Chapter Text
After leaving Neji in Naruto’s care, Lee makes a show of leaving in case either of them are watching him go. He starts off down the street, and only after glancing over his shoulder and making sure he’s well and truly out of sight, he ducks and rolls to the other side of the path and sneaks back toward Ichiraku. A patch of bushes sits across the narrow path from the ramen shop, he knows— he knows because he’s had a whole week to prepare for this date, and of course he scouted the area ahead of time. It’s there Lee intends to hunker down and spend the rest of the date, crouched in the ample coverage the prickly bushes provide. It won’t be comfortable, but that is the nature of sacrifice, after all, and Neji needs him.
Well, perhaps not needs. Lee knows Neji would conceivably be fine on his own, without Lee watching over him, but it’s just...Neji’s social skills are even worse than Lee’s, which is saying something. It’s best for Neji and Naruto’s future if Lee keeps watch, prepared to intervene if things do not go well. Besides, he promised Neji he would be there, and he is not going back on that promise.
It takes Lee a while to situate himself in the bushes. He drops onto his stomach and crawls between them, positioning himself so he can see underneath and past Ichiraku’s curtains. And yes, there are Neji and Naruto, Naruto sitting at the counter still and Neji standing several feet away. Lee pushes a pointy branch away from his back and tugs at a rather uncomfortable wedgie. These jumpsuits weren’t made for crawling around in bushes, exactly.
When Lee returns his attention to the date, Neji’s moved. He’s sitting next to Naruto, now, and already, he doesn’t seem as nervous as before. In fact, if Lee’s reading Neji’s body language correctly— and of course he is, he knows Neji better than anyone— he’s actually pleased. Lee only has a moment to bask in the smug satisfaction before he’s hit by something darker. He knew the date would go well if Neji gave it a chance, but...
He’d sort of been hoping Neji wouldn’t.
The thought doesn’t surprise him, though this is the first time he’s been able to put it to words. Ever since asking Naruto out for Neji, he’s felt uneasy, like all the times he’s tried to work out after eating a large meal. His training has been off all week because every time he tries to go for a run or do five hundred push-ups or whatever, it gives him too much time to think. Time to think about Neji and Naruto...dating.
What Lee doesn’t understand, however, is why he feels this way. He’s worked so hard to help connect Neji with the person he loves, so why does he keep hoping it will fall through. It’s... great that Neji has love, now. And that Lee was able to help him get it.
Lee shakes himself, turns his attention back to Ichiraku. If this keeps up, he may have to pick up a hobby to keep himself from thinking so much. Perhaps he will ask Kakashi-sensei for book recommendations.
Lee squints at Neji and Naruto’s backs. What might they be talking about? He tries to imagine how the conversation’s going. Maybe they’re talking about the food, or how much they’re looking forward to their lives together. Beyond that, Lee doesn’t have much luck. What exactly does one say when they’ve finally found love after a lifetime of waiting? It is beyond a doubt, in Lee’s mind, the most important moment in anyone’s life. He tries to imagine what he’d say if Sakura ever returned his love.
Only...that doesn’t feel right, either. It doesn’t feel bad, like seeing Neji and Naruto together does. It doesn’t feel like anything. It's just...awkward. It should make Lee happy, give him a rush of joy or excitement or nervousness or...or something, right?
This is one of the things he’d been thinking about all week, actually. He had to figure out who Neji is in love with, which was...a process. Lee by no means considers himself an expert on matters of love, but he thought he knew it well enough to spot the symptoms. Neji however, exhibits no symptoms. Figuring out who he loves, therefore, required a lot of musing over the nature of love. First, Lee thought, who are the possible options? He’d ruled out the most obvious choices, but Neji doesn’t talk to many people beyond those. So then, he wondered, is it even possible to love someone you barely know?
At this point in his detective work, he’d gotten distracted thinking about Sakura. Is it possible to love someone you barely know? What does love look like? What does it feel like? What does it mean to love someone? How do you know when you’re in love?
In figuring out Neji’s love life, he’d inadvertently figured out a big piece of his own: he does not love Sakura.
