Chapter Text
Gorou stood in front of the full-length mirror that Itto had so graciously brought over as soon as he caught word of the party he was going to. In fact, as soon as Itto had learned he was going to a party he had told everyone in their friend group and insisted they come over to help him out. Kazuha didn’t seem to have an issue with it because he took a sick sense of pleasure out of embarrassing his roommate it seemed. Thus, Itto, Heizou, Kazuha, and even Shinobu were all crowded into the dorm along with Gorou.
Itto had so graciously offered to help him pick out his clothes for the night, but Kazuha and Heizou had their own opinions on what he should wear. Of course, they all had him put on a fashion show instead of settling on something they could all agree on. Maybe they all derived entertainment from his despair.
“Oh yeah! You look great, bud!” Itto gave him a big thumbs up, putting his hands on his shoulders and shaking him a little too roughly. “Look at yourself! You’ll attract that Koko girl in no time.”
Gorou let out an exasperated sigh, allowing himself to be manhandled by his friend. “Her name is Kokomi.” He sounded slightly irritated as he looked at himself in the mirror again. There was no way he was going to go to a party in a crop top and booty shorts with fishnets underneath. Gorou didn’t even know he had this in his closet! “I-I don’t think I can go like this.” He sounded mortified.
“Well sure you can! You look great! Right guys?” Itto looked to his friends for help.
“You sure do. Give us a spin, pretty boy.” Heizou wolf whistled, making Kazuha let out a genuine laugh. Gorou narrowed his eyes at the flush on Heizou’s cheeks after Kazuha had laughed. Oh yeah, he was definitely going to use this as blackmail later.
After Kazuha and Heizou had betrayed him, Gorou looked at Shinobu desperately in hopes that she would be able to convince Itto that this outfit was far from appropriate. Upon seeing the mirth in her eyes, he knew he was doomed. “You know…Itto has a point. You’ll definitely get attention from Kokomi wearing that.” Even with her mask Gorou knew she was grinning.
His friends were definitely praying for his downfall.
Gorou pushed Itto away as gently as he could, purposefully not looking in the mirror out of sheer embarrassment. “I’m not wearing this.” He said firmly, crossing his arms over his chest. “Does anyone else have other suggestions that don’t involve me looking like a stripper?”
Kazuha let out a shocked laugh, almost falling out of his spot before Heizou caught him and held him close to his chest while he wheezed. Oh yeah. He was definitely going to blackmail him now.
“Hey, I think strippers are pretty!” Itto proclaimed innocently, a small pout forming on his face when Shinobu stood up to smack him upside the head. “What? I didn’t even say anything bad!”
Shinobu grabbed him by the ear, dragging him down to her height and lecturing him while Heizou and Kazuha lost their minds on the couch. Gorou sighed as the dorm broke out in chaos. There was no way he was going to get anywhere with these hooligans.
Walking back to his room, Gorou searched through the deepest parts of his closet to pull out some nice looking options. Skinny jeans weren’t really his style, but they didn’t look bad on him at all. This pair in particular accentuated every asset. That’s probably why he never wore it. Next came a simple but nice yellow sweater. It didn’t exactly scream party outfit, but it was better than whatever getup he had on now.
He was really fighting the urge to tear out his hair while he pulled on the clothes. He loved his friends, he really did, but they all thought that this was some big joke. It was important to him to impress Kokomi as silly as the idea was. This was the first time someone had ever been potentially interested in him back! Of course, he tried not to get his hopes up too much about that.
Gorou took a deep breath as he opened his bedroom door and took a few steps back into the living room. His hands were balled awkwardly at his sides as he waited for his friends to say something about his appearance. Hopefully something nice.
Kazuha looked thoughtful. “Not bad.” He wiggled out of Heizou’s hold to approach Gorou, trying to shape his hair with his hands. “We need to do something with your hair though. Actually style it. No offense, but your hair is a mess most of the time.”
“I take offense to that.” Gorou grumbled under his breath, jumping in shock when Itto pulled out his comb and started to comb out his hair gently. “Ah—thanks man, but I can do this myself.” He tried to swat him away, only to have his hands held by Shinobu. She inspected him with a narrow eyed look, nodding finally.
