Chapter Text
“I love you there's no need to cry”
2 weeks
It was an accident to find it. Techno forgot about it honestly, the pain he felt on his back. He was a little busy mourning and throwing himself into anything and everything to distract himself, mostly taking care of the two kids that don’t completely understand what happened to their Dad.
He was getting dressed after a shower, something shiny in the mirror catching his eye. He turns and sees nothing out of the ordinary. His room looks fine, he looks tired and shirtless. Nothing different, he turns again, and there it is, something shiny in the mirror.
He whips around to try and catch it but there's still nothing. He glances around his room, trying to find maybe something catching the light, maybe Fin is hiding in his room again and he just didn’t see her. Still finding nothing he looks back to the mirror. Maybe it’s on him? He turns his body a bit, keeping his eyes on the mirror as he does.
He was right. It’s on him. He turns as much as he can to have his back facing the mirror but still be able to see. On his back is patterns of swirls and shapes and curves that apart would look like a mess but together look beautiful. It’s mostly colored in gold but there are a few spots of green.
Techno quickly realizes that together it all creates a totem of undying in the form of a beautiful tattoo. Its golden color and green eyes and the shape it’s in it can’t be anything but that-
Phil’s head snaps up when he hears a loud thud from upstairs. He quickly sets down the plate he was washing to speed walk his way to Techno’s room. He throws the door open to see his friend on his knees, sobbing with his hands in his hair and a lack of a shirt. He doesn’t question what happened and instead just rushes to Techno, pulling his hands out of his hair as not to damage it.
A glance at the mirror solves Phil’s questions as he sees the new markings on his back.
“I love you there's no need to cry”
1 month
Techno ran a hand through Foosh’s hair, the small child laying on his chest while Techno read a book. It was one of the calmer nights since the incident (Techno refuses to call his husband dying anything else), Phil had left him and the kids alone and the others followed his example. Of course, he enjoyed the company, honestly being alone would probably make everything worse, but it was still nice to get some time away from them.
Fin was somewhere in the kitchen. She said she'd join the two in cuddling in a bit, so Techno let her be. She was responsible enough to be in the kitchen on her own and he’s pretty sure Foosh won’t let him get up right now. He seemed comfortable, sitting right on the line between being awake and asleep. He continues to play with his hair.
Eventually, Fin does leave the kitchen and walk over. But instead of crawling across her brother to get to her spot she simply tugs on his sleeve. Techno looks up from his book and looks to his daughter, standing there holding a bag of bread.
She holds it out to him and he raises a brow in question. She only huffs and shakes the bag a bit, pointing to the kitchen. He follows her finger and it clicks for him “You want me to make you a sandwich?” he asks, and she nods.
Fin doesn’t like talking. She prefers to keep silent, and she’s still learning Sign language. So for a while, it’s a constant game of charades. Techno’s gotten pretty good at it though, as has her brother and Phil, so it’s not too much of a problem.
Techno sets a bookmark on his page and closes the book, setting it on the coffee table. He slowly sits up and moves Foosh off of him. The moment he does Foosh pushes himself into the land of the living and clings on to Techno. He chuckles but doesn’t push him off “Foosh, can you let go? Your sister wants a sandwich”
“No.”
“Please?”
“Mmm.” Foosh lets go of him, but before Techno can get up Foosh pushes himself behind Techno and clings onto his back. Techno gives a fond sigh before saying “Arms around my neck, legs around my middle.”
Foosh quietly cheers immediately and does as told, Techno grabbing his legs so he doesn’t fall and standing up. He shifts Foosh so he can properly hold him then makes his way to the kitchen, Foosh happy to be carried and Fin following along happy to be getting her sandwich.
When Techno gets in the kitchen he lets go of Foosh’s legs and instead holds them to his sides using his arms. He needs his hands free to make food. He holds his hand out to Fin and she hands over the bread. He sets it on the counter then grabs some meat. He starts making a sandwich but pauses when he feels a gentle tug on his braid.
