Chapter Text
“Hey, Ritsu, can we—”
Ritsu doesn’t even give Suzuki the chance to finish talking before he’s cutting him off and turning away, “My mistake , I’m busy right now.”
He leaves Suzuki standing at his desk as he heads to the student council room for a meeting. He doesn’t bother looking at Suzuki’s face because he’s still not in the mood to see it. But can anyone blame him? His best friend kissed him in the middle of working on his project and then left , saying it was a mistake .
And to rub salt in the wound, Ritsu’s had a huge crush on Suzuki for months . And of course the idiot makes him believe that his feelings were mutual. Apparently they aren’t.
Ritsu has every right to not want to see Suzuki’s face right now.
He’s been ignoring Suzuki for three days now, refusing to speak to him. He’s even resorted to hiding out around the school during lunch to avoid him. If he doesn’t, Ritsu might just send a telekinetic book to Suzuki’s cutely freckled face.
Damn his adorable freckles.
And his stupid goofy grin.
Ritsu grits his teeth as his thoughts trail off. That tends to happen whenever he thinks about Suzuki.
He gets to the meeting and sits down in his seat, and immediately his brain is elsewhere. Like it has been for the past three days. Ever since the kiss happened Ritsu has been replaying the scene again and again in his head, trying to make some sort of sense of it.
Suzuki seemed okay to kiss him, so why did he suddenly turn around and call it a mistake before running off? Did he end up regretting it last minute? Did he realize he really didn’t like Ritsu?
Ritsu’s mind tries to make sense of a million different reasons, but he doesn’t have the slightest clue of what the one reason could be.
And in order to find out that reason, he has to listen to Suzuki, something he’s not in the mood to do. Ritsu is no stranger to bottling things up after all. This isn’t any diffe—
“Kageyama-kun?”
Ah, right. He’s in the middle of the student council meeting. Ritsu offers a polite smile, “Sorry, what’s up?”
“I was asking if you had any ideas for the upcoming cultural festival.”
“Oh, right! Let’s see…”
He pushes Suzuki to the far back of his mind.
“Alright, talk.” Tanaka is slamming his hands down on Shou’s desk just as he reaches his seat to sit down, dejectedly. He looks at him just as he’s leveling Shou with a fierce, determined gaze. Misaki is standing behind him, looking just as determined as he is. “Something’s going on between you and Kageyama-kun, so spill!”
Shou blinks at him, surprised. Why are they suddenly asking about what happened? “Uh… what do you mean?” He asks in response, confused by the sudden appearance of his friends. He thought they had already gone to lunch, but apparently they didn’t.
This seems to be the wrong thing to ask, for Misaki is looking at him with a frown. “You know exactly what he’s talking about, Suzuki-kun. Kageyama-kun has been giving you the cold shoulder for the past three days now, and you’ve been hanging out with us during lunch. Not that we mind of course, but it’s obvious something happened between you two...”
“Oh… that …” Shou says, wincing as he directs his eyes to his desk. Just the mention of the situation is enough to make him think back to the kiss and the disaster that followed him shortly after it. He feels something touch his hand and he looks up, startled.
He meets Misaki’s kind blue eyes. Patience is written all over her face, and it makes any anxiety that Shou may be feeling lessen just a bit. “You can talk to us, Suzuki-kun, we’re your friends after all.” She encourages with a warm smile.
“Yeah!” Tanaka chimes in, grinning at him. “You wouldn’t believe the amount of times I’ve had to help Misaki-chan with any issues. I’m practically her walking diary at this point!” He laughs as Misaki exclaims his name in embarrassment.
Cracking a smile despite the situation, Shou gives in. He should’ve known he wouldn’t have been able to hide what happened with Ritsu for very long. Besides, it might be a good idea to talk to them about it. Maybe they might have some helpful insight to offer. But also… that requires him admitting how much of a jerk he had been. The very thought sends a burst of anxiety through him. What if they hate him because of this? Or worse… they don’t want to be friends with him anymore?
Shou shakes his head, pushing those thoughts aside. No point in thinking about ‘what-ifs’ right now. Nothing will happen if he doesn’t talk to them. Besides, he trusts them, he knows they won’t drop him just because he made a mistake.
Right?
The first thing Tanaka does after Shou explains what happened is knock him in the head while calling him an idiot. Misaki, for her part, scolds him but also holds her face in her hand, sighing. “You are probably the world’s biggest idiot, Suzuki-kun.” She mutters, and Shou feels like his mother has just caught him stealing from the cookie jar.
“I know…” He mutters in response, frowning. “But that’s why I keep trying to talk to him! But Ritsu just keeps avoiding me!” He cries, frustrated. “How am I supposed to fix things if I can’t talk to him?”
