Chapter Text
Chapter 2
Fragile like glass
Even though it was a late night for Nightstalk and Blazebright, the patrol got up at first light to move on. They only had one more place to go: Thorne’s Camp. The one place where Nightstalk and so many other Warriors had sworn to never go. Where Snowmask and Alderhiss had endured so much hardships, where so many cats had lost their lives. Where Thorne ruled with her iron paw.
Nightstalk didn't know what to expect, she had afterall never been there. Snowmask never described it, any features. Only that every time she saw him, he looked worse and worse. Alderhiss, however, grew more and more uncomfortable as they neared. She led the way with Sergepelt by her side, the tom looking more or less indifferent to be back. He could also just be stoic. Nightstalk pondered.
The deputy didn't notice that they had arrived before the pair in front came to a stop. She gazed around, seeing nothing out of the ordinary. This is the camp?
There were no protective walls surrounding it, only a few bigger rocks. The ground was sandy and rocky. On the other end was what looked like a den, made up of two rocks balancing against each other. To the right of that one was one large rock hanging over the ground, casting a large shadow. To Nightstalk’s left was another rockden, up on a small ledge.
Confusion flushed over her. This wasn't right, not what she had imagined. She spun around, trying to see if she missed anything. Blazebright put his paw on her shoulder, and she stopped. Dizziness crept up on her, but she followed as Sergepelt and Alderhiss led the patrol towards the rock den across the camp.
“That was Chip’s den, where he healed and hid away during the day. He used to have a crazy beautiful den, but now it is all destroyed. Towards the end, Thorne punished him hard. For Vixenwhisper’s escape. For Cosmos’ death, and Eclipse’s capture. Things that were all beyond his power.” Sergepelt explained.
Nightstalk imagined in her head the den’s walls lined with herbs. Piles of covering leaves and cobwebs. She recalled Snowmask having a scab on his throat once or twice, and that his leg was covered in a thick binding of oak leaves before the Final Stand. He never spoke about his injuries. Ever.
“Over there is the Overhang. We slept there, or really where there was room. The camp tended to be packed at night.” Alderhiss added and pointed towards the hanging rock.
“Fitting name.” Blazebright commented, bringing his eyes to where the she-cat was pointing. Nightstalk shivered at the thought of her skin and fur laying against the cool rock during the nights. No moss, leaves or anything warm and soft. Must have been torture.
“And last but certainly not least: Thorne’s den.” Alderhiss proclaimed, turning towards the second den with the ledge. Nightstalk tried to imagine Thorne standing on it, looking down on her rogues. She found it hard. She had only ever seen her once, and that was during the Final Stand. The only real good look she had gotten was of her torn open corpse.
Below the ledge was a closed off space with a few sticks pointing up from the ground. One was snapped, both halves laying in the middle of the space, one tip charred black. Fire?
“That is The Snake Pit. We fought there. Snowmask fought there once, against Thorne.” Alderhiss explained, not extending her answer when Nightstalk gave her a questioning look. Nightstalk got shivers just thinking of that name. The Snake Pit. Could anything sound more horrifying?
Sergepelt sniffed around the ledge with Blazebright by his side. The pair leapt up it, quickly followed by Alderhiss. The golden Warrior was first to push inside the den. Nightstalk felt her heart drop as he did, somehow thinking that it would swallow him whole and never let him out again. Sergepelt was hastily after him. Before Alderhiss entered too, she looked back at Nightstalk.
“I’m good out here.” The deputy reassured and sat down as Alderhiss’ russet tail disappeared into the darkness of the den.
Alone, the deputy gazed around. Tried to imagine all the cats who lived here. Snowmask prancing about. Alderhiss too, and it also could have been Onestep, but he never got that far. But, the deputy found it hard to do so. Everything felt unreal. So false, when it was true. She found it hard to grasp.
She felt his name fill her mind. Snowmask. She missed him dearly. She regretted not being able to save him. To have him back as deputy, as a friend. He wouldn't get to be with Salmonfoot, to support her during her integration into the Clan, which Nightstalk guessed was hard for her. He wouldn't be there for the birth of their kit or kittens. To see them grow to an apprentice and learn the Warrior ways. Snowmask had missed his whole life, seen it blow past him like a leaf in the wind.
But, how much had Nightstalk accomplished in all this time Snowmask was away? She had ascended to deputyship, and it had been rocky ever since. Rumors, near- and not so near death experiences, lies and conspiracy. Murder.
