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The first rays of the February sun peek through the curtains of night, painting the clouds cotton-candy pink and the sky a radiant mixture of blue and gold and blazing orange. The snow that’s accumulated overnight on the blades of grass slowly melts into morning dew, droplets catching the light of the sun, colors melding in the water like a kaleidoscope. The quiet morning is broken by the sounds of the waking city of Gusu – street vendors setting up shop with experienced hands, joggers taking their daily run with their dogs around Tianyang Park, the rumble of the early morning trains and the cheerful chirps of birds.

Lan Wangji has already been awake for an hour.

Long hair neatly combed and brushed back, his low ponytail sweeping over his shoulders, held together by a pristine ribbon decorated with elegant clouds. Not a stitch on his uniform is out of place, and you’d think that the cold expression on his face is that of an experienced businessman, but he’s only eleven years of age. His backpack hangs on the backside of his desk chair, already packed with all the supplies he needs for the school day.

When he walks downstairs, he greets his brother and uncle with polite “good morning”s. He pays respect to the photos of his father and mother nestled in the alcove, surrounded by flowers that are always replaced every week. The same light and healthy breakfast awaits him at the table, and the three of them eat in silence, as always. It’s Friday, so Uncle has an early meeting at the university today, and then it’s just Lan Wangji and his brother, cleaning up the dishes and making sure the house is in its usual orderly state before they leave for school.

“Have a good day, A-Zhan. Don’t come back too late.” Lan Xichen gives his brother a kind smile.

“Mn. You too.” Lan Wangji responds.

They go their separate ways, Lan Xichen on his blue bicycle and Lan Wangji on his well-trodden daily path to the elementary school. Both of their schools are partially funded by the Cloud Recesses University, and so Uncle is part of the school board, given his position as the Headmaster of the university. As such, the two Lan brothers are well-known as the Two Jades – model students, excelling in academics and athletics, as expected from the prestigious Lan Qiren’s nephews.

Lan Wangji’s daily path to the elementary school is filled with other students walking in groups, laughing at inside jokes or whispering amongst themselves as he passes by, but he himself always walks alone.

It’s the same thing every day. The same routine. The same monotonous, colorless life. In winter, especially, when the snowflakes nip at your skin and the buildings are coated in a soft layer of white snow that gives the city a dream-like appearance.

Once he crosses the iron gates of Gusu Academy’s elementary division, though, all of that changes. And Lan Wangji would be lying if he said he wasn’t looking forward to it.

A blur of black and red flies towards Lan Wangji, so quickly that he wouldn’t have been able to dodge it even if he wanted to. An arm is looped around his neck, a head falling onto his shoulder, and then Wei Ying is snuggled up against his side, grinning up at Lan Wangji.

“Lan Zhan! Good morning!” He grins, his smile so warm it could melt the snow banks around them, and Lan Wangji’s heart skips a beat.

Every single thing about this moment is most definitely not the same thing.

From Wei Ying’s blatant violation of the uniform rules – he’s wearing a mahogany red scarf that makes the grey of his eyes shine, his blazer unbuttoned and his tie loose – to his inability to comprehend the concept of personal space, to how Wei Ying is way too pretty than any human should be allowed to look and how unfairly good he looks, boisterous black and red against the tranquil snowy white of the academy grounds.

Lan Wangji tears his gaze off Wei Ying. Instead, he stares at Jiang Cheng, walking over to Wei Ying with murder in his eyes, before he can lose himself in staring at Wei Ying’s face.

“Idiot! Get off him!” Jiang Cheng snaps. He’d yell in any other situation, but one of the academy rules is that shouting and running isn’t allowed, so Jiang Cheng’s usual prickliness is restrained.

“Aw, you’re no fun, A-Cheng! Am I not allowed to say good morning to Lan Zhan? By the way, Lan Zhan, you look good today! Winter and snow totally suit you!”

On the contrary, Lan Wangji thinks that winter is not good for him, because the heat of Wei Ying’s body is so warm, pressed against him, and it’s so cold outside. Suddenly, he doesn’t want Wei Ying to let go of him – he wants to pull Wei Ying into his arms and run his fingers through his inky black hair – and Lan Wangji flinches at the thought.

What’s wrong with me?

“Ridiculous!” He bites out, wrenching himself free of Wei Ying’s grasp.

He definitely doesn’t mourn the sudden loss of his heat source.

“Lan Zhan!!” Wei Ying tugs at Lan Wangji’s sleeve, completely ignoring how Lan Wangji is stealthily moving away from him, “Let’s go to the park after school, c’mon!”

“No.”

“Let’s go!”

“Be quiet.”

“Aw, you’re no fun!” Wei Ying sidles up to Lan Wangji’s side and pokes his cheek. “Why’re you always so uptight, Lan Er-gege?”

They’re stopped in the middle of the pathway to the main building, and the students around them have stopped to watch the commotion. He can hear them whispering about how Wei Ying, the new transfer student, has only been here since September and he’s already making trouble. Or about how they should get rid of him already, he isn’t even a legitimate child from the Jiang family anyways. For them, the elitist children of wealthy families born into money and luxury, Wei Ying’s presence is a cockroach in their spotless world, both in how he conducts himself and his status.

Whether his ears turn red from the strange indignation those whispers inspire within him, or the shameless (but so, so cute) way Wei Ying is addressing him, he doesn’t know. Perhaps it’s both.

