of Yang’s blade, he whispers a sob, “...mom.”
A pebble is blown to his side, bumping into his leg and drawing his attention to a sudden change in the wind.
“COLE!”
The voice pierces his ears, entirely drawing his eyes to the ship parting the nearby clouds. It calls out again. And again. And again until Cole recognizes the man standing at the bow of the ship.
“What! Who’s that!?” Yang angrily waves his blade, clutching it at his side.
Cole’s grin splits his face, “My boyfriend!”
Jay’s voice continues to sing in his ears as Cole pulls his hood back on. He grabs what he can of his mind and body and raises from the deck, and cracks his knuckles.
Yang, still distracted by the oncoming ship, doesn’t notice Cole flying toward him and kicking him in the stomach. The ghost falls against the roof as Cole balances himself.
“Ghost or not, I’m gonna do what I came here to do, Yang!” Cole shouts.
Yang rises once again and they fight, blade to fist.
“And you’re wrong! I’m not the one who’s alone!” Cole backs up enough from Yang to point at him.
“No! I have my family!” Yang waves his blade at the shaking students on the lower roof.
Cole bites his tongue to keep from laughing. “That’s not family! Family will always stick by your side! They show you sunsets and let you know you are loved!”
The earth below Cole’s feet rumbles. He can feel pressure grow within his arms.
Cole stomps closer to Yang, “Your students are nothing but prisoners in your captivity!”
Earth shifts. Rocks roll toward him.
Cole aims another punch and throws Yang against the roof’s decor. “Don’t disrespect what family means when you have never known what love means!”
Something within him cracks. Cole can feel heat flow along his arms. Looking down, his hands glow like lava. “Whoa. I– I feel… different.”
Even in the sky, Cole can feel the earth rumble and shake.
“Like I could punch through…”
Yang interrupts him with another strike aimed at his head. Cole dodges in time to watch the ghost crash into the other side of the roof.
He smiles. “...Anything!”
Cole hits Yang’s blade, shattering it into bits of flying metal.
Yang flies backward, slamming through rows of tiles on the temple’s roof. Around him, his students begin to remove their masks, deliriously looking around.
Yang pushes himself upright, staring in horror at his pupils, “No! You broke my spell!”
Cole turns towards them, “the rift! If you hurry, you can be free of this place forever!” All together, they fly towards the opening in the sky, leaving Cole and Yang alone on the shattered roof.
“My… my students… leaving me!” Yang slowly falls back against the tiles. “I… failed.”
Cole scoffs, “yeah, you did.”
“I always fail.”
“Yeah, you… wait, what?” Furrowing his brows, Cole steps down the roof and beside Yang.
“I dedicated my life to studying the martial arts. Alone.” His face falls. “I got arrogant, I wanted to live forever.”
“Why?” Cole reaches out a hand and pulls up the ghost. “No one lives forever.”
“Because I knew the day I was gone, no one would remember me.”
Cole’s mouth falls. “All of this was so you wouldn’t be forgotten?”
“You must think I’m a fool for having such a petty desire…”
Cole chest tightens, twisting into knots. He thinks of everyone. He thinks of why he came in the first place.
“No, I get it. Believe me. Why do you think I came here?” Cole shakes his head, “I felt alone– forgotten by the people I love the most.” He looks to the bounty, still hovering in the distance. “It hurts. It feels like you’re losing them. It feels like you’re grieving them, even when they’re supposed to still be there.”
Cole lifts a hand to the ghost’s shoulder, furrowing his brows. “But master Yang, you were already gonna be remembered forever!”
“Me? How?”
“You created Airjitszu!”
Yang’s facade cracks. He bites back a sob and buries his face in his hands.
Jay’s voice carries just over the billowing wind, “Cole! It’s now or never! Go!”
“Let’s go, Yang. There’s still time to go through. Both of us.” Cole rests both hands on the ghost’s shoulders, trying to give a sympathetic smile.
Yang looks up, a harder resolve on his face now. Hanging onto Cole, they rise through the air and towards the rift.
The old master sighs, “Cole, I’m afraid I cannot join you.”
Cole glances over his shoulder and catches Yang’s sad smile. “I’m afraid the curse requires one ghost to stay behind as master of the house.”
“You’re… going to stay here?”
“I must.” He states, maneuvering out of Cole’s grip.
“Yang, no!” Cole tries to twist to better see the ghost, “What are you doing!?”
Yang sighs and shakes his head, loosening his grip around Cole. “Settling my debt!”
Horrified, Cole watches the ghost fall.
Yang gives him a final smile.
The sky flashes white.
