Chapter Text
Once upon a time, May Parker used to be under the childish illusion that her life was always destined for normality.
Not that she wanted to be the poster child for all things ordinary, but she didn’t particularly dislike it either. It just… was.
She had an ordinary childhood, ordinary job, ordinary friends, and an ordinary husband. And she loved it all, especially Ben.
But then her nephew stayed the weekend, and his parents never came home.
Nothing about him has ever been ordinary, and she loved him dearest.
May loved him so much that he was the only thing that kept her from letting the grief from extinguishing her into nothingness when Ben died.
The world around them seemed to burst with oddities, until even gods, aliens, and superheroes became the new ordinary.
May never would have thought her nephew would fall into that category. But he did, and she loved him all the more for it, even if it put her stomach in knots and had her hair going gray.
But even with the terror and fury she felt when she found out that the Spider-Guy who’s been catching crashing cars by hand and stopping psychopaths in the sky, was actually her fifteen-year-old nephew, she still felt so much damn pride.
Don’t get her wrong, she still desperately wanted to wring the neck of that billionaire ‘mentor’ of his and lock Peter up in his room for the rest of eternity, but still. She couldn’t be prouder.
Out of all the oddities in their lives, Tony Stark was… certainly one of them.
A man who went from a nuisance, to a friend, and finally to a borderline co-parent. All with neither of them even trying, it just… happened. As if it was the most natural progression in the world.
Tony Stark went from being a celebrity as untouchable as the Kardashians, to a family member she hung out with almost every Sunday over ice cream and a bottle of wine. Someone who Peter hung around every week, the closest thing that boy has had to a father since losing Ben.
Someone who had held onto their apartment even when they were nothing but dust, and had almost died bringing them back.
So, when May Parker opened her front door and saw Tony Stark sitting at her kitchen table with her nephew, she didn’t bat an eye.
What she did bat an eye at, was the puffy red of Peter’s eyes and tenseness in Tony’s shoulders.
Something happened. And with these two, that could be anything between “the coffee maker broke” to “a supervillain kicked my ass and a billion people died”, so to say that she was instantly on edge would be an understatement.
Especially when Peter’s puffy eyes met hers, widening a fraction as his voice shook of its own accord. “May,”
May dropped her purse to the floor, making her way to him. “Peter? Baby, what happened?”
Peter stood from his chair, and rushed into her arms. It didn’t escape her notice when Tony reached out with a softly spoken “Kid, don’t-“, trying to stop him. Why he would do that, she couldn’t figure out. But May’s bigger concern was her kid, who had his arms wrapped around her, chin resting on her shoulder as he tried to steady shaky breaths.
“Oh god,” May couldn’t stop herself from breathing, already having to stop her hands from trembling as she held her nephew. “Peter, what happened? What’s wrong? Stark, little help here?”
She glanced up at the man from over her kid’s shoulder, who only regarded her with cold eyes, mouth set in a hard line. The fingers of his flesh hand kept twitching, the metal ones still as stone.
What crawled up his metal ass?
“Nothing happened.” Peter assured her, which didn’t exactly feel too reassuring, but at least she could breathe again. “Nothing, um… recently, at least. But it’s, uh…” he gave an almost delirious sounding laugh, not exactly the kind you hear after a good joke. “It’s been a really weird day.”
“One word for it.” Tony muttered, metal forefinger now tapping against the table.
“Weirder than learning you can climb walls and have a Peter Tingle?” May tried to joke, but it seemed to fall on deaf ears.
“You love me, right?”
If Peter didn’t have her attention before, he certainly did now, with the most ridiculously obvious question he has ever asked.
“Of course, Peter. More than all the larb in the world.” May moved her arms up, cupping his face on both sides and pulling him away to look in his eyes, which couldn’t seem to meet hers. “Seriously, Pete, of course I do. Talk to me, sweetheart, what’s going on?”
Peter opened his mouth, then closed it, glancing towards his mentor, who looked like he was about ready to have a coronary.
“Yeah, okay, that’s it.” Tony stood up, pocketing his phone which he had just been typing on. “Kid, me and aunty here are gonna have a talk. Happy’s pulling the car around, you’re staying at the tower tonight.”
“Excuse me?” May said at the same time Peter stuttered, “Mr— Tony, hold on a minute, you don’t have to-“
“Yeah, actually, I do.” Tony said, voice hard and almost deadly as he stared her down. “Because I plan on finding out exactly what happened to my kid, and why.”
“Aunt May didn’t have anything to do with this.” Peter said, stubborn and resolute, apparently in on this secret conversation she was completely out of the loop of.
“Peter-“
“She didn’t, Tony! May’s not a criminal, she raised me—“
“Which should have been my job!” there was something raw and wounded in those words that sounded an awful lot like grief, and she would know. But she was more confused than anything.
