Chapter Text
Chapter 7- I’m here for your love and I make my stand
It was eerie, watching Adam be so completely calm during the entire showdown with the four horsemen. He had been right, he knew exactly what to do. His friends had dispatched Pollution, Famine, and War seem like child’s play. It was literally child’s play! They’d used Aziraphale’s flaming sword for fuck’s sake. The very sword he’d given to humanity six thousand years ago, Adam had just used, to defend humanity. What. The. Fuck.
Crowley was still unwary though. It felt too easy. Far too easy. The witch had shown up and he’d been ready to go into a protective mode. However, with her being Adam’s friend too now, apparently, to help save the world she’d fucked the one person in the entire world who could shut down the threat of Nuclear Disaster faster than you can say Doctor Strangelove. And she was surprisingly chill when he gave the book back in less than perfect condition.
It was working!
Which is when, of course, there is when there was a blinding flash of lightning and a quaking from the ground.
Aziraphale grabbed Crowley’s hand tighter when Gabriel and Be’elzebub manifested. Perhaps if he had any sense of self preservation, he’d have let it go. That, of course, is not what he did.
Aziraphale tightened his hold on Crowley’s hand, reached down, and picked up his sword, gripping it tightly.
“Did you just fucking openly threaten our bosses with your sword?” Crowley hissed.
“I grabbed something to defend Adam’s life and yours,” Aziraphale whispered back.
“Don’t be ridiculous, if things go south, you take him and you run as fast and as far as you can.”
“Would you two please shut the fuck up?” Be’elzebub shouted. She was staring directly at them.
“Uhh- hello!” Aziraphale said with a nervous smile. “Lord Be’elzebub, Gabriel.”
“Shut the fuck up, Aziraphale,” Gabriel said, also completely unamused. Aziraphale could hear Crowley’s low hiss at that. Gabriel looked around the airbase furious. “Would someone please explain what just happened here? Why hasn’t armageddon begun?”
“I didn’t want it to,” Adam said. “Simple as that.” Aziraphale glanced at Crowley in abject horror. Adam may be the antichrist and have control over reality at present moment, but mouthing off to those two is incredibly stupid behavior. That sort of bravery was reserved for the adults in the room, not the eleven year old.
“The Adults are talking!” Gabriel snapped at Adam. Broken clocks. “So zip it you little shit.” Or not. Gabriel strode over to them. He glanced down at their joined hands in disgust. “You two cannot even begin to explain that .” He gestured to their linked hands like they were holding a rotting animal carcass. “So please, try to explain the rest of this.”
“It’s like Adam said, he didn’t want the world to end, so it didn’t,” Aziraphale said, drawing confidence from having Crowley’s support.
The glare Crowley shot him suggested he may be drawing too much support.
Be’elzebub had walked over to Adam, and from the way Crowley’s body tensed Aziraphale was grateful to have picked up his sword. “Adam, was it?” She asked all faux sweetness. One needn’t have raised Adam to see he could see right through the facade. “Come on if you go along with this you get to rule the world. You can do whatever you want. Anything at all.”
“Could they both survive?” Adam said looking to Crowley and himself. “It’s just, I’m quite fond of both of them, and I can’t imagine a world without them. Together.” Crowley and Aziraphale shared another pained look. Why was Adam being so recklessly brave? Was this because of the whole Gryffindor thing?
“You broke the antichrist!” Be’elzebub shouted turning back toward Crowley and Aziraphale. “How is that possible?”
Crowley shrugged. “No idea.” He shook his head. “Maybe that’s the problem with putting a literal child in charge?” Aziraphale shot him a pained look as apparently Adam wasn’t the only one being stupidly brave, but as he once said eleven years ago, in for a penny.
“Children never do what they’re told,” Aziraphale added quickly with a nod. “In fact-”
“Uh, uh uh,” Gabriel interrupted, holding one finger in the air. “This,” he said gesturing to their group of small children and a group of adults so varied Aziraphale rather thought was the start of an interesting joke. “All goes against the Great Plan. And we cannot tolerate that. The world must end.”
“Hey Adam,” Brian cut in. “Which one is the angel and which one is the demon? I don’t know who to point my squirt gun at.”
Gabriel wheeled around and stalked toward the rest of the Them. “I am the archangel fucking Gabriel and you little brats will not insult me that way.” Pepper shot her water gun at him.
