Chapter Text
They always say things get worse before they get better. Well, things got a lot worse, that’s for sure. Hero can hardly wrap his mind around everything that’s happened in the last 24 hours. First had been waking up to find the bloody aftermath of Sunny and Basil’s fight. Seeing Sunny lying there, face covered in blood with his eye gouged out, Hero could only think of Mari. How mad she would have been, how scared, that Sunny might have died there without any of them knowing until morning.
Then just moments ago, Sunny had come into Basil’s hospital room, all five of them finally gathered together once more. And he told them the truth. It was hard to imagine, let alone put himself in their shoes. What were they thinking? Were they even thinking, or was it all autopilot by that point? Hero couldn’t know and part of him was scared to ask.
Of course, he was angry, as was Aubrey. She was this close to pouncing on Sunny when a nurse stormed into the room and hauled him off, berating him for leaving his bed with his wounds. Now, they all stood silently around Basil’s bed, who had woken up at some point during Sunny’s confession.
“I’m sorry we never told you.” Basil was the first to break the silence, voice small and scratchy, and Aubrey rounded on him immediately. He flinched but kept talking regardless. “You don’t have to forgive us, but please don’t be mad at Sunny. It’s all my fault. If I had never suggested… if I hadn’t…”
Silence fell over the room once more. Aubrey almost audibly fumed, but she kept her arms rigidly at her side. Kel hovered nervously beside her, ready to hold her back the moment she let loose. Eventually, she somehow calmed down enough to speak.
“You’re damn right we’re mad. How could you?! Mari deserved better than that! Than this!” She threw her hands in the air, gesturing wildly to her sides. Her voice shook, both with anger and betrayal. Hero felt the same. He knew Kel did too, even as he tried to placate and calm everyone. “I thought we were friends! Best friends! Don’t we deserve to know? Aren’t friends supposed to be there for each other? How can we help if don’t even know to begin with?!”
At that, Basil inhaled sharply, turning to stare at his hands where they clenched his sheets. Aubrey was crying now, frowning so severely it must have hurt as she tried desperately to keep from outright sobbing. Kel quietly pat her on the shoulder, rubbing her arm tenderly as his own eyes watered.
“She’s right, Basil.” Hero figured now was the best time to speak up, being the only one who could possibly do so without hiccupping through tears. “We’re obviously angry that you guys kept this from us, but it’s not just for doing… that. We want to be there for you two because we care about you. When you keep something so important a secret, well… it makes that kinda hard.”
Basil nods, faced turned down so only the drop of his tears on his hands can be seen. Aubrey hiccups then before finally letting the dam burst as she sobs uncontrollably into Kel’s waiting arms. Hero has to take a deep breath so as to not be pulled into the waterworks himself.
“It’s gonna be alright now, Aubrey. Everything’s gonna be okay, got it?” Kel soothed Aubrey as best he could, rubbing small circles into her back as he led her to a chair. She only sobbed louder in response.
“I’m… really sorry, Hero. I am.” Basil’s small voice brought Hero’s attention away from the scene across the room. “I only wanted to protect Sunny, but I… I guess I didn’t do a great job of that, huh?”
“Basil, I can’t say I understand what you were thinking back then. Honestly, it’s a little horrifying that you thought about that in the first place? And I know things will never go back to the way they used to be, but I’m glad you guys told us. Really, I am.” He gives Basil a sad smile and ruffles his hair. Basil sniffles and nods reluctantly. Hero wonders if, rather than them forgiving him, Basil will ever forgive himself.
Shaking his head, Hero gives one last glance over to where Kel is still calming Aubrey down before leaving the room. He had initially decided to get some fresh air, but his traitorous legs instead decided to take him all the way up to Sunny’s room. There he stood now, hesitating to knock as nurses pass behind him, oblivious to his inner turmoil.
