Chapter Text
There was a time when Haruka stood exactly like this, arm stretched in front of him, brandishing a weapon made of water. There was a time when he faced his opponent while attempted to protect someone behind him—someone who was very important to him, who supported him in a battle.
There was a time, but Haruka couldn't remember when.
Not that he could waste another minute to think about that.
Makoto placed a hand again on his shoulder, squeezing tightly. Haruka sensed something ethereal filling him up. At first, he thought it was Makoto's spiritual aura, but that didn't feel right. That something didn't radiate out of Makoto like it usually did, but it flowed like a stream, filling a part of Haruka that—without his previous realization—had been empty.
He didn't know how, but Haruka felt much stronger than before, like he could overcome anything that might come to his path.
Including the malicious water spirit before him.
His shoulder started to get damp before he felt Makoto release his weak grip off it. Makoto coughed beside him, his breaths came out rapidly as he gasped for air. “Makoto?” Haruka turned, finding his friend clutching his own neck and chest.
“Just filling his lungs with water.” The malicious water spirit answered. It was now mimicking Haruka's normal appearance, except its body was dripping wet. “Do you want to join your friend?”
Haruka's eyes widened in surprise at the sight of water pouring out from the earth and rapidly flowed around them from every direction. The garden fountain in the distance broke open with overflowing water. The water moved swiftly in the air to their direction. Haruka extended a hand, trying to control the water. To his surprise, the water kept moving on its own, refusing to surrender either in Haruka's hand or his attempt to connect spiritually to his own element. It only took seconds until both Haruka and Makoto were engulfed and trapped in a water ball.
Although unintelligible, Haruka could hear Nagisa's voice shouting from the outside. His vision caught Nagisa who took a step back and stood firm. Nagisa set both palms in front of his chest in a manner of prayer. Haruka guessed he was trying to call other wind spirits to help them.
Good thing Nagisa was okay, but Makoto, who couldn't breathe underwater, was trapped along with Haruka. In anger, Haruka swung a fist to an edge of the water ball encasing them. He couldn't penetrate it, not that it even budged.
Haruka faced Makoto beside him, anxiety starting to affect the pace of his heartbeat. Makoto was suffocating. One of his hands tightened its grip on his own neck in desperation. Flashes of his battle with Makoto and the water dragon incident came in a rush to his head, distracting him and pushing his state of mind to panic. He should do something quickly, or Makoto would drown before his very eyes.
Spirit of water, Haruka thought, concentrating and trying to ignore the nervousness and fear swirling in his gut—fear of failure and of losing Makoto. Release us.
Nothing reacted to him. Not his own spirit nor the water encasing them. Haruka felt like his own ability had been dulled as he couldn't do anything; not even controlling the water with his own hand. The only thing he could do was breathing underwater, which did no good to Makoto.
Then, he heard another shouting from Nagisa.
Out of a sudden, a blast of sharp wind tore the air, cutting through the malicious water spirit and the water ball trapping them both. The water around Haruka and Makoto burst in droplets, scattering in the air and pouring over the dry ground under them.
As they were released, Haruka and Makoto fell in loud thuds. Makoto forcefully coughed water out of his mouth and gasped to take as much air as he could.
Haruka quickly got on his feet. “Makoto!”
“Haru!” Makoto managed to say in his coughing. “Run with Nagisa.”
“I won't do that. Don't underestimate me.” Haruka snapped in annoyance. He shuddered at the presence of malice near him. Some of the water had gathered and reformed as the personified water spirit again. It was still mimicking Haruka's form, and it was now standing several steps near them. He couldn't control the water around them, but his water dagger was still in its perfect form.
Haruka clenched his fist, paid no more attention and began to charge forward with his dagger. The swing of his weapon cut the spirit's neck. Haruka cringed at the awareness that he was slaying a ghost who looked identical to himself. Having its neck cut, the ghost immediately dissolved into water, slid past Haruka, and appeared behind his back in Haruka's uninjured form.
“Hey, Makoto. Do you know how long I've been waiting?” The ghost has its back facing Haruka as it walked toward Makoto, completely ignoring Haruka's presence.
