Chapter Text
The fox eats the rabbit. Hardly a difficult concept.
It’s even in children’s books.
One is predator, one is prey.
When Lohen is little, he wonders if that’s law.
He wonders how big a rabbit would need to grow before it could eat the fox.
•☽────✧˖°˖☆˖°˖✧────☾•
There’s a cave in the woods, not on any maps. Lohen likes to hide there when his parents aren’t looking for him. He brings a blanket from his bedroom, and a dusty lantern he found in the cellar.
It’s not homey, but his bedroom has long ceased to be home.
Home is where he can find purpose.
He leaves a market his parents dragged him to one day.
Running is far more peaceful than standing around waiting.
The river runs clear, the water still chilly in the spring.
The fish swim, tethered to the water yet still thinking themselves as free.
•☽────✧˖°˖☆˖°˖✧────☾•
Lohen is ten when he has to pull himself out of the shadows. New power lurks in his bones, explosive and deadly.
How stupid were the knights to not actually check if the children had already been experimented on? All of them were dead besides Lohen and Theadore.
Starvation was a side effect of whatever was injected into them. It ate at the already limited food they were being given too quickly.
Lohen survived with only his skin and bones. Theadore got lucky.
He finds a sword from one of the now fallen cloaked men and hides it in a tree when no one is looking. He’ll come back later.
•☽────✧˖°˖☆˖°˖✧────☾•
When Lohen submits the application papers to the Adventurers Guild, he’s read over all the rules.
There’s no age restriction for joining, only a requirement to be able to protect yourself.
He completes the trial easily, well before the time limit.
Yet still, Katheryne refuses to give him difficult commissions. She says he must reach a higher level first, so he does.
The slimes go down with a couple shots from a bow he took off another corpse.
He spends more time in his cave than at the house. It’s not his, and it’s not home.
The money he earns from the simple commissions is meager, but he buys a pillow, another blanket, and a stack of books. And a couple daggers.
•☽────✧˖°˖☆˖°˖✧────☾•
The polearm is too long for him, but he still trains with every weapon he’s acquired. Books on technique aren’t helpful, he doesn’t learn how to aim better until he’s out there shooting monsters that will kill him if he misses.
His parents stop questioning where he goes for days at a time, sometimes only stopping by once a week to grab stuff from the kitchen.
The rumors start, a relentless fighter protecting the city at night. Katheryne stops trying to hide the more difficult commissions from him.
Knights tell him not to have weapons out in public. He points out that their longswords are far more dangerous than his measly little daggers, but still puts it away until they’re out of sight.
•☽────✧˖°˖☆˖°˖✧────☾•
When Lohen falls, no one looks for him. Monsters are everywhere, and there’s no food.
A lady with white hair and pale skin tells him that the monsters are edible. He doubts it, but he sees her roast the flesh and eat it herself.
He’s hungry enough to not care.
She doesn’t share a name. He doesn’t either.
A month here is a day outside, apparently.
His powers are stronger here, but nothing compared to hers.
“This place is the origin of our power. I’ve simply had much longer to adapt.”
He’s never seen humans use more than one element. But she teaches him how to.
Apparently he’s a lot more tolerable than her last student.
She tells them fate will lead their paths. That they may cross again, or may not.
As a departing gift, she hands him a letter and a pouch of mora.
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅
He was gone for almost a week. 6 months.
The food in Mondstat is almost too flavorful now, compared to the stale flesh of abyss monsters.
The loss in power takes time to get used to.
Lohen comes clean to his parents. He tells them he’s survived without them well enough, although they don’t know quite how true that is.
•☽────✧˖°˖☆˖°˖✧────☾•
He builds up his collection of weapons with Mora earned from commissions. He still has the polearm Skirk gave him, and that is his preference to fight with. But he needs a bow for range, daggers for close quarters, and anything else he can get his hands on to train with.
For what would have been his 14th birthday, if not for the abyss, he buys himself a fancy dagger. It’s probably a stupid purchase, something more for appearance than functionality, but it is still razor sharp.
