Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

 Noise echoed through Dazai’s pain-addled mind. Distantly, he could make out the jumble of voices and machinery and footsteps. But as disoriented as he was, he couldn’t understand any of it. He was left to curl up on the cold concrete floor and try desperately not to focus on the agony coursing through him.

I really hate pain.

A rough hand yanked him up by his hair, slapping his face until his eyes slowly drifted open. 

“He’s up!” Someone yelled, causing Dazai to flinch at the loud noise.

He was pulled closer to the person, their hot breath on his face as they leaned in. “Rise and shine, demon. We’ve got a whole day of fun planned.” They shook him like a rag-doll, eliciting a noise of pain as the movement pulled on his injuries. “How does that sound?” 

Dazai blearily looked up at the man pulling roughly on his scalp. “Your breath smells like rotten fish. I’m the prisoner here and yet I’m more hygienic” he grinned. 

The man’s face contorted with rage. It was the only warning Dazai got before his head was slammed against the wall. He gasped as fresh pain bloomed from his forehead and warm blood dripped into his eye. The man moved his hands from his hair and latched them around his neck, squeezing tightly. 

Dazai’s lungs burned as he tried desperately to take in air. Hands raised to feebly push against the imposing hands. His brain felt like it was shutting down, abandoning him in his time of need. Black spots danced across his vision as his arms dropped to his side. 

The next thing he knew he was thrown against a chair. His lungs spasmed as he doubled over, attempting to take in as much air as he could. He could hear footsteps nearby and the clinking of metal, but his vision was still too blurry to make anything out. 

When the world finally blinked back into focus, he was greeted by an ugly smile as the man stood right in front of him. Dazai groaned at the sight. 

“You really are hideous. Punch me in the eye next time so I don’t have to see your face.”

The man ignored his invitation, instead opting to punch him in the stomach hard enough that Dazai could hear a rib crack. Before he could even voice his pain a flurry of punches met the rest of his body. 

“That’s enough playing.”

A stern voice rang out across the room, causing the assault to immediately stop. Dazai sucked in gasping breaths. The man moved behind his chair, grabbing Dazai’s arms to keep him sitting upright. 

With the crony out of his field of vision, Dazai could see the owner of the stern voice. It was a tall but slight woman. She had black hair done up to a bun on the top of her head and a long white coat that resembled Mori’s enough to send a shiver down his spine. 

Dazai plastered a smile onto his face. “Hello again, doctor.”

“Hello, good morning.” She replied, offering a small, sinister smile of her own. “Have you been enjoying your stay? I trust my friend has been welcoming?”

“It’s been lovely. Although, I will say, the help is very ugly.”

Said “help” growled at him and twisted Dazai’s arm back until he yelped. 

The doctor tsked, shaking her head. “The Port Mafia teaches no manners. Nevermind that, we’ll have you sorted out soon.” 

She slid a scalpel from her coat pocket as she approached him. “Tell me, demon prodigy. How long have you been here?”

Dazai sucked in a breath, bracing himself. “Three days.”

The scalpel swung into his flesh. Dazai stiffened and bit back a scream. Though he was used to it, the feeling of the sharp object digging into his skin and cutting through his flesh still burned agonizingly. He tried to jerk away from the pain, but the man’s grip held fast. He grunted as the doctor removed her scalpel, revealing a neat line parallel to the other two. 

Warm blood rushed down his chest as his vision blurred again. He brought himself back as the doctor grabbed his chin, pulling it to her. She ran the scalpel against his cheek as she studied him. 

“How many more days, I wonder?”

Dazai just grinned up at her. She dropped his face and Dazai allowed himself to close his eyes and suck in a breath before turning back to her. 

She’d turned her attention to a table laden with various instruments, carefully placing the scalpel in its spot. She hadn’t even bothered to clean his blood off of the metal and it now pooled onto the table. It didn’t matter anyway, most of the other tools on the table were also covered in his blood. 

