Chapter Text
There was a loud knocking on her bedroom door and Sutton staggered over to it, still rubbing sleep out of her eyes as she blearily opened the door and stared up at the person waiting.
“I hate this routine, you know,” she said. Her voice was still thick and unused sounding at this hour. “I don’t remember asking to join in on this in the first place.”
Steve smiled good naturedly and stepped away from the door so she could join him. He was much too awake looking for this early in the morning. As always. Sutton could only just see the sun peeking out from between the various skyscrapers.
“Come on sleepy-head,” he said. “You’ve been doing it this long already.”
Sutton was already in her work out pants and shirt, so she huffed as she joined him in the hall. Together they made their way for the elevators which would take them out into the city and cold morning air.
“When do you go back to DC again,” she asked teasingly. “Maybe I’ll actually get some sleep then.”
Steve laughed easily, shaking out his limbs and stretching as they made it outside to the sidewalk. Sutton mimicked his movements, as she always did.
“Aw, you can’t say it’s all bad,” he said.
Pretending to think for a moment, Sutton balanced on one foot as she stretched a hamstring.
“True.” She relented with a quirk of her lips. “There’s coffee at the end.”
They set off at a jog, Steve going slow enough to keep pace beside her, as they made their way down perpetually bustling New York City streets. By this point she was already used to the slight hum as the reactor registered and adjusted to her increased activity.
As much as she didn’t enjoy mornings, she had to admit she’d come quite a ways since Steve had started dragging her out to jog. Breathing was a little easier and she was actually gaining some weight in lean muscle rather than just fat as she worked on eating more. The doctor was at least pleased with her progress, and she still hadn’t keeled over, so Sutton considered it all a success.
When they’d finally jogged down to the nearby park, Sutton waved in farewell as Steve shot off at a clip that she could never hope to keep up with even at her healthiest. She made sure to maintain her own pace as she jogged through the park, going for awhile until the reactor beeped at her to let her know she should start lowering her heart rate back down. Sutton did one more lap to cool down, stretched like Steve had shown her, and then made her way to the coffee shop just outside the park and got herself a latte. Sitting in a chair facing the window, she sipped at the hot drink and let her mind wander until she could see Steve’s tall form heading her way.
She ordered him a black coffee and met him as he reached the door, then they started the walk back to the Tower.
This was Sutton’s favorite part because the agony of running was over and she got to chat with Steve and drink coffee at the same time.
She continued to finish off the last of her coffee and fully wake up as she waited for Steve to ask the day’s question; it was his turn. Sutton had already forgotten exactly how the ritual had started, but it was a fun game and it hadn’t dipped into any uncomfortable territory thanks to the rule that you could ask anything you wanted, you just had to be prepared to answer the same question in return. Steve hummed and took another drink of his coffee.
“Ok,” he finally said. “How about a favorite childhood memory?”
Sutton took a moment to mull it over before a smile crept up her face.
“Alright, first one that comes to mind. Before my mom married Howard, we really struggled with money and stuff. She would try to do something special on my birthday, at least, but the year I turned ten had been especially rough. On my birthday she told me that we couldn’t do much, so Grandpa was going to take us fishing. And at ten, I can tell you, that did not sound like a fun idea to me. I begged her to do anything else, but nope. She insisted. So, we drove all the way out to get my grandparents and then we hit the road. I remember thinking it was a little strange that we didn’t have any fishing poles or anything, but I was too distracted to really think about it.
And then, after what felt like forever of driving, we pulled into this big parking lot, and we weren’t fishing at all. My mom had pinched and saved and gotten enough help from my grandparents to take me to Wild Waves, uh, an amusement park.”
Sutton smiled fondly and Steve mimicked the expression.
“I was so excited, I cried.” She laughed. She shrugged then, tossing her empty coffee cup in a nearby trash can. “I don’t know. I just remember I felt so special that birthday.”
Steve threw his cup away in the same trash can; he hadn’t ever been much for milking out his drink, from what she’d seen. He usually just downed the caffeine and waited for it do it’s job. She sometimes wondered if that was leftover from his time in the army.
“It sounds like she really loves you.”
“Yeah.” She hummed.
“Buck dragged me to Coney Island once.”
Sutton tilted her head as she listened. He hadn't spoken much about Bucky around her. She wasn’t sure if he talked about Bucky to anyone, really. The conversation felt more vulnerable now that he'd brought up his friend.
“He was always trying to keep me out of trouble. I didn't make it easy for him.” Steve laughed lightly and Sutton smiled. “But he never coddled me either. He dared me to go on the roller coaster that day, so of course I had to ride it.”