“That’s going to make Christmas awkward,” Wensley said quietly.
The air crackled around Gabriel in a threatening manner. In a flash Aziraphale was standing between the children and Gabriel. “Aziraphale, move, these children need to be punished for their crimes.”
“We are angels, and they are children.” Aziraphale said, his sword sparking to life. “We’re supposed to be the good guys. Good guys don’t threaten children.”
“They do if they get in the way of the great plan,” Gabriel replied coolly.
“I’ve been thinking about that lately,” Aziraphale said, taking a step forward, forcing Gabriel to take a step back. “We all know about the Great Plan. But if the ineffable plan is truly ineffable how do we know the ineffable plan is the Great Plan?”
“That’s a great question Aziraphale,” Crowley shouted, drawing attention back to himself. “Lots of great questions floating around for millenia.”
Gabriel and Be’elzebub leveled him with an unamused glare. “This isn’t over,” Gabriel said. “Especially not for you, Crowley .”
“Relax, well call his father,” Be’elzebub said with a nod. “He’ll take care of it.”
And then they were gone.
Adam swallowed nervously. No wonder Dad and Pop has both agreed to give up their loyalties and raise him. Even if Adam had been pure evil, it would still seem better than what they’d been dealing with. He was confused by what they had said though. ‘His father’. He had two parents. They were right here, with him.
Just as Adam opened his mouth about to ask Pop what they meant by that when Pop fell to the ground, hard. The ground was trembling now, Adam could feel it. Dad seemed a little more steady as well but everyone else seemed fine.
“Oh Fuck!,” Pop was shouting now in a panic. He was writhing on the ground in pain. “Aziraphale! We’ve got a big fucking problem.”
“What’s happening?” Adam asked as he stumbled over to Pop, trying to check on him. “I thought this was over.”
“Armageddon is, don’t worry,” Pop said through gritted teeth. “This is personal.”
“What?”
The rumbling grew louder and louder and then suddenly, bursting forth from the ground was Satan himself. Oh. That father . Dad was there now, his sword still in his hand, and still on fire. “What do we do Crowley?”
“How the heaven should I know you’re the plan man!” Pop shouted back. “Look just take Adam and run like I said, Alpha Centauri is lovely this time of year. Should be for a century or two. You’ll be safe.”
“I. Am. Not. Abandoning. You. To. Die.” Adam shouted over the chaos Satan's presence was causing he grabbed Pop by his scarf. “Either of you!” He turned his head to Dad. “So don’t you get any ideas either.”
“So then what do we do?” Aziraphale shouted.
Adam closed his eyes, any sense of how to prevent Armageddon had ended when Armageddon had been prevented. He couldn’t think of an idea. Dozens of half formed thoughts flew around his head but the overwhelming thought was “Danger!”
Satan took another step toward them Dad put himself between Satan and Their family. “Crowley we need an idea. Now.”
Pop forced himself to standing and snapped his fingers. Wind and the familiar feel of Pop’s magic rushed around Adam and when he opened his eyes he was in the desert. Dad and Pop were both there as well, wings out and looking better and cleaner than they did at the airbase.
“Pop, what did you do?” Adam asked.
“Stopped time, pocket dimension,” Pop answered clearly concentrating on maintaining this space. “It won’t hold forever, but I-“ his face fell into sadness. “I just wanted more time.” He fell back to his knees and looked up at them both, tears threatening to form. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted for us, for you. More time.”
“You’ve given it to us love, thank you,” Dad said gently.
“I-I still don’t know what to do,” Adam confessed walking over to them both. “I don’t think I can fight him.” Adam feels tears begin to gather in the corners of his eyes. “I don’t want to lose you. Either of you.”
“You won’t,” Dad said placing his hand on Adam’s shoulder. “We’ve got you.”
“No matter what happens, you’ve always had us. You’ll always have us,” Pop said.
“You still can manipulate reality,” Dad said. “Maybe something?” He shrugged.
“Dads right. Reality is still yours to control, and you’re a lot stronger than either of us right now.”
Adam looked between his parents with a small smile, knowing this may be the last time he sees them as he basks in the moment. Wait. His parents. Adam’s eyes shot open. “I have an idea.”
“What?” Pop asked with a confused frown but he stood back up nonetheless, taking a battle pose.
