Chapter Text
Dick thought Tim was being ridiculous. Timothy Jackson Drake was nothing if not stubborn and proud. So, he made a simple plan. Share his thoughts with the rest of the world and prove to Dick that he was in fact, right.
"So I have a theory, my brother thinks it's ridiculous. I believe he's an idiot. So I am here to prove it"
Tim pulled out a whiteboard, filled witch pictures sticking on it witch a magnet, text in multiple colours and connected with red string.
"Today I'll be explaining why I believe the Icey hair saloon doesn't belong to Cobblepot but is a strategy to frame Oz" He took in a deep breath and turned around to show the back of his hair. "Evidence one: They actually cut your hair nice. I was there yesterday to scout it out and they did a great job somehow? The cut is straight and" he turned around again to show the front. "They didn't mess up my bangs! Everyone messes up my bangs! No hair saloon connected to Cobblepot can actually be this good! Did you see his hair? He looks like a penguin!"
Tim breathed through his nose to calm himself down and pointed at pictures of his hair on the board with Cobblepots hair next to it. A red string connected them to a different picture, Oz at the opening of multiple places.
"Exhibit B, Cobblepot always attends the opening of his own business. This place is open since two months now and he didn't show up once! the only thing connecting the shop is a company called "icemen" that's owned by "future group" and their owned by "Samens" and they are owned by Cobblepot Iron! Sure that's a strong connection but Oz can't know of every shop owned by every company he owns."
With that, he pointed at another picture, this time Black Mask entering the hair saloon. "And in what world would Black Mask go somewhere owned by Cobblepot! He must've heard that it doesn't actually belong to Penguin. And you might be asking, why would Black Mask need a hair stylist? I don't fucking now! To get a hair implant or something!"
'What is Tim Drake doing on my fyp?'
'"He looks like a penguin" HE IS A PENGUIN'
'Said proof being the hair saloon actually being a hair saloon'
'Black Mask going to hair saloon is weird'
'Isn't it more worrisome that they did cut your bangs right?'
ConspiraTim: 'wait that's true…'
'omg he's gonna make a part 2 I can smell it'
'looolllllll'
84 replies
TheLastFlyingGrayson: 'go to bed Tim'
'Did their butler cut of his energy drinks????'
'Imagine skipping a board meeting at a billion dollar company and this is your reason'
'I believe the place is not owned by Penguin. I also believe Tim Drake needs sleep'
'and you guys get mad when I say Gotham is weird'
The next video was titled "Batman is afraid of Bats and I can prove it" it was over an hour long.
"Right this frame! Did you see him flinch at the bats?" Tim pointed at the screen, eyes wide open.
"He's afraid of touching Manbat!"
"Look look! See how he is staying away from the bats section in the zoo!"
There was a shot of Nightwings butt with "BUT" plastered on it somewhere in the mids of the presentation. People turned that into a sticker.
"And you won't believe the best part! What if Bat named himself after Bats so no one trace it back to him because he's afraid of bats just like…" he paused for dramatic effect and pointed at the screen just when the video of Batman at the zoo changed to a picture of Bruce Wayne.
"He's Bruce Wayne!"
Now this was pretty much another secret identity thing but Tim had also thought no one making the connection was ridiculous and wanted to give the people a nudge.
'[sticker: NWs butt with but] BUT that's just a theory- A BAT THEORY, thanks for watching'
'lolll Bruce can't even walk without tripping'
'the guy was drunk way too often to be Batman'
'Isn't Bruce dating Batman? He can't date himself'
'Maybe they bonded over their shared fear of bats?'
'But he has a point. No one saw Bruce Wayne and Batman in the same room, I'm just saying'
'isn't wayne too… stupid to be the bat?'
'Why is everyone insulting Mr. Wayne???'
'you aren't from Gotham, right?'
'sometimes I forget outsiders don't get our gossip lol'
'Dude is taking to many vacations, kids and meetings to be batman'
Tim cleared his throat, a white board behind him this time. It was flipped over to hide it's contents. "Today, I'm here to prove that people outside of Gotham get the news from inside of Gotham filtered."
He flipped the board without looking at it, something he secretly practiced for. "So a question for Gothamites leaving outside of Gotham, how many classic Brucie Wayne news did you see ever since you left Gotham? Blüd doesn't count!"
He stared at the camera like he was expecting an answer, "Exactly! ZERO! I never cared for it before but recently I was visiting a friend outside of Gotham and wanted to show him the classic Bruce Wayne video- the ice berg lounge dance show!" Tim cleared his throat, scrunching his nose in disgust. "TLDR, watching that as his ward is traumatising."
He pointed at opening screenshot of the classic Ice berg lounge dance show video hanging on the board. "I couldn't find it! Nowhere! That thing is practically part of our history classes and outside it's not available!"
He pointed at a picture of Dick next. "The word Dick doesn't get censored in Gotham or Blüd but apparently in the rest of the world it's censored? They can't use Dick Grayson online however they like!"
He traced a red string to a screenshot of a news outlet about crime rates in Gotham. "The only thing they report outside is Gotham crime rate rising- never when it drops, never when even goons started giving healthcare insurances and sure as hell not when Red Hood saved a bat stuck in a tree! They are making anti-Gotham propaganda outside of Gotham!"
'wdym they never saw THE dance show video? They showed it to us in history class!'