Haruka turned on his heel, stabbing his dagger right through the ghost's heart from behind its back. Instead of injuring it, Haruka's hand alarmed him that his water dagger was being absorbed by the spirit's body. His attacks didn't work the way he wanted. His heart raced and frustration barged in, opening up a space for other negative emotions to fill in. He quickly realized that he'd made himself vulnerable for the malicious spirit to affect him again. Haruka tried to pull his dagger out of its heart, but when his attempt failed, he released the dagger and saw his weapon merged in with the spirit's body and disappeared.
He stared at his empty hand. He was quickly running out of water to forge another weapon. The only water source nearby was the garden fountain, which water had strangely refused to be controlled by Haruka.
“Who are you?” Makoto carefully asked as he stood up and took a step back.
“Haruka.” The spirit answered. Its voice was brief, soft, and quiet, nearly identical to Haruka's.
“Nanase... Haruka?” Makoto paid the real Haruka a confused glance.
“No.” The spirit slowly shook its head, “Just Haruka. One and only name for me.”
“Hey.” Haruka gritted his teeth, obviously annoyed. The ghost had mimicked his form and Haruka wouldn't tolerate it for stealing his name. “Don't take my name—“
“Haru-chan.” Nagisa whispered behind him, startling Haruka with his swift and sudden appearance. He grabbed Haruka's wet shirt to pull him closer. “We should do what Mako-chan told us. He will be okay. Earth absorbs water. Remember, he's a faction leader for many reasons. He's stronger than he looks, so we have to run.”
“Run?” Haruka's eyes widened in disbelief, “And leave Makoto behind?”
“Let me rephrase that—get some help. This evil spirit is a powerful one. Your water will only strengthen it, my wind can only cut it to pieces, only for it to recover again. We need help, and Mako-chan is buying us time.” He gave a tug on Haruka's shirt, persuading him to cooperate.
Haruka cocked his head toward Makoto, finding his green eyes fixed for seconds against his. Those eyes, despite his previously authoritative voice, spoke more gently. The green shone softly under a cast of moonlight, looking at Haruka almost in a manner of begging. Nagisa was probably right. Haruka's only choice was to put faith in Makoto. He clenched his fist, but nodded.
“Hurry up.” Nagisa pulled Haruka along. Haruka's body felt so light when Nagisa did that, as if he was supported by some wind which endured about half of his weight to make him run faster.
“Trying to run away?” Something whispered close to his ear. Haruka's body tensed in surprise. He looked around, but no one was near him except Nagisa. The voice was clearly not Nagisa's. It sounded so much like his own voice—probably the evil spirit's voice. Or could it be his own water spirit? Haruka took a halt, preventing Nagisa to pull him. Haruka turned and saw a powerful stream of water flowing toward them.
Before Haruka and Nagisa could do anything, a line of large, solid roots crawled out of the ground, tangling themselves and forming a high wall before them. The roots blocked the water stream, preventing it to crash against them. Haruka felt spiritual energy kept building up within the roots, as if they were greedily absorbing the water to turn it to energy.
“See?” Nagisa exhaled in relief, “Mako-chan can handle this for now. He will be okay.” He winked at Haruka. The taller man could see drops of sweat drenching Nagisa's face. “Mako-chan is in the garden, a supportive battle environment for his element. He won't lose, but we should find someone to aid him as soon as possible.”
Earth absorbs water. It doesn't close up a possibility that earth spirit could create spiritual energy out of water element.
Haruka nodded in determination. “Makoto, wait there. We'll come back.” He said, as if Makoto could hear his quiet voice from the distance they've made. He took Nagisa's arm and rushed to the dorm building.
As they ran, Haruka contemplated at how hopeless and weak he was. He was supposed to protect Makoto, or so the voice at the back of his mind kept pressuring him. Yet it was Nagisa who saved them. Now he was running away, leaving Makoto behind with a malicious spirit who seemed to set its target on Makoto. In the end, Haruka couldn't do anything, while Makoto did protect both Haruka and Nagisa.
How pathetic was that? He was practically useless. Haruka was shuddering when the thoughts began to consume him.
“Haru-chan!” Nagisa shouted beside him, causing Haruka to snap out of his mind and almost jump in surprise. Nagisa stopped running, caught his breath, and landed a hard slap on both Haruka's cheeks with his palms. His magenta eyes fixed straight against Haruka's, his palms putting pressure on the other's cheeks. “Don't think about anything. I could feel that evil spirit has implanted unworthy thoughts in your head, and you have to kick them out, Haru-chan.”