But he shouldn’t be feeling either of these things in the first place. Wei Ying’s liquid-honey voice calling him ‘Lan Er-gege’ shouldn’t make his heart stutter to a stop, his touch shouldn’t make his stomach flutter with the wings of a thousand butterflies.

The effect Wei Ying has on him is totally, completely unfair, and the worst part is, Wei Ying doesn’t seem to notice at all. Or if he does notice, he keeps teasing him on purpose, and then what is Lan Wangji supposed to do?

Kiss him, whispers a traitorous voice, and he claps his hand over Wei Ying’s mouth to silence the voice that sounds so much like Wei Ying.

Grey eyes sparkle with lively mischief as Wei Ying touches the tip of his tongue to Lan Wangji’s palm.

He jolts his hand back as if he had been burned, and Wei Ying skips over to a fuming Jiang Cheng. “See you after school, Lan Zhan!” He shouts – no shouting in the academy, Lan Wangji instinctively thinks – before dragging Jiang Cheng off to the main building and leaving Lan Wangji standing alone in the snow. The tips of his ears flush red, but it isn’t from the cold.

He shoots a frosty glare at every student who badmouthed Wei Ying before stalking towards the main building, watching the figures of Wei Ying and Jiang Cheng in the distance all the way.

The path to school is the same every winter day. Spotless white lining the stone pathways of the elementary school, barren trees laden with snow, the campus buildings that dominate the grounds, and the sky-blue detailing of the uniforms. But Wei Ying, with black jacket and red scarf, with his infectious buoyant nature and charisma, and blatant disregard for the status quo, is starting to disrupt the predictability of Lan Wangji’s life.

I should stay away from him, Lan Wangji thinks. Wei Ying does bad things to his heart, stirs up a strange feeling that he can’t put a name to. The whirlwind of change that Wei Ying has brought to the academy – and Lan Wangji’s own life – is unpredictable and inevitable, and Lan Wangji doesn’t like it one bit. Not being able to answer why his heart is so disturbed, or why he feels like he’s standing on the edge of a precipice, ready to fall, is troublesome. If he stays away from the root of his troubles, namely Wei Ying, everything should sort itself out.

I should stay away from him, Lan Wangji tells himself, but then he reaches his classroom and Wei Ying is sitting in his seat by the window, sunlight reflected in his eyes and hair falling gently around his face, and he cannot bring himself to look away.

As if he notices Lan Wangji’s gaze boring into him, Wei Ying turns. A devastatingly brilliant smile blooms across his face just like the sun breaking over the horizon, and Lan Wangji feels himself teetering over the edge of the cliff, dangerously close to falling into the abyss that awaits him.

“You’ll come with me and A-Cheng to the park today, right?”

Lan Wangji says nothing as he takes his seat.

I won’t go.

The sun blazes high in the sky at midday, and Wei Ying drags Lan Wangji out of the classroom to eat lunch in the courtyard with Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang. The chill of winter is harsh and unyielding, even with the warmth of the sun, and Lan Wangji’s hands itch to grab Wei Ying’s scarf and pull it up to his ears.

Nie Huaisang laughs softly at something Wei Ying says, and Wei Ying grins at him in response.

Don’t look at him, look at me. He doesn’t have the will to be surprised at his thoughts anymore.

I won’t go.

On the way back to the classrooms, Wei Ying attaches himself to Lan Wangji’s arm and whines dramatically about the afternoon Chinese history class, taught by the infamously strict Lan Fenfang – otherwise known as Lan Wangji’s great-aunt. Jiang Cheng snaps at him and Nie Huaisang looks at Lan Wangji like he’s a bomb about to explode, but Lan Wangji no longer has the will to shake Wei Ying off, either.

I won’t go.

He ends up going anyways.

~

The second they pass through the gates of the academy, Wei Ying whoops loudly.

“Free for the day!” He shouts, gloating at the fact that nobody can say that he’s breaking any rules, since he’s technically not on campus.

“Shut up! You still have homework to do!” Jiang Cheng hisses. Now that he’s not on campus anymore, Jiang Cheng becomes much pricklier, like a hedgehog bristling its spikes.

“Well, I can do all of it in 30 minutes! I dare you to do it in less!”

As always, Jiang Cheng is quick to respond. “I accept your dare! In fact, I’ll do it in 20!”

“Fine by me. Lan Zhan, wait for us at the park, okay? We’ll be back in 25 minutes!” Wei Ying takes off like a bullet, Jiang Cheng chasing after him and yelling threats that would send a shiver down any grown man’s spine.

Déjà vu, Lan Wangji thinks.

Before he knows it, he finds himself sitting at a snow-free wooden table in Taomian Park. He lays out his school supplies and the sheets of problems that were handed out in his classes. The scratching of his pen fades into the background of the sounds of the city bustling around this oasis of nature and the flowing of the river that runs through Taomian Park. Here, he’s alone and surrounded by the peace and serenity of nature, and he can easily forget his deviant thoughts as he works through problem after problem, copying characters until they’re picture perfect.

Usually, he’d feel satisfied like this. Other children may prefer to be playing with their friends, but Lan Wangji – no matter how much he wished and tried to make some – has never really had any, and he’s gotten used to being alone.

