Chapter Text
The sound of Woongki's morning alarm rang through the air and split through his ears, jolting him out of his sleep. A dream oh so sweet about that boy he'd been crushing on for the last six or so months cut short. Too short.
It was just getting good..
He thought with a small pout on his lips as his eyes fluttered open.
The alarm cycle restarted again and Woongki groaned, finally sitting up to grab his phone off the night stand, clamoring to turn it off.
Ah. 7:30AM.
Shuaibo and Seowon are gone already… I guess I snoozed my alarm too many times..
Woongki shakes his head, pulling the blanket off of himself, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. Carefully, he scoots to the edge, hopping down onto the floor. The bright light shining through the window reached his eyes and he flinched, rushing to shut the blinds.
Ouch.
He walks over, looks at himself in the mirror and sighs. He looks like shit. His hair was a glitery mess, lipstick smudged all over his face, dark circles under his eyes, and on top of it all— he'd totally spilled something all over his sweater. And god, he had no idea what.
"Jesus.." Woongki whispered to himself, sucking in a deep breath before shaking his head.
No time.
He thought.
Woongki grabs the oh so dreaded emergency makeup wipes from one of the drawers on his desk-turned vanity and quickly wipes away all the makeup on his face.
He thanked whatever gods had blessed him the night before with the hindsight to have layed out an outfit for the day before crashing and gets changed quickly.
I'm still good on time…
Maybe I could stop by my favorite cafe nearby..
Woongki's face lights up a little at the thought of getting a delicious pastry before class. On one hand, that sounded amazing. On the other hand.. perhaps there were better ways to spend his time.
He shakes his head.
His stomach growls.
Food it is.
Woongki swung his bag over his shoulder and did a quick glance inside of it to see that he had all his things before heading out of the dorms.
The cool air wraps around him quickly as he pushes the door open to leave the building and it causes a shiver to run up his spine. But Woongki was too stubborn to turn back, so he hugged his arms around himself and decided to push through the cool morning air.
Thankfully for him, the walk is brief; the cafe was just around the corner. No more than a four to six minute walk, especially if he was quick on his feet, which he was. The walk was short enough for him to not absolutely freeze his ass off, but long enough for him to loop 'Honey or Spice' by LIGHTSUM twice. He was satisfied with that.
Admittedly, the music hadn't at all helped his splitting headache. Still, he blasted it the whole way there. Not too loud or anything, but he'd forgotten his headphones. When he stopped in front of the cafe, he turned the volume on his phone down and paused the music before walking up to the door, gently pulling it open.
It looks different than the last time I was here…
Woongki looked around the cafe silently, taking in the new scenery. The seating had been rearranged- some of it swapped out for an even cozier look than before. Notably, things had been a lot greener. Literally. There were plants everywhere. Warmer lighting.
More importantly than anything, however, was who Woongki spotted behind the counter when his eyes finally landed in that direction.
Oh my god— the universe is on my side.
Thank you to whatever holy spirit set this up for me, from the bottom of my heart.
After staring for a few minutes, Han looked up and met Woongki's eyes, offering a polite smile and nod. Woongki smiles back before looking away quickly— God I'm nervous.
Why am I even nervous?
Just go and order the damn croissant.
Woongki walks closer to the counter, standing in front of the menu. He pretends to examine it for.. way longer than he should have been. Sure, he had a bit of time to kill before class— but not that much time.
Snapping himself out of it, he checks to make sure nobody is behind him before stepping up to the register.
"Your outfit."
My outfit?
Woongki looks up at Han in surprise, eyes shifting around awkwardly. "…Yes?"
Han shifts awkwardly behind the counter. It's his turn to look down, the tips of his ears burning red. "It's on your body."
There's a pause.
A long pause.
Oh my god.
"I mean… yeah? Where it should be."
Han cringes at himself and curses himself internally. Fucking idiot.
"No I know its just…" He pauses, biting his lower lip in thought as his eyes shift around awkwardly.
"…Anyways… I'm Woongki." The other introduces himself, offering Han a warm smile. As if to give their interaction a fresh start.
Han scoffs a little, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "Yeah, I think we're acquainted already."
Woongki gives Han a confused look, tilting his head to the side slightly as his tongue poked out in thought. How does he know..?
