Chapter Text
Boston was truly something special, and James only realized this after a year of living in the city. The first two semesters of college passed very quickly. He had received a sports scholarship to attend and, although he didn’t have all his friends with him, it turned out that Mary was also attending, albeit for a different program, but they were both at Harvard. It was easier to adjust to the new place with a friend by his side. Together, they explored the city and met new people, spending long weekends visiting friends scattered across different cities and states.
James was incredibly proud of all of them. Remus and Lily got into medical school, exactly where they wanted, and Sirius suddenly decided he dreamed of New York. Potter was almost certain that it was the tall brunet there who attracted him more than the city itself. Peter wanted to go to the University of California, so the blonde visited him most often by plane. Marlene and Dorcas decided to take a gap year and travel around Europe. Sometimes they sent postcards from the most different countries.
His life probably couldn’t be going any better. In Boston, he already had friends, people close to him, and others he cared less about. He studied enough to pass all his exams with only one retake, attended training sessions in the afternoons, and occasionally had time to go to the skatepark. It was a bit boring on his own, but he eventually found friends there too.
He didn’t think about high school as much anymore. He missed the practices with the first team and the times when football was more of a passion than an obligation, but he understood that it was just the way things went. He had found his place at Harvard, and it didn’t take long for him to start noticing some positives in how his life was currently unfolding.
The semester started a few days ago, and now he was sitting in an incredibly boring lecture. He was texting Mary, who wasn’t replying, so her classes must be more interesting. He glanced around the room where other students were also doing something on their phones or studying their notes, probably for a different subject. James didn’t even think today’s topic was boring. It was more likely the fault of the professor, who spoke as though he regretted every decision that led him to this point.
The lecture was held in a large hall, and a few rows below James spotted Hestia Jones. She was the third person from Boston who might want more from him than just some casual flirting and a few exchanged kisses at a party. He thought she was sweet, always knew what to say, was definitely confident, and it didn’t take long to notice how empathetic she was. The problem might be with him, because even though a year had passed, he still looked for those one blue irises in every pair of eyes and all the sarcastic comments and nasty remarks that a certain person had once thrown his way.
It had been a year, and it was stupid that he still thought about that kiss in Regulus’ room. It had felt like the most real thing that had ever happened in his life, and Black had told him it didn’t mean anything. They hadn’t spoken since then. Regulus had clearly wanted to, but James had run away every time he tried. He felt humiliated enough because Reg had surely realized that, for him, that evening had meant everything.
The lecture finally ended, and the professor bid the students farewell. James quickly spotted the brunette, who seemed surprised, almost as if she hadn’t expected to show up at the first lecture with her dreaded professor.
“Hey. You look nice. That color suits you,” he complimented her turquoise dress, and she sent him a smile. “I was thinking maybe you’d want to grab a coffee or something tomorrow? It’s been a while,” he suggested. He didn’t even know why. He wasn’t trying to give Hestia any hopes of anything, but he still considered her a good friend. Maybe, if he got close enough, he’d feel something and finally forget about his hopeless crush on Regulus Black.
“Hey, James. I’d love to go out somewhere with you. I’m in a rush for swimming class now, but we can talk later on the phone?” She nodded and waved to him before disappearing around the corner.
His classes were over for the day, so he put his headphones on to avoid the complete silence on the way back to the dorm. He pushed his way through crowds of students when suddenly he felt a hand on his forearm. He frowned, irritated, because someone wanted to stop him when he was eager to just get to his room and prepare for training. He turned around, furrowing his brows, when the man in front of him was breathing heavily, as if he had just run a few kilometers. Then he raised his head, and James froze for a few seconds.
He should have recognized that slight frame and dark curls, though they were a bit longer now. He scanned the guy. His sharp facial features, almost black hair, and limbs slightly too long for his height. He refused to look into his eyes. Ironically, that coldest shade of blue always made James feel a little warmer.
“James,” the guy simply said, but now there was anger in James. Of all the universities in the States, he had to pick this one?
“What are you doing here? Did Sirius tell you where I study? Are you some kind of stalker or what?!” He didn’t know if Regulus had stopped hiding it or if it was easier for him to notice now, but he saw the hurt in his face. He had no remorse, though. He had spent all this time trying to forget about him, and maybe now, when he was slowly starting to prefer warm brown over cold blue, Reg showed up again.