“Obviously,” Sutton agreed.
“I had a few bruises by the time it was over,” Steve continued. “But I didn’t care.”
The Tower was in sight now. Sutton shoved her hands into the pocket of her hoodie and nudged Steve with her shoulder.
“He loved you too.”
Steve flashed her a soft smile and opened the front door of the Tower for her, as he usually did. Sutton thanked him and they strode for the elevator together. It was a companionable silence, one Sutton hadn’t ever imagined herself developing with a guy like Steve. But it seemed after the first few times of being literally breathless after jogging with him, silences were unavoidable. And really, he didn’t ever make her feel like she had to talk. There was a certain peace he was able to radiate to others, even if Sutton wasn’t exactly convinced he felt it himself all the time.
They both kept themselves occupied with their own thoughts until finally splitting off to their different floors. Sutton waved as Steve exited the elevator. She flashed him a soft smile then leaned back into the elevator railing as the doors closed and hummed in contentment.
Back in her own room, Sutton peeled off her dirty workout clothes and hurried to shower. Today was going to be a good day. Today she was finally going back to work.
[][]
Maggie and Avery were ecstatic to see her back at Stark Industries. They greeted her with warm smiles and demanded that she allow them to take her to lunch, and she agreed happily for the first time. Sutton stuck to the story that she’d been in an accident and had been in a private hospital her entire absence. Perhaps she might’ve been able to pass it off as an unplanned vacation, but the arc reactor that was now a part of her could only be hidden for so long. The light shone through some of her shirts, and people were bound to notice whether she wanted them to or not.
The fact that she had a device entirely too similar to Tony’s own reactor was a bit brow raising, but Sutton would only smile and say that Tony was a generous philanthropist when asked about it.
For now, though, she continued to wear shirts with collars above the collarbone and made of thicker materials. Thanks to it being winter, it wouldn’t seem at all unusual.
She had to disappoint Maggie and Avery with little to no details about her injury and time recuperating. Being gone for several months, around half a year even, was not easily explained away. But telling people that you had been in a coma for most of the incident really helped cut down on the amount of story you had to make up. The women showed their true, amazing colors with how they took the story in stride and didn’t actually press for more information than Sutton was willing, or able, to share. It seemed like a drastic change from how she’d remembered them. For the first time, Sutton let herself acknowledge that these women could truly be good friends. That perhaps she might be able to befriend them, enjoy their company, and not feel guilty for it.
If she was going to be living here, after all, no use in being miserable; right? Isn’t that what her family would really want? And after all her near death experiences, Sutton thought the present was a much better place to live in.
[][][][][]
Moving back out of the Tower and into her own apartment was a process. Tony had put her old place on a sort of hold and everything was where she had last left it.
A plus of owning the building, probably.
When the time came, it’d be a simple transition, but she just hadn’t quite worked up to staying on her own again. At first, given her physical state, Tony had outright told her she needed to stay within easy reach, especially given the continuous modifications her reactor needed to function properly. But now that she’d started working again, could run without her heart going out, and with the nightmares slowing slightly, she knew the time was close. But she figured that while Steve and Natasha were still in the area, she could stick around. Natasha was actually unintimidating when you got to know her, with a sly sense of humor and larger knowledge of useless trivia than Sutton would’ve guessed.
The assassin liked to include emoticons in her texts and slip movie quotes into conversations.
Sutton was sitting in one of the common rooms with the redhead now. It was knitting time, and Sutton was just about done with her scarf as Natasha worked on what looked to be a beanie with arrow motifs incorporated in it. The way she was able to deftly switch between colors of yarn baffled Sutton, as she was still mastering just basic knitting with one strand of yarn at a time herself.
“So who do you think the killer is,” Natasha asked. Her fingers moved without thought, the muscle memory doing the work for her as she slipped needles through loops. Sutton hummed in contemplation as she measured her scarf around her neck again to see how much more she’d have to do.
“I’m not sure,” she said. “At first I thought it was the boyfriend, but then he ended up having that alibi. I guess that would have been too obvious anyway.”
“My money's on the deputy.”
“What!” Sutton gasped. “But they’re so nice!”
Natasha smirked, glancing up through her brows.
“I know.”
Sutton frowned and turned the idea over in her head a moment before sighing and going back to knitting. The scarf still needed a few more inches.
“I guess that would make a big plot twist. And they do have the inside scoop to help them get away with it.”
“Exactly.”
Sutton replayed what scenes she could remember with the deputy as she knit and tried to recall if there had been any odd or suspicious looks on the character’s face that might have hinted at ulterior motives.
