Chapter Text
“Everything is packed, Kanade.”
She turned to see her father sitting on the edge of the bed.
“The doctor said the paperwork is finished,” Kanade said softly. She reached down and picked up a suitcase. “Mochizuki-san is waiting downstairs with a taxi.”
Her father stood up. He moved slowly across the room.
He looked at the empty bed, then at his daughter.
“It’s been a long time,” he murmured. “I’m ready to go home.”
The taxi ride was quiet. Kanade watched the world blur past the window.
The world outside was filled with neon signs, crowded crosswalks, and parks filled with people who were simply living their lives. Usually, these made her head spin, but today, she felt relaxed.
She felt the thick wool of her cardigan against her wrists. She felt the steady vibration of the car’s engine through the soles of her shoes. And most importantly, she felt the warmth of her father sitting beside her.
When they arrived at the house, Honami was already there, holding the door open. Honami had spent the morning polishing the wood and airing out the rooms.
“Welcome home,” Honami said with a smile and a respectful bow.
Kanade’s father stepped over the doormat. He stopped in the kitchen, his eyes wandering over the walls.
He touched a dusty framed photo of Kanade as a child. His fingers left a clean trail on the glass.
“It’s smaller than I remember,” he said. “Or maybe I’ve just been away too long.”
“I’ll make some tea,” Kanade said. She walked into the kitchen, the linoleum clicking under her feet. She picked up the kettle, filled it with water, and let it boil.
Later that afternoon, a knock came at the door.
Ah… Mafuyu must have came back from visiting her parents already.
Kanade went to open it and found what she expected. Mafuyu was standing there, but right by beside her was a tall man with tired eyes and a professional air.
“Thanks for having me,” Mafuyu’s father said politely. He held a small gift box in both of his hands.
The two fathers sat on the kitchen chairs. Kanade and Mafuyu stood together, by the counter, preparing plates for lunch.
The house was filled with the low, rumbling sound of men talking.
“I heard from my daughter that you were a composer,” Mafuyu’s father said.
“I was,” Kanade’s father replied. “And I hope to be again. But for now... I’m just learning how to be a father again.”
“Here,” Mafuyu’s father held out the gift box towards the other man. “They’re tea leaves, Chamomile specifically. It helps with relaxation.”
“Ah… Thank you.” Kanade’s father smiled.
The other man smiled in return.
Mafuyu, who had been measuring sugar, paused.
Her gaze drifted toward the kitchen table. She looked back at Kanade.
“Kanade,” Mafuyu whispered. “Your house... it feels warm.”
“Because people are in it,” Kanade smiled.
A few days later, the house had settled into a rhythm. Her father had his first weekly checkup, and his prognosis was good. The doctor had been surprised at his results, he said it was a recovery that “defied the clinical expectations of a long-term collapse”.
She’s glad he’s getting better.
While she was cleaning, Kanade watched him from the kitchen as he sat in the armchair, reading a book she gifted him. She couldn’t help but smile a bit at the sight.
She just finished washing the dishes, now she’ll clean a bit before she leaves to buy flowers for her mother.
After all, she’s promised herself that she would visit her soon.
As Kanade moved to wipe down the counter, her mind drifted back to the supermarket from last week. She could still see the white carnations in the flower corner.
The image of the white flowers pulled her back to the park.
The pond.
The memory hit her like a sudden drop in temperature. She could almost feel the weight of her soaked clothes, the way the water reached for her ankles and almost swallowed her whole.
She squeezed the cloth in her hand, her knuckles turning white. She jerked her head sharply, as if she could physically shove the memory back into the dark corners of the past where it belonged.
She’s here now. She’s in the kitchen. The sun is out.
Kanade reached into her pockets, and pulled out her phone. The screen glowed with the Niigo group chat.
Amia
look at this!!!
cat_with_pink_bow.jpg
i saw it and i thought of enanan!
ฅ(^•ω•^ฅ)
Enanan
Mizuki i will actually block you
i dont look like that.
Amia
uehhh?
but the ears look like you!!
admit it!
Enanan
shut up
im trying to draw but your notifs are shaking my tablet!
Amia
can i watch you draw during our date todayy
Enanan
no
Amia
(╥﹏╥)
wahhh youre so mean enaemon!!!
Her thumb hovered over the keyboard. Her heart hammered against her ribs. She wanted to be honest. She didn’t want to save anymore, she wanted to have a friend by her side.
I have something to tell you guys.
Deleted.
I’ve been keeping something from you.
Deleted.
Kanade stared at the blank text box.
The things she wanted to say felt too heavy to say on text. She wanted to face them, but the timing felt like a fragile glass vase she didn’t want to shatter.
With a soft sigh, Kanade turned off her phone and set it on the counter.
She couldn’t say it now. Not yet.