He still wasn’t sure how to feel about the whole situation. Things had escalated so quickly and never calmed down, so his emotions were a mess, and he couldn’t make heads or tails of them. Most of him was still mad, obviously, but just as much of him was horrified. To think that Sunny and Basil had kept such a massive secret to themselves for this long, well, their current states said a lot about how that went for them.
Surprisingly, a part of him was relieved, too. He hadn’t quite understood that particular thought until he found himself standing across from Sunny, having finally entered his room after realizing how lame he looked hesitating at the door. Seeing the young boy under the bleak lighting, his skin so pale he nearly blends into his sheets, Hero understood now why he felt relief.
For four years, he had believed he was to blame for Mari’s death. He was the closest to her, aside from her dear baby brother, so he should’ve seen the signs. He should have looked closer, tried harder, but he failed. And he paid for that with her death. That was what he believed up until today.
But now, none of that was true. All of his worries and fears had been washed away like footprints in the sand with Sunny’s confession. No, now he was just like the others, unaware of Sunny and Basil’s torment as it ripped them apart inside. Hero’s weak attempt at self-isolation for that first year had been successfully carried out by Sunny for the past four years. All that time, alone and haunted by his memories, Hero can only wonder how his mind has held up for this long.
“Hey there, Sunny.” Hero waves lamely, unsure of how to proceed because he definitely hadn’t planned to come in here. Sunny nods in his direction, not exactly looking up to greet him but not ignoring his presence. Hero figured that was as good an invitation as any to go stand at Sunny’s side. This close, he could more plainly see how far Sunny’s health had fallen.
His bones poked through his skin at multiple points, almost threatening to break through at any moment. Hero could clearly see where bruises were beginning to form where the bandages weren’t tightly wrapped. Looking up to his face, Hero’s stomach churned at the bandage over his eye, thickly wrapped to protect it from further harm.
Sunny, for his part, is silent. He doesn’t flinch or fidget under Hero’s gaze, instead staring blankly down at his hands where they rest on his lap. Hero realizes, a bit belatedly, that he’s been unabashedly staring at Sunny for a while now and clears his throat.
“Sorry, it’s just… it’s hard seeing you like this, Sunny.” It is. Hero can’t get over just how sickly Sunny looks, especially as his hospital gown nearly drowns him in its fabric. “I know there’s probably a lot for us to talk about, but, um, well…”
He’s floundering. His tongue is tying itself into knots, words refusing to form properly as he searches for what he’s trying to say. Sunny turns his head slightly, still not looking at Hero.
“It’s okay, Hero. You don’t have to force yourself.” His voice is small. It would have been lost if not for how quiet the room is. “You should be angry with me, after everything we did I can’t blame you. I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness.”
Hero frowns at that. He wasn’t here to yell at Sunny, even despite his anger at the two boys. There’s a time and place for these things and that place is not while Sunny is recovering in the hospital. But before he can even open his mouth, a nurse enters the room.
“Oh, hello! You must be one of Sunny’s friends?” She tilts her head innocently, oblivious to the tension in the room. “It’s good to see some visitors in here. We tried getting his mother, but she seemed rather busy, unfortunately.”
Hero felt a pang in his chest, though he’s not sure of what. He can understand being busy at work, but surely not so much she can’t come see Sunny for even a moment. He lost an eye! Hero shakes his head. It’s not his place to judge Sunny’s mother and Sunny himself doesn’t seem bothered by the nurse’s words. Moving on swiftly, the nurse continues.
“Well, I hope you can do something for the poor boy, young man.” Hero’s head snaps to look at the nurse, attention fully on her now. “You can probably tell just by looking, but he’s suffered severe malnourishment for a while now. Hasn’t even seen the sun in years, either. I do hope you can help him on his road to recovery.”
Her smile is soft, as if she hadn’t just spoken so plainly about something to gut-wrenching. Hero’s returning smile is tight, and he nods firmly. She fiddles with a few more things before taking her leave, a much tenser silence following in her wake.
