Chapter Text
Bebop was checking on the outdoor grill meticulously. It was a homemade one. Built from various thrown out smokers, grills, and other pieces of machinery scavenged through the scrapyard over the years. He usually enjoys using the grill; he considers it an extension of himself. Being that they were both made from scrap and given a purpose. Plus seeing people enjoy the food he makes with it warms his inner gears.
However, this was different.
The robot is pissed. Out of every man in all of the Cursed Apple. Lash, the one person he despises the most. Is getting all buddy-buddy with Miss Shelly, his mother. How is that even possible? Why does he have to cook FOR Lash? All after curing Miss Shelly, leaving behind the Bear Pit and thinking that he would never have to encounter that smug ass face ever again? It’s just not fair!
If he had tear ducts, Bebop knew he would be crying at this moment. So many thoughts ran through the scrap golem’s head that he didn’t realize that Graves was sitting there, behind him.
“You okay big guy?”
Bebop was jolted out of his stupor by the teenager.
“Yes, I’m fine, mate.” The robot answered, defeated.
Graves raised her eyebrow. “Liar.”
Bebop cocked his head. “And what makes you say that?”
“I would also say the same thing when I’m down.”
Bebop stared at the Necromancer, sighed, then turned back towards the grill.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Graves asked.
“What is there to talk about? Lash is hittin’ on Miss Shelly, and I don’t like that.” Bebop answered, attention still focused on the meats cooking on the grill.
Graves proceeded to sit down next to Bebop and his grill.
“And why do you hate that? Miss Shelly seems to like Lash.”
Bebop flipped a steak. “Because I hate Lash.”
“And why do you hate Lash?”
The robot finally turned his head towards the teenager. “Because he’s Lash.”
Graves got rather annoyed at that answer, that was a response she would expect herself to say. God, no wonder why it took years for Apollo and I to get together if I acted like this all the time. She thought to herself.
She quickly brought her attention back to the brooding scrap golem in front of her.
“Could you explain further? That answer is kind of… broad.”
Bebop laughed. “You really need me to explain? You fought with the arsehole yourself.”
Graves shrugged. “He actually was rather nice. Once you get past the prickish attitude.”
The scrap golem as fully turned his body towards the small necromancer. “Nice? Lash? Mate, have you gone mad?”
Graves leaned back in her seat, chuckling. “Yeah, he’s rather sweet. Who do you think helped me ask out Apollo? My mentor?”
Bebop pondered back to that post ritual chat he had with Apollo. Where he saw Graves and Lash talking. “Well, I guess if anyone could pump someone with bravado, it would be Lash…”
“Yeah, and why do you think Miss Shelly likes him? Because he’s a prick?”
Bebop, annoyed, answered. “You’re just statin’ how he can woo women, mate. That doesn’t change the fact that he’s an arsehole.” He then turned back on the grill, taking the meat out and placing it in a container.
The Necromancer looked back at Bebop’s house, and back again towards Bebop.
“Bebop, what do you think Lash’s wish was? For the Ritual?”
The robot scoffed. “What? A fuller mustache? Or a reality check?”
“Well, I thought the second one too initially.” Graves answered. “But you are not going to believe the actual answer: Curing Miss Shelly.”
Bebop nearly dropped the plate full of meats. “That can’t be right. He cannot be that selfless.”
The teenager nodded. “Lash may boast and brag. But he does not lie, and that’s what he told me.”
The robot grumbled, he knew that Apollo’s girlfriend was right. That if the stevedore did actually say his wish was to save Miss Shelly. Then it was true: Lash really was helping Bebop. Regardless if it was to taunt him with it or some other petty, nefarious purpose.
“The person I despised the most was willin’ to save the person I love the most… Heh, rather poetic, ain’t it?” Bebop joked.
“Yeah, I am still surprised about that. But considering how he’s treating Miss Shelly, he really means it.” Graves responded.