Kanade walked down the hallway, her footsteps soft on the wood. She stopped in front of the door. She raised her hand, hesitating for a second, before knocking on the door.
“Mafuyu?”
She heard a few footsteps until, a few seconds later, Mafuyu opened the door.
“Kanade,” Mafuyu said. “Is something wrong?”
“No,” Kanade said. “I was just… thinking about carnations. And that night at the park.”
Mafuyu stepped back, allowing Kanade to enter the room.
“I think about it too,” Mafuyu admitted, sitting on the edge of the bed. “The rain was very cold.”
Kanade sat beside her on the bed, their shoulders were nearly touching.
“I wanted to tell Ena and Mizuki,” Kanade said, looking down at her lap. “But I couldn’t.“
Mafuyu looked at her own hands. “You don’t have to tell them everything right now. You’re allowed to have things that are just yours.”
“I know,” Kanade said. “But… I don’t want to hide anymore.”
“If I’m going to live…” Kanade continued. “I don’t want to hide in my songs anymore, I want to be honest.”
Mafuyu was silent for a long moment. Then, she reached out and briefly touched the skin of Kanade’s wrist. “Then tell them tonight, I’ll be there.”
“Thank you, Mafuyu.” Kanade smiled.
Mafuyu didn’t reply, instead she squeezed Kanade’s wrist reassuringly.
“Oh yeah… Mafuyu, I’m going out later.” Kanade said. “Would you... like to come with me? To the florist?”
“The florist?” Mafuyu said. “Why?”
“I want to buy carnations. So I can take them to see my mother with my father this weekend.“ Kanade replied. “And… I thought it would be nice if you were there with me.”
“Okay.” Mafuyu agreed. “Let me get ready first.”
The walk to the station was loud and bright, but Kanade let the sun hit her face. When they reached the florist, the air was filled with the scent of damp earth and nectar.
She found the white carnations. They were delicate, their petals were like soft silk.
Mafuyu’s hand drifted toward a bucket of blue roses.
“Do you want them?” Kanade asked.
Mafuyu looked at the roses, then at Kanade. “I don’t know…”
“I’ll get one for you.” Kanade smiled.
As they waited at the counter, a high-pitched, familiar laugh echoed from the sidewalk outside the shop window.
“Wait, Ena! Look at this one! It’s totally suits you!”
Kanade and Mafuyu turned. Through the glass, they saw Mizuki and Ena.
Mizuki was pointing excitedly at a display of miniature pumpkins and fall decor, while Ena looked half-annoyed and half-amused.
Mizuki spotted them through the window. Her eyes went wide, and she immediately dragged a protesting Ena into the shop.
“No way! Kanade? And Mafuyu?” Mizuki beamed, her pink hair practically glowing in the shop’s lighting. “Are you guys on a date? Buying flowers? That’s so cute!”
“We’re just... buying flowers,” Kanade said, her face heating up.
Ena crossed her arms, her eyes darting between Kanade’s white carnations and Mafuyu’s purple sweet peas. “It’s rare to see you outside Kanade. Are you feeling okay?”
“I’m okay,” Kanade said.
Be honest. Don’t run away this time.
She took a breath, steadying her voice. “Actually… theres something I want to say… Not now, but tonight at 25:00.”
Ena and Mizuki traded a surprised look, but then Mizuki smiled softly. “Whenever you’re ready Kanade. We’re not going anywhere”
“Yeah,” Ena added, looking away to hide her concern. “I’m glad you want to tell us Kanade, whatever it is.
“Thank you,” Kanade said.
She left a weight lift off her shoulders.
That evening, the house was bathed in the orange glow of the setting sun. The kitchen was filled with the clatter of plates as Honami helped prepare dinner. Mafuyu had stayed to help Honami too.
After dinner, Kanade’s father walked over to the corner of the living room where the digital keyboard sat. He ran his fingers over the plastic keys.
“Kanade,” he said with a small smile.
Kanade, who was sitting on the couch, looked over to her father.
He sat on the piano bench and looked back at her. “Would you play with me? Just a simple duet.”
Kanade felt a rush of nerves.
Was he sure? She hadn’t played in so long…
But her father was asking her, so perhaps, just this time, Kanade would indulge in the moment.
“Okay,” she said.
She sat beside him. The bench was a bit narrow, their shoulders touching.
Her father started with a simple C-major scale. Kanade joined in, playing a low, steady rhythm.
They were playing just for fun… it certainly wasn’t a masterpiece, nor would it save anyone. They were just playing a simple melody. And Kanade felt like she’s finally learned how to breathe after spending such a long time underwater.
The sound filled the room, bouncing off the walls of the house.
Kanade closed her eyes. She focused on the sensation of the keys. She felt the way they resisted her touch and then clicked into place. She felt the sound of her father’s breathing beside her.
As the final chord faded into the quiet evening, Kanade simply rested her hands on the keys and listened.