“I have an idea, I think I can do this.”
“Adam, you’re sure?” Dad asked gently.
Adam nodded and turned around, grabbing Pop’s hand with his left hand and Dad’s with his right. “We can do this. I believe in us.” He looked at Pop with a small smile.
“Right then, hold on tight,” Pop worked his magic and they were stumbling back on the tarmac. Adam gave both of his parents hands one last affectionate squeeze and then let go.
“This is my disappointing son?” Satan asked, looking down at Adam both physically and metaphorically
“I’m not your son!” Adam shouted back. He reached into his pocket and gently held the bundle of feathers there for luck.
“What?” Satan snarled at him. “How dare you!?”
“Me? How dare me?” Adam shouted right back. “How dare you? Where the hell have you been?”
“Adam, have you lost your mind?” He heard Pop hiss behind him.
Adam wasn’t deterred. “Parents are there for you. A real father teaches you how to dance. A real father shows you all the coolest music and movies. A real father makes you breakfast, asks how your day went, helps you with everything, answers questions.” Adam took a step forward with each sentence. “A real father loves you no matter what and is there for you ‘til the end. You’re not my father. And I’m not your fucking son.”
Power flowed through Adam and around the celestial forces present. And then Satan was gone.
They had won.
Crowley’s head whipped back and forth from Adam, to Aziraphale, to the witch and her boyfriend in a Witchfinder jacket, to the other kids, to Dog, then to Sgt. Shadwell and Madame Tracey. He was trying to comprehend what exactly just happened. But he didn’t think he fully comprehended everything and if he were being perfectly honest, he wasn’t sure he wanted to. Boy wasn’t that a first?
Adam walked back toward them with a smile. And well, that was distraction enough from his own head and weird sensations that had settled over him. He wrapped his arms around Crowley. “I did it,” he said in disbelief. “It actually worked.”
“It did,” Crowley said wrapping an arm around Adam. “You-You said. To Lucifer. Satan himself.” he trailed off. “Nope I got nothing that’s family friendly. Which I’m sure Dad noticed by the way.”
“I think it can be forgiven this time,” Aziraphale said with a laugh. “Sometimes no other words can suffice.” Adam moved to hug him then and Aziraphale dropped his flaming sword. Perhaps he should pay better attention to it.
Crowley can’t think about it though, because they’re being rushed by Adam’s friends.
“You told Satan to fuck off!” Brian said, his voice filled with admiration. “That is the most amazing thing I have ever seen.”
“Actually, yes, this day just keeps getting cooler and cooler by the minute,” Wensleydale said with a shy smile.
Pepper had a wide grin. “Best. Saturday. Ever.”
“Ngk,” Crowley said, trying to come up with the words to convince the children this was not cool, or amazing, or whatever else they were thinking. But he couldn’t because he, somewhat reluctantly, agreed. He looked to Aziraphale for back up and the angel just shrugged. Great. Their collective conscience had taken a holiday.
“Umm,” Newt, the witch’s boy toy, hesitantly began. “Does anyone know how long these soldiers will be out for? I don’t particularly fancy saving the world from nuclear and supernatural destruction only to be shot by an angry American.”
“Not to worry laddie, I’ve got a finger,” Sgt. Shadwell said with a proud smile.
To his credit Newt merely nodded. “Right.”
“I think he’s got a point love,” Madame Tracey said with a small smile.
They moved as a group out of the base. The children picked up their bicycles and they slowly walked away from the airbase, no one running ahead, all adults shambling together in a daze. The children were gleeful, but they stayed close. Crowley was grateful, he didn’t want any angels or demons sneaking up on the children, he’d make sure they got into their homes safely.
“So, Mr. Crowley and the southern pansy?” He heard Shadwell ask, his voice thick with disbelief and not nearly as quietly as he thought he was being. “They’re-“
Madame Tracey sighed with infinite patience. “Yes, Mr. Shadwell.”
“I mean, southern pansy, that’s expected, but Mr. Crowley?”
Aziraphale grabbed Crowley’s hand and gave it a fond squeeze. They interlaced their fingers. Then a thought came back to Crowley, “Sgt. Shadwell, how do you know Aziraphale anyway?”
Adam tried, and failed, to contain a giggle. They’d have to work on his poker face. But they had time for that. Crowley smiled in spite of himself.