"Ah! I remember…" Woongki trails off for a second, smile growing wider. "We finally met, last night, right?" He asked, smiling. "Sorry I wasn't able to catch you after!"
It was Han's turn to be confused. He clicks his tongue and shakes his head, squinting a little. "NO— no it's fine. I.. um. No, really." He gulps, looking away from Woongki awkwardly, the tips of his ears burning red.
"No, really, Actually- I'd sort of planned to ask if you ever wanted to hang out together after we spoke.. but, I didn't get the chance to— I was really excited to hang out with my friends. You understand though, right, Hani?"
"Hani?" He repeats.
Woongki nods a little and he smiles a little wider, in a sort of way that makes Han feel like he's having heart palpitations.
Hans tongue flicks over his lower lip and he lets out a shaky breath before swallowing. "Can I take your order?" He blurts out, not entirely sure how to respond to Woongki's nickname for him. Not that he'd felt unpositively towards it. Just nervous.
For a moment, a small pout appears on Woongki's face, though he wills it away quickly, Han still notices. He wants to lean over the counter and kiss it away.
"Um.. Hey, it's okay if you-" Han starts, standing up a little bit straighter, eyes darting around, trying to find anything but Woongki to focus on.
"Could I just get a croissant?" Woongki asked, sighing deeply as he reached into his bag to pull out his wallet, cutting Han off mid sentence.
Han is taken aback, but, he bites his lip and nods his head a little, tapping at the screen in front of him on the register quietly.
Woongki, on the other hand has suddenly gained this look of total bewilderment on his face.
Where is my wallet?
This cannot be happening to me.
"Is that all?" Han asked, looking up from the screen.
"Yeah— but just a sec." Woongki mumbled, doing his very best to maintain a calm, collected exterior. He was failing. He trembled anxiously as he sifted through his things, one hand clenching his bag tightly.
"₩2500" Han relayed.
"... Sorry." Woongki said letting out a sigh. His shoulders tense up as he looks up. "Can I..?" He asks, looking at Han briefly before setting his bag on the counter. He hadn't looked at him long enough to see if he had nodded, nor had he been able to listen well enough to hear if he'd said 'yes.' He stands there, silently digging through his bag for a while, pulling things out one by one.
Han notices him pull out one power bank. And then another. Another. One more.
Isn't this excessive?
Another one.
"Hey— if you don't have it, that's fine." Han speaks up after a moment in a way that he intends to come across kindly. However, Woongki's already anxious mind takes it as a dig at the way he is being percieved in this moment.
"I am not poor." Woongki replies sharply, freezing in his tracks and tilting his head up again to meet Han's eyes. His eyebrows furrowed a little, pout evident on his face.
Han quickly looks away, heat rushing up his neck.
"I didn't mean.. it's just, you have no money. Right?" Han says it before he has a chance to really think over what he means to communicate. He glances back to Woongki, looking away when they lock eyes again.
"I have money." Woongki scoffs in disbelief, his jaw hanging open. After a beat, he starts putting his things back into his bag, shaking his head a little. He couldn't believe this guy that he'd been crushing on from afar for so long would be so rude. What did he do to deserve this treatment? Seriously?
"No, I know— it's just that right now, well, obviously you don—" Woongki tilts his head to the side and Han quickly shuts his mouth, pressing his lips into a firm line. He starts silently packaging Woongki's croissant, writing something on the inside of the box before closing it and sliding it across the counter.
Woongki looks down at the box, then back up at Han, confused.
"Take it."
He laughs nervously, looking around.
"That's not fair, though. I didn't pay."
Han pulls his wallet from his pocket and quickly swipes his own card through the machine. There's a chime that plays when the payment is confirmed.
"You didn't have to do that—"
Han shakes his head a little. "It's the least I could do, you know. Since we're like.." He trails off, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. He pokes his tongue out slightly out of habit, his eyes wandering around the room as he thinks of what to say.
"We?" Woongki says suddenly, drawing Han's attention back to him. Han nods a little, he's smirking a little bit— not on purpose.
"Seriously?" Woongki asks, grabbing the box.
Han looks surprised now, face twisting into an expression so unreadable Woongki wanted to scream.
"You think you can buy me a pastry and suddenly, there's a we?"
Han shakes his head quickly. "No! No, it's not like that— Not the pastry, at least, I mean like— there is, right?"
