Chapter Text
Zagreus hadn't meant to cause an upset in the status quo. Now that he was an ocean away from his father, he had just wanted to try out things he had been denied for so long. The audition was purely on a whim. He saw the poster advertising it, and he didn't have anything better to do that day.
How was he supposed to know he'd be cast as a lead?
The first first-year to ever have that honor bestowed?
And how was he to know how much distaste that casting would bring to the mouths of all the other students in the program?
They had invited him to the frat house not out of the goodness of their hearts but out of a sense of obligation. A soon-to-be-graduate had nominated him for entry to the fraternity, and, whether by joke or fate, they had voted him in. And now he had to perform in front of a concentration of those who only held disdain in their hearts for him.
It was incredibly isolating. He'd come to this country for a fresh start, even though he had had to lie to his father and say that the scholarship was for academics rather than awarded due to a drum solo audition tape. Zagreus had re-routed as much correspondence as possible to himself to keep things under wraps, and he had felt like he was walking on a razor’s edge long before this stage performance threw him into the limelight.
Zagreus had very nearly rejected the membership offer due to how much ill will was being thrown his way. First years never get invited to join, they never ace auditions right out of the gate, they never become the focus of the campus. That was the realm of third and fourth-year students with more experience under their belts. The only reason Zagreus hadn’t flat-out said no was the possibility of networking. The local frat members may not be his biggest fans, but the list of prominent actors, singers, and musicians who retain a lifelong connection was too great to ignore.
He hoped it would be enough to keep him in this country and away from his father once he graduated.
Sighing, he tugged on his favorite red beanie as he walked to the dormitory exit. Just once, he wanted something simple to happen that brought him joy instead of dread. Zagreus was very, very tired of having words of contempt thrown either directly to his face or in a roundabout way through the rumor mill.
The other students going to the party were taking the campus shuttle to the house, and he could see them queueing up at the stop. Zagreus paused for a moment before turning and walking the other way. He’ll go by foot. It'll take longer, but at least he doesn’t have to deal with the whispers and elbow nudges.
***
Thalia met him at the door when he finally arrived 20 minutes later. Even though Zagreus greeted her with a smile, she just looked cooly down her nose at him.
“You were supposed to dress up,” she said by way of hello, begrudgingly stepping aside to let him in.
“Didn’t hear anything about that, sorry.” A blatant lie. Zagreus had, in fact, heard about the dress code for inductees. He just didn’t care enough to make the effort. Besides, it’s just a house party. Everyone should be wearing jeans and hoodies just like him, not dressed like they’re going to a country club wedding.
Thalia harrumphed as she shut the door behind him. To his absolute dismay, the house was packed to bursting with students, all of whom surely had shown up to see him make an ass of himself on stage. “Just so you’re aware, there are students here from other universities in addition to our own. Don’t go embarrassing us in front of them tonight, we have a reputation to uphold.”
A reputation for what, exactly? Zagreus looked around, seeing no one who could even remotely be considered a professional in the industry amongst the sea of early 20-somethings. He did hope, though, that some of the students from the other universities would be more open to talking to him. His recent reputation shouldn’t have traveled outside the campus. Instead of voicing these thoughts, he simply nodded and started to make his way through the crowd to the kitchen. He needed something to calm the anxiety brewing below the surface, and even a cheap frat beer would be helpful right now.
***
The kitchen had been a nightmare to navigate, but finally, Zagreus managed to snag a beer. He settled in a corner between the living room, where the stage was set up, and the kitchen. It was a prime spot to observe the comings and goings of everyone while still staying relatively hidden.
The front door opened once again, and even more people piled into the house. Zagreus had never seen anyone from this group before and were probably some of the students from other universities he had been warned about. They looked a bit older than most of the others here, and the man in the lead rushed over to Thalia almost immediately. Zagreus had heard that Thalia was supposedly seeing some medical student, and he guessed that this was the guy. He crinkled his nose at how the guy threw his arm around her waist and started steering her around as if she were more trophy than human. Though he may not be the biggest fan of Thalia personally, he still didn’t like the bizarrely possessive attitude he was seeing. The group started coming his way, and he shuffled a bit further out of sight towards an exit. Nothing would make him happier than avoiding Thalia for as long as possible.