There was the love. She had found Blazebright, seen him with true eyes for the first time since their apprenticeship. Her greatest treasure.
Then, it had all gone downhill. Nightstalk had reached the lowest bit of her life, almost starving herself to death. She was no good, for anyone. Yet, she was still the deputy of TorrentClan. But, did she really want that, or was she just making Snowmask happy by fulfilling his last wish?
She didn't know. That seemed to be the new normal right now.
Suddenly, the she-cat was jolted from her thoughts and her seat. She sprung to her paws, gazing around. Someone was there. Not in a physical, normal way. A ghost. Spirit. A StarClan cat was there, watching her. She called out, but got no answer. She saw nothing either, but felt it. It felt familiar.
Then, she recognized it. It was Snowmask, and Nightstalk gasped.
“Hi.” She whispered. His aroma swept her, sending shivers down his spine. She got no answer, but wasn't angry. She had longed for this. To feel him, to hold him. But, she couldn't. Nightstalk swiped her paws through the air, but got a hold of nothing. He wasn't really there.
In that moment, the rest of her patrol came out of Thorne’s den.
“Hey, did you find anything?” The deputy asked. At first she was going to burst out and mention Snowmask, but the three cats didn't seem to be sensing him, their faces blank and emotionless.
Blazebright was holding something in his paw. “Just this piece of glass with some dried blood on it.” The tom threw the glass from his place on the ledge and down towards Nightstalk. It landed on the ground and shattered into uncountable pieces. When it did, she felt Snowmask leaving, and a sigh of disappointment escaped her.
The patrol soon reached camp. Once they had stepped paw across TorrentClan’s “old” scent border, they had all relaxed. Except for Sergepelt, who always seemed calm. Nightstalk had gone to report back to Brookstar. She told of Snowy Glade, the Plaza, the North Bank, the cliffside and lastly Thorne’s den.
The leader was impressed, and promised to go soon and see for herself. When Nightstalk had nothing left to say about their adventure, Brookstar dismissed her with a flick of her ears, but the deputy didn't rise from her seat. There was one more thing on her mind.
“Sorry leader, but there’s something else that I want to ask.” Nightstalk began.
Brookstar nodded. “Go on.”
“Have you tried communicating with StarClan lately?”
A dark look befell the leader’s face. She no longer bothered putting on the mask, knowing that the deputy could see right through it. “I have, but I only see darkness. I only feel cold. Hear no whispers or words. The StarCave is empty, just like you said it would be.”
That was the answer Nightstalk had expected. “I just have this thought about Snowmask, and every other life that Thorne claimed. If they made it to StarClan or not.”
Brookstar almost laughed. “Nightstalk, all cats go to StarClan or the Dark Forest, and no-one from TorrentClan that Thorne’s rogues ever killed deserved to go to the Dark Forest.”
Nightstalk bit her tongue. “That’s the thing, not every cat has gone to either one of those places…” She didn't want to finish, hoping that her mink colored leader would catch on.
The leader sighed. “You are referring to Willowstone.”
Nightstalk nodded. “I have this fear that since StarClan abandoned us, they no longer accept our dead.”
“That's impossible, where would they go? The Dark Forest?”
“Well, where did Willowstone go?”
“I don't know, limbo?” Brookstar’s tone told Nightstalk that she no longer put any belief in the topic. In her eyes, it was impossible. But, when Nightstalk felt Snowmask before, it didn't feel like StarClan. It felt scarily similar to how it felt when Willowstone visited her, and whispered into her ear. And the rest of the patrol didn't notice Snowmask either. It was all very weird, unexplainable.
“I don't know Willowstone’s story or where she is or why. This is all new, Nightstalk, and I don't want you to go kicking up any conspiracies.”
“I would never-”
“I mean it, Nightstalk. TorrentClan doesn't need that. We need stability, not disbelief. Many are already doubting StarClan, we don't want them doubting you or each other, right?”
“No, leader.”
“And SplashClan will hear nothing of this Willowstone or anything that could lead them to think that StarClan have abandoned us, and that we too have abandoned them. Is that understood, deputy?”
“Yes, leader. Crystal clear.”