“You could use a little makeup to accentuate your eyes.” She spoke to the rest of the group. “Heizou, do you have any simple jewelry?” Her cold fingers grabbed his ear, making him yelp. “His ears are pierced.”
Gorou was slightly overwhelmed, but wasn’t too distressed quite yet. “I’m right here, you know.” His protests went entirely unnoticed as he was guided to the couch and forced to sit down.
Heizou clapped him on the shoulder roughly, shaking him ever so slightly. “Don’t worry. The beautification team is here to make you look gorgeous.”
For some reason, Gorou didn’t feel entirely confident in that statement.
Despite his worries, his friends actually did a great job. Shinobu had been in charge of making sure his makeup looked good, her careful hands making practiced swipes at his eyes. Thankfully, she didn’t make him look like a clown. The makeup didn’t even look tacky at all.
Kazuha did his hair, wetting it and curling it slightly with a curling iron. It was difficult with how short his hair was, but Kazuha did a good job despite it. Gorou began to wonder where the hell he had learned how to do this, but was quickly distracted by Heizou. Heizou’s job was accessories. And even though Gorou was sure he would make him look like an old lady from the 80’s, he actually gave him some modern and simple jewelry. And as for Itto…well, he was enough moral support for fifty people.
By the time his friends had finished dolling him up, Gorou felt significantly less shy. Hell, he was even feeling slightly confident in his appearance. When he looked in the mirror he didn’t just see a scrawny loser. He actually looked really good. Kazuha had done a good job at styling his hair. The makeup was subtle as well, but brought out his eyes. And the jewelry was flashy, but not obnoxious. The jeans hugged him in the right ways, and the sweater even showed off some of his muscles. He felt as good as he looked. That was a rarity in itself.
Gorou turned to his friends. They were all waiting eagerly for his reaction, each of their eyes bright and expressions lit up. It took Gorou a moment for him to process his words, but when he did, he smiled shakily with tears in his eyes. “Thanks guys.” His voice broke.
Before he knew it, he was being swept up into a hug by Itto. He was definitely crushing his ribs, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care. One by one, his friends joined in to squeeze him too. Damnit. Gorou couldn’t be mad at them for their earlier antics when they were being so nice now. Slowly, he melted into their hug, only trying to push himself away when it became hard to breathe.
They didn’t let go, so Gorou resigned to his fate of being crushed to death with a loud sigh.
♡♡♡
The party was…a little bigger than Gorou was expecting. Needless to say, when he stood in front of the house that was blasting music that could be heard from two blocks down, he was a little intimidated. Kokomi had told him it was going to be more of a lowkey party, but he was sure she wasn’t aware it would be this loud when she invited him to it. She didn’t seem like the type of person to try and deceive him into going to a college rager.
Gorou drummed his fingers against the steering wheel, taking a few deep breaths before he exited his car and locked behind him. There wasn’t really a place to park any closer, so he parked pretty far down. Hopefully whatever neighbors they had weren’t too mad at him for parking by their house. He forced himself to do cyclic breathing, a tool taught to him by his therapist, as he walked slowly down the sidewalk. Standing in front of the house was more scary than he had expected, but it was even worse when he stepped foot inside.
The entire place smelled like booze. It was vaguely humid from the amount of dancing bodies packed into one space as well. Gorou couldn’t help but feel the telltale prickling of his skin that told him this was way too much of a sensory overload. Despite that, he didn’t want to leave before he could see Kokomi.
His eyes scanned the place, flicking over people he knew from previous classes to try and pick out Kokomi’s pink and blue hair. When he spotted her standing awkwardly in a corner, Gorou let out a small sigh of relief. She must have been just as overwhelmed as he felt.
As he made his way over, he had to push through people, politely saying excuse me despite the fact that they weren’t really moving until he wiggled his way through. Upon getting closer to Kokomi, he could see she was clutching a solo cup a little too tightly. She clearly hadn’t drank anything that was in the cup—she was probably holding it so she wouldn’t be bothered by anyone asking her if she wanted a drink.
