Chapter Text
It took another week before Peter was well enough to leave the medbay, his super healing having helped the process. He’d watched from his bed, as the world received the news that a spaceship had been sighted, how it had given the people hope that Ironman was back, and yet all it brought was news of his demise. Peter watched, helplessly, as the world shook from a loss a second time.
The world knew, Ironman was dead.
Now, though, wracked with anxiety, he stood in the presence of the surviving Avengers.
“We’ve been hunting Thanos now for three weeks now-”
“Do you have any idea, did he give you any clues, any coordinates?” Steve asked
“What happened up there-?”
The questions mostly flew over his head.
“I erm- I followed him up- we- we ran into some other people? Urm-”
“The Guardians.” Nebula cut in.
“Yeah um them- T-Tha-Thanos came for um- for the Wizards stone, necklace, thingy- and we- we fought- we- we almost had the gauntlet- I- I almost had it- It’s my fault- It’s all my fault-” Peter cut off, voice cracking towards the end, Steve put a reassuring hand on his shoulder.
“No- We failed too.”
“But how did you aid in such a fight?”
“I- I- urm, I’m Spiderman?” It came out with a question, which Peter didn’t mean to do.
“Queens?” Steve asked.
"Brooklyn," Peter nodded.
“ You-You’re like 12 .” Nat butted in.
“I’m 17.” Peter corrected.
“You’re practically a fetus-” Rocket added.
“I-I’m not!” Peter squeaked.
“Despite this, he is here, and we need him, we need all the help we can get-” Bruce admitted.
Hums of agreement rang true.
“But we don’t even know where Thanos is now,” Thor finally added.
“I do” Nebula spoke, and heads turned.
“Show us-”
The holographic map finally ended up displaying a planet looking slightly similar to Earth.
“Here, the Garden.”
“Right- I’m going then,” Carol declared.
And with that, the blonde space lady that had saved Peter was strutting out the room.
“Woah- Woah where you going?”
“To Kill Thanos.”
“Um wait a second-” Rhodey stared.
“Shouldn’t we work as a team, y’know, morals a little fragile?” Nat asked.
The blonde blinked in confusion.
“W-We- you guys need to work together…” Peter mumbled as the slight chaos.
Rhodey nodded.
“The Ki- He’s right.” Rhodey stopped himself from using the name, he’d not been blind to the flinch the last time he’d been called it, nor was he ignorant to Tony’s relationship with the vigilant.
Peter still flinched though, because he realized what Rhodey had been trying to say and it just slapped him in the face every time that Mr Stark was gone.
“Mh… well then what are we waiting for, let’s get him?” Carol asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Now? Right now?” Steve asked.
“Yes…?”
“Shouldn’t we discuss first? Draw up a plan, agree whose going? Someone needs to stay here, we can’t leave the Earth unprotected?”
“I- I’ll come-” Peter mumbled. The thought of going back up there terrified him, the thought of facing Thanos again terrified him. But the thought of doing nothing to help? That was even worse.
“Hey- no, no, you’ve been up there once too many times already.” Pepper butted in, having been keeping to the sides to monitor Peter.
“Exactly? I’ve already been up there once, a second time will be like a walk in the park-” Peter retaliated, unable to stop the shake in his voice.
“No. You’re not coming.” Steve decided.
A hum of agreement rang through nearly everyone.
“Why not? It’s- It’s my fault- let me come please- I’ve gotta fix it-” Peter gasped.
“It’s as much our fault as it if yours.” Bruce interrupted and a couple of nods occured.
“We need you to stay here, keep an eye on things, y’know?”
“Then it’s agreed? The rest of us go?”
Nods occurred, despite Peters weak protests.
“Let’s go get this son of a bitch-”
Peter felt sick.
Peter was left alone, once again. The feeling of being abandoned once again. Days. Weeks.
Why had everyone else gone and left him? Did they see what a hindrance he was? Did they realize he was probably going to ruin everything again?
“Peter, hun?” Pepper asked, entering the room he’d been given at the compound. The woman had been looking into the people he was close to, per his request, while they waited for everyone to return for space. If all went well, everyone would return any day now, but Peter didn’t want to wait, he wanted to know who he’d failed, who he had left after everyone else had deserted him.
Peter lifted his head from the web shooter he’d been fiddling with.
“I found a couple of the people you listed, they’re fine.. Well, as fine as any of us can be, but..”
“But?” Peter asked, gut churning.
“Your Aunt is among the list of missing…”
Peter couldn’t stop the noise he made. Maybe it was a sob? Or a choking sound? Honestly he didn’t know but it sounded like death.
His entire family was dead, he was the only one left. His parents, Uncle Ben, his Aunt May, even Tony- He was completely alone and oh God what was he going to do if they failed, if they couldn't get everyone back- would he be homeless- put into care?