But recently, his world has started to feel oddly empty when Wei Ying isn’t around. Lan Wangji has gotten used to the voice of Wei Ying filling the silence comfortably, the warmth of his presence casting a soothing spell over Lan Wangji. No doubt Wei Ying would be going on about something inconsequential like Jiang Cheng’s latest attempt to reproduce Jiang Yanli’s famous lotus and pork rib soup, or how this one science problem on their homework was utterly nonsensical, and yet he would make it seem like it was the most important of issues. And Lan Wangji would feel the earth under his feet crumbling more, tilting him over the edge, with every smile Wei Ying sends his way.

Lan Wangji finishes his worksheets in 17 minutes, distracted by his thoughts of Wei Ying once again. 2 minutes to organize all his pencils and papers in his backpack, 1 minute to fix his hair and clothes, and then he’s done.

Wei Ying’s voice breaks him out of the meditative trance he’s slipping into. Perhaps if it was anybody else, Lan Wangji would take a moment to compose himself and mourn the shattering of the tranquility he so enjoyed, but he feels no annoyance at being disturbed. If anything, it’s the opposite.

When he turns around, he’s greeted by the sight of Wei Ying standing on the edge of the clearing the tables are located in. Jiang Cheng trails behind him, arms crossed and eyes sharp, and Lan Wangji knows that he’s lost their dare once again. Wei Ying’s face lights up as Lan Wangji meets his eyes, and he waves enthusiastically.

“Lan Zhan! You’re here!”

The breeze rushing by ruffles through Wei Ying’s hair, the ends of his scarf fluttering in the wind as he keeps on waving. An earnest smile, so natural and easy that it almost looks like he’s smiling without knowing it, graces his face.

It’s really nothing special. Just a friend waving to another friend. But Wei Ying is so unfairly pretty and he looks so vulnerable, standing there as he shields his face from the wind and keeps on waving, and Lan Wangji is struck by a sudden need to be by his side, forever and always, to protect this brilliant spark of light from the people who want to strike him down.

Lan Wangji remembers the words of his brother and uncle. One day, if you find someone you love, you’ll want to hide them away from the cruelties of the world. His uncle had said. It’s what we Lans specialize in, after all, said his brother, something like melancholy in his eyes, and he’d understood that they were trying to warn him about going down the same path his father did. He’d thought that falling in love was something that inevitably lead to ruin, but right now…

It feels like drinking a warm bowl of soup on a stormy night and his brother smiling at him, like getting a kind comment on his essay from his Chinese teacher, like the ripples on a pond at the first raindrop of an April shower.

It feels like the most wonderful thing in the world, and if Lan Wangji allows himself to return Wei Ying’s smile – if he allows himself to savor the possibility that Wei Ying is happy to see him, and that the flowers blooming in his heart despite the snow are there to stay, and that he is maybe (probably, most definitely) in love with Wei Ying, then he knows he’s not on the edge of the cliff anymore.

No, he’s fallen a long time ago. He’d been falling since he was dragged over to the Jiang house almost every day at winter break. Since they had finals and Wei Ying had fallen asleep on Lan Wangji’s shoulder while they were sitting under the ginkgo tree. Since they first met that quiet night, and Wei Ying had offered one of the juice bottles he was carrying to Lan Wangji with a smile that rivaled the full moon.

“Yes,” he says, wishing to keep that smile on Wei Ying’s face until the end of time, “I am.”

~

In retrospect, it’s really all Jiang Cheng’s fault.

Wei Ying had regaled Lan Wangji with his tale of beating Jiang Cheng at his dare and finishing his homework in 15 minutes, looking all too happy to be snuggled up next to Lan Wangji at the table as they checked over each other’s homework, and Jiang Cheng had snapped.

“You!”

Completely ignored.

“Idiot!” Jiang Cheng tries again.

There’s no response from the two of them. Lan Wangji, entranced by Wei Ying’s closeness, chooses to ignore the nuisance calling them.

“Ugh, fine – Wei Ying!”

Lan Wangji swears Wei Ying scoots closer to him in an effort to annoy Jiang Cheng. Not that he’s complaining.

“Seriously?!”

“What’s that, A-Cheng?” Wei Ying smirks. “I couldn’t hear you.”

“Wei Ying. Question 16.”

“Oh, I missed that! Thanks, Lan Zhan.”

Across the table, Jiang Cheng looks like he’s about to start swearing at Wei Ying.

“A-Ying.” He grinds out, each syllable filled with murderous intent.

“Yes, A-Cheng?” Wei Ying lets go of Lan Wangji, having corrected his problems, and stuffs his papers in his backpack without a care.

“I challenge you to a game of Truth or Dare, but without the Truth!”

“Huh? Truth or Dare? Are we at some lame party? And what’s with the ‘without the Truth’ part? You might as well just challenge me.”

That is the first time Lan Wangji sees someone’s expression slip. “NO! If I win, you stop challenging me and stop saying sh – stuff like that!”

 “Alright, then… but if I win, you have to stop cursing for a week and be my servant for a day!” Wei Ying lays down his terms for the game with the utmost confidence, and Lan Wangji’s traitorous heart skips a beat again at the smirk on his face.

“Terms. Accepted.” Snarls Jiang Cheng.