Tony’s hands metal and flesh alike curled in fists at his sides. “A job that was taken away from me, and taken away from you, and I plan on finding out why. But until then, you are staying at the tower, safe, no questions asked. And if Mrs. Parker is innocent, then mazel tov to us all! But if not…”
“Innocent of what, exactly?”
Again, she went ignored as Peter butted in. “You’re not having this conversation without me. This is my life.”
“Which is why I have to protect it, protect you—“
“I don’t need you to—“
“HEY!” May snapped, both heroes whipping their heads towards her. “Someone tell me what’s going on right now, or I’m gonna start screaming.”
“That’s what I feel like doing.” Tony muttered, running the flesh hand over his face, breathing deeply. “This is a conversation I really don’t want Peter hearing.”
“I’m not a four year old kid anymore!” Peter snapped, making the man flinch. “You don’t have to—“
“It’s okay,” May cut in, putting a hand on her nephew’s shoulder. “Peter honey, it’s okay, go meet Happy downstairs.”
“May, no, you don’t understand what he thinks-“
“Well I’m sure I’ll figure it out.” With the anger that seemed to appear out of thin air, May didn’t want Peter hearing this conversation, either. Whatever it was. “But you’re not staying at the tower tonight.”
“Yes, he is.” Tony said, as if it was set in stone.
“No, he’s not. What he’s going to do is go out and get some takeout or something.” She eyed the mostly empty pizza boxes. “Or dessert.”
Peter crossed his arms, looking between the two of them, brows furrowed. Eventually he sighed, sounding as if he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. He rubbed at his temples, muttering to himself. “Okay, okay…”
Peter took a long, deep breath, leveling Tony with a loaded look. “Don’t be hard on her, I know that she didn’t know.”
Tony didn’t say anything, just watched as their kid reluctantly made his way to the door, slamming it behind him. They waited until Happy texted that the kid was with him, then Tony leveled her with a look that could kill lesser men. “Did you know?”
If there was a special place in Hell for angry women who strangled disabled superheroes, she might just book a one-way ticket down there.
“In case you haven’t noticed, I’m not a mind reader, Stark.” May adjusted her glasses with a frustrated huff, arms crossing. “So I’d really appreciate being clued in on what I’m being accused of.”
“Fine, you wanna be clued in?” Tony practically snarled, teeth clenched and eyes wild as his flesh hand squeezed the top of his chair, knuckles white. “Let’s cut the bullshit, then.”
•••••••••••••••
It seemed like today was a day for high emotion. Tony’s current status? Rage.
Rage, as he stared at May Parker’s self righteous irritation. Rage, as he stared at the woman who might have had a hand in stealing his son’s childhood from him.
When Tony felt this particular flavor of rage, things usually tended to get blown up.
He clenched his metal hand, half afraid a repulser will go off, half hoping it would.
He swallowed, trying to reel himself in.
He’s had fantasies, about what he would do to the people who took his baby. Fantasies that would end in blood and prison time that he might not even bother to buy himself out of. And if May Parker, someone who had wiggled her way into his small makeshift family without even trying, had been the one who took his son away…
Peter would never forgive you.
That one thought kept his fist clenched and the red in his vision from clouding everything completely. For better or worse, his son loved this woman, probably more than he’ll ever love his own father. And that’s something he will have to live with.
But that doesn’t mean he’ll ever forgive her. Pretty much the opposite, actually.
That’s if she knows. She might not. She’s not the one who had him first after you.
Which would mean the blame possibly lies with her in-laws, who were as dead as he thought his son was. And he will never get to look them in the eye and ask fucking why.
Why did they take away his baby, his light, whose absence left him stumbling through the darkness. Why did they have to cut him open and hollow out everything worth taking.
Why did he have to grieve for someone he never should have had to grieve for?
At this point, he’s not sure what option he’s rooting for. But for now, he’ll have to figure out which one is the truth.
Which is why Tony looked May Parker straight in the eye, and asked a question that burned his stomach like acid. “Did you know that Peter’s my son?”
May blinked at him, without fear or horror or contrition, just plain old confusion. “… you may wanna run that by me again, more specific words this time.”
“Don’t bullshit me, Parker!” Tony slammed his flesh hand against the table and, to her credit, she didn’t flinch, but her eyes widened a fraction. “Tell me, May… what do you know about Lukas Stark?”
It was roughly the same question he’d asked the kid, but with a vastly different meaning behind it.
He did see recognition spark in her eyes with the name, but that was hardly a surprise. It’s harder to find someone from their generation who hasn’t heard of the kidnapping case of the decade.
May’s brows furrowed, and there was the smallest hint of pity in her gaze.
Not once has he mentioned his missing kid to her, and not once did he plan to until today. Luke was a topic that most people in his inner circle knew to avoid, unless it was on birthdays and the occasional holiday, since the patented Stark Spirals were inevitable anyway.