“Ter- Peter- breathe-”
Everything sounded like he was underwater and he was drowning and nobody was there to help him and- and-
“Peter!”
He was in that lake again, struggling against the parachute, icy water freezing him to the bone- spiders couldn’t thermoregulate- he was going to die- he was dying- Mr Stark-
The warm hand against his back snapped him from everything, breath still coming out fast and sharp.
“Peter, are you with me?” Pepper asked, eyes teary and Peter could only manage a nod through his own tears.
“Wh-What will happen to me- I- I- there’s nobody left- please-”
“You’ve got me. I’m not going to leave you, Peter.” Pepper promised, one hand still rubbing soothing circles across the teens back, the other reaching to squeeze one of Peters hands reassuringly. He couldn’t help the loud sob as he curled forward against Pepper who held him against her.
“Shh, it’s okay, I promise, we’ll get through this, we’re going to get them back-”
Peter wasn’t sure how long he stayed against Pepper, relishing in the fact she made him feel safe, wanted, not alone- he’d drifted off, and when he woke she was still there, say beside him, even though it had surely been hours, because it was dark outside now-
“Ms Potts-”
“Pepper. You can call me Pepper.”
“P-Pepper-” The words felt awkward, wrong, he shouldn’t be allowed to be so familiar with the woman, after all he was responsible for the fact Tony was gone- how could she stand to be with him?
“Yes, Peter?”
“T-Thank you- for earlier- um- I’m sorry-”
“It’s fine, I understand. Tony- he- he had his fair share of panic attacks…”
Peter nodded dumbly, of course he did, he’d been through so much shit, the man just deserves some happiness, to marry Pepper and have a family and Peter could feel the tears once again.
Why was he being such an emotional wreck, he was meant to be Spiderman for God's sake.
“You.. from the list of people you gave me, we did manage to confirm a couple of them to be okay. I managed to drag up some information of where they’re staying, if you’d like I can get Happy to take you, tomorrow morning?”
Happy was okay? Peter hadn’t seen or heard from the man since he returned to Earth but Happy was okay? Peter actually kinda liked the grumpy individual and he felt a small wave of relief to hear.
“Wh-Who?”
“A Ned Leeds and Michelle Jones. By all accounts, Michelle’s parents didn’t survive and she’s taken residence with the remains of the Leeds family.”
Peter nodded. MJ, Ned, they were okay. He-
“Please- yes.”
Pepper nodded.
“Would you like something to eat? You slept through most of the day.”
Peter nodded, dragging himself from the bed, grateful he’d mostly made a full recovery from his malnourishment thanks to his super healing.
“Yeah..”
“Let’s go then.”
At least he had some good news.
Three hours later, the Avengers returned, and everybody snapped didn’t.
“He’d destroyed the stones.”
“Thanos is dead.”
Peter cried until he was sick.
The next morning, Peter didn’t go see Ned or MJ, he stayed tucked up alongside Pepper, as the news spread like wildfire that the Avengers had failed again, that nobody was coming back, they were doomed with live with only half of the population, without Ironman.
Within a month, the old Stark Tower had been overrun with tributes, for Ironman, for Tony, who’d died fighting for them.
Peter went with Pepper, hands clasped tightly to one another, in silence. They ignored the stares, this was Pepper Potts after all, she was the closest thing left to Tony Stark, with a boy nobody knew.
They stood, not for long, but it was enough, enough to cause Peter to sob quietly into her shoulder, enough for them both to appreciate how many lives Tony had touched, had once saved, how many people knew he was a hero.
That was all Peter could do now, keep the legacy of Tony alive, let as many people who’d listen know how brave he was, how much he’d done, and how much he’d lost.
“I- I can’t- can we- can we go?” Peter mumbled and Pepper nodded, against him, as they went back to Happy’s car.
Two days later, Peter simultaneously got the best and worst news of his life.
“I’m pregnant.”
Peter threw up.
He’d grown up without his parents, he’d never wish that on anyone else, even if Ben and May were amazing, and here he was, knowing that this poor kid was going to grow up without someone as Amazing as Tony Stark, without their father, because Peter had failed everyone.
That this kid was going to have to grow up knowing their father was a hero everyone knew, except them.
Pepper was adamant about keeping it, of course, despite the fact it wasn’t exactly the best environment to raise a child, the avengers had mostly vanished into air, Nat and Steve being the only ones to stay at the compound, the world was still trying to cope and sort things about, even though the snap had been nearly 3 months ago.
Plus there was still plenty of people who held disdain to the Stark name, who blamed Tony for everything because he was meant to protect earth and he hadn’t.
People did crazy things through anger and grief and the child of Tony Stark was the closest anyone could get to whatever sick form of revenge they had in mind.
Peter knew, as soon as the reality smacked him in the face that a part of Tony lived on, that he’d do anything to keep it safe, it was the least he could do.