Chapter Text
March 2018, Daegu University
The next morning, the spring’s glow illuminates through the windowsill of the dorm and hits Taehyung’s face. He wakes up this way, the warmness of the sun was starting to make Taehyung sweat as a result of staying in one position for so long.
But any other shift proved to be no avail, as he was securely held in place by Jimin’s arms who was sound asleep, and very much spooning him. Taehyung could feel the hot gust of breath coming from Jimin’s mouth against his nape, and it fuels him in the same way one would blow air across a flame.
It’s comfortable, and entirely domestic , to be sleeping in his lover’s arms. There was a long list of firsts Taehyung had yet to experience in his routinely-filled life, and yet slowly but surely, Jimin seemed to help him fill all those voids secured deep within him.
Taehyung raises his hand to shield his eyes from the sun, and stays still for a little while longer, not wanting to disturb the other boy. After a few minutes, however, he feels Jimin stir, and Taehyung takes the opportunity to adjust himself, turning to his other side so that he fully faces his boyfriend.
And wow, how beautiful was he.
Jimin’s silky, golden locks were fanned out across his face like a pretty veil. His cheeks looked softer than the pillows they were laying on, and Taehyung was close enough to count all of the freckles adorning his face. It is unfair, he thinks, because no one should look this angelic at this hour of the morning. But he couldn’t help but continue looking, admiring, in utter disbelief that such a wonderful person would want him.
Taehyung places his left hand on Jimin’s cheek affectionately, and then realizes: this was the first time they’ve slept together. He had been so tired last night that he never made it to his own dorm. Taehyung swallows nervously. He knows how weary Jimin was when he would ask to stay over, and wonders what changed.
Jimin stirs and Taehyung is met with warm, brown eyes. The look on his face clearly shows that he’s surprised, and stiffens. Taehyung had feared that this moment would happen, expecting Jimin to pull away from the embrace. Except, he didn’t, and instead takes a good look at his arm over Taehyung, intensely as if he were in deep contemplation. But then, his demeanor softens, letting out a content, relaxed sigh. Taehyung smiles in relief, wrapping his left arm around Jimin’s waist and pulling him closer.
“Good morning, lovely,” Jimin greets, nosing at his cheek.
“Good morning,” Taehyung replies shyly. He notices how close their lips are, and closes the distance.
It was the first of March, and soon spring will come into full fruition. He had felt it the moment he woke up, a chance for a new beginning—a fresh start. To him, it seemed as if the universe was giving him the go, the perfect opportunity for him to complete the next chapter of his life he had been hesitating to close. It was now or never, so Taehyung knew that it had to be today.
As the two get up from the bed and prepare themselves for the day, Taehyung gathers up the courage to ask Jimin about a potential plan.
“Hey, Jimin?”
“Yes?”
“After classes today, can you come by my dorm? I have something to show you.”
Jimin looks at him with an indiscernible expression, but then smiles kindly. “Of course, I’ll meet you there then.”
Classes seemed to last for an eternity, but Taehyung couldn’t help it—couldn’t help looking at the clock every few minutes. He stared at the small hands of the clock and hoped that somehow it would run faster. He listened to the droning of each professor, lecture after lecture, but was unable to process any of the information thrown at him.
If it ever any other day, he would’ve chastised himself for being an inadequate student but he couldn’t help it, not when the biggest decision of his life was awaiting him in a few, drastically long, hours.
The feeling that followed him after every class, wasn’t necessarily an anxious feeling, but similar, although foreign. Maybe it was because it had to do with Jimin, but it was also knowing that today would fully bring Jimin and Blue together, and so this strange feeling was a dire blend of the emotions he felt for both of them. He was nervous, and a little scared, but most importantly, it was if he was slowly being liberated, like peace made its way home to him.
And even on his break, Taehyung told himself that he didn’t want to face him just yet, and sent him a quick message saying that he was going to spend time at the laboratory. Jimin was understanding as ever, much to Taehyung’s relief.
He took his time walking towards the building. It was no doubt that the school’s atmosphere was different. Although it was true that some things didn’t change, like the quick pace of the crowds rushing to their classes, there was the small majority who walked like they were befriending the magnificent sun. It was still cold, but the feeling of the large star on his skin felt comforting. It was desperately needed after a large period of nothing but gray clouds and white seams.