“I know what the media knows.” May replied, head lightly shaking. “But I don’t know what he has to do with Peter. I don’t…”
There it was, a slight twitch in her eye. A sudden shift in the way she looked at him, with just a little bit of dread creeping in. May took a small step back, fingernails digging into her arm.
She knows something.
He doesn’t know what she knows, but she knows something.
The repulser tried to heat in Tony’s closed fist, and he had to force it to cool.
May’s voice only trembled for a moment, but it still trembled. “What does he have to do with Peter?”
“Everything.” Tony gave a choked laugh, the sheer insanity of the situation weighing on him. It was a day plucked straight from a soap opera. “Because he’s him. Peter is Lukas, Lukas is Peter, all one and the same. My protege and favorite lab buddy, is actually my long lost son! Who’d have thunk it, huh? Did you thunk it? Cause that’s kinda why we’re here.”
“Tell me this is a joke.”
“You see me laughing?”
“No fucking way.” Her head shook fast and hard, taking another step back, eyes wide. “I don’t believe you, no way, no. I want a blood test, right fucking now. There is no way that my nephew is your son, and how fucking dare you for making him think—“
“How dare I?” Tony laughed, all sharpness and no humor. “I knew you had balls when you tried to punch me after finding out about the kid’s spider side gig, but my god—“
“That boy lost his parents, Tony! And an uncle who raised him, so that’s two fathers, and he nearly lost you just a few months ago. I don’t care how bad you’re grieving your son, but you don’t get to make mine think that—“
“You want proof? Here’s your goddamn proof.” Tony tapped on his watch before holding his hand out. “FRIDAY, bring out Spidey’s test results from earlier today.”
“On it, Boss.”
A hologram burst to life from his watch, clearly showing the results from the test comparing Peter’s DNA to Luke’s, exactly same as before. When you looked beyond the changes made by the bug bite from Hell, it was the same kid, no doubts about it. Tony’s forte might not be genetics, but he knows enough to know it’s true just by looking at it.
May, he’s not so sure, who was staring intently with a frown. But she seemed to get the gist. “This is Peter’s DNA?”
“The one and only. Well, at least in this universe, if Strange can be trusted after a bottle of the good stuff from Old Asgard.” That had been a weird after party a week after they defeated Thanos and knew that Tony probably wasn’t gonna die. Thor had even brought the good stuff he was saving for a special occasion. Couldn’t get more special than saving the world… unless you made a career out of it, then it tends to get a little stale.
May blinked, shifting foot to foot, head shaking. “This can’t… this isn’t possible.”
“Then how do you explain it being real?”
“No, no, no, no…” May shook her head, glasses starting to slide down her nose. “It’s wrong, it has to be wrong, your robot’s wrong.”
FRIDAY didn’t seem to like that slander, and sounded almost snippy. “When the data is this clear, I’m not usually wrong, Mrs. Parker.”
“I want someone else to do a test, a third party who doesn’t have anything to do with this.” May insisted, beginning to pace a short distance back and forth.
Tony huffed, eyes rolling. “Sure, let’s do that. Like some random doctor is going to be more knowledgeable than one of the smartest AIs in existence.”
“Thank you, Boss.”
“‘Course, Baby Girl.”
“Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god,” May breathed, looking like she was one revelation away from hyperventilating.
Tony slumped back down in his chair, suddenly exhausted by it all. “Seriously, May… did you know?”
“OF COURSE NOT!” May shrieked, eyes wide and wild as she whirled on him. “I didn’t— this isn’t— oh my god.”
She practically collapsed in Peter’s abandoned chair, taking shaky breaths as she covered her face in her hands, elbows on the table. “Oh my god.”
“Come on,” his voice took a desperate edge, his anger cooling until there wasn’t much else besides exhaustion. He knew the anger, the rage would be back full throttle, but for now… it was like for the first time in years a weight has been lifted off his shoulders, and he could finally breathe. And the whole emotional rollercoaster practically gave him jet leg. “You had to have known something. Kids don’t just suddenly materialize in families.”
“I know they don’t. I…” May was quiet for a long minute, hands lowering until only her eyes were visible, even though they refused to meet his own. “We… Richard and Mary said that Peter was theirs. You- you have to understand that Richard and Ben weren’t really that close, and Richard, pardon the pun, could be a real dick. So, when they showed up one day, telling us that they had a son they never told us about… it was insane, but not out of the realm of possibility.”
“Seriously? You bought that?”
“It was easier to believe than that they’d kidnapped a billionaire weapons dealer’s child! I mean,” May shook her head to the point that her glasses did fall off, clanking onto the table. She dropped her hands, head still shaking. “Our running theory was that one of them kept a secret child from the other, who they got custody of somehow, and just tried to save face. But all of Peter’s papers never suggested anything other than what they said.”