“Well, there are many supporters of the Witchfinder Army.”
“Wait, you employ the Witchfinder army?” Aziraphale asked, frowning with adorable confusion.
“I told you I have a team of human operatives, Angel,” Crowley says with a shrug. They both did, it wasn’t a concern.
“But they’re my human operatives.”
Crowley stops walking. “What.” Adam’s giggles have grown into a loud impossible to ignore laugh. “Are you telling me, we have both been paying the same person, to do the same job, for years?”
“At least since I was four,” Adam said, wiping tears from his eyes. “That I know of.”
“Wow,” Brian whispers under his breath.
“Are all supernatural beings this stupid?” Pepper asked.
Crowley and Aziraphale share a pained look. “It’s entirely possible,” Aziraphale admits.
“What’s really sad is that we may be the smartest ones,” Crowley adds with an involuntary shiver. The entire group hummed in agreement, having met the two head bosses for each side. Even Dog let out an agreeing little yap.
“We really came close to the end of the world didn’t we?” Anathema asked cautiously.
“But we didn’t!” Wensley replied.
“Too close for comfort,” Anathema mumbled.
“Right?” Crowley joked. He couldn’t take this conversation entirely sober any longer He imagined a bottle of Old Vine Zinfandel he’d been saving for a special occasion disappear from the wine fridge and appear in his hand, uncorked. He took a heavy sip and then passed the bottle to Aziraphale.
Aziraphale also took a long sip of the wine, but instead of passing it back to Crowley, he handed the bottle to Madame Tracey. “Thank you again, for the, uhh, lift,” Aziraphale said, a little shy.
“Oh, it was no trouble at all,” she said with a wave of her hand. “Besides, happy to do my part.” She sipped at the wine. “Ooh, that’s nice.”
Madame Tracey then passed it along to Sgt. Shadwell who really looked like he needed it the most. And in his defense, Crowley had to admit his worldview was probably the one most challenged by what had happened today, next, possibly, to Aziraphale’s own. He sipped it wordlessly and passed it on to Newt whispering. “I just shared wine with a demon.”
“And yet, strangely enough, not the strangest thing we’ll have done today,” Newt said with a shrug. After his sip he passed it to Anathema.
“I-I just. It was Adam. Adam was under my nose the entire time,” Anathema said with a confused frown of her own. “The whole time.”
“In your defense, Adam wasn’t supposed to be under your nose,” Crowley said in a tone Adam knew usually meant there would be hell to pay. Probably not this time, but in general.
“But you can’t say it didn’t help,” Adam said back, looking far too satisfied with himself.
Bless it, Adam was right. Crowley took the bottle of wine back from Anathema. “What? Why?” She asked confused.
By now Azirphale had conjured a bottle of his own which was also being passed around so Crowley took a sip for himself. “I mean no offense but a witch shows up close to Armageddon and we have no idea what side your playing for, or what you’re willing to do to prevent it.” Crowley took a sip. “Simple self preservation.”
“I’d never kill a kid!” Anathema said taking the bottle of wine back. “Though I do suppose you didn’t know that until just now.”
“Like I said, nothing personal.” Crowley stuck out his hand. “Water under the bridge?”
Anathema shook it.
Aziraphale pushed Adam’s bicycle forward as Crowley carried him on his back, Dog trailing faithfully behind. “This was easier to do when he was five,” Crowley grumbled quietly. Adam had begun to nod off when they dropped Pepper off at her home. And that had been their first stop. While Aziraphale and Crowley both knew Heaven and Hell were likely done with the rest of the Them, they’d felt better seeing them home to their parents personally.
“Yes, well, would you rather be bending over to push this,” Aziraphale asked knowing the answer was a firm ‘no.’
“Why am I so tired?” Adam mumbled, half awake. He rested his head on Crowley’s shoulder.
“Larger miracles require a lot more brain power,” Crowley explained. “And celestial power channels through you. Even you probably burned yourself out a little.”
“Only times I used to sleep before we got together was after official miracles,” Azriaphale agreed with a nod. “Removing the stone and all that? Napped for a day and a half.”
“Sucks though,” Adam said, barely keeping his eyes open. “It’s not even that late.”
“You saved the world,” Crowley explained as they turned onto Hogback lane. “You’re allowed to sleep for a long while, I think.”