“No… fuck. Sirius didn’t tell me anything. We don’t talk much because my parents are still furious he didn’t go to Harvard,” he explained quickly. His voice sounded sad. James didn’t want to think that he was the reason for it.
“Ah, so that’s why you’re here? Still meeting other people’s expectations and never doing something that’s true to yourself?” James mocked, and Regulus seemed to know exactly what he was talking about. “At least your parents managed to send one son to the place they dreamed of.”
“You say that as if you weren’t studying here yourself,” Regulus replied, and there was an accusation in it, but it was much more uncertain than usual. Regulus looked embarrassed, and James felt pleased that, for once, he was the one laying down the cards and playing by his rules.
“The difference is that I wanted to be here, and you’re doing what they told you. You’re too afraid to fight for what’s yours, Reg. You’ve always been like that,” James dared to look him in the eyes this time and almost lost it. He almost softened and tried to understand what was going through Regulus’ head. But this time, James was the stronger one. “Good luck with your studies, or whatever,” he said before walking away, his mind in turmoil, a turmoil that shouldn’t have been there.
The way to the dorm passed quickly, mostly because he had a lot to think about. He even forgot about the headphones, which were now around his neck. This definitely wouldn’t be the last time he’d cross paths with Regulus in the Harvard hallways, and he didn’t know how he’d endure it. Ignoring the guy had always been difficult, and even though a whole year had passed, it turned out nothing had changed in that regard.
He wondered if he had treated him too coldly. He regretted letting emotions take over again. He had seen the hurt in the other boy’s eyes and hated himself for being the one who caused it. But he didn’t regret what he had said. Maybe he was to blame for falling for Regulus after that kiss at the party, but Regulus had played with his feelings, kissing him again, completely without reason.
From the guy’s Instagram, which James had only followed closely for the first two months after moving out, he had gathered that Regulus had briefly dated Kingsley. At least that’s what the pictures they posted together suggested. That drove James crazy. Jealousy burned more with each new post, until finally, it stopped. In its place, there was pain, which he still didn’t know how to deal with. Mary somehow figured out what was going on, so he finally told her everything, and at his request, she blocked Regulus from his account. He probably wouldn’t have been able to do it himself.
He doesn’t even notice the tears as he reaches the dorm. His friend is already there, having gotten a spare key from him. James’s roommate dropped out after the first year, and Potter is still waiting to be assigned a new one.
“Hey, Jamsie. I thought we’d watch the next episode of our favorite show. I still can’t believe Lara chose him,” she suddenly stops when she notices his glassy eyes. “Hey, what’s going on?” she immediately pulls him into a hug, and he stops holding back. He hasn’t cried this much in a long time — maybe never since he was seventeen. The girl tenses a little, likely worried about what could have happened to bring him to this state.
“I met Regulus. He’s probably going to study here,” he says, trying not to worry her unnecessarily. “It’s pathetic,” he adds, pulling away.
“That’s not pathetic, James. Regulus didn’t treat you well, and you have every right to feel that way. Did you see him? Or…?”
“I talked to him. He noticed me and came over. I might not have been the nicest,” he admits, and guilt once again causes an unpleasant tightening in his stomach. He wishes he didn’t feel it, but he is probably just too kind to treat people the way they deserve.
“Oh no. We are not going to feel sorry for ourselves here, especially not regret that you treated him the way you should have. It wasn’t fair on his part, no matter what it meant or didn’t mean.”
“Mary, but I still think about him,” fatigue mixes with sadness as he wonders why this has to come back to him at the worst moment. Moving out seemed like the best way to leave old feelings behind in his hometown, but it turns out it’s not, and he must have particularly bad luck. His day had been rather uneventful, even a bit boring. The familiar routine he was supposed to return to after the holiday break even felt safe. However, it was quickly shattered by one very brief encounter, which would haunt his thoughts for the rest of the day, maybe even the week.
“I know, sweetheart,” she sits across from him and squeezes his hands. “Sometimes feelings don’t listen to reason. Do you remember my brief crush on Lily? I hated myself for ruining our friendship over it. I know how you feel right now. You deserve something good today. Do we go out for drinks, or stay here and do a binge-watch?” she asks, wanting to know what he needs, and James once again thinks about how wonderful his friends are.
“Binge-watch sounds good. But I get to choose what we watch,” he immediately points out, reaching for the remote on the nightstand.
“I’ll let you pick this one time. Wait a second, I bought ice cream earlier.”
