Chapter Text
MARCH 2019
The guys were all in the locker room getting changed after practice when Coach LeClaire came in.
“Roz!” He bellowed. “Since when did you get a Canadian passport?”
“What?” The group collectively gasped, stopping their conversations to focus on LeClaire.
“Few weeks ago” Roz shrugged, like it wasn’t a big deal.
“Let’s try again. HOW did you get a Canadian passport?” LeClaire growled. “You are not from Canada nor do you live in Canada.”
“I marry Canadian person. I get Canadian passport.” He explained.
“You are married?” Marlow yelled, clearly shocked by the statement.
“Yes.” Ilya picked up the ring on his necklace to show them. “See? Ring.”
“Who the fuck would marry you?” Carmichael yelled from the far corner as everyone laughed.
“Fuck you.” Ilya snapped.
“When did you get married?” Marlow asked, a little more serious now.
“One or two years ago.” Ilya could see the gears turning in Marlow’s head as the rest of the room went silent.
Then St-Simon jumped in. “You’ve picked up more women than the rest of the team combined. How the fuck are you married? How many times have you cheated on her?”
“Vic” Marlow snarled. “Be nice.”
“Maybe they have an open marriage. She must know what he’s like.” One of the defensemen offered.
“No!” Ilya quickly hissed. “No cheating!” But everyone’s eyes were on him. “When was last time you saw me pick up woman? I have ring for how long and no one questioned?”
That seemed to shut everyone up for a minute. “He’s been wearing that ring since the start of last season. No one said a word about it.” One of the goalies finally chimed in.
“Why didn’t you tell us?” Miller asked.
“Everyone looked back to Ilya for an explanation. “You did not ask.” He pointed out.
“How could you get married and not invite us?!” Marlow finally added with a cackle.
“Was small wedding. And did not want to scare them away.”
“When do we get to meet her?” St-Simon questioned.
“Never! You think I am crazy? Will not let any of you ruin it.” He snarked. “End of discussion. Go do something.” He ordered, shutting down the interrogation.
A few minutes later, as the locker room started to clear out, Marlow pulled him aside. “You really got married.” He said quietly, and Ilya just nodded.
“Good for you, man.” He smiled. “You really do seem much happier these days.”
They had always been close, Marlow was probably his best friend on the team. And while he did feel a little bad about hiding it from him, he didn’t have a choice. Ilya felt like Marlow would understand. He had said a lot of very positive things about Scott Hunter after he came out. But Ilya’s situation was different.
“Whenever you are ready, I would really like to meet her. Just me, not the guys.” He added. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to keep this a secret.”
“Maybe” Ilya mumbled, trying not to be suspicious.
“Wait, she’s Canadian? No way, is this Montreal Girl?” He grinned. “Oh wow, I should have known. She always got you all wound up. Can’t believe you put a ring on it though. Never thought you had it in you.”
“What you mean?” Ilya growled at the insult.
Marlow laughed. “Just never thought you could be tamed, that you would settle down. Roz, I’ve known you for like ten years, you’ve always been a little… wild?”
“Am still wild. Has not changed me.”
Marlow shook his head. “Never change man, never change.”
As he turned to walk away, Ilya asked one final question. “What is open marriage?”
Marlow cackled. “Ask your wife” he yelled back.
Now that Ilya had his citizenship and Canadian passport, they both felt a little more settled with their situation. Ilya was finally truly safe, and they didn’t have to worry as much if they got caught.
That didn’t mean they were going to come out, or take any unnecessary chances, but they could relax just a little bit.
Ilya didn’t care that his team knew about their marriage. Most of the guys couldn’t care less about each other’s personal lives, and it didn’t change anything for them. Occasionally there would be comments or questions, but Ilya usually chose to ignore them, or throw back a snarky response that would shut everyone up.
Shane had been wanting to tell Hayden for awhile, but he didn’t quite know how. It wasn’t that he thought Hayden was going to have a problem with him being gay, but he knew Hayden would overreact when he found out Shane was with Ilya.