For a long time, Taehyung thought that winter was the most profound, prettiest season, but he had to admit that something about the renewal of spring felt heavenly. It was just the first of march, and yet, he is able to detect the thinning of the snow around the planters that if he looked hard enough, he would be able to see the glowing green of the trees under it. He was excited to see the vibrant colors of the flowers once they’ve bloomed.
When Taehyung reaches the large laboratory, he steps through the door and releases a breath he wasn’t aware of holding. He had only visited the place a few times on occasion, when he needed to perform labs for some of his classes. If anything, he utilized a majority of his time at the library and the café. And yet, the laboratory held a sense of familiarity in the same way the other two buildings did. It wasn’t as quiet as the library, and it definitely wasn’t petite like the café, but it made Taehyung feel calm and pristine—and that was enough for him to grow fond of it.
Yet, if there is something he knows is the main reason behind going into the building, it’s because he felt drawn to it. Again, he wouldn’t be able to explicitly explain what it meant, but he knows he’s supposed to be here, whatever the reason.
He walks around the area and observes the small groups of students at the stations, the justified manner they were taking notes and peering into the microscopes, and is immediately reminded of Jimin. His breath hitches at the realization, and finally comprehends the strange pull he had felt.
All those months ago, before fall terms had even started, he explicitly remembers Jeongguk showing him the laboratory for the first time. He was far more timid back then, a little weary and fragile, who had felt so small in the abundant world of the university. And as they were passing through the stations, Jimin had been there. He was sitting at a station, all alone and concentrated, peering through a silver microscope when Taehyung had noticed him.
Taehyung must look strange to be standing in the middle of the laboratory with wide eyes and mouth open, but he doesn’t care. The golden boy back then still glows the same now, if not brighter, and Taehyung is astonished by the very fact that they went from mere strangers to something more.
It was like they were fated to meet, as if there were from the same star, meant to collide and create something beautiful. And he is thankful for that.
“Taehyung, hi! I didn’t expect to see you here.”
Taehyung turns around and finds Namjoon walking towards him, waving at him timidly.
“Hey Namjoon, I was just exploring the area,” He smiles politely.
Namjoon grins in return. “I see. I was just working on a last minute project, but I have some time if you want a quick tour?”
“Oh no, I’m fine, don’t worry! I know where the majority of things are around here. I came for a visit as a way to...recall certain things I guess?” He looks off into the distance, trying to gather a cohesive explanation for the older.
Namjoon gives him a look of confusion. “What do you mean?”
“Um,” he sputters nervously. “Well, today is kind of a big deal for me. With Jimin and I getting closer, I’m taking another step in letting him know about all parts of myself this time, if that makes sense? And the laboratory just reminds me of when I had first seen him.” Taehyung fidgets awkwardly, placing his hands into the warmth of his coat’s pockets.
Namjoon raises his eyebrows and nods. “No, I get it! I’m glad you two are working out,” another smile is exchanged, but when Taehyung doesn’t return it, he frowns. “You seem a bit troubled though, do you wanna talk about it?”
Taehyung looks up at him and bites his lip in contemplation. He eventually nods, and scans around the building. “Can we sit down somewhere, though?”
“Yeah sure, follow me.”
With great benevolence, Namjoon leads him to the end of the laboratory, at the last station behind a cluttered counter of textbooks. Taehyung takes notice of its contents, the papers strewn about, various flasks and liquid-colored tubes Taehyung doesn’t know the names of. He is quick to put together that this station was specifically reserved for Namjoon, which was expected seeing how Namjoon wasn’t much of a people person either and often enjoyed studying by himself.
Namjoon grabs a second stool from the neighboring station and pulls it next to his. Once the two have settled down comfortably, facing each other and leaning against the counter, they rejoin the conversation.
“Okay so, what’s going on?” Namjoon starts softly.