It’s shaped like a feather, notch in it designed more for looks but serving a second purpose as a way to tear through flesh, to brutalize an enemy who tries to remove it.
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅
Lohen is not 15 on records. 14 and 4 months, is what the papers say. He forges a parent signature anyways. It’s hardly like they’ll know.
Icicles and plants now hang from the roof of the cave. The contrast feels a lot like him, both predator and prey.
He comes out on top of the entrance exam. It’s not really a struggle, even though he doesn’t use his powers.
Even the twenty year olds don’t have 6 months of near constant practice.
People look at him like he has two heads when he fights dirty, switching weapons and kicking up dirt. He likes the polearm the most, and using it is instinct now.
Compared to monsters, people are easy to kill. It’s harder not to kill them than it is to kill a monster, and he has to fight back the instinctual infusion of power into his weapon.
He doesn’t have a vision. They aren’t used to that.
They’re used to the limits imposed by mortality and humanity.
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅
There are no difficult opponents anymore. None of the knights are anywhere near his level, and he rises in rank fast enough that he’s treated like a myth.
He supposes that the fact the only time people ever see him is for training or sparring doesn’t help with that, but he’s hardly going to change that.
His cave is better for sleeping than shared quarters, and his food is better than anything the canteen offers. And this way when he wakes up screaming, no one is bothered.
When he reaches the rank of Team Manager, he decides now is the time. It’s easy to steal the keys to the grandmaster’s office for a long overdue talk.
He does it at night when the shadows envelop him.
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅
When the grandmaster opens the door a few hours later, Lohen steps out of the corner. The grandmaster jumps like a scared kitten and Lohen bursts out laughing.
“Kid, I’m in my 30’s, that’s too young for a heart attack.” He says as he sits down in his chair, running a hand through his hair.
“It was concerningly easy to break into here, so maybe that’s on you for not having better guards.” Lohen suggests, and the man looks at him in shock. Probably not used to disrespect.
“Why did you break into here?”
“How else was I going to have a little chat with you? Do the paperwork and wait a few months? It’s way faster to slip in here.” Lohen sits down on the sofa, putting his feet on the cushions. He wants to see how far he can push.
“You’re dressed like a knight, but none of the knights would be brave enough to try something like this.” The man comments. “Who are you?”
“I’m a knight. But you don’t have my loyalty. I see it as unintelligent to follow someone blindly, no matter what others have seen.” Lohen explains. No one can control him. “Stupidity and incompetence are diseases, and they run deep within the knights. No one has lasted more than 3 minutes against me. And it was only one of the captains who lasted that long. Recruits are 30 seconds max.”
“Which captain did you fight?” The grandmaster asks, and Lohen snorts.
“Captain Eula. Although that was a draw, it wouldn’t have been if we used elemental power.” Lohen laughs. He wishes humans weren’t limited to one element. Fighting using all 7 is the benefit of working by himself.
“Eula?” He asks, shocked. “How old are you, kid?”
“15.”
“So you tied with one of our strongest captains at 15?”
“What’s so hard to understand about it? I’m stronger than anyone else here. Could you send me on a mission or something, I’m getting bored. I don’t even show up outside of training anymore.”
“You’re the kid everyone has been talking about.” The grandmaster finally clicks together, and Lohen grins.
“Want to spar, Varka?” Lohen says, and he laughs again at how offended the grandmaster looks. “Don’t get your panties in a twist, old man. Master is just a title reserved for the person who actually taught me.”
Varka stares at him for a moment, assessing.
“Who taught you, then? They must have been skilled.” He says, a weirdly accepting tone in his voice.
“I don’t know her name. And you wouldn’t know her, anyways. She kept me alive, so to me you’re not ‘master’.”
He hasn’t opened the letter yet. It feels like breaking the wax seal will be saying goodbye.
“Very well, Kid. You can call me Varka.”
“Unless you spar with me, I’ll call you old man.”
