Chapter Text
Nakamura runs a hand down the front of his shirt for the fourth time in a minute. It's perfectly smooth, he'd made sure of that this morning, but the repetitive motion is soothing and he really needs to calm down before he goes down a familiar spiral.
This is just a friendly hangout. You hang out with Hirose all the time, he reminds himself, silently patting himself on the back. It took a long time to reach this level of friendship, and he's incredibly proud of that progress, but being able to hold a normal conversation with his crush has done nothing to lessen those feelings. In fact, it's only gotten worse. The more he gets to know Hirose, the tighter his chest feels; it's like his heart is just getting fuller and fuller until it's ready to explode with facts like Hirose's favorite movie series or the face he makes when there's bell pepper in his food.
"Even when I try to get here early, you always manage to beat me," comes Hirose's voice from right beside him. It takes every ounce of Nakamura's strength not to jump.
"I just like being early enough to get snacks," he explains, starting to turn towards the concession stand. When he glances back though, Hirose is still rooted in place, giving him a strange look.
"What is it?"
"Is that a new outfit?" he blurts out. He leans in closer, studying Nakamura so diligently that it makes the latter fluster.
"Uh, yeah, it is. I went shopping with two of the girls from the Exo-Pet Club the other day. They helped me picked this stuff out," Nakamura explains, fidgeting under the scrutiny. Maybe it's just in his head, but there's a twist to Hirose's mouth that seems a little off, and he has to fight the urge to shrink with shame. "Does it look weird?"
Hirose shakes his head. "No, it looks really stylish. And it's a good color on you."
"Oh, th-thanks."
"I'm just surprised. You didn't say anything about needing new clothes," Hirose adds, tugging lightly on Nakamura's sleeve. "I could've helped you pick stuff out, ya know. Ah, hey— or is it that you don't like my style?"
"Huh? No! Your style is very c-" Don't say cute, don't say cute. "Cool! It suits you."
Squinting like he doesn't quite believe him, Hirose lets out a hum. Nakamura hurries to add, "At first, I was just roped into carrying their bags, but then they wanted to play dress up with the men's clothes and well, I was the only one around… anyway, I wasn't sure you'd even notice, haha. I'm glad it doesn't look strange."
"Of course I'd notice! I always pay attention to you, Nakamura," Hirose insists with a pout, and Nakamura short-circuits just a bit. By the time his brain reboots, he's already been dragged onto the line for concessions.
They get a large popcorn to share, like usual, wedging it between their seats for easy access. They whisper to each other between the previews, commenting on each trailer and whether it'll be worth a trip back to the theater to see. It's comfortable, familiar, so much so that Nakamura manages to shake off some of his jitters.
That is, until he accidentally grabs Hirose's hand when they both reach for the popcorn.
He immediately lets go like it scalds him. "Sorry…"
"It's fine," Hirose assures. He pops a kernel into his mouth and grins. Nakamura manages a slight smile in return, just before the lights dim. They redirect their attention to the screen.
The film's slow opening helps Nakamura ease back into the moment, honing in on the characters being introduced on screen. It's a romantic-comedy, and the male lead is so witty that it has him grinning as he blindly reaches for some popcorn.
He grazes a warm hand. Nakamura jumps, and retreats. He glances at Hirose, but the latter has his eyes on the screen, unperturbed. He decides to wait a few seconds before trying again.
This time, Hirose's fingers touch the back of his hand. They linger, casual, like they don't mind waiting right there for whenever Nakamura decides to move out of the way. He hurries to do just that, shoving a fistful of popcorn into his mouth so that he doesn't scream.
HIROSE'S HAND WAS TOUCHING MINE! WE WERE PRACTICALLY HOLDING HANDS!!