Misaki leans back and crosses her arms, “I don’t blame him. If one of my best friends suddenly kissed me and then called it a mistake right afterwards, I’d wanna avoid them too.” She says, and Shou feels guilt weighing on his shoulders. “Besides, do you even know what you’d say if he wasn’t avoiding you?” She asks, and Shou looks down at his lap.
“I was kinda just gonna wing it…”
Misaki groans, face palming, “You’re completely helpless. You absolutely helpless gay…” Shou has no comeback for that. It’s the truth.
“I’ve gotta ask though, Suzuki-kun. Why did you run outta there? Clearly you guys like each other, so wouldn’t that have been some sorta magical moment for you two?” Tanaka inquires, sounding as confused as Shou feels.
Shou pauses at his question and crosses his arms. With all of the guilt and reconciliation Shou’s been attempting to do, he didn’t really take the time to truly think about why he ran. He remembers feeling panicked and then acting on that panic instead of trying to work through it. Why had he felt so panicked back then? Clearly Ritsu returned his feelings, so why had he run away? Obviously if he hadn’t run away then there would’ve been a very different outcome…
And then it clicks and Shou has the urge to kick himself.
“Stuff between us would’ve changed.” He says, and his two friends look at him in confusion.
“Well yeah, you guys probably would’ve started dating.” Tanaka replies, blinking at him.
Shou shakes his head, “It’s not just that. There would’ve been a whole change to our dynamic, our routine… everything would’ve changed and I wasn’t ready for it. So I turned tail and ran.” He explains. His whole life had been a constant up and down between Claw and his parents. For the first time since then, Shou had a solid routine, he was carving out a nice, normal life for himself, and his crush on Ritsu could’ve destroyed that.
For someone who dealt with change on a daily basis, he had begun to subconsciously
fear
change. Because change brought unknowns, and not knowing what was coming next was always scary. It always terrified Shou.
“I think I get it.” Misaki says softly, catching his attention. “It doesn’t give you an excuse for what you did, but it does give you an explanation, yeah?” She offers with a small smile.
Shou nods in response, “I’ve uh… always kinda been scared of change, I’ve never liked it. But… I think that this is the one change that I’m not afraid of.”
“That is probably the most cheesiest thing I have
ever
heard you say, oh my
god
.” Tanak cuts in, making both Misaki and Shou laugh. “So, what are you gonna do next, Lover Boy?” Is Tanaka’s follow up question and Shou can’t help but glare at him while Misaki giggles behind her hand.
Sighing, Shou frowns and crosses his arms, “I have absolutely no idea. Ritsu refuses to listen to me, and I doubt he’s gonna let me any time soon. He’s got this weird thing about holding grudges, says it makes him more dramatic.” He grumbles.
“Kageyama-kun? Dramatic?” Misaki gasps, surprised. “I never would’ve guessed. He always seems so… stoic and serious, y’know?” She asks, making Shou nod.
Tanaka cuts in, exclaiming, “Isn’t the answer obvious?!”
Shou blinks at him, bewildered, “Um… no?”
Shaking his head, Tanaka points at Shou, “You have to be direct about your feelings! Make Kageyama-kun listen to you, don’t give him the chance to walk away until you’ve explained yourself!” For the second time, Shou blinks at how straightforward Tanaka’s advice is. That and it kinda sounds a bit ridiculous coming from him. “Don’t give me that look!” Tanaka exclaims, and Misaki giggles again.
“Uh, right, okay. Be direct, I can do that, yeah.” Shou nods to himself and Tanaka grins at him.
“Good! The rest is up to you, Suzuki-kun.” Tanaka says, pleased with him.
Glancing at the time, Shou sees that there’s still some time left in lunch. If he moves on, he can find Ritsu and get this all figured out before lunch is over. “I’m gonna go talk to Ritsu, thanks you guys!” He exclaims before standing from his desk and heading out of the classroom.
Misaki and Tanaka watch him go, smiling. Misaki’s smile turning a bit sly, she glances over at her best friend, “Be direct, huh?” She teases, “Sounds like someone needs to follow his own advice, Kaoru-kun~.”
Tanaka’s face promptly turns a bright red.
Ritsu is bored out of his mind in this meeting. They’ve gone over everything they needed for the school festival, and now the president is just dragging out the meeting by going on a tangent that Ritsu can’t even care enough about to listen to.
Why couldn’t this meeting have taken place after school? Man, this sucks.
Honestly, Ritsu would do anything to get out of this stupid meeting right now, he really would. There’s no point in the meeting anymore, they’ve all discussed what they needed to. And as if the universe were hearing his thoughts, the door to the room slams open. All eyes are drawn to the person standing in the doorway, and Ritsu’s eyes widen.
The person is none other than Suzuki, and Ritsu can’t help but curse the way his heart skips a beat at the sight of the boy in front of him. Suzuki picks his head up, and his eyes seem to be searching for someone.
