Chapter Text
“Kids, where are you?” A voice calls from below in the dormitory.
“We’re up here Miss Himeko!” March cheers.
After a couple moments, a woman with red hair climbs up the ladder into the lab, who I presume to be Miss Himeko. Afterwards a man that must be Mr. Yang, who actually does kind of look like me, climbs up the ladder as well.
Miss Himeko glances around then says, “Good to see that everyone is doing well.” She then turns to warmly greet Rocky and I. “So, you two must be the geniuses that we have heard so much about?”
I am going to assume that ‘genius’ is supposed to be a title for them and that this is not some passive aggressive insult.
“Um, yes. Yes we are those geniuses,” I uneasily reply. “Right Rocky?”
“Yes, yes, yes. Grace is genius. Am very genius.”
“I see…” Miss Himeko then turns her attention to her crew. “May I ask, have the kids been behaving themselves while on your vessel?”
“Well…” I look over to the kids. The twins and March appear to be pleading for mercy. Dan Heng is unbothered. “I think there was some initial excitement and shock, but everything went well in the end.”
“I’m glad to-”
“Grace is lying.” Rocky interrupts. “Kids were very bad. Bad, bad, bad.”
“Traitor! I can’t believe the boulder sold us out!” Stelle points accusatorily at Rocky.
“Not a boulder, a puny rock sold us out!” Caelus huffs.
“Kids, settle down.” Mr. Yang glares at them. The twins immediately go quiet.
“In their defence, they did behave better than usual,” says Dan Heng.
If this was the twins acting at their best, I sure as heck don’t want to know what they’re like at their worst.
“Ahem, I’m sorry that the kids have been troubling you two.” Miss Himeko politely apologizes.
“No need to apologize, I’m very much used to looking after troublesome kids.” I keenly reply.
“Rocky demands retribution.” Rocky puts two of his hands together.
“Perhaps our assistance with your situation could make up for things?” Mr Yang suggests with a warm smile.
“No towing!” Rocky swivels his carapace back and forth.
“Don’t worry, Sunday informed us you didn’t want a tow. I was going to suggest assisting you with repairs to your hull. It appears you took quite a beating recently.”
“That would be a gross understatement.” I clench my teeth.
“Rocky will begin fixing hull as soon as I get access to my ship. No need for assistance.” Rocky sternly says.
I would have certainly appreciated the help, but I guess Rocky is a bit fed up and wary of what trouble these people might cause next.
“In that case, perhaps we should leave and let you get on with your research. If you are absolutely certain there is nothing you need help with?” Himeko calmly suggests.
“I mean, I think we can probably manage on our own… But before you go, I think there’s something very important we should give you.” I look over to Rocky.
“Agree. We have something very important to share,” he says.
“Oh. What is it?” Himeko asks with great interest.
“We give a breeder tank and some Astrophage and Taumoeba so you can get started on breeding suitable Taumoeba to save your home.” Rocky does his little dance.
“Hm?” Himeko gives us a confused stare.
“Grace can teach you all about Taumoeba.”
(Gee thanks for volunteering me buddy.)
“I um- I don’t think there’s any need for that…” Himeko says.
“Are you sure!?” My eyes widen. “We are more than willing to spare some Taumoeba to help you!”
“Really, there’s no need-”
“Perhaps we should just accept whatever they’re offering us?” I overhear Mr. Yang whisper in Miss Himeko’s ear.
“Hmmm… Do you think you could elaborate on what you’re offering us? We don’t quite understand.” Miss Himeko politely asks.
It appears it is time for me to teach another class. Honestly, I am a bit worn out from this whole thing but if I must-
“I think I might be able to explain things,” Dan Heng says. “The Astrophage they are referring to is an alien life form, somewhat like the swarm except on a microscopic scale. It spreads from planetary system to planetary system, absorbing energy from stars and using it to duplicate itself. Consequently, this has catastrophic effects on the local biosphere.”
“Taumoeba is also an alien life form that they have discovered in this planetary system. It is Astrophage’s natural predator and so provides a natural way to control the Astrophage population. Unfortunately, it is sensitive to certain gases and pressures, hence the need to use a breeder tank to produce a strain with the desired traits.”