“Hero-“
“Don’t.” Hero’s voice is clipped, but he tries to keep his anger from bleeding over too much. “Just… don’t.”
Sunny nods, drawing into himself again. Hero’s legs finally give, and he slumps onto the bed, head buried in his hands. He’s such a failure. Not only had he done nothing for the others, but he also hadn’t been there for Sunny in his time of need. He had promised Mari to look after her brother but look where he is now.
“Sunny.” He has to say something, anything to break this awful silence. Sunny barely shows that he’s listening from where he’s curled in on himself. “Look, I’m not mad at you, okay? I mean, I am, but not… Ugh!”
Hero groans loudly and flops backwards, crushing the palms of his hands into his face. Sunny remains silent.
“Do you really think I’d be mad about this? At you? I mean, I’m the one who failed here. I should have been there for you. Instead, I just pushed everyone away like an idiot.” Hero huffs out a laugh, his voice choked. Sunny shakes his head, reaching for Hero hesitantly.
“It’s not your fault, Hero. You didn’t know. I didn’t tell anyone. Besides, it’s what I deserved.” Hero sits up quickly, snapping to look at Sunny. Sunny flinches, reeling back a little.
“Really? You think a twelve-year-old deserves to starve himself? Sure, none of us knew the truth about Mari’s death, but the truth is you still lost your sister. How could I ever think that you deserve that?” Sunny lowers his head, fists clenching his sheets as he began to tremble.
“I didn’t want to be selfish.” His voice is watery, tears threatening to burst if he says too much. Hero’s heart clenches and he forces himself to take a deep breath to steady himself.
“Sunny, look at me. Please.” Hero’s voice is pleading as he turns his body to fully face the young boy. It takes a bit before Sunny complies and slowly raises his head. “You can’t keep punishing yourself like this. What if Kel hadn’t gotten to you? What if you had moved away without any of us ever talking again? Would you still keep up that routine? You could’ve… that could’ve killed you, Sunny.”
Sunny sniffles, desperate to keep from crying. He clears his throat a few times before he can speak clearly.
“I didn’t care.” That’s all it takes for the dam to burst. Sunny curls in on himself as he sobs, hand over his mouth to muffle the sound. Hero can’t take it anymore. He grabs Sunny and pulls him in for a hug. Sunny tenses at first before relaxing into Hero’s arms, grasping at his shirt as he buries his face into Hero’s shoulder. Hero cries too, silent tears rolling down his cheeks as he cradles Sunny in his arms.
They stay like that for a while, long after they’ve both calmed down. Hero is petting Sunny’s head, running his fingers through his hair. Sunny’s breath is still stuttering, but he’s calm enough to speak again.
“I’m sorry.” He hurries on before Hero can chastise him for apologizing again. “Not just for keeping everything a secret. I’m sorry… for not caring about myself. I thought it was selfish to ask anyone for help. I mean, you were all dealing with your own stuff, and… I just didn’t want to be a burden anymore.”
Hero nods, understanding at least a little more now where Sunny was coming from. He hugs Sunny just a little tighter, though.
“It’s okay now. Everything’s gonna be okay. You told the truth and that’s what matters. We can help you now, okay? I promise, I’ll be there for you now. I won’t leave you alone again.” Hero’s voice is thick with emotion again, his tears threatening to come back in full force. Sunny can only nod, hands still tightly clenched on Hero’s shirt. Hero can feel the wetness now on his shoulder from Sunny’s tears, but he doesn’t care. Not so long as it means Sunny’s here now, so long as he’s back with them.
Hero clears his throat, forcing the tears back down so he can speak properly. He leans back a little, forcing Sunny to look him in the face.
“Sunny, I need you to promise me something, okay? I need you to take care of yourself once you move. I mean, I can only do so much over the phone.” Hero laughs lightly and Sunny lets a small smile slip. “I don’t… not to be mean, but I don’t think your mom has been doing a very good job about taking care of you. So, I need you to do the best you can, okay?”
