Chapter Text
The sun was high in the blue sky, and the breeze that carried the scent of flowers, felt soft on Dan’s skin. He was holding his grandmother’s hand as they watched the trees sway and the children play in the water. All around them were people sunbathing on the grass, chatting, or sharing a pic-nic. They were probably friends, families, and couples, spending a sweet privileged moment with their loved ones.
The return of the sun had seemingly made everyone happier today. It was a beautiful spring day.
His granny, who had been staying at Heesung’s place with him for the last three days, had wanted to come here today. It wasn’t just any place, it was the park they always went to together, once. She would lay sheets on the grass, take food out and they would chat happily over a meal, then they would both submerge themselves in their books, before eating a little dessert and ultimately going home.
It was simple, yet so special. And Dan was grateful he could share this with her, one last time.
Even if it was tearing his heart into pieces.
“Granny.” He said, his voice shaky.
“Yes, my puppy?” She encouraged him, her voice a barely audible whisper as her frail fingers tried to squeeze his hand.
“I hope you don’t have any regrets. You sacrificed a lot to take care of me.” He started. “I know our life wasn’t easy, but to me, If I had to do it all over again, just to be with you, I would. “
A tear rolled down his face as he said this, and his grandma looked at him tenderly.
“I have no regrets.” She said, a broad smile on her lips. “Having the honour of seeing you grow into the wonderful man that you are, is more than I could have ever hoped for.”
Dan did not add anything to that, he didn’t have the strength. Love was both a wonderful blessing and a terrible curse. To be loved by her had been the greatest joy of his life, but to have it taken away, it was a pain like he had never known before.
They went home to a delicious supper prepared by Yoongu and Heesung. Then they looked at photo albums all together. A special moment he was happy to share with his friends. Not only were they wonderful to his grandmother, but they had managed to make her days here fun, even making her laugh.
On her first day here, she had been giddy to recognise the actor from that show she and Dan used to watch together, and after telling him a hundred times that she had loved him in it, he had reenacted some of her favourite scenes, enrolling the help of a very flustered Yoongu. This had set the tone for what had been a wonderful stay.
And as they went to sleep that night, Dan knew he was telling his grandma good night for the last time.
He kissed her forehead and held her hand to sleep, he watched her for what seemed like hours. Trying to fight back for as long as he could his own body, because falling asleep meant seeing her for the last time.
She had held on long enough to make sure he was doing okay, to be sure he was ready to let go, and now she deserved her rest.
However, knowing what was to come didn’t make it any easier, when he woke up next morning and found her once warm hands, cold.
He sobbed quietly for a long time, a part of him devastated, and another, relieved. Now, she was free from the pain. A silver lining he desperately held onto, to keep going.
The next few days, Dan was in a daze, he felt numb and apart from moments where he cried or laughed at the good memories, he was lethargic. Thankfully he didn’t have to take care of the funeral arrangements, his friends took charge of everything, letting him grief in peace. They held a ceremony full of colours, in her honour. Dressing their suits with her favourite flowers as they led her to rest. It got them looks from people at the funeral home, but Dan didn’t care. This was what she would have wanted. She had suffered, stuck in a hospital room for the last months of her life, she deserved to have a flamboyant farewell. A last celebration of her life. That’s what Dan needed to do.
He received words of condolences from the coaches, and athletes of Team black, as well as some of his regular clients. A touching gesture, he greatly appreciated.
And among the flowers sent, was a beautiful bouquet of lotus flowers. It had no card, no name, but Dan knew who they were from. How could he tell? It was hard to explain, but he knew.
He could have thrown the flowers away, but this wasn’t about him. It was about his grandma, and since Jaekyung had made her smile in her times of pain, he could allow this one gesture.
The rest of the week went by really fast, he decided not to take more than four days off, in order to not dwell on his grandmother’s passing. But still, he alleviated his workload, in order not to burn himself out.
Some moments were fine, and he was able to share fond memories of his grandmother with Yoongu and Heesung, and others he just curled up in a ball and cried. In those times his friends would comfort him. Heesung would usually pat his back and offer kind words, while Yoongu would give him silent bone crushing hugs.
All his life, he had been scared of that moment, the one where his one and only family would be gone forever. He had always imagined he would be alone then. But surprisingly, he wasn’t, whether he truly deserved their affection or not, the fact was: he had two amazing friends to rely on.
Two people with opposing ways of showing their love, and yet its very core was reminiscent of the affection he’d gotten from his grandma.
It felt good learning again that physical touch didn’t have to be so scary and painful, it could be sweet, full of affection, even if platonic. Dan was sad, maybe even devastated by the loss of his grandma, but he didn’t feel alone and he knew he was loved.
And for the first time in his life, instead of feeling guilty and stressing about how he would repay his friends for their kindness, he let himself be.
Because he knew that both Heesung and Yoongu were being genuine, that they weren’t trying to get anything out of him. He knew because that was how he felt about them too. Wanting to be there, to help, to comfort, to share, because loving someone means wanting to do everything you can to make them happy. And in turn, that makes you happy too.