Chapter Text
19:23 - court room #1
Kim Dongyoung: bye kids have fun
witness #2: have fun storming the castle boys
Lee Taeyong: be safe
juror #1: don’t do anything i wouldn’t do
judge #2: that really doesn’t leave much
witness #1: dont do anything ten would do
~
Wind whips Jaehyun’s scarf up into his face as he trudges down the gravel of the driveway, hands suck deep into the pockets of his jacket. It’s leather and fucking shitty at keeping the cold out but he’ll live - in a way he’s thankful for the chill of the wind. It clears out his brain, cutting through the fog in his head that clogs up his emotions in the aftermath of one of his dad’s pre-going out ‘conversations’.
Too many criticisms and pointed questions posed over the kitchen counter like friendly conversation make Jaehyun want to claw his face off so instead he stops under a street lamp and pulls his pack of cigarettes from his pocket. Rain begins to spit onto his face as he lights it. He smiles as smoke beings to curl up against the damp air, shadows stretching up higher and dissipating into the inky sky.
It’s not that late, but the cold weather and early autumn evening has left the street empty, warm lights in the windows flickering as Jaehyun walks through the streets leading to Renjun’s culdesac. He kicks a loose piece of gravel trying to release all the internal energy coiled up in his gut, piece by piece. He feels a little sick, like his stomach and heart have switched places and keep moving around, like restless balloons trapped in a cage, but the warm cigarette between his lips helps to ground him a little. He exhales.
Reaching Renjun’s never takes very long, especially when Jaehyun’s pissed off. So he stops himself for a moment, sheltered from the wind by a buddleia tree, letting a cloud of ash and nicotine swirl up in tiny puffs every time he takes a drag. His eyes, adjusting to the 7 o’clock twilight, settle on looking through windows of houses opposite. Most have their curtains drawn, but in one he can see a dad on his hands and knees, crawling about the front room as a tiny child clings onto his back, swinging his legs and laughing. They look happily tranquil. Jaehyun takes a drag, and moves on.
A couple of doors down, a dark splodge blinkers the warm rectangle of light shining from the upstairs window. Squinting, Jaehyun pushes damp stands of his hair out of his eyes, and the dark splodge takes a more human shape. A human guy who’s staring down at Jaehyun with what looks like intense - Jaehyun wants to say disapproval, but it’s more than that. It’s a thinking face that’s staring at him, that’s what he gathers from the far away furrowed brow and clenched jaw. Smirking, he takes his cigarette and gives a little sardonic wave, letting his spectator know his voyeurism has been detected. The eyes go wide for a second before the curtain slaps shut and Jaehyun can’t help feel pleased with himself. He’s never been very good at teen rebellion but at least he’s managed to leave an impression of being a delinquent on the stranger. Its petty but it’s a good feeling.
Jaehyun stubs out his crumbling cigarette with a sigh - he still feels like there’s a glass barrier between him and the rest of the world. But, he thinks as he jostles his backpack further onto his shoulder, nothing like getting completely plastered with a bunch of other seventeen year olds to either crash it down, or stop him thinking about it.
“You smell like smoke,” greets Renjun when he answers the door, in his usual aggravatingly neutral tone. Jaehyun grins.
“Yeah, sorry, ran through a burning building on the way here.” Renjun snorts.
“And you’re still alive.”
“Disappointing, I know.”
“Tell Jaehyun to get his skinny butt in here so you can close the fucking door,” comes a shout from inside the house and Renjun rolls his eyes.
“You want to swear any louder? I think my grandma’s rotting corpse in Jilin might not quite have heard you.”
“Sarcasm is the lowest form of humour,” Donghyuck grins.
“Is that why he’s so short?” Jaemin adds taking a sip from his drink, “Hey Jaehyun.”
“Hi,” Jaehyun replies, more flatly than he intends which just adds a guilt to the cocktail of shit he’s feeling, but Jaemin just smiles and passes him a beer.
“Okay, Jaehyun, can you tell Mark, ‘cause he’ll listen to you,” Donghyuck says rolling his eyes, as Mark blanches, “you only count as a failed over achiever if you’ve actually failed.”
“I was just saying I relate-”
“Uh-uh. Not allowed. If you want to get in on the ex-child prodigy banter, start failing, bitch.”
“I can’t tell if he’s complimenting him or insulting him,”Jaemin whispers conspiratorially to Renjun just loud enough for Jaehyun to hear and he snorts.
“Both, I think.”
“I’m just as much of a failure as you are,” protests Mark, oblivious to the commentary, “if not even more so.”
“Now that’s just a lie,” Donghyuck scoffs, “and, honestly, you fail at lying.”
“Now was that a compliment or insult?” Jaemin asks again, grinning. Jaehyun wonders idly how long he’s been drinking, but then again, Jaemin is like this all the time.
Jaehyun’s normally like that most of the time too, which makes him feel doubly shit. He just hopes his shitty mood won’t affect his friends too much.
“Insult - Hyuck’s making Mark out to be a prep,” Renjun smirks, “which he is, but doesn’t want to be. He’s in denial.”
“See I was pretty sure its a compliment,” Jaemin counters, “Hyuck is reaffirming Mark’s wholesomeness - but surely how Mark receives it matters most, right?” Renjun makes a noise of careful agreement, “so therefore, Mark’s big-ass red ears are telling us he’s flustered - ergo, compliment.”
“Hey, my ears aren’t that big!”
“Could be red from embarrassment though,” Jaehyun muses.