“Right,” there was a spark of anger again. “Because something as absolute as paper can never be faked.”
“We didn’t think… right after we found out about Peter, Richard and Mary died and so we… we had bigger problems, and Ben was grieving, and we suddenly had a kid to take care of and a tiny apartment and not enough money…” May raised a hand to cover her forehead, eyes squeezing shut. “It was a big fucking mess. But… but by the time things calmed down, we loved Peter so much, he was ours, so we didn’t…”
“Didn’t look into it.” Tony bit his inner cheek, huffing. “And I lost out on my kid’s childhood.”
“I’m sorry.” May drew a shaky breath, still not looking him in the eye. “I didn’t know, Tony. I swear to god I didn’t know that he was… that he was him.”
“Yeah, well…” He stood from the chair, slowly pushing it back into place. “I’ve been lied to enough times to not take anything at face value anymore.”
Obadiah’s hands digging into his chest came to mind, pulling away the only thing that kept his heart beating. And Steve’s shield, barreling down towards his face, only to hit a few inches down instead.
He wondered if May’s face, right here and now, will be another ghost in his mind. Another person he lets into his heart, only to have them dig it out with pliers.
He hoped not, for his baby’s sake more than his, but… also for his, too. Because this hurricane of a woman is probably the closest thing he’s ever had to a sister, and this gut punch was going to sting for a long while.
If Steve Rogers has taught Tony anything, is that he had the capacity for forgiveness when the chip’s were down. But this? This was something he will never, ever forgive. Even if Thanos dug himself out of his proverbial grave and May Parker was the universe’s last hope.
It was too much, too fast, and his heart was still playing catch up.
“One way or another, I’m going to find out what happened to my son.” Tony looked her in the eye, and this time, she looked back. “But until then, he stays with me.”
“No,” May shook her head. “He’s my baby, you can’t take him.”
“He was my baby first.” Tony’s hand, the real one, trembled, and he kept stopping himself from squeezing it with the other. “And I’m not losing any more time.”
“Tony, please, you can’t just—“
“Uh, yeah, actually I can just.” With that, Tony made his way to the door, slamming it behind him.
••••••••••••••••
Peter couldn’t believe any of this was happening.
This morning he woke up, and everything was fine, everything was normal. His name was Peter Parker, his parents were named Richard and Mary, and his past before the spider bite was as ordinary as they came.
But then it’s as if he blinks, and and he’s the focal point of one of the most famous kidnapping cases from the last couple decades, his mentor is his father, and his parents might be his kidnappers. And those were just the highlights.
This is so freaking weird.
Peter leaned his head back against the seat, eyes squeezing shut. His leg kept bouncing of its own accord, feeling like he’ll crawl out of his own skin if he doesn’t move somehow.
His mind kept retreading every memory he had of Tony Stark, a man he’s idolized since he first picked up a book he’d written about string theory from a rummage sale. And someone he’s seen as a hero since he saved him at the Expo Center.
A man who took down terrorists and aliens and evil robots for a day job. A man who saved the freaking world, time and time again.
… a man who would sit with him after catching him in the kitchen after a nightmare or rough patrol. A man who held onto Peter’s apartment and Peter’s things for five years, not knowing if he’d ever come back. A man who opened his home and his lab and his heart to a random kid from Queens, and never expected anything in return.
A man who loved him like a son long before knowing that’s what he was.
Peter almost felt woozy from it all, like every aspect from his life, true and false, won’t stop spinning around him and convoluting everything he’s ever known.
Nothing makes sense and nothing feels like it’ll ever make sense again, except… for one thing.
That’s why he’s so familiar.
It’s the one thing that makes sense. The one question that’s been answered without replacing it with a million more. The one thing he knows deep in his gut to be true.
That was the conclusion he’d came to while ruminating in his room right after having Mr. Stark’s bomb implode his life. A lightbulb that burned so bright it burst. It was what had gotten him out of that room, and into Tony’s arms.
His father’s arms.
The same arms he remembered holding him as his father said goodbye before his trip. The same arms that reached around him for the door in a mistaken hug, the first offense of that weird familiar feeling, a sudden urge to hug a guy he barely knew that led to nothing but awkwardness.
The same arms that held Peter as his body faded, atom by atom. His entire being tearing apart as his body tried to heal it back together, over and over, buying him nothing but extra seconds and agony. And a sudden knowledge that this, this is what Tony had been talking about after the ferry. The fear that Peter’s death would be on him.
He wondered if Tony thought about that day, knowing what he does now. He wondered if he thought of any of the days differently.
“So, kid,” Happy said, not usually the one to strike up conversation, which is probably why it jolted him from his thoughts so roughly. “How’s your aunt been doing? Good? Is she good— been doing good?”