Somewhere along the way, he got it wrong. Watching Neji and Naruto now, he knows it to be true, because this is making him feel more than thoughts of Sakura ever have. He places a hand over his heart, as if he will physically be able to feel the guilt welling there. He feels guilty for lying to Sakura, for lying to everyone, for being so jealous over Neji and Naruto— Lee stops. Is it jealousy? Is that what this gross feeling is? He’s not entirely unfamiliar with the concept. He’s been jealous before, watching the other shinobi of his generation advance in their mastery of ninjustsu, but usually he’s able to shake it off by challenging himself to work harder. This is different.
Oh, Naruto’s laughing. Did Neji say something funny? Neji’s turned toward the counter currently, so Lee can’t quite see his expression, but he’s pretty sure he can imagine it— not quite smiling, but clearly pleased and clearly surprised. Neji tends not to realize when he’s said something funny, not until Lee or Tenten are laughing.
Alone, hiding in the bushes, Lee smiles fondly to himself. He shifts, then, to tug down his jumpsuit, which had been riding up again, and when he looks up again, Neji is facing Naruto, looking at him with a small soft smile that’s usually reserved for Lee.
Lee feels like somebody just dumped a bucket of ice water over his head. No - Guy-sensei has done that before, as part of a new, intensive training regime, and this feels worse. Suddenly, Lee can’t watch this anymore, no matter what he promised Neji. That gross feeling— jealously, it is most certainly jealousy— is overwhelming, now, and Lee finally knows why. He begins wiggling his way backward out of the bushes, but he freezes when someone sits on the bench right next to his hiding spot.
He can’t turn his head, can’t look and see who it is; any movement on his part, any rustling of the bushes, would alert the newcomer to his presence, and this sure would be an awkward situation to explain. A branch he’d been holding back snaps forward to hit him in the face, but Lee, a trained ninja and stealth master, doesn’t react. The small leaves, though, tickle his face and nose, and no amount of training would have been able to prevent his sudden, loud, “ Ah-CHOO!”
He stays very still.
“Lee?”
Lee cringes, then wiggles the rest of the way out of the bushes. When he finally makes it out and pops up onto his knees, leaves in his hair and an apology on his tongue, he falters when he sees who’s sitting on the bench. Lee’s been close to death many times, but never this close. In this moment, Sakura looks remarkably similar to Lady Tsunade. A muscle is jumping in her jaw, and her gaze is fixed on Lee. He has no doubt that she’s ready to clock him if he doesn’t offer a good explanation immediately .
“Oh! Hello, Sakura,” Lee says in a weak voice.
“Lee, why are you hiding in the bushes?” She asks, narrowing her eyes.
“I was not doing anything untoward, I promise!” He points at Ichiraku. “I was merely trying to watch Neji and Naruto’s date.”
Whatever Sakura was expecting Lee to say, it clearly wasn’t that. Her eyes widen and her head snaps toward Ichiraku. She leans over on the bench so she can see below Ichiraku’s curtains, but when she does, she sits up and looks at Lee, something wicked gleaming in her eyes. “Lee, will you come sit by me?”
As Lee does, he realizes the sight of Sakura doesn’t make his heart beat faster. It doesn’t make him go weak at the knees, or feel anything being in love is supposed to make you feel. Sitting next to her doesn’t make him feel nervous, or warm, or happy, or comfortable. Just… apprehensive. How did he not notice it sooner?
“Lee,” Sakura begins in a sweet voice. “Can you tell me why Neji and Naruto are on a date?”
“I set them up,” Lee says.
Sakura blinks at Lee. “Um...why? It’s not exactly the first match for either of them I’d think of.”
Lee can feel himself sliding down the bench. “Well...when you turned me down last week—,” Sakura shifts away from Lee a little at the reminder, “—Guy-sensei informed me that I was so obsessed with my own quest for love that I was overlooking the suffering of my own teammates, who were also caught up in the pangs of unrequited love. He said that maybe, if I helped them, I may be able to find love for myself.”
“Right,” Sakura says slowly, “So your solution was to set Neji up with Naruto.”
“I tried setting him up with Tenten first,” Lee says with a sigh.