Most of the movie passes by in a blur as that same torturous cycle continues. Every time he gets engrossed in the movie, he lets his guard down, and their hands touch. Reprieve only comes an hour into the movie, when they've finished the popcorn earlier than usual, and there's no reason to keep reaching into the bucket. Despite his relief, Nakamura can't help but also grieve the loss. It's too late in the runtime to focus on the plot anyway, so he just sits there thinking about how his whole hand tingles.
When the lights eventually come on, Nakamura can't confidently say he can describe what he just watched. Next to him, Hirose stretches his arms up over his head. "That was pretty good. I'm glad it had such a sweet ending."
"It wasn't what I expected," Nakamura said, which is probably the most honest answer he can manage at the moment.
"Same here. Ah, but let's talk as we walk. I'm starving!"
Nakamura flexes his fingers, giddy. "I can tell. You finished the popcorn so quickly."
"We finished the popcorn."
"I barely had any."
"Liar! You take such huge bites."
Nakamura has to laugh at that, caught. He doesn't mean to, really, but sometimes he just panics, and shoving popcorn in his mouth is leagues better than sticking his foot in there.
"Okay then, let's head to the diner and grab something to eat."
"Actually," Hirose says, stopping him before he can lead the way down the street. "I kinda wanted us to try a new place today. If you don't mind."
Us is another one of those things he should be used to hearing by now, but it never fails to make his heart skip. "Sure. Which place?"
Hirose leads them to a cozy Thai spot that he apparently heard about through social media. They pore over the menu together, settling on a couple of dishes to share so that they can each get a little taste of everything.
They chat about their classes while they wait, though Hirose, naturally, tires of the subject after a few minutes, shifting instead to talk about the latest mobile game they've been into.
"Are you gonna pull on the current banner?" Hirose asks, tapping through his daily tasks.
Nakamura shakes his head. "The last one used up all the pulls I had saved up," he admits sheepishly. "I don't have your luck, Hirose. I end up having to pull to full pity every time…"
"That's true. In that case, why don't you just have me pull for you next time? Maybe I'll end up being your good luck charm," Hirose says, glancing up from the phone just to give him a wink.
Nakamura can feel the steam escaping from his head. It's even whistling, though maybe that's just the whine building in the back of his throat as he stammers his way through a response.
"Ah, uh, yeah! Totally! You should, um, do… that."
Hirose laughs — the sound bright and amused, but not mocking. He's never cruel when Nakamura stumbles back into old habits, which only makes him love him more.
"If I end up pulling a really good character for you though, then you have to help me with my builds. I still can't clear endgame. I don't know how you managed to clear it with the starter units."
"Oh, really? Let me take a look."
They're so absorbed in their games, swapping strategies and complaints, that they forget where they are; in fact, it's only when their meals show up that they remember they're supposed to be here for lunch. Their phones get tucked away as they rush to thank the waiter.
Hirose was the only one to order a drink — a lychee lemonade that looks especially refreshing given what a warm day it is. He brightens after just one sip, pleased.
"Oh, that's so good. I think you'd like this, Nakamura. It's just the right amount of sweet."
"Yeah? Maybe I should have ordered one too," he comments, half-smiling. It doesn't really bother him either way; he's satisfied with just water, especially when the meal itself is so tasty. To his surprise, though, Hirose pushes the lemonade towards him.
"Why don't you just try mine? I don't mind," he offers casually, though he isn't quite meeting Nakamura's eye — which is totally fine because his cheeks are already scalding and if Hirose were to look at him directly while offering a sip of his drink, he feels like he might spontaneously combust altogether.
"A-Are you sure?"
Hirose rests his chin on his palm and mumbles into his fingers, "'s not like either of us has cooties. If it's you, Nakamura, I don't mind sharing…"
"Oh…"
He reaches out slowly, mind racing a mile a minute while he slowly wraps his hand around the cold glass.
What did he mean by that? Does that mean he's never shared drinks with anyone else before? Am I the first? Oh my god, wait, this is an indirect kiss, isn't it? It's totally an indirect kiss. He just had this straw in his mouth, oh my god. Oh my god! I'm going to share an INDIRECT KISS WITH HIROSE!