He’d been building up to it for awhile, trying to figure out how to tell him, how to explain it. Finally, he and Ilya agreed that the best option was just to rip off the band aid. Ilya was going to be in Montreal that weekend, so they would use the opportunity.
Shane usually had dinner with the Pike family at least once a week when they weren’t traveling. Jackie loved having him there, calling him one of her children, and was always willing to cook something that fit into his restrictive diet.
After dinner that week, the kids had all disappeared, running off to play a game, and leaving the three adults at the table.
“Hey, so Lily is going to be in town this weekend. I thought maybe you all could meet?” He chose his words carefully, not wanting them to feel obligated and trying not to make it a big deal about it. Even though it was a big deal.
Hayden and Jackie knew of Lily’s existence, but not by Shane’s choice. Over the years, Hayden had caught on to the texting and Shane’s disappearances whenever they were in Boston, but Shane was always very tight lipped about their situation.
Every once in awhile, Jackie would ask, but Shane did his best to downplay it or provide only vague answers. He told himself over and over that they would understand if they knew the truth, but he could never bring himself to tell them.
“Oh my god! YES! Of course!” Jackie cried.
“Yeah, man. We’d love to meet her.” Hayden agreed.
“Just please don’t freak out, ok?” Shane asked, trying not to beg.
“Why would we freak out? We’ve been dying to meet her for YEARS. The secret girlfriend who’s had you whipped.” Hayden teased. Jackie smacked his arm.
“Be nice!” She growled at her husband. “Shane, we promise we will not freak out. We are so excited.”
After the Pike kids were in bed that night, Shane had gone home, and the house had been cleaned up, Jackie sat Hayden down on the couch.
“I need you to be cool about this.” She lectured.
“What do you mean?” He asked. Jackie just shook her head. Men were so dumb.
“Hayden, there is a reason Shane has kept Lily a secret for so long. Even from us. Any time I’ve asked him about her, he gets cagey.” She tried to explain. “He’s afraid we are going to judge him or not approve.”
“Of course not! If she makes him happy, then I approve.” Hayden threw back.
“I think it’s more complicated than that.” But Hayden just looked at her, not understanding. “Have you never wondered why he doesn’t talk about their relationship or hasn’t introduced us? Come on. This has been going on for years, maybe even as long as we’ve known him.”
“I don’t know, I thought they weren’t together maybe and it was just hooking up.” Hayden shrugged.
“Ok, even if that’s the case, why hide it? The rest of the guys on the team feel no shame in flaunting their exploits.” Hayden looked at her curiously. “And the last year or two, we both know it’s a lot more than just a hookup. He’s been different.”
“Clearly you have some suspicion, just spit it out.” Hayden groaned.
She shook her head. “I don’t know. I just have a feeling”.
When Shane and Ilya arrived at the Pike’s house on Saturday afternoon, they had a plan laid out. Ilya was going to wait outside at first, giving Shane a few minutes alone with Hayden and Jackie. Shane wanted to come out to them first and get that part out of the way before he introduced Ilya.
Shane was still nervous though, as much as Ilya tried to reassure him. “It will be fine. They love you.”
“I know.” He grumbled. “But they… hate you.”
Ilya had strong feelings about Hayden Pike simply because of his hockey career. The pair had often clashed on the ice, but everyone clashed with Ilya. Ilya had a reputation for being an asshole on the ice, and he did everything in his power to live up to it. Opposing teams hated him. Hayden Pike and the rest of the Metros hated him.
Shane knew that wasn’t who he really was though, that it was all just an act, a performance he put on. “They hate Rozanov. They will not hate Shane’s boyfriend.”
“You are not my boyfriend.” Shane joked. They had started teasing each other about it more in the past few months, finally getting more comfortable with their true status as husbands. They had also started wearing their wedding bands on their fingers when they were together.