Haruka blinked as his mind went clearer. His self-hatred drifted to void. He wasn't running away. He was getting some help. It was just another way to protect Makoto. It didn't mean he was a coward, and all he had to do was practice to become stronger. Haruka breathed a heavy sigh, closed his eyes, trying to organize his mind. A vision of water dragon summoned by his water spirit days ago flashed in his memory.
You have more potentials than you always thought.
Those were the words of his late-grandmother, spoken a long time ago—at a time Haruka could no longer remember. His rapid heartbeat began to slow its rhythm. He snapped his eyes open, facing Nagisa with a subtle smile. “Thank you... Nagisa.”
The smaller blonde grinned and nodded. Haruka lifted his hand, gently ruffling Nagisa's hair with his palm. He didn't know when exactly he'd started to develop a soft spot for Nagisa.
In a moment, Nagisa's eyes seemed to sparkle. “Hey, I know. Let's find Rei-chan. Let's come back to Mako-chan as a full team of IGS.”
“IGS.” Haruka repeated, staring blankly at Nagisa.
“Iwatobi Ghostbuster Squad. Haru-chan, how can you forget so easily?”
“Ah, sorry.” Haruka said, finding difficulties to focus. There was something else that kept bothering him ever since they were still in the garden. He thought about his inability to control the water, how his hand couldn't even take a handful of water like usual, let alone control it without physical aid. Had he started to lose his spiritual ability? Was something like that possible? Could his water spirit detach itself from Haruka and leave him forever?
“Haru-chan, you mind's drifting off again!” Nagisa warned, pulling Haruka to keep running.
“Sorry.” Haruka muttered. Now wasn't the time to think about that. He shouldn't dawdle. “Let's continue—“
“Rei-chan!” Nagisa enthusiastically exclaimed once they made a turn at the corridor, pointing to the front. “I see Rei-chan!”
Haruka followed Nagisa's pointed finger, finding Rei standing several meters away before them. Rei was facing the wall, staring at them with horrified look ghosted across his face.
“Nagisa-kun! Haruka-senpai!”
Rei's familiar voice echoed throughout the hallway. Despite his enthusiasm, Nagisa sauntered forward, smiling widely as he took his time appraising his best friend. “What are you doing there?”
“I'm sorry. I was supposed to stop Makoto-senpai from entering the garden but before I could operate my plan, Makoto-senpai saw me first. He said what I was doing was suspicious, and it was almost curfew hour. He asked me to stand facing the wall and stay here until he comes back.” Rei's hand was trembling as he explained, his fingers attached to the lower parts of his glasses frame. “It's so embarrassing that you see me like this—getting detention like an elementary schooler!” He frustratedly grabbed his blue hair and whined to the air.
Nagisa burst out laughing, but he immediately swallowed his laughter down the throat. Perhaps Nagisa sensed a kind of dark aura Haruka had unconsciously emanated behind him. He cleared his throat. “You can move now, Rei-chan. Come with us to the garden. There's an evil spirit, and Mako-chan needs our help.”
This water spirit was more dangerous than Makoto had previously assumed.
Makoto's body crashed against the rough, dry ground. He coughed, a thin stream of liquid trickled from the corner of his lips and dampened the ground. He thought it was water, but when Makoto wiped it with the back of his hand, he realized it was thicker than mere water. It was blood.
He tried to get up, but his legs betrayed him. He lost his balance and fell on his knees. Blood spilled out of the gashes on his legs. There was something wrong with him. Makoto couldn't stop trembling. His mind went hazy and unfocused. He was scared. He didn't find the strength to move his arms. They dangled uselessly at his sides. He knew he should heal himself, but he was lacking spiritual energy. This water spirit was surprisingly powerful, and it had sucked all of Makoto's spiritual energy out of his being throughout the battle. It sucked water out of his plants, the soil and the ground, until they turned dry and cracked, gradually perished.
“Are you trembling? Is that fear I sense from you? Of what? Of ghost, or death? Or probably... water?”
The water spirit appeared beside him, materializing from misty air. Its blue eyes were calm as they gazed on Makoto, just like Haruka's.
“Hey, Makoto.”
Haruka's voice whispered the name softly near his ear. It awakened a faint electricity in his body, leaving him shuddering. Makoto tilted his head slightly, uselessly trying to keep his distance.