- - -
A breeze blows through the temple grounds. The team takes shuddering breathes as they look around.
“He was too late… he’s gone forever!” Jay sobs. “I’d give anything to have him back.”
“Anything?”
“Anything!” Jay cries into his hands.
“Even the Sonic Raider Jet!?” Cole shouts as he hops the boulder he landed behind.
Misako shouts as Cole appears behind her, drawing the group’s attention to the man standing before them. His gut twists with guilt as he sees the tears in their eyes.
“COLE!” Jay sobs, pushing past everyone to slam into his boyfriend. He swings his arms around the man’s neck and his legs around his torso. With a shout, Cole falls backward, the wind knocked out of him. “I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU SO MUCH! YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE I SWEAR BY THE FIRST SPINJITSZU MASTERIMNEVERGONNALETYOUHAVEPUDDINGEVERAGAIN—!”
Cole can feel– he can feel!-- the tears fall from Jay’s eyes into his neck as he tries to breathe. “What?” He wheezes.
His chest is tight. Everything hurts and he can feel the dirt make it’s way down his suit as Jay continues to pin him to the ground and cry and Cole can feel him shake and he’s shaking too—
“You leave in the middle of the fucking night without telling anyone to go fight Yang!? ” Jay raises his head, face burning red as tears stream from his eyes. “What the shit! And then you take your sweet fucking time punching the fucking dude, and go through the portal at the last possible second and make me think you died! I. Hate. You!”
Jay cuts himself off. His eyebrows rise as he slowly closes his mouth.
“W-what?” Cole tries to say, only to have his chest buckle and his throat close up. His face suddenly feels very hot as tears stream down his cheeks. “I– I don’t know why I’m–”
A sob wracks through him as Jay’s face scrunches up further. He shuts his eyes as he cries again and unhooks an arm from Cole’s neck to hold the man’s face. He rubs his thumb along his cheek, brushing away the falling tears. “I’m so glad you’re alive.”
“Oh enough hogging him, Jay!” Cole looks around his boyfriend to see Kai feverishly wiping his eyes and stiffly standing above them. “The rest of us need a turn to give him a proper beating after the shitshow he put us through!”
Someone falls beside them and Cole looks to his left to see Nya laying on her back, drying her tears as she smiles at him. “You piece of shit. You were so stupid you made my ass of a brother cry.”
“I’m not crying!” Kai tries to protest as he sobs and sits on Cole’s other side, beside Jay.
Jay’s laughs reverberate through Cole’s chest as he pushes himself up to look back at Kai. “Yeah right. Is that just dust in your eyes, then?”
“Yes!”
“We’re all very happy you’re back, Cole. Even happier that you’re back to your human self.” Zane smiles softly, sitting cross-legged by Cole’s head. His metallic cheeks are cut down with wet streaks.
“Yes. As much as I do not approve of your methods,” Wu sighs, a smile tugging at his beard, “it is a relief that you no longer have to deal with being a ghost.”
Misako nods beside him, wiping her own tears with a handkerchief.
“Not that you weren’t cool as a ghost,” Lloyd cuts in, draping his legs over Cole’s as he lays down, “but we know you were missing how you used to be.”
“W-what?” Cole tries to say through the lump in his throat, but it comes out more as a sob as he lifts his hand to see his skin. No greenish hue, no transparency, just a hand.
He sputters, tears completely coating his face as he laughs and cries and hugs Jays and leans back and feels the rest of the group closes in to form a cuddle pile.
Cole should probably explain what happened, but for the first time in months he can finally cry, and he’d rather savour the moment.
The story of Yang’s temple can wait until another day.
- - -
Cole doesn’t realize how much of a relief is it to just hold Jay’s hand. There’s no energy spent on focusing on the warm and pressure, no effort needed to keep his hand solid. They’re just able to hold hands.
“I know you said you’re okay now, but you look like you wanna cry again, dear.” Jay takes a step in front of Cole, brows raised in something between amusement and sympathy.
Cole chuckles— man does it feel good to have his normal, non-echoing voice back— “I’m okay, I swear. It’s just nice to hold your hand.”
Jay squeezes their fingers and sighs, smiling. “You’re so cheesey.”
“And you love it.”
“Shush.” Jay pulls Cole forward on their walk of the bounty’s deck.
Cole closes his eyes as he cherishes the breeze blowing against his face.
“You said I could talk to you about my thing with the Day of the Departed, right?”
Jay slows his pace and looks back at Cole, “I assumed with the story of Yang that you told to all of us that there wasn’t much more to tell.”