He tries for a cool, casual smile, only to realize his hand is shaking so badly that the ice rattles against the side of the glass. He hastily sets it down and leans in for the straw instead. He takes a sip. Had his brain not actively been in the process of scrambling and frying itself into an omelette, he might have noted the sweet taste of lychee, or the brightness of fresh lemons. As it is, he just have the vague sensation of something cool slipping past his tingling lips. He inhales deeply and tries to regulate his breathing into something resembling normalcy.
"…It's good," he just barely manages not to croak.
Hirose, who had been watching intensely for his reaction, beams. "Right? Let me know if you want more."
More might just kill him, but at least he would die happy, he thinks. In fact, he's so giddy, that he doesn't even process the taste of his first few bites of his food. Having received the indirect blessing of his crush's lips, any food that now passes into his mouth is basically nectar of the gods.
He's so busy basking in his happiness that he's woefully unprepared for what happens next, obvious though it may have been. Hirose takes another sip of his lemonade, happily drinking from the same straw he had just shared with Nakamura.
A D-DOUBLE INDIRECT KISS???
Nakamura chokes, frantically reaching for his napkin to keep from spraying rice everywhere. Concerned, Hirose shoots out of his chair, awkwardly reaching out as if ready to pat his back while Nakamura tearfully tries to wave him off.
"I'm — cough, cough — fine," he sputters. Worried, Hirose hovers until his airways clear enough to down the rest of his water. Hirose flags down the waiter for a refill before returning to his seat.
Things are back to normal after a few more gulps of water, though Nakamura keeps the glass close to his chest for comfort more than anything. He's painfully embarrassed after that display, though Hirose, saint that he is, only seemed concerned for his well-being.
"You sure you're alright?" At his shy nod, Hirose continues, "That's good. Man, your food must be really good for how fast you were eating though."
Nakamura appreciates the shift in topic. "Ahaha, it is. Would you like to try some?"
"Yeah, can I?"
Carefully, Nakamura doles out a few scoops of his fried rice onto a small plate that he slides over Hirose's way. To his surprise, Hirose's smile falters a little, but the expression that replaces it is gone before he can puzzle out its meaning.
"Mm! That really is good. Ah, wait, here— you should try some of mine too."
At his nod, Hirose picks out a big chunk of meat. To Nakamura's surprise, instead of reaching for a plate, he just holds out his chopsticks expectantly.
"Say 'ahh~'"
"Eh?"
"Not 'eh.' Ahh," Hirose insists, pushing the chopsticks forward more insistently. "Think of it like I'm just helping you pace yourself."
Nakamura flushes. "That's really not—"
"Aww, come on!"
He hesitates, torn. On the one hand, being fed by Hirose is like something out of one of his daydreams, but one the other hand, the suggestion that he's only doing it because Nakamura apparently can't be trusted not to choke on his own food is embarrassing.
"It's really yummy," he entreats, voice low and soft. It's coaxing in a way Nakamura's never heard before, and his jaw drops open without him even registering that he's done it. With a triumphant smile, Hirose guides the chopsticks closer.
Just centimeters before it reaches his mouth, the chicken chunk falls. It drops to the tabletop and then springs right off, bouncing onto the bottom of Nakamura's shirt before finally landing on the floor. They both stare at it with blank expressions. Their gazes then shift, in unison, to Nakamura's now stained shirt.
"S-Sorry about that…"
"It's fine! Really, no big deal."
He wets a napkin to dab at the stain, but it just grows bigger and blotchier from his efforts. He resigns himself to his fate, internally weeping over the fact that he's already stained his brand new shirt on the first wear. "I'll just cover it with my jacket when we leave…"
"I'm really sorry," Hirose insists, brows furrowed in apology. "I promise I'll make it up to you."