James already knows that this year won’t be easy, but it could always be worse. After all, the time he’s already spent here should have helped dull his feelings for his friend’s brother. Maybe he was even on the right track to help them fade a little because today, on his own, he invited Hestia out and really wanted to do it.
However, seeing Regulus was the worst thing that could have happened. His fear, when he must have realized it was him who approached James, and suddenly wasn’t sure what to say, and the hurt when Potter turned out to be colder than usual. James didn’t care whether Regulus now realized his feelings were never platonic. That was the past, and he intended to focus on a new person and relationship.
He picks a comedy just as the brunette returns, carrying a large tub of vanilla ice cream and two spoons. She asks Mary if she wants to stay the night since his roommate’s bed is still free, and James thinks that maybe this evening won’t be so bad. This time, he’ll be stronger and push his feelings aside.
“You’re the best,” he tells her when Macdonald throws him one spoon and lies down beside him.
“I know,” she replies before opening the tub. “Oh, and James, you can keep your heart however long you want, but if you see a chance and all your feelings come back, don’t hold a grudge. Forget about it, and do what’s true to your heart. You might regret it later, but love is hard enough without complicating it more . Make it easy.” James isn’t sure whether he should thank her for these words or yell at her. They make him doubt again, and he’s not so sure anymore if he’s ready for a new relationship.
“Okay, Mary,” he sends her a small smile, and she returns it, which seems to answer everything. Finally, he grabs the remote, but doesn’t start the movie right away. “Was it Emmeline who turned you into such a poet?” he asks, not looking at his friend, because she jabs him in the arm.
“Shut up, James,” but there’s a smile in her voice, and he doesn’t need to look to know she’s blushing.
xxx
The walk from the dorm to the small café hidden around the corner is short. The place is located on one of the side streets, almost as if it’s hidden from tourists. James knows that this is where Hestia’s favorite coffee is served, so it’s no surprise that she suggests it for their outing. He waits by the entrance a bit before their agreed time because she doesn’t like being late.
The September sun isn’t bothering the locals today like it usually does, and it’s one of the reasons James wakes up with a slightly better mood than yesterday. Another reason is the short brunette who spots him and waves from afar. He smiles at her before waving back.
He really likes her. He doesn’t know if it’s romantic feelings, maybe it’s still too soon for that. In any case, Hestia is a good friend, and it’s important to have at least a few of those in the field you’re studying. They met by chance. They had both woken up a bit too late to write one of their essays, and it turned out that there was only one copy left of the book the professor had recommended for the essay. James went to get it just as the brunette was standing in front of the librarian’s desk holding the last copy he was looking for. She suggested they write their essays together, and that’s how they started meeting every day in the library. Eventually, their meetings extended beyond the university walls — first with parties and groups of friends, and then with solo outings.
“Hey, James,” she greets him with a quick hug. The brunette nods toward the door, and they step inside. The aroma of coffee and the smell of freshly baked goods immediately hits his nose. There are a lot of teenage girls here, probably because the seasonal fall coffee returned to the menu last week, available only this season, a few middle-aged couples, and a group of students with laptops and notebooks. They pick one of the last available tables, but they’re lucky enough to snag the one by the window.
“I recommend this coffee. I don’t blame those girls,” she says, pointing at the seasonal special.
“I’ll try it then. Do you want something sweet with it? I’ll go get it for us,” he offers, already deciding what he’s going to order.
“Get me a cinnamon roll,” she decides after a moment, and he stands up and heads to the counter.
He freezes when he sees who is standing a few people ahead of him in the queue. He can’t help but think the whole world must be mocking him, because, of course, it’s Regulus Black. Out of all the cafés in Boston, he had to choose this one. He hopes he’ll be able to return to Hestia unnoticed and tell her the truth, but Regulus turns around. He looks at him for several seconds, which feel like an eternity to James. Potter sees the slightly parted lips and the focused look on Regulus’s face, as if he’s considering what to do. James decides to leave the decision to him. Maybe this is the moment when the fate of their relationship is decided. He doesn’t know it yet, but he’s not going to interfere. It’s Regulus’s turn to lay his cards on the table.
The barista calls him. Regulus picks up his coffee and doesn’t leave but instead heads toward James. Potter feels a strange sense of relief, but the understanding of it will come later.