“Well,” an unsteady breath. “I don’t want to get too into detail and explain everything but, I guess I just feel a bit nervous. I really meant it when I said that today was a huge deal—but, you know—what if Jimin doesn’t want to be with me anymore? Or what if—he’s weirded out or something? For the most part, I mean, I feel sure and confident enough to tell him but at the same time I can’t guarantee what his reaction will be. I want to be accepted so badly, reveal my innermost thoughts and beliefs—“ His throat started to give up then and there, voicing cracking noticeably as his anxious emotions got to him.
“Okay, whoa, let’s slow down a bit,” Namjoon cuts in. “Take your time, take a deep breath.” His delicate tone calms Taehyung a bit, so he nods and tries to ease his breathing. Namjoon watches on patiently, then continues.
“I understand where you’re coming from; opening up is scary! But it’s okay to feel nervous. It’s natural. Taehyung, even though we might not be the closest, even upon first impression, I was able to quickly learn how incredibly strong and intelligent you were. You have to trust yourself a bit more. You and Jimin already seem so close, even a stranger could tell that your guys’ bond is unbreakable. Don’t let these negative, false thoughts take over. Clearly you want to tell Jimin this, so trust your gut and everything will be fine. All it takes is faith, friend.”
Taehyung sniffles. Namjoon was right, he needed to believe in himself and trust the situation. He felt a lot better now.
“Thank you, Namjoon. It means so much, you have no idea.”
The mentioned man shoots him another smile, dimples on full display. This time, Taehyung returns it.
Taehyung walks towards his dormitory with his phone in hand. He quickly dials Jeongguk’s number and brings the phone to his left ear. It rings about three times until he hears a click from the other line.
“Ayo, what’s up?”
His roommate sounded a bit tired, regardless of his enthusiasm. Taehyung giggles at this, endeared by the younger boy.
“I was just wondering where you were,” He says.”Wanted to ask you something.”
“Oh, I’m at the library right now. I came here a few minutes ago after class. What’s wrong? Is everything okay?”
Taehyung slows his pace. “Yeah, everything’s fine, don’t worry. I just wanted to ask if I could have the dorm to myself for a few hours.” He bites at his bottom lip anxiously.
After a periodical moment of utter silence, however, Jeongguk complies. “Yeah sure, that’s fine. I’ll just continue studying here then.”
Taehyung sighs happily. “Cool, thanks Gguk.”
“No problem. Stay safe.”
He feels comforted by his roommate’s cool tone. “Will do, you too.” He replies, already inside the building. He ends the call quickly and stuffs his phone in his coat pocket as he presses the top arrow button in the elevator.
When Taehyung reaches room 415, it has already turned into evening, when the clouds have gathered and turned a deep tangerine. He fumbles with his keys and opens the dorm door slowly. He is instantly met with the sight of his boyfriend, who had already been waiting for him. He’s perched on Taehyung’s bed, textbook in hand and reading quietly. When Taehyung closes the door behind him, Jimin looks up.
“Hello,” He greets shyly.
“Hi,” Taehyung responds.
The two stay looking at each other, wordless stares passed as if hidden cryptic were stuck between each look, and it stays like that until Jimin breaks eye contact, placing his gaze onto the book he’s holding as he sets it aside.
When he returns his eyes towards Taehyung, they’re welcoming, and the taller boy takes the opportunity to set his bag aside and toe off his shoes. He tentatively walks over and sits down next to Jimin. As if he could read Taehyung’s body language, he takes his hand in his and leans in for a soft kiss.
Taehyung hums and leans into the touch. If he were completely honest, he could die on Jimin’s lips. Every kiss sent him on an unpredictable high, from the chaste ones to the raunchy ones, and the way his plush lips melted and fit so well with his own felt like an eternal promise.
The two pull away, and Taehyung grabs Jimin’s other hand. They’re both facing each other on the compact bed—the atmosphere felt serene, and most importantly, encouraging.
“Did you wait for long?” Taehyung asks, eyebrows furrowed.
Jimin kisses the back of his left hand. “I didn’t. Class ended early so I headed here and let myself in with the spare key.”
“Okay, I’m glad,” Taehyung muses.
Jimin smiles but continues eyeing him expectantly. Taehyung purposely avoids his gaze, and opts to play with Jimin’s smaller fingers for brief distraction.
“Is everything alright, Taehyungie?”
