Chapter Text
Victor didn’t prefer his parents to yell right outside his door.
They usually took it out to the patio or settled it in his father’s study, a place where they could attempt to disguise their dispute. Guess that wasn’t in the cards tonight.
Victor laid on his bed, led pencil against his smudged sketchbook. The thing was falling apart at the seams from excessive use. Page after page loaded with notes and drawings from Victor’s favorite comic books and tv shows.
The sketchbook always surfaced itself when his parents argued, an easy escape from the world around him. The boy’s dark hair had come loose from the gel keeping it back, strands of it covering his eyes and making him tuck it back over and over.
He outlined the figure on the page with-
“I don’t even know why I slave around this damn house when I have to deal with two people who have never respected me!”
-a bold stroke of his pen making the line art thick and-
“You wonder why I don’t respect you? Well, damn, Marie, you pamper the kid like he’s royalty when I don’t even share genetic material with the kid!”
-smooth
They continued to argue. About him. Victor always knew it had to do with him. His body, hobbies, interests, anything was on the table for them to see as a life changing issue. Did other parents worry about their kids like this? He didn’t really know because no one at school invited him to come over or vice versa. You learn pretty quickly to not invite people over with parents like his. Parents who never knew when to give him a moment of peace-
“Hey, baby?”
Victor, broken out of his focus, glanced up to his door from his sketchbook. A woman in a pink, fluffy robe stood there, empty wine glass in one hand and a cigarette in the other. She leaned against his doorway, puffing out the last of her cigarette smoke.
“Hey.” Victor said, rolling over on his quilted bed cover, facing away from her.
“You want some food?”
“Is it salad?”
“Of course, V.”
“No, thanks.”
She went quiet, taking a seat down on his bedside. The teen laying in the bed went stiff, he could hear her tapping her nails on the top of the foot board.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
“What’s this you're drawing?”
That’s how she always got him. They had nothing in common so the easiest way to comfort him was giving him attention for the things he liked. Typical Marie, but typical him as well.
The brunette rolled over and picked up the sketchbook, giving her a better look at the drawing he had been working on all week.
“It’s my idea for a hero costume!”
The hero was drawn in a crude style reminiscent of Victor’s favorite shows Sargent Saturn and Fisher x Fisher. The hero wore a sharp lab coat decked out with spikes and belts. The hero held a conical flask with bright purple liquid in it that bubbled. The hero also had a little rat on his shoulder with green fur, his favorite color. Marie grimaced.
“This... is your hero design?”
“Yeah, it’s like a science based thing! Of course, I’ll still use my powers but there are all kinds of heroes that use other things too.” The teen flipped the page to show more doodles of the design, some having slight variations.
“Listen, dear.”
Victor immediately tensed up, nothing good came from his mom using ‘dear’.
Marie’s scooted over a bit, away from Victor. “Don’t you want to go with something more… strength based? Like your father and I, we’ve always worked to keep ourselves in shape and be strong heroes. That is what gets you far in the hero world.”
Victor stared up at her, her eyes were cold and serious, she didn’t want to talk about this anymore. Her blonde hair was tucked behind her ears, she didn’t want to even be in here anymore.
“You know I love you, honey.”
Her thin, sharp lips were brought up into a tight smile as they looked at each other. Victor wanted to say his thoughts, the doubt that crept in when she insisted that statement was truthful.
“I know.”
Marie stood up, holding the sketchbook as she walked towards the door. Her eyes bore into the paper, Victor worried it would burst into flames in a second. Marie placed the drawing on the desk, facing the hero to the wood. She glanced back at Victor whose soul shrunk into the pit of his stomach, overwhelmed with anxiety. He knew she didn’t want him anywhere near that drawing again.
“Good night, Victor. Sleep tight.”
Victor sat there staring at the desk, at his drawing.
“Don’t worry, Professor. I’m gonna finish you tomorrow.”
“Ah, Professor Venomous!”