“Hey!” Gorou finally stepped out of the crowd, standing in front of Kokomi. She was wearing a gorgeous dress that was a bit too light for a party like this. While her one hand was wrapped around the cup, her other hand fiddled with the hem of her dress. She twisted the material between her fingers, her lips pressed into a thin line. But when she saw him, her expression relaxed significantly. His heart pounded in his chest. “You—You look nice!” He tried to say it casually, but it came out squeakier than he intended.
Nevertheless, a light blush dusted Kokomi’s face. “Thank you…” She spoke too quietly to be heard above the pounding music, but Gorou could read her lips fairly well.
Gorou nibbled on his lip for a moment, tucking his hands into his pocket and rocking back on his heels. “Do you want to go outside?” He asked. It must have been too soft considering the way Kokomi looked confused. “Outside!” A little louder this time. He pointed at the patio door to go outside to emphasize his point.
Kokomi nodded furiously, reaching out to take his hand gently and lead him towards the door. Gorou’s heart jumped at the contact, but he didn’t dare pull away. Even if it felt like his hand was tingling. If she wanted to hold his hand, he would gladly let her.
When the two of them made it outside, they sat next to each other on a swinging bench that was a good distance away from some other people who were smoking weed and laughing entirely too loud. Gorou cringed at the noise level, folding his hands in his lap as soon as Kokomi let go of his hand. He played with one of the rings on his fingers, spinning it idly while he tried not to let his leg bounce to showcase just how nervous he was.
They sat in awkward silence for a while.
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t aware it would be this big.” Kokomi said at the same time as Gorou said “Do you know anyone else here?”
They both went quiet at the same time, flushing and turning their heads away from each other. Gorou spoke again tentatively when the silence persisted. “I didn’t mean that to offend you. I was just wondering. This seems kind of crazy…haha…” He laughed, but it fell flat. A moment later, he cleared his throat. “This doesn’t really seem like your kind of scene. No offense.”
“I don’t take offense to that. You’re correct.” Kokomi started to play with her dress again, eyes downcast. “I don’t go to parties. Especially not ones this big.” She hesitated for a long moment. “…I only came because I overheard other people talking about it. I wanted to…spend more time with you I suppose.”
Kokomi wanted to spend time with him out of all people? He had no clue what she meant by that. Maybe she just wanted to be friends. She seemed like she lacked those based on their last conversation. He tried not to read too much into it.
Gorou must have been quiet for too long because Kokomi was biting her lip and picking more fervently at her dress. “Oh! Yeah! I like spending time with you too!” He laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. “Maybe next time we could do something uh…less noisy?”
Kokomi hid her smile with her hand. “Yes. I suppose…” She cleared her throat delicately.
“Hey…” Gorou started, backtracking a few steps and drumming his fingers against his thighs. “Why do you hide your face when you smile?”
The woman looked shocked at his question, but she didn’t appear to be offended or angry. Instead, she let out a soft laugh, hiding it behind her hand again. “I never noticed I did that.” She folded her hands in her lap. “I think…I’ve been trying to mask my emotions for a long time. Not because I think it makes people look weak, but it feels too vulnerable for me. I enjoy being calm and composed. It’s harder to crack under the stress that way.”
Gorou took in her words carefully. “I get that actually. You were in a lot of stuff in high school too. I’m guessing that made it easier for you to stay calm while speaking to people every day?” She nodded, still silent. “I never really thought about how stressed you might be trying to maintain a good reputation. I’m sorry.”
“You don’t have to apologize, Gorou. We didn’t even talk to each other in high school. We were worlds apart.”
He swallowed the ball of emotion stuck in his throat. “Do you still think we’re worlds apart?”
Kokomi turned her gaze to him, looking at him shyly. It might have been a trick of the light, but he thought she was blushing too. “I don’t think so anymore. I always wanted to approach you, you know.” She inched a little closer. “I think I was just…scared.”
“Of what…?” Gorou’s voice came out too broken. Too quiet. “Kokomi, I—“
Before he could finish, the door into the house was flung open. Both of them startled and backed away from each other quickly as if nothing happened.