It was feather-light, enough tug to get his attention but not enough to cause any pain. He turns his head a bit with a hum, telling his son that he has Techno’s attention. Foosh kicks his legs a bit and Techno moves his arms, no longer holding the child’s legs in place. Foosh takes the freedom and climbs up Techno, settling himself on his shoulders. Techno goes back to sandwich making
Foosh leans forward and uses Techno’s head as a pillow “Papa?”
“Yes, dear?”
“When’s Daddy coming home?”
Techno freezes, not expecting the question again. It’s not the first time they’ve asked it, and he always gives the same answer, the truth. They’re old enough, he’s not gonna lie to them.
He’s not coming home. Why. because he’s gone. Why. because he saved papa. Why. Techno wants to know that too.
“He’s not, baby. Daddy’s not coming home, you just have papa and grandma Puffy now.”
“Okay.” The amount of sad acceptance in that single word makes his heart shatter not for the first time that month. Techno finishes off the sandwich then sets it on a plate, handing it to Fin. she takes it to the table and Techno goes back to the couch, letting Foosh climb off of him so they can get back into the previous position of them laying down together.
The air is heavy, but it lessens as the night goes on, Fin eventually finishing her food and joining the boys in their cuddle pile. Techno reads more of his book and the kids fall asleep.
They’ll be okay.
"My dear save your tears
For far better years"
2 months
Techno was not one to cry. He never cried, no one would be able to connect the word ‘cry’ to ‘Technoblade’, the blood god, winner of the potato war.
That was before his husband died. Techno can’t even count the amount of time he’s spent crying now, and he hates it. He hates how weak he’s become. He spends at least a quarter of his days crying now, not that he’ll ever admit that. It probably doesn’t even matter
He’s sure Phil can hear him anyway, the inner walls aren’t the thickest and they’re both insomniacs.
He’s trying not to, he swears. It’s not like he enjoys crying, he hates it actually, despises it, he just...can’t stop. He’s sad. He’s sad and he doesn’t know how to deal with that. Anger? Yes. happiness? Also yes. Disappointment? Definitely. But sadness? That’s new and he doesn’t want it, please take the emotion away.
He doesn’t know how to deal with the seemingly never-ending sadness settling in his chest so his brain has decided ah, yes, cry for an hour or two every day, that’ll fix your issues. To be fair, he does feel a bit better after.
But then he goes right back to being sad.
He hates it, he hates This, why did Foolish have to go off and Fucking die, how is Techno supposed to be able to take care of his kids if he can’t even stop himself from crying god damn it, he’s weak-
His vision blurs up for definitely not the first time that day and he stops what he’s doing, standing up straight and pulling his face to the sky, as if looking up will simply just bring the tears back into his body. To be fair, it kinda works, and he slowly gets his vision back, blinking to speed it up.
When he thinks he’s in the clear he looks back down at the several dogs sitting at his feet, waiting for him to give them the food in his hands.
Right, he’s out feeding the hound army. Not a good time or place to do his daily sobbing. He throws a piece of steak to Jessica and Jessica Jr, completely ignoring the fact that those were the hounds Foolish named.
He will not cry. He will not cry today. He will be the strong blood god he’s always been, even if it hurts.
"I love you and also goodbye"
4 months
‘“And that’s exactly why she didn’t” Dad picked up the empty pizza box and headed towards the kitchen. “Let’s get cleaned up. We’ve had a big day, and I for one would like to go to bed early.”
“Did they catch the killer?” Mom asked Arthur. He shook his head. “Grandma thinks he’s still in town. Most likely he’ll strike again. You know, like those serial killers you hear about.”
Just then the shrill sound of a police whistle shattered the evening. Mom gasped in alarm, and I choked on a mouthful of cake.’
Techno turned the page in the book he was reading, his eyes focusing on the opening line of the new page
‘’Don’t worry,” Arthur said. “That’s Grandma calling me. Gotta go.”’