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅
“Until yield or first blood?” Lohen asks, holding the polearm his master gifted to him. They’ve chosen an empty field for sparring, far away from the city walls, a massive tree and statue watching them
“Yield.” Varka says, already looking at him like he’s insane.
“Boring. But fine. I’m assuming no lethal force either then?”
“You spar using lethal force?” He sounds even more shocked this time.
“Only when my opponent is good enough to dodge it.”
Varka starts uncoupling his vision.
“Don’t.”
“But you don’t have a vision. It wouldn’t be balanced.”
“I have enough tricks up my sleeves that a vision on your side is hardly going to do anything.” Lohen laughs. “Keep it on.”
“You aren’t setting yourself up for success here, kid.” Varka says, sounding tired.
“If you beat me then I’m not strong enough yet. Simple as that. Fighting with handicaps is for training and for people who’ve never fought for their life.” Lohen explains. “Besides. I don’t have any of those knightly virtues you have. I can fight as dirty as I want.”
This is the first time Lohen will use elemental energy in a fight with another person. Or at least, what is twisted to look like it.
He should probably choose an element. Multiple would raise more suspicion than power without a vision already will.
Lohen thinks about Master, thinks about the icicles hanging from his ceiling and the snow of Dragonspine off in the distance.
The abyss guides you no matter what your senses tell you. You should be able to fight without sight and hearing.
He closes his eyes so no one will see the magenta glow. And he bolts.
A sword meets his blade, and he follows instinct. Another weapon comes to meet the other side of his polearm, but he pulls out his dagger and catches the sword in the notch.
He freezes the weapons together and pulls backwards, throwing both behind him.
His opponent's heart picks up. Surprise. Good.
They’re on even ground now. One sword to one polearm.
Lohen has at least six more daggers hidden on him, but Varka hardly needs to know that.
Let him think the fight is balanced. That Lohen hasn’t honed his skills to levels a pure human couldn’t achieve.
The wind blows, messing up his hearing. Finally. Elemental energy surges in the air, at odds with the abyssal nature of his own.
Lohen stops listening. Sight doesn’t guide him.
He lets the abyss sink into his bones, powering his movement. It squirms underneath his skin and whispers in his ears. But it is power, raw and malleable.
The fight continues. They back each other into positions where no one should be able to get out, and yet find their way back to the center.
Until Lohen finds himself on the ground, Varka above him. Instinct carries his weapon as he hooks the claymore with lethal force, twisting until he can reach the hilt.
Electricity flows into the weapon and therefore Varka, causing him to drop it.
That’s no reason to end. Lohen throws his polearm aside and tosses Varka a dagger, taking one out for himself.
The close quarters force a risk. Wind is stronger like this, in such proximity. Varka can use that. He can too.
Wind swirls and he smiles, letting pyro swirl into the wind and ice protects himself. A vine returns the second dagger back to him, and he throws it again, this time with lethal force.
His own ice stops it an inch from Varka’s chest.
“Yield.” He orders, because the power is creeping into his head. Geo extends his dagger into something jagged, and he points it at Varka’s chest, right where the Abyss tells him that the man’s heart beats.
“I yield.” The grandmaster says, and Lohen grins.
“Good.” He says, letting his senses rush back over him in a storm. It takes a few seconds before he remembers to blink, before his senses switch from the fight back to everything.
My child, that fight could have been done in seconds if you had accepted.
The abyss whispers, and Lohen breathes in harshly.
You could reach power on levels you could never even imagine! Everyone would worship you as a god.
“I’d make a shit god, and you know it.” He mutters under his breath, only seeing the way Varka looks at him funny for it after.
The man has stood up, dusting off his hands on his pants.
“Forgive me for underestimating you, kid. Although I have questions.”
“Very well, then.” Lohen agrees, letting the power in him recede until he can’t feel the tingling under his skin.
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅
Back in Varka’s office, Lohen can’t help but smirk when the man drinks straight from his flask of dandelion wine. Lohen writes a note before he leaves.
Old Man,
You’re fun to spar with. Let’s do it again sometime, and don’t go easy on me like you did this time. I want to fight, not to win.