Zagreus exited through the closest door and found himself on the back patio, thankful that it was sparsely populated due to the chilly night. He only had to stay at the party until his performance was over. Unfortunately, Thalia had kept the details of that a secret from him, even what time he would go on, only sending part of a duet over for him to learn. The piece was less than thrilling but he studied it all the same. Leaning back against the patio railing, Zagreus hummed some bars to himself as he gazed up at the oversized frat house.
All the lights were on, making it seem more like one of those Christmas glass houses grandmothers like to set up for the holidays instead of an actual place where people lived. The lights were mostly filtered through drawn curtains, but one window in particular caught his attention. At first, he wasn't sure why, but after a moment he realized that it was because it was the only open window. Zagreus found himself oddly compelled to go investigate the window. Almost as though something was pulling him in that direction.
He drained his can of beer but kept holding it when he reentered the house. It acted almost like a shield between himself and the other partygoers. Anyone who might have been tempted to offer him a drink wouldn't, as he already had one. Zagreus waved and nodded to a few classmates that he was acquainted with while drifting through the overcrowded living room. On the stairs it became a bit easier to move, the crowd thinning more and more the higher he climbed.
And then he found himself at the top of the stairs with nowhere else to go. The floor was abandoned with the exception of those using the bathroom due to the ones on the lower floors having a long queue. As a result, Zagreus quickly found the window in question.
At the far end of the hall, a man dressed in all black was curled up on the window bench, sketching in a sketchbook and ignoring everything going on around him. His face was obscured by a curtain of curly hair, and Zagreus was fascinated by the unusual shade. It wasn't quite blonde and wasn't quite brown, and if he tilted his head, the hall light highlighted streaks that appeared to shine silver. He found he desperately wanted to talk to this man, if only to commiserate on finding themselves solo at such a packed event.
Zagreus quickly retraced his steps back to the kitchen. It would be too awkward to just walk up without something to offer, wouldn't it? It would be best to have something like a drink to open the conversation with. His impatience to get to the kitchen was apparent in the way he gently pushed people aside, unlike earlier when he had tried to keep a wide berth. By the time he finally arrived, Zagreus was starting to second-guess his plan. He had been so eager to talk to someone that he hadn't really considered if the guy had been hiding for a reason. Plus, he wasn't sure how long he would have to talk, the live performances had started up just as he set foot over the kitchen threshold. Sighing, he rummaged around the kitchen for whatever scraps had been left behind, the refrigerator and cupboards emptied as though a plague of locusts had swept through. At the very back of the refrigerator, Zagreus spotted two microbrew cans. They probably were reserved for a resident, but he grabbed them anyway.
On the way to the stairs, he saw the one med school student being escorted to the door, Thalia yelling something at his back. Zagreus took one look at the scene and decided it would be wise to not get involved. It was none of his business.
***
The man by the window hadn't moved an iota from the time Zagreus left to the time he returned. Zagreus coughed a little and leaned against the wall, hoping to get his attention while remaining casual. When that didn't work, he tried saying, "Hello, there!" Unfortunately, that also fell on deaf ears. Exasperated and hands growing cold, Zagreus tapped the man on the shoulder with one of the beer cans.
He wasn't sure what he had expected to happen, but the way the man had nearly jumped out of his skin in surprise hadn't been it. “Easy there, just figured you’d want a drink.”
The man looked up at Zagreus, down to the beers, and back again. Zagreus felt his breath catch in his throat. His eyes were a gorgeous amber color he had never seen before, and they stood out starkly against his dark skin. The man arched his eyebrow, the question plain on his face.
Zagreus shrugged as nonchalantly as he could. “You’ve been up here drawing a while, thought you might like something is all.”
The response caused the eyebrow to drift even higher before settling back to a neutral position. He seemed vaguely annoyed, and Zagreus was just about to apologize for interrupting whatever it was he had been working on when the man spoke, voice soft and melodic. “Um, yeah, thanks.”
The man cautiously accepted one of the beers, and Zagreus put his metaphorical foot in the door before the man could close off completely again. He gestured to the bench. “Mind if I join you for a minute?”
