Chapter Text
I will never be a brave man. I don’t care what people say about believing in me, I know my limits, and I know that I will never be brave, no matter the circumstance, I will always choose my own comfort and safety above all. I know it’s terrible, but it’s who I am, and it's who I will always be, and I’m alright with that.
I wake up on an unfamiliar bed, surrounded by unfamiliar sounds. Something was beeping, maybe an alarm? I tried to roll over to turn it off, but that’s when I noticed the machines. There was an oxygen mask on my face, an IV in one arm and bandages on the other- had something happened to me while I was asleep? Upon closer inspection, the bandages looked too loose on my arm, as though they’d been wrapped around an arm much larger than my own. What the heck was going on?
I didn’t know what was up with all the medical stuff, I felt fine, I couldn’t see any injuries on my bandaged arm, and the IV had been removed by… something, while I had been observing my bandaged arm.
Where were all the people?
If I was in a medical ward then surely there would be, oh i don’t know, medics? I couldn't hear anyone talking, the only noise was that pesky alarm. Also, why was I smelling ammonia? It was very faint, sure, but distinct. Was that safe?
Was I safe?
Now that I was sat up, I took the opportunity to properly assess my surroundings, the room was oddly shaped, and looked like it’d been tossed around and shaken up by something huge, there was stuff strewn everywhere, it looked like some of it had left small dents in the walls, had there been an earthquake? But how would that work on a boat? Maybe we’d encountered a sea monster, if that was the case then I’m sorry I didn’t remember it.
I tried to stand up, it felt very, very wrong, like gravity had increased somehow, and the world was upside down.
Then I saw the rock.
It was in some kind of glass tunnel, just lying there, as rocks do. Why was there a rock in here? Oh well, the rest of my world had kind of been turned upside- down (pun intended, ha), so the random rock wasn’t really that weird in comparison.
First order of business- find the people.
“Hello? Is anyone there? Where is everyone?”
I jumped when a monotone female voice replied from all around me, it didn’t sound like a real person.
“Dr. Ryland Grace, end of manifest.”
What did that mean? Was I the only person here? The voice sounded like it had replied to my question, so I might as well ask it more.
“Uh, where am I?
“You are currently aboard the Hail Mary, distance from Tau Ceti-”
What
The
Fuck
???
I must be dreaming, that was it- I was stressed and my brain was making stuff up based on what I was stressed about! That didn’t explain the rock though, I thought I’d call it Rocky, because it’s a rock.
I was definitely going crazy.
Well I might as well explore a bit while I was here, I’d always liked lucid dreams, even if I’d only ever experienced them once or twice in my life.
The ship had definitely been through something big, I climbed down a ladder to the room below, which was also upside down and looked like a lab. I explored a bit more and paused when I saw a viewing area that was like a window, I approached it curiously and paused when the view registered. Space was big, it looked like the night sky on earth, but it was different knowing I was in it, and not just looking up. The stars were sprinkled everywhere, twinkling in my direction like diamonds. It was cliche, but so true, it was absolutely gorgeous. What really caught my eye, though, was the sliver of a planet I could see- the atmosphere was a rich shade of teal and orange that completely blocked out any view of the surface, it was breathtaking.
I didn’t know how my imagination had created this, but I was happy that it had, I could watch this view for hours, so I did.
It never really lost its novelty, looking out at the vast void of space, I wondered what the planet was called, but then I realised that I’d made it up, so I could name it!
Hmm, I didn’t know much about Roman mythology, but thanks to a phase when I was a teenager, I still had a fair few facts about the Greek gods knocking about in my brain somewhere. Maybe I should name it after my favourite goddess, Hestia. That sounded good, and it definitely suited the slightly ethereal look of the planet.
I stared at Hestia for a little while more, until I got curious about the rest of the ship and decided to continue my exploration.
I found the control room and WOW was it messed up! A chair was broken and leaning at an angle that it probably shouldn’t be, the screen in front of it was cracked and covered in blood, that was very ominous, I wondered what had happened here and why this would be in my dream, there was probably some deep meaning to this in a horoscope book somewhere. The weird glass tunnels continued in there as well, but it was shattered, like something had broken through it, my thoughts went back to the weird rock back up the ladder.
This dream was a little too real for my liking, the level of detail was something I’d never experienced before, but no other option made any sense! It wasn’t like time travel was real, right?
Right?
But why would I possibly be on the Hail Mary, why not one of the actual science officers, why not Martin or Anne? And why were none of the rest of the crew here? This had to be a dream.
I climbed back up to the dormitory, sitting on the floor to stare at the rock for a bit. It seemed to be sitting inside of an airlock and was very oddly shaped, it had several things attached to it that looked kind of like arms, or maybe legs? Either way, this rock had limbs and that was creepy, rocks don’t have limbs!
I felt my eyelids grow heavy as I watched it, a yawn creeping up on me. Time didn’t really seem like a thing here, but I was getting pretty tired, so I clambered back into the bed and fell asleep, slightly disappointed that the dream was going to be over.
Except that it wasn’t over.
I was still on the ship when I woke up, the rock was still in the airlock, and I was still confused. Surely I should have woken up back on the vat? Unless this was a really weird dream where I dreamed about sleeping?
There wasn’t much for me to do on the Hail Mary other than look at Hestia and watch the Rock, it still looked ominously like it had limbs. I didn’t want to mess with any controls, they all looked so complicated, and the blood on the broken screen gave the control room a really bad vibe.
Days might have passed and I was starting to get annoyed with this dream, when was it going to end?! Was it even a dream?! I was going crazy!
I was just settling down for another night's sleep when I heard an ominous tap.
Tap.
Tap.
It seemed to be coming from the glass airlock, I launched myself backward when I saw what it was- the rock was moving.