“I thought we could play a game today, what do you think, demon prodigy?”

“Eh, I’m not really into games.” A sharp slap across his face from the man behind him had him coughing. 

“That is too bad, well we could always do something else! Such as telling me the information about mission ‘D-7386’?”

“Not a chance in Hell.” 

The doctor sighed. “Ah, I figured. Well then, a game it is! My friend, could you help me with this?”

The man hit him in the head again before releasing his hold. Before Dazai could get his bearings, a strip of cloth was tied tightly around his eyes, completely blocking his vision. The man forced Dazai to his feet as they made their way out of the room. 

Walking was painful, and Dazai grit his teeth to keep from crying out. His body protested each step as he was dragged forcefully to some mystery destination. 

He sensed when they entered the new room, it was freezing and he couldn’t help but let a shiver down his spine as he was forced forward until he was on his knees. Cool metal pressed itself into his exposed skin, freezing cold spreading through him like a bite. 

“Are you ready for the game? I know I am!” Her voice was high and far too excited for Dazai’s liking. “Now, question one! This one’s an easy one. What is your name?”

“Chuuya Nakahara.” 

A sharp tsk. “Sarcasm will not be appreciated. Incorrect, I’m afraid.”

That was the only warning he received before the man thrust him forward, pushing his face into ice cold water. 

Dazai gasped in surprise on instinct, inhaling a lungful of water. He coughed against it, only inhaling more water in the process. 

His body was yanked backwards as he coughed desperately to try to clear his lungs of the water in favor of oxygen. It burned as he forced himself to breathe, feeling like fire entering his lungs. 

“Do you understand the game now? Wonderful! Let’s try again then shall we? What is your name?”

“Demon prodigy -cough- of course.”

Another tsk and his body was pressed back towards the water. 

“O-Osamu Dazai!” He yelped. The movement paused and the world stilled for just a moment. 

“Very good! See, it’s not so hard. Let’s try another one! Who killed the former port mafia president?”

“He died of illness.” Dazai answered sweetly. 

He barely had time to brace himself as he was dunked back into the frigid water. He managed to hold his breath this time but he didn’t last more than a minute before his body forced him to inhale. 

The cycle continued, the doctor would ask a classified question, Dazai would give a snarky reply, and the man would force his head into the water until Dazai came up spluttering. 

Dazai could feel the fight draining out of him. He’d already been tired after two full days of torture, and this was becoming too much for him. He wondered if they’d let him die. He couldn’t decide if he wanted that or not. It would be painful, but it would also cause the pain to stop. Although, dying in a place like this didn’t really suit his tastes.

He’d stopped answering their questions, not even bothered to give a sarcastic remark. He distantly realized that the man had let go of him, and he let himself drop to the floor. His hair and blindfold were soaked and they dripped freezing water onto his skin. He shivered. 

He faded in and out of consciousness before he felt someone pick him up. He was roughly dropped into the metal tub. 

That woke him up, his eyes flew open as he gasped and coughed, the icy chill of the water consuming all his senses. There was a large difference between having his head submerged in the water and his entire body being dunked. And that difference left him shaking and shivering. 

He was so disoriented he didn’t even notice the wires that had been attached to him until the first shock. 

He couldn’t help it. For the first time since he’d been here, for the first time in the past three days of torture, Dazai screamed. 

It had to have been some of the worst pain he’d ever endured. The blazing heat of the electric shock met the biting cold of the water, causing extreme agony. 

“Ah, you’ve woken up! The game was getting dull so I decided to spice things up!”

Dazai could hear her but barely registered her words. His chest was spasming and  couldn’t seem to take in a full breath. 

“I thought I might ask again? Give me the information on mission ‘D-7386’.”

Dazai didn’t reply. Electricity coursed through his body. The shock lasted longer than last time. A scream ripped out of him, loud and pained, tearing at his throat. Even when the electricity stopped, residuals of the shock shook his body. He choked on a cry of pain. 