Gorou turned his head towards the noise and was promptly barreled into by a flash of blonde. “Gorou!” Her voice was cheery, if not a bit slurred. “I didn’t know you were coming! You should have let me know!”
Gorou smiled thinly at Yoimiya. She was always a delight to be around, but he was in the middle of a conversation. He couldn’t help but be antsy to return to it. They were finally getting somewhere too! But alas, Yoimiya was still shaking him by his shoulders. She was always high energy. He appreciated that in a personn when he was on his own, however…
“Oh oh oh! Gorou! Let’s get you a drink!” Yoimiya rested her head on top of his. She was very clearly not sober. “And-And we can dance too!” She giggled a bit, pulling away from behind him to grab his hand.
Gorou knew she had good intentions, but the moment he glanced hastily at Kokomi the more he wanted to rip his hand away from her grasp.
Kokomi’s face was carefully blank as she stared at the two of them. “Go ahead.” She said politely, if not a bit crisp. “I’m going to sit here and get some air.” She turned her head away dismissively.
He hesitated for a long moment before sighing gently. It seemed like the conversation was done. “Okay…and uh…I’ll come back okay? I’ll be back soon.” He promised, allowing Yoimiya to lead him inside and into the pulsing crowd of bodies.
It was far too hot and borderline hard to breathe, but the moment Yoimiya got him a drink he seemed to relax. One drink turned into a few—and eventually he was dancing with the group of people. Of course, he stumbled blindly into people and laughed loudly the more wasted he got, but his mind was blissfully blank.
Gorou danced with Yoimiya most of the night. She wasn’t overly touchy, as she wasn’t interested in him that way at all, but the two of them had fun singing drunkenly and almost bowling each other over.
It was hard to tell how much time had passed before Gorou blacked out.
♡♡♡
The morning after the party was…rough to say the least.
Gorou woke up with his cheek plastered to the sticky floor. His back and head ached. He remembered vaguely that someone had slammed their elbow into his back while dancing. He probably had a bruise there. And his head was aching for…obvious reasons.
The sunlight streaming through the windows was far too bright for his poor eyes, but he pushed himself up anyway. The sudden movement made him nauseous. As he leaned back on his hands, he let out a shuddering breath. The memories of last night were hazy at best. When he wasn’t feeling like death he would figure out exactly what happened.
Gorou forced himself to get up, bracing himself on the nearby couch. Nobody could have moved him to the couch? A flash of irritation ran through him, but he ignored that in favor of stumbling towards the kitchen. Most of the people were gone, but there were a select few who were slumped over various pieces of furniture still sleeping. Gorou felt a little bad for them, but not too much.
“Hey! You’re up!” Yoimiya brightened when she saw him drag himself into the kitchen. “I was starting to think you were dead.” She laughed to herself. It was a little too loud for his liking. A grimace passed over his face before he noticed the orange juice and buttered toast on the counter. There were even a few painkillers next to it as well.
“You did this for me?” Gorou sounded touched as he moved towards the food. Food didn’t even sound good to his upset stomach, but he forced himself to eat it anyway. “Mgh. Thanks, Yoimiya.”
Yoimiya yawned, stretching her arms over her head. “It’s the least I could do for you after I dragged you away from your girlfriend to dance.”
Gorou’s face went blank for a second as he processed what his friend was saying. And then suddenly, the memories of last night came flooding back. Sitting with Kokomi outside, talking to her, opening up to her…and promising her he’d be back.
Fuuuuuck.
Apparently he said that out loud because Yoimiya gave him an odd look. “If you have to go I don’t mind.” She patted his shoulder comfortingly. “Girls like flowers if that helps!” She beamed brighter than the sun.
“Thanks.” Gorou grumbled grouchily, dragging a hand down his face. “Yeah I’m gonna…I’m gonna go. Get changed or something.” He cringed. He probably looked terrible right now. “Do you need help, like, picking anything up before I go?”
Yoimiya gave him an odd look. “Huh? No, I’m okay. This isn’t even my house!”
He would never understand her.