"Oh my gosh, I actually can't even believe this— Of course, you think I'm easy too. " He rolled his eyes before looking down at his phone. "Fuck my life, I'm gonna be late."
"I don't.. think you're easy..!" Han struggles out awkwardly, shaking his head violently. He swore he could feel the hair on the back of his neck standing up.
Woongki squints at him. "Right, thanks." There's an edge of sarcasm that Han doesn't quite pick up on.
"No problem." Han replies, his voice is a bit softer and theres a kind, honest smile on his face as he looked across the counter at Woongki.
Woongki pressed his lips together, looking at Han with an insincere smile. "Mm."
Han nods again, looking down at the floor in front of him, spinning around on his heel to busy himself with something else. His very own pathetic attempt at trying to deflect the unpleasant feeling in the air that seemed to be suffocating him suddenly.
I should ask..
No.
I really shouldn't.
"Hey, about last night-" Han starts against his better judgement, whipping around.
The spot that had once been filled by Woongki was now empty. The door bell jingled, drawing his attention over. By the time his eyes landed on it though, Woongki was already walking past the window. His steps rigid.
Han lets out a shaky breath, chewing anxiously on his lower lip. His stomach felt tight with uncertainty. The feeling of knowing he had said something wrong, but not knowing what. He mulls it over in his head, again and again and again.
Han felt guilty for not feeling guilty about anything that he had said.
That bothered him.
A lot.
The next time Han sees Woongki is later that same day. He's in the quad, surrounded by people Han knew but only knew from afar, people whose names he'd familiarized himself with, but he couldn't say the same if it were the other way around. Together they laugh and they smile. Han's heart aches just a little and then it fills with something warm when Woongki finally looks in his direction.
Oh.
"Wonie!"
Han jerks his head around to see Seowon, walking towards Woongki and his group of friends.
So.. not me.
Right.
Han puffs air into his cheek, eyebrows furrowed together a little.
Maybe I should just go up to him.
Maybe he just doesn't see me.
That's gotta be it.
He just doesn't see me.
He brushes his hair out of his face a little and needlessly readjusts the strap on his bag before mustering up the courage to walk towards Woongki and his friends.
When he gets there he wordlessly plops himself down right next to Woongki and unzips his bag, pulling out a small, unlabeled ziploc bag of gummy bears. A peace offering.
He opens the bag and pulls a few out, holding his palm out towards Woongki, looking at him like a wounded animal.
He's surpised when Woongki takes his hand and closes his palm, pushing it away. Firm but gentle.
"I don't do edibles."
Well, that wasn't entirely true, not entirely false, either. He had.. in the past. Socially.
Han tilts his head in confusion, blinking rapidly as he processed what Woongki had just told him.
"That's not possible."
"..I think I would know."
"Well, how would you sustain yourself? You need food to survive, right? I mean, that's basic knowledge, I'm sure. Actually, I even saw you eat earlier. A croissant. Right? I made it. Kinda. I wrapped it. I didn't bake it.. but, I gave to you. And I paid for it. Then you kinda got mad? But, don't worry- I understand. It was rude of me to.. assume your finances. I'm sorry. Actually, I came to apologize. I don't think you're easy. Or poor. If you were easy and poor though I would totally be willing to work with that, though—"
Han cuts himself off when he hears the rustling around him and realizes all of Woongki's friends were silently getting up to leave. Woongki doesn't move though, he looks at Han intently, waiting for him to finish.
Even if Woongki wasn't the biggest fan of what he was hearing, he had enough decency to hear him out— or at least try to.
"You talk a lot." Woongki says, eyes a little wide.
"I'm sorry." Han ducks his head down, rising his shoulders, his general shyness taking over him suddenly.
"I talk a lot too." Woongki says quickly, shaking his head. "Don't apologize."
He pauses for a beat, sucking in a deep breath before huffing and holding his hand out to Han.
Han grabs it, interlocking their fingers.
"Uh. I meant the gummy bears."
"Right. Sorry." Han quickly unlaces his fingers from Woongki's and drops the gummy bears into his hands.
Woongki inspects them carefully before popping them into his mouth, Han watches, resting his hands on his knees, shoulders pushed forward.
"Are you still mad at me?" Han asks suddenly, catching Woongki off-guard.