Peter blinked. “Huh? She- uh, yeah, May’s fine.”
Might be an accomplice to my kidnapping. But other than that, she’s right as rain.
No, she isn’t. She isn’t. May was innocent, she didn’t know anything, he knew it in his gut. Because any other alternative… he couldn’t even think about it.
“Good, that’s good, that’s great.” Happy nodded, just a tad too hard to be casual. “She hasn’t mentioned me at all recently, has she?”
Peter blinked. Twice. “… why?”
“No reason, just trying to make conversation.”
“You never make conversation.”
“Well, people change.” Happy glared at the slow driver in front of them with a huff. “Like I wish the turtle in front of us would change lanes.”
“Can I ask you something, Happy?”
“Depends.” Happy replied, wary as ever.
“What was Lukas Stark like?”
It was probably a good thing that they were at a standstill in traffic, because Happy’s entire body stiffened, hands twitching on the wheel. “Why would you ask me that, kid?”
“Uh, I… well me and Mr. Stark were talking, and he came up and I just… I wanna know.”
Peter highly doubted right now in the middle of New York traffic was a good time to reveal truth bombs that he’s only recently been armed with. And, quite frankly, the last thing he wanted to deal with was someone else’s shock while he was still wading through his own.
The car was quiet for a long time, moving at a snail’s pace. He was sure that Happy wouldn’t answer… until he did.
“He was a sweet kid.” Happy swallowed, voice soft and strained. “And I should’ve done more by him.”
“What does that mean?” He asked, shifting in seat.
Happy’s head shook, his words uncharacteristically thick. “Why are we talking about this, Pete? Rehashing the past doesn’t usually bring good things.”
“I just… I just need to know. Please.”
Happy was quiet for a long minute, glancing at him through the rear view mirror. He sighed, looking back towards the road ahead. “Lukas was… he was the sweetest little shithead I ever knew.”
Peter couldn’t help the laugh, a smile pulling at his lips. “Really?”
“Oh yeah, used to pester me, all the time. And do you know how hard it is to get glitter out of leather seats? I do. It’s hard. I deserved a ten percent raise just for that alone.” Happy shook his head, leaning back as he stared out the window. “Y’know, he got me a mug for my birthday. World’s Best Uncle. He was so proud of that thing.” He took a shaky breath, voice growing quieter. “Rhodes wouldn’t stop bugging me over it until the kid bought one for him, too. But I always got to say I had mine first.”
“Sounds like he really loved you.” Peter’s own voice was thick, a certain sense of loss trickling in.
Him and Happy had their own dynamic, but nothing like that. Nothing that pure and close. He wondered what Happy will think of him, when he finds out. If he will be disappointed that this is what that little kid turned into.
“Like I said, he was a sweet kid. I just wish that…” Happy shifted in seat, something open and aching that he didn’t usually allow out into the world. “That I stayed home instead of going on that trip with Tony. Then maybe… maybe he wouldn’t…” He shrugged. “I dunno, kid. I don’t know.”
“It’s not your fault.” Peter found himself saying, a ridiculous sliver of guilt gripping his throat in a stranglehold. “Whatever happened, it wasn’t because of you. And… maybe he’s okay, wherever he ended up.”
Happy huffed, working his jaw, eyes on the road as traffic began to let up. “Sure, kid. Cause that’s how these things usually go.”
Peter thought about telling him, right then and there. That he was okay, and here, and that Happy shouldn’t live with guilt over things that weren’t his fault. But at the same time… Peter wasn’t really ready for it to be real.
He wasn’t ready for his world to blow up and for the broken pieces to shape into something he couldn’t recognize. Not right now this minute, even though he knew it was inevitable.
So for the time being, for just this moment, he held his tongue, unable to force anything out anyways.
The rest of the car ride was mostly spent in silence after that.
•••••••••••••••
May felt like she was going to be sick.
She waited a few hours, for the sun to go down and for people to cool off. Then she came here.
She stood in front of Avengers Tower (she wasn’t sure why it was called that anymore, given that Tony and his family were the last ones taking up permanent residence), feeling as if her stomach was on the sidewalk.
This day was a goddamn mess.
Peter hadn’t wanted to go, worried about leaving her alone in the wreckage of this reveal. It had taken May insisting that she would be fine to get him to agree to go to the Tower, even though it twisted her insides to do so, given that she didn’t know when he’d be back.
He’s going to come back. Tony won’t keep him away forever.
She hoped so. Fuck, she hoped so.
But at the same time… she couldn’t blame Tony for wanting to. Even if a selfish part of her hated him for it. Because this was her kid.
She was the one who was there for the snotty noses and the scraped knees and the nightmares. She was the one who volunteered for school events and put up with patronizing housewives and spoiled bullies. She was the one who taught him how to be good and shaped the man that he was becoming.
