Chapter Text
Lust.
The thing that sticks with you for a long time, but not for the reason you think. It’s not in your own volition, or anyone else’s.
Nobody can choose who or what you are. But pure, undying lust can!
Lust it something that we can obtain, and claim as ours. Yet, it seems to be frothing at the mouth above our heads, just waiting to chomp down and take a bite. Thats what it was. Unpredictable, confusing. Lust could be all sorts of things. It could be people. A person. A thing. an object, once human but now reduced to one of an object. But lust could not be one, as it had no capabilities, nor idea in mind to be as such. Love. True, unfiltered love for the person you adore most.
It can be anything but that. An unavoidable topic when it comes to lust is lying, mostly to yourself about how you feel about the other person that you’re lusting over. The gaping hole is your heart is lust. A taking to a blind eye when they look your way is lust. The turn off when they laugh, or smile. Because that’s not the thing your focused on. Their figure is. Now, now- lust sounds like, and is a very cruel thing to experience - but, it eventually dissipates into the ashes, moving along with the rivers and seas as the lust-induced individual moves along to their next victim, forgetting about the little things that was their previous ‘love’. As lust is tainted with the gooey, sticky ‘feelings’ attached to its scam, it continues to plague the universe as everyone’s number one weakness.
However, there is something similar to this. But indifferent in a way, that, it could be compared to it on the same level that lust was.
Obsession.
She didn’t have a name to him.
She didn’t have a face or smile or laugh to him. All she had was this new-founded, but nevertheless estranged emotion tangled within his scum stuffed heart. He abused and tormented people for decades, obviously expecting anything from her since she is his true love. In his eyes, ego does not exist, but rather, something else. Something else deeply personal to his already shattered soul.
Pleasure.
She had accompanied him with pleasure a day by a day, smiling and winking at him, the hearty chuckles dancing right out of her tight-knit throat. She had made him not lust, nor love, but had still done something to him. I wonder what it could be?
”This blessing, floating in my abandoned garden..” A whisper, barely supported the weight of his embarrassment.
“A flower on a lily pad. A butterfly fluttering across the trees. A woman with radiant eyes, and the one that shall be mine.” Maybe it was true, that this was neither of the two recently discussed occurrences.
Maybe it was…
Maybe it was Obsession? Perhaps it was. But even he couldn’t put his finger on it. But there was one thing he could mutter out, not standing a chance against the flush that invaded his space, the effacious pounding in their heart that had yet to cease.
With the last of strength, he called out to the truth, his savior and full time lover. His disgusting fantasy that he couldn’t get rid of.
”G..Gaty… it’s… it’s her…
she’s so—
*!*
…yes. I know what i feel know.”
He suddenly arises from his pathetic quake, face drained of color along with remaining humanity.
”..I’m obsessed..
and in love full time!!!! ♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎”
Oh, what the poor man had made up his terrible delusion. He cannot fall out of his coma, though, as he has already dug deep into his grave. He cannot bury himself alive once more, as that would ruin his kept-alive fantasy.
How she would be his, and only his.
Whether she likes it or not, who cares!? As long as he gets what he wants, four will leave her alone for sure.
Right?
~