Within three minutes, they’ve decided the five parts to the dare, the boy who claims the majority of wins being the victor. Wei Ying appoints – a lofty choice of word to describe what was basically 10 seconds of him shamelessly begging – Lan Wangji to be an impartial viewer in case any of the games end in a tie, and Jiang Cheng’s glare only gets darker as Lan Wangji promises not to judge in anyone’s favor.

“Hmph. We both know Lan Wangji’s gonna vote for you, Wei Ying.”

“What? That isn’t true, he’ll be fair because he’s awesome like that! Right, Lan Zhan?”

“Mn.” He says, biting his lip to stop himself from screaming out loud.

Please don’t compliment me out of nowhere, Wei Ying, you will give me a heart attack one of these days. I am not able to function properly when you are so sincere and smile at me like that.

“Whatever! Let’s start already!”

The first part is a race of three laps around the perimeter of the wooded area that surrounds the clearing they’re in. Wei Ying takes off his scarf for this, Jiang Cheng his jacket, and they seem intent on out-doing the other in discarding their clothing until Lan Wangji intervenes by dragging them to the starting line.

“Go.” Lan Wangji deadpans after giving them exactly three seconds to prepare, and Jiang Cheng falls on his face as he tries to start.

“Give us a warning before you do that, please.” He says.

“Why are you so polite to Lan Zhan but not to your own brother? How cruel, A-Cheng…” Wei Ying says from where he’s lying on the ground, having fallen in much the same manner as Jiang Cheng.

“Because you, unlike Lan Wangji, are an idiot.”

“So mean!”

Eventually, Lan Wangji manages to stop them from throwing half-baked insults at each other until the sun goes down, and they start the race properly.

Lan Wangji is running alongside them, partially to stop them from cheating, and partially to get some exercise of his own, and the brothers seem evenly matched until Wei Ying puts on a burst of speed in the final stretch and crosses the finish line a few seconds before Jiang Cheng does, to the latter’s chagrin.

“I had lots of practice running before Uncle Jiang took me in,” Wei Ying explains, and Lan Wangji’s heart aches at the casual way he says it.

One tally mark is allotted to Wei Ying’s name on the blank page of Lan Wangji’s notebook.

The next dare is one of luck – a best out of five game in rock-paper-scissors. Lan Wangji has never seen a tenser game of simple rock-paper-scissors, and he mentally sends all his luck to Wei Ying. Like last time, they’re tied at four rounds until Wei Ying throws scissors, Jiang Cheng throws rock, and Wei Ying flops on the ground like Jiang Cheng has killed him.

“Dramatic bastard,” Jiang Cheng says smugly. “Get up.”

The second mark goes to Jiang Cheng.

The third is a test of memorization and intellect, a rapid-fire round of 10 multiplication problems that Lan Wangji will be quizzing Jiang Cheng and Wei Ying on. Both insist that they’re the better one at math, and again the mood turns tense. Lan Wangji wonders why he’s putting up with this – he should find it bothersome, he should want to be studying in the peace and quiet of his bedroom right now.

Oh, right. I’m a fool in love.

“Ready?” Lan Wangji says, having wisely learned from past mistakes.

“Yeah!” They both cheer, glaring at the other for saying the same thing a moment later.

 “11 times 12.”

“132.” Wei Ying answers.

Jiang Cheng’s answer is a beat slower than his, and it goes downhill from there. At question 8 – 15 times 30 – Jiang Cheng crashes and burns, and another tally mark is added under Wei Ying’s name a minute later.

His earlier hedgehog-like prickliness is nothing now. Jiang Cheng’s current indignation and wounded pride makes him the perfect image of a cat backed into a corner, tail bristled and teeth bared.

After a win from Jiang Cheng on the fourth one – a game of mock swordplay in which Jiang Cheng distracted Wei Ying by dramatically crying out Lan Wangji’s name as if he was in trouble and promptly proceeded to disarm Wei Ying – Wei Ying accuses Jiang Cheng of cheating while Lan Wangji sits down primly on the side and proceeds to have a mini freak-out over how worried Wei Ying had looked when he dropped the fake stick-sword.

It’s only been 20 minutes since Lan Wangji had the biggest realization of his life, and it’s already out to get him. Before his conclusion that he’s head over heels for Wei Ying, he could have easily dismissed all of Wei Ying’s touches and words as ridiculous, ignoring their assault on his poor heart, but now his thoughts are unrestrained, free to latch onto everything Wei Ying does.

“Wei Ying! I’m changing the terms of the last match!” Jiang Cheng declares. “You chose the last dare, so it’s unfairly biased towards your win!”

“Who’s the one who cheated in a fair fight? Lan Zhan, didn’t you say you were gonna judge?”

“Not cheating. There were no rules against doing that.” Like he’s ever going to admit that he didn’t call out Jiang Cheng’s blatant cheating because his heart was too busy doing gymnastics, and it’s too late to go back now.

Wei Ying pouts. “Suddenly changing the dare like this because you’re scared of losing surely should count as cheating, right?”

“I’m not scared! But since Lan Wangji is here, I thought we should let him pick the last dare…”

“Haha, so considerate! What, do you like him? You better not become my competition!” Wei Ying slings an arm around Jiang Cheng’s shoulder and winks.

Lan Wangji swears he feels his ears turning several different shades of red, and his heart is soaring on the delicate wings of hope. Is he saying he’ll be jealous? Is he saying that he’s trying to win my heart? I’d give it all to you.