“Who killed the former port mafia boss?”

Only a choked gasp. 

A scream of pain. 

“Where is Arahabaki?”

Scream. 

“What happened during mission ‘D-7386’?”

Scream. Choke. 

“Is your partner human?”

Scream. 

“What information did you gather during mission ‘D-7386’?”

His lungs were too weak for a scream. He could only let out a hoarse cry. 

The questions continued, but Dazai couldn’t hear them. He was overcome by a buzzing that filled his mind. He was fading. He was going to die. 

The words echoed through his mind as the world fell black. I’m going to die. I’m going to die. 

*****

Dazai lurched upright, crying out and gasping desperately for breath. He clutched his chest and scratched at it frantically. He couldn’t breathe. Electric shocks shot through his body, he writhed in pain. 

He forced his eyes to blink open, looking around wildly. He was in… a bedroom? And a lavish one at that. A little tacky for his tastes but… but it wasn’t cold concrete and bright white lights and sterile walls and metal chairs and scalpels and water and wires and- 

He dropped off the side of the bed. A sudden wave of nausea passing over him. He scrambled for the wastebasket on the floor, grabbing it just as the nausea broke and vomit forced itself from his shaking body. 

“Dazai?”

He vomited and heaved into the basket until there was nothing left. Then he stayed, hunched over and breathing, tears slipping down his cheeks and dropping into the trash. 

It took him a moment to realize there was a hand on his back, and through the buzzing he could hear someone’s voice. He couldn’t quite make it out though, it was too muddled and distant. 

Slowly, the buzzing subsided and he could hear the voice. So clear and comforting he almost cried. 

“It’s ok, it’s ok. I got you. You’re safe now, Dazai. It’s ok.”

“Ch-chuu-ya?” His voice was raw and pitiful. It was embarrassing. 

“Ye-yeah it’s me. Um, it’s Chuuya. I’m here. Are you… ok?”

Dazai nodded. “Just a dream. It’s fine now.”

He moved his hand from Dazai’s back, but before he could fully mourn the loss of contact, it was back with a glass of water. Dazai took it and took several small sips, the cool water down his throat distantly reminding him of the tub. 

Once he had his fill he handed the glass back to Chuuya and spit in the basket. 

“Still nauseas?”

“No. I-I’m o-okay.” 

Chuuya nodded and took the basket from Dazai. He helped him to his feet and then back into the bed. As Chuuya pulled the covers up to his neck, Dazai slowly came to a realization. 

This was Chuuya’s bedroom. 

Usually when he crashed at Chuuya’s place, he stayed on the couch or if the slug really took pity on him, the guest bedroom. But this was Chuuya’s own bedroom…. Why?

His attention snapped back to Chuuya as the teen took a step back. 

“Need anything else? Or are you uh, ok?”

Dazai slowly shook his head, mind blank. 

“Ok then. Well uh, good-goodnight. I’ll see you in the morning then-“

“Wait.”

Dazai’s mouth moved without permission. His hand had reached out and grabbed Chuuya’s sleeve, despite his mind not telling it to. Regardless of his efforts to hide it, he couldn’t deny the panic and fear that still coursed through his veins at the memory of that… experience. 

Dazai swallowed. He let go of the sleeve, but his body still shook. 

“C-could you stay? Please?”

Chuuya stared at him owlishly. Dazai felt his heart sink. Of course he wouldn’t stay, Dazai didn’t deserve his company. He ruined everything, he only deserved pain he-

“Of course.”

Dazai didn’t even register the words until Chuuya slid onto the other side of the bed. He settled in and glanced at Dazai. Dazai was still shaking. He wanted- he needed comfort. He needed to be held and told he was safe. That he was free. Because every time he closed his eyes, he was back there. 