"What?"
"Earlier, you were upset. I can't really see why, but I'm sorry. You know, if it was about like- the money thing, or the.. I don't know— like I said, I don't think you're easy, so I don't know why you would be upset about that but.. whatever." Han says, eyes flicking away, blowing a piece of hair that fell in front of his eyes away. He had this terrible habit of letting his tone get too rigid and out of his control when he felt nervous. He hadn't meant to come across so condescending, it just happened.
When Han doesn't hear a response for a while, his eyes flick back over to wher Woongki had been sitting beside him.
Gone again.
"I'm sure he didn't mean it like that." Seowon says, stroking Woongki's hair gently, looking down at his lap to see Woongki's signature pout. Woongki rolls his eyes, turning his head away to avoid eye contact. Stubborn Seowon thinks, shaking his head a little.
"No, he definitely meant it that way. You didn't stick around, so you didn't hear it but- I swear. His voice became so like.. I don't know!" Woongki sits up, leaning back on his hands, cheeks puffed out in frustration, eyebrows knit together angrily. "Like, he apologized for making me think that he thought that I was easy even though he didn't actually think that and I just jumped to conclusions about that entirely- are you following?" Seowon nods. "Right, so anyways, he apologized for that.. but then he had to finish it with some bullshit like 'I don't know why you would be upset about that but whatever' I mean— just fucking rude, right? Ridiculous!"
Seowon sucks in a deep breath, fighting the urge to laugh a little at his best friends crisis. Woongki doesn't notice this, luckily for Seowon. He'd like to keep his head today, thanks.
"So I take it your feelings about him have changed since last night."
"Last night?" Woongki asks, tilting his head to the side curiously. This catches Seowon offguard, the confusion. He doesn't mention it, though. Just assumes it has something to do with this newfound 'Park Han is dead to me' thing Woongki has going on.
"I mean.. if you're talking about my like, campus crush thing I had going on. You guys were right, totally stupid of me to become so infatuated with him without knowing anything about him. I can't believe I spent so long building this version of him in my head that was so sweet and romantic just for him to be.. a jerk." Woongki rambles, pouting a little.
"Hey, he's not that bad—"
"Yeah right, he literally—"
"He's just a little bit awkward, socially. Jeongwoo says he's really nice, so I encourage you to give it another chance."
Woongki looks over at Seowon, perplexed.
"What, so you're on his side?"
"I'm not taking sides. I'm just saying, maybe you're jumping to conclusions. So, you got off on the wrong foot today— you haven't been totally perfect your entire life. Let's say maybe he was having a bad day, maybe he said a few things in a way he didn't mean them. You've done that too, right? We all have."
There's a long string of silence that fills the air for a while.
Then a sigh.
"He's like, really cute." Woongki says finally.
Seowon snorts.
"What— what did I say?" Woongki whines, hitting Seowon playfully.
"Nothing, sorry— hey!" He shoves Woongki playfully, maybe too playfully and knocks him straight out of the chair he had been sitting in. Almost.
He doesn't hit the ground, instead, he is stopped by a pair of cold hands, and gently pushed back onto to the seat fully. Woongki turns his head to see Han standing there with his lips pressed into a thin line, avoiding eye contact.
"Hey. Than-"
"Don't mention it." Han's reply comes quickly, sharply. He's pacing away before Woongki can even reply. Deep down, Woongki wants to chase after him and talk. He doesn't though, he doesn't even know what he wanted to talk about. Maybe he wanted to apologize. For making assumptions. Another part of him felt that those assumptions were correct, though.
But maybe, they weren't.
Maybe Seowon was right, maybe they'd just gotten off on the wrong foot.
Maybe Han was just being short with him now because he had been dismissive of Han.
Maybe that made his stomach churn a little, the idea that things maybe were fine- but he messed them up. This was new to him. The prospect that someone may have disliked him, and maybe he knew why. Ignorance truly was bliss, Woongki would pay to be ignorant right now if he could.
"You're making that face, again." Seowon said, brushing some of Woongki's hair behind his ear.
"I'm an asshole."
"No, you're not!"
"What if you were right, though? What if he really was just having a shitty day. What if I just came in and stomped all over him and made it worse?"
"I'm sure that's not what happened."