A shrug with a hand wave was the only response given, but that was enough for Zagreus. Trying his best not to look too eager, he sat across from the man on the bench. Leaning against the wall, Zagreus unceremoniously adjusted himself so one leg was dangling off the bench. The man opened the beer and took a sip, eyes never leaving Zagreus' face. The gaze was analytical and Zagreus felt like he was under a microscope. Zagreus coughed into his hand to mask his fidgeting under the stare.
Almost immediately, the man's eyes dropped to the beer in his hands. "So," the man started, shifting the beer from hand to hand. "Um, why?"
Zagreus tilted his head, unsure of what was being asked of him. "Why what?"
“I mean, I’m not exactly in the middle of the action, so bringing me this was pretty out of the way, wasn’t it?” The man stopped fiddling with the can and fixed those amber eyes back on Zagreus, once again scrutinizing him. But this time Zagreus didn't feel the same level of discomfort as before. The man hadn’t sounded annoyed and was at least trying to hold a conversation.
"Ah." Zagreus awkwardly scratched at his neck. He hadn't expected to be called out so quickly on his motivations. The guy wasn’t one to beat around the bush, so Zagreus opted to just tell the truth. “I saw you sitting here for so long, it got me curious. So the beer is more a way for me to learn a little about you, if that makes sense?”
“I...guess? I’m not sure what you’d want to know, though," the man said as he sipped at his beer. Zagreus was studying his posture, unsure if the guy was uncomfortable with him or just socially awkward in general.
He hummed as he considered the question. Just why had he been so eager to talk to this person and this person alone? Zagreus didn’t know if he would ever encounter him again, but that wasn’t the right answer. Truth be told, he didn’t even know where to begin with his own feelings on the matter, let alone have the words to answer the man’s query.
Zagreus’ eyes fell to the sketchbook. Maybe he could use that. “Well, how’s this for starters? I haven’t seen you around my classes or at any performances before, so clearly you’re not the performing arts type. But you were sketching, so does that make you one of the studio art people?”
The man looked down at the sketchbook with surprise, as if only now registering that he was holding it. He shifted awkwardly, setting the book aside. “Um, no, actually. I’m a first-year med student from the next university over.”
“Oh-ho!” Zagreus could feel his eyes widening at the idea that someone who looked so much like a goth artist type could be in medical school. He could feel his heart fall a little at the lack of common ground they shared. Ideally, he would have asked more about his art and compared it to his own artistic endeavors. From there, maybe they would have had an easier time getting to know one another. Unsure what else to say, Zagreus spat out in a rush, “I had heard there were a few med students floating about tonight. A little while ago one of them caused some kinda commotion and they made him leave. Wouldn’t have associated them with you, though.”
“Is that a bad or good thing?” The man had groaned as he asked.
“I think it's good? They all seemed a little stuck-up in comparison to everyone else here. Looking-down-their-nose types.”
“I can see that. A lot of them come from fairly well-to-do families given the reputation of the school.”
“Are you lumped into that category?” Zagreus smirked as he asked, anticipating an answer of a rebellious rich boy asserting independence however he could. Someone much like himself. To his surprise, the man rolled his eyes.
“I’m definitely not from a family of corporate executives, if that’s what you mean.”
Zagreus let out a low whistle, relieved. If the guy wasn’t from a business family, maybe there was hope for a friendship after all. “Good to know! Executives tend to be very up their own ass, in my experience.” He softly chuckled to himself, thinking back to the kind of company his father kept. As Zagreus took a drink of his beer, the man asked a question of his own.
“You said you hadn’t seen me in your classes. Are you one of the musical theater majors, then?”
“Sorta, I’m in music performance and composition. I originally thought I would just do composition or something, but I landed a part for the semester musical performance that was apparently a big deal? And now, here I am. You have to get invited to be a part of this fraternity on merit or whatever, I guess I made the cut. Catch is that I need to add that additional performance major to stay in.” Zagreus was surprised at how easily the words flowed out of him. At how easy it was to speak about this to someone he had only just met.
“Well, seems like you must be talented if they invited you to join so quickly. Are you a first-year student?”
“Yeah, and an international one to boot. A lot of people aren’t thrilled about it.” Zagreus rolled his eyes and muttered under his breath that his father was especially wasn’t happy, but that was more for his going overseas at this point.
“Why wouldn't they be?”