Aziraphale put Adam’s bicycle in the garage and then fixed the back door as he entered. “What happened here?” He asked with a frown.
“Brian,” Adam mumbled.
Crowley and Aziraphale exchanged a confused look. Crowley slowly made his way up the stairs, but bypassed Adam’s room, heading straight for theirs. He gently laid Adam down in the center of the bed and Aziraphale miracled him into pajamas.
Once Aziraphale was convinced Adam was asleep for the night, he motioned to the hallway. Crowley followed. “I think there’s one last prophecy,” Aziraphale said. He handed the paper slip that had fallen out of Agnes Nutter’s book to Crowley.
Crowley cracked a grin reading it. “So does that mean Plan 37b wasn’t a complete waste of time?”
“I’m afraid so,” Aziraphale said fond, but tired.
“So that means?”
Aziraphale sighed. “You were right, I was wrong.”
Crowley hummed. “Angel.”
Aziraphale rolled his eyes. “Again.”
Adam woke up to being forcefully dragged out of bed. Literally. Before he could even register what was fully happening he felt himself manhandled onto the floor and toward the stairs. A woman in a grey suit and a bald man with metal in his teeth drug him by his arms. All of Adam’s thrashing and fighting didn’t faze them in the least. Neither did Dog’s bites to their ankles.
“Stop!” Adam shouted. “Let me go!” He dug his heels into the rug of the hallway. “Dad! Pop!”
“Look what we found,” the man sneered as they took him down the stairs, his legs thumping uselessly on every stair and then out the back door. “In their bed of sin.”
“Yes, their betrayals certainly know no bounds,” the woman said her voice eerily soft.
In the early morning sunlight Adam saw a sight that made his entire body freeze. Dad was in a similar position to himself, a redheaded woman had his left arm in her grip and behind his back and a pale man with black eyes had the other. The woman had sharp teeth she was baring at his dad, threatening to bite him. Pop was knelt down in the grass, his hands tied up behind his head in a surrender position. A shorter woman with short dark hair and in a suit stood behind him, pointing a holy water gun at the back of Pop’s head.
“It’s as you suspected. They’ve been raising the adversary as their own,” the woman holding Adam explained to the assembled angels and demons.
“I told you!” The blonde man shaped demon crowed. “I told you Crowley had a child!”
“Unbelievable,” The man in the grey suit from yesterday, Gabriel, said with a shake of his head. “This goes against so many laws of Heaven and Hell I can’t even begin to speculate why you thought this was acceptable or how you’d get away with this.”
Before anyone could respond Dog darted out from the house, running around various demons and angels trying to be intimidating.
“That’s the hellhound?” Beelzebub snarled. She turned to face Pop. “Is this some kind of sick joke to you?”
“Really wish it was,” Pop replied. Beelzebub stormed over to where Pop was knelt, and kicked him in the gut, causing him to double over. Adam could see Dad surge forward, trying to break the grip on him and get to Pop, but he couldn’t, they were both too strong. Then the blonde man twisted the arm in his grasp, causing Dad to cry out.
Adam sobbed as he shook his whole body trying to get out of the hold he was in. The woman who had his arm wrapped both of her hands around the back of his head, her fingernails digging into the skin of his cheeks, forcing him into a position in the yard where he could see both of his parents.She kept his head perfectly still.
Gabriel, walked into the center of the triangle and gripped Dog by his scruff, lifting him high into the air. “This is truly pathetic,” he said, his voice dripping with disgust as he regarded Dog. He motioned toward Beelzebub. “Will you want to take care of this?”
“No, that thing,” she said with a sneer “Can rot here for all I care, it’s useless now.”
“His name is Dog!” Adam shouted despite himself.
Gabriel dropped Dog and suddenly a bush grew around Dog like a cage, shutting him in. The Archangel turned toward Adam. “You,” Gabriel said, his voice dripping with contempt, “need to zip it, you goddamn brat. The adults are talking.” He turned his back toward Adam then and waved a hand at the woman holding his face. She dug her nails in tighter, causing his skin to sting.
“Papa!” Adam shouted in spite of himself. “Daddy, it hurts, make it stop!”
“I’m here Adam.” Adam glanced over. Dad was looking at him intently. “I’m right here. It’s going to be alright.” Dad’s head nodded minutely. “Papa’s right here.”