A few rows of stitching later and Sutton fidgeted on the couch, pulling her legs up in order to tuck them under herself.
“Sort of related, I was thinking of taking a karate class,” she said in a casual tone. Natasha looked up from her beanie. “After all,” Sutton continued, “New York isn’t exactly the safest place and I’ve already been running with Steve, so what’s a bit more exercise, right?”
“Karate,” Natasha said flatly. Sutton glanced up from her knitting, unsure of where the confusion was coming from.
“Yeah. Karate. You know, self defense. I just thought it might be a good idea.”
“Basic karate is only ok if you have the element of surprise and the other person doesn’t have much of an idea of what they’re doing, Daniel-son. And given your size, odds aren’t in your favor with that. If you want to really learn how to fight all you have to do is ask.”
Sutton paused in her knitting. Natasha was still looking at her, and she looked serious about the offer. She swallowed a bit nervously.
“Oh, I swear I wasn’t fishing for an offer. I didn’t mean that you had to-”
Natasha cracked a smile.
“I know. But you have a point. You should know the basics of defending yourself. Especially given your closeness with the team and the potential of your abilities. And who better than to give you a few pointers than me, right?”
She shot Sutton a wicked smile at that and all Sutton could imagine was getting flipped off the ground and smashed into a gym mat on a repeating loop. Swallowing again, Sutton shot the infamous spy a thin smile.
“I guess just until you leave,” she said. “And I suppose you are the best.”
“Mm-hmm,” Natasha agreed. “Now finish the last few rows on that and I'll show you how to bind it off.”
[][][][][]
Pepper invited her to dinner to celebrate her first day back at work. It wasn't anything fancy, it wasn't even out of the Tower. But it had been a few days since Sutton had seen her or Tony, and the woman must have known the intimate setting would be more appreciated.
Sutton made sure she at least was cleaned up and presentable, actually wearing a dress, just to show that she took the invite seriously.
She showed up at the specified time, thanks in part to directions from Jarvis, as the dinner was being held in a more private dining room. It was located on yet another floor from the lab and guest rooms. The private elevator opened to a wide open area that looked like it might actually be a penthouse space. She had a sneaking suspicion that this was Tony and Pepper’s home. It was incredibly sleek and modern with a beautiful view of the twinkling city around them. From this height and at this time of night, the city actually looked magical. For a moment she just took in the view, pretending the city was like a safe, sparkling snow globe. Even now, it was often a jarring experience for her. While her hometown might not have been exactly tiny, it was fairly spread out, and she’d never fully immersed herself in city life.
Sutton smoothed down her dress and tucked a curl behind her ear before tapping on the wall and entering the room fully. Around the wall was the dining room, set with warm lighting and a table of familiar faces.
“Oh.”
It was not just Tony and Pepper. Natasha and Steve were both sitting at the table as well, and to her surprise, Bruce and Clint and Thor were even there.
“What?”
“Surprise!”
Sutton raised a brow in confusion and shot a questioning glance at Steve and Natasha. Steve smiled and shrugged, his expression mischievous and humored. Natasha waved her in.
“Everyone was in town, it turns out. We figured this would make a nice team dinner.”
“Convenient, right,” droned Clint. He was sitting with his face resting on his fist and trying to balance his silverware on their ends.
“Sure,” Sutton agreed.
Standing in the entryway of the dining room for any longer would get weird, so she finally joined them and pulled out the empty chair next to Clint and sat down.
“Funny,” she said as she shot Steve a look, “that you never mentioned anything this morning about dinner.”
“It never came up. And it wasn’t your turn to ask.”
Sutton shot Steve a mock glare as he only grinned smugly. Clint turned to look at her.
“Wait; are you two hanging out now?”
“Or you,” Sutton continued as she looked to Natasha.
Natasha was just as apologetic as Steve.
“I guess I just got too distracted thinking up a new self defense regimen for you.”
Sutton snapped her mouth shut at that and Clint guffawed.
“Oh man. What’d you get yourself into, kid?”
Tony rolled his eyes a bit and gestured to the food already setting out on the table.
“The chit-chat can wait until after we start eating. I’m starved.”
The table was full of food, true, but it wasn’t anything like ritzy five-star restaurant fare. Sutton laughed as she noted the Brooklyn pizza boxes, bowls of salad, and cans of soda spread out before them.
“Seriously, Tony?” She laughed.
“What? If you don’t like pizza, you can just leave.”
Sutton just shook her head and reached to peek into the nearest box. It looked like a meat-lovers, so she helped herself to a slice.