“Well, it’s competitive here. Usually, it takes until third year to get invited into this thing as a proper member. On top of that, I’m here on scholarship, so that’s another strike against me, I guess?” Zagreus paused, flicking the tab on the can as the full weight of the animosity of his fellow students crashed down on him. He couldn’t really blame them. He was a newcomer, a hobbyist in their eyes. They had dedicated countless hours and years of their lives trying to be the best. He shook his head to clear those thoughts before continuing. “Anyway, they’re doing their induction ceremony tonight, which is why the party is way bigger than it would normally be. All the new members need to perform something preassigned to them.”
“That’s dumb. I meant the strikes against you, not the performance thing,” the guy added on quickly, apparently worried that he had offended somehow. Zagreus smiled at that, pleased that the man cared enough to clarify.
“No worries, I gathered as much! But whatever, it’ll let me keep my scholarship and visa so I can stay here.” Zagreus trailed off and removed his beer tab, dropping it into the now-empty can. His thoughts drifted to how hard it had been to prove that he hadn’t faked his acceptance and scholarship and all the fights with his father before finally boarding the taxi to the airport. He hadn’t expected to be met with comparable hostility here, but it just seemed to follow him wherever he went.
The small thud of a can being set down brought Zagreus back to the man in front of him. He gave a small, apologetic smile. “Sorry about that, mate. Got a bit in my own head there. Anyway-”
“There you are!” Zagreus jumped and internally groaned at the voice. Of course she would show up right when he was getting in the groove of conversing with a stupidly attractive stranger. Why wouldn’t she?
“Hey, Thalia...”
She rudely cut him off with a wave of her hand, speaking over him as though her time was more important than anyone else’s. “You’re gonna be on once the next two numbers are done, so get downstairs as soon as you can.” Thalia turned on her heel as dramatically as possible, nose in the air. Zagreus rolled his eyes at her back. “Your duet partner will be a surprise, but I trust you prepared your part appropriately.”
As she walked away, Zagreus brought two fingers to his forehead in a salute. “Yes, ma’am.” Silently, he berated himself about whether or not he had prepared enough for whatever it is he was about to do. Then again, he was sure that was her intention behind that statement. If he messed up, the fraternity could rescind their membership offer.
At that moment, the man chose to stand up and stretch. Zagreus’ train of thought completely derailed, utterly distracted by someone who could be so unnaturally beautiful but also incredibly tall. How had he missed this guy when he entered with those other med students? He would have stood out without trying.
And so Zagreus said the first thing that came to mind. “Wow, you’re really tall.”
The man looked down at him, his head tilt causing long curls to cascade over both shoulders, catching the light and shimmering silver. “Um, yeah?”
Zagreus could feel himself starting to blush at how weird he had just made things. He chuckled, trying to diffuse any misgivings the guy might have about whether he had just had a conversation with someone off their rocker. “Sorry, you were just sitting with your legs tucked in so it didn’t really register to me. I made that awkward, didn’t I?”
“It’s fine. Do you know where the bathroom is, by chance? I’m probably gonna head back home soon.”
Yep, Zagreus had definitely screwed it all up if the guy was going to leave so quickly. Holding in a sad sigh, he tried to hide the disappointment in his voice when he responded. “Yep, third door down on your right. I can watch your stuff, if you want…?”
The man shook his head. “No need, I know you need to get downstairs before that Thalia comes up to drag you down herself.”
It was an accurate observation from just a short exchange. A bit eerie, if Zagreus were being honest. It seemed like he had an unnaturally keen sense of how to read people, and that might have been why he opted to hide in the first place.
“Yeah, true...well, it was good talking to you! Hopefully I’ll see you around again?” Zagreus couldn’t conceal the hope in his voice as he stood and extended a hand. The man responded in kind with his right hand, Zagreus noting that there were tattoos of an eye and butterflies on the skin between his fingers. They had been hidden before by the way the man had gripped the can. Zagreus smiled brightly, giving the man’s hand a small squeeze. He really, really wanted to see this guy again.
“Um, yeah. I’ll maybe see you around?” And with that, the man went down the hall to the bathroom, closing the door behind him.
Zagreus hovered, torn between waiting for the guy to emerge from the bathroom like a deranged stalker and going down to the living room and ripping the bandaid off this cursed performance. He scratched at his head, fingers brushing the knit of his beanie when he got an idea.