Adam swallowed and his gaze drifted over to where Pop was now being held up by the bald man with metal in his teeth.
“Daddy?” Adam asked in a sob.
“Oh, your old Dad’s right here, Adam,” Pop said with all sarcastic enthusiasm he could muster. “I’m sure this is all one big misunderstanding.” The bald man must have tightened his grip on the back of Pop’s neck because he winced in pain.
“Enough of this,” Beelzebub declared. “We shall take care of the traitors and drag him,” they motioned toward Adam. “back in front of his father.”
“Haven’t you heard?” Pop gritted through his teeth. “Adam changed that.”
Gabriel frowned and stared at Pop long and hard. “You have no right to talk to me, after all you’ve done,” Gabriel said, his voice filled with contempt. He shook his head. “I really should have known it would be you. You have been nothing but a thorn in the almighty’s side, even before your fall.” Gabriel spit on Pop’s face.
“Stop that!” Dad shouted trying to wrench free once more.
“Oh you,” Gabriel snarled turning toward Dad. “Yes, let’s deal with this useless excuse for an angel first.” He walked to Dad, staring him eye to eye. “Traitor to heaven.”
“If I’m a traitor, why haven’t I fallen?” Dad asked, his voice full of barely contained fury.
Gabriel punched Dad in the stomach. “You won’t have the chance, we’re taking care of the problem far more permanently,” Gabriel said, his voice was ice cold. His face was full of judgment and disgust. “You let him defile your sacred vessel. You laid with a demon and raised the Son of Satan as your own. You’re as good as fallen.”
“Strictly speaking, he was the one more likely to be defiling me,” Pop quipped. “If we’re being technical.”
“Shut your fucking mouth.” Gabriel shouted. He walked up to Pop again, the bald man forcing Pop to look Gabriel directly in the eye as Gabriel removed his sunglasses and flung them toward the edge of the garden. He shook his head minutely. “You know, I never understood why you did what you did. You gave up everything, your power, your status, to become some rank and file demon. We could have achieved so much more. You could have been so much more, and you’re not even middle management.” He crowded into Pop’s personal space as Adam heard Beelzebub laugh. “Pathetic.”
“Gabriel enough, please,” Dad cried out. “You-It doesn’t- He’s not-“ Dad tried to shake his head, but the demons held him firm.
“Oh, did he not tell you?” The blonde demon whispered in Dad’s ear. “Did Mr. Slick never tell you who he was before he fell?”
“Thinks he’s so important,” the sharp toothed woman hissed in his other ear. “But now he’s a nobody.”
“You angels think we forget who we are, our first names given to us by her . Names we rejected.” Beelzebub walked up to Dad, standing incredibly close to him, enough to run a hand down his cheek in mock comfort. “We remember who we were,” Beelzebub explained. “And I know you all like to believe that remembering causes physical pain. And maybe it does others, but there was nothing stopping him. He could have told you at any time and didn’t.” She sank her fingers into the back of Dad’s head. “And doesn’t that burn, knowing he lied to you?”
“I didn’t have to lie,” Pop shouted before Dad could respond. “He figured it out years ago.” Pop moved his head just enough to be able to look at Dad. “He didn’t have to say anything, but he knew.”
“That’s bullshit,” the short haired Angel sneered, re-aiming the holy water gun. “Aziraphale isn’t nearly clever enough to figure that out.”
“Thanks for the ringing endorsement, Uriel,” Dad snarked. He kept eye contact with Pop. “But he’s right, I knew. I’ve known for a while.”
“Oh, is that so?” The man with metal in his teeth said. “What’s his name then?”
Dad took a deep breath. “Raphael.”
“Enough of this!” Gabriel shouted obviously frustrated, still standing before Pop. “You figured it out. So what? You’re all traitors and you’re all gonna die and we’re gonna make this brat here watch you go so he can learn his lesson.” Gabriel sighed. “I’m going to be so grateful to her when you’re finally no longer anyone’s problem.” He took the water gun from the angel named Uriel. The bald angel forced Pop to kneel before Gabriel. “And to think, I once considered you my equal.”
Gabriel lowered the gun and pointed it directly at Pop’s forehead and pulled the trigger.