She was the one who held the broken pieces of that boy together after he watched his uncle die, even as her whole being caved in like a dying star.
May didn’t care if they didn’t share a drop of blood, she was a that boy’s mother, and won’t let anyone take that away from her.
But… if any of this insanity was actually true, then Tony was that boy’s father, which had been taken away from him. And, even if unintentionally… May had allowed it to go on for more years than it had to. And that was a guilt she will have to learn to live with. An offense that she wouldn’t blame Tony if he never forgave her for it, because she’s not sure if she would forgive it herself in his shoes.
And, there was still one more thing to tell him… something that will haunt her if it never comes out, and would destroy everything if he heard it from anyone’s lips but hers.
So, there wasn’t much choice to be had. Not if she wanted to live with herself.
With that thought, she took her first step forward.
••••••••••••••••••
May got through security easily, as always since her first visit. Which only felt nearly two years ago, rather than over half a decade.
Most of the time, May resented the lost time, feeling as if she blinked and the world was different. Struggling with problems no one ever imagined happening, desperate to help everyone she could, but still falling short due to the sheer enormity.
Other times… she was relieved, to be one of the ones that was blipped. Because it meant that she didn’t have to lose her kid. She didn’t have to deal with the grief as half the world grieved with her.
She was able to blink, and everything was okay again.
… Tony Stark didn’t have that luxury, did he?
He blinked, and the world broke in front of him. He blinked, and Peter was gone. Again.
A small part of May wondered if it was better that Tony hadn’t known what he does now in that moment. That it was easier to lose a protege than a son… but ultimately knew that it was just her selfishly trying to make herself feel better about all of this.
Nothing would make this better. Nothing except time, and even that was 50/50.
May’s foot tapped as she rode up an elevator that probably cost more than her entire apartment building.
When the doors whooshed open in front of her, she saw Tony sitting alone on the couch, drink in one hand and the other… gone.
May didn’t usually see Iron Man without his second arm these days, only occasionally when she picked up Peter extra early before Tony had had his coffee.
He’d slipped one day, and told her he had too many nightmares to wear something that had a repulser in it to bed around Pepper, or god forbid Morgan if she decided to crawl in between them.
“Hey,” Tony greeted, voice raw and eyes puffy.
“Hey,” May replied, walking in. She spied a decanter and second glass on the coffee table in front of him, figuring that FRIDAY told him about her appearance ahead of time. “Are Peter and the girls here?”
“Pete’s getting a breather up on the roof, Pep and Morgan are out for the day, they’ll be back in a little while. Rhodey had to run out for work, but he’ll be back, too.” He gestured towards the decanter. “Pour yourself a glass, I’m sure you need it.”
“Not as much as you, I bet.” She said, sitting down on a chair across from him.
Tony huffed, rested the glass on his thigh as he held it. “Yeah, it’s, uh, been a day. A good day, a great day, but… a day.”
“It’s been a lot.”
He nodded, raising the glass to his lips. “Yeah. A lot.”
The room remained quiet for some time, both at a loss for what to say.
Sweat slicked May’s palms, and she tried to discreetly wipe them on her jeans before pouring herself a hefty drink. She wasn’t even sure what they were drinking, just hoped it was strong and not too expensive. But knowing the Starks, she doubted the second one.
Peter’s a Stark. Which probably explains a few things.
The Parkers were far from dumb, especially Richard the Scientist… but they weren’t smart the way Peter was. The way the Starks were.
May sometimes wondered where Peter came from… and now she knew. “Tony, there’s… there’s something I need to say—“
“Can I go first? I think I know what you’ll say, anyhow.”
“I doubt that, but sure. The floor is yours, literally.”
Tony took a sip of his drink, then lowering it slowly, idly swirling the liquor as he spoke. “I, uh… I wanted to say thank you.”
May blinked, the guilt twisting once more. “What?”
He shrugged his good shoulder, giving an approximation of a smile. “You didn’t know that the kid was mine, how could you. And you…” his eyes closed, Adam’s apple bobbing. “You did good by him, you made him who he is and he’s… Peter is so damn perfect. And the world has May Parker to thank.” His eyes were glossy when they finally met her own, that not-smile trembling the slightest bit. “You probably did better than I would’ve, so… thank you, for being there when I couldn’t. I won’t lie and say that I’m glad things went the way they did… but if Luke had to be with anyone who wasn’t me, I’m glad it was you.”
May felt like she was punched in the gut in the kindest way possible. Her throat burned as her mouth went dry, and if she didn’t know any better, she’d say that FRIDAY ticked up the thermostat by a few dozen notches. “Raising that boy was the best thing I’ve done in my life.”
Tony’s eyes closed again as he drew a shaky breath, giving a single nod. “I believe it.”
