Chapter Text
Hyuna.
Hyuna.
Hyuna.
That strange, unfamiliar ember blooming in his chest he couldn't very well pinpoint.
It was there, all of a sudden. Faint yet undeniably present. It was certainly a fragile, fleeting delusion — but in front of him, there were two people who had defied all odds and emerged from the smithereens of the ALNST final.
Two people, and of course, himself.
"What do you mean, "you'll go for the photoshoot"?" Mizi inquired, "I doubt you're in proper shape, mister. It's just a photoshoot, you'll have millions more."
Luka was unsure what to say. Rather, he was unsure how many disagreements the pink-haired fiend would tolerate before relentlessly beating him for the third time.
Ivan, though playfully, agreed, "I must say, Luka, I wonder what sort of what poison that was. You were never fond of photoshoots."
"That's no suprise, you could see it on his face in all those commercials." Mizi commented.
He had next to no idea what the two were trying to suggest. Why was his wellbeing an issue? Surprisingly, his face is intact. Is that not the only matter of concern?
Then again, he supposed these two were the polar opposites of Heperu.
Then again, were they really in charge of anything?
A large hand on his shoulder gently tugged him out from his thoughts. Back to the strange reality he cannot bring himself to accept.
"Luka," Ivan pressed on, flashing one of his signature close-eyed smiles, "I'm completely, thoroughly, entirely and thankfully unaware of what's possessed you. I appreciate the enthusiasm, but photoshoots... or quite literally anything, are out of the question, as of no-OWH!" Ivan's cheerful expression disappeared, and was replaced by indignance as Mizi scampered over and flicked the side of his face.
The black-haired youth gave his friend a wounded look.
The friend in question, oblivious, turned to Luka, clapping her hands together with a sense of finality he and Ivan had learnt not to argue with through separate experiences, some more traumatic than the other.
"He has... questionable ways of conveying his concern, but I guess he's delivered his message. And so have I," she paused, as if testing to see for interruptions. When there were none, she continued, adjusting her circular specs as she spoke. "I still think I'll get you out of here in no time, you just aren't ready yet."
"I feel perfectly fine." Luka objected. If Hyuna is out there, he may as well find her. If she isn't... he may as well get it over with.
"No, I don't believe you are," Mizi's smile was starting to look a little like a Cheshire cat's. Luka's que to not argue further. "You even got your age wrong. Dr. Marty just didn't say anything at the time."
I got my age wrong? Wasn't I... thirty? Or was it thirty-two? Thirty-three? Thirty seven, perhaps?
The days had all blurred together, amidst experiment upon experiment, performance upon performance, days upon nights...and countless training sessions leaving him breathless and dazed, it wasn't impossible he'd lost track his age.
Or... was something different here?
"You, are infact twenty-four." Mizi revealed, further clarifying, "Not thirty."
So. There was something different here.
"...twenty four, huh?" Luka repeated, somewhat dazed.
Ivan, in the meanwhile, seemed to struggle to contain his laughter, one hand over his mouth, shoulders shaking. "Hah... he guessed his age? Wrong? Skipped a few years, have we, Luka?"
Ivan's eyes fell to his wristwatch, and there something shameful about admitting the satisfaction that it brought Luka when panic graced his self-proclaimed groupmate's facial features.
It was also something different, exclusive to these strange new circumstances. Ivan had not once during his two rounds during alien stage, displayed much of any such genuine emotions. He remained an enigma on stage for the aliens' sake, and his own; just as Luka did. Just like Luka, he continued and continued still during his last moments, right before the tightrope snapped and he drowned in himself, dragging down with him the one he sought to protect.
And, just like Luka, he did it for someone else; for that someone else, he forfeited his own life and was willing to do the same every waking moment of the life he valued far lesser then he valued that someone, to the point it felt insignificant.
Here, it seemed there was an absence of that burden on Ivan's shoulders. The world felt lighter. It felt present, rather than an endless blur of days Luka forgot ever happened, for his own good or perhaps just because he had no reason to remember. There was... only one thing worth remembering.
There's something distinctly different about this place that Luka cannot seem to lay a finger on. Everything here is less ablur, and the colors clinging to him feel more saturated. It's almost a little distasteful, too sweet for his tongue having only tasted the bitterness of his upbringing and at best experienced the radiance of someone like the sun against his skin.
