Chapter Text
"This guy?"
"Hmm… nope, I don't think we'll get along."
"Okay, then… maybe him? He has cats, too."
"Oh, really? Lemme see… w- wait, ten cats?! That's way too much!"
As Harumasa sat in front of the countless screens while Wise scrolled through many unfamiliar faces, he narrowed his own eyes, shook his head upon (not) reading another person's profile and sighed.
A part of him found what he is doing now rather… ridiculous. Ever since Wise suddenly offered to help him find a roommate, for the past few days, Harumasa had been reflecting on what he said that night thoroughly, and after many restless nights of replaying their conversation, he had gathered a few thoughts.
Firstly, Wise really is as kind as he thought. Actually, he may be even kinder than he originally took him to be.
Secondly, never joke about matters like this with Wise.
Since when he first said that if he didn't manage to somehow find someone to live with him, he would pass away, Harumasa had said that in hopes of relieving the sorrowful tension in the air. However, if his joke didn't land the way he wanted again in front of Wise, then perhaps he should stop joking about serious matters like this so Wise would not take it too seriously again.
Or perhaps he should stop treating his own life as something entertaining.
"Hmm… so even he does not qualify, huh?"
Hearing Wise mutter to himself, Harumasa stole a glance at him and saw Wise had his gaze completely trained on the screen. At first, Harumasa had thought that once he rejected enough people, Wise would then give up on this really impromptu (and really, rather silly) quest and forget about what he said that night. However, despite Harumasa kept turning people down, to the point that he even rejected someone just because 'their hair color reminds me of work,' Wise still only nodded in thought and offered another profile.
He really is so kind, huh?
"Ah, we're almost through the entire list. Fairy, are you sure you examined the data I gave you?" Wise asked, didn't see Harumasa looking at him with a small, apologetic smile and asked Fairy.
"Master, are you doubting me—the world's most advanced AI assistant—on her data analyzing skill?" A blue, blinking avatar then popped up on a nearby screen. With another blink as her avatar looked to be giving a frown, Fairy said, "Here is a reminder for you, dear Master, your AI assistant is merely a supporting character, and the ability to actually make decisions is in your hands."
"T- That sounds oddly passive aggressive." With a light laugh, Wise scrolled through some more files on another screen and said, "Fairy, I do appreciate your work. I'm just saying that it is kind of unusual for no one to be compatible with Harumasa up to this point."
"M- Me?" Suddenly hearing his name called, Harumasa quickly straightened his back, cleared his throat and said, "I- I mean, I'm making a serious decision here! I cannot just have a random person live with me!"
"Indeed. However, Mister Asaba…" Fairy said while dragging her words, and with another blink, she said in her forever flat voice, "With that many data processed through my impeccable analyzing skill, it feels as though you are rejecting everyone on purpose."
"Hey, Fairy." Before Harumasa could widen his eyes and quickly refute, Wise tapped a finger on Fairy's screen and said, "Don't say that; Harumasa is right. This isn't something that he can just decide randomly. After all, we'd want to make sure that this person can actually help Harumasa, and not make his life worse, right?"
Wise then suddenly turned and gave Harumasa a gentle smile. Blinking his eyes nervously while nodding quickly, Harumasa said, "Y- Yeah! I knew you would understand, Wise."
And as he pressed his back to the chair again, Harumasa crossed his arms in front of his chest and held tightly to them. Watching Wise work through more files with Fairy, Harumasa then darted his gaze away upon sensing Fairy staring at him and sighed again.
Harumasa knew that she was right, however, what he said wasn't wrong either. If someone on that list do somehow match Harumasa's personality, how selfish it would be for him to say 'yes?' To let them see him tremble on the floor, not knowing when it will all end as they could only watch helplessly? Living this life had already been tough for Harumasa, and there was no way that he would knowingly drag another person into this mess. But…
With another glance at Wise, Harumasa saw him stretch his arms over his head, yawned into a fist but quickly recomposed his expression into something befitting for a kind, gentle manager. Making Wise work on something futile was not Harumasa's intention, and seeing Wise even more tired than before only made him regret dumping all those fractured, panicking and breathless words at him last time.
Therefore, with a nod to himself as he decided that the sooner they get this over with, the quicker Wise can rest and let him handle the surely genuine, totally not awkward conversation with a random person on the list, Harumasa decided that he would say 'yes' to whoever appears next.
After all, how hard would having a conversation with a random person be for the bright and silly Executive Officer of Section Six?
Worst case scenario—he would just have to call Tsukishiro and beg for her help—like how he always handled weird, awkward conversations with weird, awkward people.
With a deep breath as Harumasa closed his eyes, he started counting down from three in his mind. And after hearing two more clicks on the mouse, he said without opening his eyes,
"They're it."
"O- Oh!" Wise then let out a gasp. With a turn, he gave Harumasa a surprised smile and said, "That's wonderful! They're the last person on the list, too."
"Well, that must mean they really are meant to live with me, right?" Laughing the tinge of weirdness in his chest away, Harumasa tried to not picture how terrifying it would be and peeked at the screen behind Wise. "So, who's the lucky star?"
"Ah, I think you will get along really well with them," Wise said while nodding delightfully. With a step aside, he gestured to the bright screen behind him and said, "That person is—"
Harumasa first blinked due to the brightness of the screen, but quickly blinked two, three, four more times upon the name and picture on it.
