Chapter Text
Shifty had never had to plan his own birthday before. Not to say he’d never planned any birthday; he’d helped plan his parents and brother and aunt and uncles over the years. Just never his own by himself.
He crossed off a few ideas straight away. He was too young to drink (and shouldn’t drink in public either, who knew how it affected his biology. Which was another question to add to his list!), so that cut out everything to do with bars or parties, and he didn’t own a house to have a house party at, which meant he’d need to go out and do something.
In the end he went around town and marked suitable birthday activity areas, then made pros and cons lists for each one until he had a more manageable list to work with. The next step was asking his list of potential friends and enemies and seeing how many people he’d be working with.
He got ten confirmed party goers, including Jon, Marcy, and Darcy. His roommate agreed to hang out, which was nice, as well as a few people from some of his classes. He estimated about half of them would do last minute call outs, which left six including himself.
An excellent turn out really, for his first adult solo party. He decided to go with bowling as the day activity, followed by dinner at an inexpensive restaurant, then going with Jon and Marcy to hang out in the woods for some shapeshifter night time activities. It was also a good place to go for his birthday presents delivery, since his dad was sending a personal drop off for him.
Never knew when the government would steal your mail after all.
His birthday was actually on Saturday too, which meant he got to sleep in, then call his family first thing in the morning. Jonah was already gone; he tended to head out early on the weekends to mess around with things in the college greenhouse. He apparently wanted to be a botanist of some kind, which was super exciting.
Shifty rolled out of bed as a log, then turned human before he hit the floor. The best thing about Jonah was how often he left and how little he cared to check in with Shifty, as long as Shifty followed all his rules. They worked well together.
Once he decided on an outfit, he went over to call the house phone number, sitting at his desk and grinning in excitement.
“Hello, Stanford Pines speaking,” came his pops voice.
“Hi pops! It’s me!”
“Shifty!” there was a rustling noise as the phone was moved, then “Give me a moment, I just-”
Shifty waited patiently as his pops voice faded into muffles, and a moment later he was greeted by a chorus of “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” from his family.
“Thank you!” Shifty said, beaming at the pictures on his desk, “Who all is there?”
“Everyone but Carla and Tate. Carla got called up to yell at someone in D.C. who was trying to breed mind controlling mushrooms, and Tate had to head out early this morning for work. He said he’d call you later though, so just keep an ear out.”
“How does it feel to be fourteen squirt” Uncle Stan’s voice cut through, “any signs of second puberty yet?”
“No Uncle Stan, Marcy said I already went through it. Apparently, that’s why I used to secrete so much as a baby.”
“Disgusting. But at least it wasn’t human puberty.”
They all shuddered as they remembered Tates normal mood swings and anti-rebellious behavior. He’d been strange for a few years there before he got through the worst of it. Shifty was just glad all he had to worry about was growing his human form at an appropriate rate.
“What did you decide on for your birthday?" dad said, and Shifty could hear Uncle Stan shouting in the background, “Its not too late to come home and celebrate it here with us if you changed your mind.”
“Sweetie, don’t be absurd,” he heard his ma say quietly, “he’ll hurt himself trying to go that fast down the highway, just leave him be,”
“I know I just-” dads voice got cut off as pops grabbed the phone again.
“So? what did you decide to do for your first official solo birthday?”
“Bowling, followed by a meal, then late night stretching party.”
“Sounds exciting! I believe I stayed in for most of my adult birthdays, so you’re already doing a better job at socializing with humans than I did!”
“Everyone does better than you, you still think its OK to run out of conversations.” Uncle Stan said, sounding amused.
“So do you,”
“Yeah, but at least I’m not pretending to hear animal calls or something. People know I just want to leave. It’s different.”
Shifty leaned away as they started scuffling, then ma’s voice came through.
“Happy Birthday Shifty, the presents should be there tonight, and make sure to get a good distance this time.”
“I will ma, it was only one time!” get too close to a self-destructing messenger bot once and you never hear the end of it really.
“I know, but still. Make sure to take pictures and have lots of fun.”
“And our next care package should be by at the end of the month,” dad said, crackling the phone, “Your ma added some serums to try with your friends to promote cellular stretching, and we went through your pops collection of tomes to get together anything that sounds like it has to do with those organizations they warned you of. There was a lot, so I got it on a laptop for you. Consider it an extra birthday gift, a mobile library! Of some of Stanford’s collection.”
“Thanks dad! And ma! And pops! And uncle Stan!”
“Hey,” said Dan, and Shifty chuckled.
“And Dan. It was great to hear from everyone!”