I’m not going to answer questions about my power, myself, or my master. Respect the privacy trauma deserves, don’t you think?
Don’t let your love of Barbatos’s favorite drink outweigh your self preservation! It’s just a sleep potion, no need to worry this time. Drink with one eye open.
From,
Lohen
•☽────✧˖°˖☆˖°˖✧────☾•
Today would have been his 15th birthday if not for the Abyss.
He’s heard talk about a librarian, and they’re probably the only person who can help him with this task.
He gets confused looks from the knights in the building - which considering he's only been seen in here a couple times is fair - but no one stops him as he enters. He asks where the library is, and he’s pointed to a large wooden room.
There are more books here than he’s ever seen.
He wonders if there’s anything on power like his here. He’ll have to come back.
Lohen searches among the shelves until he sees a woman in purple organizing some files.
“Are you the librarian?” He asks, and she smiles softly.
“That would be me, cutie. Do you need help finding something?” She asks, and Lohen ignores the surge of annoyance at being called cute.
“No, but I’d like help with something else.” He asks, pulling out the envelope from a pocket of his cloak. “Can you open this envelope without damaging the wax seal? Then help preserve the letter inside.” He asks. “I can pay.”
Master would probably be upset at some of her money going to something sentimental, but it’s his birthday. He deserves a gift.
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅
The Cryo vision in Lohen’s hand fills him with anger.
Why does his vision embody the Tsartisa when her people were the ones to send him down this path?
His tears crystallize before they fall.
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅
They decided to give him the promotion to Vice Captain when he turns 16, and yet he’s still invited to holiday celebrations.
The food isn’t half bad at this one, which was the only one he accepted the invitation to. He bets he was invited solely because he turned down all other invites.
It’s not like any food is bad to him after the flesh of abyss monsters.
The skewers remind him of how they ate in the abyss, meat that is somehow both bland and rotten, yet doesn’t make people like him or Skirk sick.
It’s on the rooftop of the Favonius building, the captains and their friends gathered around campfires.
Lohen is sitting on the roof, not bothering with a plate or fork as he eats. Skewers are hand food and formality is pointless.
“What are you doing out here?” A voice asks, appearing so suddenly that anyone besides Lohen would have been startled.
“I just accepted the invite because it’s normally hard to get up here at night.” Lohen says, not bothering to turn around. Just because the man is unarmed doesn’t mean they can’t be dangerous, but nothing strikes him as such.
“I don’t know who you are.” The man asks, and Lohen finally turns to see who’s behind him. He’s blonde and fairly short, a yellow star on his neck.
“Why do you need to, anyways? I’m just here on a pity invite because I didn’t go to any of the parties where I was otherwise invited.”
“Why not?”
“Training is a better use of my time than pointless small talk.” He replies. “I’m here for the stars. Not the people.”
“Do you study them, then?”
“I’m hardly a scholar. The stars just have stories.” Lohen answers, thinking about the stories Skirk (because he now knows her name) would tell him during the rare breaks from training. ‘For morale’ she would say, but Lohen thinks she just wanted to talk about it.
Tales of journeys through the stars with her own master, of what lies beyond the sky she taught him was fake.
Her master sounded much crueler than she was.
“Your power is familiar.” He says out of nowhere, and Lohen flinches. “I have no intention of telling anyone. But you can come to me if you need help with it.”
The man starts to walk away.
“How would I find you?” Lohen asks.
“Albedo. Captain of the 8th Company. I’m often away, but my assistant stays in my laboratory here most of the time. You can ask her where I am, or if you see a little girl in red running around, she probably knows as well.”
“Lohen. No one knows where I live, don’t bother asking around. The address on my file doesn’t exist.”
Albedo doesn’t trigger his fight or flight response like most do, and he wonders why. It probably has something to do with why he can tell what others can’t.
“Good to know.” Albedo says, then walks back to the rest of the party where someone immediately walks up to talk to him.
Lohen wonders what it would be like to have friends.
He’s still hungry. The abyss eats as much as he does.