No, no way…
"Seth! What a coincidence, right?" Wise clapped his hands while Fairy spun delightfully in the background. However, Harumasa's own expression could barely echo their cheerful ones. Since with one more look at the screen as purple eyes stared right back at him, he realized he could only widen his eyes and say,
S- Set—
"SETH LOWELL??" Harumasa stood up, held tightly to the monitor before him and almost started shaking it. "N- No way, why would Seth be here—"
"Well, Mister Asaba, according to my data, you and Seth Lowell were in the same academy—"
"I KNOW THAT!" Dismissing Fairy's purposefully calm voice, Harumasa pressed a hand to his forehead, wondered why the universe seemed to have a personal grudge against him and muttered to himself, "W- What are the chances that I picked Seth randomly just like that? How—"
"Hmm? Did you say something?" Leaning close upon hearing Harumasa's murmur, Wise then quickly backed off upon Harumasa waving his hands frantically and smiling nervously. With a slight frown, Wise said, "Harumasa, I understand that this may be a bit nerve-wracking, but Seth can actually be a pretty good roommate!"
"I- I guess..?" Holding tightly to his own head while imagining a world of Seth and him being roommates, Harumasa quickly shook that terrifying image of him being scolded by Seth due to him leaving clothes on the floor and said, "Wait, no. T- There's no way that—"
"It's okay. Remember that this will just be a test of seeing whether you two will get along or not," Wise said while patting Harumasa's shoulder. Seeing Harumasa slowly set his hands down from his own head, Wise smiled and continued, "You two can just… hang out for an afternoon like usual! After that, if you think Seth can be a suitable roommate for you, you can ask him."
"R- Right…" Feeling slightly calmed but immediately anxious again upon seeing Seth's eyes staring at him from the screen, Harumasa hugged his arms close to his chest and said, "So… what should we do? I haven't hung out with Seth for ages, and I heard he's really busy these days, so—"
"Don't worry, I'll handle everything." Patting Harumasa shoulder again while grabbing his own phone, Wise smiled confidently at Harumasa and said, "I'll text Seth, and you'll just have to follow me and hang out with him for an afternoon! Sound good?"
"O- Okay…" Nodding lightly as he watched Wise smile delightfully at him, Harumasa somehow felt both soothed yet stressed by that smile and held tightly to his own arms. However, in a way, it was rather fortunate that he picked Seth other than some random guy. After all, they've done many team-building activities in the academy (though many of which ended with Harumasa teasing Seth to the point he snapped at him). Therefore, taking a trip down memory lane surely wouldn't be too bad, right?
… Right?
"Annnd… he's here! Hey, Seth!"
Waving delightfully toward the pair of folded silver ears, Harumasa called out to Seth, watched his tail flick in shock and waved him over.
"Aww, Seth! It has been ages since I've hung out with you like this!" Harumasa said after Seth dragged his steps and finally stood next to him. Looping an arm around his shoulder, he said, "Y'know, we really have to thank Wise for this, right?"
However, despite Wise giving Harumasa a smile while nodding, Seth only sighed and patted Harumasa's arm off of his shoulder. "S- Sure. But Asaba, remind me about a couple of things again."
"Of course! However, I think this is pretty self-explanatory." Harumasa then gestured to their surroundings with a wide smile, hoping that Seth would return one.
"No, this is not self-explanatory at all." To that, Seth only frowned and ignored Harumasa's grin. "Firstly, manager's text didn't explain anything other than 'Harumasa needs someone to hang out with,' and apart from that being weird already…"
Seth then paused his words for a moment, and after a deep breath, he tried his best to not raise his voice and pointed directly below their feet.
"Why are we in a sandpit?"
Why indeed.
"Ahaha… Well, don't you think it's gonna be fun? The kids love it here." Laughing lightly while kicking some sand, Harumasa waved toward a couple of curious kids as they immediately ran away. Directing that wave back to Seth instead, Harumasa said, "You've been pretty stressed out these days, right? So why not build a sandcastle with your favorite senior from the academy to relax?"
"I- *sigh…*" Sighing into his hand while trying his best to not roll his eyes, Seth darted his gaze to the side and said, "Asaba, you are indeed a senior I look up to. However, I really have a lot of work later, so—"
"So… let's do this, right?" Attempting to loop an arm around Seth's stiff shoulder again, Harumasa watched his arm got swiftly dodged. Pouting at Seth, Harumasa then decided to shoot Wise a pleading glance.
"U- Umm, Seth. I'm really sorry that we are bothering you during your break, however, try treating this as a… team-building activity!" Walking closer to the two while giving Seth an awkward smile, Wise grabbed a plastic shovel from his bag and handed it to Seth. "Like what Harumasa said, since you're under a lot of pressure these days, taking your mind off for a while will surely be helpful, right?"
"I- I guess so…" Frowning at the cute, oddly tiny shovel while tentatively accepting it, Seth first darted his gaze to Wise's awkward smile, then to Harumasa's pleading, sparkling eyes and sighed again. "So… I just need to somehow build a sandcastle, right?"
"Right! And with me, of course!" Clapping his hands delightfully while grabbing a shovel from Wise as well, Harumasa gestured for Seth to squat down and said, "I promise that we will make the best sandcastle that New Eridu has ever seen!"
