Chapter Text
Shuichi strained to crank the faucet knobs of every sink in the boy’s bathroom. Cold water, hot water, it didn’t matter which. All of them had rust flecking the seals.
There were five sinks in the bathroom. Ten knobs. Shuichi tried to turn all of them on once, then twice, and then a final third time for luck’s sake.
“Shuichi?” a girl’s voice called from outside. “You, uh, you okay in there? All good?”
It was Kaede, the girl he had just met. Ultimate Pianist, she had said.
Shuichi took a moment to clear his throat. He kept his head down. His hands clenched and unclenched at his sides. He had to keep his arms away from his body. He wanted to adjust the brim of his hat, but couldn’t let his hands touch his clothes, not before he washed them.
He took a steadying breath through his mouth. The air had a bad taste to it, like a typical bathroom but cranked up to eleven with all the grime and disrepair.
“Okay, Shuichi?” Kaede called again. “You’re seriously making me consider peeking in there to see if you’re okay. I’m gonna do that if you don’t answer.” It was weird how she could sound both confident and concerned at the same time.
“I’m alright, I’m fine!” Shuichi had to strain his voice to be loud enough to be heard. “I just…” he trailed off.
This whole situation was bringing out the absolute worst in him, and Shuichi absolutely hated feeling as vulnerable as he did around a stranger like Kaede. He had already kicked down a panic attack when he had tumbled out of the locker. Even now it was still trying to bubble up in his chest.
Shuichi knew that if he didn’t wash his hands soon that all of that self-control was going to boil over and get him to break. He hated to admit it, but he was beat.
He balled his hands into fists and carefully walked to the bathroom door, head down.
The doorknob stared back at him. Shuichi glanced around to try and find a ream of paper towels or something, anything to cover his hand with to grab it. Nothing.
“Um, Kaede?”
“Yeah?” She must have been right outside the door with how clear her voice was.
Shuichi sighed. “Look, this is going to sound really stupid. I’m sorry.”
“No offense, but I kind of doubt that anything you say is going to be crazier than the last half hour has been.” Kaede laughed. Shuichi could tell it was forced. That, or just exhausted. He couldn’t blame her.
“Okay.” His hands felt like they were burning, like they weren’t even a part of him. “Can you open the door for me?”
“Uh, sure?” The door swung open towards the hallway, and Kaede was there giving him a puzzled look. “You sure you’re alright?”
He wasn’t, but that wasn’t for her to know.
Shuichi kept his head tilted down. He focused on Kaede’s chin rather than her eyes. “I’m fine,” he said. “Did any of the sinks in the girl’s bathroom have running water?”
Kaede let the door shut behind him. “A couple of them do, yeah, but the water smells kind of gross. And there’s only bar soap. What, do none of the ones in there have any?”
“No.” Shuichi knew his tone was coming off as clipped, but he was reaching his limit. All that was threading him together at this point was a bedrock of ingrained courtesy. “Is it okay if I go in there to use one?”
“I mean,” Kaede shrugged, “it’s not like there’s anyone in there. And even then, I kind of doubt anyone would care more about stuff like that than the fact that they’re in a nasty overgrown school with bear robots running around.”
Shuichi didn’t reply. His brain was too centered on how badly his palms were sweating and making his hands sticky.
“You need me to open the door for you again?” Kaede’s voice broke through the fog.
He felt himself nod and mumble a ‘thank you’ – felt his feet shuffle through the opened door. His ears could barely register Kaede telling him that one of working sinks was the one on the far right.
The sinks were all standard looking, but antiquated. The porcelain had spidery stress fractures all over it, and the faucet was covered in splotches that had probably been there for years. There was a soap dish for each sink filled with soap bars that had varying signs of use. All of them were shriveled and cracked to some extent.
Shuichi went for the furthest sink and turned the water on. The stream was weak and ice cold. It smelled like sulfur.
It didn’t matter. All that mattered was getting his hands clean, to get them to feel like part of himself again.
Shuichi worked methodically. He lathered his hands in the bar soap and counted to 30. He raked his fingernails over the backs of his hands and palms. He rinsed once, then twice.
Had there been paper towels, Shuichi would have taken the time to dry off, though he preferred air dryers. That was okay. He could work with this.
He washed his hands and went through the same routine a second time, lathering and rinsing.
Only after Shuichi had washed his hands a third time did he let himself relax. His hands were cherry red and wrinkled, but that wasn’t new for him. They were always chapped.
Wiping them on his slacks, Shuichi took the time to readjust his hat and smooth down his shirt.
Kaede was frowning when he finally left the bathroom. “You were in there for a while.” She prodded.
“Yeah, sorry.” Shuichi almost let it go there, but even if he couldn’t look at her eyes he could still see she was frowning at him. “Sorry, I’m just…I’m kind of on-edge with all of this.”
It was far from the full truth, but it would do for now.
Kaede didn’t look satisfied. “Well, if there’s anything I can do, let me know.”
“Right.” Shuichi faked a small smile. “Thanks.”
“Okay, so!” She clapped her hands together. “We already met that cosplayer girl – “
“Tsumugi.”
Kaede nodded. “Yeah, and she said that she saw some other people besides us, at least three, right?”
“But there’s probably more, and we’ve got no idea just how big this place is.”
“Let alone why we’re here.”
Shuichi felt himself calm down. Teasing out a problem always helped him get away from his own head.
It didn’t last. A shrill scream rang out from down the hall, followed by delighted laughter.
Shuichi and Kaede looked at each other. For the first time since meeting her, he looked her in the eye.
Without exchanging a word, they ran.