“Can you guys shut the fuck up, we’re trying to have an argument here,” Donghyuck snaps from his upside down position on the sofa.
“Uh, we’re allowed to talk, bitch,” Renjun returns.
“Not about me you’re not, keep my name out of your nasty mouth.”
“Why should I when its a nasty name?”
“You’re just admitting your mouth is nasty, because my name would only be nasty if it was in your mouth.”
“If you’re gonna argue,” Jeno says loudly around a mouthful of cheez-its as Jaehyun slides off the sofa to join him on the floor, “can you do it in a less confusing way. Please.”
“Yeah Renjun, shut the fuck up,” Donghyuck sneers.
“I don’t think that’s what-”
“You’re not allowed an opinion, Mark, there is a division between us that cannot be crossed.”
“Is there a reason for this argument or is it just spontaneous?” Jaehyun asks, tipping a handful of cheez-its into his mouth, washing it down with his beer, giving his taste buds a mini panic attack.
“Donghyuck and Mark got their marks back for their essays. Mark beat Donghyuck by one,” Jeno informs him tiredly and Jaehyun snorts, “it made them a grade apart.”
“Damn right it did,” Donghyuck says, ripping his own can away from his mouth that he was just about to drink from, “one bastard traitorous grade. Now I can’t even look at you,” he flops down, covering his eyes with his hand as his head lands in Mark’s lap.
“Well you’re going to have to put a blindfold on, then,” says Renjun, checking his phone, “we need to go, Jungwoo’s waiting for us already.”
“Kinky.” Jeno sighs.
Ten minutes of draining the remainder of their beers and Donghyuck being unable to find his shoes that he had thrown at Renjun earlier (“Don’t ask,” Mark advised darkly.) and they’re back out into the inky evening. The night chill seems to have lessened somehow and Jaehyun is feeling warm enough to take his hands out of his pockets. He itches for another cigarette. He switches on his phone instead.
~
19:24 - court room #1
witness #2: dont do anything
witness #2: cease all motion
juror #1: just stop fuckingin breathing
witness #2: dont tempt me
Kim Dongyoung: Thats So Edgy
witness #2: as i always say
witness #2: you can take the kid out of mcr
witness #2: but you cant take the mcr out of the kid
Kim Dongyoung: … you have literally never said that before
juror #1: you were in mcr?
lawyer for the defense: why does that sound like you’re getting fucked by mcr
Kim Dongyoung: Johnny are u cheating on ten with the whole of my chemical romance
witness #2: uh
Kim Dongyoung: do i get to put you on the sTAND?
juror #1: excuse me??????????
Kim Dongyoung set their nickname as ‘the OG judge’
witness #2: the Ojudge if you will
lawyer for the defense: I Will Not
lawyer for the defense: also can we change these names im losing track of who i am
the OG judge: so many jokes to make,,, so little time
the OG judge: do i want to tag myself? Do i want to call you an edgelord? Do i want to screenshot this and paste it over a sad picture of kermit?
the OG judge: life really is too short
juror #1: why are you like this
the OG judge: the question is why aren’t you
juror #1: mainly because im not planning on dying alone
the OG judge: well maybe some of us want to spend the rest of our lives with three goats on the top of an Austrian mountain near a tiny village where all the residents are terrified of you and dont come near you because they’re afraid you’ll eat their children in the middle of the night
witness #2: now you’re just stealing from the plot of heidi
the OG judge: its like two thousand years old or something that bitch is in the public domain
juror #1: i dont remember the child eating part though
the OG judge: well clearly you’re a fake fan
witness #2: are you sure you’re not putting heidi togeher with the bfg
the OG judge: ,,,,fucke
lawyer for the defense: togeher
the OG judge: togeher
juror #1: togeher
witness #2: thanks lads u really are top notch cucks
juror #1: for you babe? Always xox
the OG judge: togeher,,,,,, toge her,,,,, to gay her,,, too gay, her,,,,,,,, lesbians
lawyer for the defense: johnny the true lesbian icon
the OG judge: *johnny voice* let’s go lesbians
witness #2: ,,, and what is a johnny voice
juror #1: american and dumb mostly
lawyer for the defense: dont forget tall!
the OG judge: how
the OG judge: how did you make it to 17
lawyer for the defense: what?
the OG judge: nvm
lawyer for the defense set witness #2’s nickname to ‘lesbian icon’
lesbian icon: thanks
lesbian icon: now my parents have something to be proud of me for
the OG judge: uh excuse you its two things now
lesbian icon: what the other one
the OG judge: making friends with me xox
lesbian icon: yeah it really was a struggle
the OG judge: ,,,,,,,,,,,
lawyer for the defense: Top Ten Anime Betrayals
juror #1: who’s topping me now?
the OG judge: weeb
lawyer for the defense: how many Fucking times do i have to say
lawyer for the defense: i cant be a weeb cause im fucking japanese
the OG judge: ,,,,,weeb
lesbian icon: me and me only i should hope??
lawyer for the defense: wait did you think that was a command?? Like 'top Ten, anime betrayals'??
juror #1: yeah I'm clearly that fucking dumb
juror #1: or I was fucking joking
the OG judge: hmm idk tough call
the OG judge: hard to tell when you're not funny
lawyer for the defense: and you're an authority on humour are you?