“No!” Adam shouted thrashing wildly within the woman’s grasp, her nails scratching his face. She moved one hand to the nape of his neck practically paralyzing him with her unnaturally strong grip. Dad was also shouting and fighting against the restraint of the Demons around him, both desperately trying to get to Pop.
A stream of water hit Pop on the forehead, splashing all over his face. His hair was wet and water dripped down his nose. Pop merely frowned.
Gabriel pulled the trigger again. And again. And Again. He emptied the pistol onto Pop’s face.
“Do you plan on just mussing up my hair or does this have a point?” Pop asked through gritted teeth.
“What the fuck?” Gabriel shouted, tossing the gun in frustration. “Who the fuck checked this gun?”
“Y-you did,” Uriel whispered, her voice beginning to sound afraid.
“You even reblessed it yourself,” the woman holding Adam’s head said, fear flooding her voice as well.
Gabriel whipped around, facing Dad. “Take care of him then.”
Suddenly, there was a column of fire between Beelzebub and where Dad was held. The demons on either side of him pushed Dad into the fire, releasing their grip.
Dad stood in the hellfire, perfectly calm. Perfectly whole.
Adam felt the grip on him loosen slightly and when Dad stepped out of the fire, Adam elbowed the woman and made a break for Dad. They met in the middle and Dad stepped between the other celestial beings and Adam. Adam wrapped his arms tightly around his middle.
In the confusion Pop also broke his hold and ran over to them. He stood in front of Dad and Adam, his entire body coiled in protective stance. “You all need to leave, now,” Pop hissed. “Before we all figure out what else Adam has changed.” He stood up straighter. “What else Aziraphale and I can do to you now. You’ve hurt the only creatures in the entire planet I care about. And we’re stronger than ever now. Do you really want to test that?”
In a flash the demons and angels were all gone. Save Dad and Pop, of course.
Dad fell to his knees, breathing heavily. Adam moved so he was properly in Dad’s arms as they knelt on the ground. “Holy shit,” he muttered under his breath.
“A-Are they gone?” Azdam asked quietly.
Dad and Pop both closed their eyes and focused. “Yeah,” he heard Dad say. “Yeah, they’re gone.”
Pop sniffed offered them a hand. “Let’s get inside anyway. No point in sitting on the ground.”
Pop waived his hand and freed dog from his prison. Dog followed them inside. Adam held him tight and collapsed back down onto the carpet. Dog licked his face and nuzzled into him, a comforting weight in his lap.
“Drink,” Dad mumbled. “I need a drink.” However, instead of going into the kitchen he collapsed onto the sofa. “Or a nap.”
“I could go for either as well, truth be told,” Pop walked into the kitchen and pulled out a flannel, drying his face carefully. Pop carefully started preparing coffee, pouring some creamy liqueur into his and Dad’s coffee cups.
“Adam, you want a drink?” Dad mumbled. “I think he deserves one.”
“I should object,” Pop said as he dried his hair and face carefully and a touch miraculously. “But right now I can’t really be bothered to care.” He sighed and poured Adam a small sample in addition to his cocoa. “Can’t hurt.” He carried the tray and set it on the coffee table before collapsing onto the sofa, Dad rearranging himself so his head rested in Pop’s lap.
They all sat in silence, afraid to move. The only sound that could be heard was their deep breathing. Finally Dad looked up at Adam. “Adam, your face,” he whispered gently.
Adam raised a hand and rubbed his cheeks and his fingers were suddenly sick. He pulled his hand away to find his fingertips covered with a mixture of tears and blood.
“Come here, dear,” Pop said gently. Adam shuffled on his knees over to him. He felt the familiar warmth of a miracle on his face and neck. “There you are. Much better.”
“Thanks Dad,” Adam mumbled before resting his head against “Pop’s’ knee.
“Was hoping you’d figured that out,” ‘Dad’ mumbled, finally forcing himself into a sitting position.
Adam smiled softly. “I didn’t know when I first got out there. But I got the hint. ”
“I’m sorry, Adam, tried to tell you as soon as we could,” ‘Dad’ mumbled finally picking up his mug.
“Maybe we should switch back before we start drinking?” ‘Pop’ asked.
“Fair point.” ‘Dad’ grabbed ‘Pop’ and kissed him. Their bodies became hazy and then they were themselves again.
“D-Do you think they’ll leave us alone?” Adam asked quietly after a while.