“Huh.” Bebop paused, he then hands one of the containers of perfectly cooked meats to Graves and continued. “Maybe I’ll have a heart to heart with Lash later. For now, let’s hand these steaks over.”
The Necromancer grabbed the container. “You think this container is just for Apollo?”
Bebop laughed. “Mate, I think his stomach is bottomless. How is he still that thin?”
Before Graves could retort, a massive crashing noise echoed throughout the scrapyard.
“What was that!”
Bebop quickly scanned the area; the noise could have only came one area…
oh no. The scrap golem thought.
He turned to Graves. “It came from the house… Cover the steaks and leave em’ here. I have to check on Miss Shelly!”
“I’m coming with. Apollo could be in trouble too.” She added.
They both nodded in agreement. Normally, Bebop would try to prevent a high school girl from entering a dangerous situation. But considering what he witnessed firsthand what she was capable of last week. He would love the extra help.
Another crashing noise broke the through anymore lingering thoughts. They needed to move.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Apollo carefully stepped into the kitchen. He knew of the plan he and Darcy concocted. Afterall, he made it himself. But he never actually asked her how to properly approach Lash in the first place.
Well, that’s on the list. After helping Miss Shelly first.
“Miss Shelly, this blood pudding is excellent!” The Fencer exclaimed, tasting the Ixian Blood Pudding. “It rivals that of the best bakers in Northen Ixia!
The kindly old woman smiled. “Oh, you don’t need to put me on that high of a pedestal. I’m just glad I made a dish that reminds you of home.”
Apollo wiped his mouth with a napkin. “Once again, very delicious Miss Shelly. Is there anything else I can help you with? Or do you want me to help Lash with the dishes?”
“Oh Apollo, your satisfaction is more than enough for me! You can go on ahead and help Jacob.”
The prince was confused. “Jacob?”
“Oh, that’s his first name, don’t tell him I said that to you. He told me in confidence.”
Apollo smirked. “Your secret is safe with me ma’am.” He said, while moving his way across the room to the kitchen sink. Currently occupied with a single, jazz-whistling Lash.
The teenager began washing the massive pile of dishes alongside the stevedore.
“The Lash appreciates taking the initiative. Make sure you use the abrasive side on the metal dishes.”
A solid minute passed of scrubbing dishes and washing until Lash spoke again.
“You know, it’s nice to finally meet Darcy’s Boyfriend.”
Apollo raised his eyebrow. “That’s my new name? what happened to Pretty Boy?”
“The Lash knows when someone starts a relationship, they become part of that person.”
Graves has taught Apollo how to engage in these conversations. “Oh, so should I call you Miss Shelly’s Boyfriend as well?”
Lash smiled, it seemed he enjoys the banter. “Pretty Boy it is! So why did you want to help me. Wanted to bask in perfection? Or maybe an autograph?”
Oh Gods, Apollo thought to himself, Darcy had to work with him for an entire day? I can barely last 5 minutes without wanting to punch him.
He collected his thoughts and decided to directly ask his question.
“Lash, do you know you’re… hurting Bebop by doing this?”
Lash placed another dish onto the drying rack. “Of course, The Lash loves tormenting dumb and stupid people like Bebop.”
“Oh, I’m sure insulting him in front of his mother, who you’re trying to flirt with, is obviously the high ground, isn’t it?”
This got the stevedore to be defensive. “I actually appreciate and am honest with Miss Shelly, and if Bebop doesn’t like that. That’s his problem.”
The Fencer was getting annoyed. “You know what I mean Lash. You can’t just bully your significant other’s child. That’s wrong, even for you.”
Lash finished the last dish, then turned to Apollo. “You know, you can’t talk shit about other people’s relationships when you haven’t been honest with yours.”
Apollo was furious, if it weren’t for Miss Shelly finishing up that delicious blood pudding in the other room, he would be yelling to the rafters at the asshole.
“What problem do you have we Darcy and I? You were the one that helped us in the first place!”
Lash turned around, placing his back to the sink. Turning his head towards Apollo. Eyes squinted harder than ever.