Dazai made a pitiful noise and reached an arm out for Chuuya. Chuuya complied immediately, sliding closer and putting his arms around Dazai. He couldn’t help it. He’d been strong for so long, he couldn’t take it anymore. He melted into his partner's embrace, letting out a soft sob. He pressed himself against Chuuya’s chest. It was warm, it rose and fell steadily. His nightshirt was soft and smelled like wine and roses and Chuuya. 

“‘M sorry. I’m s-sorry. I’m sorry I-“

“Shhh it’s ok, Mackerel. I’m here, you’re safe. It’s ok.” 

His hands moved to rub circles on Dazai’s back and he could cry from how comforting the feeling was. 

“Are you ok? Do you wanna talk about it?” 

“What’s there to talk about,” Dazai mumbled. “‘M ok. Just felt sick.”

“You screamed in your sleep and then threw up. When I got here, you were breathing so fast I thought you were going to pass out. Shit, I-“ he cut himself off with a sigh, pulling Dazai a little closer. 

They laid there for a while. Just two sets of breathing and two bodies that molded together perfectly. 

“Just a dream. Chuu- Chuuya worries too much.”

“Ok Mackerel. We’ll talk tomorrow then. Goodnight.”

Dazai didn’t respond. He was already fast asleep.

****

Dazai woke up cold. He was shivering and shaking and for one terrible moment, he wondered if he was still at the compound. But the cold concrete beneath him faded into a soft mattress. The imposing white walls dissolved into dark red fancy wallpaper and white lights became the soft yellow glow of sunlight peaking through the curtains. Noises of machinery and cold voices were replaced by the hum of a radiator and distant movement from the kitchen. He was safe.

That small comfort did little to ease him, though. He was still cold, and he rolled onto his side, curling up. It was hard to breathe and he felt extremely dizzy. His injuries had gotten the memo that he was awake and now flared with pain. He was also mourning the loss of something, although he couldn’t place it. Fresh out of his dreams, his mind was still foggy and slow. 

He laid there until the dizziness had mostly passed and he could force himself to his feet. He hissed as he put weight on his injuries. He grabbed the wall and slowly made his way out of the bedroom, towards the noise in the kitchen.

The noise turned out to be Chuuya, humming to himself and busying with something on the stove. Dazai stood in the doorway, almost in a daze. Perhaps it was the head injury talking, but he was mesmerized. In a way, he looked-

The trance was broken the second Chuuya turned and noticed Dazai. 

“Ah, awake finally. Lazy mackerel.” There was a wry smile on his lips, but his eyes held worry. “Sleep ok? You moved a lot.”

“Y-yeah” Dazai blinked and shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts. He made his way to sit at the island with shaky legs that he blamed on his injuries. Chuuya turned to him as he sat.

“Hungry?”

“No.”

“Tch. I knew you’d say that.” He rolled his eyes. “Eat and then you can take some pain meds. And then we’ll… get you fixed up.” 

Dazai shifted in his seat. Despite Chuuya trying to avoid saying it, he was clearly referring to going to Mori for help. Realistically, Dazai knew this was inevitable and would eventually be helpful in the long run, but he couldn’t help the squirming under his skin and the panic that flashed through his body at the mere mention of the doctor's name. 

“Breakfast served. Bone apple teeth or whatever.” Chuuya said as he dropped a plate of scrambled eggs on the counter in front of Dazai. Dazai opened his mouth to protest but Chuuya interrupted him. “Save it. You hardly eat anything even when you aren’t injured. I doubt they fed you in that Hell hole and even if they did, I doubt you ate it.”

He slid onto the stool next to Dazai, taking a large bite of his own eggs. “Besides, I put some of that canned crab in yours.” He said around a mouthful of food.

Dazai relented, taking a tentative forkful of eggs to his mouth. He swallowed the steaming food and immediately dug in for more. Chuuya was right, he didn’t even remember the last time he ate. It wasn’t until the first bite of food was in his stomach that he remembered how starving he was. He practically inhaled the plate before sitting back on the stool with a content sigh.