“Makoto.” The water spirit repeated, “If you fear ghost, death, and water, I know the perfect way to your funeral.” Its hand landed on Makoto's olive-brown hair, fingers running through the soft strands of it, playfully twirling a strand. “Look up.”
Makoto half-consciously obeyed him, lifting his gaze slowly to the open air.
A huge water dragon was in front of him, its head baring sharp fangs inches away from Makoto. Its body made up a great length, encircling them and covering Makoto's vision to look further behind the dragon. The size of its mouth could swallow him whole. It was a water dragon identical to the one Haruka had summoned a while ago in Spiritual Combat class. Makoto's mouth slightly parted, life dimmed in his green eyes.
“Perfect, isn't it? Fear not.” Haruka, or the water spirit, left its fingers off the strands of his hair and moved it to lift Makoto's chin a little, forcing his head to tilt and face Haruka. “It won't kill you now. I've been waiting for so long—too long to waste your life now. How many years have passed, I wonder? I do not know time. Time keeps coming, yet it keeps leaving you behind. Time changes and kills many things, but I like you, because you don't change with each passing of time. I really like that.”
“I don't understand.” Makoto could only manage a weak voice that swiftly wavered in the stillness of air. “I don't know.” The water spirit kept acting like it had known Makoto for long. Makoto didn't have the slightest clue or memory of this water spirit that looked like Haruka.
The fingers that grabbed his chin felt cold and surreal, almost like a touch of nightmare that it sent chills down his spine. At the same time, the fingers were solid. It left uncomfortable sensation from his chin, down his throat, to his chest and fell to the stomach.
“Haru.”
It sounded like Makoto's voice, except the name didn't roll off from his tongue. From the corner of his eye, Makoto sensed another spirit. This time, the feeling was oddly familiar. It was unmistakably an earth spirit, and it was approaching them. Haruka hadn't released his fingers off Makoto, but its attention had shifted toward the source of the voice.
Makoto could see his own self, penetrating through the water dragon and made its way safely in front of them. “Let's go back, Haru.” The earth spirit said in Makoto's voice. The same like the water spirit which had mimicked Haruka's form, this earth spirit had taken Makoto's appearance.
“Makoto.” The water spirit finally released him.
“He's weak.” The earth spirit stated, with a gentle smile and soft gaze of his droopy forest green eyes. “He's still too weak for you right now. You're being cruel, Haru-chan. There's no point in fighting him. Let's just go.” It chuckled, extending a hand.
“Drop the '-chan'.” Haruka said, taking the other's hand. It turned to Makoto, eyes shimmering in ocean blue shade as moonlight fell on them. “See you again, Makoto. Next time, we'll probably kill you against our will.”
Both spirits vanished into thin air in front of Makoto's eyes. The water dragon had moved to the sky and began to crumble, slowly falling apart all over the garden as gentle rain.
Makoto was still kneeling in the same position, feeling numb on his entire body. His gaze drifted away to nowhere in particular, barely taking any sight of death all around him. From the blurry vision he could see the dead trees, cracked ground, dry brownish flowers.
The entire garden was dead within a short period of time. Makoto couldn't protect the once living beings that had livened up his days and nights, sent him sweet fresh breeze, comforted him with their presence. He had lost his safe haven. They were dead, but Makoto was alive.
There was a wild flower beside him.
Makoto's head tilted to the side, staring at the wild flower. A dandelion, once full of color with beautiful florets, now pale and wrinkled that it could easily crushed with the tips of gentlest touch. Makoto forced himself to shift, his fingers from both hands dug through the cracked damp ground surrounding the flower. Makoto carefully lifted the flower with its roots still planted in the earth within his palms.
“...I'm sorry.” He whispered, voice barely audible. Not that anyone would ever hear him. He watched raindrops landed over its dead petals and florets, too late to bring it back to life. “...'m sorry.” He repeated, half his words stuck in his throat. He looked around the dead surrounding.
There was insignificant warmth rolling down the skin of his cheeks. Maybe they were raindrops, from the warm water sucked out of the plants. Maybe they were tears. He couldn't tell as his senses had been dull.
From a distance, Makoto heard voices calling his name.
“Makoto!”
“Mako-chan!”
“Makoto-senpai!”