Shane looked down at his left hand and spun the ring on his finger. “Your husband” Ilya corrected himself. “They will not hate your husband.”
“I hope not.” Shane whispered at he stepped out of the car.
Shane let himself into the house as he always did, finding Jackie in the kitchen.
“Hey!” She smiled when she saw him. “I thought Lily was coming. We were so excited to finally meet your mysterious person.”
“Uh… yeah. Lily is here, just waiting outside. I wanted to talk to you both first.” Shane stumbled over his words.
Jackie stopped what she was doing and turned her full attention to him. She could tell by his body language and shaky voice that this was serious. “Oh, yeah, ok.”
She called for Hayden to join them. “Can I make you some tea?” Shane nervously agreed.
Hayden came in a minute later and gave Shane a hug. “Where’s Lily?” Shane could hear the disappointment in his voice.
“Let’s sit down.” Jackie interrupted. She carried the coffee mugs and kettle with hot water to the table before grabbing the box of teabags and some sugar and milk.
“You’re scaring me” Hayden interrupted as they all sat down. “Is everything ok?”
Shane nodded. “Yeah, everything is fine. Lily is here. I just…” his voice trailed off nervously.
“You can tell us anything, Shane. You know that.” Jackie tried to reassure him. “We imagine you had a good reason to hide Lily for this long.”
“Yeah” Shane confirmed. It took him a minute to get the words out. “I’m gay.” He finally said. Hayden audibly gasped, while Jackie smiled widely.
Both Shane and Hayden immediately turned to her. “Did you know?” Shane whispered.
“I suspected.” She confirmed. “I hoped you would tell us when you were ready.”
“”But what about Rose Landry?” Hayden spit out.
“Hayden!” Jackie corrected him. “Shane, we love and support you, and accept you no matter what.”
It took Hayden a minute to process his shock. “Yeah man. We love you.”
“So then can I safely assume that Lily is a guy?” Jackie asked. “And that’s why it’s been such a secret?”
“Yeah.” Shane confirmed with a nod.
“Well then go get him, we want to meet him!” Jackie exclaimed.
Shane didn’t move though. “Thank you for being so understanding. But I need that to continue, ok?”
Jackie agreed and Shane walked away, stepping outside to collect Lily. As soon as he was out of sight, Jackie whispered to Hayden. “You need to behave.”
“Why?” He hissed. “It’s fine, I don’t care if he’s with a dude.”
“I think there is more to it than that.” Jackie said, and he gave her that look he always does, silently asking how she knows everything.
Two minutes later, Shane returned with Ilya in tow. “Hayden, Jackie, this is Ilya.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Hayden hissed.
“Swear jar!” Jackie snapped. The room fell silent for a minute as Ilya and Hayden glared at each other. Jackie finally broke the silence. “Ilya, it’s nice to finally meet you. I would say that Shane has told us a lot about you, but that is very much not the case.”
The joke relaxed Shane a tiny bit. “Please, sit. Can I get you something to drink?”
“Shane” Hayden growled. “Is this a joke?”
“No.” Shane admitted quietly. “It’s not. I’m sorry.”
“You have nothing to apologize for” Jackie interrupted.
“You’re really… dating him?” Shane could see the exasperation on Hayden’s face. He just nodded in response.
“It’s more than dating, isn’t it?” Jackie asked.
“What?” Hayden snapped. “What do you mean?”
“You’re married.” She said casually, a smile on her face.
“Yes” Ilya confirmed.
“How?” Hayden was still struggling to process, and kept looking back and forth between his wife and Shane and Ilya.
“They are both wearing wedding rings.” She explained.
“You are fu-” He caught himself before he cursed again. “You are MARRIED?”
“Please excuse my husband. He seems to be struggling through a nervous breakdown.” Jackie interjected, getting a nervous laugh from both of them. “Hopefully he is starting to understand why you’ve kept this a secret for so long.”