Chuuya watched him in amusement. “Damn, didn’t know I was such a good cook.”

“Very gourmet,” Dazai nodded. “Almost better than the prison slop they-” 

Dazai dodged Chuuya’s punch . Chuuya rolled his eyes and got up, taking Dazai’s plate and his own to the sink. 

Dazai watched him go with a small smile plastered to his face. The food had been good, it was warm and comfortable. But his stomach still rolled angrily and the dizziness was back in full force. Pain pulsed through him in time to his heartbeat. And on top of all the pain and sickness coursing through his body, there was a touch of fear crawling in the back of his mind. 

To sum it up, Dazai felt like shit.

Chuuya’s voice broke through his haze, snapping him from his thoughts.

“I called the boss this morning. To update him. He wants us to come in as soon as possible.”

Dazai swallowed and nodded, pushing down the anxiety that spiked through him.

Chuuya finished with the dishes and turned around, waving his hands to dry them. 

“We can rebandage you and then I’ll find you some clothes, anything else you think you’ll need?”

“A noose,” Dazai sighed wistfully. 

Chuuya rolled his eyes and took his wrist, leading them to the bathroom. Dazai’s heart jolted at the contact, or perhaps that was the pain as his injuries flared. 

Once in the bathroom, Chuuya seated him on the floor and turned to grab the first aid kit again. 

“Can you get your clothes off by yourself or do you need my help?”

“Chibi’s sooo desperate to get my clothes off~”

“Bastard,” said Chibi gowled.

He’d returned with the first aid kit and was now carefully helping Dazai out of the borrowed set of pajamas. Truthfully, he could probably get out of the clothes himself, but it was nice having a set of steady, warm hands carefully maneuvering him. It was nice having Chuuya.

He blinked. Concussion, he reminded himself. You have a concussion. 

He directed his attention back to Chuuya, who was studying his injuries with a quiet hum.

“How’s it look, doc?”

“The bruisings a lot worse, and these wounds aren’t healing right,” He said as he traced the tally marks on Dazai’s chest. “It’s…”

“...Bad?” Dazai supplied when Chuuya trailed off.

“It’s ok. It’s going to be ok.” His eyes swiveled up to Dazai’s. “We’ll figure it out.”

His words sounded less like he was trying to reassure Dazai and more like he was attempting to comfort himself. 

“Of course,” Dazai grinned. “My dog would never let me die!”

Chuuya growled again and reached behind him for the kit. They lapsed into a comfortable silence as Chuuya cleaned and rebandaged his wounds. Once done, he moved on from Dazai’s injuries and began wrapping the rest of his body.

Dazai blinked in surprise. He hadn’t asked him to do that. He’d assumed that Chuuya wouldn’t bother, say it was a waste of bandages. Besides, when they met with Mori they would have to come off anyway. 

But here they were, and with every strip of the bandages concealing his skin, a modicum of comfort washed over him. Peace, calm, safety. All the things the bandages- his shield- granted him. All things his partner was now granting him. 

Chuuya’s wrapping was looser than Dazai typically did it, but he didn’t mind. It was nice, the way he did it. Chuuya tied off the end of the bandages and sat back with a sigh. He turned and began cleaning up the supplies strewn across the floor.

“I’ll go find something for you to wear, uh, you’re all good here?”

Dazai nodded and Chuuya was gone. In the sudden silence of the bathroom, Dazai couldn’t help but feel very alone. He sighed and leaned back against the cool porcelain of the tub.

Cold water. Burning. Pain. PAIN. PAIN-

Nope.

Dazai lurched forward, slapping a hand over his mouth to cover the noise of panic. He glanced at the open door of the bathroom, hoping not to see Chuuya. He didn’t want Chuuya to know how weak he was. How he couldn’t even feel water, even feel a tub without being sent into flashbacks and panic.

He carefully scooted himself away from the tub so he was leaning against the wall instead. He was dizzy. He felt unbelievably sick and he didn’t think it was only from the panic and anxiety.