“What woman calls a child home with a whistle?” Techno asks to the cold, empty air “I mean- it clearly works, but why?” he shakes his head a bit and continues reading the page.
It’s a thing he’s started doing. After they made Foolish a grave (They didn’t have a body, but they didn’t need one. It’s not here for that ‘here lies’ bullshit. His husband is getting a grave.) Techno’s taken up leaning against it and reading whatever book’s taken up his interest at the moment. If he has time that is. Sometimes the kids join him, sometimes Puffy joins him.
He’ll read and speak his thoughts aloud like there’s someone there with him. He knows there’s not, but it stops him from crying so he’ll take it.
“I think you’d like this book. It’s a murder mystery, you always seemed to favor those over the romance novels we’d steal from Phil in our younger years.” He speaks in a one-sided conversation he happily carries. “This isn’t the first time I’ve read this book, but it’s been long enough that I don’t remember the ending. I think it was a happy one-”
He stops speaking when he hears a faint sound of footsteps. He turns his head to look over the grave into the forest around it and sees white and gold. He turns back to his original position and when the footsteps get closer he says “Hello puffy. Hi Foosh.”
“Hi Papa” Foosh runs around the grave and drops himself into Techno’s lap, Techno moving the book last second so it doesn’t get squished. He smiles a bit and gives Foosh a gentle headbutt “Hey kid. Where’s your sister?”
“Napping on the couch. Uncle Phil’s watching her, don’t worry” Foosh knows him so well. Techno’s smile widens as Foosh takes his book and settles in his lap with his back meeting Techno’s chest
“Whatcha readin’?”
“Closed for the season. It’s a murder mystery.”
“Cool!” Foosh looks up at him “Can you read it to me?”
Techno chuckles and takes the book back, flipping back to the page he was on “Of course. Want me to start over or do you wanna play detective and figure it out yourself?”
“I wanna play detective!” Foosh cheers and Techno simply nods, ignoring the feeling of puffy sitting down by him. She always did when she came, she’d read over his shoulder and he’d let her. she never really said anything unless one of the kids asked a question. He was fine with that, sometimes they just sit in silence and he’s fine with that. Sometimes just being with another person is nice.
Techno starts to read aloud to both his son and the mother of his husband and the sadness, while buried deep, lightens just a little. Enough to be forgotten for just a moment longer.
“And in the mornin’ you’ll be alone”
1 and a half months
Techno was cold. It’s the first thing he notices when semi-consciousness greets him and he doesn’t bother opening his eyes, instead rolling over and patting at the bed. looking for the heat source that normally laid right next to him.
His hand meets cold sheets, and his half-awake brain doesn’t understand why as he keeps patting around. Up, down, closer, further, nothing. Just cold sheets untouched by the warmth of another.
Techno cracks open his eyes and grunts in disappointment when he does find the rest of the bed empty. That’s not right. There’s supposed to be something else here. Someone else. He slowly sits up and looks around his room, his brain slowly catching up.
There’s no one else here. That’s a fact. He feels like someone else should be there. Also a fact. So then why-
Techno’s hand goes back to the empty spot on the bed and he remembers. His mind finally catches up and he remembers it’s been that way for months now. He remembers the only warmth in the bed is his own and his kids when they have nightmares and come to him crying. He remembers many things he doesn’t want to.
Techno pulls another blanket out from under the bed and wraps it around himself, laying back down. He doesn’t wanna remember, he doesn’t wanna feel sad, and so he goes back to bed, back into the lands of his mind where he is nothing, where he simply floats until a nightmare takes him from his forgiving emptiness
Oh, how he wishes he could hibernate right now.
“And I’ll be off somewhere far from my home.”
3 and a half months
Techno started taking walks. Phil isn’t letting him stay in the house and sulk anymore and going outside for chores apparently isn’t enough either. So he’s started taking at least 2 30 minute walks a day, by the law of Phil. he mostly spaces out when he takes them if he’s being honest. He knows the area so well he just automatically walks in a large circle.
