Chapter Text
Finals are upon them.
If Alex didn’t know from being Willie’s boyfriend, he would have known from the increased franticness in their college-aged customers. One had become so frazzled the other day they had left without their five coffees they ordered, only to come racing back in five minutes later crying. It’d taken Alex a few minutes to calm them down and assure them that their coffees were still there and they wouldn’t have to pay for them again. He sincerely hoped they were on their way to a study group and that all of the coffees weren’t for them.
But Alex is Willie’s boyfriend, so he’s got insider knowledge. He knows the academic calendar for UCLA better than some of the students that attend the college—he’s avoiding looking at Flynn—and he knows that after this week, students will be home free for fourteen weeks. It also means that Willie put in an availability request change at his home store so his schedule mostly matches Alex, and they’re able to spend the summer together. Actually going on dates (which they haven’t been on yet—no, Willie, the Orpheum doesn’t count) and seeing each other outside of coffee shops and Alex’s house. There’s no way that Alex is going to lie at this point and say he isn’t excited.
But to get there—to their summer together—they have to survive finals. And Alex isn’t entirely sure that Willie will.
He vaguely remembers the look of exhaustion on Willie's face back in December when Alex was trying to win him back as a friend. He definitely remembers the sleep deprived texts he’d get at four am last quarter during finals week when Willie continued to read ‘patience’ as ‘patients’ and couldn’t figure out the meaning of a sentence because of it. He hasn’t gotten any of those yet this quarter, but he’s not going to be surprised if they do happen.
As Willie’s boyfriend this time around, Alex takes it upon himself to make sure Willie is taking care of himself. His years of anxiety have given him a strong skill in planning and schedule making, so he sits down and makes one for Willie based off of what Willie says are his most important or needed subjects. And Willie follows it, and Alex can see the relief in his shoulders at having a schedule to follow, but it’s not enough to solve every issue that finals tend to bring. Because Willie is still stubborn, and anxious, and has ADHD. So even though Alex had blocked out an hour for Willie’s abnormal psych studies—
“It’s definitely been an hour,” Alex says, lifting the laptop out of Willie’s view. Willie’s eyes track it for a moment, clearly trying to continue reading whatever he’s focused on, but eventually his eyes flick to Alex.
“What?”
“It’s been more than an hour,” Alex sighs, “and I haven’t heard your alarm.”
“I set it for two hours,” Willie waves him off, reaching for his laptop. His eyebrows are knitted together, lips pulled down in a slight frown. “It’s finals, I need to focus more—”
“Wills,” Alex says setting his laptop down and rounding the table. “It’s finals, but you don’t need to work yourself into an early grave.” He runs a hand over Willie’s hair and cards his fingers through the locks. He uses his hand in Willie’s hair to tilt his boyfriend’s head back and leans down to press a kiss to his forehead. Against his skin, he murmurs, “An hour, babe. That’s what you get.”
When he pulls back, Willie’s eyes are closed and the creases between his brow are gone. “Hour and a half?” he bargains without opening his eyes.
Alex smiles down at him smugly, though Willie can’t see. “All right, hour and a half,” he agrees.
Willie’s eyes fly open. He immediately narrows them, glaring up at Alex. “That was a trick.”
“That was psychology,” Alex hums.
“Well—”
“Let me have this one,” Alex says. Willie stares up at him and his face relaxes before melting into a smile. Alex strokes his hand through his hair again and smiles. “Thank you.”
Willie hums and leans his head into Alex’s touch, closing his eyes. “I do still have to study some, you know,” Willie says, but he’s not really arguing with Alex, or against Alex’s hand in his hair. He’s just being an asshole.
“It’s break time,” Alex decides, and takes his hand from Willie’s hair. Willie’s face folds into a frown and he shifts in his chair towards Alex. Alex leans forward, saving his work on his laptop, and then closes it with a gentle thud. He marks Willie’s page in his text book before closing that as well, and then he grabs his mug and plate. “C’mon,” he says.
Willie stands up from his chair and follows obediently, waiting at the front counter as Alex disappears to put his dishes in the sink. When Alex comes back, he’s already got his card out to pay for his next drink—fifty percent off with Alex’s employee discount—and Reggie is ringing him out since Flynn is taking the next few days off to prepare for finals. Alex moves to start making the drink while Reggie and Willie stand talking at the counter and he can’t help himself from grinning.