At about two that afternoon, Professor Venomous and Lord Boxman were greeted by water pouring into the lobby of Boxmore. The villains looked out their window, greeted by a giant tuna swimming past. They were also greeted by a scuba diver swimming away from the bodega with three figures being dragged behind them. Boxman and Venomous groaned, realizing the villain they would have to deal with. After several Darrells sealed up any possible leaks in Boxmore, they marched upstairs at their father’s command, including the other Voxmore children. Raymond, Shannon, and Darell assembled themselves into a boat, driving after the villain with a grumpy fink in tow, eventually arriving at their destination. Venomous held her in his lap as Boxman steered the boat further into Lakewood.
Now, the employees of Gar’s Bodega sat, tied up in ribbons of kelp, at the bottom of the newest ocean in the neutral zone. An ocean that consisted of the entirety of Lakewood, in fact. Which Rad, Enid, and KO could all thank the area’s newest villain for.
“Ah, Acid Reeflux.”
Venomous sunk down from the surface, adorned in large, weighted sandals and swim trunks, including, of course, his signature lab coat. The sandals brought him to the sandy sea floor, next to the struggling heroes who all let out a shout that vaguely sounded like ‘Professor?!’.
“Acid Reeflux? What kind of name is that!” Shouted another figure sinking down at a much quicker speed, next to Venomous. Of course, where the Professor was, he wasn’t far to follow. Boxman hit the sand with a groan of pain, quickly helped up by Venomous. Boxman led out of a cough and straightened his swim shorts, violently.
“As much as I enjoy over the top villainy,” Venomous started, the man beside him puffing up with pride, “Attacking the plaza and wreaking general mayhem in Lakewood is our job, and we aren’t keen on giving up our position.”
Acid Reeflux let out a loud, obnoxious laugh, well, as loud as you can be with a snorkel and mask on. She flapped her scuba flippers in amusement and swam closer to the couple. “And what do you plan on doing about it? I have the entirety of plaza underwater! Under my control! Under my rei-“
“Okay I know you're trying to do your whole ‘the world is mine villain monologue thing’ but… what kind of name is Acid Reeflux? Boxman wheezed out the last part, leaning on his boyfriend’s side to prevent himself from falling over.
Venomous let out a low chuckle, “I honestly expected something more aquatic.”
“Yeah, like Siereen or Gulper Neil!”
While the two continued ripping Acid Reeflux into tiny pieces, the villain fumed and slowly began swimming over to the couple with intention to kill.
“Where did you even get that name?” Questioned Boxman.
“First of all, it is aquatic! Second, it’s a play on words!”
Boxman cringed with a snarky laugh following, “A pun related villain name? I thought the board made people quit doing that years ago!”
“What’s the pun away?”
Reeflux had steam shooting out of her ears, until she broke out into a coy smile. “How about I show you?”
Taking a deep breath, the villain spat lava, heading directly towards the couple who dodged it last moment. The lava quickly hardened into a hard, molten rock which made the couple look at each other in realization.
“Oooohhh,”
“Like heartburn.
“So it’s Acid Reeflux, not reflux.”
“That probably would be better on paper than said out loud.”
“Oh my cob, would you two just shut up!? I have never, in all my years of villainy met a more annoying pair of villains in my life. Is that how you defeat heroes? By talking their ear off? Especially you, Boxman! Do you ever shut your trap!”
At this Venomous’ face changed from smug amusement to a sering gaze of resentment. The man pulled his watch up to his face, pressing the button on the side and giving a stern command.
“Fink, drop the torpedo.”
“Eye eye, boss!”
While Reeflux continued her lengthy rant, a child swim torpedo toy pierced the surface of the water and headed straight for the back of her head. Boxman and Venomous watched the torpedo shoot down and gave a countdown as it made its way to Reeflux. The torpedo hit reflux and floated down to the ocean floor.
“Ow! Did you just hit me with a toy torped-”
In a moment, a deep green substance covered the villain head to toe, making it impossible to move. She kicked her legs in protest as she sunk to the sand below, landing next to KO, Rad, and Enid with a muffled scream. The diver was left kicking herself in circles while Boxman and Venomous stomped over to where she was wiggling.