the OG judge: I'm an authority on everything
lesbian icon set the OG judge's nickname as 'clown'
clown: excuse me
clown set their nickname as 'king clown'
king clown: Look on ye mighty and despair
juror #1: ,,,,,sure
lawyer for the defense: I can't believe you're making jokes when johnten is falling apart
lesbian icon: u wot
lawyer for the defense: johnny’s cheating on ten with the whole of mcr and now teen's getting topped by anime betrayals
lawyer for the defense: It's so sad
king clown: at least there will be no more kissing in the common room
juror #1: um obviously I'll be kissing Anime Betrayals you can't escape the pda
king clown: ,,,,,
lawyer for the defense: but who IS anime betrayals
king clown: a good question, watson
lawyer for the defense: ur not fucking sherlock
lesbian icon: he's not fucking anybody
king clown: I don't know if that an insult to my sex life or my identity as a human being but wow way to hurt my feeling
juror #1: don't you mean feelings
king clown: No. Singular. I only have one. And it is rage.
lesbian icon: simmer down, clown
lawyer for the defense: bars
king clown: wow lord Byron is shaking
juror #1: well it is Halloween
lawyer for the defense: it is mid October you reprobate
king clown: also to answer Yuta's question
king clown set lawyer for the defense's nickname as ‘anime betrayals’
anime betrayals: this is
anime betrayals: its not even a betrayal you were never on my side to begin with
lesbian icon: ,,,,,is anyone,,,,, really,,, on our side
juror #1: not when ur being a pretentious twat they’re not
king clown: guess ur alone forever then johnsel :/
anime betrayals: is that like an incel
king clown: maybe so
lesbian icon: It Is Not
juror #1: well i can bare witness that he really isnt
king clown: ew gross
juror #1: just because u’ve been single for 46 years
king clown: now that implies ive been single ever since i was just an egg having a bant in my mothers ovaries
king clown: however we all know my dark past and how that is not true xox
anime betrayals: HEY
anime betrayals: im not ur dark past you wanker
lesbian icon: if anything its Our dark past
lesbian icon: we’re the ones who had to put up with you two
juror #1: the grossest 10 months of my life
king clown: thank you for your entirely unwanted opinions pls go and choke
anime betrayals: each other ;;;)
lesbian icon: ,,,at the same time or??
king clown: cant believe im saying this again but suicide pact or sex? We just dont know
king clown: either way this is some romeo and juliet realness thats being served tonight
~
“Jaehyun! Hurry the fuck up, mate!”
“Shit, sorry,” Jaehyun shouts back to Jaemin, stuffing his phone into his pocket as he jogs to catch up with the group who are steadily pressing forwards, turning into Rajani’s driveway. Jaemin’s hanging back, however, smiling at him curiously as the orange street light halos his hair.
“You alright?” he asks, as Jaehyun reaches him and they start following the others.
“Yeah, no, I’m good,” Jaehyun replies, “just read something a bit confusing. Doesn’t matter.”
“Okay,” Jaemin laughs, “you sure? ‘Cause you don’t seem good, mate.”
“Nah, don’t worry - dad stuff,” Jaehyun lies easily - or at least semi-lies, because it feels like his phone is burning like a cinder in his pocket. The curiosity itches - Doyoung and Yuta? The questions bubble up inside him, making him feel almost giddy and light. Even as they clump onto the back of the group that’s bottlenecking at the front door, he feels like he’s going to laugh.
Perhaps, Jaehyun thinks, he should do a little investigation of his own.
~
Doyoung is wasting his youth. It's not the first time he's come to this conclusion; on the contrary, it's the third time he's thought it today. Maybe he'll even be able squeeze in an extra one before midnight. Who knows.
The thing is, coming to the same conclusion three times in one day - well, it kind of sucks. It’s like his brain’s caught on a loop. But if Doyoung’s going to spend all day watching Game of Thrones theories on YouTube instead of doing literally anything else, then he can’t really expect much more. He doesn't even watch Game of Thrones.
He briefly considers messaging Yuta to see if he wants to do something, like sit on swings in the park and pretend they're cooler than they are, but he quickly dismisses it. It's a strange too early, too late time and he doesn't really want to anyway. He just feels lost - again, not new but it's fucking annoying. Like he should be doing something amazing and John Hughes-esque. But he's not. It a Saturday night and he’s just listening to the same Cure song on repeat and wishing for something, anything to happen.
"Dongyoungie - we're just about to watch Strictly," comes his mum's voice from the bottom of the stairs, “are you going to join us?”
"I'm busy - maybe in a bit, sorry," he calls back on autopilot before he even has the chance to think. Busy with what? Wondering if he should read a book or have a wank? Deciding between staring at the wall or staring at the floor?
To be fair, he's not sure he wants people right now. There's a tension in him that makes him feel like he'd probably snap at his parents and he hates doing that - partly because he knows it's shitty, but mostly because that means the next our will be a Discussion About Doyoung's Feelings - with notable inclusions such as his Academic Progress and Mental Health. Which is gross but they always come out of it looking like they think they've successfully parented him - ending their speeches with the classic 'you know you can talk to us about anything'. Yeah. No.
It's not that Doyoung doesn't appreciate his parents’ investment. He really does and he knows he he’s lucky - he’d rather have his situation than Taeil’s. It's just - their open questions have correct answers; Doyoung has to let them know enough about everything so that they feel involved, but not enough so he won't have any problems they can't solve. Not that he’s over thinking his relationship with his parents or anything.
So, no people, Doyoung thinks as he pushes his chair away from his desk, something in his back clicking pleasantly as he stands up to stretch, looking out into the half warped blackness, half reflection of his window. That’s good, he can live without people, it’s not slightly depressing or anything. The universe, though, it seems doesn’t seem to have got the memo.