The deputy exited the leader’s den with a heavy heart. Was her leader distrustful of her? Would the respect and belief she had worked so hard to earn from her Clanmates be blown away? Just because she wanted to know the truth? If Snowmask didn't get into StarClan, then something needed to be done. If he somehow got cast out, or even got sent to the Dark Forest. Or, if he walked with Willowstone.
Regardless, Nightstalk knew one thing. She would not accept Snowmask walking anywhere but StarClan. That's what he deserved, no matter the things he had to do.
Blazebright sat waiting for his mate, a worried look appearing on his face as Nightstalk neared, deep in her thoughts. “Hey.” He whispered, bringing her back to reality.
“I need to do something tonight, will you come with me?” If Brookstar wasn't going to tell her anything, Nightstalk would just have to find out for herself.
“Of course, where are we going?” The tom replied.
“The StarCave, and we need to keep it low-key.”
Blazebright lifted an eyebrow. “Just so you know, if you plan on dumping a heavy problem on me tonight again, it would be nice with a heads up.”
Nightstalk looked up at him as a smile spread across his face. She wanted to shut him up with a kiss so bad, but couldn't, not with the Clan around.
As night fell over the forest and river, the Clan went to sleep. Nightstalk had reduced the number of guards by the entrance to camp down to only one again. So, when the pair quietly slipped by Cardinalpurr, there was no fuzz.
The forest was beautiful that green-leaf night. The moon was growing closer and closer to its full, plump shape. A Gathering was soon on the agenda, and that scared Nightstalk. The last one, she had been worried about facing Ashswipe after everything that happened during the Final Stand, but neither he or his Clan had shown up. Just a Warrior bearing message of his Clan leader’s absence due to sickness. Nightstalk didn't believe it. Something sinister was happening in RapidClan, she knew it. From the moment that Ashswipe had refused to let Nightstalk, Snowmask, Blazebright, and Onestep talk with Steamstar, she had known that something was up. Even more so after the violent deputy had set paw in Snowy Glade, and sided with Thorne, with no Steamstar in sight. Nightstalk didn't even know if the leader was still alive or if Ashswipe had ascended. Ashstar . The name was haunting to think about, so she didn't.
Nightstalk let herself loose in the night, just her and him. Like when they had scaled the cliff, danced in the moonshine. Not worried that anybody would see them. Kiss each other how much they liked. Say whatever without having to think it through before, as to not expose anything. If the deputy didn't think any better, the two would have been made official a long time ago. But, something was always in the way. First it was Thorne, needing to focus on bringing her down, and when she finally seemed to be disappearing, Ashswipe appeared. Revealing that she loved someone as deeply as she loved Blazebright would put him at risk. Make him a target, to hurt her.
That was something she would never allow, and she knew that he wouldn't either. Nightstalk suspected that cats like Ravendancer, Snowmask and Cardinalpurr had figured it out by themselves, but no-one ever asked. Everyone only seemed to imagine Nightstalk and Onestep together. Pth, what a nightmare.
The mates soon reached the slope that led down to the StarCave. They had been here before, but this time there were no insecurities, or questions, and absolutely no Spike. Just them.
“Let's go.” Nightstalk whispered. “We ain’t got all night.”
Inside the cavern, it was cold. Empty and lifeless. Just like it had been last time Nightstalk was there. The rock in the middle seemed more battered and worn, and it was still completely silent in there. So silent in fact, that Nightstalk heard her own paw pads against the smooth rock.
“So, care to explain what we are looking for?” Blazebright sat down.
“Before, in Thorne’s camp, I sensed Snowmask. He was there, in spirit. I couldn't touch or see him, but I knew he was there.” Nightstalk began. “But, it didn't feel like StarClan.”
She saw how Blazebright put on his thinking face, and then it clicked. “It felt like Willowstone.”
The deputy nodded. She turned around, facing the rock. “I just need to dive into StarClan, try and see if Snowmask is there or not.”
Blazebright’s paw was suddenly on her shoulder. “You know that they won't be there, right?”
“I have to try.” With those words, Nightstalk laid her delicate nose against the rock. If she did this a couple of moons ago, she would see bright white light, then be transported to StarClan’s territory. And she would see so many cats. Ones she would recognize. Maybe her father, or Wallowpaw. Oh, how she missed that bastard she-cat Wallowpaw. Focus .
Now, nothing happened. There was no bright light, only Blazebright’s warm paw, clinging onto her shoulder.
She tried again, and again. And then again.
Nothing.
Frustration ran through her. Why would StarClan do this? Why?