“Hey, again,” Regulus says, staring at his coffee and suddenly avoiding eye contact. He doesn’t seem uncertain, but rather contrite like a child who’s done something wrong.
“Is that all you have to say to me?” It might seem a bit rude, but his tone is much softer than when they spoke yesterday.
“No… Do you have a moment? I can wait until you get your coffee, and maybe we can talk on the way to the dorms,” James doesn’t want to refuse him, but he knows Hestia is waiting, and he doesn’t want to leave her hanging. He also realizes that refusing will make Regulus withdraw again, so he opts for honesty, not an excuse.
“I came with someone—”
“No, it’s okay. I understand. That was stupid,” Regulus immediately starts, and James doesn’t recognize the Regulus from a year ago, who had mostly treated him with sarcasm and bluntness.
“Let me finish. It’s fine,” James sees Regulus glance behind him, as if trying to guess who he might have come with, which can’t be hard, since Hestia is surely aware of the situation and is watching them. James notices the same furrowed brow that had appeared when Regulus approached him and Peter that one evening, looking like he was jealous. But James isn’t going to fall for that again.
“No, James. This doesn’t make sense. I already messed it up, and I don’t deserve a conversation,” Regulus says before walking out, leaving him in shock. Potter returns to the line, disappointed and confused. Regulus has left him with more questions and is feeding his habit of overanalyzing every little situation.
“Go after him,” Hestia’s voice breaks through his thoughts, and he turns around, surprised. He knows who she means, but he’s still shocked that she’s giving up on their meeting. He tries to read her face for any hint, but she just smiles genuinely at him.
“Go on. You like him, right?”
“I did, but—”
“James, don’t lie to me. I saw you thinking about someone else for a long time.”
“And what about our meeting? I told him we could talk another time,” he’d love to run after Regulus, but he tries to convince the girl to drink her coffee because he feels bad leaving her here. He knows he doesn’t have much time to decide before Regulus disappears around a corner. However, the girl seems to make his decision easier when she laughs softly.
“I’m fine, really,” she seems amused by the whole situation, which calms James down. “I’ll get myself a coffee and visit my parents who live nearby. You go catch him. I expect you to tell me all about it later,” she adds, with mock seriousness, and he nods eagerly before quickly hugging her and running toward the door.
“I love you, Hestia! I owe you the biggest coffee!” he suddenly shouts, now strangely more cheerful, ignoring the surprised looks from half the café’s customers.
Catching up to Regulus turns out to be surprisingly easy. James dodges tourists wearing “Boston loves you” t-shirts, almost bumping into them and building a less-than-ideal reputation with the locals. However, none of this matters when he sees the curls he’s been searching for. He runs faster because the boy is approaching the crosswalk, and he catches up to him just before they reach it. He grabs him by the shoulder, and Regulus pulls his headphones out of his ears. James is reminded of the situation from yesterday, except this time, they’ve switched roles.
Potter can read people. Contrary to what most might think, he’s not that bad at it. Over time, he’s gotten better, and it’s actually quite easy. However, he’s always had trouble with Regulus. It’s not just because Regulus is more closed off than others, offering little pieces of himself on a silver platter. Regulus throws him off every time James is sure he has him figured out. James wants to know what’s going on in his head. Even now, when he’s looking at him with a lack of self-confidence that seems so foreign on his face. James never knows if the brunette will suddenly return to his hatred or show him his star in the sky. Regulus is simply enigmatic, and maybe that’s what really caught James’s attention.
“What about your…?”
“My friend. Hestia is a friend,” James quickly clarifies, as though it should matter. Maybe it does to him, because the tension seems to lift from him.
He looks softer now. None of his usual sharpness or vigilance is visible. James feels an odd urge to run his fingers through his hair and push it away from his face. He shakes himself out of it and swallows, waiting for Regulus to speak. He hopes that he still wants to talk because nothing else has ever mattered to him so much. He remembers Mary’s words from the night before.
“Will you give me a chance to explain everything?” There’s a certain pleading in his eyes that James still can’t quite read. And he really wants to, hoping this conversation might finally give him all the answers. He’d love to have it right now, on the sidewalk, surrounded by people, but he knows those aren’t the most comfortable conditions.
“Yeah. But not here? I know a nice place, come on,” his first impulse is to grab the boy’s hand, like he does with Mary when the crowd is so big they might get separated. However, Regulus isn’t his close friend, so he refrains and simply nods for him to follow.