"You don't have to. I'm not mad at you," Nakamura assures.
"No, really, I feel bad…" he trails off, deep in thought. Suddenly, he brightens, tapping his fist against the flat of his palm in an 'Aha!' gesture. "I know! Let's go to the mall. I'll buy you a new shirt."
Nakamura blinks. "You don't have to buy me anything. I can just text my mom for tips on this kind of stain removal. I'm sure it'll come out in the wash."
"I insist. Let me make it up to you. Plus, it'll be fun! I wanted to check out a few stores anyway."
Tempted primarily by the prospect of prolonging their time together, Nakamura agrees. They split the bill and head to the closest outdoor shopping center.
Despite his claims of wanting to shop for himself, Hirose makes it his mission to pick out something for Nakamura first. It takes a lot of convincing to steer him away from some of the more expensive pieces, with Nakamura instead settling on a graphic tee for a band they both enjoy. He changes into it on the spot, tucking the soiled shirt into his bag while they walk around.
Satisfied, Hirose finally begins shopping for himself, trying on hats even though he has more than he knows what to do with. They take turns trying on different sunglasses, starting with their favorites and then moving on to the sillier styles. They even pop into a small bookstore, where Nakamura buys a new novel to read on his morning commute.
By the time the afternoon is winding down, they've both secured a few solid purchases for themselves. Though he's loathe to end the day, it feels like a good stopping point for their impromptu shopping trip. He turns to ask if Hirose is ready to head back, only to find his companion nowhere to be seen.
"Eh?"
He turns, making nearly a full 180 before spotting Hirose at the window of an accessories shop. He comes up behind him, tilting his head to one side as he tries to figure out which item it is that has caught his friend's attention.
"Nakamura, what do you think of that one?"
He follows the line of his finger, spotting a charm bracelet. Poking out from between a row of navy blue beads is a charm of a round little octopus.
"Cuuute," he breathes. The overall design is understated enough that he thinks nobody would bat an eye if he wore it everyday, which he's certain he would want to given that it's Hirose picking it out for him. On that note… "Ah, but if we're talking about jewelry for you, wouldn't the one above it be a better fit?"
Hirose mumbles something inaudible.
"Hm?"
"But if I get that one, then we won't match."
"Eh?"
Hirose turns to scowl at him, head tilting to one side with an incredulous furrow to his brow. "We're shopping together. It only makes sense if we buy something that matches. Y'know, the commemorate the day."
"Oh. Ah."
"Is that dumb? It's okay if you don't want to. I figured it might be a little silly," Hirose admits.
Nakamura has to slap himself to get his voice working again. It startles Hirose and makes him look insane to passersby but it works, and he ends up saying quickly, "Nonono! I don't think it's silly. But if we're going to get something that matches, I think we should go inside and pick out something that we both would like."
They settle on a pair of simple braided leather bracelets. After going back and forth for a while, they end up picking the red version out of a shared love for the color. It's only on their way out, when a couple of teen girls squeal behind their backs that Nakamura realizes how they must look. Bashful, he ducks his head to conceal his smile, unaware that right beside him Hirose is rubbing his nose to hide a grin behind his hand.
The trek to the train passes in warm, comfortable silence. Nakamura has come to enjoy these moments with Hirose just as much as the conversations. It's a relief not to have to fill the quiet, to not have to worry about putting his foot in his mouth or being out of the loop. He can just appreciate the warmth of Hirose by his side, and bask in the easy smiles that are tossed his way, finding comfort in the certainty that Hirose likes these moments too.
The train is jam packed with the evening crowd, people of all ages heading back home after a day of fun. Lack of space forces them into a corner, with Nakamura's arms braced against the wall while he studiously avoids eye contact. As it is, he can barely think when Hirose is pressed up against him like this.