He held the phone away from his ear as they talked over each other in an incomprehensible mess, then shouted a goodbye before someone hung up.
It was disappointing that Tate wasn’t there, but he’d just have to make sure to catch him later when he wasn’t working.
He called a few other friends from high school, then went out to enjoy his first solo birthday. There was a breakfast place he wanted to check out, and he wanted to try and get a feel for the local law enforcement, so he snuck in their vents as a mouse and rifled through their data banks for a few hours until it was time to meet up for bowling.
The bowling place wasn’t too far away, but Shifty made sure to come in from another direction, just in case. Jon was already waiting by the entrance, even though Shifty was already coming twenty minutes early.
“Hey Jon!” Shifty shouted as he came closer. Jon jumped, then whirled around to face him.
“Oh, hey Theo. Happy Birthday.” Jon straitened, then shifted (hah!) awkwardly as Shifty came closer and opened the door, “no one else is here yet, I think. Darce and Marce should be here soon.”
“That’s fine, we’re early anyway,” he held the door open for Jon, then took a look around, “and you’re right, that means you get first choice on ball! I’ll get us sorted while you do that!”
Marcy and Darcy came by around five minutes later (on regular bicycles. He’d have to ask his dad to build that motorcycle after all. Maybe two, depending on Darcy’s motorcycle vibes). Jonah wandered in after, looking nervous, then Gertrude Middleton, who he sat next to in his intro to musical theory class.
It was tedious, but Notbadsburg did require some basic courses to graduate. At least until he tested out of them at the end of the semester.
No one else showed when it was time to get started, and a few people had already texted to back out. That was fine, he only really needed one or two good relationships to make it through a complete college experience, and he was already at five.
“Thanks for hanging out with me on my birthday,” he said, putting in everyone’s names at the lane, “I’ve never been on my own, so I appreciate it.”
“No problem, Theo,” Darcy said, looking around, “thanks for inviting us to hang out. I’m Darcy by the way,”
“Jonah Baxter, future botanist.”
“He’s in my intro to physics.” Shifty added, finishing up, “you’re up first Jon, since you showed first.”
“Um. OK. I’ve never bowled before, so don’t expect anything here.” Jon said, grabbing a ball and looking nervous.
“That’s fine, I haven’t either,” Gertrude chirped. She was a bright pastel blue jacket, with pastel pink pants and a white tank top, “this is my first time being invited out like this, it’s very exciting.”
Jonah coughed, then looked around nervously, “I am also unfamiliar with it. I spend most of my time doing solo outdoor physical activities.”
“That’s great!” Shifty said, watching Jon get a gutter ball and moving up to go, “Its always fun to try new things!” With that he rolled a perfect strike, then turned and smiled at Marcy, waving for her to go, “There’s not a lot to do back at my home town, but there is a bowling alley! My Uncle taught me a lot of his tricks.”
Marcy cursed as she got six pins, then swapped out for Darcy.
“Marcy, by the way,” she said, leaning back next to Jon, “I’m just tagging along with Darc. I don’t go to school here.”
“Pleasure to make your acquaintance,” Jonah said, just as Gertrude chirped, “Stellar!”
“What’s your major,” Gertrude asked as Darcy got a spare and waved Jonah up, “I’m here to become a doctor and conquer death itself!”
Jon and the not-twins twins stared at her, but Shifty just nodded.
“I want to become an astronomer and discover alien life, then make contact with them” he said, watching Jonah roll the ball and knock over a single pin. He did a fist bump and a quiet victory cry, then swapped out with Gertrude.
“Well, since we’re being honest,” he said, lounging in the chair and looking vey proud of himself, “I’m going into botany to create the perfect plant. I want to grow one that can communicate with humans.”
Jon and the not-twin twins continued to stare, but Shifty just nodded again. These sounded like amazing ideas.
“If you like, I can introduce you to my roommate,” he said, watching Gertrude get nine pins down and swap with Jon, who was looking even less sure of himself than usual, “he’s big into botany too.”
Jonah glared at him, and Shifty smiled.
“I’m going into journalism,” Darcy said slowly, looking between them, “I, uh, want to uncover government conspiracies and expose them to the public. I guess? But it can take a lot to get there, so I’m starting small with sports.”
“That sounds amazing!” Gertrude said, clapping as Shifty got another strike after Jon’s gutter ball, “You need to be more confident Darcy! Try and find the local sports conspiracy and move upwards!”
“The local sports conspiracy?” Jon asked, sitting next to Darcy as Marcy went up to bowl, “is there one?”