Taehyung looks up then, and finds Jimin’s poorly concealed concern written all over his face. He gapes and nods in attempts to reassure his boyfriend that he was fine.
“Yeah! I’m just thinking. I really wanna show you some things but I don’t know where to start, sorry.” He explains bashfully.
Jimin relaxes, then tightens his hold. “Take your time.”
Taehyung nods and looks off to his right. He spots the black duffel bag tucked inside the bottom of the desk. Like clockwork, it calls out to him, but Taehyung hesitates. Should he show Jimin his paintings first thing? Would it be too overwhelming? He chews on his bottom lip and recalls his childhood.
He briefly turns to face Jimin and finds him looking at him attentively. Their hands are still clasped together; Taehyung could feel Jimin’s hands starting to get clammy. He flashes him a slight smile, endeared by Jimin’s small hands.
Maybe it was Jimin’s curious stare, or the way his eyes shined like subtle, tiny droplets, but it suddenly hits Taehyung with the realization of where he should start.
He startles Jimin when he lets go of his hands and springs off the bed. Taehyung kneels to rummage through the cluttered contents underneath his bed. When his hand feels for a familiar wooden box, he pulls it out and dusts it off.
“What is it?”
Taehyung looks up. “These are my old journals. Kept them for memory’s sake.” Once he’s wiped off the majority of the collected dust, he grabs the box and sits down in front of Jimin again—this time, cross-legged.
Jimin continues to look at the medium-sized box, ambient in its presence. Slowly, Taehyung takes off the lid and reveals the inside.
Newer journals were placed on the top, while the oldest ones were at the very bottom. Taehyung takes out each journal and lays them out on the bed. Once he reaches the final journal, his heart nearly stops. Jimin continues to watch silently.
He picks up his very first journal, already graying and worn, and feels an intense, insurgent wave of nostalgia. The hospital’s black logo was in the center and served as the title, yet right under it was a very poorly written Kim Taehyung. Taehyung passses his thumb over the name and smiles sadly.
“This is my first journal.” He says after a brief moment. He opens it, skims through the pages and then looks at Jimin. “I don't expect you to read all of it, but a majority of the earlier entries consist of my first accounts with Blue. The very beginning—the start of it all, if you will?” He stutters a bit as he turns to the first page. “Here,” Taehyung hands Jimin the journal with both hands. “Why don’t you read the first few entries?”
Jimin gulps and grabs the book carefully. He shifts his position and fixes himself into a more comfortable position, mirroring Taehyung. He holds each side of the book with one hand, gripping it delicately as if he were afraid it’ll break.
“Can I read it out loud?” Jimin asks gently.
Taehyung is surprised at his sudden demeanor, but quickly shakes it off. “Oh uh, yeah sure. I could also use a refresher.” He places his hands, now free, into his lap.
Jimin glances down at the page and clears his throat.
“Dear diary,
I dreamt of a boy here. It seemed all too real...His hair was black and his skin was white but the night allowed him to glow a bluish hue,”
Taehyung lowers his head, heart pounding.
“I saw his face, it didn’t look familiar. He seemed to be around my age,”
Taehyung’s heartbeat begins to bleed into his ears. He scrunches his eyes closed. Something external emanated with the way Jimin read his entry. His voice ran a little softer, quieter, and maybe even more hesitant. But it sounded like a breathless melody as he coated honey with every word he spoke. It almost didn’t even sound like a voice a human being could fabricate. It sounded too heavenly, ethereal.
And even as Jimin continued to read his entries, one by one, it never ceased. He kept the same pacifying tone, and it sent Taehyung further into an otherworldly daze.
Jimin kept describing Blue, and little by little, Taehyung saw more of him.
“Wow, that was—“
An hour or two had passed, and two were already well into finishing most entries about Blue. Both boys are at a loss for words, both equally enthralled and mesmerized, but for different reasons.
Taehyung doesn’t leave his gaze on Jimin for a second. Jimin does the same.
“How was it?” Taehyung asks, unsure. He watches the way Jimin closes the book slowly, and keeps it in his lap. Jimin’s grip on the spine looks stronger than before, his knuckles turning white.
