Chapter Text
"I'll get it, " Snow says without meeting my eyes and stands up. He seems dejected and upset.
He opens the door and Bunce rushes in.
"Basil, here-- Simon?" Bunce starts but stops when she sees Snow is the one who opened the door.
"Hey," He says awkwardly.
"You're - you're not under the influence?"
"No. I'm good now." Snow shrugs.
"But how? The potion stays for twenty four hours. It's barely been two." Bunce asks befuddled.
"Um... "
"Basil, explain." She turns to me when Snow doesn't respond quick enough.
"It's better if he tells you." I look away.
"Simon," She faces him again.
"So you know how I told you about my - uh - feelings about Baz?" Snow starts with his hands awkwardly buried in his curls.
"He knows now?" She seems surprised at that. Did Snow plan on keeping it to himself forever and get over it? I don't like the thought of that.
"Uh yeah.. See that's how -" Snow seems at loss for words.
"I'm gay," I blurt out and then realise that it was a stupid, unusual thing to say. And no one asked me. What is with me blurting out my sexual orientation today?
"Alright. Congratulations, Basil. I... support you...?? " Bunce says awkwardly.
I hide my face in my hands in shame and groan.
"So-uh - I learnt that while under the influence and...I-"
"Are you telling me that you fought your way out of a love potion because you learnt Baz would be upto fuck with you, "
I wince.
"Pretty much... yeah." Snow finishes lamely.
"I should've known," Bunce says in awe. "I shouldn't be surprised. If there's anyone who could fight their way out of this, it had to be you."
"On that note, could you please tell Baz that I liked him before the potion?"
"He liked you before the potion," Bunce says almost mechanically at first and then start getting increasingly animated. "Wouldn't stop talking about you when you didn't come at the beginning of the year. And then wouldn't stop when you did come. If I have to one more poem about how your beautiful dark, raven hair falls out from behind your ears and into your eye-"
"All right, Penny. That's enough you can leave now." Snow interrupts and starts pushing her out.
"Right. So you don't need the potion then?" She hold up the vial of the antidote.
"No-" Snow begins.
"Wait-" I stop him before he finishes. "Leave the potion. We're going to need it," I rise from my chair and extend my hand towards her.
"What? Why?" Snow asks me.
"Sure," Bunce says sceptically but hands me the potion. "Here,"
"Thank you," I say sincerely.
"You don't have to," She tells and then turns to Snow. "All right. See you at dinner, Simon." With that Bunce leaves.
There's a minute of dead silence before Snow speaks. He's standing awkwardly by the door and I'm leaning on my desk.
"What did you keep the potion for?"
"Drink it," I command.
"What no! I'm fine" He protests.
"Drink it, please." I request.
"Do you not trust me? Or you don't want to believe I want you? You don't have to reject me like this! " Snow huffs impatiently and goes to sit on his bed.
"I-I'm - I'm not used to getting things I want. So please. Drink it and we'll talk in fifteen minutes. I need this. For me, "
"Things you want?" He says in a voice teetering on the edge of hopeful.
"Please," I insist. The less I say the better. But there must be something in my voice because Snow is convinced.
"Fine. But I'm telling you I'm going to still feel the same in fifteen minutes. Like I've been feeling for months now." with that he swallows the antidote like a shot.
I keep an eye on him for fifteen minutes, and he stays the same. His eyes stay the same. And his body language stays the same.
When the clock strike the end of fifteen minutes, he looks at me and tries to raise one eyebrow.
"How do you feel?" the distance between his bed and my desk feels too much and too less at the same time.
He stares up at me for a while, speaks nothing and the panic begins to settle in me.
"Are you going to reject me?" He sounds normal but there's a hint of doubt in his voice and it makes me ache. Foolish boy. Who am I to reject him?
"Tell me. How do you feel?"
"Same. Still want you. Like I said I would."
Relief floods through me I cross the distance and drop myself on my bed.
He's looking at me like a scared cat.
I lean forward towards him.
"C'mere" I say softly.
He's wary but he does stand up from his bed and perches on the edge of mine.
"Closer," I shift to make space for him.
He rests one folded leg on the bed and the other one dangles to the floor.
I put my hands on the back of his neck and pull his head down to rest my forehead to his and my eyes fall closed.
"You are the bane of my existence. You are the tragedy of my life. You are the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen-"
"All right. No need to insult me to tell me off. I get it - " Snow starts to pull back and he sounds hurt. I pull him back and our foreheads knock together.
"But I'll be damned if you're not the one thing I want the most in this whole damn universe,"
Snow's breath hitches.
"You - you do?" he asks in a low, soft voice.
"So much. I want you so much. I thought it was going to kill me one day,"
"Well that's a bit dramatic," he giggles and places a hand on my neck.
"Trust me it's not. Years of pining -"
"Years?" He interrupts me.
"Years." I confirm. In for a penny, in for a pound.
"How long?"
"Too long, Snow. Too long, " I don't want to scare him away with my too long obsession before we even begin.
"You'll tell me one day?" his breathe whisper on my lips as he speaks. My eyes prick behind my eyelids and I fear I'm going to start crying soon.
I manage a weak nod.
"Merlin. And I thought I was about to go mad in months," his fingers card through the hair at the nape of my neck.
"You have no idea, Snow. No idea." My voice wavers with each word.
"Baz. Why are we waiting any longer? Can you kiss me now? I've been dying for a taste of you for so long," Snow pulls at my hair and brings his mouth in alignment with mine but doesn't kiss me yet.
"Not longer than me," with that I pull his lips to mine and kiss him and kiss him and kiss him.
My first kiss.
My first kiss with the love of my life and my first kiss with anyone.
And it's everything and nothing like I've ever imagined.
I can taste the desperation in his mouth and I give it him exponentially.
We're soft and we're rough.
We're passionate and we're gentle.
We're awkward and we're confident.
We're dirty and we're pure.
We're Simon and we're Baz.
It's everything.
I have everything I've wanted since I was eleven years old on my tip of tongue and the grasp of my palms.
I don't ever want to pull away and I hope the boy in my arms never wants to pull away either.
"I'm going to marry you one day," Snow says when we pull away for oxygen. He opens his too blue eyes and locks me in place with them.
"I don't need a potion to convince me of that. One taste of your lips," he gives my lips a filthy lick with the flat of his tongue. I shudder. "And I know I want this for the rest of my life. This and more. With you. If you'll have me," He searches my face with eyes that are moving too fast.
His pupils are blown out of proportion again but I know it's not the potion this time, because he took the antidote. It's just him. Looking at me with so much adoration that his pupils need to expand in order to see me more. To cover more of me.
"Yes," I shiver. I can only agree to what he's offering me. Who am I to reject a lifetime of happiness and Snow-kisses?
"You will marry me one day?" his voice is full of hope and my eyes are full of unshed tears.
"Yes. Whatever you want. Anything you want. Anything, Snow. For you, anything." I say and a tear escapes without my permission.
"Merlin, Baz. Me too. Anything. I'm gonna take care of you forever." His eyes begin watering too.
"Forever," I say wetly and pull his body close to mine and wrap my arms around him.
"Forever," He echoes as he holds me just as tighly.
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