Cole shakes his head. “No, it’s not about that.” With a sigh, he meets Jay’s soft eyes. “You noticed how I never liked the holiday. How you said I got distant?”
Recognition lights up Jay’s face, his brows twisting. “I’m listening.”
“Ok. Well..” Cole starts, slowing to a halt, tightening his grip on Jay’s hand as he looks at the nearby mountain tops. “As you probably figured out, I hate the holiday. And not just ‘cuz of Yang or being a ghost.”
A glance confirms Jay’s still watching him. He runs his free hand through his hair.
I am here. I am safe .
“It was my mom’s favourite holiday. She was all about remembering ancestors and honouring them. It’s why we’d always spend time at our family grave for the day instead of getting candy or doing what everyone else does with their kids.” A lump begins to form in his throat as his eyes burn. It still takes a minute to register that crying’s a thing he can do now.
Jay squeezes his hand and gives him a small grin.
Cole gives a small smile back, clearing his throat. “But more than that, she liked to spend it with me and my dad. She always found it important to value the time we have with those we love, while we still have it.”
Cole looks back to the mountains.
“It’s things like that which make me wonder if she knew she was dying.”
He ought to apologize to Jay after this for clutching his hand so tight.
“The last Day of the Departed we had together, she took me up one of the mountains we lived by, and showed me this pretty view of our town. And by the first spinjitszu master, Jay.” He can’t bare to look at the lightning master for long when he already feels like he’s on the brink of tears, so he just glances and smiles. “It was beautiful.”
The wind around them is the only thing they hear for a moment as Cole takes a deep breathe.
“She told me that it was important for me to remember family and everything…”
she wraps her arm over his shoulders and they look out at the sunset together.
“She died a few weeks later. She had already been getting sick at the time, but we all thought it’d pass. By the realms, even that day together, she was going up that mountain like it was nothing and then she—”
Jay throws his arms around Cole as he chokes on his words. Years later and it’s still no easier to talk about.
He lets himself bury his face in Jay’s hair. He lets the tears fall.
Eventually the lump leaves and Cole breathes again.
“I’ve always associated the holiday with her. I’d always honour it by visiting the family grave. Somewhere along the way it also turned into me avoiding everyone I love too.” Cole hugs Jay a little tighter. “But I remembered that day with her tonight, and I’ve realized that just avoiding everyone and trying to deal with this on my own probably isn’t the best way to deal with it.”
“Yeah, maybe not,” Jay responds lightly.
Cole smiles sadly. “Yeah. So I’m thinking I should probably start honouring those I still have, instead of just mopping around all day on my own.”
“You’re allowed to mop all you want, Cole.” Jay pushes back from the hug enough to meet Cole’s eyes. “Just don’t shut everyone out.”
“Yeah, okay.”
“I’m always here to help too.”
“I know.”
“Okay.”
“Okay.”
Cole leans back against Jay and buries his face in his hair again.
“Oh shit,” Cole whispers, eyes flying open.
Jay slowly pulls apart from the hug again, face turning suspicious. “What do you mean, ‘oh shit’.”
“It’s not a bad , ‘oh shit’. I was just supposed to meet my dad tonight.”
“Oh?” Jay raises his eyebrows.
“Yeah. I was suprised too. He called me this morning.”
“Huh. That’s…” Jay glances around, searching for the right word. “… Interesting.”
“Yeah, that’s one way of putting it,” Cole sighs, “at the time I really didn’t want to see him— feeling like shit and all— but I ended up agreeing and now…”
Cole looks at the mountaintops again.
“He’s my family. He’s shit family, but he’s still my dad.” Jay rests his chin on Cole’s shoulder. Cole leans his head against Jay’s. “I feel bad about not seeing him tonight.”
“I mean, I doubt he’ll blame you for having to fight Yang and, y’know, save Ninjago for the five hundredth time. But I get what you’re saying. It’s shitty.” Jay pats Cole’s back, “I know it’s late, but maybe you can still see him?”
“Now?”
“Yeah. It couldn’t hurt to try! It’s the night of the Day of the Departed, so everyone stays up late anyways!”
“Hmm. Maybe.” Cole turns the idea over in his head.
He raises his and catches the edge of Jay’s smile, “see, I’m helpful!”
Cole chuckles and shakes his head. Pressing a kiss to Jay’s temple, he sighs. “You are. Most of the time”
“Hey, what’s that supposed to mean?”
Cole laughs breathes it all in. The breeze brushes against his face. Jay is warm against his chest.
He is whole again.
“Thank you, Jay.”
- - -
Cole doesn’t meet his dad that night.