There is sunlight, but it's not the kind he's longing for.
And yet.
There is sunlight.
Hyuna.
She must be here. If she isn't, why does everything hold a little more significance again? If Ivan is alive and well, the same should be able to be said for Hyuna.
Why is it that he's fatefully encountered the two people he's least interested in?
"Ivan." Luka calls. His voice remains monotone, but his intentions may push him past that. "Please." He doesn't mention exactly what, but Ivan, who is in the process of settling his tawny coat over his shoulders once again, guesses correctly in light of their recent discussion.
"Is this because Hyuna will be there?"
The name slips so casually past his lips, Luka cannot afford to comprehend it for a second and a half. "...Hyuna...? She's-?"
Alive.
The three decades he's spent under a grotesque sort of training, hooked to wires and wrapped in cold metal. Every time his heartbeat had ceased, every time the ever present pulse in his chest went silent under Heperu's cold gaze, as if frozen.
Then he'd wonder if he's dead, or if he's ever been alive because it felt too jarringly different from functioning but far too similar to being alive.
It made him wonder if he's every truly lived, or if perhaps everything has always been lies he's made to keep himself sane.
Then everything would go still, except Luka himself. Because he's tumbling across the cold floor drenched in sweat, clutching his loose silvery robes. Heperu would be unconcerned, he would only observe the spectacle his pet makes of himself, and by extension, his guardian aswell.
"This is how it feels when you die, Luka. I doubt it's a pleasant feeling. You don't want that, do you?"
A pause wherein nothing is said, as Heperu continues to watch. Not that Luka was in a condition to hear. Rather, right now, he's only capable of fear.
Instilling fear, and removing it all the same.
Such is what Heperu wishes to accomplish with his pet; according to him it was a key aspect to crowning Luka the ruler of the stage. When Luka presses his hand to his heart, he cannot feel it beating; that silence unlike any other, the silence of the ever-present beating of his heart he'd always taken for granted. Up until that warm pulse ceased.
And when Heperu had finished his observations and finally deemed his pet had learnt his lessons, only then did that cruel silence leave. Only then did the pulse of his aorta return.
When it did finally return, it was overwhelming. Terrifying, even. It only served to elevate his fear. Yet he felt he could breathe, and he felt, even if only for a short time before the world became monotone again, alive.
it's the only way Luka can describe how he felt when Ivan casually uttered Hyuna's name, as if she's alive.
Like everything made sense again, at last. She'd only been gone for a day, but it seemed she was back again.
It seemed Luka had some good fortune after all.
☼︎
"Please, it was pretty obvious you had a crush on her," Ivan teased, "well, maybe not as obvious as Mizi and Sua, but hey, you get what I mean."
"Ivan." Mizi, exasperated, covered her face, which was strangely tinted rose, which is probably due to vasodilation, though Luka hadn't really seen it happen to anyone before until now. He supposed he might not be looking very different from the rouge-haired lady right now, because for some reason there's also heat rising to his own cheeks.
"I mean, Luka, it's impossible not to notice. You're always looking at her, dreaming up cute fantasies. If I'm not thirdwheeling around Mizi and Sua, I'm stuck with you two." Ivan barged on, unable to help himself on the topic.
Ah. So this is the reason he's feeling this way. Hyuna is alive, and aquainted with him in this reality as well.
And yes, he's come to terms with the fact that this is most probably a different reality altogether. It's the only plausible explanation, but Luka still fails to wrap his head around an idea so inexplicably absurd.
A new world altogether, aswell as a new him.
And with it came a second chance. What could he have possibly done to deserve such a thing?
The sound of the room door creaking open. A new hope aswell, it seems.
Ivan stood infront of the ajar door, hands buried in the pockets of his trenchcoat, the vague smile plastered on his face that Luka had yet to get used to, given the shadowy enigma in place of this joyful young man in his world.
It was time to lessen his own burden aswell — he couldn't help but struggle to suppress the bubbles rising in his chest at the idea of Hyuna, alive and well.
"Luka? Shall we?" Ivan held out a hand, not to offer to Luka but more as an encouragement.