GOOD LORD, IT’S ALIVE!!!
It was tapping weakly, along with a strange musical sound that seemed to be coming from within it, I scrambled backward and hid behind the first thing I saw. What was happening, why was it alive? It’s a rock! Rocks aren’t alive!!
I tried to slowly move away, but it must’ve seen me because the musical noises grew louder, almost frantic, but then they grew weaker and subsided. I managed to make it to the lab, surely it wouldn’t be able to follow me there, especially if it was locked in the airlock.
I paced around the lab trying to decide what the heck I should do about this, there was a weird rock…spider…thing in the dormitory and it knew I was here. I didn’t like this dream!
I could just camp out in the lab until it ended and I woke up? That could work. But something about the creature felt off, its movements had been weak, as had its sounds- it looked injured. I thought back to the state of the ship and the broken glass tunnel in the control room, if it was hurt then I should try to look after it, right? Unless this was a trap and it was going to kill me as soon as I got close enough to try and help? It was definitely an alien, I’d gathered that much by now, and I’d watched enough sci-fi movies to know how these things went.
It still felt wrong to just leave it, though.
I placed a foot on the ladder, was I really doing this?
Yes I was.
I pulled myself up the ladder, preparing myself for what I would see. The rock- I remembered that on my first day here, I’d named it Rocky- still hadn’t moved, but it started making sound again as soon as I emerged, louder than before, but still weak. I gingerly walked up to it, crouching down in front of the airlock it was in.
“Are you hurt?”
It shifted around a bit, but still didn’t really move, making another musical sound that must’ve been an answer to my question.
“I’m not really sure I understand what you’re saying,”
Rocky let out a string of notes that sounded slightly quizzical.
“Can you understand me? Uhh, tap once for yes, twice for no?”
Tap.
So that was a yes, it can understand what I’m saying.
“Are you hurt?”
Tap.
“Is it something to do with whatever happened down there?” I gestured vaguely toward the control room.
Tap.
“I’m dreaming, aren’t I?”
Tap. Tap.
No? To be honest, I’d kind of given up hope that this was a dream a long time ago, dreams just didn’t last this long, nor did they have this kind of slow pace and continuity. I was actually in the future, aboard the actual Hail Mary, faced with an actual alien.
“Am I meant to be able to understand you?”
Tap.
“I don’t know what’s happening,” I admitted, “I just woke up here and it was so weird- I thought it was a dream, but apparently it’s not.”
Tap. It agreed with me.
“There should be at least one other human here, it doesn’t make any sense!”
Tap. Tap.
It disagreed with something I’d said?
“What, it makes sense that I’m the only human here?”
Tap.
“Did…something happen to the others?”
Tap.
“Was it during…” I gestured vaguely at the room around me, hoping it would understand what I meant.”
Tap. Tap.
I thought about Yao and Ilyukhina, what had happened to them? What was going to happen to them, in my time?
I fell silent, leaning against the weird material of the airlock.
“If this is real, then that means I’ve traveled in time. That makes no sense, but neither does a rock- spider- alien, no offence.”
Tap.
“Yes? Yes offence?”
Tap.
“Oh, I’m sorry.”
Tap. There was a chitter that sounded like a laugh, it clearly must be used to us talking like this.
“Wait, was that sarcasm?”
Tap.
“So I’m guessing we know each other well? In the future? If you’re joking around?”
Tap. Another laugh.
I was starting to like this alien, we were communicating pretty well already, even if it wasn’t the best method for discerning sarcasm.
“Wait, did future- past- me have a way to actually talk to you? Like, a software or something?”
Tap.
“Is it somewhere around here?”
Tap.
I looked around and saw a laptop, I pointed it out, “On that?”
Tap.
I grabbed it and returned to where I’d been sat before, opening the laptop to try and find the program that future- past- me had made, I tried to ask Rocky for help finding it, but it just kept saying no. Suit yourself.
Even without its help, I managed to find the program, giving a thumbs up once it was on the screen. I heard that musical voice, and watched the words appear.
<Why Grace no remember, question?>
<Why Grace no injure, question?>
<Grace say Grace from past.>
“Yeah, I don’t know any more than you do, I just kind of woke up here,” I shrugged, “Why are you hurt, what happened?”
<Grace Rocky fishing for predator in Adrian atmosphere, fuel migrate, ship spin, excess gravity. Rocky broke out of tunnels to help Grace, oxygen set Rocky on fire, no remember after that. Woke up, you here, not my Grace.>
There was a lot in there, first, I’d named the alien Rocky twice, some things never change. Second, what was Adrian, was that what we’d called the planet? I still preferred Hestia.
“I know I’m not your Grace, he’ll probably be back soon, and I can go home.”
<Should give past Grace different name, is confusing to talk about past Grace and my Grace as same but different people.>
“Yeah, I guess. Well, you call future- me Grace, that’s just my last name. How about you call me Ryland?”
<Understand, Eridian word for past- Grace is ‘🎶 🎵’>
The screen showed <unknown> at the new note, so I inputted my name.
<Thank, will be much less confusion if this happens again.>
“I hope it doesn’t happen again.”
<Rocky hope same, miss Grace, Ryland not same, no offence.>
“None taken.”
The silence that fell was comfortable, at least. I had about a million other questions for Rocky, he’d called himself an Eridian, was that what I’d called his race? The name didn’t mean much to me, I guessed it was something to do with his star, but names of stars had never been my forte- the only one that really mattered to the project was Tau Ceti.
I wondered what Eva would think of all this, I doubted that she’d believe me, but I couldn’t imagine what she’d do if she did, would she want to know about Rocky? I barely knew anything about him!
I just wanted to go home.