Because outside on the street, like some cruel twisted version of ‘Say Anything’, is a frankly disgustingly pretty guy, smoking in that stupid way that makes everyone around him know that, yes, he does know the health repercussion so it's his own ‘edgy’ choice and while Doyoung tries not to make a habit of hating strangers he thinks he's alright to hate this one. Vehemently. He’s loitering , and while even thinking the word makes him feel like a suburban middle class old lady, it’s the right word for it. He’s just standing there looking annoying, and smug, and hot, and thinking he’s cool.
And maybe Doyoung’s slightly jealous but that’s his own fucking business, okay.
His is very attractive though, and maybe that’s what makes Doyoung so angry. He’s a little familiar - maybe he goes to his school? It’s a big cohort, he reasons, and Doyoung is very good a ignoring people. Then again, Doyoung would hope he remembers a guy with a face like that - all strong jawlines and pretty eyes and lips that again, also look incredibly pretty even from a few metres away. Doyoung isn’t even wearing his glasses and he can see it, he’s that obnoxiously attractive.
It’s like he’s stepped out of Doyoung’s head, like he’s not real - and then Doyoung wishes he could be not real, because the stranger’s eyes meet his through the glass. There’s an endless second of eye contact and Doyoung can feel his cheeks heating up. Doyoung has no choice but to watch as the stranger takes his cigarette from between his lips and gives it an almost mockingly salutatory wave. The heat in his cheeks seems to burn as he whisks the curtain shut with an under-satisfying swish.
The need for something more carries him over to his door, letting it slam shut behind him as he heads downstairs. His parents are sat idly chatting over the television when Doyoung enters the living room. They don't say anything to him directly, but the sound of other people fills up a cavity in his chest. Doyoung feels the tension in his jaw that he hadn't realised was there start to loosen. He feels a bit more himself and it makes him feel a bit vindictively satisfied. The stranger can go fuck himself.
His stomach vibrates and he pulls his phone out from his hoodie pocket.
~
19:48 - courtroom #1
juror #1: yew w h at
king clown: you ever create a whole life story for people you see once and then they have an Effect of your life
juror #1: i repeat.. yew w h a t
king clown: nvm
anime betrayals: go be a nerd somewhere else doyoung
king clown: you go be a weeb somewhere else
lesbian icon: hey ten?
juror #1: yeah?
anime betrayals: cant do that seeing as im not a fuckign Weeb
lesbian icon: you wanna fucking elope to iceland
king clown: sound like something a closet weeb would say
juror #1: they finally pushed you off the edge huh
lesbian icon: i was already over the edge, they just stomped on my fingertips when i was clinging on
anime betrayals: what are you on the edge of
king clown: the world
anime betrayals: isnt it king of the world
juror #1: flat earthers or leonardo dicaprio and his sexy, sexy titanic: choose your fighter
lesbian icon: are you saying you find the titanic, as in the big fuck off boat, sexy?
king clown: size queen
juror #1: fucking fuck off
anime betrayals: lmao
anime betrayals: but forreal
juror #1: for real,, what?
anime betrayals: idk forreal
king clown: ,, dont distract me with your nonsense i have no idea what you mean and i dont care
king clown: ten are you tryna fuck the boat or not
juror #1: [redacted]
lesbian icon: dude,,,
anime betrayals set juror #1’s nickname as ‘boat fucker’
boat fucker: i meant leo but if it gets yall this mad sure mm propellers so sexi
lesbian icon: ,,, he doesnt even know anything about boats
anime betrayals: fake fan
king clown: fake fucker
boat fucker: isnt that you tho cause like,,,,,, you aint fucking
lesbian icon: doyoung’s alternate identity - fake fucker: the wanking wonder
anime betrayals: wanking wonder askdsdjkj
king clown: i’ll kill you all
boat fucker: get on with it then
lesbian icon: yeah get on with it
king clown: patience is a virtue
anime betrayals: and france is bacon
~
“Jaehyun, dude - are you even listening?”
“Not really,” Jaehyun smiles, looking up from his phone into Renjun’s severely unimpressed face.
“Here I am shouting over this fucking music for you and you’re not even fucking paying attention.”
“To be fair, you complaining is not that interesting,” Donghyuck says, eyes bright in the dimness. Jaehyun hadn't realised he'd gotten back from getting himself a drink.
“Fuck you, you weren't listening either,” Renjun accuses, “I deserve better friends.”
“Then go forth and take your pick,” Donghyuck smirks with a grandiose gesture towards the rest of the room, filled with various groups talking in clusters.
“You know what maybe I fucking will,” Renjun says, eyes narrowing as he looks at something over Jaehyun's shoulder, “Mark looks as though he could do with some help.”
Jaehyun twists his head round to see Mark smiling uncomfortably as he’s caught between the wall and a group of girls, fiddling with the label on his beer bottle nervously.
“Are you gonna help him?”
“And stop watching him attempt to interact with human beings? I’m legally obliged not to.”
“He’d still be interacting with human beings if he was talking to you though, Renjun,” Jaemin points out.
“Who says I’m human?”
“Wow, edgy,” Jaehyun says flatly, getting to his feet.
“Are we human or are we dancer,” Sicheng says holding down a smile as his drinks from his cup.
“It’s been eighty four years and I still don’t know what that means,” Jungwoo sighs.
“It’s very simple,” Donghyuck says seriously, “are we human, or are we dancer.”
“Don’t expect me to make a decision, I’m bi,” Renjun snaps back.