Sunny nods, not arguing with Hero’s statement. He takes a deep breath and drops his hands from Hero’s shirt, bracing himself on his legs.
“Hero, can I tell you something?” His voice is stronger now, but there’s a hesitance there that makes Hero worry. Sunny, seeing this, continues, “It’s not about Mari. Well, it kinda is, but not about… her death. It’s about me. What I’ve been doing, I guess.”
Hero nods slowly, trying to untie that statement in his head. What he’s been doing… so, he wants to talk about his time in isolation? Hero furrows his brow.
“Okay, but don’t force yourself, Sunny. I’m not gonna judge you either way. If this hurts to talk about-“ Sunny shakes his head fervently.
“No, I need to say it. If I don’t tell anyone now, I don’t think I could ever talk about it again. It’s really hard to explain, but I want someone to… to know other than me.” Sunny locks eyes with Hero now, silently pleading for him to listen. Hero nods firmly, attention fully on Sunny.
So, Sunny tells him. He tells Hero all about Headspace, about their adventures, Omori, and how all of it was to repress his memories. Sunny stumbles here and there, red dusting his cheeks as shame creeps onto his face when he mentions Mari’s presence. Ah, so that explains how he stayed in that dream world for so long. How he was able to stay cooped up for four years without end.
Hero had heard in his classes about trauma victims repressing their memories of the event to save themselves from pain, but creating an entire world for that express purpose? Sunny’s imagination is next level, Hero thinks. If he was telling the truth, though, it made everything click into place perfectly. His distant stare that night in the piano room, his restrained reactions when they hung out, all of it made sense now.
Sunny had immersed himself so entirely in this dream world that he’d divorced himself from reality. It was probably pure chance that he answered the door three days ago. If Kel had gone at any other time, Hero knows Sunny might never have left that perfect world where his friends still loved and cherished him. Where his sister was still alive.
“Wow, Sunny.” Hero is the first to break the silence. Sunny nods, his face still red from talking until his breath ran out. “That’s… yeah, that’s a lot.”
“It’s awful.” Sunny’s trembling again. Hero reaches for him, but Sunny turns away. “I spent all that time forgetting. I made everyone suffer while I ran away.”
“Sunny…” Hero places a hand on his shoulder, shaking him lightly. “I told you, stop beating yourself up. You were a kid. You were just doing what you thought was right. Yeah, it didn’t lead to the greatest of places, but what matters is that you’re here now, okay?”
Sunny puffs out his cheeks, resistant to Hero’s placating. Hero sighs, shoulders sagging. He’s not sure how to help Sunny understand, but he wants to at least try. Too many promises to keep, after all.
“Look, Sunny, I think I get it. I mean, that place sounds pretty incredible. Besides… Mari was there, right?” Sunny squeezes his eyes shut, but Hero forges on. “I can’t blame you for wanting to stay there. Hell, I’d probably do the same thing if I were in your shoes. It took a lot of courage to come out, though, and I’m proud of you for that. I know Mari would be too.”
At that, Sunny releases the tension in his body, tears at the corners of his eyes again. He looks up at Hero, searching for the lies, the anger, but Hero can’t give him that. He means what he says, and he’s only glad that Sunny is here. He doesn’t want to imagine what the world would be like if he lost Sunny, too.
Hero pulls him back in for a hug, where Sunny’s tears stream silently into Hero’s shirt again. Hero figures he’ll have to change his shirt when he gets back home, but he can deal with it for now. He rubs soothing circles into Sunny’s back, shushing him lightly as Sunny sobs loudly.
“Everything is gonna be okay. You’re gonna be okay, Sunny.” Sunny nods, clinging to Hero’s words. Hero hopes he’s not lying, that things will get better from here on. The future is unsure for all of them right now, but he wants to believe that everything will be alright. In this moment, as he hugs Sunny to his heart, Hero holds that hope close and believes with all his being that it will come true.