“We’ll just be taking this,” chided the cyborg as he reached into the slimy substance and grabbed the remote control pack on her hip. He gagged while pulling it out of the goo and shook what remained of it off violently, handing off the electronic mechanism.
“As much fun as this has been Reeflux, my boyfriend and I have a date with the new Files-Forensic episode.”
“Not only is it about murder, but cannibalism too!” Boxman exclaimed grabbing onto his partner in excitement. The other man gave out a low peased chuckle as he did.
Venomous gave the large red button on the device as smack as the water around them hummed with life before-poof- it was gone as quickly as it came. Somewhere out in the sea the large chuck of ocean body made its way back home, causing a small tidal wave to capsize a few fishing boats. Boxman and Venomous casually stepped out of the way as Boxmore’s Luxury FIshing boat, made up of Darrell, Raymond, and Shannon, hit the ground with a frightened Fink on board, her swim floating cushioning the impact. The employees of Gar’s bodega hit the ground with a thud, still wrapped up in Reefulx’s artificial kelp.
“Oh, let me help you with that.” Venomous said before Boxman could protest, pulling out his modified molecule shifting ray gun and evaporating the kelp from its grip on each hero. He blew off the smoke before giving it twirl and shocking it into its holster.
“You just did that to show off,” grumbled Boxman, crossing his arms.
Enid, glanced at the two with a confused look as she stood up off the ground, brushing off any remaining kelp. “As grateful as I am for the help, what is that stuff?”. She pointed to the green gel encasing Reeflux as she continued to struggle and shout.
“Ah, that is my own personal project I’ve been working on. A genetic combination of spider silk and algae. Great for holding people still, especially minions who won’t brush their teeth.”
“Hey, I heard that!” squealed Fink as she made a beeline for the two, ready to tackle.
Boxman squinted at the heroes as he held Fink back with one hand on her large, mint head, “How were you losers breathing underwater?”
“Enid used her witch magic!” Rad bragged, pulling Enid into a headlock and an aggressive noogie.
“I want a noogie!” whimpered KO, jumping at Rad’s side. The alien let Enid go and picked up the 6-11 year old before heading to noogie town. Enid rubbed her head as she gazed as the villains and asked,
“How did you two breathe underwater? Last time I checked, neither of you were in the magic biz.”
P
The pair gave two giant smiles as they pulled out a small box of gum from their bathing suit pockets.
“We’re so glad you asked!” Boxman beamed, “This is Boxmore’s newest product, Boxmore Big Chew: Aqua Edition!”
“It’s...gum?” Rad questioned, letting go of KO.
“Oh, not just any gum. It’s a special formula of my own design that can allow you to breath without taking in any air for 2 hours.” Venomous spat out the piece he was currently chewing into the wrapper stashing it away to trash later. “Plus it has an amazing berry flavor.”
“And the value pack only costs $8.99!”
“But make sure not to get it in your hair! It’s impossible to get out.” grumbled Fink from her place on Venomous’ leg, blowing a large bubble with the gum and giving it a pop.
An alarm buzzed on Professor Venomous' watch, which he glanced at before doing a rapid double take.
“Boxy, the meeting!”
Boxman’s eyes grew wide before pulling out a remote and smashing a button, his desk hurtling toward the pair.
“DARRELL, SHANNON, RAYMOND, FINK, GET ON!”
“Wait!” KO yelped, “Thank you for helping us!”
Boxman snorted at the statement, “Helped you? We just didn’t want Boxmore to be flooded! It would have cost us a fortune!”
The Voxy bunch loaded up on the cramped desk before taking off, leaving a trail behind them.
“It was a nice gesture, though!” shouted KO, waving them goodbye.
“Uh, guys? What are we supposed to do with her?” Rad pointed to the struggling villain, wiggling about.
“Maybe a new storefront decoration?”