“That was a good song, Kanade,” her father said.
“Yeah,” Kanade replied, a genuine, warm smile finally reaching her eyes. “It was.”
The clock on Kanade’s monitor showed the time was 25:00
The familiar, low-pitched chime of the Nightcord entrance echoed in the quiet room. On the desk, the small succulent sat in the glow of the screen, its thick leaves casting a shadow over the paper where Kanade had been sketching.
Kanade sat in her chair, beside her, sitting on the edge of the bed, was Mafuyu.
The voice icons lit up on the screen.
"Hiiii~! Is everyone here? I’m totally wiped. Enanan was being so picky with the lighting for the new MV sketches." Mizuki’s cheery voice shone through the speakers.
“I was just trying to make sure it didn't look washed out... Kanade? You’re muted."
Kanade looked at the 'Unmute' icon. Her heart felt like a bird trapped in a cage, fluttering violently.
She felt a hand on her shoulder.
Mafuyu moved closer. Her grip was firm, it wasn’t tight enough to hurt, but enough to let Kanade know she wasn’t drifting away. Mafuyu didn't say anything, but her touch said everything, that she was here for Kanade.
Kanade unmuted her mic.
"I’m not working on the track right now," Kanade said. Her voice was thin, but steady. "Actually... The thing I wanted to say. It’s about the day I got discharged after collapsing.”
The chat went silent. Mizuki’s joking tone vanished. Ena’s sharp jeers died.
"I didn’t tell you guys anything," Kanade whispered. "I went to the pond in the park, the one near the carnations.”
She stopped, taking a shaky breath. Mafuyu leaned her head against Kanade’s shoulder.
"I almost walked into the water. I thought... I thought that if I couldn't save Mafuyu, then there was no point to me. I thought my music was a curse, and if I disappeared, the curse would go with me."
“So that’s why I’ve been odd recently.” Kanade confessed. “But I’m getting better now. Because of you guys. Thank you.”
The silence on the other end was absolute.
Mizuki was the first to speak, her voice trembling and stripped of all its usual playfulness.
"Kanade... the water? You mean... you were going to...?"
"Yes," Kanade said.
Kanade expected Ena to blow up. She expected a lecture, a scream, or a frantic "You idiot!" Instead, there was a long, shaky exhale from Ena’s side of the call.
"Why didn't you say anything?" Ena whispered. She sounded hollow, like the air had been kicked out of her lungs. "We were right there, Kanade. We were talking to you every night. How could you feel that alone while we were right here?"
"I didn't think I was allowed to be a burden," Kanade replied, tears finally spilling over. "I thought I had to be the one saving everyone else."
"Kanade..." Ena’s voice broke.
"She's not that person anymore," Mafuyu said into the mic calmly. "I'm here in her room. She's... she's trying to stay. She even bought a plant for herself.”
Mizuki let out a choked, wet laugh. "A plant? Really? What kind?"
"A succulent," Kanade said, wiping her eyes with her sleeve. "It’s sturdy. I like it.”
"That's... that's good," Mizuki whispered. "Thank you for telling us, Kanade. Truly. I know how hard it is to say the things that hurt. But please... if the water ever starts looking like an option again, call us. We’ll talk about bad art, or the weather... Or I can kidnap you and force you to come shopping with me again.”
Ena sniffled. "Next time we meet... I'm bringing my sketchbook. And I'm going to draw you and that plant. And if you even think about disappearing, I'll make sure the drawing is so ugly you'll have to stay just to complain about it."
Kanade smiled. "I'd like that, Ena."
A few hours later, everyone was done for the day and decided to go to sleep.
As the icons on the screen flickered off one by one, Mafuyu remained on the edge of the bed for a moment, her gaze fixed on the glowing "Meeting Ended" notification.
She looked at Kanade, then reached out and tucked a stray strand of silver hair behind Kanade’s ear.
"You did it," Mafuyu said softly.
"I did," Kanade whispered. She felt exhausted, but it was a good exhaustion, the kind you feel after a long walk in the sun.
Kanade stood up and walked to the window. She pulled the curtains back all the way.
The moon was high, casting a silver glow over the quiet street below. On her desk, the small succulent seemed to drink in the dim light.
"Mafuyu," Kanade called out softly. "Let’s sleep."
Mafuyu nodded. "Okay."
The sun rose over the city, but it didn't find Kanade huddled over a keyboard.
When Kanade woke up, the room was bright. She heard the faint sound of piano, perhaps that was her dad playing.
She took a a deep, full breath that reached all the way down to her core.
She wasn't a savior. She wasn't a ghost.
She was Yoisaki Kanade. And for today, that was more than enough.
The melody of the piano continued, rising and falling with the morning breeze. And as Kanade closed her eyes and hummed along, she finally understood.
Just breathing was a melody of its own.