“Oh, there’s always conspiracies of some kind around,” Jonah said, “You just need to know where to look, like how the seniors are growing weed in the back of the green house, or how the swim team are all in a polycule.”
“Oh!” Gertrude clapped her hands, “Or how the medical grad students have a secret underground organ black market with the cadavers! There are so many undocumented organs floating around, it’s insane.”
“And what about how the college president has a secret dining area at the top of the admin building!” Shifty added eagerly, “he has steak dinners with his most favored staff every month, and some of the professors get really competitive making sure they’re on the invite list.”
“How do you know that?” Darcy asked, going up to bowl, “Aren’t you all freshman? You’ve only been here a month.”
“You just need to have a negative presence,” Gertrude said, “Then everyone talks around you and forgets you exist! You learn all kinds of things! But then no one talks to you, so.” she shrugged, and Jonah nodded.
“That’s, kind of sad?” Jon said, looking uncomfortable. Poor guy. Didn’t know how to stop existing.
“Oh, its fine,” Gertrude said, clapping at Jonahs single pin drop, “I’m used to it. That’s why this was so exciting!” She went up to bowl, grabbing a ball and eyeing the pins, “Theo’s the first person to invite me to a birthday party since I was six and discovered the cemetery behind my house. Oh! That reminds me!”
Gertrude got eight pins, then skipped over to her bag and pulled out something wrapped, handing it over to Shifty. It was black with little skulls on it. They had little pink bows on their heads.
“This is for you! Happy birthday!”
“Wow, thank you! My parents’ package won’t arrive until tonight, so this is the first one of the day!”
Shifty ripped into it, ignoring the looks the others were exchanging with each other. Inside was a journal, with a green cover and little white stars with a light green classic alien face in the middle.
“I wasn’t really sure what you wanted,” She said as he flipped it open and went through the pages, “but I remembered you said you were into astronomy, and it looked super cute! Plus, who doesn’t need a notebook!”
“Thanks Gertrude! This totally fits my alien theme!” perfect for writing down his observations on star movements and potential UFO sightings.
“I also brought a gift,” Jonah announced as Jon got another gutter ball, “I wasn’t sure of the proper birthday procedures. The last one I went to was in kindergarten, and I was run out when the venus flytrap I brought bit the birthday girl.”
Jonah stuck a hand in his pocket and handed over a single unwrapped key chain. It had a white blank star on the end and nothing else. Shifty grinned and clipped it onto the notebook. It matched perfectly.
“Thanks Jonah! I had a similar thing happen to me in second grade,” Shifty said as he went up and rolled another perfect strike then stepped down, “I was invited to a party as a prank and my uncle attacked the birthday boy and then destroyed the cake. His parents were crazy upset, but they couldn’t do anything about it because otherwise they had to admit their son only invited me to cover me in chickens’ blood and chase me through the woods.”
Marcy, Darcy, and Jon looked at him in horror, while Jonah looked on in sympathy and Gertrude nodded.
“Luckly, I didn’t actually get covered, since my brother Tate figured him out and dumped it over him instead. He’s so cool! Which reminds me, I have to call him! Do you guys want me to get you anything to eat or drink while I’m up?”
“You call your brother; I’ll get us food. Its your birthday after all.” Darcy said, looking pale. Gertrude went up with her, while Shifty stepped away and dialed Tate’s number. It rang for several minutes, then went to voicemail.
Must still be working then.
Shifty frowned down at his phone. This was his first birthday without his brother. It was… upsetting? That he hadn’t gotten to speak with him yet. Tate was the coolest guy he knew, always looking after him and supporting his interests. They’d never been apart this long, not since the day they met each other.
Well, the fishing season was starting to wind down, maybe he was extra busy getting everything closed for the winter. It was his first official year working on top of his own classes with the community college.
He’d have to call again later.
Shifty sighed, then smiled and went back to bowling. Darcy and Gertrude brought back some snacks, and they spent the rest of the time chatting and trying to teach Jon how to bowl.
In the end Shifty had an overwhelming victory with a perfect score, while Jon managed to make one of the pins wobble on his last turn. Gertrude came in second, then Darcy, Jonah, and Marcy. Shifty would almost think shapeshifters were inherently terrible at bowling, if it wasn’t for his own score.
The staff were also so impressed with his perfect score they gave him a free bowling ball and a coupon for his next visit. Shifty had everyone sign it for him, then led them all to the restaurant he found when he was touring earlier.
Jon and Marcy looked a bit nervous when Shifty led them towards it, but they didn’t say anything so it must have been fine. And who didn’t love real Italian pizza! He set the bowling ball down by his feet, then talked toppings to figure out how to optimize their orders.