After glancing around them nervously, Seth then finally squat down next to Harumasa and muttered something about being teased to no end if he was caught building a sandcastle during his break. And as he met Harumasa's sparkling eyes with a deeper frown, he slowly said, "You're sure that this isn't some kind of elaborate plan of making fun of me again, right?"
"Oh, of course not! It's not like something like that has happened before, right?" Adding a bit of tease in his words, Harumasa ignored Seth secretly rolling his eyes and said, "Anyways, let's do this! I'll work on the foundation and you can work on the castle first, yeah?"
And as Seth reluctantly started shoveling sand into a bucket (that was also cute and oddly tiny) that Wise handed him, Harumasa then started dragging his shovel across the sand. Lifting his gaze up, he saw Wise sitting on a nearby bench—a small, encouraging smile on his face.
He still remembered what Wise told him on their way here, and the shock he felt when he learned that he would actually be building a sandcastle with Seth on the sandpit in Lumina Square's playground.
"It would be a good team-building activity!" Wise said. "You could both work on something simple together and see if you two would get along," he said, straight-faced while grabbing a bag full of sandcastle-making equipment and putting it to the back of his car.
Replaying their conversation in his mind, Harumasa almost let out an amused laugh at how determined and serious Wise looked while proposing such a silly task like this—with his sandcastle building partner being the serious, hard-working and really-fun-to-tease junior Seth Lowell, too.
Although the purpose of this activity was to see whether they could live together, Harumasa had already had an answer,
absolutely no way.
No way that he is hearing Seth criticize his certainly healthy diet of energy drinks for breakfast every morning; no way that he is watching Seth pick up his clothes angrily from the floor and thus destroying the perfect sorting method that he created,
and no way that he would let Seth be the one see him potentially collapse on the floor, shaking and gasping for air as seconds turned into eternity.
With a deep breath to shake that image away, Harumasa poked his shovel into the sand and heard Seth mutter, "Would half a bucket be too much? How much water is too much?"
Still so serious even they're doing something so ridiculous, huh?
As Harumasa watched how Seth's shoulders tensed upon some sand sliding out of his shovel, Harumasa decided that this would no longer be an activity to see if Seth would be the roommate for him and smiled to himself.
He would just have to make up another excuse to Wise and apologize to him later.
"Hey, Seth?" After making up his mind, Harumasa raised his voice and started poking holes into the sand with his shovel. "Can you see if this foundation will work? I don't really know what I'm doing."
"Sure… Wait, what are you doing?!" Setting the bucket aside and turning to face Harumasa, Seth immediately widened his eyes and shifted near him. "There are holes everywhere! Do you know what a 'foundation' means?"
"Well, apparently, I have no idea!" With a laugh as he set his chin on his hands, Harumasa thoughtfully stepped aside and allowed Seth to deal with his plot of sand. "So… would you be so kind to fix it for your silly senior?"
"F- Fine…" After a sigh, Seth then reluctantly took over Harumasa's spot and started smoothing out the sand. Harumasa then seized this moment to shift closer to the bucket, and with a peek into it, he saw the bucket almost completely full of sand, its surface perfectly flat.
Harumasa then nodded in satisfaction, he wouldn't expect anything less from his hard-working, serious junior.
"Harumasa..?"
Hearing Wise call out to him quietly, Harumasa watched Wise mouth 'What are you doing?' with a frown, and after mouthing a quiet 'I got this!' back to Wise, Harumasa then glanced at the bucket of sand again.
Next up, step two.
Holding the bucket with a hand, Harumasa quickly and precisely dragged his finger across the surface. With a couple of dots there and a smooth, clean drag, Harumasa looked at his work and nodded contently to himself.
"Okay… this is finally done. And then…" With Seth turning toward him, Harumasa quickly covered the bucket with his hand and was met with an immediate frown. Staring at Harumasa in that same, tired look, Seth asked, "What are you doing with the bucket?"
"N- Nothing!" Harumasa laughed and glanced at the plot of sand behind Seth—perfectly flat and stable. Smiling while gesturing at it, he said, "Oh! Great work on that! I'm so proud of you."
With Seth resisting the strong urge to roll his eyes again, he instead sighed, dropped his tail to the ground weightlessly and ignored the sparkles in Harumasa's eyes. "Thanks, I guess. Anyways, can you hand me the bucket now?"
"Oh, of course! But are you sure you're ready?" Covering the surface of the bucket with another hand too, Harumasa dragged the bucket closer to himself and said, "It's going to be shocking!"
"Asaba, sand isn't 'shocking'." With another sigh as he didn't even bother with hiding it, Seth then extended his arm toward the bucket and said, "You know what, I'll just—"
"Ta-da!!"
Showing the surface of the bucket to Seth, Harumasa held the bucket tightly in his hands, a bright smile on his face as he gestured to it. "Look, Seth! A smiley face!"
However, to his dismay, Seth's expression was the exact opposite of a smiley face.
His expression was probably more akin to the blob of sand that slid out of the bucket and plopped onto the ground.
"H- Ha—" Hearing a light laugh from his side that quickly got replaced by a cough, Harumasa turned to face Wise and direct that bright smile to him instead—at least someone's happy!