“Not a chance in hell.” Jiang Cheng snaps. “And what competition, idiot? There are tons of girls trying to win Lan Wangji’s heart that are better than you!”

There are? He was not aware that any girls were trying to woo him. Most everybody at school gives him a wide berth, whether it’s because he’s said to be cold and unapproachable or because of his status as the Headmaster’s nephew, and the girls that do talk to him seem to be unable to speak without stuttering or look him in the eye, which is weird. Besides, Wei Ying is… he glances at Wei Ying, laughing happily as he bothers Jiang Cheng.

Wei Ying is perfect.

“A-Cheng, I was just kidding!”

But the wings shatter with Wei Ying’s careless words, and his heart takes the fall. Wei Ying has always been this way, teasing others mercilessly and saying things he doesn’t mean, but it’s all the more painful now.

“So, Lan Zhan, what should we do?”

Don’t look at me like that.

“Lan Zhan?”

 I can’t think straight with you smiling at me like that. What do you want from me anyways? What could I possibly offer you?

“Hey, Lan Zhan?” And suddenly Wei Ying’s worried face is inches away from his, peering into Lan Wangji’s eyes.

“Ah. Wei Ying.” He says. He’s lost the ability to form a coherent sentence, so he stays silent until Wei Ying pulls away.

“Your dare?”

Lan Wangji blurts out the first thing that comes to mind, his thoughts still lagging from Wei Ying’s proximity, and that happens to be, “Pudding.”

“What?” says Jiang Cheng.

“Eat the most pudding you can. The first one to drop out loses.”

“Okay, sure!” Wei Ying agrees easily, not at all fazed by Lan Wangji’s odd suggestion. “Chocolate or vanilla?”

“Chocolate.”

“Dare accepted!”

Jiang Cheng leaps up from where he’s sitting on the grass. “Hey, wait, you can’t just decide that without me!”

“Don’t tell me you’re playing chicken, A-Cheng…?”

“Of course not! Dare accepted!”

The flames of Wei Ying and Jiang Cheng’s dare war only grow higher during their walk to the convenience store. Since Lan Wangji’s dare conveniently included no limits on the amount of pudding to be eaten, Wei Ying has his heart staunchly set on buying every single cup of chocolate pudding in the store, while Jiang Cheng tries to convince him that it’s illegal and that nobody would actually pay for all that, much less Wei Ying.

When they push open the door to the store, they’re still bickering, and the cashier greets them cheerfully. Lan Wangji feels like he’s the only sane one here, because Jiang Cheng and Wei Ying have gathered up all the chocolate pudding their little arms can carry, and unceremoniously deposit them on the check-out counter.

Thank god there’s nobody else in the store, Lan Wangji thinks.

“Can we get all the chocolate pudding you have?” Jiang Cheng asks. Like a true rich kid, he doesn’t bat an eye at his ridiculous requests, but the cashier does.

“Ah, um… are you sure? We have more in the back, but…”

“Oh, don’t worry about the money!” Jiang Cheng says. From the incredulous expression on the cashier’s face, the money isn’t what she’s worried about, but rather why these three private school kids are buying out the store’s chocolate pudding. Jiang Cheng does not notice that. “We can pay – or more, like, he’ll pay.”

“Eh? A-Cheng? You can’t put me on the spot like that!”

“Well, I forgot to bring money along with me today! Take responsibility!”

Wei Ying sighs, but he steps forward and asks how much the pudding plus the bags cost.

“That will be 404 yuan.” The cashier says, stacking the pudding she’s retrieved from the back in the bags with an expert hand. Lan Wangji steps forward to take it as Wei Ying hands over the money.

Outside, a dog barks.

The sound of coins clattering onto the plastic counter echoes through the store, and for a moment, there is silence.

Wei Ying is shaking, his hands trembling so badly that he’s unable to hold the money. Jiang Cheng stands shocked on the sidelines, reaching towards Wei Ying as if he wants to comfort him but he doesn’t know how. Wei Ying seems about ready to collapse in a ball on the floor, bringing his hands up to cover his ears slowly, when Lan Wangji – not entirely sure what the hell he’s doing – steps forward, pulling a shivering Wei Ying into his arms.

He digs a wad of money out of his backpack and counts out 4 100-yuan bills and 4 1-yuan coins.

“I will pay.” He tells Wei Ying.

Wei Ying drops his head onto Lan Wangji’s shoulder. “No – Lan Zhan – ”

The dog barks again, and Wei Ying lets out a whimper, unconsciously wrapping his arms around Lan Wangji.

“Thank you for your patronage!” The cashier says. She doesn’t seem particularly fazed by this development – she’s probably seen weirder things than three rich brats buying the store’s entire stock of chocolate pudding and one of them being scared stiff by a dog.

On the way out of the store, passing by the dog, Lan Wangji pulls Wei Ying to his other side while Jiang Cheng glares at the dog hard enough that it runs off.

“Tch. Stupid stray!” Jiang Cheng growls.

Once they reach the end of the block, Wei Ying reluctantly detaches himself from Lan Wangji and bows in apology.

“I’m sorry for troubling you, Lan Zhan, you had to step in for me back there. Haha, I shouldn’t be scared like that anymore…” Wei Ying mumbles, twisting the bottom of his jacket in his hands.