“Shit, shit, shit!”
The Professor stomped down the halls of Boxmore, past hoards of Darrell’s, equipped with mops and buckets. The man was praying to Cob above that his wardrobe didn’t get ruined, he was not attending a meeting in swim trunks!
Venomous stormed into Boxmore’s master bedroom, slamming open his closet doors and giving each article of clothing a pat down to make sure they were bone dry. He snatched a fresh turtleneck and overcoat off of the hanger and threw them on, rushing down the hall to Boxmore’s “professional meeting room” which was usually just used for family game nights and settling conflicts.
Venomous slid out the door after running some gel threw it, slicking it back to its usual style. As he barrelled into the hall, Boxman collided into him with a surprised squawk.
“Oh! Sorry, Boxy!” Boxman stepped back to observe the man, making sure to keep his mouth shut that the man was most definitely still wearing his swim trunks from earlier with the turtle neck.
Venomous arrived at the meeting room, turning on the holo screen before taking a deep breath and sitting down. Hopefully, this meeting would be over quick and he could head back to getting his afternoon nap-
“Ah, Professor, quite unusual for you to be late to a meeting.” snarked Billiam Milliam over the screen
“Well, Boxmore had a bit of a flooding problem I needed to attend to. Sorry for the delay.”
“Does that happen often over at Boxmore? Flooding problems?”
Venomous put on a large, uncomfortable grin and let out a forced laugh at the statement. “Oh no, it was highly unusual. Now can we get to business?”
The meeting was nearly 20 minutes long which, in his opinion, was too long to be receiving thinly veiled criticism about his personal life and business affairs. At about fifteen minutes in, Venomous heard the door creak open, he looked up to see his partner in crime standing there with a mug and a clipboard. Boxman gave an adorably awkward wave and quietly shuffled over to him while the villains on the screen continued to blab. Ven loved it when Boxman sat with him during the antagonising process of villain meetings. Someone was bound to go on some long monologue about finances or funding, which he and his boyfriend just couldn’t stand. Weren’t they villains? Where was the talk of world domination? Where were the shenanigans? The panache? Boxman always made it a little more tolerable, making hilarious comments and attempting to play footsie under the meeting table. He set the mug down and pulled a chair up next to his partner, planting a kiss on cheek. But shortly after Boxman came into the Holo screen frame, the board immediately shut up.
“Oh, hello, Boxman.” Cosma said, downing her drink as Billiam’s eyes almost rolled into the back of his head.
“Hey, guys.” Boxman said with a confident smirk, leaning against Venomous in the most obnoxious way possible. He looked down at the cyborg with a raised eyebrow and rolled his eyes. What a show off. Ever since they started dating, his Boxman would always make it very clear to the board of villains the nature of him and Professor Venomous’ relationship. When they got invited to villain parties, all Boxman would do was brag about how his life was going and how he was so lucky to have his amazing, smart, successful and handsome boyfriend. The man was shameless.
But so was Venomous, so he couldn’t complain.
“Well, since our meeting is coming to close and both of you are here.” Cosma whipped out a file, leafing through it and pulling out a page. Venomous could tell his business partner was getting tense. News from the board involving them was, usually, never good. Venomous leaned over and put a hand on his partner’s and gave a squeeze of comfort.
“There have been several new villains who are entering the field that we feel would be benefited by your services.”
The couple looked at each other in shock. The board… was actually trying to help them?
“They… wanna buy Boxmore bots?” Boxmore said, slightly shocked but also excited. More customers meant more money, of course.
“Well, that along with Venomous’ commissions.”
Venomous glared at Billiam with a stare that would kill a man not made out of solid gold, “Commissions? Billiam, you know as well as I do that I stopped doing those long ago after I built up a steady client base.”
“Oh, did I know that?” Billiam said in a pseudo innocent tone, “Because nearly half of those villains were dying to get their hands on your homemade bio-tech.”
The professor groaned and rubbed his temples. He had despised doing commissions for some fresh meat he barely knew. It felt like he was stepping down a level, forcing himself to cater to someone else’s whims.