"S- Sure. Just give it to me, please." After giving Harumasa and his masterpiece a nod, Seth then grabbed the bucket from him and carefully flipped it over—but still let out a frustrated sigh at himself upon some sand sliding to the side.
Harumasa then observed Seth's deepening frown and lowered tail. Well, it seems his task has not succeeded yet.
Letting out a small sigh in thought while watching Seth pile more sand near their castle, Harumasa quickly thought of the things that may help him achieve his goal. If being a bit annoying had not worked, and being silly while adding some compliment was futile too, then perhaps Harumasa need to get creative with his strategy.
Darting his gaze to Wise's bag, Harumasa's eyes immediately lit up upon seeing a shining plastic bag peeking from within.
This will definitely do the trick.
Quickly shifting to Wise's side and grabbing the thing from his bag, Harumasa then gestured for Wise to follow him. Although confused, Wise still nodded, allowed himself to be guided into the sandpit as they both squatted behind Seth.
"Harumasa, what are you—" And as Harumasa quickly gestured a finger above his own lips, Wise then pressed his own together and glanced nervously at Seth.
However, Harumasa was sure that Seth—for the time being—would not turn to face them suddenly. With his tail dropped to the ground while he kept muttering about things that were bothering him, Harumasa knew from the academy that these were Seth Lowell's signature signs of him entering his own zone, and would thus be completely unaware of his surroundings.
Opening the bag in his hand quickly, Harumasa grabbed two of its content from within and stuffed them into Wise's hands.
"Here, hold these. And…" After making sure that Wise was holding the things with immense confusion, Harumasa grabbed a couple more from the bag, shook his own hair loose and started finding spots to attach the things.
"Wait, Harumasa. Are you..?" And as Wise's eyes no longer widened from confusion, Harumasa watched the glints in Wise's eyes turn into amusement, turn into suppressed laughs as he quickly covered his mouth with a hand.
After making sure the things in his hair were properly attached, Harumasa gave Wise a nod, saw Wise return one to him with growing amusement in his eyes and grew more confident with his plan.
If even this doesn't work, then perhaps what Seth really needs is to take an entire week off.
"Hey, Seth?" Poking Seth's shoulder, Harumasa gestured for Wise to shift closer to him and said, "Can you look over here for a second?"
"Ugh, what do you want—"
The moment that Seth turned toward them, Harumasa cupped his own hands around his cheeks, made sure that Wise was holding the flags properly as he felt tiny flags in his hair flutter in the wind.
"Ta-da!!" Harumasa extended his arms into the air, tried his best to meet Seth's wide, shocked eyes and said, "Annnd this is how you're going to put the flags on the castle when it's done!"
"A- And I've got flags in my hands, I guess?" Laughing awkwardly while waving the tiny flags to Seth, Wise eyed them and said, "They're kind of tiny though."
For a moment, Harumasa stared at Seth with a bright smile, tried to not let it drop as he hoped that making a fool of himself on a children's playground would be worth it. And as he watched Seth inhale another deep breath, the shovel in his hand dropped to the ground, Harumasa wondered whether Seth would actually snap at him for real this time when suddenly—
"H- Haha—"
Watching Seth drop to the ground, arms behind him as he laughed loudly into the air, Harumasa finally felt the huge weight in his chest disappeared and shifted closer to him. "What are you laughing for? I'm literally trying to show you how to properly put the flags on when our castle's done!"
"H- Haha— Shut up, everyone knows how to do that." Laughing brightly while he struggled with meeting Harumasa's eyes, Seth nudged Harumasa away, sat up straight and glanced at Wise. "You should at least hold it in your hand like manager; you only look stupid like that."
"Hey, did you just call me stupid?! I'm so hurt!" Pressing a hand to his chest dramatically, Harumasa gave the both of them a surely convincing sigh and lowered his head. "How could you disregard my efforts just like that? I'm trying to help, too!"
"Yeah, yeah. Can you please take those flags out of your hair now? People are starting to look at us weirdly now." With a glance around the curious crowd that was peeking at the playground, Seth gestured to Harumasa's hair and smiled, finally.
Seeing his mission accomplished, Harumasa mirrored that smiled as well and said, "Fine, but don't expect me to demonstrate it twice."
Shifting close to the sandcastle while hearing Seth mutter 'Please don't do that ever again,' Harumasa took the flags out of his hair and extended a hand toward Wise, gesturing for him to come closer as well. With the three surrounding the sandcastle, Harumasa clapped his hands together and said, "Okay, I guess now's the time for some finishing touches, huh?"
"Yeah, I mean, with me doing everything, it should probably be left for you." Picking some sand out of his nails while flicking more out of his tail, Seth wrinkled his nose and said, "I'm going to go wash my face and hands. Handle the rest, yeah?"
"Of course! Leave it to me!" Waving toward Seth as he stood up, Harumasa gave him another wide smile and watched Seth left the playground.
"Okay!" Sitting down on the sand while setting the flags aside, Harumasa carefully placed his hands around the castle and said, "So… how should I do this? I mean, I guess I should just refine the edges, right—"
"You're such a kind friend, Harumasa."
"H- Huh?" Letting out a gasp as his hands hovered in the air, Harumasa faced Wise and was met with the familiar small smile. With a smile of his own surfacing, Harumasa stared at the sandcastle and asked, "What do you mean? I have no idea what you're talking about."