It took all of five minutes for Gorou to get his shit together and make the trek back to his dorm. He had not brought sunglasses with him to the party, so unfortunately the sun was only contributing more to his pounding headache.
By the time he made it back to his dorm his head felt like it was splitting open. Miserably, Gorou realized he couldn’t take more painkillers since he already took some at Yoimiya’s not-house. Despite that, he unlocked the door and braced himself to see Kazuha on the couch with his arms crossed.
What greeted him instead was silence.
Gorou was slightly suspicious at the absence of his roommate, but he didn’t exactly need to know where Kazuha was 24/7, so he brushed it off in favor of walking to his room. He hesitated, however, as he passed Kazuha’s door. It was slightly cracked, which formed a pit of worry in his gut. It felt wrong to intrude on his roommate's privacy. But at the same time there was a possibility he could be hurt.
Peering through the crack, Gorou’s face flushed bright red upon seeing his roommate tangled up with none other than Heizou himself. They were sleeping, but it didn’t make it any less traumatizing to see. A chill crawled up his spin, making him shiver and jerk his head away from the door. He was definitely not going to address this. Not now. Or ever really.
Shaking away that mental image, Gorou returned to his door. He would try to be as quiet as possible at least. For his own sanity, of course. He wouldn’t be able to look them in the eyes if they woke up and saw him.
Stomping that thought away, he pulled on a new pair of clothes. He still looked like a bit of a mess, but significantly less so. And when he went to the bathroom (again, as quiet as possible) to brush his hair and teeth, he looked borderline presentable.
Gorou took a deep breath when he exited his room, hesitating while he was in the living room. He thought that buying flowers would have too many romantic connotations and might scare her away, but nobody said giving her a game was off of the table. He did have an otome game he had never gotten around to playing…maybe it would be something Kokomi was interested in? A peace offering of sorts. More of a plea for her to hear him out, at least.
He really didn’t want to go. He didn’t want to show his face while it was still so fresh. But he knew if he didn’t do it today it would be far worse.
Gorou nodded to himself, trying to psych himself up as he exited his dorm and locked it behind him. He could do this. He could do this!
♡♡♡
He couldn’t do this.
Standing in front of Kokomi and Sara’s dorm was far more terrifying than standing at the front of the house last night. And that was saying a lot!
For a second, Gorou thought about running away. He could pack up, leave the country, block his friends' numbers and change his own so nobody could contact him ever again and…he’d figure the rest out from there. But he knew realistically he couldn’t do that.
And so, Gorou put on a brave face as he approached the dorm. It took him a solid three minutes to even put a hand on the door. For those few minutes, he paced around the outside of the door making up scenarios in his head. It wasn’t until the door abruptly opened that he stiffened, not daring to turn around.
“You have a lot of nerve showing up here after the stunt you pulled.”
Ah. Sara.
Gorou turned around robotically, smiling sheepishly up at her. Her face was a cold mask of fury, a carefully contained storm. But the second he opened his mouth to explain himself, she held up a hand that swiftly shut him up.
“Are you aware that your actions have consequences?” She asked sharply, shaking her head when he went to answer again to stop him. “That was rhetorical.” She rubbed a hand down her face, her mask of anger dropping into one of exhaustion. “Give me one good reason why I should let you in.” And when he hesitated, she sighed exasperatedly. “You can speak now.”
Gorou opened his mouth and the floodgates opened. “Sara I…I messed up a lot last night. I know that. I shouldn’t have left her in the first place. I shouldn’t have gotten carried away. And I really should not have forgotten about going back. I knew how lonely she was in the first place. She invited me to the party just to hang out with me more, you know? I don’t know. Maybe I’m just her first friend in a while. Uh…was her first friend in a while.” He corrected himself, wincing under Sara’s deadpan stare. “What I’m trying to say is that I made a mistake. I know that I’m in the wrong, but I want to do everything in my power to try and fix that mistake. It’s really up to Kokomi. I just…want a chance to make things right. I haven’t really treated her well. With the whole not texting her thing and then ditching her at a party.” He coughed into his fist. “Please let me in, Sara. Kokomi can make her own decisions about me when the time comes.”