Lan Wangji blinks. “Not a trouble. Being scared is alright. I will protect you.” He says. It’s a miracle that he doesn’t combust on the spot, honestly, but as he says those words he feels determination spike within him. He will protect Wei Ying from everything – from the barbed insults of the other students and the nasty rumors, from any dog that comes near, from anything and everything, forever and always.

Like the sun breaking through the clouds, Wei Ying’s face clears and his smile is back in full strength. “Ah, Lan Zhan, you’re so kind! I’ll hold you up on that promise, alright?”

Perhaps Wei Ying is just joking – perhaps he doesn’t think Lan Wangji will seriously follow through on his vow to protect Wei Ying, maybe he thinks that it’s ridiculous that Lan Wangji would actually protect Wei Ying. But Lan Wangji will wait until Wei Ying realizes that he sincerely means it.

“Hurry up already, A-Ying, let’s do our dare already! Forget about that stupid dog and focus on us!” Jiang Cheng says. He looks away from them, a blush painting his cheeks, and Wei Ying’s smile turns a little more sincere.

“That’s just you saying that you care about me, isn’t it, A-Cheng?”

“So what if I am? Let’s go!”

“Oh.”

Wei Ying pauses in the middle of the street as he processes Jiang Cheng’s words.

Three seconds later, he lights up. “A-Cheng!! I love you!! You’re the best brother ever!!” Wei Ying cries, tackling Jiang Cheng with a hug.

“Get off me!”

Lan Wangji shakes his head and tampers down the happiness rising in him. Having friends and doing stupid stuff with them, watching them and wanting them to be happy… it’s a foreign thing to Lan Wangji.

But he finds that he doesn’t mind it.

~

For some reason, they end up going to Nie Huaisang’s house.

Jiang Cheng had insisted that he couldn’t let their jiejie see them do such a stupid dare, and going over to the Jiang house was definitely off-limits. Wei Ying had countered with saying that they couldn’t do it in the forest, since they’d have nowhere to throw away the pudding cups, and they couldn’t do it at Lan Wangji’s house, because Lan Qiren would kick them out of the academy for corrupting his precious little Lan Wangji.

So here they are, standing outside the Nie family house – really, it’s more of a mansion, with extensive grounds, complete with a small pool – and waiting for Nie Huaisang to answer the door.

“Lan Wangji dared us to eat as much pudding as we can and we need to do it at your house.” Wei Ying says once Nie Huaisang opens the door.

“What?” Nie Huaisang says. “I must have misheard you, did you say Lan Wangji dared you to – ”

A glare from Lan Wangji shuts him up quickly.

“Please let us use your house for the dare.” Jiang Cheng says.

”Okay… but you have to do it in my room, and quickly. My brother isn’t home yet but he will be soon.” Nie Huaisang ushers them inside with a look of apprehension, and even Jiang Cheng seems slightly cowed by the mention of Nie Huaisang’s brother.

Also known as Nie Mingjue, the star of the academy’s wushu team, the Nie Mingjue who has a reputation for being the most intense person you’ll ever meet, Nie Mingjue who forms the academy’s triumvirate, together with Lan Xichen and Jin Guangyao.

Nie Mingjue, who would definitely tell Lan Xichen what they were doing if he saw them carrying out this dare, who would in turn tell Lan Qiren, who in turn would give all four of them detention.

“Don’t worry! We can even sneak out through your window if worst comes to worst.” Wei Ying says.

“No, you can go out the front door. Just say you were doing homework with me. My brother’s always telling me to study more, anyways, so he won’t mind.” Nie Huaisang sighs as they turn another corner and stop in front of an elegantly decorated door, covered with watercolor paintings and calligraphy that can only be the handiwork of Nie Huaisang himself.

“So,” Nie Huaisang asks, once they’ve comfortably situated in his room, “Why exactly are you carrying three full bags of chocolate pudding? Why did Lan Wangji give you this ridiculous dare in the first place? And why does Wei Ying look so happy? It’s scaring me. Usually you doesn’t look like this unless you have a prank up your sleeve.”

“What?” Wei Ying huffs. “I do not have a prank up my sleeve! Can’t a boy be happy for no reason?”

“Lan Wangji protected him from a dog and hugged him.” Jiang Cheng says.

“Ohhhh.” Nie Huaisang nods, and Lan Wangji does not like the look on his face. “I see. Good job, Wei Ying!”

“I – he did not! Okay, well, he did, but that’s not the only reason why!”

He’s happy because I protected him? Lan Wangji blinks and takes in the pretty pink blush rising on Wei Ying’s cheeks, the way he suddenly seems at a loss for words, and is it too much to hope for his feelings to be returned, if Wei Ying is acting this way?

“A-Cheng also protected me! And he says he cares about me!”

Yes, it is too much to hope. Lan Wangji would suppose that most of Wei Ying’s happiness is because of Jiang Cheng and not because of him. It makes sense – in the months that Lan Wangji has known Wei Ying, if there’s anything he’s learned about Wei Ying it’s that he would do anything for his family, yet somehow continues to think that they don’t care about him that much.

But there’s still a part of him that wants to be the main reason why Wei Ying smiles.

“What, you didn’t know that before?” Jiang Cheng says.

“Well, I do now because you never told me!”