Standing up, he closes his eyes and lets the abyss guide him.
He forgets to reopen them until the grandmaster is standing in front of him.
“Why are your eyes closed again? I noticed that when we fought, as well.” Varka asks, and Lohen opens then, letting the magenta swirl away as he looks Varka in the eyes.
“I told you not to ask questions.” Lohen says, uncaring of how Varka stares at his eyes. “But I’ll give you a freebie. Being able to fight without a sense is an advantage. To maintain that ability, I need to use it.
Varka nods. “Let me introduce you to everyone.”
“You aren’t asking,” Lohen points out. “You think I need friends.”
“Kid, I’ve never seen you when you aren’t fighting.” Varka sighs. “You just disappear after training.”
“I have company.” The abyss in his head and the wildlife. It’s the only company that he is willing to host.
“Do you live with your family?” Varka asks, and Lohen laughs.
“I gave you a freebie. My price for answers now starts at 5 thousand mora and will double each time.” Lohen says, and Varka looks at him like he’s crazy. He’s getting used to that expression.
“Okay. Keep your secrets, fine, I get it. You don’t want to talk about it. At least stand around the rest of us and act like you know how to socialize.” Varka sighs.
“Wow, maybe you have some bite. I thought you were just bark, considering how easy you went on me when we sparred and that I was left off the hook for drugging you.” Lohen snorts. “Fine, puppy. I’ll toss you the ball for a bit. But it’s in my field.”
“Do you have any respect for authority? At all?” Varka asks, and Lohen grins at him, all teeth.
“What do you think? Now I agreed to play your little game, but I don’t have to.”
“Fine, fine. I’ll take what I can get.” Varka agrees, leading him over to the rest of the group.
Everyone is gathered around and Lohen takes this as an opportunity to take out a dagger and spin it between his fingers. Varka glares disapprovingly.
People look at him as he approaches, and he flashes another smile. The one that makes people look at him in fear. He lets his eyes flash pink, just for a moment, just long enough they’ll be questioning if they really saw it.
“Everyone, this is Loh-”
“Wow, you really are like a puppy. I told you that I’m just playing your game, and you don’t even let me start? I might as well take my ball back.” Lohen says, ignoring the way everyone but Albedo gapes at him.
He tosses the knife to his other hand, holding it behind him as he bows. Everyone looks nervous. Good.
“Lohen, soon to be Vice Captain of the 5th company. Considering only two people here have talked to me before today, I have a pretty good guess who pitied me enough to invite me.” He turns around back to Varka. “Just because you think I’m lonely doesn’t mean you need to invite me to things. Training is a far better use of my time. If I wouldn’t normally get fired if I broke into the building to come up here, I wouldn’t have come. I’m here to look at the stars, not to entertain people.”
He walks off, delighting in the new rumors that are sure to surround him.
The wind blows the whispers towards him.
“Are you sure making him Vice Captain is a good idea?”
“Keeping him close seems smarter than letting him run off.”
“Will a title really stop him from running off?”
“It seems smart to give him something to lose.”
Lohen blends with the shadow, creeping around until he’s perched on the wall behind the grandmaster.
He leans over his shoulder, appearing with pointed teeth and magenta eyes.
“What makes you think I care about a title enough for it to keep me in check? Is a title more dangerous for me to lose than the danger of behaving is to my existence?” He hisses, smirking when Varka jumps about a foot straight up in the air.
“Barbatos! Where do you keep coming from?” Varka asks, out of breath.
Everyone is staring, even Albedo this time.
He knows he must look monstrous. Eyes swirling with pink light, teeth sharper than the ones of the maw of the abyss.
“Five thousand Mora, remember, Varka? Or can the big bad wolf be content without knowing if his sidekick is actually the enemy?”
'Only play with your prey if you need to exhaust them first.'
“Fine! Keep your secrets, but approach me like a normal person.”
“Maybe if your little pet knights had gotten there faster, I would have been a normal person.” Lohen whispers. “But your people’s incompetence to save me in time led me to power. So I’ll keep making you jump.”