Moving quickly, Zagreus took off his beanie. He opened the man’s bag, eying the contents quickly before grabbing a handful of colored pencils. He sorted through them quickly before selecting a red one. Red pencil, red beanie. Zagreus really hoped this was enough of an association. He scribbled his note on the next blank page in the sketchbook.
In the event you feel like returning my hat - XXX-XXX-XXXX
He tucked all the colored pencils into the beanie and rolled it up, stowing it back in the bag and replacing everything as it had been found. Zagreus took the two empty cans with him as he headed downstairs, heart thumping loudly in his chest, but not from pre-performance jitters.
***
Thalia had partnered Zagreus with a 4th-year male fraternity member, one he hadn’t met before. His hair had gotten long, and without the beanie to contain it, it was flowing all around his face and irritating his neck. He could almost hear Thalia’s eye roll as he flipped the hair off his skin yet again. Her job was to introduce the acts, not to judge Zagreus for finding his own hair distracting.
His partner seemed decent enough. When they were announced as the next act, he was quick to lean over and offer a few tidbits about how he was going to approach the song. It allowed Zagreus to think about how he could play off that approach. By the time they gave the signal to start, he had everything planned out.
One thing that always had irritated his father was Zagreus’ seemingly incessant humming and fidgeting. To an extent, the fidgeting had been contained when his father enrolled him in drum lessons. What his father hadn’t anticipated, though, was that Zagreus had found ways to go beyond just those lessons. At school, he tried to join as many music-related activities as possible all while being forced into an A-level studies path on subjects he wasn’t interested in. The teachers networked him to other instructors in the area, and as a result, and without his father’s knowledge or money, Zagreus had taken up dancing and singing lessons in exchange for working at the studios. His school teachers had obligingly marked him as present in the event his father questioned his attendance, even though he had started skipping classes. They would have called Zagreus out had his grades dropped, but they never had the need.
It had been one of his outside instructors who submitted the application on his behalf to this university. They had bonded over the many hours Zagreus had spent in the studio, and the instructor had taken pity on him and his situation. The actual acceptance process had been deliriously quick. Zagreus felt as though one day he blinked and there was an envelope in his hands not only granting him admission but an extremely rare full scholarship. Something that allowed him to operate completely independently of his father for the very first time.
And when he was on stage like this, it made the countless fights with his father and stress over his classmates and coursework all worth it. Zagreus loved nothing more.
Their number ended, and the 4th year clapped Zagreus on the back as they took their bows, obviously pleased with how everything had gone. Zagreus scanned the crowd, eyes falling on a very tall figure hovering near the door. When he was sure the man was looking back at him, Zagreus offered a small wave. His heart soared with the thumbs up and wave he got in return.
Walking off stage, though, it hit him that he had completely neglected to not only ask the man’s name, but offer his own, as well.
***
Much to Thalia’s chagrin, his performance had been one of the most popular of the night. Knowing that, there was no way she could possibly convince the other fraternity members to reject him. Unfortunately, that meant that more first years were going to give him the cold shoulder as word spread.
Two days after his performance, Zagreus was hiding out in his single dorm room, doing nothing in particular. His anxiety about his upcoming classes was at the forefront of his mind, distracting him from all else.
As he was going over possible interactions with classmates for the umpteenth time, his phone buzzed on his desk. Zagreus snatched it up, eager for something new to focus on. He didn’t recognize the number, but the message made his breath stutter to a stop.
I take it you'd like the hat back, then?
Zagreus hadn’t expected the guy to actually text him. He had already begun to chalk up the beanie as a total loss. Hands shaking, he typed out what he hoped sounded like a neutral, if not friendly, response.
Absolutely! I see you finally found my note.
A message came back almost immediately. Zagreus’ heart felt like it was about to jump out of his chest and run laps around the building.
What should I call someone who sneaks hats into stranger's bags and then writes on their property?
Zagreus. And what do I call someone who prefers hiding all alone at parties?
Thanatos.
And now Zagreus had a name to put to those haunting amber eyes. He felt as though he was teetering on the precipice of something life-changing. Settling back on his bed, he began to text, finding himself wishing he was back with Thanatos on that window seat.