He returned the dandelion back to its place. It didn't take long until hasty footsteps were heard and human bodies began to surround him. Haruka's hands grabbed his arms. They were all calling his name, speaking things he couldn't decipher. The voices confused him. They rang in his ears, hurting his head. His vision blurred even more, darkness was lurking at the corner before it showed up and took over his vision.
The first thing that took Haruka's attention was the gentle rain.
Then, once they made their way outside, they stopped short, shocked at the sight of dry, lifeless garden, like it had been long abandoned and being left to perish.
But one sight that filled him most with dread was one of Makoto, kneeling on the dry ground, bleeding, holding a dead flower. In that split moment, Haruka regretted his decision to put faith in Makoto. He regretted his decision to run away. He shouldn't run, he should have fought alongside Makoto from beginning to end, supporting and protecting him. Whatever the outcome, Haruka would at least be free of guilt that was building up and crashing down within his chest right now.
They all called his name, rushing to his sides. Along with rain water, blood was oozing out of the gashes on Makoto's legs and arms. He coughed blood, eyelashes fluttered to close. Haruka could hardly see the green of Makoto's irises, not the lively and cheerful, nor the gentle vibes on them. They were dull, lacking energy and sense of life. Haruka's breath caught up on his throat, but then he let out a small sigh of relief when he could still sense Makoto's elemental spirits emanating from him, although the aura was weak, but it was there. At least Makoto was alive.
However, not even a single drop of spiritual energy was left in him.
How could that be? What kind of monster he'd fought, that it could suck dry the garden, injuring Makoto, and took out all of Makoto's spiritual energy? Probably they had all underestimated the malicious water spirit. Haruka felt nausea in his gut. How could he leave Makoto alone with such monster?
“Makoto-senpai!” Rei called, lightly slapping his cheek to rouse him back to consciousness. “No good. He fainted.”
“Why didn't Mako-chan heal himself?” Nagisa asked in panic, trying to stop the bleeding on Makoto's leg with his vest.
“He couldn't.” Haruka answered with trembling voice, but he didn't realize it. “There's no spiritual energy left in him. Nagisa, Rei. Help me take Makoto to the infirmary.”
As they tried to hold Makoto and carefully take him inside, Haruka wasn't even aware that the rain had stopped. It could no longer hold his attention the moment Haruka laid eyes on Makoto.
“These gashes were probably caused by dry plants, like rough pieces of tree barks.” Rei recalled, fixing his red glasses on his eyes. “That's what the doctor has told me.”
“Mako-chan got hurt by plants? I thought he's immune.” Nagisa stood beside the infirmary bed where Makoto was lying onto. He was still unconscious, but the doctor had convinced the three panicking students that their faction leader would be okay.
“Nagisa-kun, the plants didn't matter in this case. The tips of dry tree barks can be sharp, and that sharpness caused injuries.” Rei answered as he yawned. He looked tired and sleepy. They had lost track of time, but Haruka was pretty sure it was already late. Probably midnight. Curfew hour was their last concern, so nobody bothered to ask or even paid attention.
“It's strange.” Haruka finally said. He was quiet the whole time, but even the doctor noticed that Haruka was actually a hurricane behind the layers of his calm demeanor. She kept saying that Makoto would be okay, and most of the time, they were especially directed toward Haruka. “How did a water spirit injure Makoto with materials of his own element? I mean, the water spirit shouldn't be able to control plants.”
“Maybe it could control the plants, with water.” Nagisa's arms folded in front of his chest.
“Should we even mention that garden? It was barren within minutes. I think the first thing that water spirit did was absorbing all the water from every source as well as Makoto-senpai's spiritual energy. When Makoto-senpai became defenseless, it shouldn't be hard to injure him with anything. Remember when we found him? He seemed to be in shock, barely recognizing our presence. That alone made him vulnerable.” Rei sighed, glancing toward Haruka.
Haruka looked away, his thoughts entangled in disarray. Could his water spirit also do something dangerous like that? Did that mean his presence might be dangerous for Makoto? He'd injured Makoto once in class. Makoto referred that as normal, it was an accident. But how many more 'accidents' would Haruka cause?
“I think things like this can only happen with water and earth spirits, huh? I didn't realize that until now.” Nagisa stared down at his fidgeting fingers. “Absorbing one another's element. Sucking them dry or giving them life, supporting or destroying.”
