Chapter Text
Jeon Jungkook visits Namjoon the following day. He was also supposed to discuss about their new single, but the flow of the conversation is disrupted, after hearing three knocks on the door. Namjoon glanced at the wall clock; it was time for your routinely walk. To his dismay, it wasn’t you who entered the room.
“Hello, Namjoon-ssi," Nurse Taehyung greets. Namjoon doesn’t hide the disappointed on his face, but it’s Taehyung who sighs first. “She’s on leave.”
“Who’s she?” Jungkook inquires.
Namjoon simply smiles at the boy despite feeling downhearted at the situation.
Taehyung shakes his head at this, muttering, “I don’t who among you two is more stupid…”
Surprisingly, Jungkook hears this, and exclaims, “Are you talking about me and hyung?”
“Your hyung, yes. But definitely not you.”
Jungkook puffs loudly. “Oh, really? Do you even know who you’re talking to right now?”
“Yes. I am perfectly aware. Quit the tough-guy image you’re trying to project. It doesn’t suit you, considering how you have too many “Jungkook as a bunny” videos online.”
“You…w-what?”
Taehyung then turns to Namjoon, ignoring the idol’s protests. “By the way, we just need to get one last set of x-rays, and we can discharge you.”
---
His things were already packed when Seokjin enters the room. “Kim Namjoon-ssi...”
“Doctor, I sincerely apologize for causing you trouble. I was supposed to talk to you about it soon—“
“Okay. Stop rambling. I already fixed the issue. It was a good thing Y/N approached me first.”
Namjoon suddenly looked pained at the mention of your name. Seokjin notices this, and can’t help but feel sympathy. “I think… there’s something you should know.”
---
He stood in front of the all-too familiar high-rise building, dressed in long, dark clothes, hair tucked in a baseball cap, facemask intact. He was easily allowed access to the place when the guard he had already made friends with recognized him.
“Do you need anything Namjoon? Should we send assistance for your luggage?”
“Hey Lee… I won’t be checking in tonight. Please do me a favor and don’t tell anyone about my arrival. I’m just gonna visit Yoongi-hyung. Is he here?”
Before Namjoon could knock, the door swings open, revealing the rapper in his cover-up clothes, phone in hand.
“Yeah, how many orders of tteokbokki? Is she okay? Did she explain why?” he asks, but he halts upon seeing Namjoon. “I’m sorry, I’m gonna have to get back to you… I’ll send someone else for the food…”
“Are you dating someone?” Namjoon wonders, his eyebrows raised in question.
“No. I was just supposed to go—wait, you’re out? Why didn’t you call me?”
“I… actually, we need to talk, Yoongi-hyung.”
“How did you find my apartment?”
“I brought you your favorite japchae.”
“How did you… how much do you know? Or rather, how much do you remember?” Yoongi asks.
---
You were curled into Jimin’s side, too emotional to care about how much your tears stained his shirt. In any other moment, it would just look as if you’re cuddling, but with how you cling to him for dear life proves otherwise.
He gently runs his fingers through your hair, the other hand rubbing circles on your back to provide you comfort. He does all he can to help you get rid of the pain, yet deep inside he knows he’s never gonna be the person to fully ease you.
You never really saw the pain in his own eyes; you never have, because he was so good at hiding it, and with what’s happening right now, you probably never will.
---
Namjoon knocks slowly at the door of your apartment. It has no peephole, so he doesn’t understand why the you don’t open it. Yoongi guaranteed that you would be home.
“Hi! Delivery?” he tries to call, a bad attempt in changing his voice, yet it was actually successful since the door opens.
“That was a quick—“Jimin starts, but upon seeing Namjoon, he almost slams the door shut.
“Jimin, wait—“ he pleads.
“Y/N is asleep now, so just come back tomorrow…”
“Jimin-ssi, please. I know you want this to work, too.”
(Does Jimin really?)
“Look, Y/N’s been through a lot. I’m not sure she if wants to see you. And like I said, she’s sleeping so I can’t ask her right now.”
“Y/N,” Namjoon calls, seeing your figure behind Jimin.
“Y/N?” Jimin turns to look at you. “What do you want me to do?”
You glance at Namjoon, then at Jimin, giving him a small smile. “I guess I could talk to him…”
“Are you sure?” Jimin walks to you with a concerned-filled expression.
You pull him into a quick hug. “Yeah… Thank you.”
“Call me if anything happens.” He picks up his bag from the couch, walking past Namjoon who was still at the doorway, giving him a threatening stare. “Don’t do anything stupid.”
Jimin had always been supportive of you getting back together with Namjoon, but after he found out how Namjoon lied to everyone about his amnesia, his demeanor and attitude towards him changed. Not to mention how broken he felt upon seeing you so hurt after the revelation.
The man only entered when you sat on the couch. He sat down on its other end.
“I’m actually surprised I’m not yelling at you to leave,” you start.
“Were you expecting me to come?” Namjoon replies.
You answer with silence.
“Y/N, I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have lied to you.”
You stare at the ceiling as the tears started to well up again.
“Y/N… please look at me?”
You didn’t need to look at him to know that he was crying as well.
“Y/N, I’m sorry I took advantage of the situation, but I know you did too.”
This snaps you out of your daze, confusion, or maybe anger, filling your chest.
“What?! Did the guys tell you something?!” You suddenly stood up, ready to storm out, but the quick motion makes you feel dizzy, and you almost fell if Namjoon hadn’t caught you.