Jonah and Marcy got a meat lovers, while Darcy and Gertrude got a half cheese and pepperoni. Shifty and Jon shared a deluxe, then all the Shapeshifters ate the leftovers and any uneaten breadsticks.
They chatted more over their meal, Jon talking about wanting to design his own comics and work as a photographer.
“I like looking at different faces,” he said, munching on a breadstick, “and I have a… personal story I want to share. To reach out to people like me. I had a rough time growing up, and I want to let others like me know that’ll be OK. That they can be whoever they want, no matter what anyone tells them.”
He shot Marcy a look at this, then gave Shifty a side eye. Must be talking about shapeshifters then. That was pretty cool, making a story just for them.
“That’s so sweet,” Gertrude said, setting her elbows on the table and kicking her legs, “I just want to conquer death to prove myself to an uncaring universe that there is no real God and science triumphs over all. Nothing heartwarming like that.”
She sighed, then took a sip of her drink.
“Really makes you think about your motives in life.”
“Right,” Jon said, eyeing her, “my motives.”
“I used to watch pests eat the bushes back home,” Jonah said, glaring at his meat lovers, “and I wanted to give them a chance to fight back. It’s not fair that they have to sit there and just get eaten while mammals and insects get free range of movement. That’s why I want to develop and breed that can talk to humans and defend its plant brethren.”
“That’s. Something.” Marcy said, “But isn’t that like. Natural? For things to eat plants?”
“Maybe so, but isn’t it our job as future scientists to upend the natural order?” Jonah took an angry bite of his pizza and glared at a piece of peperoni, “I just want to even the playing field a bit. At the very least help with natural pest control options on farms and reduce the amounts of weed killers and chemicals sprayed into the environment.”
“Oooh, maybe make a plant that can eat the chemicals?” Gertrude added, leaning forwards and looking at him, “Then it can absorb all the harmful ones and help protect the rest or something?”
Jonah frowned, face looking pensive as he nodded and chewed his pizza.
“A super plant,” he muttered, gazing into the distance, “I could work with that.”
“You guys need more normal hobbies,” Marcy said, “get out of the labs more often or something. Talking to you makes me want to strangle somebody.”
“Hey, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to grow super plants or end death,” Shifty said, grabbing another slice of pizza, “My ma once genetically designed a sea monster to stop illegal fishing that turned against her and tried to swallow our boat whole! Now that was really terrifying.”
“Oh man I think I remember reading about that,” Gertrude said, as Marcy put her head in her hands and Darcy and Jon sighed, “That was what, six years ago? Didn’t someone die?”
“Seven years ago, and no one died. They thought my dad got eaten, but it turned out he’d designed an identical submarine and was battling the sea monster underwater.”
Marcy laid her head on the table and clutched her hair, and Jon covered his face. Jonah frowned at his pizza, then turned to look at Shifty.
“Once I get farther with my education, do you think you could introduce us? I want to learn more about genetics as I go, and she sounds like an expert.”
“Sure! My ma loves going on about her work! Let me know when you think you’re ready for it,”
Jonah nodded sharply, then took another vicious bite out of his pizza. Man must really be a meat lovers fan.
They talked more about some of their classes, before finishing up and paying the bill. Jon covered his portion as a birthday gift, looking uncomfortable as he admitted he forgot to buy one.
Shifty bid a goodnight to everyone but Jonah as they got closer to campus, then good night to Jonah as he peeled away back to the green house. Must be working on a project or something, and it wasn’t really that late. The sun was still only barely setting.
He dropped his bowling ball and new journal back at his dorm, finding a good spot for it next to his desk, then crept up to the roof and turned into a pigeon, holding his phone in his talons as he made his way towards the forest.
Jon and Marcy were already there, the latter tying her bike up to a bike rack near the trail.
And so was Darcy. Darcy was also here.
Shifty smiled as he landed and turned back to his human form, but he knew his eye was twitching. He didn’t dislike Darcy, but he really wanted an all-shapeshifter night. Darcy wasn’t one, but he didn’t know how to tell her to go away.
And Tate still hadn’t called. What did that mean?
“So, what exactly is a stretching party,” Jon asked as he followed Shifty through the woods.
“Its where we go deep into the woods where normal humans can’t bother us, and stretch! These woods are pretty good, but we’ll have to go off trail if we really want to get to it.” Shifty led them off the path and through the woods to the spot he’d found a few weeks ago. He could hear them stumbling behind him and turned to watch them tripping over roots.