So he spaces out. Tuning in to the voices and their chatter. Lately, they’re been a bit nicer. When they’re not yelling he honestly finds them comforting. So when he goes on his forced walks he takes himself out of the reality he’s avoiding and listens to the people in his head until he makes it home. They’re entertaining.
Be my mirror my sword and shielddddd
My missionaries in a foreign field!
For some reason, I can’t explainnnnn
Song lyrics pog?
Now that interstate isd paved with memoriess
Not a good song bestie-
Oh shoot
Sorry Techno :(
I am creation both haunted and holyyyy
Made in glory!!!!
Such a good song
Reminds me of Phil lol
Omg yes!
E
Well well look who’s inside again
Not that one
Not here
Not now.
Okay
TOSS YOUR DIRTY SHOES IN MY WASHING MACHINE HEART
YES
BEST SONG
Love Mitski
I bet on losing dogs~
AH
NOOOOOO
E
Hi Techno, love ya big guy :3 <3
Technosupport
Technosupport
Technosupport
Technosupport
Yes Technosupport
Lomve himb
Technosupport
So yeah, that’s what he spends 30 minutes listening to. Either a spam of support, memes, or song lyrics. Sometimes book recommendations.
Finish closed for the season, I wanna know if the girl got over her fear or not!
Yes
Do that when you can plz
Yes
E
No time for sad when so
Swag
Swag
Swag!
Hey pooh, how are you?
They took my fucking eye.
Lmao
And they were roommates
HJDBKGV NO
JAIL
Don’t forget to feed steve
Steve!
Stev stev steve
Steve my beloved
My boyfriend cheated on me :(
Your boyfriend’s a bitch
He ain’t shit
He can suck on my-
Do not finish that sentence
Have y’all seen Candice?
Who’s Candice?
:)
You did not just fall for that
:))
No,,,
>:))
It's kind of nice. To just tune the world out for a while. And when 30 minutes pass without him even realizing it he goes back inside the house and sits with Steve, who is doing a very good job at being an emotional support polar bear.
Sometimes, however, he gets joined on his walks. At those times the walks feel longer since he’s not just mindlessly walking around while listening to chat. It’s mostly Niki or puffy. Niki keeps him out of his head and if it were anyone else he’d be more annoyed at it.
But it’s Niki, so he’s only a little annoyed.
When puffy joins him it’s silent for a bit, until he breaks the silence. It’s always him, and always the same sentence
“I’m sorry.”
He never says for what, they both just know. And she always tells him
“It’s not your fault.”
And it’s technically not. technically it’s not his fault any of that happened. technically it’s not his fault that they fell. technically it’s not his fault Foolish decided to grab his hand, had he known what he was doing he would have let himself hit the ground empty-handed.
technically it’s not his fault. But he feels like it is. He feels like it’s his fault Puffy’s son is gone, so he apologizes even if Puffy won’t accept it.
He goes home and lays with steve.
“I love you, this isn’t goodbye.”
5 months
Phil was a bit suspicious when he found all the totems and techno gone and the basement locked. He asked Ranboo about it and the younger had said that Techno had asked him for some totems. He had given him about 6 and hasn’t seen techno since. Niki and puffy give the same answers, but they only gave him 1.
Phil has a possible idea for what Techno’s doing, but really he could be doing anything, especially with over 10 totems. Phil decides to leave him be for now and keep the kids out of the basement.
Techno resurfaces two days later and doesn’t say a word to Phil, going straight for Ranboo’s house. He let him, but curiosity killed the cat and it kills birds too, so he watched from the window. He sees Techno give something too small to be a totem to Ranboo and the ender hybrid seems quite excited about the gift. He goes back into his house and Techno walks back to his own.
When Techno comes back inside Phil looks at him “What did you give to Ranboo?” he asks, deciding beating around the bush will get him nowhere.
“You’ll see” is the answer he gets and then Techno goes back to the basement.