Sara drew in a sharp inhale. “Tell me one thing, Gorou.” She started slowly, finishing when he nodded. “Do you love Kokomi?”
Gorou swallowed thickly, turning his gaze down before nodding numbly. “...Yeah. Yeah, I do. I think I always have.”
There was a long pause before Sara stepped to the side, grabbing her keys off of the table. “Tell her that then.” As she pushed past him, she paused. Her back was to him still. “Don’t fuck it up this time.”
The sharp click of Sara’s shoes echoed through the hallway as she disappeared, leaving Gorou with his thoughts and an open door.
It took a while for him to step into the dorm. It felt like he was intruding. He pushed on anyway. There was one door open. The room was empty, indicating that it was Sara’s. There was only one more door, shut tight.
Gorou prayed to whatever god was out there as he laid a hand on the door. When he got no answer from a higher power, he knocked. Once. Twice.
The door didn’t budge.
He raised his fist to knock one more time before the door opened suddenly. “Sara…I appreciate you, I do, but please leave me alo–” Her words trailed off as she realized who was standing in front of her. For a heartbeat, they just stared at each other. And then the door began to close.
Gorou shoved his foot between the door and the frame on instinct, yelping when it inevitably smashed his foot. Kokomi didn’t even appear to be sorry either, staring at him with an expression of sheer apathy. “Why are you here?” When she spoke it was less harsh and more…worn out. The more he stared the more he could see how disheveled she looked. It was a far cry from her usual put together look. “Gorou, please leave.” She tried to close the door again harshly, but was still blocked by his foot.
“Shit!” Gorou swore, biting his tongue hard enough to bleed at the pain. “I’m so sorry. Please.” He braced his hand on the door frame. “What I did was messed up. I’m a total asshole. Right after you said you wanted more friends too! What I did was the opposite of friendship.” He grimaced as her face fell. “I’m sorry, Kokomi. I haven’t been the best friend so far. I want to make it up to you though. I want to make things right. You don’t have to forgive me, you don’t even have to listen to me anymore after this. You can throw me out and I’ll never bother you again.” He was breathing a little heavily, worked up by his own rant. “I just…would like a chance to start over with you.”
Silence persisted for a while. Gorou was beginning to give up hope before Kokomi finally spoke again. “I will…allow you a chance to redeem yourself this one time.” She wrapped her arms around herself. “I’m still mad at you though…”
“I know.”
Kokomi nodded sullenly before opening the door. “Sorry about…smashing your foot.”
“I kind of deserved it.” He laughed under his breath, pulling out the game he brought from his coat pocket. “It’s not much of a present, but I thought it would be worse if I came empty handed.”
Kokomi bit her cheek to hide her smile as she took the game gingerly. “...Thank you.” She said softly, emerging from her room and shutting the door behind her. She was dressed down in a simple t-shirt and sweatpants, but she looked absolutely perfect. “Do you want to play?”
It was an olive branch. He would be a fool not to take it.
“Yeah…!” Gorou’s proverbial tail wagged. “I can get us drinks while you get it setup maybe? You know your computer better than I do.” He shrugged. “It’s not a gaming session unless you have something to drink. I can make us tea?”
Kokomi nodded slowly, walking towards the living room while Gorou went to the kitchen. It wasn’t hard to find what he needed to make tea, but it did take an excruciatingly long time for the water to boil and the leaves to steep. By the time he was done and walked back into the living room, Kokomi was curled up on the couch. Her eyes were shut, gentle snores escaping from her lips.
Gorou couldn’t stifle his fond smile. She must have not gotten a lot of sleep last night. God, he was a shitty friend. But…she did say she would give him another chance. So he would prove that he could be a good friend.
Approaching the couch quietly, he shrugged off his jacket to drape over her body and set down the tea on the coffee table. He was fully ready to leave to let her sleep when he hesitated again. It didn’t feel right to leave again abruptly. Thus why he grabbed a pen and paper from one of the desks, pondering what to say before he started to write.
Kokomi,
You fell asleep before I could give you your tea. I didn’t wake you because you probably needed the rest. The tea is on the table, but it’ll likely be cold by the time you wake up. Sorry about that.
