Chapter Text
Viktor’s heart is pounding harder than it ever has when he approaches the bedroom door.
The knob turns easier than he had anticipated, and the room opens to him. Sunlight casts bright figures onto the bedsheets, Yuuri’s body bundled under the layers. Mattress dipping, Viktor perches himself on the edge of the bed. Heat pinches at the palm of his hand, steaming peppermint tea sloshing around in the mug and threatening to spill.
He doesn’t say anything when he wakes him; a nudge is the only thing he can find in himself to extend. Yuuri wakes slowly, gunk in his eyes, hair sticking up where it was buried in pillows. Viktor tries to say something again, but he can’t find the words and resigns to handing Yuuri the mug as he sits up.
The silence will go on forever if he doesn’t end it now, so this time, he says something. “I’m sorry.”
Yuuri takes the tea away from his lips and places it in his lap. “No, I’m sorry for snapping at you. I just got frustrated when I didn’t know what was going on.”
It’s as if most of the time they spend together is in silence. Viktor begins again. “My dad was…really good to me at first. He signed me up for lessons, supported me, encouraged me…” His face tenses. “But at some point, encouragement turned into expectations, and I was forced to work harder than I physically could to keep everything together. Even as an adult, he never left my career alone.”
“Viktor…”
He smiles to himself for a second. “You made me forget all of it. But when I came back…” Viktor takes a breath. “I always felt like I belonged most with you, so when it started to get painful to be around you, to keep it from you, not wanting to make him a part of it…” he pauses, gaze falling to his hands fiddling with each other. “I just… lost it.”
After his eyes widen and realize what he’s been asking for, Yuuri takes a long, sharp breath in. “At first, I was mad that you didn’t tell me. But when I was drunk, getting hit by some guy in an alley, I realized that I probably would have done the same.” He looks up from his lap and smiles. “Because neither of us are good at that sort of thing.”
Viktor’s head pops up, every line on his skin creasing in appreciation and relief. “Thank you.” The sentence comes out quiet as tears pool in the bottoms of his eyelids. Yuuri grins back at him, brushing the water away from Viktor’s eyes before they start to fall.
“Then, to show your gratitude, promise me.”
Viktor’s jaw loosens and lets his mouth open a little.
“Promise me you’ll forget everything. Forget it all, and think only of me, because…” Yuuri inhales, barely holding back his own tears. “I will love you no matter what.”
When his words reach Viktor, goosebumps rise from underneath his skin and a shivering crawls its way through his back. Viktor can feel his tears and the pressure of the man’s fingers hot against his cheeks, and everything feels like it’s finally falling into place.
“You’re the only one.”
They collapse together, tea resting on the nightstand, leaving their bodies to tangle. Safe from the world, their figures intertwine and weave a warmth in between them. The duvet is up to their chins and they’re swimming in the comfort of this feeling, this feeling they’ve missed, longed for, and even though it’s only been one night it’s almost too much to bear. Viktor’s arms find themselves around Yuuri’s neck, touching the skin near his nape delicately as if not to break him. Yuuri follows with his hands squeezing at the small of Viktor’s back and pulling him in. They lie there, charting stars in the freckles and dents in the skin they touch upon, and their eyes shut in all the calm.
When Viktor wakes up, the sun is sleeping under clouds and blue-grey streaks are broken by the blinds, but this time, nothing comes to mind. Instead, when his heavy eyelids lift from their rest, they take in all the glow of pale skin and tousled black hair. Where the light meets the bedsheets and shadows split down the centre, a warmth rises through his body and makes his head light. Just as the sun is with its slumber and the skies are grey with their billowing, Viktor relaxes into the touch of Yuuri, and every piece of his body collapses into the feeling of home.
It’s mornings like these where Viktor doesn’t need to remember anything, because everything is right here.