“The issue isn’t about Darcy Farcy and You. The issue is with just You.”
The Fencer is confused, “Me?”
The stevedore continued. “Yes, you. The Lash knows you have to go back home soon due to your little wish. And that’s more important to you than anything. Including your girlfriend.”
Apollo was shocked. How could Lash have read him like that? How did he know what is wish was? Why is he telling him this now? How-
Lash interrupted his train of thought. “How did the Lash know about your little conundrum? Well, a lot of people underestimate the Lash. And if you learn one thing by being the Champion in the Bear Pit. It’s learning how to read your opponent.”
Apollo stayed silent. He really did underestimate Lash from an intellectual perspective. He really did not know how to juggle Graves and his eventual life on the Throne. He would never leave Ixia for anything. But what he had with Darcy, was special.
He then felt a hand on his shoulder.
“Just tell her about you need to do. She’ll find a way. The Lash can attest to that.”
Apollo, looked at Lash. “You really think so?”
The Pit Fighter winked at him. “The Lash fought with Darcy Farcy during the ritual and knows her style. She’ll make it work.” He then looked at Miss Shelly, then smirked. “Honestly, you two can make almost anything work. As long as you work with her together on it.”
Wow, Apollo thought to himself, I can see how his advice worked with Darcy.
“Thank you for the advice, Lash. Regardless of how crass you are about it.”
Lash smiled gleefully.
“You still need to patch things up with Bebop though.”
Lash’s smile disappeared.
“Please try to, for Miss Shelly’s sake at least?”
The Pit Fighter’s face contorted, thinking really hard about what to do. It seems that trying to be nice to Bebop is mentally hurting the poor prick.
“Ugh, fine. The Lash and… Bebop will try to set up some ground rules. No promises though!”
Apollo was relieved, this was probably about as good of a result he could get with his diplomatic skills. Before he could make a respond of any kind. Lash immediately stood up from his lean, fully alert. He started tensing up and… sniffing the air?
“…. She’s here.”
The Fencer was confused. “Who? What’s going on Lash- “
CRASH
The two instantly ran towards the source of the noise, it was at the front door. Or, well, what’s left of it.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Standing before Apollo and Lash were a sizable crew of easily over a dozen gang members, led by a reptilian snake holding an automatic weapon.
“I was told there would be a Bebop and an old lady here. Not a really hot demon boy and an even hotter Lash- Oh my god it’s Lash, right in front of me. Oh my god, oh my god.”
Apollo looked at Lash, confused. “Is…. She your ex?”
Lash didn’t move a muscle, but he did answer in a whimper. “Even worse, a fan.”
The lack of bravado in that one sentence told Apollo everything he needed to know about the woman in front of him.
The snake eventually calmed herself. “Okay, I don’t know why God decided to gift me two boytoys today. But Mendoza said that there were a scrap golem and old lady that needed to be taught a lesson… and while I don’t see a Bebop- Ah I do see one old grandma!”
Miss Shelly finally walked behind Lash to see the commotion.
“Could you tell me why you destroyed my door?” Miss Shelly threateningly asked.
The reptile introduced herself. “Oh, yeah, my name is Vyper. And I’m here to extort you.”
Lash quickly put himself between the two women. “The Lash would suggest you tell your goons to leave Miss Shelly alone and back off before things escalate.”
Vyper’s eyes glazed the Pit Fighter’s body up and down like it was candy before saying anything. “Oh Lash, you’ve read my letters. Right?”
Lash immediately recoiled. “Uh-yeah… yeah… They were… detailed.”
The snaked slowly slithered up to the stevedore. Finger on chest. “So, you know how this is going to end… right?”
Apollo quickly interjected. Concerned for the Pit Fighter’s safety. “You can stop that now Vyper. Lash is already dating Miss Shelly.”
Lash looked at Apollo as if he kicked his dog.
Miss Shelly and Vyper looked at the two men, completely bewildered for even more completely different reasons. They then yelled in unison.
“DATING?”