And then they land on him.
“Excuse me but we’re in the middle of a meeting, did you--”
“Kageyama Ritsu!” Suzuki exclaims, completely ignoring the president. Ritsu has to stop himself from snorting at the flabbergasted look on the president’s face. “I like you, go out with me!”
Any amusement and relief Ritsu might have been feeling is drained out of him, and his eye twitches. ‘What is he doing ?!’ There’s a silence that settles over the room as Ritsu starts to feel everyone’s eyes on him, obviously waiting for a response.
Oh, Ritsu is going to kill him.
“Excuse us for one minute.” Ritsu says as calmly as possible before standing up from his seat. He walks up to Suzuki before grabbing him by the collar and dragging him out of the student council room. He drags Suzuki down the hall until they reach a stairway, where he finally lets go. Ritsu crosses his arms, trying to avoid creating a scene. “What were you thinking ?! We were in the middle of a meeting, Suzuki!” He practically hisses.
It wasn’t an important one, but Suzuki doesn’t have to know that.
“I had to be direct so you’d finally listen to me!” Suzuki exclaims in response, “I figured you’d be in a meeting since it’s Wednesday and you’d have to listen to me that way.”
Ritsu pinches the bridge of his nose as he exhales. He can’t believe Suzuki actually did that. And that confession . What is he supposed to make of that? One minute Suzuki is kissing him, calling it a mistake, and the next he’s asking Ritsu out? What the hell? He frowns at Suzuki, showing the other that he’s still very much upset with him, “Why are you so intent on making me listen to you, Suzuki? You made things quite clear after running out when we kissed.”
He sees Suzuki wince, the guilt poorly disguised on his face. “I-I know… but I have a good reason! Or at least, a good explanation, anyways. But in order to tell you that, you have to hear me out!”
Ritsu sighs quietly. He should really be getting back to that meeting before lunch is over, but his feet just don’t feel like moving. He bites his lip in contemplation, hurrying to make up his mind. He’s mad about what happened, but he does miss Shou. It won’t hurt to listen to him, at least. And who knows?
Ritsu stops that train of thought right there.
And he sighs again, looking at Shou, “You have five minutes.” He says, and tries to ignore the way Shou’s face lights up. “You better have a good explanation, Suzuki.”
“I know, I know. I think I do, or at least I hope I do.” Shou replies quickly. He has so many thoughts swirling in his head that he doesn't even know where to begin. He tries to think of something to start, anything to start. But his mind is drawing a blank and Shou frowns. Tanaka told him to direct, so maybe he should start with that.
Ritsu looks at him, raising a brow, expectant.
Shou takes a breath, “That day, when we kissed, I didn’t mean to call it a mistake.” He says, “I mean, it was, but not in the way you think it is!” He hurries to exclaim upon seeing Ritsu’s unhappy stare. “I have the world’s biggest crush on you Ritsu, honestly, I do. You get me in a way that no one else does. You’re fun to mess with, and honestly you’re super cute whenever you’re concentrating super hard on something and you scrunch your nose without realizing it. You’re my best friend and I wouldn’t trade our friendship for anything in the world.” He explains, feeling just how hot his face is.
Though, Ritsu’s face doesn’t look much better.
He tries to calm his nerves, reminding himself to just be direct. Shou continues, “After we kissed, I was… scared. Because I know that kiss meant something to both of us, but I wasn’t ready to admit I liked you. Admitting I liked you meant that something was going to change between us and I was really scared of that. I don’t like change, at all. I’ve dealt with change all my life and ever since meeting you things have been consistent, and I liked that.”
Shou sees a realization spark in Ritsu’s eyes and he finds himself feeling relieved. “What I did was stupid and all of this could’ve been talked about a lot sooner if I hadn’t just run out on you like that, but here we are.” He ends his little speech, waiting for Ritsu’s response with baited breath.
“Are you still scared of it?” Ritsu questions, making Shou blink.
“Of what?”
“Of change.”
Shou sucks in a breath, telling himself to be honest, “A little, yeah. I don’t wanna mess up and lose you, y’know?” He replies. “But… I’m starting to think that change can be a good thing, that it doesn’t always have to be scary. So if the change involves you?” Shou offers him a grin, “I’m not scared at all.”
He sees Ritsu sigh and chuckle, shaking his head. “Suzuki Shou, you are the world’s biggest idiot, but I guess that’s what I like about you.” Ritsu says, and Shou starts to feel hope blossom in his chest. “I’m still mad at you though, don’t forget that. You’ve got a lot of making up to do for the three days I was in turmoil over you.”
Shou barks a laugh, seeing that Ritsu is still as dramatic as ever. “Well how can I make it up to you?” He asks, unable to keep the grin off his face.
Ritsu hums before smiling coyly at him, “A date would be a nice start.”