“No complaints here,” she said. “Feels like home, actually.”
[]
When it had grown late and Sutton had laughed and talked and engaged with people and her limit for the day was met, she excused herself from the table. She was trying not to yawn openly and, really, after having woken up so early was surprised she’d lasted this long. She wished all the Avengers goodnight and let Steve walk her to the elevator while she savored the warm contented feeling that she hadn’t felt in probably almost two years.
And she wasn’t going to complain if a handsome guy wanted to escort her to the elevator. She wasn’t that cruel.
He wished her goodnight as she settled against the elevator railing and she waved back shyly as the doors closed, blocking his figure from view.
As she glanced at the time on her phone, she could only wonder if he’d been serious when he’d said that he still planned on running tomorrow.
She’d better just collapse on her bed and pray for sleep to instantly take her.
[][][][][]
Sutton trembled as she walked through wreckage and ruin. Fire blazed in the distance, rebar jutted up on either side of her like exposed bones, and she swore she heard the echoes of screams on the air.
“Hello? I know this is a dream,” she yelled. “I remember everything! Loki!”
But there was no sign of the fallen Asgardian prince as she trudged along. She didn’t usually see actual places when he visited her. It was always just a well of darkness. When there actually was a setting, she never realized she was dreaming until she woke. This change had her nerves buzzing and an unease twisting in her stomach.
Sutton climbed over a chunk of concrete the size of a car, her shoes slipping on loosened chunks, only to hear a wet cough, a gurgle, and then silence from the ground below. The world dimmed, the sky darkening and opening up until the sun was outshone by stars farther away; her vision funneled down at the sight before her.
There was a clearing in the rubble, as if debris hadn’t had a chance to fall there. And in that clearing was a pile of bodies.
Her entire body spasmed, and Sutton couldn’t even audibly scream. For a moment she was frozen in fear and horror before her limbs jerked and moved again and she was flying down the concrete boulder and down onto her knees.
“Natasha! Steve? What-”
They were still. Eyes glassy and unseeing as they angled towards the sky and Sutton choked back hysteria as she looked around. They were there. All of them. And there was so much blood. The ground and the concrete was soaked in it.
“Tony? No. No, no, no, no, no.”
Tony was still in his suit, mask ripped off and the arc reactor in his chest dark and dead. Sutton crawled over to his body, sobbing as she found herself in the middle of the entire team of Avengers. Her hand was violently shaking as she raised it and tried to press two fingers to his neck. The skin was ice cold.
“Somebody help me!”
But there was no one else. The city, the world, was dead and empty. She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t see passed the tears that poured from her eyes. There was a rumbling as she continued to cry for help that wouldn’t come. A sound like the grating of stone against stone screeched through the atmosphere and the sky tore open again. Sutton gasped and looked up. And then she saw him.
“There you are.”
He was peering down at her from the sky, smiling a dull, wide toothed smile that cracked the skin on his face. Purple. Sutton felt terror anew. He had done this.
Thanos.
Sutton huddled down, cradling Tony’s limp head in her lap as she stretched to try and shield Natasha and Steve’s bodies with her arm. His hand reached down, reached down to pluck her up and tear her away from the people she’d come to love, and there was nothing she could do to stop it.
She screamed, long and loud, and the dream flickered dangerously.
Fat fingers were almost brushing over her when someone else pulled her away from behind. Long fingers dug into her arms and easily lifted her out of the rubble. Tony’s head fell from her lap and hit the pavement and she choked on another sob. But whoever had pulled her away had saved her momentarily from Thanos’ grasp. She leaned back into the body, shaking and hiccuping madly. The fingers turned gentle as they left her arms and rested on her shoulders.
“You can stop this.”
“Loki.” She let out a shaky breath.
Thanos was snarling at her disappearance, his eyes roving the broken earth to find her. Loki kept her in place. Compared to the touch of Tony, he felt warm.
“I cannot protect you from him,” he said into her ear. “The longer you hesitate, the closer this day comes.”
“No,” she said.
“Then, your Avengers will die.”
[][]
“They’re dead, ” was the first thought that she could consciously process when she woke. She was drenched in sweat and already halfway out of her room when she realized that she was moving. Her face was still wet and her nose was clogged and her chest was collapsing as the reactor beeped shrilly. She made it to the elevator and slammed her fist into the button for the lab floor.
[Miss Regan, your bio readings indicate you may be having a panic attack. Please-]
She didn’t hear the rest. The doors to the elevator dinged open and she was running through them with wild eyes as she searched for someone. Anyone. The immediate hall was empty and quiet and she could feel the panic rise up in her throat.