Another good reason to get them out of the town. They really needed to work on how to walk through the woods.
“Here we are!” he said as he led them out into the clearing he’d found. The sounds of the nearby ocean filled the air, and the area was about half the size of the one his house was in back home.
“Its not perfect, since its smaller than I’d like, but it works to get your body moving,” Shifty said, as he dropped being human into various animals and trotted around the clearing, “my pops repurposed his bunker to make a really good stretching room. It has bedrock walls that do a great job of absorbing shock. I’ll show you if you ever come by to visit.”
“His bunker huh,” Jon said, stepping into the clearing nervously. He watched Shifty turn into different kinds of birds midflight, then tentatively shifted into Shifty’s human form, then into other human faces he didn’t recognize. Marcy started doing the same, standing to the side awkwardly and turning parts of her body partially animalistic as she went.
Darcy sat on a nearby fallen log and pulled a notebook out of her bag and started writing something, squinting in the dying light.
“Yeah, it has really good space, now,” Shifty bounced over as a ball, then popped into Gertrude and slung an arm over the other shifters shoulders, dragging them further into the clearing.
“I talked to my ma about your lack of variety shifting,” she said, letting go and standing in front of them, “She thinks it has to do with a lack of use, based on what little information you’ve shared with me about our species normal growth. I have more variety since I’m constantly stretching and using my ‘shifting muscles’. I thought maybe we could work on that! Start small, then build up!”
“It would be useful,” Marcy said, looking like an old man before shifting back into her preferred human form. Jon had already gone back on the walk over. Not a good sign really.
“First things first,” Shifty said, turning her hair purple, “colors! You said you can only turn into face you’ve seen, so now try changing the pigmentation of those faces! Stretch them out! It shouldn’t be too dissimilar from turning parts of your body into animals,” she turned to look at Marcy for that last part, gesturing to her clawed hands.
“Alright,” Jon mumbled, closing his eyes. Shifty smiled as nothing happened, and Jon peeked an eye open, “Did anything happen? I’m not really sure what I’m doing here.”
“Yeah, I’m not really getting the color thing,” Marcy said, looking at her furry arms and frowning, “How is it similar to partial shifts.”
“Because its just changing one thing about yourself. It’s. Hmmm.” Shifty tilted her head thinking. She’d tried to describe shifting to her pops when she was younger but couldn’t really get what she was talking about across. She’d assumed it had something to do with him being human, but maybe she was just doing a bad job explaining. It made this a good learning opportunity for herself.
“When you move your arm,” she said slowly, lifting her arm and turning into Aunt Carla to try and get a feeling on how to explain things. Aunt Carla was great at explaining things, “you’re moving all your muscles and having them work together. Think of that like shifting, you’re making your body move together into a new form. Now I want you to focus on the individual muscles. Or actually, your hand.”
She lifter her hand up and spread her fingers, “You’ve been moving your body like this,” She stuck all her fingers together and moved them as one, then bent down and tried to pick up a rock without separating them. It took a few tries, but she managed to grab one, holding it out in her stiff hand.
“It functions and does the job, but its kind of terrible at it. So now try to separate the movements one at a time,” She spread her fingers, then curled them one at a time around the rock, holding it properly. “Don’t worry about going crazy, just recognizing the differences in what you’re doing. Focus on your shifts and the different parts of your movement.”
There. That should do it.
Jon started shifting into other people with his eyes closed, eyebrows pinched and mumbling to himself. Marcy kept staring at her arm, turning it back and forth between human and animal and frowning at it. Shifty went back to changing forms, turning into different objects then back to his human form and changing the patterns of his clothes. This made Marcy angry for some reason.
When the light started getting terrible, he pulled out his phone and turned on the light (after calling Tate. Still no answer) then set it on the ground. Darcy wandered over as well, putting her notebook away and watching the others figure out the color changing while Shifty tried to explain how he did it.
“So, Theo,” she asked, after Marcy had snapped at him to back off, “you want to find aliens? Isn’t that. Well. I know a lot of supernatural things exist, but isn’t that a bit much?”
“Not really. Shapeshifters are descended from the survivors of an alien crash. My pops found the site and matched some of the skeletons to my original form, so I know they’re out there. All I need to do is find them.”
Jon’s eyes snapped open, and he turned to stare at Shifty. Marcy glowered at him as well, but he was focused on Darcy and the lost look in her eyes. Then he remembered he wasn’t supposed to talk about his pops secret crash site.
Oops.