Haruka thought about that brief moment when Makoto placed a hand on his shoulder, transferring his spiritual energy. He wondered what kind of energy Makoto gave him. Whatever it was, it made Haruka felt stronger than ever. Yet in the end, Haruka didn't accomplish anything.
“Can I do the same?” He asked, gulping. “Like... transferring spiritual energy for Makoto?” Haruka hesitated before gently taking Makoto's limp hand, lifting it up and wrapped it with both his palms. Haruka closed his eyes, concentrating. He just begged to whichever spirit that wanted to hear and help him transfer his spiritual energy.
The spirits responded with nothing. Haruka didn't feel any spiritual energy coming out of his hand, either. Disappointment soon replaced a fragile hope.
“Not possible.” Rei answered, “Well, you can, with water. You give water to Makoto-senpai, and he'll use a little energy to absorb that water from you and turn it into spiritual energy. But transferring it just like that, by touching, I don't think that's possible.”
“But Makoto did that to me.” Haruka said, immediately seizing attentions from both his juniors. “He did that to me when we faced that evil spirit together.”
“...How?” Nagisa blinked, trying to recall the event.
“He put a hand on my shoulder.” Haruka muttered, “Then I was filled with spiritual energy.”
Silence took over the air, leaving stillness in the atmosphere. Nagisa was the first one to break the silence. “...What?”
“That kind of thing is illogical.” Rei shook his head, “No. that's not possible, unless...”
“...unless, you and Mako-chan are... that.” Nagisa gave a tug on Haruka's shirt.
“But such things no longer exist, Nagisa-kun.” Rei slapped a hand on Nagisa's shoulder.
“Who said it doesn't exist anymore?” Nagisa countered, “Haru-chan, I think you and Mako-chan may be soulmates.”
Haruka's blue eyes were blank, full of silent questions, but none of them made their way out of his mouth. He'd heard about soulmates, in books or on TV. The term 'soulmates' was well associated with romantic love, something Haruka didn't and probably wouldn't ever have. He'd heard couples saying they're soulmates, or singles saying they hadn't met their soulmate yet.
“It's stupid.” Haruka finally voiced out an opinion.
“It's not stupid. It's dangerous.” Nagisa said, suddenly turning serious. “Do you even know what soulmates are?”
Haruka raised an eyebrow, seemingly confused. He kept staring at Nagisa, waiting for the smaller blonde to explain. This reaction was not expected by either Nagisa or Rei. The juniors took a glance at each other with mouth parted open, their eyes widening in disbelief. Almost simultaneously, they both turned to Haruka.
“Soulmates are,” Rei cleared his throat before continuing, “literally half part of your soul. I have zero knowledge about the definition of soulmates in your previous world, Haruka-senpai, but please allow me to explain. In this world of the spirits, soulmates are two souls, halves of each other, one whole. Usually they are two souls who are the vessels of two different spirits. The spirits of soulmates never contradict, they are often heavily related and can support each other. Like your water spirit and Makoto-senpai's earth spirit.
“Then, what's special about soulmates is they can merge their spirits. They can also instantly and conveniently transfer spiritual energy to each other. Soulmates made double spirits. You may think of Seijuuro-senpai, but he's different. Seijuuro-senpai's spirits are a powerful one and a weaker one. A sun spirit and spirit wolf. Each spirit can't reach its fullest potential because both spirits only have one limited vessel, which is Seijuuro-senpai's soul. Soulmates, however, have two vessels, each may contain a powerful spirit. These two souls, when they are met, may become one as a third vessel, which can contain two spirits merged in their fullest potential. In the past, soulmates are sometimes legally killed because they're considered deadly.”
“Don't worry about the last part,” Nagisa said, “if you and Mako-chan are indeed soulmates, we promise to zip our lips.” He made a gesture of pressing his thumb and index finger together, gliding them over his lips.
“It's a thing of a legend.” Rei explained, “Most students here believe soulmates don't exist anymore. They're just a story. Other theory convinced us that all soulmates were wiped clear in the past. I didn't believe soulmates exist, until... I consider to believe it's true, based on what you've told me about Makoto-senpai transferring his spiritual energy by touch.”
“So that means Haru-chan and Mako-chan are legendary souls! So cool!”