“Hello!”
Her voice sounded raw and it cracked as she screamed the word. No one answered instantly and fear only gripped her tighter. The clear glass walls of the lab opened up to the dark space inside and Sutton pounded a hand against the surface.
“Where are you!”
But it stayed dark and quiet. No one was answering her and she felt the silence swallow her up. She was leaned up against the glass, sobbing and unable to push herself away and hardly able to keep herself on her feet. Her vision dimmed a few times before she heard quiet footsteps on the tile floor.
“Sutton?”
She spun around only to come face-to-face with Steve. Sutton took two steps with shaking knees before he was close enough for her to throw herself into his arms. His skin was warm, but she still pressed two fingers into his neck.
He was breathing. He was holding her up and he was breathing.
“Sutton, just breathe, ok? Everything is fine. You’re safe.”
“Where’s the rest,” she asked instead. “Where is everyone?”
There was a chime from down the hall, and when the elevator doors opened Tony came barrelling out. He was barefoot, and looked like he’d thrown on the first articles of clothing he could find with his hair plastered to the side of his head.
“What’s going on? What is it? Jarvis said-”
“Tony!”
Her entire body went limp in Steve’s arms and he tensed to keep her held upright. With Tony and Steve next to her, Sutton breathed a little easier. Her body still shook with adrenaline and fear, but she could formulate sentences easier.
“Where is everyone else,” she asked again. “I have to make sure- I need to see-”
“Nothing happened, Sutton,” Tony tried to calm her. She could see his gaze scanning over her, taking in her state, as he lifted his hands in reassurance. “It was just a bad nightmare, kid.”
Steve was still holding her, and while this would normally send her into a nervous fit, she hardly noticed now.
“He killed you.” She breathed. “He killed all of you.”
“Who,” asked Steve. He gently lowered her down and waited until he was sure her legs were steady under her before stepping back so he could more easily see her face. Sutton fought through the fear of saying his name aloud, telling herself that he wouldn’t hear her. He wasn’t omnipresent.
“Thanos,” she finally managed to utter. Her eyes grew hot again as new tears threatened
to form and fall. “He killed all of you and then came for me. He was looking for me.”
A shudder wracked her frame as she recalled the monster’s face and angry eyes.
“It was just a dream,” Tony repeated. Sutton glared at him through her tears.
“No it wasn’t! He’s coming. He knows about me; the universal walls are thin. He can sense it!”
“How do you know?” Steve and Tony shared a wary look. Sutton started to answer, but faltered.
“I-I just do. Something- there was… a warning?”
“A warning from who?”
She looked up at Steve and crinkled her brow in confusion.
“I can’t remember. But they- I think they said he’s coming and-”
Her ramble cut off mid stride and Sutton’s thoughts pulled inward. Who had warned her? And why did she feel like she remembered everything but that crucial detail? It couldn’t be the Doctor. He didn’t know about Thanos, and he wouldn’t be so reckless as to try and break through already thin walls.
So who?
She could feel it in her gut. This had not just been a dream. Her dreams had always been filled with space and stars and falling Starships. Reminders of her guilt that she still hadn’t completely shaken off. This one had been different.
It had to be someone who spoke only in her dreams. Who could place themselves in her own mind. Someone who knew of Thanos and feared him enough to want her to use her ability to end the mad titan.
“Dreams,” she muttered. “Dreams and Thanos.” There was only one person who came to mind that fit the bill. But that was impossible, wasn’t it? He was dead. “Loki?”
“What,” Tony snapped. Steve’s brow furrowed.
“He used to invade my dreams before I came here. He’s the only one I can think of that would know of Thanos and fear him enough to-to-” Her eyes widened and one hand rose up to rest on her throat. “Enough to make sure I ended up in this universe. With my imagination.”
Steve placed one hand on his hip and ran through the other through his hair while he let out a breath.
“But he died, didn’t he? That’s what Doctor Foster and Thor said.”
“It’s at least what people believe,” said Tony.
Sutton couldn’t ruminate on the idea that Loki may still be alive and all the unease that filled her with. He was a small fish compared to what she’d just witnessed.
“Whether he’s alive or not isn’t important right now. I can’t let that monster hurt you guys. And I won’t be used; not again.”
“That’s not going to happen,” Tony said sharply.
It felt like all the adrenaline left her body at once. Sutton swayed on legs that felt like modeling clay and just barely kept herself upright on her feet. For whatever reason, it was the concerned looks from the men before her that brought her fully into the present. She realized that she was just in her pajamas, a cami and some sweats, and that her reactor was blatantly out for all to see; glowing softly blue and illuminating the puckered skin around its edges. Sutton pulled her hair over her shoulder and let it rest over the reactor.