“Okay,” Sakura says. Lee glances at her, and she’s obviously fighting a smile, now. “And you’re spying on them from the bushes because...”
“I was not spying !” Lee squawks, even though that’s exactly what he had been doing.
Maybe it’s the fact that they’ve been speaking more than a minute and Lee still hasn’t tried to ask her out, or the fact that Lee’s slumped so far on the bench that he’s falling off, but Sakura seems to realize something’s wrong. Her smile softens. “Lee, is everything okay?”
“Of course it is,” Lee says miserably, “I am in the springtime of my youth, it is a lovely day, my best friend is happy and in love...”
“Lee, Neji and Naruto are friends, but I can’t see them ever being anything more.” She leans over again to get another peek past the curtains. “That doesn’t look like anything more than friends talking, to me.”
“If that is the case,” Lee groans, “Then I am still a failure. That means I still have not figured out who Neji is in love with, and I have failed in securing his happiness.”
“Lee...”
“If I cannot help Neji find love,” Lee continues, finally voicing a worry that’s been nagging at him for a week, “How can I ever help myself find it?”
“Lee.” Sakura says, her tone making Lee stop and look at her. “I’m not even going to pretend to understand you or Might Guy, but have you considered that, maybe , Guy’s speech was a way of letting you know that one of your teammates—Neji—is in love with you? And that you just haven’t realized it because you’ve been so distracted?”
Lee blinks at her, his brain gone to static. What was it Guy-sensei had said to him, exactly? Something about... Oh. Lee can hear Guy’s words echoing around in his brain: “Sometimes, people just aren’t compatible with the people they want to be compatible with. And that’s okay. Sometimes, you can find what you’re looking for if you recognize that and turn to someone else. Have you ever considered anyone else, Lee?”
“Oh,” Lee says.
“There you go.”
It was after that that Guy-sensei had started talking about Lee’s teammates and unrequited love, which means...Lee shakes his head. “But...it’s Neji.”
“And you’re Rock Lee,” Sakura says, elbowing him in a way that was probably meant to be playful but was certainly going to leave a bruise. “Would you say I’m smart, Lee?”
Lee nods solemnly, eyes wide. “You’re the smartest person I know.”
“Well I’d be willing to bet that Neji is totally in love with you.”
Lee can only stare at her, mouth hanging open. Now, finally, his heart is beating faster, his nerves are jittery. He sits up eagerly. “Really? Sakura, may I ask you a personal question?”
“Uh...Sure?”
“How do you know when you are in love?”
Sakura blushes. “Oh, I...I’m not sure, really. I’d have to...Let’s see. You want to be around them all the time, I think. You know all their flaws but you care about them anyway. You want what’s best for them, and you’ll do whatever you can and let go of whatever you need to to make them happy.”
“I see.”
“Love’s not this big, world-changing thing, Lee,” Sakura says. “It’s not fireworks or a flashy gesture or a dramatic confession. Real love is soft. At least, I think so. It’s comfortable and warm and perfect.”
“It is as I feared,” Lee sighs. “Sakura, I am so sorry. I am not in love with you.”
Sakura lets out a surprised laugh, then, and claps a hand over her mouth. “I figured, Lee.”
“You did?”
“You took one look at me and decided you were in love. It doesn’t work like that.”
“You are so smart, Sakura.”
“So,” Sakura begins, a sly smile spreading across her face, “You’re not in love with me, but you are in love with someone, aren’t you?”
“I have not yet decided if—,”
“Liar! You’re blushing,” Sakura says, delighted. “You are.”
Lee claps his hands over his cheeks. “I may be in love with Neji.”
“Hah! I knew it. Ino totally owes me dinner. So? Are you going to tell him?”
Lee hesitates. He understands, now, what Neji meant about not wanting to risk friendships. He stands by what he said to Neji, though, about love being worth the risks. The important things in life are never easy, Lee knows from experience. Anything that’s worth anything will be scary and frustrating and difficult, love most of all.
But then Lee remembers the way Neji smiled at Naruto. What Sakura said about love earlier was right— if Neji’s happy with Naruto, Lee does not want to get in the way of that happiness. He sighs and slumps against the bench.
