Chapter Text
It wasn't about what had happened before, I was over that. I wasn't over the fact that I would eventually get caught red handed for it. Sure, I messed up, I messed up bad, I didn't think he was this mad, now it's 10:34 pm and I'm running down the street in my clean t-shirt with my bloody boxers, I thought when he meant punishment it was gonna be like, ya know like, some 50 shades shit but naw, Tougou wants to brand me with some iron metal and I'm just not about that like honestly, I can't even deal. I don't want to feel pain, like not like that. It's inhumane and honestly I don't care what kind of pact we made before, I don't care that he told me that he loves me, I shouldn't have to go through this type of pain. Inside of me though it makes me feel like, I deserve this. I think I've done enough. I deserve this...everytime I hesitate and I think a bit, I stop a little bit. Stopping just makes it worse. I hate being so indecisive. Do I want my freedom or do I turn around?
"Osomatsu-kun, don't fight it. Turn around." Tougou says sweetly. This is my fault, he's being nice to me and waiting, he probably won't hurt me besides what he intends to do, why don't I just turn around? Why am I so scared? Something feels different... I stop in the middle of the road, and I look over at Tougou. Middle of the street, the lights gleaming from the back of him. It makes him look like a shadow, completely shrouded in the darkness of the night. I want to turn around. I really want to. I mean I love him but...I feel it in my gut. Tonight won't just end with a branding. Tonight won't just be another everything's alright I can feel it. I'm so scared I'm shaking, Tougou walks closer and closer. I just shudder. I feel no love right now. Only fear.
"Osomatsu-kun, come here." Tougou says sternly looking towards me. I get scared and turn around away from him. He walks closer. I'm so scared tears start streaming from my eyes. I don't want him to leave me alone but I really really need to leave. I feel like I do. I don't want to get hurt, I don't want...
I feel his hand on my face.
"Osomatsu." He says sternly. I start sobbing, I fall straight into his chest and grip around him. He pats my head. I sob more. I can't control myself. I hate myself. I hate what I've become. So dependent. Why was I lying. I need him. I honestly honest to god need him. I do. I was a fool.
"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry." I say letting more sobs muffle my words. I feel like such a fool. Tougou feels really warm.
"No you're not. You'll do it again and again. If left unchecked." He says to me moving my hair out of my face a little bit. I nod.
I was dumb. This is the only way. I can't make it by myself. I can't go back to my family, they won't want me after all the things that I've done. He's my world.
"Is it gonna hurt?" I look up at him with hopeful teary eyes. He nodded yes. I hid my face into his blazer. He kissed my forehead.
"But afterwards, you can go play pachinko, and drink the pain away just like you always do." Tougou says gently. I nod my head and grab his hand. I finally look him in the face. I decide to drop my fear.
"Carry me~! Like when I was a kid." I whine. Tougou shakes his head.
"Like hell I'd be seen carrying a grown ass man around. You're lucky I'm even holding your hand." Tougou says sternly.
"I love you." I say sincerely.
"I know you do." Tougou responds back.
The end.