"I mean, what you did to Seth earlier." Sitting down next to Harumasa, Wise set his chin on a hand, another dragging across the sand mindlessly as he said, "You were doing all those things on purpose just to make him smile, right?"
"I- I… perhaps?" Laughing lightly while feeling his face warming slightly, Harumasa allowed a smile to appear on his face and pressed his fingers into the sides of the castle. "Or… maybe I'm just being silly as usual! What do you think?"
"Haha, I'll believe my own judgment then." Nodding to himself while watching some sand slide off of the castle's walls due to Harumasa's touches, Wise shifted closer to Harumasa and pressed his own hands near the castle's walls. "Y'know, this is how you're supposed to do it."
And as Wise carefully pushed sand onto the walls and patted them, Harumasa widened his eyes and said, "Wow, I never know that you're good at making sandcastles, too! Is that why you suggested for us to do this in the first place?"
"Well… kinda," Wise said while patting more sand onto the walls. With a slight shift as he almost pressed his shoulder onto Harumasa's, he traced a finger across the base of the castle and said, "Belle and I used to play with sand in our academy's playground. That is also why I have all those… oddly tiny shovels and bucket."
"Oh, so that's why!" Laughing as he glanced at the bucket, Harumasa used this chance to carefully shift himself slightly away from Wise and said, "I bet you two were making the best castles in the entire academy."
"Well, most of the time it was Belle forcing me to build castles for her while she secretly pours sand into my shoes." With a light sigh as he patted the sandcastle, Wise lowered his gaze and looked at his own fingers. "And after cleaning my own shoes, I had to clean mine and her nails, too."
"Really? Ah, now that you've mentioned it, I have sand under my nails as well." Extending his hands in front of him as he observed his nails, Harumasa brought his hands close and tried to pick some sand out. "And they're stuck so deep as well! How do you even get them out of there—"
"Like this."
Holding onto Harumasa's hand and bringing him close naturally, Wise carefully curled Harumasa's fingers and started using his own to pick some sand out. "Gently push your fingertips, try to use your other fingernails to reach under them, and get as much out without hurting yourself."
"W- Wise, Wise, wait—" Watching Wise hold tightly onto his hand as his own breathing somehow started shaking lightly, Harumasa tried to pull his hand back and said, "It's, it's fine! I can clean them later, so—"
"It's okay, I can help you. After all…" Lightly sighing his words out while picking another speck of sand out, Wise paused his gestures for a moment and met Harumasa's eyes—smiling. "You can't always be the one taking care of everyone else, right?"
H- Huh..?
Watching Wise smile gently while holding his hand, Harumasa replayed Wise's words mentally, turned them over in his mind again and inhaled a deep breath. Was that what he was doing? Always taking care of others and ignoring his own feelings? Harumasa had never thought of his silly words and gestures as that valiant, but before he could fully figure out an answer, he felt Wise's grip on his hand loosened. "Unless… you don't want me to do this?"
"N- No!" With the word flying out on its own, Harumasa almost wanted to cover his own mouth in shame and bit into his lip. But upon Wise nodding with delight and directing his focus back to his hand again, Harumasa sighed, tried his best to stop his breathing from shaking and quietly watched Wise clean his nails.
Palm pressed to the back of his hand, fingers one, two, three removing rough sand and planting soft warmth into his skin. Harumasa felt his breathing halt, but immediately shook again as waves of warmth overwhelmed his mind. Pull your hand away, he could hear a lowered, nagging voice from the back of his mind trying to convince him, but really, why would his mind tell him to do that? If Wise was doing this for him genuinely while he had agreed to it all, why would he want to shook Wise's hand away and hid his own dirty, covered-in-calluses hands behind another bright, surely not shaking smile?
If feeling good is supposed to make him stay; why does he want to run away?
"So… what do you think about today?"
"H- Huh?" Gasping as Wise's voice snapped him out of his thoughts, Harumasa quickly forced himself to stop staring at their hands and said, "I- I think today's pretty nice! It was fun making the sandcastle, and helping Seth relax, too."
"Haha, I'm glad to hear that." Nodding lightly as he remained focused on Harumasa's fingers, the sheer concentration that Wise had on them made Harumasa started to wonder whether there were actually that much sand stuck in there. With a light poke, Wise then asked, "So… do you think you guys can live together?"
Oh right that's still a thing.
"I- I mean… I don't think so," Harumasa stuttered, darted his gaze to the side upon the weird feeling in his chest and said, "I think Seth and I are best like this. Like, can you imagine him scolding me just because I feel like putting flags in my hair again?"
"Haha, that's a good point." Watching Wise laugh lightly as his grip tightened for a second, Harumasa felt his chest tighten too and watched Wise's hair got colored the shade of the setting sun. Orange. Silver. Almost like gold. "Friends and roommates are still two different things, right?"
"Y- Yeah…" Nodding in more guilt as he curled his fingers, Harumasa glanced at Wise holding his hand, felt the guilt in his chest swell alongside the prolonged time of him doing so and sighed. "So… I'm really sorry for wasting your time today, Wise."
"Hey, don't say that!" Lightly tugging on Harumasa's hand, a frown suddenly appeared on Wise's face. "The main goal for today is to have fun, and since we have already achieved that, it wasn't a waste of time."