“And I’m leaving,” Jaehyun says, “see you in a bit, lads.”
“You’re not gonna go and help Mark, are you?” Donghyuck groans, “oh, you are - I hate you both, go away.”
“That’s the plan,” shouts over his shoulder, unsure if Donghyuck actually heard him because he’s already focused his attention on mocking Jungwoo’s choice of drink or something. Jaehyun makes a beeline for Mark, wincing as he hears his friend’s hiccuping laugh that means he’s either getting hammered or very uncomfortable. Or both. Probably both.
“Hey Jaehyun!” comes a loud voice from behind him and Jaehyun spins around, nearly spilling his drink on Yeri, “have you seen Jungwoo anywhere?” shouts a grinning, likely smashed Lucas.
“Yeah, he’s just over-” Jaehyun turns to point over at where he left his friends, but stops as he realises Jungwoo is no longer sitting with them, “shit, he was over there. Sorry, mate.”
“Nah, no worries, I’ve been looking for him for a while,” Lucas smiles easily, “I’m starting to think he doesn’t want to talk to me,” Lucas’s laugh is loud and inviting but seems hollow.
“I’m sure he’s just talking to people - you’ll find him soon enough,” Jaehyun says trying to clap him on the shoulder in a comforting way without spilling either of their beers.
“Cheers anyway mate,” Lucas smiles ruefully, until his attention is caught by something behind Jaehyun.
“No problem,” Jaehyun replies, about to return to his Mark-saving mission because now Mark’s jacket is being used by some guy as a scarf and Mark’s beer has been replaced by a shot glass - but Lucas swings an arm around his shoulders.
“Hey- hey, Jungeun!” Lucas says, which is more like a shout in Jaehyun’s ear, “You know Jungeun right?”
“Yeah, sure - I mean I know of her,” Jaehyun responds - he knows she’s in their year, and they might’ve had biology together in year 10.
“Aha just you wait, man, you’re gonna thank me for this,” Lucas grins, smile back to its kilowatt strength as he flaps his arm in a way that might be a beckoning motion.
“Oh yeah?” Jaehyun laughs.
“What the fuck, Lucas,” says Jungeun when she reaches them, “what are you being so loud for?”
“Jungeun, have you met Jaehyun?” Lucas says, using a voice that Jaehyun thinks is supposed to be smooth. Jungeun snorts.
“Well yeah we’ve been going to the same school for 6 years - but Mr Lee’s R.E. class, right?” Jungeun smiles, meeting Jaehyun’s eye finally and he feels his mouth go a little dry, “can’t say I miss it. No offense.”
“None taken,” Jaehyun replies, “GCSEs are why I drink.”
“I’ll drink to that,” Jungeun grins, holding out her bottle, which Jaehyun clinks his against obligingly, “with A levels I’ll drink to most things.”
“What they don’t tell you is the A stands for alcohol.”
“If it is then I’m an A* student.”
“If only there was a practical exam,” Jaehyun laughs.
“Instead of asking if you’ve got a calculator they just hand out chasers.”
“The physics paper is a Jagerbomb.”
“Maybe then I would have passed,” Jungeun grins, “wanna do some physics revision?”
“That might be the weirdest way anyone’s asked me to do Jagerbombs - but sure.”
“Come on then, I think I saw Rajani’s mum chuck a load of shot glasses in the kitchen,” Jungeun says, scrunching her nose a little.
“She chucked them? Was it a full on yeet?”
“I’m going to do you a favour and assume that not your first beer,” she says, rolling her eyes - but she doesn’t let go of his sleeve until they reach the kitchen. It's quieter here, Jaehyun notices, and Jungeun’s blonde hair shines in the glare of the bright kitchen lights.
“Thanks, you’re very kind.”
“I try,” Jungeun grins, picking a shot glass up off the counter, “so - you ready?”
~
19:54
yong: hey
yong: mums out
yong: come over?
yong: x
il: omw
il: x
~
Even that tiny, barely there message, sends a shiver straight down Taeyong’s spine. Perhaps by now (i.e. after actual months of his and Taeil’s agreement ) he should try to be a little more aloof and a bit less thirsty but honestly? Who is he trying to kid?
He lets his phone slip from his hands onto his bed and sighs. The waiting is always the worst part. It’s never very long, Taeil always arrives as fast as he can, which Taeyong can’t deny makes him feel sort of fluttery and a little bit powerful. But even so, he already feels a bit on edge and electric, and Taeil’s not even here.
But Taeyong’s feeling something, nervous, excited, Taeil-feelings that he guess only really occur when you’re about to fuck your best friend who you’re also in love with. It’s like pre-first kiss feelings but worse and it happens every damn time. So rather than having a second meltdown this evening, he busies himself drawing the curtains, then un-drawing them because it looks weird, before redrawing them again, and then straightening out every wrinkle in their bed sheets which is possibly the most pointless thing he’s ever do seeing as he and Taeil are about to heavily utilise them in a very aggressive way.
Just say sex , says a voice in the back of his head that sounds like Yuta. Gross.
On the bed his phone flashes and vibrates, just as the clunky chime of the doorbell rings out. His pulse is already thundering as he walks down the stairs to front door, and it’s only made worse when he opens to door to a sheepishly smiling Taeil in the same zip-up navy hoodie he always wears on Chemistry test days and a pair of worn grey sweats - the kind of look that would appear on Johnny in Ten’s snapchat with a comment about him being ‘boyfriend goals xoxo’.