Something was wrong. Really wrong. He could feel it in his body, there was something that wasn’t right. Something had broken, and he didn’t know how to fix it. 

He swallowed, staring at the ceiling and willing Chuuya to come back faster. He hurt and every time he closed his eyes he was back there and he felt nauseous and anxiety was rising through his veins and he just felt awful and he needed… he needed…

A hand was on his shoulder and blue eyes and fiery hair filled his vision. 

“Hey hey, just breathe. Do you feel alright? Something happen?”

Dazai tried not to cry in relief at seeing the red head in front of him. Chuuya was there. Chuuya meant he was safe. It was only with the teen in front of him that he realized how quick he was breathing. He slowed it to what would be considered normal, and shook his head. 

Chuuya was speaking but Dazai couldn’t quite make out what he was saying. He couldn’t focus on anything at the moment, everything seemed to be too much. He let Chuuya maneuver him as he carefully dressed Dazai in the t-shirt and jeans he’d retrieved for him. The jeans were a bit too short, ending quite a bit above his ankles, but the t-shirt was oversized enough to fit him. Not that any of that really mattered to him, he was just glad to have Chuuya. 

Once dressed, Chuuya disappeared from his view. Dazai’s heart lurched as his panic picked up. But before he could fully give in to his anxiety, Chuuya was back. Pain meds in one hand and a cold glass of water in the other. Dazai gratefully took them, trying not to make a face as the cold water hit his throat. It was all too familiar for a moment. 

With medication taken, wounds rewrapped, and borrowed clothes on, they were ready to go. Chuuya helped him to his feet, and with several deep, steadying breaths and most of his weight leaning against his partner, the two headed out. 

Every step out of the apartment seemed to send spikes of pain through his body, despite the medication dulling it. His stomach in particular hurt like hell and it was hard to breathe. Though some of that could be attributed to his growing anxiety. Every step they took was one step closer to Mori.

By the time they made it to the elevator, Dazai was already winded. He felt exhausted, he wanted nothing more than to go back to the apartment and curl up in Chuuya’s bed. Maybe Chuuya would take pity on him and stay with him for a while.

“You alright?” Chuuya’s voice pulled him from his thoughts. 

Dazai nodded and straightened up, taking some of his weight off Chuuya’s shoulders. He forced a smile back onto his lips and ignored the way it pulled uncomfortably on his injuries. He ignored the sigh and the look Chuuya gave him even more. 

The elevator doors opened to the lobby, revealing a lone receptionist at the front desk who barely spared them more than a glance. 

“A car is outside for you, Nakahara sir.”

Chuuya nodded and pulled Dazai through the front doors to where an expensive, black, mafia car idled in front. The driver was out of the car and held open the back door for the two of them. 

Chuuya set Dazai down as carefully as he could before sliding in next to him. The driver shut the door and returned to the driver's seat, starting the car. He already knew where they were headed. 

Chuuya pulled up the partition between them, blocking the driver from view. As soon as he did, Dazai slumped against Chuuya’s side. He buried his face against Chuuya’s shoulder, only then able to relax slightly. 

Chuuya hesitated before allowing himself to ease back, holding the brunette against him comfortably. Dazai let the warmth of his partner's body and the scent of his expensive cologne and the steady movement of his chest chase away all his thoughts and anxieties. He was safe here. There was nothing in the world aside from their two bodies, and as long as Chuuya held him that was alright. He’d be alright.

He wasn't exactly sure when his mind had come to the conclusion that Chuuya meant safety, but he couldn't deny the way he felt better when he had the chibi by his side.

*****

Far too soon, Chuuya was pulling away, untangling themselves from each other. Dazai clung tighter, letting out a soft noise of protest. Chuuya scoffed in return.

“Sure are clingy today.” He complained. “We’re here, we have to get out.”