“I didn’t want to…” Shane started to explain, but quickly gave up, at a loss for words.
“How long has this been going on?” Hayden finally hissed, his question a little more cohesive then the yelling and grunts that had been spewing from his mouth the past few minutes.
Shane looked to Ilya to answer. “We knew each other before. We got together first time summer before rookie season.”
“Wow” Jackie whispered. ‘That’s a long time.”
Ruby and Jade, the Pike’s twins, came running into the kitchen at that moment, interrupting them. “Uncle Shane, Uncle Shane!” Jade yelled as she approached him.
“Who is this?!” Ruby growled as she noticed Ilya sitting next to him.
“This is my friend, Ilya. Ilya, meet Ruby and Jade.” Shane smiled as he introduced them.
“Hi” Ilya tried to say, but Jade’s hands were already on his, pulling at him.
“Come play with us!” Jade yelled, forcing him to his feet while Ruby did the same to Shane.
Shane turned and looked back at Jackie, who mouthed the word “go” with a smile. And with that, Shane and Ilya allowed themselves to be dragged away by a pair of mischievous Pike children.
Once they had all disappeared, Jackie turned her attention back to Hayden. “I need you to breathe. You are as white as a ghost and look like you are about to vomit.”
“What the fuck am I supposed to do?” He hissed as quietly as he could.
“You aren’t supposed to do anything. You are supposed to be happy for your best friend that he found his person. And that he finally felt safe enough to tell you about it.” Jackie lectured.
“But-”
“There are no buts here.” She interrupted. “Think about how hard this has been for him. How long he has been keeping this a secret. You don’t have to like Rozanov, Shane isn’t expecting you to welcome him with open arms. But you need to at least give him a chance, for Shane’s sake.”
Hayden shook his head in disbelief.
After thirty minutes of high pitched squeals coming from the living room, Jackie finally announced that dinner was ready.
She did not expect Ilya to walk into the kitchen with Jade hanging from his neck and Ruby being carried upside down in his arms. The look of shock on Hayden’s face was absolutely priceless.
The twins bombarded him with questions during the meal. “Where do you live? Are you also a hockey player? Why do you have a funny accent?” Jackie tried to stop them, but Ilya assured her it was fine as he patiently answered each one of their questions.
“The girls seem to like him” she whispered teasingly to Hayden, but he only glared at her in response.
Once dinner was cleaned up and the kids were put to bed, Jackie sat everyone down. “Hayden, do you have any questions you’d like to ask Shane or Ilya?” But Hayden just shook his head. “Well, how about when did you get married?”
“Before last season” Hayden interrupted, answering the question. Jackie looked at him confused. “Shane’s necklace. You said it was a gift from your parents.”
Shane nodded sadly. “We didn’t really plan it. Just sort of decided to do it one day.”
“What do your parents think?” Jackie asked nervously. “Do they know?”
“Yeah” Shane huffed. “But they kind of found out the hard way. We were at my cottage two summers ago and my dad showed up unexpectedly, caught us kissing.”
Hayden laughed. “Are you fucking kidding?”
“No” Ilya replied. “Shane, um, how you say, freaked out?”
“Ilya” Shane groaned, but Ilya just smiled.
“Is true” Ilya defended. “But they are good now. They love me.”
“Don’t look so surprised!” Jackie snapped at Hayden.
“What happens if people find out?” Hayden finally asked.
Shane frowned. “We will deal with it.” Ilya answered for him.
“It could be really bad.” Hayden whispered sadly.
“We know.” Shane agreed. “But we will take that chance.”
The conversation shifted from there, to lighter topics, less controversial things, with a little bit of joking and teasing thrown into it.
Once Shane and Ilya said their goodbyes, Jackie turned her attention back to Hayden.
“Do you get it now?”
“Yeah, a little.” He hesitantly admitted. “But I still don’t like him.”
“It’s a start.” Jackie smiled.
