Chapter Text
His eyes remained attentive outside, looking at everything from the window. Keeping his hands playing that piano, absentmindedly touching the keys while listening to the melody of you resonate in the distance. His thoughts revolved around that night, the night he said goodbye to Kaeya and where he felt his heart break into a thousand pieces.
His eyes focused on the raindrops falling on the window, he hated rain now. Because it reminded him of Kaeya, because he couldn't stop thinking about him at any time and that was killing him.
...
"All this was something temporary Luc" he heard him say, and he felt like he wanted to die at that moment. His chest hurt so much that he felt like he stopped breathing, he started to shake and his eyes stung, threatening to cry.
He should have foreseen it, of course it was something temporary and he shouldn't have gotten so excited, he shouldn't have believed that they would stay together forever. Of course Kaeya had someone waiting for him at home, he always knew that somehow and yet it hurt so much now.
Maybe all of this had been doomed from the beginning, since their eyes met for the first time on that dock, since the touch of their hands and that stupid smile that he couldn't forget. Now he couldn't help but feel stupid, because he let him in and let him break his heart and he couldn't stop blaming himself for it. Even if it wasn't his fault.
No one was to blame.
"I'm sorry" Kaeya tried to get closer but Diluc moved further away. He looked into his eyes, those beautiful red eyes that always looked at him with a shine, and he discovered that that look only reflected pain. "Diluc I love you"
"No, you don't," he murmured, looking at the bluenette one last time, feeling like everything was collapsing for him.
He ran away before Kaeya saw him cry.
...
And remembering that destroyed him completely, disarmed him and left him crying. He felt empty since Kaeya left, there were thousands of thoughts about him in his head and it overwhelmed him more and more. Because he love him so much, he came to love him with so much intensity that he felt like there was no one else for him now, no one could give him all those sensations that Kaeya gave him, he felt like it was the end for him. He felt like he was drowning in flower petals while the thorns dug into his skin and blood began to flow again from his scars.
Those scars that Kaeya had tried to heal were now bleeding again.
He felt so sad and at the same time so angry. It felt like an old sweater, which Kaeya had told him was his favorite.
He knew that Kaeya was an idiot, a mediocre man who was not worth it and yet Diluc would be willing to return to his arms, if one day he returned Diluc would run straight to him; If one day he called, I would answer without a doubt; If Kaeya wanted to see him he would go anywhere. He felt stupid for knowing that, that weakness he had for that young man and that made him feel so happy and miserable at the same time.
All summer he had been following Kaeya, and now he stayed in bed looking at the screen of his phone, checking his chats constantly waiting for a message or a call, waiting for a sign that this love was mutual.
Every night without fail he cried, lamenting about everything, pounding his head with his fists in despair and frustration.
Surely all his friends were tired of seeing him look down on someone who wasn't worth it, they probably thought he was pathetic.
That summer came back to a moment in time for Diluc, remembering it wistfully as he tried to move on. And when he let go of that memory, when his feelings had been buried deep in his heart.
Kaeya came back.