Somehow, Nakamura survives the train ride. Hirose looks a little ruddy after the ordeal, but he chalks it up to overheating caused by the commuter crowd. The throng thins significantly at their stop, as most of the younger folk get off with them, students returning to campus after a much needed day out. They seem reluctant, groaning and dragging their feet once the university gates are in view. Nakamura can relate. The sooner they arrive, the sooner their day together will come to an end. He feels it draw nearer with every step they take, following the familiar paths past the library and through the quad, all across campus until they reach the freshmen dormitory block. Nakamura steels himself for their usual goodbye, though he decides he's made so many good memories today that he can fall asleep with a smile on his face.
So when Hirose keeps left on the path instead of turning right to go to his own building like usual, Nakamura pauses. "Aren't you gonna head back to your room?"
"After I walk you to your dorm," Hirose says casually. Like that's a thing they just do.
"I mean… you don't have to?" Why are you turning down more time with him, idiot?! And if you're gonna refuse, at least don't make it sound like a question!
He clears his throat and tries again. "I just don't want you to feel like you have to go out of your way."
"I don't mind. Besides, it's hardly far. I could probably throw a rock from my room and hit your window if I aimed it right."
"You'd definitely need a slingshot," Nakamura counters with a chuckle. "But point taken."
By this point, they've already reached the front of Nakamura's building. A quick scan of his ID unlocks the front door, and once again, he thinks their time together is drawing to a close. But Hirose just shuffles in after him and beelines for the elevator. Nakamura blinks and trails after him, confused, but not unhappy.
"Did you… want to come upstairs? I think my roommate is in right now, but he doesn't mind company," Nakamura says. To his surprise, Hirose shakes his head.
"No, that's alright. I just wanted to walk you to your door."
They step into the elevator. Nakamura presses the button for the fourth floor.
"Are you worried I'll get lost?" he jokes while they begin their ascent. Through the reflective surface of the closed doors, he gets a glimpse of Hirose's disgruntled face.
"Of course not," Hirose replies, voice deceptively light. He waves a hand as he speaks, gesturing like that explains anything. "I just wanted to… y'know, say goodbye properly and all."
"Huh?"
The elevator opens with a ding. Had it not been for the hand around his wrist, Nakamura might have still been standing there trying to figure out what he meant by that. Instead, he just asks outright.
Hirose drags him to the door of his room with a slight huff. He's red in the face again, though he's giving Nakamura such a pointed look. "Come on… Don't make me say it."
"Say what?" He's genuinely apologetic for having to ask, but he really has no clue what he's getting at.
"Ugh…" Hirose shoves his hands in his pockets. He takes them out before shoving them back in a second later, like he can't quite decide what to do with his hands. In a rare fit of awkwardness, he scuffs the toe of his sneaker against the floor, looking anywhere but at Nakamura.
"Isn't that just the thing you do on dates?" he says at long last. "You watch a movie, grab a bite to eat, and then you walk the person back home… and if all went well, you give them a goodbye kiss."
Nakamura thinks he chokes. Or maybe his lungs just gave up on breathing altogether. All he knows is that he feels lightheaded. He gasps, sucking in a much needed gulp of air.
"W-w-what?"
Hirose's eyes go wide. One of his hands finally finds something to do, tangling in his bangs in a panic. "Unless you didn't think it went well? Damn it. I'm sorry. Was it because I spilled food on you? I just thought it'd be fun to feed you."
"I- you- HUH?!"
"Can you please say something?" Hirose begs. "Even if you think it was a terrible date, I promise I can handle it. Well, if you say it nicely, maybe."
Nakamura's back hits the wall with a thud. Thank goodness because his knees are too weak to support him on their own right now. "I didn't know we were on a d-d-date. If I had known, I would have—"
Except what would he have done differently? Agonized over his outfit a little more maybe, but he had already picked out his newest outfit in the hopes it would earn a compliment from Hirose. Maybe he would have tried to be smoother, flirt a little more? Except he's long since learned that he doesn't have the charisma to pull off the kinds of flirtatious lines the male leads use in his favorite romance manga.