Jimin swallows, adam’s apple bobbing slightly. “It was wonderful, Taehyung,” He says slowly. “Before I say anything else, I want to thank you for letting me read this—for sharing it with me. You have no idea what it means to me.”
Taehyung laughs nervously. “Of course. Now that we’re together, it’s important for us to open up and trust each other. I would expect the same for you, right?”
Jimin winces a bit. “Yes, of course.”
Taehyung smiles. He takes note of the way the setting sun hits Jimin’s skin, and falls for him all over again.
“You know,” Taehyung starts. “Call me crazy, but you’ve always reminded me of the sun somehow. There’s something about you that radiates positively, light, and beauty—sorry, I—am I getting weird?”
Jimin chokes. “No—I—you’re not, I promise.” His voice sounded strained.
Taehyung feels himself start to sweat. “Anyways,” He laughs, attempting to ease away the tension. “Back to what we were talking about. You were saying?” Taehyung gestures for Jimin to continue.
“Oh, right. Well—I loved it. I loved the way you wrote about Blue and described him. Even if you were still young at that time, there’s no doubt that the level of intimacy was large—it was there. I wasn’t the one who wrote it, but even I felt it—the way you loved and admired Blue,” Jimin clears his throat again. “Actually, I find it even more admirable the way you kept these journals for so long. I didn’t even—I mean, it’s crazy how dedicated you were in recording all your times with him. I’m sure he’d feel very t-touched actually.”
Taehyung sighs contentedly. “Yeah, I’m glad I kept these. It feels healing to be able to reread them again, especially with you. All of this just, feels so...right? I can’t explain it but—I’m glad it was you.” He leans over and grabs Jimin’s hand, caressing it softly. “I don’t think I would’ve shared this with anyone else.”
Jimin laughs wetly.
“Are you okay?” Taehyung looks over at him worriedly.
Jimin pecks his nose and pulls back with a warm smile. “Yeah, don’t worry, just touched,” he assures.
Taehyung scrunches his nose and giggles. Whatever initial reaction Jimin may have had was quick to slip through Taehyung’s mind. His boyfriend looked exactly the way he had said, touched , and any other negative or underlying connotations that may have been present had Taehyung questioning if they were even there to begin with.
But he trusts Jimin, so he won’t think twice of it.
“I have a few more things to show you still,” Taehyung says, leaving the bed once more.
Jimin hums melodically. “What is next?”
Taehyung walks over to his desk and grabs the black duffel bag stuffed underneath, taking it out. “I want to show you my paintings,” He huffs.
He carries it and throws it on the bed hastily. Jimin scoots himself further so that his back lies against the wall. Once Taehyung plops himself onto the opposite side of the bed, he zips open the bag. Like previously, he grabs the first canvases and lays them out on the space between them.
To be quite frank, this part of show and tell made him the most nervous. He kept his attention on the paintings in fear of how Jimin would react. He makes use of his attention and scans through his works, then finally chooses the one where he had painted the sky at night.
“This is one of my first paintings.” He grabs the painting and holds it up for Jimin to see. “It’s—obviously not that great but you know, it holds value since the moon was so prominent the night I left the hospital.”
Jimin awes at it. If it were up to Taehyung’s judgment, he might have been a bit too emotional. Everything from his glassy eyes, tinted cheeks, and blank face told him that maybe it didn’t just hold significance to Taehyung after all.
He hands Jimin the painting, who takes it with ease. Jimin eyes the canvas, still reserved. All the while, Taehyung picks up another piece and smiles at it when he recognizes what it is.
“Oh! I remember this one too, actually. This one is one of my favorites.”
Jimin gently places the previous painting to the side and then stares at the one in his boyfriend’s hand. “It looks so beautiful, Taehyung,”
The mentioned boy blushes. “Thank you. This is the Grebe I was telling you about when we went to the park together. I drew this roughly two years ago, I think? In the summer. I gained a lot more creativity because of it.”
Jimin takes hold of the painting and marvels at the strokes and colors. The little bird sat placid on the surface waters of the lake, looking lively and colorful as ever. In a way, it reminded Jimin of Taehyung. He giggles fondly at the thought.
“What are you laughing at?” His boyfriend asks curiously.
Jimin looks up at him and shakes his head playfully. “Nothing, don't worry.”