“Hey,” says Taeil voice low and a little breathless. The light from the house spills out onto his face and catches on a droplet running down to his jawline, “sorry I took so long, I’d only just got out the shower when I got your message.”
“It's fine,” Taeyong says trying not to sound too strangled because Taeil's hair is slicked back from his face with it's post shower wetness and it's really fucking sexy, “just come in - make yourself at home.”
“Thank you, your hosting skills are beyond compare,” Taeil laughs and Taeyong knows he's joking but it makes his stomach twist pleasantly as he steps across the threshold, slinging the bag on his shoulder to the floor. Is he planning on staying the night? Taeyong hopes so, holy shit.
Then Taeil is far too close to his face.
“Would you like a drink?” he breathes, trying not to melt into the warmth of Taeil's hand pressing heavily at the top of his ass.
“I’m good, actually,” Taeil murmurs, “thanks, but no thanks.” As he speaks, Taeyong feels Taeil’s breath on his own lips - a teasing, pressureless pressure, a nearly kiss. As always Taeyong the first to break, surging forward to meet Taeil’s lips, still smiling.
~
20:24 - courtroom #1
king clown: not sure if yuta is dumb or making a joke
anime betrayals: FFS why is it so hard to believe im funny
lesbian icon:....
lesbian icon: so guys what are we up to tonight
king clown: watching strictly with the parents lmao
anime betrayals: omg twinsies
king clown: die
anime betrayals: :((
lesbian icon: hey guys lets all keep it light and breezy
king clown: said like a coward
lesbian icon: i’ll be a coward any day
boat fucker: im breaking up with you
lesbian icon: bABE
boat fucker: dont fucking quote doctor who like that then
anime betrayals: i dont think this is a healthy relationship
lesbian icon: says the man stalking a waitrose employee
king clown: yes yes you’re all awful human beings well done
boat fucker: and you’re not??
king clown: uh yeah. I’m lovely
lesbian icon: o k a y
anime betrayals: in your gay and stupid dreams
boat fucker: sdjfkjfd sure jan
king clown: alright guess ten is walking to school on monday xox
boat fucker: UGH fine
boat fucker: doyoung ur so Nice and Great
king clown: thats more like it
anime betrayals: when god gave doyoung the ability to be a gay who can drive he unleashed something terrible
lesbian icon: very patrinormative of you there yuta but o kay
anime betrayals: patri who now
boat fucker: isnt that the thing you use in biology for bacteria and shit
king clown: you’re thinking of petri dish. patrinormative is the wife of the president behind the watergate scandal
lesbian icon: ,,,thats pat nixon. patrinormative is the disease my uncle got after eating some shitty crab on holiday that gave him like a flatworm or smth
king clown: you’re thinking of paragonimia(?) i think and now i know more about your uncle than i ever wanted to and my parent are going to think i want to be a doctor next time they check my search history so thanks for that :)) but patrinormative is what happens when you see ghosts
boat fucker: your parents check ur search history? Lol i’d die
king clown: just gotta delete the gay away bois
anime betrayals: that sounds,,, exhausting
king clown: better that than being outed by a ‘how gay are you’ buzzfeed quiz lol
lesbian icon: I feel like we're being low-key serious here so I just want to say you were thinking of paranormal, patrinormative is ideas consolidating a patriarchal view of society
anime betrayals: THANK YOU
boat fucker: oi oi simmer down it's late no need to shout
king clown: what do you mean serious lol this is nothing important lol
anime betrayals: note to self - doyoung uses increasing lols when Pressed
king clown: I'll block you
lesbian icon: you know tho that you shouldn't have to hide ur search history from ur parents likes that tho the fact they're even looking is super invasive
king clown: dw they havent done it in a While its only if they get super worried about my Mental Health
king clown: one day I'll come out and then they'll be too scared to go near my search history
boat fucker: didnt you say you want to come out on your wedding day for the #drama
anime betrayals: omg really??
king clown: lmao no but wouldnt it be funny
king clown: like mendelson is playing
king clown: my grandma has a hat bigger than my head
lesbian icon: woah thats saying something
king clown: die
king clown: the little kids come out with the confetti
king clown: and then BAM my very sexy very male fiance comes down the aisle
boat fucker: i mean
boat fucker: it certainly is a plan
lesbian icon: for this to work however you are going to need one thing
king clown: whats that
lesbian icon: a boyfriend
king clown: what and be gross like you lot no ta
anime betrayals: !!!
anime betrayals: #getdoyoungaboyfriend
boat fucker: ^ retweet
king clown: i’ll pass thanks
lesbian icon: how come ur ready to plan our wedding and you’ll encourage yutas waitrose boy fetish
lesbian icon: pLUS you complain abt being lonely all the time
anime betrayals: whyd ya put it like that man
lesbian icon: s’true innit
king clown: not All the time,,,,
boat fucker: you do tho :/
king clown: doesnt mean am looking for a relationship tho does it
anime betrayals: what, u gonna fuck em an chuck em
boat fucker: dine and dash ;)
king clown: ur disgusting
boat fucker: maybe but im also getting dick so like
lesbian icon: ,,anyway
lesbian icon: why dont u want a boyfriend ;((
king clown: idk emotions are gross. School is stressful. We’re far too young now to have a relationship thats going to last in the long run so whats the point
king clown: no offense
boat fucker: lol cheers
lesbian icon: lmao
anime betrayals: you’re like
anime betrayals: not wrong
anime betrayals: but you’re not right either
king clown: confused as to whether to be offended or not,,,
boat fucker: when do you ever take the option to not be offended by something
king clown: rude
anime betrayals: like yeah we’re young and maybe it wont last but you’ll enjoy it while it does last yknow? And who fucking knows, like all the old people got married when they were like 17 so who knows, maybe you’ll find true love lol
anime betrayals: its okay to not date or whatever tho like societal expectations dont mean shit but like - you complain abt being lonely. A lot
anime betrayals: idk just want you to be happy bro
king clown: i didnt know you could spell societal expectations
anime betrayals: …..