“Y/N, please… Calm down, and let’s talk this over.”
After getting you a glass of water, he settles back on your couch, an appropriate distance between you two.
You take a deep breath before bringing it up. “Why did you fake your amnesia?”
“It wasn’t entirely fake, you know… I just didn’t tell you when it came back.” Namjoon looks down on his shoes.
“When did it come back?”
“Just a few hours after you saw me on the floor… That day.”
You run a hand through your hair, still looking bemused. “Do you even realize the effects of what you did? What if you kept that up? You’d mess with the hospital records, you’d give all of us more worries, and you could lose your entire career!”
“I know, okay? It was very selfish of me to do! But Y/N, I’d give up my fame and fans for you…”
These words tug your heartstrings. Yet, you were hesitant, shaking your head at him. You suddenly remember the tweets you saw online. There were a lot of concerned fans and co-artists.
“Namjoon… Go back to them… Go back to your fans.”
“I don’t want to,” he moves closer to hold your hand. “I don’t need them if I have you.”
“But they need you, Namjoon,” you pulls away. “They need you more than I do.” You turn your back on Namjoon, expecting him to leave.
This, you cannot understand. It was clearly your chance to have him back. You wanted this. But once again, fear takes over your mind.
Namjoon asks after a period of sad silence. “I thought you regret pushing me away? Why are you doing it again?”
“If you had your memories back, why didn’t you admit that you still love me?” you reply with a question. “Do you even realize how worried I was? I was so afraid you wouldn’t be okay. I was scared I couldn’t do anything for you! I just keep on hurting you, and that’s the last thing I ever want to do.” You don’t stop your tears from falling.
“Hey,” he speaks softly, turning your face towards his. “I was scared, too… At first, I thought that you changed. I was trying to see if you still felt something for me. I need you with me, Y/N.” He takes your hands in his. “You being my doctor was the best thing that ever happened to me since we broke up. It filled a huge hole in my heart, a hole I learned only you could fill. And the days I spent with you only proved that you still love me…”
It wasn’t clear who moved first, but what matters is that your soft lips met, slowly but surely, eager yet calm, in a way both of you absolutely missed.
You break apart when someone knocks on your door; the real delivery guy showed up.
After setting the tteokbokki, Namjoon reaches towards you, ready to pull you in for another kiss, but you stop him.
“I still didn’t say yes to… this.”
“Y/N…”
“Namjoon, I cannot help but think that I’m hindering you from your dreams. Look at your success for the past 5 years. You did all of that without me. And you can do well without me again.” You avert your gaze from him.
“Y/N, my dream wouldn’t be complete without you in it.”
He gently cups your face at this and your eyes met. Longing was clearly painted in his eyes, and you finally succumb to all your emotions, letting Namjoon close the gap.
When you break apart to properly breathe, you ask, “Do you think this—we—could work this out? I mean, I want to… I just… I don’t think I can bear losing you again…”
“Yes, of course. Let me take care of it.”
You suddenly remember the tweets complaining about your relationship with him. Anxiety fills your mind once more. “Your fans might not really like you having a girlfriend…”
“So we’re officially back together?”
You give him a blank stare.
“Hey, you’re my number one fan, right? And if they really love me, they would understand. All of my success and my fame was all thanks to you. You’re my inspiration, Y/N. Although they might get jealous, considering how much I love you.”
You chuckle at this. “Cheesy now, are we? Guess you had a lot of practice…”
“No, not at all. I couldn’t find anyone better than you anyway.”
“So you did try looking?”
“I didn’t have to. I already know that no one compares to you.”
You smile as he kisses your forehead.
---
Namjoon had a Vlive a few weeks later, greeting his fans, and apologizing for his long departure. He was answering a few questions, about his recovery, his plans, and his personal life.
“Who took your most recent photos and video?” he reads. They were probably talking about the tweets he posted. It was you who videoed him as you were biking by the river.
“Ha-ha. I don’t know if this is the right time to tell you about this… It might get controversial.” He chuckles.
You were eagerly watching his live as if you weren’t a door away from his studio.
“She’s someone special.”
The number of comments tripled at this, mostly asking who.
“I’ll tell you when we’re ready, yeah. You guys have to promise me first you’ll be nice to her… After all, she’s the reason behind my success…”
You were amused to see the positive feedback sent by viewers. It was obvious that Namjoon was satisfied, too.
“Anyway, I wrote a new song… For her. Featuring Yoongi-hyung, and my good friend Hoseok.”
You’re eyes widen at this. “You didn’t tell me about this...” you type.
Surprisingly, Namjoon reads your comment.
“Sorry, Love, it was gonna be a surprise. But since you watched the live, I guess it won’t be.”
You could practically hear the screaming of the fan girls in the comments.
---
“Her” was released exactly a week later. It was noticeable how light the beat and theme was. A lot of fans and critiques commended it, saying how it was really uplifting, and full of positive vibes, quite unlike his style, but the change was anything but negative.
You were streaming it when he knocks on your door and enters your apartment. He greets you with a back hug, and you melt into his touch.
“Did you like it?”
You turn around and plant a kiss on his cheek, dimples popping out as he smiles at you.
“Of course I did. Thank you, really.”
He was about to kiss you when you stopped him with your hand. “You don’t call me “Her”, though?”
He laughs lightheartedly at your remark. “Do you want me to?”