“Why do I have to tell you? We’re family!”

Nie Huaisang laughs. “Why are you fighting over this? Do the dare already, I wanna see how it turns out!”

At this point, both Jiang Cheng and Wei Ying have probably forgotten about the original terms of the dare and are now hyperfocused on out-eating each other. Nie Huaisang produces spoons from the drawer of his nightstand – “don’t worry, they’re clean”, he says, to the suspicious looks of Jiang Cheng and Wei Ying – and Lan Wangji mentally prepares to call the hospital in case this ends badly.

“The terms of this duel between men are as follows!” Nie Huaisang says dramatically, handing the spoons to Jiang Cheng and Wei Ying with a flourish. “The first one to not take another bite… loses! That is all. You may begin!”

The dare itself is… Lan Wangji doesn’t want to say this after all the trouble they went through to set it up, but it really is anticlimactic. Considering the nature of the dare, he should have anticipating having to sit through 20 minutes of Jiang Cheng and Wei Ying doing nothing but eating cups of chocolate pudding that rapidly pile on top of each other, and Nie Huaisang stealthily recording the whole process.

“Do not do that.” Lan Wangji tells Nie Huaisang.

“But it would be so funny – ”

“Do not do that.” Lan Wangji says, channeling the spirit of Nie Mingjue.

“Alright…” Nie Huaisang surrenders.

Lan Wangji looks at the time. 5 minutes since they’ve started the dare, Jiang Cheng having eaten his way through 16 and Wei Ying, 18. He belatedly realizes that you can only win the dare by out-eating the other person and not by eating more pudding within a certain time limit, and so if they use up all the pudding they have, the competition will never end.

The front door slamming shut is accompanied by a brusque “I’m home!” that can only come from Nie Mingjue, and Jiang Cheng drops his spoon in surprise.

Nie Huaisang sticks his head around the door and greets his brother, explaining quickly that he’s doing a school project with his friends and definitely not getting into any trouble whatsoever.

“That sounds suspicious!” Nie Mingjue bellows, and Nie Huaisang panics at the sound of his footsteps drawing closer to his room.

“No, we’re doing our homework! Right, Lan Wangji?”

“That is true.” Lan Wangji says, unwilling to lie any further. He glares at Nie Huaisang for singling him out.

“Oh, Xichen’s little bro is here? Alright, that’s fine. A-Sang, I’m going over to Guangyao’s place to do my homework, take care of the groceries I brought home.” Nie Mingjue says. A minute later, they hear the sound of the front door shutting once again, and three of them breath a collective sigh of relief.

Lan Wangji closes his eyes and thinks of what to do when he goes home, because his brother will inevitably have heard about him going over to Nie Huaisang’s house to ‘do homework’, and he’ll have to sit through 10 minutes of Lan Xichen rambling about how proud he is that his little brother is finally opening up. Not that he hates it – he’s grateful that his brother cares about him that much – but Lan Xichen has been doing this for 6 months, since Jiang Cheng and Wei Ying transferred to the academy and started hanging around Lan Wangji.

“What, do you give up?” Jiang Cheng’s voice cuts through Lan Wangji’s musings, and he shifts closer to Wei Ying’s side, like being next to Wei Ying could somehow restore his peace of mind.

“Me? No way, never! You, on the other hand…”

“Huh? What a ridiculous suggestion!”

And then they’re back to their competitive eating.

Lan Wangji almost can’t believe that he was the one who suggested the dare, but he had panicked and blurted out the first thing he could think of, which seems like a good enough excuse for him. And besides, Wei Ying looks cute like this, pointing his spoon at Jiang Cheng like it’s a weapon and proclaiming his certain victory, so it’s all working out just fine for Lan Wangji.

Well, Wei Ying looks cute no matter what, but that’s not the point.

Another five minutes, and Wei Ying has racked up an impressive 30 cups of pudding, while Jiang Cheng lags behind with 21.

“A-Cheng, don’t you dare say you’ve won yet.”

“I wasn’t. It’s obvious already. You eat too fast, so if I eat slower and wait for you to tire yourself out, I’ll automatically win!” Jiang Cheng states.

“I’m gonna win! I’m gonna win and make you my slave tomorrow!” Wei Ying shoves another spoonful of pudding in his mouth.

“You know, Wei Ying, that sounds really misleading if you take it out of context.” Nie Huaisang mutters.

“And then you’ll have to do all my chores and homework for me, and I’ll take Saturday off with Lan Zhan!”

Jiang Cheng snorts derisively and tears open another cup of pudding. “Don’t you find anything wrong with that statement? I’m sure Lan Wangji wouldn’t want to do that anyways!”

The boy in question is currently fighting his urge to break out into a grin at Wei Ying’s words.

“What? Lan Zhan! You’ll spend Saturday with me if I win, right?”

“Do not talk with your mouth full.”

“But you will, right?”

“Mn.”

Nie Huaisang breaks the shocked silence with the snap of a photo of Jiang Cheng’s disbelieving face.

“Yeah! I’m gonna win!” Wei Ying cheers.

Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes.

“Oh, you don’t believe me? Just wait and see!” Wei Ying says. His hand shakes as he grabs his 33^rd cup of pudding.

~

Wait and see, indeed.

Wei Ying reaches his limit at his 35^th cup, flopping backwards on the floor and letting the spoon fall out of his hand as Jiang Cheng calmly eats his 24^th cup.