“Did I get that correct?” Dan Heng looks to me for reassurance. I nod repeatedly.
Never before have I been so proud of a student.
“Ok, I think I understand. You’re offering a gift to help us deal with an Astrophage infestation.” Miss Himeko says.
“Yes, yes, yes.” Rocky tilts his carapace up and down.
“We don’t need it, but thank you for offering.”
I am speechless. Astrophage is like a disease spreading throughout the local cluster of stars. Either their star is in the early stage of infection and they don’t know about it or… Or they’re from a different unaffected region of the galaxy! It’s plausible given that they can travel faster than light however that doesn’t explain why they are at Tau Ceti. (Unless Rocky and I have become some sort of tourist attraction.)
“Hm, Dan Heng, do you think this Astrophage infestation could be as a result of Stellaron activity?” Mr. Yang asks, deep in thought.
“I can’t say for certain, but if it were the case then these two would have probably brought it up,” Dan Heng responds.
“Hold on, I’m sorry but what is a Stellaron exactly?” I ask while frantically waving my arms about.
Stelle gasps. “I can show you Mr. Teacher! Caelus help me-”
“NO!” All other members of the Astral Express (except Caelus) shout in unison.
“Why can’t Grace and Rocky observe Stellaron, question?” Rocky inquires.
“Remember when you were concerned about our engines vaporizing your ship?” Dan Hang asks.
“Of course. Rocky have good memory.”
“Well a Stellaron can vaporize a whole planetary system.”
“Bad, bad, bad.”
“Hmph, it’s a good thing then that there aren’t nearby.” I try to reassuringly smile.
The Astral Express crew then glance at Stelle and Caelus…
“Please don’t tell me…”
“Surprise Mr. Teacher!” The twins cheer.
You have got to be kidding me. This entire time those two were literal walking nuclear bombs. I bear hugged two nuclear bombs. No wonder they were acting up, I would to if I could blow up any second and annihilate an entire planetary system!
“Grace… Do all human children blow up, question?” Rocky whimpers.
I stand motionless with my mouth agape.
“Grace you are very brave for teaching kids…”
I rub my face. “So, let me get this straight. Those two have been a literal weapon of mass destruction this entire time?”
The Astral Express crew silently nod.
“Is there anyone else harbouring something dangerous within them?”
“Well March harbours a dangerous individual called Evernight.” Sunday calmly says.
March gently pats her head and makes a silly expression on her face.
I take a moment to contemplate where it all went wrong.
“Rocky would like to politely request the immediate departure of our guests,” Rocky says in a cold tone.
“Understandable,” replies Mr. Yang.
“Ok kids it’s time to leave,” says Miss Himeko who then glances at the twins. “Make sure to leave anything you found onboard behind.”
“But mom~” Stelle pleads.
“It’s- it’s fine… They can keep a souvenir…” I reply, exhausted by this whole affair.
“You’re the best Mr. Teacher!” Caelus cheers.
The Astral Express crew then gather up and, after a brief flash of light, vanish.
“Ugh, that was exhausting… But also admittedly a fun break from all the usual life or death situations we have had to deal with.” I rub my eyes and stretch my arms.
“Grace.”
“Yeah, Rocky?”
“Why there only eight breeder tanks, question?”
What- Oh you have got to be kidding me!
I quickly count only eight breeder tanks on the table. What’s worse is that it appears the first and second tanks were taken meaning we have lost our current batch of Taumoeba-06 as well as a potential batch of Taumoeba-065. Hopefully one of these other batches have survivors…
Ok, a quick look suggests they’re all dead. It’s fine. It’s not all over. It just means one thing…
“Rocky?”
“Yes Grace.”
“We need to start breeding nitrogen resistant Taumoeba right from the beginning.”
Rocky then (understandably) proceeds to go on a long and inappropriate rant about how human children are the worst and how shocking it is that not one, not two, but three human adults are inexplicably incapable of keeping a mere five kids in check.
It took a while, but eventually he calmed down. I suggested he rest and that I watch him sleep. He ordered me to just dock the Hail Mary with his ship already so he could work on things to keep himself busy.
I think it’s fair to say that Rocky’s opinion of human species as a whole has diminished quite considerably.