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅
The rumors that surround him only grow with each day that passes towards his promotion.
People have said he’s anything from an adeptus(stupid) to a vampire(even more stupid). He's in the sun multiple times a week, so where they got the latter from is anyone’s guess.
He still spars, he still fights, and he still wins. Nothing has posed a true challenge since his spar with Eula.
You can’t gain power without challenging yourself, and he’s run out of ways to make things harder.
So when he hears about the expedition, it peaks his interest. Nod-Krai, ridden with abyssal enemies and infinite fights.
With the proximity of abyssal power, it is likely he’ll get stronger. Maybe he’ll find fights that are actually a challenge, and at least he can properly train with enemies that take more than two hits.
Today he’s training with a bow, hitting the Hilichurls from the cliff he’s standing on.
A chill appears behind him, settling in his bones comfortably. He breathes out and takes the shot. It lands dead center, the creature collapsing to the ground.
“Master.” He sighs, still not turning from his aiming. “I thought it would take longer for fate to twist our paths together again.”
“A contact of mine mentioned to me the expedition. You plan to go.” Skirk says, voice the same as he remembers it.
He nods. She’s not prey to play with like humans.
“Your body won’t tolerate the abyss as well as it used to. The abyss meshes best when your body is growing.” She explains. “It grows into you. Now that you’re older, it doesn’t have the ability to intertwine itself with your being. So it will try to find room for itself.”
“Abyssal power will escape from me.” Lohen guesses. He finally sets down his bow, turning to look at the person who saved him.
“Yes, but that will come as a side effect. Your body doesn’t have the capability anymore to handle large amounts of power without it affecting your mind.”
“The whispers,” Lohen sighs. “They’re going to get louder.”
“You will only be able to hold out so long. Think of it like a sharpened blade. You will be stronger, yes. But it is also more capable of cutting you. It takes more focus to wield than simply hacking off pieces.” Skirk explains.
“So I need to train resistance to them?”
“No. That’s not possible. You are at core a corrupted human, but the difference is you are wielding it instead of it wielding you. You are still bound by what it is.”
“Is there a solution?” Lohen asks, because he craves more power at his fingertips. But he won’t lose himself to wield it.
“Theoretically. An acquaintance of my master and the contact I mentioned earlier would have the power to do so. The problem with that is she is no longer accessible.” Skirk says.
Lohen lets her continue, curious what her solution is to needing someone unable to be contacted.
“Yet, she has a child. My contact did not share if he shares her power, but it’s the simplest option we have if he does.”
“Occam’s Razor. Got it. I’m assuming I’ll have to track him down?” Lohen questions.
“Albedo, Eighth Captain of the Knights of Favonius.” Skirk names, and Lohen blinks at her, momentarily surprised.
“Well, that works out surprisingly well. I happen to be a knight these days.” He says after a moment. She’s watching him closely, analyzing like she always seems to be.
“I know. It is not the path I expected from you.”
“I hardly am the embodiment of their ‘knightly virtues’ or the pinnacle of ‘honor,’ but adventuring got boring when even the most difficult commissions took a few days at most.” Lohen says with a snort. He’s tired of the monotony.
“Not that the fights they offer are more difficult. I’m getting a fancy title soon, but it’s meant to be a leash. You don’t seem to fancy attachments either. Snipped all your leashes already?”
“It’s best not to form them in the first place.”
“Everyone has a collar, I think. The likes of us don’t let a leash get clipped in the first place.”
Skirk looks at him, an eerie level of understanding just for a moment before it’s gone. As close to an agreement as he’ll get.
“The expedition to Nod-Krai will provide new threats. Do not use that as justification for overusing your power.”
“I mean, I’ve got this nifty little thing now as well,” Lohen says, tossing his vision in his hand. “Kind of feels like a ‘fuck you’ from the gods, honestly. But I suppose true elemental energy might come in handy.”
“It will. Now go find Albedo. Consider it training.” Skirk says, breaking open a rift. “May the stars decide your fate.”