Taehyung sticks his tongue out and continues looking through the paintings. The silence that follows after is a comfortable one, with Taehyung looking over and handing Jimin his art, and Jimin gawking at each and every single one of them.
With the way his boyfriend’s actions and expressions are delivered, Taehyung should honestly feel bashful, but instead he feels calmer and much more confident than when he had first woken up.
When he retrieves the final paintings, his heart, however, begins to pick up its pace again.
The oil painting he holds in his palms is the exact one that Jeongguk had seen—the one of Blue, but Blue in the full— face, body and all.
Taehyung takes a final glance at Jimin only to find him already eyeing the painting wearily. He tries to hide his anxiousness with a final, determined look at his artwork.
“Okay…” He says slowly. “This one is a bit...I don’t know—“ He feels himself at a loss for words the more he watches Jimin study the painting. With shaken eyes and bated breath, Taehyung scoots closer and gives the canvas to his boyfriend.
Jimin wordlessly grabs it and upon examining it more closely, lets out a choked noise. Taehyung watches on helplessly, silently, as Jimin peers at Blue’s detail, but most importantly, his face.
“Jimin—I swear—I know what you’re thinking but, please —“
The look Jimin gives him causes him to lose his train of thought. He looked...devastated? Wistful, aghast. A gross knot forms in Taehyung’s throat, all confidence wearing away quicker than it first came.
“Jimin…” He tries again.
Again, nothing but deafening silence. Taehyung knows this situation all too well, and he wasn’t going to let it happen again. When he tries to pry away the painting, for his boyfriend’s sake, Jimin pulls away.
Taehyung leans back and watches him, bemused. The air felt undeniably more tense, if anything, he felt as if the room wanted to suffocate him. Cold sweat began to form on the small of his back. He felt his insides start to shake.
Jimin didn’t look any better. He looks out the window and finds that it is already dark.
“Ji-“
”Taehyung.”
Taehyung shuts his mouth. He watches Jimin closely, and waits for him to continue.
“Wh-what was the last thing you wanted to show me?”
Jimin’s voice sounded surprisingly more stable than his. Taehyung feels unsure.
“Wait but—I want to explain myself first—“
“Baby, please? Show me first.” His tone has now switched to sounding a bit desperate, a broken sound that Taehyung’s ears hated to hear.
Taehyung complies fairly quickly. He makes the short trip to the drawer next to his desk, and retrieves the final item.
He grabs the infinitesimal object, glowing bright and bold, and takes one final look at it before he walks back. This time though, he doesn’t sit back on the bed, instead remains in a standing stance when he carefully shows Jimin the meteorite.
“I know you saw this already,” Taehyung sighs, “But I never truly got to tell you what it was, and what it meant to me. I made sure to show you this along with everything else—well, because—it’s also linked to Blue. It’s pretty right?”
Jimin nods. He looks at it with unshed tears, and smiles, subtly, for the first time in an agonizing moment.
But the meteorite begins to glow impossibly brighter, it nearly blinds Taehyung’s eyes from his view. He grips onto the object with more vigor, determined not to let it fall despite his eyes failing him.
“Can I touch it?” He hears Jimin say patently.
Taehyung swallows, retreating the meteorite. “Um, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
He feels guilty, but he couldn’t risk hurting Jimin the same way he had to Jeongguk. The moment they were experiencing, have been experiencing, was already so fragile. One wrong move and Taehyung fears that Jimin would break. And if it wasn’t Jimin, it would be him.
Jimin deflates. “Why not?”
“I—you don’t wanna touch it. I don’t know why, but for some reason it burns other people? Like Jeongguk—and I really don’t want you to get hurt—“
“Taehyung, baby. I promise it won’t hurt me.” Jimin pleads, now standing up. Taehyung takes a quick step back.
“J-Jimin, no—it’s gonna hurt y—“
“Do you trust me?”
Just like that, the Earth stops rotating. The only thing that can be heard are crickets, singing outside the dorm. Taehyung didn’t think such silence could exist, where everything stills and holds their breath, but he was proven wrong.
Do you trust me?
Taehyung shivers. “Jimin, of course I do. What are you talking about?” He feels afraid of knowing the answer.