“You’re kidding!” Shou laughs as he walks up the street, narrowly avoiding being barreled into by a five year old. The kid’s mom gives him an apologetic look before she runs after her child. “Mom did what ?!”
“I’m being completely serious, I assure you, Shou.” Is his father’s response, only making Shou laugh once again. “She called me as soon as you left and chewed me out for telling you about that prank.”
“To be fair, the teacher totally deserved it. His tests are horrible .” Shou replies, “But I can already imagine the lecture mom has in store for me when I see her this weekend…” He shivers at the thought. Mama Suzuki can be quite the terror when she lectures you.
“I tried to tell her to go easy on you, seeing as it was my influence.” His father replies.
“You know she’s not gonna listen, but thanks for trying at least, pops.” Shou glances behind him as he enters the MobDonalds doors. The plan is to grab some food before heading out to see Ritsu today. Apparently he wants to show Shou this really nice park he found, and Shou couldn’t be more excited.
“How are things going with that boyfriend of yours, son? I’ve been meaning to ask, and your mother keeps gushing about how polite he is.”
Shou chuckles as he moves to stand in line. There’s about two people in front of him. “Ritsu? He’s great. Going on a month strong and he hasn’t felt the urge to kill me yet.” He jokes, hearing his father’s chuckles from the other side of the phone.
“I’m glad to hear it. What about your friends, how are they?”
Shou scrunches his face in mock disgust as he steps up in line, the person in front of him walking up to the counter, “Misaki and Tanaka seem to have finally gotten together and it’s so gross dad. Tanaka waltz into art every day and has to declare his love for her and how ‘lucky he is’ and all that crap. I just feel bad for Misaki, she practically turns into a tomato whenever he does it!”
“They certainly seem like an interesting duo. You said they’re childhood friends, yes?”
“Mhm, they’ve known each other for a while.” Shou doesn’t even bother glancing at the menu in front of him. He’s been here enough times to have his order memorized.
“I look forward to when I get to meet them one day. They sound like good people from what you’ve told me.”
“They’re the best.” Shou grins. “Speaking of, are you almost done with that Claw thing? I think mom’s starting to get antsy about when you’re coming home.” He asks as he steps up. “Ah, hold on.” Shou gives his order and pays for the food before he takes a step to the side where other people are waiting for their orders.
“Shou.”
He glances at his hand which is holding his phone. “What’s up?”
“I’m proud of you, y’know.”
Damn him, he’s in the middle of a public place and he wants to get all sappy now ? Shou huffs, “Yeah, yeah, thanks.” He brushes it off, but hearing his dad say that does mean a lot to him.
His father chuckles, “I have to go now, but I’ll catch you later, Shou.”
“Kay, bye.” It doesn’t take long for his number to be called and Shou’s walking up front to grab his bag. He pockets his phone and starts to head towards the door when he spots a familiar flash of red from the corner of his eyes. He freezes.
There’s no way.
He turns back to one of the tables, and spots none other than his father, sipping on a cup of coffee. Shou’s eyes widen as soon as their eyes meet, and his father raises his hand to wave at him. Feet moving on their own, Shou walks over to his table, astonished.
“I-I thought you still had stuff to take of in America…” He says, voice shaking just a bit.
“I was able to wrap things up last week. Everything has been properly taken care of now, and I was given the clear to return home.” Toichiro explains, and Shou feels an odd burst of excitement in his chest.
“W-Wha… h-how long have you been back?!” Shou questions, mouth wide in shock.
“Just a few days. I’ve been trying to get my living situation sorted out.” His father replies.
Despite his shock, there’s a smile slowly growing on Shou’s face. “Does mom know?! Oh, she’s gonna freak when she finds out you’re back!” He exclaims.
Toichiro chuckles quietly, “Rest assured, I’ve already visited your mother. She knows I’m back.”
That only makes Shou’s smile brighten more. He glances at the seat across from his father hesitantly, unsure of if he should sit down or not. He does have to meet up with Ritsu soon, and who knows if his father already has other things planned for the afternoon.
As if sensing his son’s apprehension, Toichiro offers the seat to him, and Shou doesn’t hesitate to take him up on his offer. He sits down across from him, unable to keep the excitement off of his face. Shou leans forward in his seat, “Okay, you have to tell me everything .” He demands with excited eyes. “Was America cool? And how’d things go with your company? What’s the plan now?”
Toichiro offers his son a small smile of his own, “The plan now, is to be your father.” He answers, though he looks a bit uncertain. “That is, if you want me to be, of course.”
“Well duh . I wouldn’t have given you a second chance if I didn’t want you to be, old man.” Shou retorts, “Or is your old age starting to get to you?”
This time, Toichiro laughs and Shou grins at him. “Of course, how foolish of me to forget.”