“I can’t eat any more… The taste of chocolate pudding will haunt me in my dreams forever…” he moans.

Lan Wangji leans back to pick up the spoon, and Wei Ying takes advantage of the opportunity to lay his head in Lan Wangji's lap.

"Shameless." He says, but he allows Wei Ying to rest on him, feeling his ears burn as Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang stare at him like he's lost his mind.

He probably has. But Wei Ying is so warm and close and here, in Lan Wangji's reach, and he can't say no to Wei Ying, and maybe he's selfish for wanting to indulge in this moment and let himself bask in the illusion that Wei Ying likes him.

Lan Wangji's hand moves of its own accord, slowly coming up to comb through Wei Ying's hair. A mop of black hair falls over Wei Ying's eyes, and Lan Wangji tucks it behind his ear gently. If it were just them, he would gladly forget about everything else and keep on petting Wei Ying, trying fruitlessly to communicate all his affection through his hands. But it isn't just them, and Lan Wangji realizes this three seconds after he realizes that the expression on his face must reveal all his hidden feelings.

Do not speak of this to anyone, he thinks, the fond look he has quickly replaced by a coldly impassive glare directed at Nie Huaisang, the academy's biggest source of gossip.

Nie Huaisang declares that he's going to clean up and makes his tactical retreat.

"So... I win, then?" Jiang Cheng says. Lan Wangji is still petting Wei Ying's hair, and he averts his eyes. "Why do I feel like I'm seeing something I shouldn't?" He mutters.

"Hmm?" Wei Ying yawns. "Yeah, okay, you win... one of these days I'm gonna get you back for this. And what do you mean, something you shouldn't?"

Another yawn has him snuggling deeper into Lan Wangji, a sleepy smile on his face.

"The terms of the dare were that if I win, you'll stop challenging me and teasing me, so that'll never happen! And by that, I mean stop acting so shamelessly around Lan Wangji too... using him as a pillow is crossing the line, Wei Ying!"

"It is fine." Lan Wangji says. It's more than fine - he's practically living the dream here, somehow having gotten lucky enough to have a sleepy and incredibly cute Wei Ying in his arms - but Jiang Cheng doesn't need to know that.

"And since Lan Wangji was kind enough to give you a dare, you should let him give you an order as well, to humor him." Jiang Cheng says helpfully, ignoring how Lan Wangji is shooting daggers at him with his glare.

"Oh, sure! What do you want me to do, Lan Zhan?"

Hug me, he very nearly says. Thankfully, he catches the words forming in his mouth and instead says, "pudding".

Definitely déjà vu, he thinks.

Wei Ying frowns. "Eh? Again?"

"...Let me call you pudding."

Oh, he never wants to speak ever again. He obviously can't control his words around Wei Ying. Maybe he just won't talk whenever Wei Ying is around.

"Ah, okay! But why?"

"Nickname. Because you ate 35 cups of pudding." And because he's resigned himself to his fate, forever pining after Wei Ying, and if he can get away with calling Wei Ying a cute nickname like lovers do with a valid excuse, he'll do it.

"Hmm, guess I'm pudding now." Wei Ying says, and promptly falls asleep.

"Wei Ying - pudding?" He murmurs, trailing his fingers down Wei Ying's jaw.

Jiang Cheng sighs. "Leave him be. He's pretty exhausted."

Nie Huaisang chooses this moment to reenter the scene with a perfectly timed, "If Wei Ying is asleep, you guys could stay the night! My parents probably wouldn't mind."

"We couldn't impose on you!"

"Oh, but I just remembered that I asked them already, and they said it's fine."

"Really, we wouldn't want to be a bother. I can just wake up Wei Ying and - " They both look at a slumbering Wei Ying, and Lan Wangji keeps on stroking Wei Ying's hair, as if to say yeah, he's on my lap, what of it?

"He isn't gonna wake up, is he." Jiang Cheng drily observes, and Nie Huaisang shakes his head.

"Ah, well. Guess we'll stay over, if Mom and Dad let us."

"Great! You can use the spare bedrooms if you want." Nie Huaisang says. "Want me to show you them?"

"You're too prepared for this! I have to call Mom anyways, so fine, I'll go."

The two boys leave the room, and then it's just Wei Ying and Lan Wangji, who's tracing the lines of Wei Ying's face ever so lightly with his fingers. In sleep, Wei Ying looks almost like an angel instead of the devilish troublemaker he becomes once his eyes are open, so innocent and peaceful.

"Mmhn, Lan Zhan..." he mutters suddenly. Lan Wangji stiffens and looks down at the boy in his lap. His mind whirls as he tries to figure out why Wei Ying is saying his name in his sleep, when another murmur from Wei Ying grabs his attention.

"You'll... protect me?"

Lan Wangji waits for a minute, hut no further sound comes from Wei Ying, and Lan Wangji's heart clenches painfully.

I would. Until the world ends, until I cannot anymore, no matter what. I wish I could tell you that.

Maybe one day, he'll work up the courage to say these things to Wei Ying. But until then, he's perfectly content with simply being able to stay by Wei Ying's side, just like this.

In spite of himself, Lan Wangji cannot hold back the fond smile that tugs at his lips.

"Mn. I will. Forever and always."