Jimin looks at him. His stare is all knowing and careful. He takes another tentative step forward. “Then, please , Tae. Let me touch it.”
Taehyung looks down at the meteorite, and then back at him. It has stopped glowing, and instead, turns a dark red. Taehyung stretches his hand towards Jimin and nods.
“Okay.”
Jimin closes their distance. They stand no longer than one foot apart, the meteorite resting on the taller’s hand only a few inches from him. He hovers his hand over it, but hesitates, and keeps it there. He locks eyes with Taehyung.
“Thank you for trusting me, lovely,” with his other hand, he caresses the side of his lover’s cheek. Taehyung leans into the touch and sighs, eyes lidded. “Now, I want you to continue trusting me, alright? Please, don’t be nervous, and don’t worry. Can you do that for me?”
Taehyung’s lips instinctively turn into a pout as he nods. His cheek was still pressed against Jimin’s warm palm, and doesn’t show any signs of leaning away. He felt noticeably better and calmer.
Jimin licks his lips. “Okay, good. Great.” He straightens and takes several deep breaths. He removes his hand from Taehyung’s face and grabs his free hand.
Five seconds turn into ten. By the time Taehyung counts to thirty, Jimin closes his eyes and places his hand on top of the meteorite.
And then, it happens.
Blue was now before him, a solidified embodiment of the boy he always saw in his dreams. What a wonder it was, as he sat watching, in a primordial paralyzation, the eyes of his dreams shadow his own.
The moonlight reflected off of his white, pale skin, painting it in a familiar blue tone. The small, delicate form of his body was draped in a midnight-blue cloth, revealing the contours of bony arms and legs.
Taehyung could see his face, no longer blurred like the one that originated in his dreams. His tousled hair resembled the night sky in its pitch-black color, framing small, slightly downturned eyes, emitting a brightness that rivaled the magnificent stars.
Trailing downwards was his narrowed nose, his pale, plump lips following suit, pursed in its refusal to speak. And his soft jawline was the finishing touch, framing his face with stark contrast.
...But this time, Blue looks at Taehyung with adoring eyes, his thoughts and intentions now fully revealed to Taehyung’s crystalline eyes.
“Blue,” Taehyung blinks once, twice.
“Yes, love? I’m here .”
Shaky, cold pale hands cradle his face. Taehyung looks at him, and wonders. To see those starry eyes again, peering into his own. The familiar blue adorned skin and midnight hair. Rough at the edges but soft at the seams. It was like his life had restarted again, like he was a kid again, in the olive gown surrounded by white, pearlescent walls. Blue looked unchanged, but at the same time, so different . A few years had caught up to him; he was no longer the young enigma he once knew, but all grown up. All grown up, just like him.
“Taehyung, my love, I know you must be feeling overwhelmed right now—“ Jimin’s voice can be heard coming from Blue’s mouth. Taehyung’s brain begins to unravel, and then put itself together again.
“ Oh, Taehyungie,” He feels Blue wipe away at his tears. “Please don’t cry.”
Taehyung smiles unknowingly, holding Blue’s hands in place. “I’m crying? I didn’t notice,” he breathes.
Blue looks at him with watery eyes as his bottom lip wobbles. His fascinating, star-like eyes melt once more, deliquescing into liquid gold. Taehyung gasps and pulls him closer.
“Blue, why are you crying?” He asks, pleading. Blue was even more marvelous up close.
A broken sob rips out from him. “Taehyung—I’m so so sorry . I left you alone for so long, I never told you, I’m so sorry, my precious Taehyungie—I promise you I tried my best—“
Taehyung shushes him calmly. “It’s okay, it’s okay. You’re here now , and that is all that matters. You came back,” He presses his forehead against Blue’s. “You came back like I knew you would. Deep inside, I always knew, Jimin.”
Blue sniffles. “I want to tell you everything.”
Taehyung looks at him and wipes his tears with his sleeve. “Then tell me, beautiful.”
Blue originates from the universe—from supernovas, galaxies, and shooting stars. Beings like him are born every time someone makes a wish upon the sky. They are creatures who thrive at night, and become weak in the sunlight.
They’re guardians of space, protectors of the moon.