Tony took another sip of the drink, this one more of a gulp that nearly drained it entirely. His eyes opened, not quite looking at her. “I’m still going to investigate things, and I still want Peter to stay until the dust settles… but I won’t keep him from you. I know I can’t, for his sake… and for yours. But I just… I just need a minute before I let him out again, okay? I just… fuck.”
“I understand.” May nodded, not yet allowing herself relief. “And Peter will, too.”
“I hope so.” He nodded. “Do you know how hard it is to keep track of a teenager who can climb walls?”
“Do you know how terrifying it is to walk into your kitchen and see that teenager sitting on the ceiling at 3am?”
“Yes. I do know. Except it’s usually 4am when it happens here.”
May snorted despite herself, rubbing at her temples. “What even is my life.”
The side of Tony’s lips quirked up, this smile a little less strained. “I stopped asking myself that somewhere between teaching a Norse god foosball and getting a moon thrown at me.”
“… okay, I take it back. What even is your life?”
“Many things, May. Many things.”
May leaned back, her foot back to tapping. “… Tony, there’s… there’s still something I need to tell you.”
“What?” Tony asked, shifting in seat.
“I…” she wanted to swallow her words, lock them in a deep, dark cellar and throw away the key. But she knew if she didn’t say it now, she never will, and if he found out some other way… then there might really be no coming back. “I wasn’t completely honest earlier. I didn’t lie, I promise! I just… didn’t tell you everything.”
Tony stiffened, his gaze sharpening as it zeroed in on her, and in that moment, she found it very easy to believe that this man took down monsters of every variety. “What didn’t you tell me?”
“I didn’t know that Peter was Lukas Stark.” May insisted, desperate for him to believe her. “I swear on Ben’s grave I didn’t know, and never once suspected. But…” she took a breath, forcing her lips to work. “… I.. I knew that he wasn’t Richard or Mary’s.”
Tony stilled entirely, staring at her with an intensity that could burn glaciers. “You knew?”
“Not at first!” May set down the glass, afraid of spilling it as her arms waved around. “Not for years, but after… after Ben’s funeral, I was going through his things, and… he knew.”
“He knew what?” Tony asked, disbelieving and angry. “What the fuck did he know, May? What the fuck do you know?”
“He knew that Peter’s papers were fake. And he did a DNA test, between him and Peter… obviously, they didn’t match.” May felt as if her wires were cut, and that she would lose balance any moment. “He had a friend who was a cop and had access to these things. So Ben had him look into things, but once they figured out the papers weren’t real… I don’t think they looked further than that. I don’t think Ben wanted to know, whatever it meant.”
“When?” Tony said, so cold it gave her shivers. “How long did he know?”
“I’m not sure.” May shook her head. “I found the files he had on it, but nothing was dated. But I think… I think it was a year after we took in Peter. Because I… I asked if we should look into it, because something was so seriously off about Richard and Mary’s story, but Ben… he didn’t want to. He said it would be a waste of time, that we had Peter’s papers and everything looked fine.”
“And you just believed that?”
“… I think I wanted to believe it. I wanted to think that everything was fine and not worry about it. And I trusted him.”
“And when you did find out? Just didn’t wanna worry about the grieving parents, that it?”
“When Ben died, Peter was all I had left,” May’s throat threatened to close around the lump in it, sucking all the air from her lungs as her eyes stung. “I didn’t have anyone else, Tony. And I had just lost a man I planned on spending my life with, and I was… I was terrified of someone taking Peter away. Be it CPS or… or his relatives, if he had any.”
May hung her head, unable to look him in the eye any longer. “I didn’t know why Richard and Mary had him. I thought that- that they had to have a reason for what they did. That maybe things were better this way, because if Peter’s with me, then I knew he’s okay and safe and loved… I didn’t know what would happen if I opened Pandora’s box. I didn’t know if things would get better… or so, so much worse. If he would end up in some shitty foster home or abusive family members.”
May pinched the bridge of her nose, her glasses stuck between her hand and face, pushing into both. “My first thought was that Peter was adopted, and that they didn’t want anyone to know for whatever reason. Didn’t want Peter to know, maybe, but then the plane went down and their plans didn’t pan out. And that’s what I kept thinking for a while… wanted to think.”
“… does Peter know?”
“God no, of course not.” May choked a laugh, devoid of humor. “No, I couldn’t put that on him, he was already dealing with so much after watching Ben…”
May wished she could erase it from her mind, the memory of opening the door and seeing two officers with her nephew between them. And his eyes were just so… hollow. She’d noticed that before even noticing the blood staining his hoodie.
Something had broken in her baby that day, and despite May’s best efforts… she’s not sure if it ever really healed right. But she knows that night is when Spider-Man was truly born.