Phil is a patient man, but once again burning curiosity nags at him and he throws a jacket on before making his way to Ranboo’s little hut. He knocks on the door and Ranboo answers immediately, a new set of green earrings shining on his ears as well as a ring set on his middle finger.
“Phil, uh- Hi.” Ranboo awkwardly says, giving him a look like he just caught the kid with his hand in the cookie jar.
“Ranboo, hi. New jewelry?” he asks and Ranboo perks up immediately.
“Yeah! Techno gave it to me actually. He gave me a bunch, I was just trying some on. Seeing what I could wear comfortably, ya know?’ he says and Phil nods, still eyeing the jewelry. The green and gold in it were colored the same as the totems Techno had gotten the other day and Phil’s suspicions have been proven correct.
He waves Ranboo goodbye and returns home.
Another two days go by before the piglin comes up again, but this time he goes straight to Phil. Phil’s sitting on the couch with a cup of tea and looking at the fire when a certain someone steps into his view and blocks the light. Phil looks up At Techno and Techno holds out a small jewelry case to him. Phil sets his tea down on the side table and carefully takes the case, opening it and seeing a bracelet with green charms. Totem eyes.
Not many people know, but you don’t need the whole totem for it to work. You just need the eyes and a bit of the body. So, by taking it apart and making it beautiful jewelry, it’ll still work if made right. Techno knows how to make them right, Foolish had taught him. He basically just gave Phil a totem he doesn’t need to hold.
He takes the bracelet out of the case and slips it on, it fits perfectly. Not too tight to be uncomfortable but not too loose so it’ll slip off easily either. It’s perfect, just like everything else Techno makes.
He looks up at the piglin and smiles “Thank you, Techno, it’s very pretty.”
Techno simply nods and moves over to the front door, grabbing his cape and leaving.
Later on, he sees Puffy with new gold and green horn jewelry, both cuffs and dangles, and Niki with a golden-colored choker with green dangling charms
Techno is making sure History Never repeats. Not while he’s around.
“You’ll see me again when the wars at an end”
6 months
Techno’s taking a liking to swimming, especially with Foosh and Fin. He can’t do it near his house in the snow, as all the water is frozen or freezing cold. So when he can he travels somewhere warmer and sets up there.
‘There’ is a beach by the ocean a good walking distance away, and an even better tridenting distance. He can only hold one of the kids while using the trident so Phil normally comes with carrying the other. Sometimes it’s not Phil and it’s Niki, as she likes going to the beach with them and playing with the children
The one they found is perfect and seems to be untouched by the other residents of the server, which only makes it better.
The kids were a bit cautious when they had just started going. Not because if they go too far out the water would pull them under, or because if they stayed out too long they’d get burnt, or because of anything like that.
No, it’s because of the sharks.
The sharks.
“PAPA!” both his kids practically screamed. He would have been alarmed if he hadn’t been watching them the entire time, including watching them go from having fun in the water to scrambling to get out when a fin appears above the water.
Once they make it to him they cling onto him, Foosh panicking and telling him about the danger in the water with his sister nodding aggressively in agreement. A smile of amusement crosses his face and he puts a hand on his son’s head to stop him “The sharks? You guys saw sharks?” he asks, and they both nod.
“They won’t hurt you, you know that right?” He asks and Foosh pouts “They’re scary!”
Techno chuckles and stands up, wiping some sand off of him “Then you two stay here while I go talk to the sharks”
“No! They’re gonna eat you!” Foosh cries out
Techno ruffles his son’s hair “No they won’t, just watch.” He says before walking towards the water, the two totem children staying by where Techno was previously sitting. Techno walks into the water, up to his Chest which is further than the two had gone before. He searches the water’s surface for any sign of the large beings and smiles slightly when he spots something swimming towards him
The shark going towards him gets closer and closer, starting to circle him when it gets close enough. Another joins it, and then a few more until he has a shiver of shark’s circling him like he’s their prey
But he’s not, and he knows they know that. He holds a hand out towards one of the sharks and they go against it, letting him give it a gentle pat. Another brushes against his legs and despite being surrounded by dangerous creatures he is not scared, because he knows they won’t bite him.