As certain as ever, huh?
Feeling Wise hold onto his hand tightly while nodding, Harumasa pressed his own lips together, wondered whether he should return the squeeze as Wise nodded with resolve again. Always so serious, paying so much attention to someone who never treated himself as significant. The sheer focus on Wise's face almost perplexed Harumasa again, and with another breath, he directed his gaze toward their hands.
Four fingers being held in his hand, Harumasa's hanging awkwardly in the air, but Wise still held onto it nonetheless.
So new, so unfamiliar, so… nice?
Almost feeling terrified at the thought, Harumasa inhaled a shaking breath, decided that this is for the sake of making Wise smile and held back to Wise's hand. "Yeah, today's not a waste of time. Thanks, Wise."
Seeing a bright smile then bloomed on Wise's face, eyes in crescent moon shapes again, Harumasa felt some joy released into his mind while thinking that perhaps a part of him could only steal joy from others' smiles.
But he still enjoyed it, nonetheless.
"Hey, are you guys done yet?"
Hearing Seth call out to them, Harumasa seized this moment to quickly pull his hand out of Wise's and said, "Y- Yeah! We're almost done."
"Really? I bet manager helped you with everything, huh?" After making his way up the stairs and stood next to the two again, Seth set his hands on his hips and asked.
"R- Right! How would I live without—"
Wait, no.
"How would I… build this sandcastle without Wise, huh?"Quickly stopping himself before making another joke (that Wise may take too seriously again), Harumasa waved his hands in front of himself and laughed his nervousness away.
"Haha, I think we all contributed though." And as Wise laughed lightly while gesturing for them all to sit around the sandcastle, Wise took out the bag of tiny flags again and said, "And now, for the final step."
Wise then grabbed two flags from the bag, handed a yellow one to Harumasa and a blue one to Seth, and as he grabbed an orange one himself, he pointed at the top of the castle and said, "Let's put the flags on, take a picture and call it a day, yeah?"
"Wait, but wouldn't that be too many flags—"
"Oh, come on Seth, there's no need to be so serious about everything!" Nudging Seth's shoulder while letting out a small laugh, Harumasa twirled his flag between his fingers and said, "You're gonna have a migraine every night if you treat everything with that much focus."
"R- Really?" Tilting his head to the side for a second, Seth said, "Fine, I guess I can be a bit careless today."
And as Seth shook his head while smiling to himself, he set his flag at the edge of the castle—tilting to the side, without thinking of falling.
"Okay! If junior Seth has put his flag in an awkward spot like that…" Ignoring Seth widening his eyes and refuting his words, Harumasa laughed to himself and put his flag somewhere closer to the middle. "I guess this spot will do. Not too close to the edge but not in the center, too."
Harumasa then watched his yellow flag wave, not touching Seth's flag or the center while fluttering—holding onto the wind.
Perfectly safe for everyone involved.
"And now… for Wise!" Facing Wise with a bright smile, Harumasa gestured to the castle and said, "Where do you wanna put it? Well, since both Seth and I put our flags at such awkward spots, it would be natural for you to put it at the center, right?"
"Hmm, is that so?" Laughing lightly while thinking, Wise pinched the flag between his fingers and said, "However, I think this spot would be best."
And as Wise then extended his arm, he carefully set his flag in a just as awkward, illogical spot.
He set his flag between Seth's and Harumasa's; connecting their flags into a weird, colorful line.
"Well, that is also a pretty interesting place to put your flag!" Laughing lightly as Harumasa watched the tiny flags flutter and shine in the wind, he set his hands under his chin and said, "Why did you put it there though? Just randomly or..?"
"Well, I guess I did kind of go with my gut there. However…" And as Wise leaned in, shifting a little closer to Harumasa just so he could point at the castle, Harumasa felt an instinctive tightening in his chest as Wise turned, faced him and said,
"It's my job to help people connect, right?"
"H- Huh?" Letting out a gasp as Wise's small, gentle smile filled his vision, Harumasa instinctively shifted a little bit back and said, "I- I guess? Your work is all about… helping people, after all."
"Haha, yeah." With a light laugh as he turned to face the castle again, Wise poked his orange flag, pushed it slightly closer to the yellow flag and said, "So… I'm glad that my work today has made someone happy."
And as Harumasa watched the orange flag tilt to the center, almost leaning on the yellow flag, he somehow felt the weird tightening in his chest swell and quickly coughed into his fist.
"A- Anyways!" Suddenly raising his voice while clapping his hands together, Harumasa ignored both Seth's confused frown and Wise's small smile and said, " Let's just take a picture together and be done for the day, yeah? Seth needs to go back to work, too!"
"Oh, right! Let's make this quick then." Letting out a small gasp, Wise then took out his phone, opened the camera and gestured for them all to stand close.
And as Harumasa stared at himself in the screen—his arms hugged close to his own chest while Wise pressed their shoulders together, the add-on weight on his other side from Seth's light nudge made him smile a little.
Perhaps he should try being the one initiating these team-building activities next time.
"And done! I'll send the picture to you both later." After a click, Wise pocketed his phone and said to Seth, "Thank you for hanging out with us today, Seth. I hope Zhu Yuan wouldn't be too mad if we accidentally took up your work time?"