Not when he was bitten, not when he came up with the web-fluid, not even when he stitched together his first costume… it was when a sick man decided to rob a stranger on the street with a gun he didn’t know how to use, and pulled the trigger when Ben didn’t pull out his wallet fast enough.
And when her baby was drowning in grief and guilt and May was desperately trying to stay above water herself… she’d found that damn box in Ben’s side of the closet.
“Ben had just died, and Peter was falling apart and I just…” May didn’t have any right to cry, she knew that, but the tears just wouldn’t goddamn listen as they came. She took off her glasses and dropped them to the table, covering her face in her palms. “I didn’t know what to do, Tony. I didn’t know what to fucking do! I couldn’t lose him, and- and I was so scared that he would lose himself if he got taken away, so I didn’t… and then things started to finally be okay again, and he had that internship with you,”
She couldn’t help but huff, face still buried and unable to see his reaction. “Even though that was a load of Bull, but still, things… things were okay again. And I wanted it to keep being okay, and then I found out about Spider-Man and… I was a coward, Tony. I was a coward, and I fucked up, and I’m so, so sorry. I’m so sorry, Tony. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”
May couldn’t stop her body from wracking with the tears, teeth chattering and fingers curling. All the fear and guilt she’s cultivated since finding that box three- no, eight years ago, all falling on her all at once and burying her under the rubble.
May has spent so much of her life trying to help people, trying to glue together the pieces of a broken world, bit by bit. But keeping Peter and turning a blind eye had been the one time she was selfish, the one time she said fuck it to the consequences. Because Peter was her baby, and she didn’t know what would happen, and couldn’t make herself take that risk after taking a lifetime of others.
And because of that, May stole eight years from a man she thought of as family, and she might have lost her nephew in the process.
Then she felt a hand on her shoulder.
May stilled, then looked up to see Tony standing beside her, not quite looking at her as his eyes filled with something so achingly tired and restrained, but still… his one remaining calloused hand gave a gentle squeeze.
They were like that for a long minute, the ticking of a clock offering the only break in the silence.
May swallowed, forcing herself to look at him. “I’m sorry.”
“I know.” He replied, voice strained as he held so much back.
“I didn’t know he was yours, I swear to god, Tony. I would’ve done something if I knew someone loved him.”
“I know. I believe you.”
May let out half a breath. “Think you’ll ever forgive me?”
“Not right now, and I don’t know when.” He answered, honest. “But… I’ve made worse mistakes, with much worse consequences.”
Tony let go of her shoulder, picking up his glass before making his way to the window that took up half the wall. He hesitated, but sighed, shoulders slumping. “I want those files, and anything else you think might tell me how Peter got to where he was.”
“Of course.” May nodded even though he couldn’t see, eager for anything that wasn’t her banishment from Peter’s life. “Anything you need.”
“What I needed was my kid sixteen years ago.” Tony bit out, angry and harsh, until he reeled himself in. “If you got any other skeletons playing peekaboo in that closet of yours, now would be the time to let me know. Because if I find out that there’s anything else you’re keeping from me, and I fucking will… then I will make damn sure that you never see Peter again. Am I clear, Mrs. Parker?”
May trembled, but nodded once more. “Crystal clear, there’s nothing else, I promise.”
“Fucking better not be.” He muttered, polishing off the drink.
“Does this…” May put her glasses back on and stood, arms wrapping around herself. “Does this mean that what you said before still stands? That you won’t take him away from me?”
May wasn’t a fool, she knew that Stark had an army of lawyers on his constant payroll and- although she always wanted to have faith in the justice system, she knew too many selfish bastards sat in seats of power for anyone like her to have hopes of winning against anyone like Tony Stark. And even if they were in a perfect world with perfect judges and perfect lawyers… he would probably still win.
Tony hesitated again, and it was agony, but he sighed once more, his damaged shoulder twitching, like he wanted to do something with his other hand but forgot it wasn’t there. “He’s definitely still staying with me, that’s for sure. And you and I are on rocky ground, Mrs. Parker… but I won’t stop him from talking to you. If that’s what he wants. I can’t… I don’t know if I can take away another parent.”
May was finally able to breathe again, almost collapsing from the lack of weight on her shoulders. It wasn’t exactly what she wanted, but it was something. It was a foothold in the door, and she won’t be pushed out. She won’t have to fight as hard as she thought she would.
“I think you should go. It’s getting late.”
“Can I say goodnight to Peter first—“
“No.” Tony snapped, anger still very much present, if forcibly subdued. “Not tonight, let’s… let’s sleep on it.”
“Okay,” May replied, a an acrid taste in her mouth from backing down so easily, but knowing now wasn’t the time to push. Peter was safe, and with people who loved him, and she will see him again.
She will see him again. And that will have to be enough for tonight.
May left after that, legs shaky as she leaned back against the elevator. “What even is our lives.”
The elevator doors closed just before Tony threw his glass at the wall.