Instead, his hand shakes as he presses each number into his phone. The process is painstaking. He can’t tell if it’s the nerves or his new mortal body that’s making his fingers go numb as he tries to type in the remaining digits.
The red phone call button taunts him. In the dark of his room, it shines like a warning beacon. It’s a singular red eye staring into his mind, leaving him bare as he leans over the device.
Biting his lip, Cole punches down on the button and listens to the tone dial through.
It’s fine. He’s probably not going to pick up. It’s fucking 1:30 in the morning and he’s been out all night—
“Cole…?” His father yawns, his voice muffled.
His throat closes up. He shouldn’t be this nervous to talk to his dad. His father’s always the one with the doubtful questions and hopeful smiles. Not Cole. Cole doesn’t call his dad.
“Hello? Are you there, son?”
Yet here he is.
“Uh, sorry, dad.” Cole manages to squeeze out. His pulse thunders.
By the first spinjitszu master, I swear my heartbeat wasn’t this loud before.
“You are there!” His voice is quiet, but happy. “Sorry, I didn’t hear you before. I thought you might have butt-dialed me,” he chuckles.
“Yeah…” Cole tries to laugh back, but his body’s still sore. His mind’s tired. “I just needed to—” Cole runs his hand through his hair. The course texture tickling his skin. “—wanted, to. I wanted to tell you I’m sorry I couldn’t make it.”
Cole bites his lip as the phone falls silent. “Something came up and—”
“it’s alright, Cole.” His father breathes, it almost sounds like a relieved noise. “You’re nineteen and a ninja. You have a busy life that I don’t even know half of— as much as it makes me sad to admit.”
Cole’s mouth closes.
His father sighs, “when it comes down to it, it’s never like I’ve been reliable either. You don’t owe me anything, Cole, much less watching one of my hundreds of long shows. I trust that you spent your evening well.”
Jay leans into his shoulder, a soft smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.
“I did. And I know. But I really did want to come.” Cole sighs. “I’m sorry.”
His father chuckles, “it’s okay. We’ll just find another time to see one another. I still want to take you to that noodle shop.”
Cole smile softly and shuts his eyes. “We should do that soon. There’s something I wanna tell you.”
“Oh?” his father replies, all too eagerly.
He grimaces. Telling him about Jay was a confession for another time. Probably several months from now. And the whole ‘being human’ thing was something better done in person. “It’s not like that. I’m free this thursday if you wanted to check out that noodle place.”
“That works for me, as well!” His father yawns. “I know you can’t eat, but I’m sure you’ll still appreciate the atmosphere of the restaurant.”
Cole trails his fingers down his arm, savouring the feeling.
“I think I will.” Cole leans his head back. “Sorry for missing the show, again. And sorry for calling so late too. You were asleep, right?”
“Oh don’t mind that, Cole. I’m happy to get a call from you any time of the day.”
Cole heard the unspoken words. The ‘I never get calls from you’.
His heart stings.
“I’ll see you soon, then.”
“I’m looking forward to it.” His father says. Cole can hear his smile through the phone.
The call clicks off with a final beep.
Cole holds the device in front of him, staring at the screen, the words ‘call ended’ and the blank profile picture he gave his father when he got the phone. His gaze drifts to his fingers, dark skin reaching over bone and veins and flesh. Living hands.
Living touch, living breathe, a living heart. He can feel the blood rushing from his arm as he keeps it in the air. The subtle stinging that pinches his skin. His cool sheets, slowly heating with his body. The slight breeze coming through the crack of his window.
There is so much to feel.
How close was he to loosing it all.
His face stings, his eyes flooding as his cheeks burn.
Crying. He belatedly realizes.
He lowers his phone to his chest, still keeping the screen angled towards his face. The light burns his eyes from the proximity, but Cole stays transfixed on the emotionless silhouette sitting above his father’s name. He blinks through tears. He really has never called his father. Not once.
The man’s an asshole. He neglected his son to escape from his grief. But he’s trying. He walks on eggshells and invites Cole out.
With shaking hands, Cole rubs the tears from his eyes and clicks through his camera roll, scrolling back in time. After a few minutes, he spots the image he was searching for.
In a matter of clicks, his father’s profile lights up with new colours.
Lou Brickstone stands besides a younger Cole, both clad in the royal Blacksmith’s iconic uniforms. Besides them, Kai, Zane and Jay grin at the camera, fitted in similar clothes.
More tears bubble to the surface as his chest swells. He was such a different person back then, but he stills remembers the day in vivid detail.
He smiles softly at the sight of his father.
He can’t wait to see him again.