“Nagisa-kun! Don't shout, somebody may hear you!” Rei pressed a finger on his lips, gesturing Nagisa to keep quiet. “You're unbelievable. I think we should go back to our room now. It's already late.”
Nagisa let out an incomprehensible murmur of protest, but relented when Rei pulled his arm. “You too, Haruka-senpai. Let's go to our room. The later we go back, more of our points will get reduced.”
“You go.” Haruka said quietly, careful not to wake Makoto up. “I'll stay here.”
“Haruka-senpai.” Rei kept silent for a moment before he nodded. “Okay.”
Even after Rei and Nagisa had left the infirmary, Haruka's palms were still holding Makoto's warm hand. He thought about the time when Makoto was singing in the gazebo and staying together with him throughout the night. How Haruka felt like half-filled glass. Makoto's presence was like water, ready to pour over that glass and fulfill him. His presence was like a discovery of a missing puzzle piece that hadn't been placed in its position. Haruka remembered those times when he felt strangely empty and couldn't figure out what he was missing.
Then, the words he heard yesterday from his own water spirit in the art class, right after he'd finished a painting of Makoto's portrait.
Is he not a part of your soul?
Suddenly, everything clicked, falling together into place.
If Rei's story about soulmates is true, then Makoto might be his soulmate. He was a missing part of Haruka's soul—that his existence made him feel strange. Empty, yet ready to be fulfilled.
Isn't it too late for you to realize that now?
Haruka unconsciously drew a sharp breath. It was his water spirit again, its voice filled his head. “You've known all this time, but you didn't tell me.” Haruka whispered, soft enough to not be heard by anyone nearby. They might not be alone in this place. Maybe there was a wandering spirit, maybe the doctor was still staying here somewhere, eavesdropping them. Haruka strangely couldn't feel safe in this infirmary.
This matter is something you have to figure out on your own, his water spirit said.
Before Haruka could reply, he felt Makoto's body shifted. Haruka let go of his hand, placing it carefully beside Makoto. He saw the other's eyelashes fluttered until they opened the green eyes hidden under them. Those eyes were only half opened, looking around to identify the surroundings. When they met Haruka's gaze, Makoto blinked, trying to refocus his vision.
“Haru...?”
Haruka nodded and whispered, “It's me...” He paused, then continued, “Nanase Haruka.” He tried to convince Makoto, worrying if Makoto would think of him as the evil spirit that had stolen both his name and his form.
“Are you okay...?” Makoto asked, forcing himself to get up. Haruka caught his arms, preventing him to move and pushing him back to lie down. “Where's Nagisa... and Rei? Are they okay, too? Rei—I left him—“
“They're fine. I'm fine. You should rest, Makoto.” Haruka cut his words, then bit his lip. That should be Haruka's line, but Makoto was still worrying about others—about Haruka and Nagisa who had run away, about Rei who was left standing in the hallway. He wasn't worried about himself, who was badly injured. Haruka tried to suppress his annoyance. Inhaling a deeper breath, he attempted to push Makoto to lie down again, this time more gently. Makoto gave in.
“I'm sorry, Haru.”
What for? For protecting me and Nagisa? You're talking nonsense.
Haruka didn't let a single word slip out of his mouth, swallowing them back along with a tint of anger. Anger at Makoto and his own self.
What happened? Haruka wanted to ask, but never let his tongue craft the question. He knew what happened. Makoto was injured and defeated. The garden was sucked dry. The evil spirit vanished somewhere. He didn't have the heart to squeeze more information out of Makoto. When they found him, Makoto was kneeling there, face pale, his eyes lacking their usual shine. Whatever had happened, it was shocking for Makoto. It was probably a traumatizing experience, and the last thing Haruka wanted was for Makoto to recall the event again to tell him what has happened.
“I'm sorry.” Makoto repeated. Haruka could almost hear his own heart ripping.
“What for?” The question slipped without Haruka's careful control.
“For being scared.” Makoto was trembling a little, but soon his body calmed down.
“Stupid... Makoto.” Haruka couldn't help saying it, feeling his body shaking. “Stupid...”
Of course you were scared. It's only normal.
“I was scared...” Makoto covered his face with his shaky palm, “of water.”