James is sure Regulus doesn’t know about the rooftop terrace of one of the restaurants. Firstly, he hasn’t lived in Boston long enough, and secondly, not many people know about it. Emmeline first showed it to Mary, and she took James there once. The views are incredible because you can see a large part of the city’s most beautiful area. Plus, you’d have to be really unlucky to run into anyone there, and James hopes this one thing will work in his favor today. He doesn’t want anyone to interrupt their conversation because the roof is small enough that they’d have to whisper to keep anyone else from hearing.
Just before they cross the street, he looks up and is pleased to see no one’s ahead of them. He feels Regulus’s questioning gaze when he opens a door hidden by the dumpster, revealing a narrow corridor and stairs. He doesn’t say anything because he wants it to be a surprise. He manages to surprise Regulus, as the boy literally opens his mouth when they finally step out onto the roof, and before them stretches the breathtaking panorama of Boston.
“It’s a beautiful place,” Black remarks, and James nods and smiles because he’s managed to surprise the boy. However, he quickly becomes serious, as the real reason for their visit comes back to him. He knows this conversation may change nothing or it may change everything. He has a strange feeling that there are only those two options and nothing in between.
“The view is amazing, isn’t it?” He walks over to the edge and sits down on the floor. He doesn’t have to wait long before Regulus joins him. The silence is uncomfortable this time, and James thinks that once again, he’ll be the one to break it. He exhales when he tries to speak, but Regulus interrupts him.
“Listen, I panicked. Back then, a year ago… It always meant something to me. Even the first time, during the game. I’ve liked you for a long time, but it couldn’t happen, and that evening, I was just being selfish. I wanted to steal some last moment for myself before you left for college,” and suddenly, James understands. He recalls the glances and teasing from Pandora, who surely knew everything. Peter didn’t suspect anything, and Regulus was really jealous. He still doesn’t understand the whole situation with Kingsley, but for now, he lets Regulus speak. The time for questions will come soon. “I’m sorry. It was really stupid. I know you probably hate me now and might even think I’m some stalker who came here after you, or that I only listen to my parents, but I really wanted to go to Harvard. I didn’t even know you were studying here too.”
“Why didn’t you tell me? What were your reasons?” James asks, perhaps a bit desperately. He knows that it wouldn’t have been the best idea to get into a serious relationship back then, but “what ifs” have always been the enemies of James.
“You were leaving, James. And then there was Sirius, you wouldn’t do that to him,” James thinks about it and wonders if he would have risked his friendship with Padfoot. Probably, yes. “And besides…”
“And besides what?”
“I didn’t believe you could feel anything for me. I pushed you away for years because it was my defense mechanism against my feelings. I thought I had made you hate me. And then, when it turned out that wasn’t the case, I thought you only saw me as Sirius’s younger brother. Someone to take care of because of some stupid, unspoken, brotherly pact. Whatever you want to call it,” James thinks that he is just as sad now as Regulus. Maybe their reasons are completely different, but somehow they connect, and that gives hope.
“Do you remember when we were younger and I told you I saw Regulus in you? I like you for who you are?” he knows Regulus remembers, because Regulus flinches for a split second.
“I remember. I thought that had changed. After that, we didn’t keep in touch that much. Of course, it was my fault, but—”
“It will never change, Reg. I really like you for who you are. It’s strangely adorable when you insult me and disagree with every little opinion I have,” he laughs quietly, managing to make Regulus chuckle too. But then he becomes serious, and Regulus notices the hope in his eyes.
“I still like you, James. I never stopped,” he confesses, and it feels like the most sincere thing James has heard from him today, and he doesn’t doubt that the rest of the words were true as well. “Do you hate me?”
“Reg,” he dares to say and takes his hands in his own, gently squeezing them. “No matter what you did or said to me, I could never hate you. It’s just impossible.”
“You’re too good for this world,” maybe James’s risk rubs off on Regulus, because now it’s him who cautiously rests his head on the older boy’s shoulder, looking out at the view ahead. They don’t speak for several minutes, simply enjoying each other’s company and the unusually beautiful sunset over crowded Boston.
xxx
Maybe there are still many things they need to explain to each other, but for now, this seems to be enough.
This time, James doesn’t return to the dorm alone. Mary is there, her eyes wide, and then she runs off, throwing some excuse, even though James repeatedly tells her she can stay.