Being married to a man who had a love for sharks and was part one has its advantages. Techno had been on the receiving end of many shark rants, he could name all the sharks currently circling him with ease, he’d been told the info so many times he has it memorized.
Remembering why he was in the water in the first place he looks back to the shore, Foosh and Fin now standing at the edge of the water watching him. He waves at them and calls “See? They’re nice! Come back in the water, it’s okay!”
They look hesitant, which is fair, but end up walking back into the water anyway, they swim closer until they’re at the edge of the shark circle. They don’t go any further, not wanting to get too close to the sharks. The sharks take care of that themselves, however, because they make the circle bigger, the kids now swimming inside the shark circle without having to move
Their both quick to Swim to Techno, clinging onto him as the circle gets smaller again. Techno smiles and holds onto both of his children “See? They don’t bite. Hold your hand out.” He says and they both do, once again a shark (A smaller one, Techno notes) breaks away and brushes again their hands. The two immediately become star-eyed and Techno can’t help but laugh at how quirky they went from scared to excited.
“Your daddy really liked sharks, ya know” He starts, the mention of their gone dad gaining their attention immediately. “He was part Shark actually, but he also just really liked them. Whenever he went swimming he’d always play with them, and they adored him. He loved you, and they know that. They’ll never hurt you as long as you don’t hurt them” He says and puts a hand out to the side as a shark passes, his fingers brushing against it.
The kids were quite fond of the creatures after that.
“I love you and for now, goodbye.”
1 Year
Techno’s lips close as his quiet singing comes to an end. He’s sitting on the cold steps outside his house as he watched Foosh, Fin, Phil, and Puffy have a snowball fight. Also Niki. he doesn’t know when Niki got there but Niki’s there too, taking easy shots and just generally being a force of chaos in the snow. A nice chill chaos, of course, it’s a snowball fight with old people and children
Ranboo probably would have joined them if the snow wasn’t made of water and he wasn’t an enderman. Techno himself just feels like watching as everyone gets soaked with snow, so he does. He’s been quietly singing to himself while he watches, specifically a different version of the song Foolish taught him. A more hopeful version.
A hand makes its way to his necklace, and it has some more things on it this time. A couple of beads and a shark charm Niki made him. It fits perfectly with the rings that still sit on the necklace and he loves it all.
He’s doing better, and so are the kids. He still gets sad, and he still cries -not that he will admit it- but it happens much less than it did a few months ago and Techno will take it as improvement.
He knows something now that he didn’t before. Something that he didn’t know all those months ago. His husband will be back
One day, Foolish will be back. Maybe with a different name, maybe with a different face, maybe completely the same, but he will be back one day. ‘One day’ could be tomorrow, or next week, or next year, or hundreds of years from now, but he will be back. He’s a demi-god, and according to Phil, Lady Death has been keeping an eye on him until he’s sent back to the overworld.
Techno will be there when he gets back, the kids are immortal like him and will also be around when their dad comes home, just older. And hopefully, not their father’s height, if they become Follish’s height he’ll never hear the end of the short jokes.
But regardless when Foolish eventually comes home, he’ll be waiting with open ar-
Techno’s kicked out of his thoughts by a snowball hitting his face. He hears laughing from Phil, “OOOOOOHHHHH!” from the twins and frantic apologizing from Niki. he wipes it off of his face as best he can then slowly stands. The others go quiet as Techno sheds his cloaking, setting it down on the railing.
Techno scoops up a handful of snow, makes it into a ball, then tosses it at Niki, it hits her in the chest and it stays silent for a moment.
Three seconds later everyone is running after Techno as he runs away, snowballs being thrown at him and most missing their target.
They’ll all be okay. At least for the moment.