"I mean, think about it— he even came up to me to apologize. But, I let my own ego get in the way and focused too much on the wording, and not enough on the fact that he had the decency to apologize to me for the misunderstanding."
"I mean.."
"So you agree, I was being a dick." Woongki whines, pulling his knees up to his chest, burying his face away. "Stupid, stupid, stupid. I'm so stupid."
"Hey— it's okay! It's nothing you two can't talk out."
"Did you see him just now? He wouldn't even let me finish saying thank you!"
"He could have been running late to one of his classes, it's cutting awfully close to 3pm." Seowon offers, hoping to instill any sense of rationality into Woongki at this point in time. "Are you crying?"
Woongki sniffs, shaking his head. "Why would I cry? That's so stupid to cry over."
But he was, there were tears silently spilling down his cheeks.
"You're crying, hey, it's fine it's so so so oka-"
"He's so hot." Woongki blurts out, doubling over, gripping his hair in frustration.
"What?"
"And— he was so nice to me today. He paid for my food, but all I could focus on was him thinking I was poor! He didn't even call me poor, he just said I didn't have money on me. He was right! I didn't!"
"Oh, Woongki.."
"I'm so mean. Seriously. So mean." Woongki throws his head down again and he's full blown sobbing. "It's not even so terrible for someone to think I'm poor. Since when am I such a classist asshole, oh my gosh. So many people are poor!"
"Hey, it's fine. Seriously. You need to calm down, this is nothing you need to be getting all worked up about!" Seowon said, rubbing Woongki's back gently. "How about this, let's go back to the dorms, right? Maybe your lack of sleep is getting to you, and it'll all be better after you get some rest."
Woongki's breathing slows down finally and he sits up, nodding a little, wiping his tears.
"You're right. I just need to sleep." Woongki said before shakily standing up and gathering his things.
"Here, I'll carry your things for you."
"You don't have to do that…" Woongki starts, going to grab his things. Then, he perks up a bit and stops himself. "Well. Okay~"
Seowon giggles a little at his instant change in demeanor before gathering both of their things and holding his arm out for Woongki to link his own around.
The next time Seowon sees Han is at his evening improv class later that afternoon; he's sitting alone, not unlike he did the previous semester during their musical-theater club. Still, it tips Seowon off at least a little bit. Maybe it was pity.
After contemplating it for a minute, he takes it upon himself to plop down in the seat right next to him. Han was hunched over, shoulders tensed up, picking at his nails quietly, anxiously.
"You know that's bad for you, right? You should try to avoid developing that habit." Seowon said suddenly, catching Han's attention. He perks up a bit, it's clear that he hears Seowon. However, to Seowon's dismay, Han just doesn't respond.
Okay. Brush it off, try again.
"I'm Seowon, by the way!"
Finally, Han looks at him, nodding firmly. "I know." His lips press into a thin line. "We've been in the same musical theater club for the past two years."
I actually only noticed him last year. Seowon cringes internally.
"Right, of course. I just- thought I'd introduce myself. I don't think we ever properly introdu-"
"We were scene partners?"
"Right. No, sorry. I just- you know what I mean?"
"I don't."
Seowon sighs, shifting his weight a bit in his seat.
"Let's start over."
Han doesn't respond.
"Okay, what I meant to say was I'm a friend of Woongki's!"
"Yeah, I know that, too."
This time, it's Seowon who doesn't respond right away.
"I'm not trying to be rude, if it's coming across that way." Han says awkwardly, turning to look at Seowon finally, dropping his hands down to his side and awkwardly gripping at the seat. "Seriously."
"Actually, that's why I wanted to talk to you."
"It is?"
Seowon nods. "My friend.. he seems to be a bit worried that you two got off on the wrong foot and that it was his fault."
"Wrong foot?" Han inquires, a curious pout on his face. His eyes dart around the room as he mulls it around in his head, almost cartoonishly. "I don't know that I agree."
"That's what I thought too, he's been freaked out all day- honestly, I think it's just sleep deprivation getting to him."
Han looks perplexed for a moment, before cocking his head to the side and biting his tongue a bit, a small smirk turning at the corners of his lips.
"I understand now."
"You do? That's ama-"
"He must be feeling shy. We're kind of lovers now, didn't you know?"
Seowon chokes.
"What?"