-----
Hero stretches as he steps out of his car, letting out a loud groan. The aches and pains of driving for so long slowly dissipate as he walks to the front door. Before he can even knock, however, the door is suddenly thrown open and a body slams into him. Nearly toppling him over is none other than Kel, a wide grin stretched across his face. Hero laughs, ruffling Kel’s hair. He only lets go when he hears someone clear their throat.
Looking up, Hero sees Aubrey standing in the doorway, a smirk on her face. Kel races into the house with a squawk as he tries to fix his hair.
“Well, it’s good to see nothing’s changed around here.” Hero speaks to Aubrey, who only rolls her eyes in response. She bounces off the doorway and makes room for him to come inside. Once in, Hero is immediately bombarded by his parents, who attempt to drown him in their affection.
He isn’t entirely surprised when Kel races downstairs, Basil and Sunny in tow. He sort of expected the group to all get back together again to hang out while he’s back in town. So when Basil gives him a timid hello, Hero beams down at him and ruffles his hair.
It had been a few years since Sunny’s confession in the hospital. It had taken Aubrey the longest to let go of her anger, although her friend Kim mostly helped with that. A short while after that, sometime while Hero was away, she had officially made up with Basil and now the two were almost attached at the hip. It had honestly been most surprising to be greeted by Aubrey without him hovering around behind her.
Kel was the first to go back to normal. He had the same thought as Hero in that moment of Sunny’s confession. Both of them had thought back to their argument in that first year. If it had escalated even a little further, then… That thought was what helped Kel keep the group together still. Without him, Hero wonders if any of them would be able to stand each other.
The other three make their way into the kitchen to help Kel and Hero’s mother make lunch, leaving Hero alone in the living room with Sunny. Sunny fidgets nervously, fingers playing with the hem of his vest. Hero wants to greet him like always, but he can’t seem the find the words. Instead, he can only stare, because Sunny seems to have made good on his promise to everyone.
His skin, while still a little pale, has some color to it now. He had even gained something of a tan over the past few years. He was no longer thin as a stick, either. Hero couldn’t obviously see his bone structure and he looked so much healthier now than he had before. Of course, he was still missing an eye, but otherwise he was the picture of health, at least for Sunny’s standards.
“Hi, Hero.” Sunny’s voice, light and airy, brought Hero back to the present. He realizes he had been staring at Sunny in total silence. He has a bad habit of doing that, apparently. Sunny gives him a small wave, light dancing in his eyes.
“Oh, uh, hey! Sorry, you just… you’re looking a lot better, Sunny. I’m glad.” Hero smiles warmly, patting Sunny’s head. Sunny blushes lightly and bats Hero’s hand away. Hero chuckles and instead slings an arm around Sunny’s shoulders, earning him a squeak from the small boy. Even with his health getting better, there was nothing Sunny could do about the height he lost. He would always pout over that unfortunate fact.
“Well, now that the gang’s all back together, let’s celebrate!” Hero jostles Sunny a little. Sunny huffs a small laugh and looks up to meet Hero’s eyes. The warmth and life in his face is enough to make Hero’s heart swell with pride and happiness. He couldn’t be happier, in fact.
“Hey, you two! Lunch is ready! Come get it before Kel eats everything!” Aubrey’s voice rings out from the kitchen, followed by indignant noises from Kel. Hero laughs and lets go of Sunny, moving to leave. Sunny, however, grabs Hero’s arm and holds him back. Hero looks back at him curiously, wondering what’s on his mind.
“Oh! Uh, sorry, I didn’t-“ Sunny lets go, apparently having reached for Hero without realizing. Hero smiles warmly and loops his arm around Sunny’s.
“Don’t worry about it, Sunny. Let’s go eat, hm?” Sunny nods, leaning into Hero as they make their way to the kitchen. The noise and excitement of the day was only beginning, and they would need some fuel for the day’s activities, after all. Hero felt Sunny squeeze his arm before they parted, and he couldn’t help the smile that stuck on his face for the rest of the day.