Haruka didn't expect that. He stared at Makoto, waiting for more explanation. Yet, Makoto didn't say anything more. Makoto's palm slid down his face and he lightly shook his head. Then he turned to face Haruka, smiling amiably.
“Forget what I've just said. Thank you for saving me, Haru.”
I didn't save you. You saved me. I didn't do anything.
“That water spirit... it was really powerful. I was surprised.” Makoto began, his hand rubbing one of his injured arms. Blood oozed out of his wounds, dampening the bandage that had been wrapped around his arms. The smile began to leave his face. Haruka noticed the small change on Makoto's expression. Maybe he could ask Makoto for details later, but now he should alter the conversation elsewhere.
“Makoto,” Haruka called. “Back then, I couldn't control the water.” He admitted, “It was like I had lost the ability to shape them with my own hands. Do you... know why...?” He knew he'd picked a wrong topic, as it was still related to the incident, but at least it gained Makoto's attention and brought a bit of light into his dull eyes. Yet, with each spoken word, anxiety grew deeper in Haruka.
Back then, when Haruka still lived in the other world, he'd wanted to lose his ability. He counted his water spirit as a curse rather than a blessing. But now everything had changed. He was glad to possess the water spirit. He couldn't pinpoint when this new feeling of gratefulness had replaced his previous hatred toward his own ability. Now the idea of losing his ability haunted him. His water spirit had just spoken to him, but he couldn't stop worrying about what had happened back then when it refused to function.
Makoto's gaze fell upon Haruka's hand, which had formed a fist. It was shaking, probably out of insecurity and frustration. Makoto's bigger hand raised up, gently covering his fist. The edge of his thumb caressed Haruka's clenched fingers. The gesture was small and subtle, but Haruka finally loosened up, feeling soothed.
“You don't need to worry.” Makoto curved a warm smile, “That means the water had been controlled by that evil spirit. I can explain more, if you want. There are several kinds of spirits. Some powerful ones are contagious. These certain kinds have the ability to affect their surrounding, persuading the neutral spirits to follow their way. Which means,” Makoto carefully released Haruka's hand, which had stopped shaking, “some evil spirits can turn neutral spirits to evil, and good spirits can turn the neutral into good.”
“Does that mean...” Haruka stopped, followed by a nod from Makoto. The brunet seemed to have guessed what Haruka was concerned about.
“The water refused to be controlled by you, because they've been controlled by another spirits, either that water spirit who looked like you, or another spirits which had been turned evil. That way, you couldn't control any water that was previously out of your grasp. Maybe you couldn't even connect to the other spirits.”
“So it's not because my ability has been dulled.” Haruka said.
Makoto nodded. “I'm not sure if this is a good news or a bad one for you. But the spirit inside you, which has already been there ever since your birth, won't ever leave your body until you die.”
“I see.” Haruka said, relieved. He was glad—so glad. For Haruka, it was definitely good news. Haruka knew that Makoto had realized this, because his smile widened. Haruka looked away, trying to hide the small blush on his cheek. There were so many questions piling up in his head. He wanted to ask Makoto if he knew about soulmates, if he was aware that Haruka might be his soulmate. He wanted to know if the rumor about sky spirit was true, if Makoto also knew about that. He was curious about the presence of that evil spirit. Why the spirit was targeting Makoto, and why there was an evil spirit in an area that was supposed to be safe.
He wondered if the Tree of Protection had lost its power or had been corrupted.
But that night, he decided not to express his selfish thirst for information. They talked about many things, sharing some stories. None of them mentioned about the dead garden, the sky spirit, or the evil water spirit, or anything that had been revealed tonight. They kept their conversation light. Haruka refused to go back to his room, and Makoto learned how stubborn Haruka could be. At the same time, Haruka learned how manipulative Makoto could be if he wanted to. Haruka was unfazed about the consequences of his points being cut, but when Makoto mentioned about him being restricted to ever visit the pool, Haruka was ready to give up and leave the room.
Makoto stopped him, saying that it was okay for tonight if Haruka wanted to stay. So Haruka stayed, taking another vacant bed beside Makoto. Haruka kept an eye on Makoto after the brunet had fallen asleep.
Before he was too sleepy, Haruka meditated for half an hour until it was raining.
He watched the water drops roll against the glass window, hoping that the rain he'd summoned could at least save a life in the dead garden. At least a life that might have been left unnoticed, but not yet perished.