Dazai sucked in a breath as all his anxieties crashed back into him in full force. Buzzing filled his ears as he diverted his entire attention to keeping his breaths even. Through the fog, he could hear Chuuya and the driver exchanging words as Chuuya lifted him out of the car. Chuuya took Dazai’s arm over his shoulder and supported him as they headed in. 

The walk there was a blur of emotions, colors, noises, and all manner of things that seemed to be there to suffocate him. It wasn’t until they reached the elevator and the heavy, metal doors closed behind them that the world slowed down again. 

Dazai blinked, glancing around the expensive elevator. Chuuya squeezed his arm, bringing his attention to the red head. 

“Hey. We’re gonna get through this, alright? It’s going to be ok.” He grinned. “We are double black after all. We’re not afraid of a little doctor's visit!”

Dazai couldn’t help but smile and nod at the bold faced lie. Double black wasn’t scared of much, but with Dazai’s terror of Mori and Chuuya’s trauma with labs and doctors and really anything medical, they made for two of the worst patients in history. 

“Dazai.” they locked eyes. “I won’t leave. I’ll stay with you, the whole time.”

It was a promise, raw and vulnerable. Much could be said about Chuuya Nakahara, but he was loyal to the bone and he would never break a promise. 

Dazai turned away. “If Chibi insists.”

Chuuya scoffed and was about to throw out a retort when the elevator bell rang, alerting them that they were soon to arrive at the top floor of the port mafia. There was only one office on the top floor. 

The two took a deep breath, glancing at each other one more time before the elevator doors opened and deposited them into a large hallway. Chuuya adjusted his hold on Dazai and led them forward.

Now Dazai really felt sick. What he had felt before was nothing compared to the nausea that rolled through him, so strong that he was sure he would vomit right here on the expensive carpet. The pain seemed to double with each step, making his vision blur and his heart pound. He felt like he was on the verge of death, and he wished he was. 

It was beyond the emotional pain that anxiety and fear brought. His body throbbed in agony. He could feel it, deep down, the ache in his chest. The pain of something completely and fundamentally wrong. 

And as much as he loathed to admit it, there was only one person he knew who could ease the ache and fix him. And it was the man behind the large, imposing double doors that Chuuya and Dazai stood in front of.

Chuuya raised his fist and rapped on the door two times. There was a brief pause, before a deep voice dripping in sick honey rang out. 

“Come in, I’ve been expecting you.”

Chuuya pushed the doors open, hauling Dazai forward. Towards his doom, towards his punishment. 

Mori smiled as the two teens marched towards his desk. There was a wicked gleam in his eye that shot ice through Dazai’s veins. 

“Ahh Dazai, welcome back. How was your stay with our rivals?”

“Booooring” Dazai whined. “It was so lame, all they did was ask me questions all day. It got old suuuuuper fast.”

“I see. Did you answer any of these questions?” 

Dazai sighed. “No, of course not. Do you take me for an amateur?”

“Of course not.” Mori stood, turning towards a door at the end of the room. Dazai knew from experience that it led to Mori’s personal infirmary. 

“I see Chuuya has taken to cleaning up after you, as usual.” Mori said as they followed him through the passage. 

“Of course! He's my loyal dog after all!”

Chuuya growled and elbowed Dazai, but there was no real heat behind it. He grumbled under his breath about not being a dog and how Dazai was a pathetic asshole, but he trailed off as they reached the infirmary. 

Dazai could feel the exact moment the fear of the past gripped Chuuya. 

Chuuya’s body stiffened and his breath caught as they entered the exam room. He shook it off fast, quick enough that no one else would notice, besides Dazai. Dazai wanted to find the words or actions to comfort Chuuya, but he was too enthralled with his own anxieties at the moment. 

“On the table, Dazai,” Mori said briskly. His back was to the two as he rifled in the drawers for his medical equipment. 

Chuuya gently set Dazai on the exam table, helping him settle. Dazai loathed it. He wished he’d dropped him roughly and left the room. Anything for him to avoid seeing Dazai so raw, so weak and so vulnerable. 