“I, uh-”
Thankfully he didn’t have to explain himself, as suddenly a man dressed in an all black robe stepped out from the bushes. They all turned to stare at him, and Shifty bent down to pick up his phone as he approached.
“Well, if it isn’t Jon Doe and Marcy Swanson,” The mystery guy said in a bad fake Italian accent. It didn’t look like he was wearing a bathrobe, just a regular one, so he wasn’t a wizard, “And another shapeshifter. Tell me child, what’s your name?”
“Its-” Shifty was cut off as Marcy slapped her clawed hand over his mouth and glared at him. He glared back and licked it. She shouted as she jumped away, waving her hand and looking disgusted.
“Delightful. Three shapeshifters.” The man pulled his hood back, revealing a pale face with red eyes and black greasy looking hair. A vampire then. These guys were total creeps.
“I represent the House of Last Dawn. I have a… job opportunity for you.”
“No thanks!” Shifty chirped, ignoring the shushing from everyone else, “my parents send me funds for all my living expenses, so I don’t need a job.”
“And I’m not available, ever.” Jon said, stepping closer to Darcy and pulling a tiny sword from his pocket. It looked like the same one from the night they officially met, which was incredibly cool.
Marcy growled, stepping closer as well and flexing her claws.
“Ah, I don’t think I was making myself clear,” mystery man said, just as more men stepped out from the bushes, “I wasn’t giving you a choice.”
Shifty tilted his head, just as Jon’s sword became full length and he jammed it into a hook on his belt, then drew it. Marcy snarled, and the surrounding men hissed and lunged forwards, undead claws coming up and teeth flashing.
“Darcy, stick with Shifty!” Marcy yelled, then lunged forwards and started clawing and manhandling the vampires. Jon yelled, shifting into a more muscled person he didn’t recognize, then started swinging his sword around, driving off the approaching hoard from his other side. Darcy gripped onto his arm, looking frightened.
Shifty watched them battle for a moment, as Marcy flung the vampires around and Jon sliced off their limbs. It seemed very brutal, but these vampires also reeked of human blood once he changed his nose to smell them, and were also very well fed, nothing like the pale teens that hung out at the hospital or the nice ladies who worked at the magic market and kept trying to drag Uncle Stan away ‘for a good time’.
They reminded him of Kill Billys, which meant it was probably OK to do a little killing for self-defense since there wasn’t any nearby convenience stores and he didn’t have any anti vampire things on him. Plus, they were attacking them, and also evil, judging by the attempted kidnapping.
First, he’d better get Darcy to safety. Humans were especially vulnerable to vampires, especially ones like this. Then he could have some fun! It was getting dark out, and he’d already been warned off of going to crazy at Halloween, so this was a good way to get some screams in.
With that in mind he turned off his flashlight, shoved his phone into his chest, then grabbed Darcy, turning into a giant eagle and taking off into the air. Several people screamed as his wings blasted them backwards. One of them might have been Darcy.
He got above the clearing, then shot forwards into the air, catching a draft and circling around. It was pretty dark out, and there weren’t any good spots to land, so he dived down nearby, pulled his wings back to slow down, then turned into a gorilla, holding Darcy close as he slammed into a tree.
“Man, rough landing huh.” He said, making his way down and looking towards the clearing where the fighting was happening. Darcy didn’t respond, looking pale and windblown, gripping on tight to his fur. He pried her off halfway down once he found a sturdy branch, transferring her grip to the tree.
“You wait here; I’ll be right back. Try to stay quiet if you can, they can hear your heartbeat if it really gets going.”
He’d just started making his way down when Darcy jerked into motion, grabbing onto his arm.
“Wait! Theo.” Shifty sighed, coming back up. He wanted to get into a cool shapeshifting fight with some vampires, not babysitting. But Darcy was Marcy’s sister, and she’d get mad if he left her like this.
“What is it Darcy,” Shifty said, not doing a lot to hide his irritation. Darcy swallowed, then took a deep breath.
“Take me with you, I can look after myself.”
“Against vampires? Fully fed ones?” Shifty looked at her unimpressed. She was in good shape, but not supernaturally good shape. And she didn’t have any weapons that he’d noticed. The way she shifted uncomfortably made it obvious she knew she didn’t stand a chance.
“I can’t just sit back and hide why you guys fight those guys,” she whispered, “When I found out Marcy was… well. Not my actual twin, it was rough. Then there was Jon and all those guys after them. I can’t- I don’t want to sit around being useless while they’re in danger.”
Nothing about him being in danger, he noticed. Not that they’d known each other long, but still.