Gorou chewed his cheek. It felt like it was missing something more.
If you can meet me tomorrow
Was he really doing this?
If you can meet me tomorrow we can finish talking. And maybe plan another gaming session. This time preferably while you’re awake.
He scribbled down where to meet him before drawing in a breath and signing his name. He left it right next to the tea cup, debating on tearing it up a few times before he forcibly stopped himself.
Tomorrow. His brain repeated. Tomorrow you tell her everything.
♡♡♡
The next day rolled around far too quickly for Gorou’s liking. When he returned back to his dorm the night prior he couldn’t look Kazuha in the eyes. Just as he had suspected. Kazuha had been suspicious of his strange behavior, of course, but chalked it up to a rough day.
And when the time came to meet Kokomi at the designated spot, his palms were sweaty and his hands felt shaky. There was no guarantee she would even meet him there! Really, he was batting a thousand with this. It was a coward's move to leave a note instead of asking her directly, sure, but it was the only way he thought to do it. The only way he wouldn’t chicken out.
Gorou found himself walking to the park with his hands stuffed into the pockets of his jacket. It was starting to get colder outside. Things were changing. But after every winter came the summer without fail. The cycle of seasons changing comforted him for some reason as he walked. Leaves crunched under his shoes the closer he got to the massive tree where he had asked Kokomi to meet him. The leaves were already starting to fall. He had just begun to give up hope when he saw her.
Kokomi was seated on the bench beneath the tree. Her hands were folded in her lap as she stared up at the falling leaves, watching as they floated towards the ground delicately. Her expression looked peaceful. His heart started to pound.
Gorou forced his limbs to keep moving. It wasn’t until he sat down on the bench next to Kokomi that he finally let out the breath he had been holding all of that time.
Neither of them spoke for a while.
“You know, Kokomi…” Gorou started, fiddling with his jacket as he tried to work up the nerve to say something more.
“I know.” Kokomi cut in softly, ignoring his shocked expression. “I’ve always known.” His face burned as he stared at the ground in shame, but there was no judgment to her tone.
“This whole time…I was waiting for you to notice me. But I guess you already did.” Gorou’s leg started to shake. “How obvious was I?”
A small smile quirked the corners of her lips as she shrugged delicately. “Very.” Gorou buried his face in his hands, but she continued on quickly. “Why do you think I asked our professor if we could be paired together for the project?”
“You…” He sounded genuinely flabbergasted. “Huh? You…”
Kokomi nodded, a flush high on her cheeks. “You really didn’t think I felt the same about you?” Upon seeing him shake his head, she let out a small laugh. “I gave you my number…I waited for you to text…wanted to hang out more after class…invited you to a party?” She was clearly teasing now. “I was trying to find excuses to talk to you, you know. I didn’t expect you’d be so oblivious.”
Gorou wanted to slam his head into the bench and pass out on the ground, waiting for the earth to reclaim his mortal body. Instead of doing that though, he spoke. “I didn’t notice…” He mumbled. “I thought I just had a stupid crush. I didn’t think I had any chance.”
Kokomi laid a gentle hand on his shoulder. “You have caught my eye since high school, Gorou. If anything, I didn’t have a chance with you.” She smiled without hiding her face this time. “And then I noticed the staring and the blushing and the stuttering…” He whined in embarrassment, but she continued. “I wanted a reason for us to talk. I guess I just took matters into my own hands then.”
“You knew I’d never make a move.” Gorou sounded miserable and mortified at the same time. “Oh my god my friends are going to make fun of me so hard.”
Kokomi patted his shoulder again as silence persisted.
“You know, I’m still upset at you for what happened.”
Gorou nodded. “I understand. I don’t blame you.”
“I think…I would still like to talk to you though. I’d like to spend more time with you. And then we can see where it goes from there.” Kokomi looked away shyly. “We can go slow. There’s still a lot we have to learn about each other.”
Gorou nodded again dumbly, a flutter of hope setting his heart aflame. For once, he decided to make a move and tangle their fingers together. Kokomi rested her head on his shoulder.
The leaves floated down, down, down, marking a new change in the world.