He only nodded in response, unable to muster many words - he still had questions, many of them, but they could come after. Ivan had ultimately been convinced to bring along his newly-recovered groupmate to the photoshoot. Mizi had also, even if reluctantly, agreed, and after a few more checkups from Marty and herself, they allowed him to leave.
"If I bring you along, Luka, I won't get in trouble for getting late. Probably."
"Let's leave already."
After bidding Mizi farewell, he and Ivan slipped into the back of a shiny black car, quite fancy even for Luka's taste, even after being wrapped in extravagant silks during his time in ALNST.
Ivan chatted all the way, unable to stop himself as per usual. However, Luka didn't mind much. This topic was of relevance to him.
"Hyuna's actually one of the actors of the new show we'll be working on. The production hasn't started yet because they were willing to move heaven and earth to cast you, but then you were poisoned." Ivan explained.
Luka signalled for him to continue.
"This is an event for it's premiere. Perhaps, now that you're seemingly all good, your replacement will be recasted with you. Especially since that role is pretty big-" He paused breifly, "So all of the actors will be there. Including me . . . and Hyuna."
He feels Ivan's gaze lingering on him at the mention of her name.
"Is Hyuna... okay?" Luka can't help but ask.
"Of course she is. You were the one who got poisoned. No questions on that?"
"No." He was simply glad he knew now that Hyuna was, indeed, okay.
He looked to his right at Ivan, leaning on the backseat, one hand strewn over the armrest, expression unreadable, bangs over his eyes.
"You are strange, Luka." He spoke up after a bit, and then looked back outside the window. "Aaaaand now we've reached."
Outside, there were so many people. Not a single segyein; a sight Luka had yet to get used to. It was an outdoor setup, but aside from that and the absence of their perpetrators, it wasn't all too different from the photoshoot setups he had attended. The painstaking flashing lights in his eyes he was all too familiar with.
He felt the cold chill of doubt pricking the nape of his neck.
A reminder.
A reminder to never forgot the silence of his heart.
The unknown man driving the car stepped out to open the door of the backseat wherein he and Ivan were seated. Luka was used to being a precious object - in the hands of one that had far too many such gems to care for a single diamond.
This diamond shined the brightest, however, so it was polished perhaps more thoroughly because its shine was its only concern. They don't break easily, after all; it could be tossed around like a worthless ingot at no one's expense.
Being treated with such courtesy was yet another thing Luka is unused to.
The young man holding the door open grunts, displeased, leading him to realize he's been in a dazed for a good few moments. Hesitating only breifly, he steps out, Ivan following suit behind him.
Outside, they are immediately swarmed by crowds upon crowds of humans, a few holding up microphones as they barraged them with inaudible questions in the commotion.
Luka doesn't flinch. Neither does Ivan. In his past life, or this one, both of them have learnt to conceal their true emotions with more palatable ones.
Having pushed through the car with the help of their driver, Ivan stops breifly to look back at Luka.
"There's someone here you've been wanting to see, I presume? Well, I'll take you right to her."
Her.
Luka wanted to run, run as fast as his trembling legs might allow.
"Please do so, then," Is all he could manage, barely maintaining his outward composure. "...I'd like to see her." Ivan only seemed vaguely amused, but complied nonetheless.
The sable-haired man cheerfully led Luka through smaller crowds, across red carpets and other sets of familiar faces. They passed several photoshoots and interviews, almost making Luka wonder what happened to Ivan's own plans.
Except nothing could ever take Luka's dazed mind off the women now infront of him.
She had brilliant tanned skin that reminded him of the sun he's been so far from, rich, long dark hair brushing her waist, gunmetal eyes with deeper cerulean hues he was capable of drowning in, and a stature a little above his own.
Instead of the hood that obscured her face; the dark coloured clothes wrapped loosely around her frame the day she died, she donned a carmine dress with ruffles at its neckline, paired with the dainty golden chains loosely hung around her neck.
Her eyes lit up when she saw him.
Her eyes lit up when she saw him.
"Hyuna." Her name ghosts out of his lips, as if he couldn't bare to think this was real. She was too good to be real.
This must all be a cruel lucid dream.
"Luka!" And when she says his name so excitedly, she sounds like the little girl she once was in Anakt garden all those years ago. He almost expects her to pull out a Rubik's cube, and challenge him to solve it.
And he'd do it, for her.