And dreams are nothing short of gateways to the soul. Dreams have the power to manipulate reality, bend time and space. But it was rare, and Taehyung happened to be one of the lucky ones.
“I’m not sure how you did it,” Blue explains, “But I was able to have access to your dreams. I remember the way you looked at the night sky—how you longed for the moon. And every time you slept, you just gave me the opportunity to meet you and get close to you.”
The two were seated in the middle of the floor now, hand in hand, soothing. Taehyung listens attentively—looks at him like he was the only thing to ever exist—heart now uncaged.
“Taehyung, because of you , I was born. I was so certain that we were destined, that the universe moved for us so we could meet, in whatever shape or form. I—still think this, actually. And falling in love with you was just so easy . When I met you for the first time in the physical, I couldn’t help but think that you were it for me. That you were my person.”
Taehyung tears up and whines, looking down. “You know, it took awhile for me to get used to you but I felt the same. My love for you has never stopped.”
“ Oh , but neither did mine, darling. Please know that. When you left—it had devastated me so much, you have no idea. That hospital room was the only place I knew. I didn’t bother getting familiar with anything else because the room had you in it, and that is what mattered.”
Taehyung deflates. “I’m so sorry I left you. It wasn’t intentional.”
Blue tucks a stray hair behind Taehyung’s ear. “Don’t apologize. I didn’t know it then, but I know now. I’m just glad you’re not cooped up in that room anymore. Seeing the person you are now versus a few years ago makes me so relieved knowing you’ve come so far. Plus, it gave me all the more time to find my way back to you.”
“Blue, please,” Taehyung pleads, eyes shining. “How did you even find me again?”
Blue looks into his eyes for a brief moment. He looks around and then grabs the meteorite, placing it on top of Taehyung’s palm.
“You kept it, and it led me back to you.”
Taehyung closes his hand around the object and lets out a sob. Unwavering love and hope had brought them together.
“But then, Jimin—you are—?” A million questions were still running through Taehyung’s brain. It was confusing to him, but at the same time, everything made sense.
“Jimin is still me, I promise. It’s just a human form of myself. The years it took for me to adapt to Earth was enough for us to meet at the perfect timing—here in the university,” He leans in and slots himself into Taehyung’s arms. “It was a high risk, because it's known that my kind don’t do well in the daytime. But I was willing to take it if it meant finding you again.”
Taehyung presses closer and rests his chin on Blue’s shoulder. “I can’t thank you enough for not giving up on me, for loving me.”
At this, Blue starts to break down. He breaks away from the embrace and covers his face. Sobs rack through his petite body as his shoulders convulse.
“I thought—I thought you forgot about me, a-and that I lost my chance—when I first approached you here—and you said you didn’t recognize me. I—I thought I had lost my chance. But even if I did, I wasn’t going to let you go until you told me to. I was still going to try. It hurt me so much knowing I couldn’t be there for you. And on nights when things are starting to get unbearable, I wished more than anything that you’d be there—“
“Blue, Look—look at me,” Taehyung removed Blue’s hands from his face.
“I will always be here for you. It will be the same 10 years later...20 years later… countless years even. Just like you were there for me all these years, even when you weren’t there physically. You have helped me get through so much, and if it weren’t for the ounce of hope I carried with me since I left the hospital, I would have been so lost and alone.”
Blue sniffles. “I’m glad I met you. I’m glad we’re still here.”
Taehyung holds him close. Blue holds on tighter. “I’m glad, too. I love you.”
“I love you, too.” Blue looks at Taehyung and beams. The taller had no choice but to mirror the action. Their hearts synced and beat as one.
“Forever, yeah?”
“Always.”
A kiss to seal the promise. An embrace to celebrate the healing.
For half of his life, all Taehyung had known was loneliness. He was a clueless child who fantasized about meeting the moon and playing with the stars. And then, he meets Blue, and suddenly his small world changes. Years later, he meets Jimin, and begins to question the correlations—his intentions. He concluded that Blue was the moon, and Jimin the sun.
But the truth of the matter is, it wasn’t like that at all. In fact, he had it all wrong. The reality was Jimin, Blue, was always the sun,
And Taehyung? Well, he was the moon all along.
THE END