“Only if things do not work out with Naruto.”
“Well, looks like things didn’t work out with Naruto! Here’s your chance.”
Lee looks up at Sakura, then follows her gaze over to Ichiraku. Neji’s standing at the doorway, watching them with an unreadable expression. When Lee catches him staring, he starts and walks away without a word, headed— presumably— home. Lee looks at Sakura helplessly, and she gives him a little push off the bench. “Go after him, dummy!”
“Oh. Right. Thank you for your help, Sakura!”
“Anytime, Lee. Now go on!”
Neji doesn’t really know what he expected to come from his conversation with Lee; he hadn’t gotten that far in his planning. He also hadn’t, of course, expected to find Lee sitting right outside Ichiraku, as if waiting for him. Hadn’t been expecting to see Lee sitting with Sakura, the two of them chatting like old friends.
Neji likes knowing what to expect. He’s used to it. So he just walks away, even though he hates himself a little for doing it, and rethinks his plan to tell Lee about his feelings. He does slow, though, when he hears Lee call his name. A second later, there’s a hand on his arm pulling him to a stop, making him turn around and face Lee.
“I am glad I caught you!” is the first thing Lee says. Neji glances over his shoulder, where, down the path, he can still see Sakura sitting on the bench watching them.
“You didn’t have to come after me, Lee,” Neji says stiffly. “It looked like you and Sakura were getting along well.”
“Oh. Yes, but I would rather talk to you!”
This makes Neji look at Lee fully. “What, really?”
“Of course! Neji, you are my best friend!” Lee says. When Neji doesn’t respond, he continues, “How was the date?”
Neji sighs. “It wasn’t a date, Lee. Naruto’s not interested, and neither am I.”
“I see,” Lee says. He’s exhibiting signs of the same jittery excitement he gets when they’re assigned a dangerous mission or when Guy announces a new training regime. When Neji just narrows his eyes at Lee, Lee gives him a smile and a thumbs up. “I have one more date for you to go on, then.”
“No, Lee,” Neji groans. “No more dates.”
“But—,”
“Lee, do you really want to know who I am in love with? Because I’ll tell you, if it means you stop this silly game.”
Both Lee’s hand and smile fall. “I...yes.”
Neji sighs and tries to think of the best way to phrase it. Absently, he reaches up and plucks what looks like a small twig out of Lee’s hair. He’s probably only imagining the way Lee’s breath hitches, but when he meets Lee’s eyes, all of Lee’s focus is fixed on him.
It’s touching how much Lee apparently cares about his nonexistent love life. It still hurts a little, though.
“It’s you, Lee. Of course it’s you.”
Lee twitches, his mouth falling open a little, but the shock passes quickly and then Lee just nods solemnly. “If that is the case, please let me finish what I was about to say.” His smile and thumbs up return, even more enthusiastic than before. “Neji, please go out with me!”
“Huh,” Neji says. Again, not what he expected. “What?”
Lee sucks in a deep breath, and even louder than before, says, “Please go out with—,”
“No, no, I heard you,” Neji interrupts quickly, clapping a hand over Lee’s mouth. “I only mean... what?”
Lee waits until Neji’s moved his hand to say, “I would like to go on a date with you.”
Neji just stares at Lee.
“You see, it has come to my attention recently that I am, ah, very much in love with you.”
“What?” Neji repeats, dumbly. He’s not quite sure where the rest of his vocabulary disappeared to. He’s also not quite sure he cares.
“Neji, are you feeling okay? You look pale.”
“Yeah, I’m...but you were just talking to Sakura.”
“She was encouraging me to ask you on a date!”
Neji glances over at Sakura again, who grins and waves. “She was?”
“Oh, Neji, you must really be tired from your mission.” Lee grabs Neji’s hand and starts leading him back to his apartment. “You should go home and rest. I understand if you need time to respond to my question—,”
“Idiot,” Neji says, “Of course I’ll go out with you.”
Back at Neji’s apartment, Lee kisses Neji for the first time. When he turns to leave, Neji grabs him by the jumpsuit and drags him upstairs.