“Everyone’s fine,” she said. “No one is dead.”
And maybe she was trying to reassure herself a little, but she could still see their blank faces as vividly as the men before her. There was still the echoes of that horrified emptiness, as if everything had been ripped out through her stomach and she’d been left hollow. She never wanted to feel that kind of horror again.
She wouldn’t.
“Nobody is hurt,” Steve reassured. “How about you sit down for a second, though?”
His hand hovered near her shoulder without touching and she followed his directing as they made their way into the kitchen and she sat down on one of the bar stools. A glass of water was placed in front of her and Sutton mumbled a quiet
‘thank you’
to a still unsettled looking Tony.
After taking a drink of the cool water she let it settle before sighing and looking up at Tony and Steve from under her brows.
“Sorry to wake you guys up. I don’t- I don’t know what happened. I shouldn’t have freaked out like that.”
“I was already up,” said Steve. “And it’s not your fault you had a nightmare. Or whatever,” he amended when she shot him a look.
“If Thor hadn’t already left, we could have asked him about it.” Tony rubbed tiredly at his face as he leaned against the counter. “Maybe we could find a way to send a message to that Heimdall guy he’s so proud of.”
Sutton sat her glass of water down and looked up at the ceiling, the way she did when addressing Jarvis.
“Oh mighty Heimdall,” she said flatly. “Loki may or may not be alive. I think Thanos the Mad Titan might be after me and going to kill all my friends. Please relay to Thor ASAP. Thanks.”
Tony was unamused.
“I guess we have a new genius in the Tower,” he sniped.
Steve seemed to be confused by something. His brows were lowered as his lips ticked downward.
“Why'd you call him the Mad Titan,” he finally asked. “I don't remember you using that title for him back in your dimension.”
Sutton mirrored his frown as she thought. She honestly didn't remember what the alien’s other monikers were. She'd done enough research after seeing the movie to find out the villain’s name and basic powers, but hadn't cared to discover much else. Perhaps she'd read it on Wikipedia and it had subconsciously stuck with her.
“I don't know,” she admitted. “I must have read it somewhere.”
“Or someone told you,” he said.
Sutton groaned and took another drink of water. A headache was threatening to creep up around the back of her skull, and she wondered briefly if caffeine would help.
“You guys can go back to bed. I'm ok now.”
She flashed a thin smile at them, lifting her glass of water as if it were some kind of proof of her wellbeing.
“It’s five thirty.” Steve pointed out.
Tony still looked tired, but Sutton wasn’t sure if it was the exhausted kind of tired or the perpetual kind. He rubbed at his face again, but shook his head ‘no’ and she didn’t feel like arguing. Instead she got up and dumped what was left of the water down the sink and put the glass in the dishwasher.
“Are you still running,” she asked. Steve shifted.
“You should probably rest.”
Tony huffed in what was probably frustration. She felt like she did that to people a lot.
“Did you not hear your reactor a few minutes ago? I think you put your heart through enough stress for one morning.”
She felt drained and wired all at once, but she wasn’t about to admit that openly. After reassuring the two, several times, that she was fine she was finally able to escape back up to her own room. For a moment, she just breathed. Sutton ran a hand through her tangled, knotted hair and clenched her eyes shut as she leaned her head back on the door.
Of course she’d go and lose it in front of them. Again.
She really needed to move back into her own place.
[][]
Later in the afternoon she found herself wandering the lab floor alone. She’d forced herself to eat something as a late breakfast and early lunch, the day was turning out to be a bit rocky and she would slip backwards if she let herself. The vision of the Avengers mangled and dead still haunted her vision if she closed her eyes for too long.
Sutton slipped into the lab. It was silent inside for once. No one was tinkering with cutting edge mechanics or designing technology that shouldn’t be able to exist. She wasn’t sure where everyone had run off too, but she was glad for the moment alone.
Coming back was supposed to have been easy. A relief.
So why was it not completely feeling that way?
The machine still sat in the corner of the lab. It was large and blocky, its screens all turned off and motors silent. She couldn’t believe that this was the thing that had pulled her back.
Sutton ran her fingers over one of the screens as she gazed over it. Three scientists had made this in less than a year. A machine that could rip through dimensions, find a particular person, and drag them back through the holes it’d made.
It must have cost Tony millions and millions. Could you even put a price on something like this? This incredible? If NASA ever found out about it, they’d have fits.
Sutton wondered if it had been worth it if she were just going to be the cause of more pain. This world was dangerous on its own, true, but she certainly didn’t feel like she was helping.