'[sticker: NWs butt with but] But THAT'S A THEORY, A GOTHAM THEORY, and it's probably true'
'Wait crime bosses in Gotham save bats from the trees?? How does a bat get stuck in a tree??'
'Is there a VPN so I can accesses Gotham news?'
'Imagine living a life where you can't see Bruce Wayne drunk in a cheap batman costume'
folded comments »
'Dick'
'Dick Grayson'
'Dick'
TheLastFlyingGrayson: 'Dick'
'Dick'
54 replies
'Dick'
'Dick'
'Dick Grayson'
'Wdym Dick is censored'
Tim started the video, looking as tired as a single mom with three kids and four job, this time standing outside. In Smallvile. "Alright, today I'm here to take a plant from a friends farm and attempt to make it grow in Robinson park to prove that Gotham soil isn't at fault"
He then proceeded to hold up a small tree, the roots wrapped up to protect them. "Let's go to Robinson park"
On the next cut, he was on a private jet. "I know this isn't our usual conspiracy theory but I wanted to have an even more solid proof for this one because I'm so sure there's nothing wrong with the Gotham soil"
The scene changed to Tim planting the tree somewhere in Robinson park. "Okay, I'll do it's proper care like I've been instructed by my friend." A fast clip of Tim taking care of the tree ran across before it stoped with Tim standing behind the Tree. "I'll put pictures of every week with me standing next to it for height comparison and this better work- I bet 10 bucks for this to Dick"
In the montage, the tree was in fact growing. Tim didn't end the video himself, it just was a black screen with white text on it, saying "Suck it, Grayson"
'I mean, Ivy is doing her thing'
'Never in my life did I imagine that 2 nepo babies would bet with 10 dollars lolll'
'Who even is this guy? I saw him in Metropolis and everyone treats him like a celebrity'
'Imagine not knowing THE Tim Drake'
'Are we deadass?'
'lol That's the 17 y/o ceo of Wayne Enterprises.'
'wait Timmy isn't known outside of Gotham? My guy carries WE'
'The Filtered Internet Theory… Tim was right'
'imagine being do petty you fly around with a private jet and take care of a plant for weeks to best your bro'
'and the 10 bucks'
'I thought metropolis plants would be too weak for Gotham weather?'
The video opened with Tim standing in front of the whiteboard again, hair dishevelled and eyebags looking like they could replace middleschoolers backpacks. "I-" a long breath intake- "can prove that Edward Nygma did play Riddler in 'The Riddlers Question'. I KNOW IT"
Tim flips over the whiteboard, no practice needed this time. It showed two pictures next to each other, the Riddlers butt next to the movie Riddlers butt. "THE BUTTS MATCH PERFECTLY AND NO ONE CAN REPLICATE EDWARD NYGMAS STYLE- MAN KNOWS HOW TO DRESS"
That was it.
'[sticker: Bruce Wayne and Batmans butts next to each other with "they match"] the true Gothamite way to prove someone's identity: The Butts'
'He needs sleep'
'But he's right-'
'The butts are important gng'
'no one. and absolutely no one can replicate Riddlers clothes, he has to have been a part of this'
'imagine ur identity getting leaked by ur Butt, couldn't be me'
In this video, Tim looked more put together, standing in front of his trusted whiteboard. "Now, we all know and love RedFood, the guy who eats, rants and rates. But I have reasons to believe he's the Red Hood. And it's not matching Butts this time. I mean they do as a bonus point, but I have more to back it up."
A dramatic flip of the whiteboard revealed another theory board. "One- every time Hood gets an injury, Food disappears for while." He pointed at a piece of news paper about Red Hood getting injured. "Two! The chests match! look at this!"
The close up of two chests filled the screen, one with the red bat symbol and the other a screenshot from the RedFood channel. Then two new pictures showed up. With the Butts. "and the BUTTS MATCH"
Tim cleared his throat. "Anyway, there's also the fact that this scar-" a picture of RedFoods wrist showed up on the screen. "matches the scar Hood sustained during his fight with Robin on march 24th, at the Docks. The timeline of the video matches the dat as well."
He followed a sting on the board to a picture of Red Hood sitting on a rooftop with a Batburgers bag. "And, Hood eats Robin Nuggets, Ivy Salad, Two-Face sandwich, a Batshake and the Harley Cake. A list we all know RedFood loovvvesss!" He threw his hands up dramatically, pointing at the photo with a finger and yelling, "Coincidence? I DON' THINK SO!" before the video ends.
'If the Butt matches'
'Dude needs sleep'
'Is this Gotham Influencer drama?'
'kindaaaa'
'maybe??? One sided beef at best, Food doens't care much'
'all of this and he misses the glaring REDF/HOOD'
'The funniest part is, he's already rich. He's doing this for the love of the game'
RedFood:'My butt is obviously rounder'
ConspiraTim: 'I KNOW IT'S U'
'YOOO FOOD'
'The Butts match Food, u can't deny it'
84 replies
'I thought everyone had noticed that their the same person???'
'I'm new here, is this normal?'
'yeah'
'pretty much'
'define normal'
'yes lol'
'normal'
'imagine Food making a video about this being true'
'[sticker: Tim pointing at the RedHood eating photo with "coincidence? I don't think so"] new Timmy sticker unlocked'
'[sticker: RedFood dropping his burger] They're so chaotic'
'Why in the world do you have Foods fave Batburger order memoriesed?'
'so Food and Hood being the same person isn't common knowledge?'
'do u have proof?'