A few weeks later, back in Boston, Ilya asked Cliff Marlow to grab drinks after practice. Playoffs officially started the next day so this was the calm before the storm. This was the last quiet night they would have for awhile.
They claimed a table in the back of the bar, away from everyone else. It was a weeknight so the place is quiet, but Ilya still looked around to make sure they had some privacy.
“I still can’t believe you’re fucking married.” Marlow said as they took a sip of their beers. “And faithful too! I actually had to think about it for awhile and realized I couldn’t remember the last time you hooked up with someone.”
“Why so hard to believe?” Ilya smirked.
“This bullshit persona you’ve built, the asshole womanizer, doesn’t care about anything or anyone but himself.” Marlow explained.
“I don’t care what people think of me.” Ilya shrugged.
“We’re aware!” Marlow laughed. “Except perhaps what one specific person in Montreal thinks.”
“Yes, only one.”
“So when do I finally get to meet her?” He groaned. “I’ve been dying to for years, and now that I know the truth, I have to know what she’s like. And whatever her secret is for keeping you in line.”
“Is very good in bed” he snarked, and Marlow just smiled and shook his head.
“Did she explain what an open marriage was?” Marlow cackled.
“Oh yes, asshole. Was not funny! I knew I should not have asked.” Ilya growled. But it really was funny. He could have just googled it, but he forgot until he and Shane had talked that night. The shocked look on Shane’s face was priceless, Ilya laughed about it for a week afterward.
“You know you can’t hide her forever, right?”
“Why not?” Ilya snapped.
“Hey, seriously. What’s going on? You’ve alway been really cagey about this one. Then suddenly you’re married. Something doesn’t add up.” Marlow was watching him carefully, as if trying to read his mind, trying to figure out all of his secrets.
“People will not be happy.” Ilya huffed. “If they know.”
“That’s never been a problem for you before.”
“Is not like that. Could be very bad. For team.” Ilya tried to find the right words to explain, but was failing. He turned to look at Marlow finally and he knew he needed to tell him, to come clean, to explain. He need him to understand and hoped he could have Marlow in his corner if this all went to shit. “I’m bisexual.” He finally admitted.
“Oh” Marlow said, a surprised look on his face. “Wow.” He paused for a moment to collect himself. “So… Montreal girl isn’t…. a girl?”
Ilya shook his head. “No.”
Marlow nodded. “All this time.” He said to himself. “Now it’s starting to make sense.” He paused. “I want to meet him.”
“You already have” Ilya threw back.
Marlow gasped. “What? How? WHO?” But Ilya didn’t respond. “Another player?”
Ilya nodded. “You dog!” But then he started putting it all together. “It’s a Montreal player.” He mumbled. “Oh, NO FUCKING WAY! You are fucking with me.” Marlow looked around the bar quickly before he said it out loud. “Hollander. You are fucking Hollander!” It was not a question.
‘Yes” Ilya whispered as he pulls out his phone and opened his photos, scrolling to one that Yuna had taken of them a few months ago. Shane was smiling at the camera as Ilya pressed his lips to Shane’s cheek. It was his favorite picture of the two of them.
“You never cease to amaze me, Roz.” Marlow laughed as he shook his head.
Shane and Ilya both knew they had a long way to go, and that it wouldn’t be easy path. Every day that passed, the ran the risk of being outed, the risk of being caught. But even if they were, it didn’t matter. They would be ok. They had each other, and Shane could protect Ilya. They also had their friends and family, who loved them and supported them and accepted them for who they were. Even if some of them didn’t exactly like it.
Once Ilya’s contact was up with Boston, he would sign with a Canadian team and move closer to Shane. And if all the stars aligned, when Shane’s contract was up a few years later, he would try to make the jump also so the two of them could be with the same team.
They had already planned to start changing the narrative, publicly announcing their foundation and their friendship. If they managed to hide the truth long enough, they would come out on their own terms. But if they didn’t get the chance, that was ok. They loved each other, and that was all that mattered.