“I wouldn’t send you back, even if I could.”
Sutton turned around, her fingers falling from the screen as she acknowledged Tony. She hadn’t even heard him come in. Usually the doors hissed louder than that.
“I know,” she said. “Still, there are worse things than prison.”
He snorted in disagreement, at least she assumed, and joined her in staring at the machine. Tony leaned back on one leg and shoved his hands in his pockets. Both of their reactors glowed blue.
“Pretty sure this thing did a number on astronomy readings. I actually got a warning letter from SHIELD.”
Sutton stared up at him in disbelief.
“Yikes.”
“ Pssh. They don’t scare me. And I’d like to see them try to come take this. I doubt they could even fit it in the elevator.”
“Knowing SHIELD, they’d at least give it a good try.”
Tony smiled in silence and they continued to eye the machine while mulling over their own thoughts.
“I do have to dismantle it though,” Tony finally said quietly. “It’s too dangerous to keep.”
A lump rose in Sutton’s throat. She swallowed it back down and cleared her throat as she blinked.
“I kind of figured.”
“But,” Tony hedged. Sutton’s gaze snapped up to him in curiosity as he fidgeted. “Recent readings have shown that dimensional walls have appeared to stabilize some. Not exactly repair, but it’s something. If it’s non-living, and small enough, I might be able to send one more thing through before I terminate this thing.”
Something fluttered in her stomach as the words sank in.
“Do you mean it? It’d be safe?”
Tony shrugged.
“Safe as poking through dimensions can be. But, really, it has to be small. Probably smaller than a loaf of bread with-”
“What about- what about a CD?”
Tony paused and tilted his head to the side.
“A CD?”
Sutton rubbed a hand over her face as her skin began to tingle at just the thought.
“Do you have a video camera in the Tower?”
[][]
Tyrese woke up in the early afternoon. He’d been up studying for exams late into the night and had eventually fallen face first onto his bed, though he couldn’t remember exactly when. He rubbed at his crusty eyes as he sat up in bed and yawned loudly. He groaned when he saw the time and knew he’d have to endure another lecture on staying up and sleeping in that he really didn’t want to have to hear.
He dropped his legs to the carpeted floor and shuffled to the door of his bedroom, set on taking a pit stop to the bathroom before venturing downstairs. Something sharp poked into his foot as he passed by the wall in front of his bed.
“Ow!”
Tyrese’s gaze snapped to the floor with a glare. There shouldn’t be anything on the floor. Especially not something with sharp corners like this had.
Oddly enough there was a clear, plastic disc case on his floor that most certainly hadn’t been there the day before. He hesitated a moment before picking it up, twisting the case so that the thick, black ink on the CD was legible.
Watch alone, it said. And then, in parenthesis, as family.
Tyrese frowned at the cryptic message before marching to the stair bannister, questions rising in this throat.
“Mom?”
[]
The three of them gathered in the living room with a bit of confusion. No one had seen the disc before or knew where it’d come from. But they’d decided that they should follow the instructions and find out what it was together.
“Could be a prank from one of your friends,” his mom commented reasonably. “I just hope it’s nothing weird.”
Tyrese didn’t think so, but said nothing as he pushed play on the DVD player.
For a moment nothing happened and the screen remained blank, and then the picture popped on screen and his mother cried aloud.
“Is it recording? Ok. Ok, cool.”
It was Sutton.
Nothing could have prepared him for seeing her face again so suddenly. He covered his mouth in shock, springing to his feet as he took her in. Sutton was sitting in what looked to be some sort of expensive living room and brushing her hair away from her face as she focused her gaze on the camera. She looked well, but tired. He could remember seeing her face look like that years ago when he was younger and she was still in college. Her mouth pulled up at the ends in what looked to be a nervous smile as she tentatively waved.
“Hi guys. Mom, H-Howard. Tyrese.”
Her voice was cracking slightly and she had to clear her throat and pause to blink.
The living room was deathly quiet as Lindsey desperately held in her cries to hear what was being said. Tyrese felt cold and he sat back down, scooting closer to his parents on the couch as they huddled together, eyes transfixed on the television.
“I’m so, so sorry for how I left you guys. Believe me, I never wanted to. And definitely not without ever getting a chance to really say goodbye. But I guess… this is as close to that as I’ll ever get.”
Tyrese was trying not to cry and failing as the video continued on. His father was holding his mother and she grabbed his hand as Sutton, their Sutton, Sutton who’d been lost for over two years now, spoke to them again.