"Nah, I think I still have—" However, after a quick check on his phone, Seth immediately widened his eyes and said, "Wait, no. I- I have to go right now. See ya, manager, Asaba!"
And before Harumasa could properly give Seth a wave, he watched him run down the stairs and toward the Public Security Office at full speed.
"Haha, Seth is as energetic as ever, huh?" Laughing lightly, Wise said as he tucked a strand of hair behind an ear.
"Yeah! He's been like that ever since our academy days—always running around and… being busy." Harumasa answered and mirrored Wise's laugh, hugging his own arms close to his chest.
One, two.
"Thanks—" "What do you—"
Widening his eyes upon their words overlapping, Harumasa met Wise's eyes, saw Wise's eyes doing the same as well and said, "U- Uh, you first."
"No! You can go first." Wise then gestured a hand to Harumasa, an awkward smile on his face.
Knowing that there would be no way for him to offer the same thing again, Harumasa then inhaled a deep breath and said, "Thanks… thank you for today, Wise."
"Ah, it's nothing, really. I had a lot of fun as well."
With a brief pause while feeling the air return to its prior awkward state, Harumasa pressed his own hands together, darted his gaze to the setting sun sinking below the horizon while wondering what he should say next. Thank him again? Mention something about sandcastles or Seth scolding him back in their academy days? A silly joke? Smile or laugh or—
"So… do you want to keep doing this, Harumasa?"
"H- Huh?" With a gasp as Wise's small frown filled his vision, Harumasa instinctively took a step back as confusion swirled in his own eyes too.
"I mean… this kind of 'team-building activity'." With a wave to gesture to their surroundings, Wise said, "Me helping you meet more people; trying to find someone to live with you, that kind of thing." And with him bringing his own hand back, he gave Harumasa an apologetic smile and said, "Since I… just kind of realized that I never asked your opinion properly, huh?"
Do I want that?
Harumasa asked himself, darted his gaze to the side as, for a moment, he could only hear the beating of his heart and not the bustling crowd of Lumina Square. Harumasa had known from the start that there was no way he would let another person live with him, wouldn't drag a random, innocent person into the mess that is his life and subject them to a life of watching him wither away. However, if that is the case, why couldn't he just say 'no?' Just tell Wise that this was a fun experience but maybe he should try something on his own, and keep their messages exclusively to hypothetical movie nights and silly cat pictures?
Harumasa felt the urge, the instinct to shake his head and muster up a surely genuine smile, but 'something' in his mind was stopping him from doing so.
Unfamiliar, deep, elusive—but he wanted that, and feared the very feeling setting into his mind.
With the ball of feelings in his head still unable to sort itself out, Harumasa decided to nod and reassure Wise first. "Y- Yeah, I think I wanna keep doing this. If it's not too much trouble for you, of course."
"Of course not! I have a lot of fun with helping you as well." With his frown blooming into a surprised smile, Harumasa tried to ignore his own smile surfacing instinctively as Wise clapped his own hands together. "I'll process some more data with Fairy tonight. However, perhaps we should try a different approach…"
And as Harumasa watched Wise set his hand under his chin, deep in thought while muttering things to himself again, he thought that perhaps it would be okay to keep this little mission alive for the sake of acquiring the ideal amount of dopamine per week to help him keep going.
"Ah, I shouldn't keep you standing here just to hear me mutter stuff to myself." Shaking his head to snap himself out of his thoughts, Wise gave Harumasa a gentle smile and said, "You must have work to do later, right? I'll send you whatever progress I have tonight."
"A- Actually—" Knowing that he had no more work for the day, Harumasa felt the innate urge to refute, to somehow prolong this pleasant feeling in the air even though he had no idea what he was going to say, but as his throat tensed itself, chest tightening again despite feeling perfectly fine for the past few hours, he knew what was about to happen next and quickly withdraw his own hand to his chest. "Y- Yeah! I think deputy chief assigned some work to me tonight."
Dammit.
"Ah, that must be rough, but I hope it won't be too much work." Wise nodded with a sympathetic frown, his hands pressed together as he glanced at the stairs—going down and down and down.
"I- It won't!" Harumasa felt his chest hurt a little, a hand pressed to it immediately as a nervous smile danced onto his face. "I- I mean, I'll handle it no problem."
Quick, quick leave this place.
"Haha, of course." Wise smiled, somehow oddly painful to look at as he said, "I'm sure you can handle it no problem, right?"
Now laugh, nod and—
"H- Haha, yeah!" Harumasa laughed, nodded, and before the tightening in his chest tried to break free, he turned away, ran away after tossing a barely audile 'See you' into the air.
See you, the next time I am fine again.
Staring at the countless screens before him, Wise sighed, pressed his forehead into his hands and slumped onto the table.
Perhaps he shouldn't have promised Harumasa that confidently earlier.
"Master, have you encountered another slump?"
Hearing Fairy's clear, digital voice from above, Wise sighed, buried his face deeper into his arms and pondered again.
It really was such an odd thing that this failed. With Fairy's analyzing skill combined with the data that basically included every New Eridu resident—logically, there ought to be someone out there that could match Harumasa's personality. However, these were all based on his initial guesses before letting Harumasa look over the files personally, and perhaps humans really are that unpredictable compared to machines.