He had had enough of that in his childhood.
Though, he supposed it was slightly different now. He had a family after all and with Lakewood and Boxmore being flooded, the production line would no doubt be behind in shipments. It would take them months to get back on track.
“I’ll think about it.”
“Atta boy!”
“So, who exactly are these new villains?” Said Boxman, chewing on the end of one of Venomous’ pens with vigor.
Comsa then began reading down the paper and listing off each villain, Boxman wrote them down in his clipboard while Venomous stared outside, still contemplating his commissions situation. That was the last thing he wanted to think about today. Why couldn’t he be in bed napping? It felt as if this day was just one bad thing after the other.
Venomous snapped out of his dissociative state when Cosma quit reading and Boxman slammed his clipboard to the table with satisfaction.
“Aaaaannndd...done! Well, thank you so much for that list of terrible names and horrible puns! We’ll be sure to contact them!” He said with aggressive cheerfulness, “Toodles!”
Boxman slammed the holo screen projector down, “Cob, I hate those people.”
Venomous let out a loud laugh at that which made Boxman puff up with pride. The couple headed to their room to get a post ‘saving Lakewood for your own personal gain and business meeting’ nap. Venomous didn’t even bother to change, throwing himself onto the bed with a groan while Boxman stripped down to a comfy T-shirt, continuing to flip through the clipboard and chewing on the pen.
“Stop chewing on that pen, you're gonna get ink on the bed.”
“Pfft, no I’m not!”
“Well, then how about you come nap with me so we can cuddle.”
Boxman, a constant sucker for physical affection, threw the pen and board across the room, possibly breaking something, and threw himself at Venomous’ side.
“Set the alarm for 30 minutes.”
“That’s way too long, PV. You’ll be all kinds of groggy.”
“Fine, 20.”
After setting the alarm, Boxman wrapped his arms and legs around his boyfriend with a tight squeeze. Venomous hummed at the gesture, a gesture he definitely wouldn’t have been okay with at the beginning of their business partnership, and nuzzled the man’s soft neck; Boxman let out a surprised yelp.
“You know… you don’t have to do the commissions if you don’t want to.” He said to Venomous in a careful tone. “I know that isn’t something you really enjoyed doing. You're more of a personal projects guy.”
Venomous sighed, he really didn’t want to talk about anything right now but he knew it was better to get it out of the way. Like ripping a bandage off, right?
“You know me well, Boxy. But… I think I might do it. I’m at a different stage of my life right now and doing much better than when I built low level villains tentacle canons. Plus, it’ll be good for business.”
“Not everything is about business, Ven! I want you to be...happy! Here and… with me.” Boxman said the last part as quickly as possible, obviously realizing how sappy the statement was. Venomous adored Boxman’s constant cheesy, sappy statements.
“I am happy, Box. Making some new villains ray isn’t gonna change that.”
“Well, I trust you.”
“I’m glad you do.”
“The fact you’ll have to make stuff for some of the absolute amateurs on that list. Worst names ever.”
“What were a few you’d give the ‘Boxman F tier’ seal of approval?” Venomous said with a laugh, he honestly didn’t catch half of the names.
“Cracker and Jack. Little Bo Nightmare Doom Bringer. All kinds of corny stuff like that!” Boxman complained, “And don’t even get me started on Black Widow.”
Venomous sat up in his elbow and gave the ranting man a questionable look. “That’s not that terrible of a name, the two before it were much worse.”
“It’s just… there’s already a hero named Black Widow! So why would you choose the same thing? Just seems uncreative. Villains these days I’m telling ya.”
“Well, if that Black Widow comes sniffing around, feel free to tell her off and let her know just how bad her name is, I give you my full approval.”
Boxman let out a chuckle and went back to snuggling into his boyfriend, snoring in seconds. Venomous slowly slipped unconscious, the last thought on his mind being,
“Yeah, Black Widow is a bad villain name.”