Chapter Text
I ran the brush through my hair absentmindedly, trying to smooth down my ponytails. Something messy but not to messy, just enough to make it look intentional. Though did it really matter in the end?
I was supposed to go out today on a shopping trip. It was supposed to be a distraction from everything going on, a little self care trip as Daddy and Auntie said. They told me that treating themselves always made them feel better, and that I should be treated to as well. Though the thought didn’t make me feel better at all. I could hardly still look in the mirror, so going out wasn’t exactly the thing I wanted to do. But Daddy insisted I needed to get out of my room, so I guess I didn’t really have a choice.
“Pumpkin!” I turned my head to look to my door, hearing my Dad’s voice behind it. He opened the door, peeking his head in and looking in. “Ya about ready? We’re gonna head out.”
I
“Yeah, just need to get my backpack.” Daddy had bought me one of those cute small backpacks for going out, he said it would be good for carrying my own stuff in. I slipped it on and trotted up to him.
“I’m ready.”
“Then let’s go!’
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It was the same shopping complex we had been to when I met Cherri. The same shops, the same fountain. But it was a bit busier than it was last time. The thought made me wanna curl up and hide.
More people meant more eyes on me.
Even if people were to busy chatting with friends and looking at their phones to care, it still felt like everyone was staring at me. Talking about me behind my back, about how I looked weird and freaky compared to everyone else.
I didn’t even feel complete. I wasn’t human, I wasn’t demon; I was in between. At least if I were a demon, people wouldn’t look weird at me. I didn’t like the thought of being one, but I least I could blend in better than I was now.
“Hey pumpkin, look! It’s that shop ya like! Tha one with all tha pretty dresses and frills ya like!”
Daddy’s voice blared above the crowd, his hand on my back to get my attention. The grin on his face was wide, showing his teeth as he pointed to the shop just across from us.
He was dressed nice today, all in sparkles and flashy boots. He looked like how you would expect older ladies to go out to clubs when they wanted to party. But Daddy always said that you should dress how you want, and not how others wanted you too.
I looked to the direction that he was pointing, feeling unsure about the whole thing. They were pretty but… they also stood out more. I didn’t want to stand out to much, at least not right now. It wasn’t something I was comfy with, and there was a lotta people in that store last time.
“Um….I dunno….” I mumbled, fidgeting with my hands, looking down at my feet.
“Hey Angie, I gotta place.” Auntie Cherri’s voice rang out, gaining both of our attention. She was dressed up too, at least to her style. All decked out in ripped denim and chains. She was someone people would’ve been scared of in my old town. Yet I knew better, she was a nice lady.
“Howabout that store on the right side towards the back? That might be somethin’ thet fits em’”. Daddy made a face, glancing back to me before looking at her again.
“I dunno Cherri… ain’t that a bit.. To much for their age?”
She scoffed, making a dismissive wave with her hand and barking out a laugh.
“Don’t act like you weren’t doin’ worst shit at their age! C’mon! A lil spikes ain’t gonna hurt em, it’s fun! Don’t ya trust your Auntie?” she leaned over, looking to me with a big grin. I couldn’t help but giggle just a little bit. Her spunky and fiery attitude always helped to lift people’s spirits. It was infectious.
I heard Daddy sigh as he looked back down to me.
“Whadda you think, hun? Ya wanna try it?”
I nodded.
“Mhm uh….I-I think so yeah. I wanna try it.”
“What could go wrong? Can’t be that bad!”
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“I told ya this was a bad idea! The poor thing’s cryin’! Look at em’!”
“Oooh they’re fiiine. It was just a bit of a pinch! Right, Chance?”
I sniffled, taking a bite of the burger on my plate. It was yummy, really yummy. It made the dull ache and phantom feeling from the piercing feel not as bad.
I looked up to see the two, only to be met with guilty expressions. Aunty Cherri’s confident smile slipped away into something more awkward. I saw my dad’s face give a quick look before it turned into a wide smile back at me.
“It’s okay, sweetheart, it’s ova’ now. Is ya food good?”
“Mhm.” My mouth was full of food, but I wanted to respond anyways. It would be rude if I didn’t respond.
They had brought me to that diner I really liked after. The earrings were pretty, but it hurt a lot and was still real scary. So food was the go to comfort and calming method they chose. It was worth it though. I liked the food here. It was that typical greasy diner food that sold the good fries and burgers and milkshakes, so it always put me in a better mood.
Focusing on eating really was helping to calm my mind. The textures, tastes and scents made it happy. Made me happy.
Plus, I didn’t have to stand up and walk around anymore. So that was nice.
The bags from stuff we had bought before were on the chairs with us. We had picked one of those big booths, upon aunty Cherri’s request. Said she needed more room for her legs or something like that. I didn’t really mind as long as I could sit near the wall.
We didn’t get as much as I would’ve thought. I didn’t pick out to much. Only a few accessories and a single t-shirt that I really liked. I just wasn’t that in the mood to pick anything out.
But what surprised me was how little Aunty and Daddy picked out. Usually they would go all out with buying things they liked, but they actually didn’t get that much this time.
Maybe it was because they felt bad?
I didn’t know.
I mainly just sat there, eating and thinking. Watching the two adults talk and bicker, and sometimes laugh, as I ate. I wasn’t really taking in what they were saying, to be honest. Sometimes I would pick up on words, but the rest of it sounded all muffled and hazy.
“How ya feelin’, baby?”
The comforting and heavily accented voice snapped me out of my thinking. He was looking at me, and had a soft smile on his face. It was the one that made me feel like things were okay.
“Um… okay… better.” I mumbled, not totally in the mood for talking full right now.
My food was almost gone. Guess I eat a lot faster than I thought. Or maybe they had been talking longer than I thought. I don’t really know.
“Ya don’t look as down anymore. Did today help cheer ya up?”
Oh yeah, I was super upset today before.
I was still upset, but not really about the thing before.
The thing before being the whole feeling icky about my body thing. My ears were different, and things like horns had started to grow out of my head. It was a lot to handle, and I hated change. It made me feel like I wanted to throw up.
Everything had been so much.
But I realized, I hadn’t been thinking about that. Least not until after the whole earring thing and some shopping.
Sure I still felt icky, but it was cause of the whole pain and earring thing. Who wouldn’t feel icky after getting your ears stabbed?
It would be weird if you didn’t.
But I felt….Better. Not as gross when I thought about it. Sure it felt…uncomfortable. But I felt a little less uncomfortable with it all.
Things felt normal and good right now, and I liked that.