Nightstaaaalk…
The deputy whipped around at the mention of her name.
“Get away.” She whispered as her heartbeat sped up. She didn't need Willowstone. She didn't want her either. Everything was her fault. Everything.
Blazebright's comforting paw left its place on her shoulder. “Nightstalk what is going on? What's wrong?”
The deputy had her eyes stuck to the other side of the cave. There stood the starry shape of a walking mystery. Willowstone’s sharp, shiny eyes shone in the darkness. A smile, no, a smirk was broad on her face. Nightstaaaalk. Her lips didn't move as she called the deputy’s name.
“She’s here.” Nightstalk whispered to the tom beside her. He glanced around, but didn't seem bothered at all.
“What do you mean, there's no one here.”
What? Willowstone was literally a fox-tail away from her, staring. Was she hallucinating? Did Blazebright really not see her?
“What do you want?” Nightstalk sputtered the words from her lips. She had not seen or heard from Willowstone since the Final Stand, where she had chosen not to revive Snowmask when he finally had bested Thorne. “What do you want from me?”
Willowstone’s ears flickered back and forth, and she lifted a singular paw. With it, she pointed at the rock behind the TorrentClan deputy.
“You won't find any answers there, you know. You’ll find no StarClan, and definitely no Snowmask.” She chuckled.
“What do you mean?”
Willowstone didn't answer until Nightstalk repeated herself. “They rejected him.”
Nightstalk heard herself gasp, the sound echoing between the rock walls. She began to shake her head disbelievingly. “You’re lying.”
Willowstone started moving closer. “I am not. StarClan rejected your savior and greatest Warrior. They didn't let him in. They threw him out, discarded him like rotten prey. Torrentstar himself laughed in his face.”
“No, they didn't.” Nightstalk was now on the verge of tears. Her worst fear was becoming real.
“See, if even the cat who gave up everything to save his Clan didn't get his place with the ancestors in the river, what makes you think that a cat like Sandywhisker or Mothleaper did? How about you, Nightstalk. Do you deserve to go to StarClan any more than Snowmask did?”
“No.” She said so feebly, Willowstone didn't seem to hear.
“He’s not there.” Willowstone turned her eyes to the rock. “You won't find him anywhere even remotely related to StarClan. They have abandoned you, and you need to accept it.”
“Who are we to turn to then?” The deputy said, having regained her composure.
Willowstone tilted her head to the side. “Well, look at what's in front of you. Who helped Snowmask during his fight? Who brought him back to life time and time again? At that gathering, so long ago? Who helped him?”
Nightstalk winced at the memory.
“Who did?!” Willowstone demanded, her roaring voice shaking the walls.
“You did.” Nightstalk said, her gaze not wavering as he continued to hold it within the other she-cat’s starry eyes. “ You did .” She repeated. “Okay? You did everything for us. You ‘saved’ us, Willowstone. Is that what you want to hear? Oh you were so good, such a hero. Well, we didn't ask for you to be our goddamn hero, did we? You just came out of nowhere and claimed the title.”
The cocky look on Willowstone’s face started to fizzle away, the conversation clearly turning into something she was not expecting.
“I hate you Willowstone. I hate so much and in so many unexplainable ways. If I ever get the chance to law my paws over your stupid starry fur, I would rip it to shreds in the matter of seconds. If I had the choice to kill Ashswipe or you, it would be you. Oh, you would feel it. Willowstone the fucking Reincarnator.” The deputy hissed and snarled her way through the words. Words that she had kept inside of her for so long. When Thorne was gone, she thought that StarClan would return, but they didn't, and it seemed like they never would.
“Sure, you saved Snowmask, but you still let him die. You had him die over and over again just so that your little prophecy could play out just like how you wanted it to. Fuck you, and fuck StarClan. If you would have just brought him back that one last time, then-”
“Then, what Nightstalk?”
“Then I wouldn't be a deputy! I could just go back to how things were before Thorne.”
“You know that there was no going back.”
“You stole my life! You took my death away-”
“I saved you, Nightstalk.”
“It didn't fucking feel like saving. You are wrong , a defect. You are not supposed to exist.”
“Well, then I suppose that Snowmask is a defect too.”
“Yes, you turned him into one. You will not turn me too.” With those parting words, Nightstalk slashed her claws over Willowstone’s starry face, and the vision of her disappeared, leaving only the two Warriors in the cave.