And like her note had hinted at in the beginning, she told them a fantastical, unbelievable story.
“I know how crazy it sounds. I know. But it’s all insanely true. And I wish, I wish things could have gone differently. I’m sorry I didn’t call when it all happened. I should have. I wasn’t thinking. I didn’t want to drag you guys into it, but-but that’s no excuse. Sorry, Tyrese. I know you always wanted to meet Captain America. But I got your note, bud. I got it. Thank you. I love you so much.”
Tyrese felt himself break passed the point of hiding it. It was hard not to cry when both your parents were crying too.
“Howard. You’re the best. You’ve always been so great to my mom, and you were always so good to me. Thank you for coming in and joining our family. Your dinners were much better than mom’s.” They laughed as Sutton laughed, though the moment didn’t last for long.
“You were the best father figure I could have hoped for. And mom.” Sutton brushed her hair over her left shoulder, laying it down over her high necked top and smiling sadly.
“I miss you so much. It’s winter here and every time it looks like it’s about to snow I just remember how you always wanted to visit New York for Christmas. It’s busy here. You can always hear traffic. But the libraries are good. You’d like that.
Gosh, there’s just so much I wish I could show you guys. I wish I could actually see you.”
She glanced at something off screen and wiped at her own wet eyes.
“I guess that I just wanted you guys to know that I’m alive. I’m perfectly safe. And I will never, ever stop missing you guys, but- I’m getting better at being happy.”
With a deep breath she seemed to shake herself free from her tears and she gestured to someone out of view of the camera.
“Ok. I know you’re not just going to automatically believe my story. I wouldn’t believe me either. So here’s some proof. Come on, guys. Say hi.”
The screen was suddenly filled with people as a group came and surrounded Sutton on the couch she was perched on. Tyrese could name all of them.
Iron Man, with his arc reactor shining through his shirt.
Captain America, smiling awkwardly at the camera as he sat down.
Black Widow, shooting a glare at a whining Hawkeye who could be heard insisting about how the family would probably just assume they were the actors anyway.
Sutton reached down towards a coffee table in front of them and picked up a newspaper that had been laying on top of it. She flashed the date at them and winced slightly.
“I have no idea how these dimensions interact regarding timelines,” she said. “But this is the date here. I know you may still have doubts, but I mean- come on. This is the best I can do.”
Tyrese watched in awe as Iron Man held out a hand and there was a moment of nothing before his suit suddenly flashed out of from the edges of the screen and snapped onto his limbs.
“How about this,” he asked through his mask before he shot off out of the room.
He could see Sutton roll her eyes and laugh at Steve who seemed unamused with his bland statement of,
“Show-off.”
“Anyway, ” she continued. “ Last I noted I was wanted by the U.S. government before I
left. I can’t imagine that’s changed. And what are the odds of me hanging out with celebrities when I’m wanted for domestic terrorism? Probably higher than having alternate dimensions, actually. But- it is what it is.”
A beat passed. Tyrese wondered if his mom and dad felt just as wrecked inside as he did. Like someone had taken an egg beater to his internal organs and aspired to make pudding out of them. And then Sutton looked directly into the camera again, as if she could see through the lens, into their home, and into their own eyes. She smiled shakily at them and bit her lip briefly.
“I’m alive,” she said. “I’m… safe. You don’t have to worry about me anymore. I don’t know what you guys’ll do with this disc, but no one else can see this. I don’t want you to get in trouble.
I love you all so much. Just remember that. I miss you and I love you. Take care of yourselves.”
She waved at the camera. The people in the room turned their gazes towards her, Captain America put a hand on her shoulder, and then the screen went black.
His mother wailed as she started to sob again and his father was trying not to cry just as loudly. Tyrese shifted and buried his face in his mother’s back as he hugged her from behind.
It was a blessing and curse to finally know the truth. He felt relieved and empty and desperate and devastated.
They could finally rest knowing that Sutton was alive and well and not in harm’s way.
But she was never coming back.
[][][][][][]
Sutton gazed blankly into the distance beyond the video camera. She leaned against Steve’s side and let him rub her shoulder.
“Do you think it’s ok that I lied to them,” she asked. Her voice was raspy from all the talking she’d done and from all the effort it took to not cry the entire time she’d been in front of the camera.
“I think it was kinder,” Steve said after a moment of silence. “It’d only hurt them more to worry without ever knowing.”
Sutton nodded and sighed.
“Good. That’s what I thought.”
“We’re all going to work through this together. You’re not going to be left to go up against this guy alone.”
She smiled slightly at the mini pep talk.
“I know. And I really couldn’t ask for a better team.”