boat fucker: AKDJSHDJSHD
lesbian icon: smh
king clown: thanks tho like
king clown: thanks
anime betrayals: no problem
boat fucker renamed the group ‘free therapy’
lesbian icon: i mean fair enough who doesnt need therapy after you realise taeyong and taeil left the chat at the same time and are probably doing disgusting things to each other
king clown: why is this anti-doyoung night first you bully me for being single now you make me think about taeyong’s penis...
lesbian icon: new mission: get doyoung a fuck buddy so he stops complaining
king clown: ...i’ll take it
boat fucker: wbk
king clown removed boat fucker from the group
anime betrayals: lmao fairs
lesbian icon added Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul to the group
anime betrayals: lmao i nearly forgot boat fucker was u ten lol
Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul set their nickname as ‘ten’
ten: good one
lesbian icon: tbf the nicknames r a bit mad
king clown: if you’re thinking of getting out of being a lesbian icon johannes you can think again
ten: plot twist: he can’t think. None of us can. We’re in the matrix
anime betrayals: honestly thats the Dream beam me tf up scotty
king clown: @god give me a fucking break
lesbian icon: there are no breaks
ten: does that mean we’re crashing?
anime betrayals: yeah if doyoung’s driving
king clown: don’t need to drive when you’ve already driven me up the fucking wall
anime betrayals: wow thats a new one
anime betrayals: doyoung now has not only the drinking habits, driving style and nightlife of a 40 year old woman - he also has the sense of humour of one
king clown: how many braincells did you sacrifice to satan to think of that one
ten: satan’s a bit strong
king clown: *saten
anime betrayals: none but im buying him lunch
lesbian icon: lol u were played
anime betrayals: :(((((
ten: we all die you either play yourself or get played
king clown: ,,,,,,,,,
king clown: i think thats all for tonight folks
king clown has left the group
~
“Hey,” Taeil says softly and a little awkwardly as he comes to settle behind Taeyong. He presses a kiss to his shoulder, “you good?”
“Yeah,” Taeyong breathes, “sticky.” Taeil laughs.
“Ah yeah, you still have your wipes right?” Taeil asks, already opening the top draw of his bedside table, pulling them out before Taeyong can answer.
“Yeah,” Taeyong says needlessly, because otherwise he’s never going to stop looking at Taeil and thinking that if they were together now would be the time when Taeil would be kissing him softly and holding him close and talking about stupid things and he wants that so much. So instead of thinking about it he takes the wipes from Taeil’s offering hand, wincing at the cool chemical sensation on his skin as he cleans his stomach, and instead of pulling him close and tangling their legs together so they can just lie there and enjoy each other’s company, he just watches Taeil’s brow furrow as he tries to wipe the come off the sheets.
“I think we might need to change your bed.” Taeyong laughs.
“No shit.”
“I’m trying my best, okay,” Taeil smiles, “look, if you wanna go take a shower, I can, like, take the covers off.” Taeyong feels his mouth go dry.
“Thanks,” Taeyong says, “that sounds good,” and he lets himself run his hand over Taeil’s hair as he leaves. Taeil captures his hand and smiles, bringing the heel of Taeyong’s palm to his lips and pressing a soft kiss there. Taeyong’s stomach flips and suddenly he feels very tired as he forces a quick smile, pulling his hand away.
He doesn’t cry in the shower, but it’s a close thing when he returns to his room, and sees his bed remade with Taeil sat at his desk, redressed and reading through a text book. Taeyong wants to go over and sit in his lap, kiss his forehead, hold his hand, anything . He turns away and tries to find some underwear.
“Hey,” Taeil says as Taeyong begins to dress, “is it good if I do some papers while we watch what we’re gonna watch?”
“Yeah sure,” is Taeyong’s reply and he feels a wave of sympathy for his friend - A Levels are already tough and Taeil’s really has a rough combination. At least he can help Taeil de-stress a little with their... Thing.
“Thanks, you’re the best.”
~
“Have you seen Mark Lee anywhere?" Donghyuck says to a couple of girls in the kitchen he semi recognises - maybe they're in year 13. Or he's drunker than he thought. He hopes its not the latter.
"Who?" One of them says, "sorry, no"
"Nevermind. Thanks." Fucking Mark Lee. Fucking stupid, beautiful idiot. Donghyuck can feel a headache coming on already.
The frustrating thing is, Donghyuck has been able to keep an eye on him all night, or at least an ear, despite his best efforts, and now that he want to find him of course he's fucking disappeared. Typical.
Donghyuck checks his phone. A billion texts from the group chat, five from Jaemin, one from his sister, and none from Mark Lee. If Mark has lost his phone again Donghyuck may have to actually kill him.
He'd serve the prison sentence as well. Enjoying every last moment.
“Hyuck! Hyuck! Hyuckie!” Donghyuk breathes a sigh of relief as he feels a familiar weight throw itself onto his back.
“Oi, get off,” he grumbles, because Mark is a dick, “where the fuck have you been?”