Okay, so maybe nothing would have gone differently, but at least he would have been AWARE, damn it!
"We were on a date. I went on a date with Hirose," he says to himself, sliding a little further down the wall, "and I didn't even realize. Oh my god, I can't tell if that makes me a loser for not realizing or a winner for scoring a date with him."
A finger presses into the center of his forehead. It's enough to halt his slow descent to the floor. His eyes cross as he tries to look down the line of Hirose's hand.
"None of that loser talk now. I wouldn't have asked you out if I thought you were a loser," he says firmly. He then drops his hand and grimaces. "Although I guess I didn't really do a good job of asking you out in the first place if you didn't even know. Wow, I really fumbled this, huh? Maybe we should just forget—"
"No!" Nakamura lurches forward, hands landing on Hirose's shoulders. He jumps, startled, but stays quiet, hearing him out.
"Even if I didn't know it was supposed to be a date, I don't ever want to forget today! I had so much fun. In fact, I think if I had realized, I would have been too nervous to even speak, so in a way, I'm glad I didn't know til now. It means I got to have a good time with you the way we always do. I like the way we are when it's just us."
"Me too," Hirose admits, a soft smile overtaking his face. "I like how we are together. It feels right."
All other thoughts besides Hirose have leaked out of Nakamura's head, leaving plenty of room for his words to bounce around his brain. I like how we are together. It feels right. It feels right. It feels right.
"Um, is it alright if we still…?"
"Kiss?"
"Y-yeah, that."
Despite his efforts at nonchalance, there's still a flash of teeth as Hirose bites his lip. Nervous. Maybe even a little shy. Nakamura didn't think it was possible to become even more enamored. But impossibly, his heart swells, expanding to accommodate these ever growing, ever blooming feelings.
Then Hirose leans in to kiss him, and the growth in his chest explodes.
It's a simple kiss. Just a chaste brush of their lips. Nakamura tries desperately to commit to memory the warmth, the pressure. The pleased little smile Hirose wears when he opens his eyes.
That was nice, he tries to say. His mouth flaps uselessly instead as no sound escape. In front of him, Hirose titters, flushed but undeniably giddy.
"Goodnight, Nakamura. I'll see you in class tomorrow."
He thinks he croaks out an agreement. Hirose starts to turn for the elevator, but Nakamura grabs his hand.
"Next weekend," he says slowly. There's a lot going on internally, a lot of mental shouting and an overgrowth of emotions, but somewhere in the tangle he picks out the words he wants to say next. "Would you go out with me again? I owe you a proper date. And I'll make sure to walk you to your door next time."
Hirose stares at him for a few seconds. Emboldened, Nakamura meets his eyes directly, beaming. Hirose's face flushes.
"Jeez, Nakamura," he grumbles, covering the lower half of his face with his hand. "You're so smooth when you want to be. I'm never ready for it."
Nakamura blinks in surprise. Was that smooth? He was just being honest.
"Yes, I'd love to go out with you again. Text me the details."
"Alright," Nakamura says. Then, because he's apparently become a new man in the past few minutes, he dips his head to press a sweet little kiss against Hirose's cheek.
"Goodnight, Hirose."
With one last parting smile — one so bright that it sears itself into Nakamura's memory alongside the rest of their day — Hirose leaves, waving until the elevator doors close.
As it turns out, Nakamura's roommate isn't home, which is great because he doesn't think he'd be able to hold himself back. He immediately throws himself onto his bed and shrieks into his pillow. He rolls around, squealing and kicking his feet. With one last triumphant shout, he flops onto his back and holds his hand above his head, admiring the red leather circling his wrist.
A buzz distracts him from his musings. Nakamura pulls out his phone to see a text from Hirose.
Hirose: btw has there been some guy yelling in your building lately?? I swear I can hear it outside