“With any luck, they’re running terrified,” Pop answered. “Or at least it’s going to take a long while for them to get the nerve to try something new.”
“If they can come up with something new,” Dad added.
Adam and Pop hummed in agreement.
Later that afternoon, after a midmorning to early afternoon nap for the entire family Crowley reclined with Aziraphale on a tartan blanket in the field behind their home. Adam had gone off with his friends to play who knows what, but he’d be fine. Crowley was quite certain this picnic was perhaps the laziest way to celebrate their victories over heaven and hell, but he also felt that he and Aziraphale earned the right to take perhaps the next century or so in a lazy fashion.
Presently, Crowley was trapped by Heavenly forces. “I’m sorry Angel but I can’t help but think we’ve got this a little backwards,” he said with a chuckle.
Aziraphale laughed and pressed the apple slice even more firmly against Crowley’s lips. He was in a playful mood, but so was Crowley so it was alright. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“You are such a bastard,” Crowley said with a minute shake of his head. Finally he took a bite. “What ever did I ever do to deserve you?”
“Something good?” Aziraphale teased.
“Fuck you,” Crowley said with a kiss to Aziraphale’s fingertips.
“Perhaps, later, though,” Aziraphale said with a sigh, laying down. “Not where people can see.”
Crowley wrapped himself around Aziraphale, resting his head on his Angel’s chest. “I love you,” He said as his eyes drifted shut.
Aziraphale’s arms wrapped around Crowley and pulled him even closer. “And I love you,” Azirphale said with another contented sigh.
Crowley felt relaxed and happy enough he nearly considered falling asleep right there on Aziraphale. The sunday afternoon sun warmed him in a way that made his reptilian instincts content and peace warmed him from the inside out.
Except for a few niggling questions. “Angel,” Crowley began hesitantly.
Aziraphale hummed in acknowledgement.
“Earlier, when you said you figured out who I was before-,” Crowley shifted uncomfortably, clinging to Aziraphale tighter. “Did you mean it? Or were you bluffing? I don’t care. I just-I don’t want you to think- that I was lying.”
Aziraphale made a noncommittal sound. “I had pieced together that you had been important in heaven, you made the stars for goodness sake,” he explained. “But the specifics never mattered.”
Crowley frowned and pushed himself up. That had not been in any of the answers he expected. He slithered up Aziraphale’s body so he could watch his face carefully. “Never mattered?”
“Exactly,” Aziraphale replied as if that was a suitable answer. Crowley said nothing so he continued. “I admit, I was curious and did a bit of poking around, particularly right after Adam entered the picture and you and I became…” Aziraphale blushed slightly. “Intimate.” That made sense to Crowley, temptation and curiosity made sense to Crowley. They were as natural to him as breathing was to humans. “But then of course I got caught up in research, trying to prevent the apocalypse and so....” Aziraphale trailed off again. “Not my highest priority.”
Crowley propped himself up, draping his torso over Aziraphale’s. “You mean that?”
Aziraphale smiled at him and carded fingers through Crowley’s hair. “Of course. Though I must admit, your heavenly name was a bit of a surprise.” Aziraphale let out a small laugh. “I did always wonder why they stopped talking about Raphael.”
Crowley laughed. “Surprised you bagged and shagged a former archangel?”
Aziraphale’s blush darkened. “Well, I wouldn’t put it quite like that,” he said quickly. “And besides, I realized a long time ago, that I had fallen in love with a demon named Crowley, not whatever Angel you had been.”
Crowley froze, an unnecessary breath catching in his throat. Crowley choked on any words he could possibly say to that. “I-I love you too, Angel. For so long. And I always will. And I can say it more now, you know.”
“It’s like you said, we have more time now.”
Crowley kissed Aziraphale gently on the lips. Crowley desperately wanted to take Aziraphale home and show how much he loved Aziraphale.
Crowley slowly developed a list of things that he wants to do now, as they lazily kiss in the afternoon sun. Make love to Aziraphale. Figure out what the little tingling sensation he’s had since Adam told Satan to fuck off was. Find a way to memorialize that moment forever. Figure out why the witch, Anathema had texted him asking him to come over. Get Adam’s friends to stop saying they’ve pledged their lives in service to the antichrist aloud.
But now, he had time. They had all the time in the world.