At this point, it would probably be easier to find cats for Harumasa to adopt as roommates.
"Yeah, but… it's fine. I'm sure I can figure something out."
With another sigh to push his head up, Wise said, smiled to his own reflection in the screen and interlaced his fingers. After all, helping others had always been a central part of his identity. Guiding people out of Hollows; helping them with trivial quests and being paid with a genuine 'thank you'—hadn't that been who Wise was, how he felt his own existence when he could only helplessly watch his friends get injured through the countless screens before him?
There was no way for Wise to back down now. Not when Harumasa ran away again, a hand on his chest while his smile appeared to be just a bit unnatural again.
Therefore, with a clear of his throat, Wise said, "Fairy, keep everyone's data but delete the last one. I think if we process it again, we may find a couple more people that would get along with Harumasa."
With a blink of her screen, Fairy replied, "Understood. So delete Seth Lowell's data and keep everyone else's, right?"
What?
Wise felt his breathing halt for a moment. With his gaze oddly sharp, he stared at Fairy's screen. "You know that Seth's profile wasn't the last one, Fairy."
"Indeed. However, if that is the case—"
The air then froze. The blinking of the screens then somehow all stopped as Wise could only hear his heart pound in his chest, and with another breath—shallow, oddly shaking and with a tinge of confusion—he watched Fairy's screen blink once again as she asked,
"Why would you want to delete your own profile, Master?"
Sigh…
Breathing out an oddly heavy sigh, Wise stared at Fairy's screen, too many thoughts racing in his mind but he could capture nothing. Indeed, why would he want to do that? Or, why did he hide his own profile away from Harumasa, and tried his best to hide the tinge of nervousness when he told Harumasa that Seth was the last one on the list?
Wise, a video store manager, an older sibling, a proxy that gets the job done with no questions asked.
A stepping stone, a guide to help people achieve their goals.
For some reason, the realization made Wise feel a light stab in his chest, and as the odd feeling in his chest attempted to swell, he quickly stuff it deeper inside his mind and shook his head.
No use thinking about things like that when there's still work to be done.
Therefore, as Wise ignored Fairy's blinks and voice for a moment, Wise grabbed his phone, opened Knock-Knock and clicked on the photo they took earlier.
The setting sun, a sandcastle with three oddly-placed flags and smiles preserved for all eternity.
With a click as he sent the picture alongside some just as bright, just as warm text to Harumasa, Wise set his phone down and stared right back at Fairy.
"Because… I am his proxy."
Just, his proxy.
Beep— Beep—
Hearing the notification sound from his phone, Harumasa lifted himself up from the bed, grabbed his phone and glanced at the texts popping onto the screen.
[Image sent successfully]
[best proxy!]
Hi Harumasa! Here's today's picture.
I had a really good time today, and I hope you had fun as well.
Take care and see you next time! :)
Well, at least one of them is actually happy.
Scrolling past Wise's texts one more time as the tightening in his chest didn't bother with disappearing, Harumasa inhaled a deep breath, pressed a pillow to his chest and replied with the appropriate amount of cheerfulness.
Something something 'I had so much fun,' something something 'I can't wait for the next time we meet,'
something something a bit honest but a bit deceiving.
With another roll before Wise's response popped onto the screen, Harumasa tossed his phone aside, pressed the pillow deeper into his chest and buried some painful coughs into it.
The papers that came with the meds did warn him about this. Better at suppressing fever but may cause coughs and dryness in his throat. And since his body never worked well against the colder temperature of the night, hugging the pillow close to his chest while waiting for everything to run its course seemed to be the only thing he could do.
With another shaking breath as Harumasa slowly opened his eyes, he glanced at his arm stretched toward the window—silver moon floating in his phone as pale moonlight highlighted his fingertips—but with another hard cough erupted from his chest, he felt his body forcefully curled into a ball and clenched his hand into a fist.
Forever gripping on thin air to breathe.
However, all of this is for the sake of his health, his life, or whatever thing that sounded plausible enough to justify all of this. Taking pills and suffering their side effects afterwards—hadn't that been who he was? Who Harumasa had become ever since he escaped the buildings of taking and exploiting, and finally trained himself into someone helpful for the world?
Shouldn't he feel grateful for still having air to grip for?
With a dry laugh upon the thought, Harumasa leaned his head back, sank it deep into the pillow behind him and lay on his back. After all, breathing still counts as such as long as this body is functioning, even if said breaths tasted like flowers or wet sand or blood.
Feeling the side effects subsiding slightly, Harumasa let out a sigh, inhaled a deep breath of the blanket (tasted like expired sunlight) and stared at his own arm again.
Relaxed. Lying weightlessly just beside his phone.
They looked really happy in that picture.
Harumasa let out another laugh upon feeling the tightening in his chest disappear a little. Perhaps these new meds really do work better.
However, the exhaustion that weighed his mind still couldn't be dispelled. Even though it was normal and fortunate for him to feel tired at this time of the night, the medically-induced kinds still felt heavier than the natural ones—like the longer he lived, the less human he became.
Knowing that the sooner he fell asleep, the quicker he could wake up and distract himself with the lively sounds of the world, Harumasa buried his face deep into the blanket, ignored his fingers digging into it as though they were trying to find something to hold onto and closed his eyes.
Soft, so soft,
but never warm.