On the way, Regulus tells him a bit more. About how he tried to fall in love with Kingsley, and how Pandora yelled at him because it wasn’t okay. About Sirius’s departure and how hard it was to live in a house that became quieter than usual. James also learned that Barty and Evan dropped out of college and are now in Las Vegas, where they end up in jail for a few days at least once a month.
James also tells him how hard it was to adjust to Boston at first, and that Mary was the only reason he didn’t go crazy. He talks about new friends Regulus needs to meet, and Regulus seems most interested in James’s relationship with Hestia. Together, they come up with the idea that they must meet up someday and play guitars together. Maybe it’ll take them some time to get there, but right now, it seems easy. Not entirely impossible. The strange tension has disappeared, and their relationship has never been so relaxed. Sometimes, it’s almost as if nothing ever happened, and they didn’t get stuck at a very strange point for a whole year.
At first, they think about watching a movie, but the TV stays off. They talk, catching up on all the years they’ve lost. It’s so easy. James has never talked so easily with anyone, and he has the ability to find topics with anyone. Maybe it’s because he really wants to know Regulus’s opinion on every possible subject. It seems to be a mutual feeling because Regulus also asks him about various things and listens with interest, even when James forgets himself and starts talking too much again. It’s unclear when it gets dark outside, and the hours seem to pass too quickly. Regulus is the first to notice that it’s 10:00 PM.
“I should get going,” he points to the clock, and James nods, not happy about it. He quickly comes up with a solution. He bites his tongue, because maybe he shouldn’t. After all, they’ve just started talking again. Regulus turns out to be better at reading people than he is, and immediately notices that James is hesitating.
“Say it, James. I can see you’re losing it.”
That doesn’t encourage James but makes him even more nervous.
“Do you want to stay for the night? I still haven’t been assigned a roommate, so there’s a free bed. I know we have classes tomorrow, but I’d wake up early with you and get the necessary notes. Clothes aren’t a problem either, I’ll lend you something comfortable to sleep in—”
“Sure.”
“Sure?”
“Sure, James,” Regulus laughs, and James quickly joins him. He feels like he’s been looking for a home his whole life, and he’s just found it in the sound of the younger boy’s laugh.
“I’ll find you some clothes.”
He reaches for his suitcase, which still isn’t unpacked. He thinks he should get on that soon. He finds a red t-shirt and the smallest sweatpants he has. Regulus thanks him with a nod and heads to take a shower. During that time, James pulls out his phone, bombarded with question marks sent by his friend. He texts her briefly, summarizing everything and leaving the details for himself and Regulus. He knows she’ll probably ask him a lot of questions at the next opportunity.
When he turns off the light and leaves just the lamp on, Regulus comes out of the bathroom. His cheeks are pinker than usual when he looks at James, who can’t help but scan his figure and notices it. He had given Regulus his old high school team shirt, which has his last name and number on the back. He hadn’t realized it was the one, because he didn’t even know he’d packed it. He hadn’t seen it in his closet for a long time, and it must have ended up in the suitcase by accident.
“You can give me a new one if it bothers you.”
James thinks he’s never seen Regulus so embarrassed. It’s even more adorable than when he teases him.
“It doesn’t bother me. I even like it,” he sees Regulus’s cheeks turn an even more furious shade of pink. “You’re cute when you blush.”
“Shut up, Potter,” Regulus replies immediately and sits on the unoccupied bed, avoiding James’s gaze but not hiding a small smile. James can’t stop himself from reacting similarly.
“I thought we were really done with the whole ‘Potter’ thing.”
“Never.”
While taking a shower, James thinks about how quickly they’ve become so at ease. He still remembers all the pain he felt and knows that this is just the beginning. But he also knows about the childhood the Black brothers had, which Regulus seems to cope with better, though maybe that’s not true at all. Maybe he has to hide more of himself, change even more, because he doesn’t express his anger the way Sirius did. But James intends to be here and help him with everything if he just asks.
He feels an incredible sense of relief, even though just a few weeks ago, he never thought he’d even get to talk to Regulus. That old James would never have believed it, and yet, when he comes out of the bathroom, the boy is still here. He’s lying on the bed, looking so soft, completely different than when he’s awake. The tension disappears again, and he seems so relaxed, and James only thinks that he wouldn’t mind seeing that sight every night. He covers him with a blanket before lying down himself. He can’t fall asleep for a long time, but this time, the corners of his mouth ache from constantly smiling.