Mori turned back around, various instruments laid out behind him. 

“Thank you, Nakahara. You are free to go”

Dazai locked his eyes straight ahead, trying to will his mind to go blank, to take him far away from him, from himself. Mori hated when he did this, crawling so deep into his mind that he left his body a lifeless corpse. But no matter what punishment or reprimand he received for such actions, it was better than going through the torture with Mori alone. 

“Actually, I’d prefer to stay.”

Dazai’s head snapped up so fast it was dizzying. He stared at Chuuya in disbelief. 

I won’t leave. I’ll stay with you, the whole time.

The words echoed around his head. Though Chuuya had said them with such earnest conviction, he hadn’t really believed him. 

Mori seemed almost as surprised as Dazai at Chuuya’s words. 

“Oh? Are you sure? I’m well aware of your timidness around doctors” He smiled widely.

Dazai saw the emotion flash through his eyes, the slight hesitation followed by unwavering determination. “I’m sure”

Mori didn’t seem very happy with this development, but he took it in stride. He removed Dazai’s shirt first, and then began to assess his injuries. 

“Since you insist on staying, why not tell me about his injuries?”

Chuuya straightened and nodded. “Of course. Well, he had various cuts and bruises over his body, but I treated them. He also has some uh pretty deep knife wounds over his chest, I treated them as best as I could but… oh and a broken wrist. And uh, probably some internal bleeding or something? And maybe wounds from electrocution.”

Mori hummed as he listened to Chuuya’s report. Grabbing medical shears, he began cutting through the bandages. Dazai stiffened, his heart rate jumping again. Even though both men in the room had seen him many times without his bandages, he was still terrified of being exposed and unprotected. 

The bandages fell from his arms first, then his chest. Mori paused as they fell away, studying the bruises and scars. He reached out and pressed experimentally over his stomach.

Dazai couldn’t quite keep back his pained gasp. Especially not as Mori continued poking and prodding at his very injured chest. 

“These bruises are rather deep,” he observed. “You’ll no doubt need surgery.”

Dazai dropped his head and squeezed his eyes shut. Of course he’d known that he’d probably need surgery or something after the torture his body had been through, but he’d been holding onto a naive hope that Mori would simply prescribe him some painkillers and send him on his way. 

Mori finished with his examination, noting that his broken wrist would also need to be fixed in surgery and he’d need to be treated for electrical burns. He then left to inform the doctors of the main infirmary to expect Dazai. 

As soon as he left the room, Chuuya was up and by Dazai’s side. 

He hovered for a moment before clearing his throat. “So… Surgery, huh?”

Dazai nodded, eyes locked on the ceiling. 

“Wonder how long you’ll have to stay here,” He continued. “Hopefully not too long, ‘else I’ll be stuck doing all your work, which I’ve been doing for the past week by the way, you owe me.”

“Sure.” Truthfully, Dazai knew he owed Chuuya so much more than some paperwork. After all he’d done for him the past day, he owed Chuuya his life. Maybe he’d make it up to him by cutting down the dog jokes and letting him win a game or two at the arcade. Maybe. 

He looked over at the red head standing by his side, his blue eyes staring off into space. “Chuuya? Uh.. I wanted..” He trailed off, mumbling the rest of his sentence. 

“Huh? Speak up, mackerel.”

“I wanted… to… thank you.”

Chuuya looked at him stupidly. 

“Oh don’t make me say it again! Just… th-thanks. For like staying with me or whatever.” He fervently avoided Chuuya’s eyes. He could feel the heat rising to his cheeks and he was sure they were bright red. 

“Uh sure, no problem. That’s what partners are for, I guess.”

Dazai closed his eyes. “God, Chibi is so stupid.”

Chuuya let out an affronted squawk that made Dazai smile, some lightness forced back into the room. He truly was grateful to have Chuuya with him.