“You’re not being useless,” he turned into a raccoon and sat next to her, “you’re staying out of the way. You can’t do much anyways, and they’d worry about you if you were in the thick of it defenseless.”
“That’s not the point, I-” She sighed, clutching the trunk and looking lost, “we got into a huge fight, and I’m trying to show my support. I’m not a shapeshifter, so I can’t understand what it’s like, but I’m trying. I just….”
She sniffed, then flinched as someone screamed further in the woods.
“I want them to know it doesn’t matter to me, what they look like. That I’ll be there no matter what.”
Well, now Shifty felt like a jerk, wanting her to go away all the time. He thought about Tate, and how he’d always been around, no matter Shifty’s form. His brother had been his best friend from the moment they’d met, always playing with him and looking out for him. He tried to imagine what it would be like, discovering Tate was something else so suddenly, then not being able to understand how to help.
Kind of like right now, being so far away and not knowing why his brother hadn’t called him on his birthday.
“I get it, I think,” Shifty said finally, listening to the shouts below them, “but it’s also a bad idea to risk yourself for no reason.”
“I know,” she said quietly, sniffing.
They sat there for a moment, listening to the screams and the sounds of fighting echoing around the woods. Shifty sighed, then turned back into a gorilla and held out a hand.
“Fine, you can come with me, but you have to ride on my back. I don’t want them to get mad at me if I lose you.”
Darcy stared at him, then wiped her face on her sleeve and grabbed his hand, smiling at him.
“Thanks Theo, you’re a good kid.”
“I’m legally nineteen, so not a kid.”
With that he held onto her, then slid down the tree, shifting into a mess of black tentacles and eyes as he hit the bottom. Darcy gasped, looking around in horror, before he turned part of himself into cushioned chair and strapped her in.
“Its gonna get crazy for a bit, so hold on,” several of his mouths said, and she nodded, staring wide eyed as he slithered and crawled through the forest, catching onto the scent of blood and rocketing towards it.
Once he got closer, he grabbed onto the branches above and swung towards the vampires. There were two of them, one clutching the stump where its arm had been and hissing at each other. Shifty hissed with all his mouths, then pounced, grabbing onto their torsos and slamming them into each other. They cried out, then abruptly went silent as he wrapped their skulls and crushed them, their bodies disintegrating into ash and leaving their clothes behind.
“The best thing about vampires,” he told Darcy as he found his next target, “is that they don’t leave a lot of blood, being undead. Their skulls are sturdier though, so their immune to harmonies and it takes more effort to crush them.”
Darcy just nodded at him, hands gripping into the arms of the chair he’d made her as he gave himself panther legs to run through the woods, shifting his colors in different shadowy patterns to blend in.
He did feel bad, having to crush all these vampire skulls, but they were actively harming society by the looks of it and tried to kidnap him. Plus, they were undead, so really, he was just getting rid of the un part.
There had been a few dozen vampires that had burst out in the clearing. It looked like half of them had tried to follow him into the woods, and he had fun stalking and pouncing at them in the darkness. It was even better when he realized they had walkie talkies and he grabbed one, whispering in it with overlapping voices speaking total gibberish. It panicked the rest, making it easier to creep up and grab them.
The few that tried to bite him before he got a good grip screamed as their fangs broke against his plated skin. That was another good thing about vampires, their fangs were just teeth. Teeth were easy to break if they were biting full force on reinforced metal skin.
Darcy just nodded along at this, then declined talking into the walkie talkie to make spooky noises. Shifty just shrugged all his tentacles and kept going, more fun for him.
When he finally cleared out the last wandering vampire he made his way back to the clearing. Marcy and Jon were still there, panting and covered in scratches. The main mystery guy was there also, along with ten more vampires circling around them, a few with missing limbs or looking even paler. The clearing was littered with piles of clothes and ash.
The main mystery vampire had also thrown off his robe, revealing pale white skin and a very muscular body, with creepy red pulsing veins. He was monologuing something, looking smug.
Shifty sent several of his tentacle’s forwards, snatching the two closest vampires and crushing their skulls. Then he hooked some into the branches above and jumped, swinging into the clearing and crashing into the center, random limbs forming from his mass to push himself up.
“Hey guys!” he chirped with a few of his mouths as a tentacle went over and grabbed Darcy’s bag for her. She snatched it with shaking hands, looking pale. Shifty frowned, then felt her forehead. It didn’t feel warm, but maybe he’d been slinging her around too much. He didn’t know if she suffered from motion sickness now that he thought about it.
“Theo?” Jon said, wide eyed, “Wha..” he trailed off, staring at Shifty. Shifty changed his colors, going through the rainbow before settling back to black.