“I was looking for you!” Mark shouts - he’s a loud drunk, another thing to add to the list of annoying things about Mark, “I went down to the bottom of the garden, and I checked all the bathrooms but I couldn’t find you.” He looks crestfallen. It’s cute.
“Hey Mark, Hyuck,” comes a shout from Lucas, sticking his head out into the hallway, “you wanna play beer pong?”
“Oh shit, yeah!” Mark grins, “We’re so good at that shit - like, I’m aces.” Donghyuck has to restrain the urge to just throw Mark to the ground.
“Yeah, no,” Donghyuck sighs, pulling Mark’s arm around his shoulder, “maybe next time Lucas, sorry mate - let’s go.”
“Okay,” Mark says smiling, “goodbye everyone!” he shouts over Donghyuck’s shoulder, not noticing Donghyuck’s hands pressing gently at his pockets, making sure he feels the weight of Mark’s phone, before they begin their walk home.
The cold air is somewhat sobering, though the wind has calmed down a bit. Its peaceful, the dark blue night, lit with pools of orange light pollution. Romantic almost, says a traitorous little voice that’s been haunting him since year 10. Almost like you’re walking home after a date, it carries on.
Then Mark falls off the curb.
“Ow,” he says, blinking owlishly at his palms before looking up at Hyuck helplessly, eyes glossy and so, so pretty.
“You idiot,” Hyuck laughs, “come on, up you get you clumsy fuck.”
“Don’t be mean to me I’m hurt,” Mark whines, “I need looking after.”
“Tough shit,” Hyuck shrugs but he wraps his arm round Mark’s waist more securely now, guiding him as well as supporting him. He smells like beer and the same fabric softener his mum’s been using since they were kids and Hyuck feels his stomach swoop.
“I’m hungry.”
“Tougher shit.”
“Shit, dude, I could have a sandwich right now,” Mark rambles, “like, holy shit, I could demolish a sandwich.”
“Then buy one.”
“Oh shit,” Mark says, “Can we go Subway?”
“What the fuck?” Hyuck laughs, “Are you fucking okay?”
“Remember when we used to go to Subway afterfootball,” Mark sighs, “good times, good times.”
Hyuck does remember - and they we’re in fact good times. His mum still has a picture of them grinning around mouthfuls of sandwich still in their football kits pinned to the fridge. It’s a nice picture, a reminder that things used to be less complicated.
“I remember your fucking brainwave about getting one sandwich between both of us.”
“It was smarter okay! Why pay for two 6 inches when a foot long is less for the same sandwich!” Mark protests, wild hand gesticulations nearly making him lose balance again.
“Because we'd spend hours arguing over what to put in it.”
“Hey, we only got shouted at by the serve people once.”
“Do you mean sandwich artists?” Mark pulls a face.
“I never mean sandwich artists.”
Donghyuck lets out an echoing laugh, “actually, we didn't argue in Subway - you didn't want to get looks so you make us go and sit in the park until we figured it out”
“Rock, Paper, Scissors works better outdoors, okay!”
“Whatever Mark Lee”, Donghyuck says, rolling his eyes, “just know I’ll never forgive you for that tuna meatball sub.”
“Aha okay yeah I admit that one,” Mark says nearly stumbling off the pavement, “that was a bad call.”
“You’re a bad call,” Hyuck mutters on reflex, letting Mark rest his head back on his shoulder, “you’re heavy.”
“Thanks,” Mark smiles, looking sleepy and happy and very, very kissable. Fuck. “You’re pretty too.”
“Not what I said,” Donghyuck snorts.
“Oh,” Mark replies, brows forming into a frown, “well, it’s still true.”
“Shut up.”
“I mean it though,” Mark says and Hyuck tries to force himself to tune it out, “you’re so pretty, like your face is unreal, mate.”
“I didn’t know alcohol made you blind - what were you drinking again?”
“Hey, don’t be mean when I’m being nice,” Mark whines, “s’your fault for being pretty.”
“Well, I’m sorry,” Donghyuck tries to joke but he can feel a twist in the bottom of his stomach.
“You should be,” Mark mumbles sagely, “makes things strange.”
“Strange?” Donghyuck’s mouth feels numb and fifty miles away from his brain. He can feel his heart beating in his neck and he feels like he’s going to be sick - Mark can’t be saying what Hyuck wants him to be saying, he can’t.
“Yeah. ‘Cause you’re my best friend. Am not supposed to like you so much - am I?”
Donghyuck is great at saying things. Funny things in particular. He’s quite proud of his ability of always having something to say. Trust fucking Mark Lee to ruin that too. And the silence has never been more deafening.
“I do though,” Mark says quietly, “I like you so much.” And that’s all the warning he gets before Mark kisses him.
It’s a hard press off lips and his sort of on the side of Donghyuck’s mouth as Mark just twists in Donghyuck’s grip to reach him, but sends burning static through Donghyuck’s body. Mark’s lips feel smooth and warm and perfect and then they’re gone.
“M’sorry,” Mark says pulling away, rolling his head back onto Donghyuck’s shoulder.
“You’re drunk,” Donghyuck states quietly.
“Yeah,” Mark sighs.
“Let’s go home.”
“Yeah.”
Donghyuck feels like the silence is eating him alive.
“Hey,” he says to Mark, poking him in the side, “do you think we can convince Jaemin tomorrow that he promised to buy everyone Chinese?”
“Can we make it Subway?”
Donghyuck’s laugh is mostly forced but it makes Mark smile again.
*
01:07
lesbian icon: dk what time you kids r gona see this but i hope u lot had fun