“Fascinating,” mystery muscle man said, flashing his fangs in the moonlight, “Truly you are in a class of your own. That shift, that mobility, you’d make a powerful asset.”
“I guess,” he said, then shot out his tentacles to grab the vampires that were trying to run away. He crushed their skulls, then shook off the ash. Four more, plus the mystery guy.
“Perhaps we got on the wrong foot,” he said, hands behind his back, “I can offer you…” he trailed of and frowned, then looked up at the sky. A whirring sound was getting closer, heading straight for them.
“Wait a moment, what is-”
He was cut off as something slammed into him from above, crushing him into a pile of ash. The remaining vampires stared slack jawed at it, frozen.
It looked like one of dad’s delivery bots, except instead of a small little helicopter with a package, there was a larger helicopter with a giant box with a hatch on the side. Shifty stared at it, wide eyed, just as Tate kicked the door open, walked over to the side, and threw up.
“TATE!” Shifty yelled, throwing Darcy at Marcy and sliding towards him, avoiding the puke pile, “TATE! TATE! TATE!”
Shifty grabbed his brother and lifted him into the air, then curled him close and hugged him with all his tentacles. Tate groaned, rubbing his face and swatting some of them away.
“That was a terrible idea,” he said, “remind me to tell dad to work on his delivery system. It’s not ready for living things. That landing was awful.”
Shifty vibrated with excitement, changing forms rapidly and hanging onto Tate. Tate let him, then walked back to the box and pulled out another smaller large box. His birthday presents.
“We need to get farther back,” he said, ushering his friends towards the edge of the clearing. Shifty used this time to spear the last vampires through the eyes, letting them crumble to dust. Tate raised an eyebrow, then shook his head fondly.
“What. What are we- what’s happening. Who is this guy?” Marcy said, looking back and forth from Tate to the box.
“This is Tate, my brother,” Shifty said, purring as he shifted into a cat and rubbed his face into Tate’s hair, just as the delivery bot launched back into the air and exploded. His friends yelled and jumped back, but Tate just kept an eye on the flames.
“Dad didn’t want to start any forest fires,” Tate said, turning towards his friends, “so this one went back up. Happy Birthday Shifty.”
Shifty squealed, then turned into a snake and draped himself across Tates shoulder, throwing up his phone to land on top of the box as he did so. Tate shook his head again, then held the box under one arm so he could run a hand down Shifty’s back.
His friends just gaped at them, then at the falling embers from above. Darcy clutched her bag and walked backwards into a tree and slid to the ground. Jon sheathed his sword, then looked back and forth between everything, covered in ash and shaky.
“This is the best birthday surprise!” Shifty said, rubbing their faces as Marcy started waving at things and screaming silently, “I got worried when I couldn’t reach you,”
“Yeah, no service up there, and I didn’t want to give myself away,” Tate said, looking around, “I figured, I could spend the night, you could show me around tomorrow, spend the day together. I’d have shown up last night, but dad didn’t finish the calibrations until this morning.”
“How are you getting back home?” Shifty asked, crawling into his hair as a squirrel and peering through his hair into his eyes, “Is someone coming to pick you up?”
“Nah, Uncle Ford figured out a human summoning spell, so he’ll just zap me back tomorrow night.”
“Your uncle can summon people?” Jon said, still staring at everything and looking lost. Darcy had closed her eyes and was taking deep breaths while Marcy paced back and forth in the ruined clearing, still waving her arms and moving her mouth.
“Yeah.” Tate looked around, frowning, “You guys done stretching? This place is kind of wrecked, and we should get away before someone comes to investigate the explosion.”
“WHAT JUST HAPPENED!” Marcy screamed, turning towards them, “WHAT! WHY! WSERKSKLJ!”
She snarled, hands coming up to clutch at her head.
“Birthday delivery,” Tate told her, then looked down at Shifty, “Which way to town?”
Shifty turned into a dog then darted towards the path, running back and forth to herd his friends so they’d follow and chatting to Tate the whole time, telling him about his birthday and all his classes. Tate hummed as he followed, talking about a few of his own and how the lake was doing.
His friends stumbled behind, occasionally interrupting to ask Tate questions, then twitching when he gave them one- or two-word answers.
Shifty said goodbye once they left the woods, turning into his human form and dragging Tate towards the dorms. They walked in silence for a while, enjoying each other’s company. Then Tate turned to face him, just as they reached the dorm.
“That Marcy girl needs a motorcycle,” he said, and Shifty beamed at him.
Best. Solo. Birthday. Ever.