So, maybe they haven’t been on an actual date yet, but things with Willie are going extremely well. They spend their time together when they can—both with and without other friends. And Willie gets along so well with the rest of the band and, now that they’ve forgiven him for hurting Willie, Alex gets along well with Micah and Brandon. They all fit together in a way that’s indescribable. There’s a group chat with all eight of them that Alex swears never stops moving, and they’ve all got plans over the summer—together.
Alex is so used to it just being the band, but it feels so natural adding Willie, and with Willie comes Brandon and Micah, and they don’t feel out of place either. Even Bobby is joining them for some of their plans, though that one is tougher because, while Luke is willing to be civil, it’s clear he’s not himself when Bobby is around. They all know it’s going to take time to build up a semblance of comfort, so they’re taking it slow, which Bobby is more than happy to do. None of them are expecting the two to be the best of friends again—just happy enough around each other that they can spend family time together. Because they are a family, and his family has nearly doubled in the past few months, but he’s wildly grateful for it, and wouldn’t change anything about it.
Alex brings Willie’s drink to the counter and passes it over. “So,” he says, “tell me what you’ve been studying?” It’s an olive branch—letting Willie recall his material, but not drown himself in his books.
Willie’s face lights up and he sets off on a ramble, sounding all too smart to be Alex’s boyfriend. It’s hard to understand him at times, both attributed to the fact that he’s using words that Alex doesn’t know and he’s talking too fast, but as soon as Alex feels himself start to get lost, Willie seems to know and slows down, explaining himself further and simpler. His eyes are bright and warm and the color of coffee and Alex grins, reaches across the counter, and grabs Willie’s hand. Alex loves him.
(*)
Meeting for lunch seemed like the best idea at the time when Alex’s mom had suggested it, but Alex is regretting it now. Alex thinks something like a hike, where they could have ditched his parents at any time, would have been smarter.
“Don’t tell me you’re nervous,” Willie says from the passenger’s seat, “because then I’m going to freak out, and you’ll still be freaking out, and we’ll both be freaking out, and your parents will have us at our weakest, and that will actually be something to freak out about, and they crush us, like tiny bugs, and—”
“You’re freaking me out more,” Alex whines pathetically.
“So you are freaking out?”
“… No?”
“Alex!” Willie huffs. “What happened to ‘they’ll love you, Willie’? Where did that confidence go?”
Alex shakes his head. “They will love you,” he says, positive of that fact. Willie is impossible not to love. Add on to that the fact that Willie is the reason Alex reached out to his parents and reconciled with them, Willie has firmly planted himself on their good side. Them loving Willie isn’t the issue here.
“Then what’s the issue, Decaf?” Willie hums, reaching over and taking one of Alex’s hands in his. He tangles their fingers together and brings their hands up to his face, kissing the back of Alex’s hand. “Them hating me is the thing to worry about, isn’t it?”
“In a normal situation, yeah,” Alex agrees, squeezing Willie’s hand. “But… this is the first time they’ll see me with a boyfriend. It’s—it’s going to be the first time I’m gay to them.”
Willie frowns. “Babe, you came out to them almost three years ago. They’ve known.”
“But they’ve never—do they understand? They’ve never had to see it.” He looks up at Willie and Willie’s eyes lock on to his immediately. They’re confused but curious and, most importantly, not judgmental. Not that Alex thought Willie would be—a part of him knows his worries are stupid. But another part of him—“What if… You know, there are those people who—they, like. It’s like. Yeah, they ‘don’t care’ when people are gay but they don’t want to see it? What if my parents are like that? And they’ve just been trying to convince themselves it’s okay all along because they’ve never had to see me with a guy?”
“Then they’re dicks,” Willie says simply, as if it’s that easy of an answer. Alex isn’t sure if it is that easy of an answer though, because they’ve tried, and maybe if seeing him with Willie is a struggle they just need time to adjust. But he also understands where Willie is coming from and—yeah, if his parents asked to meet Willie with Alex and then decide they don’t like what they’re seeing… they’re dicks. “But Alex,” Willie says, “your parents know you’re gay. Your mom already saw you with me and thought we were dating once and she was fine with it. It’s not like I’m going to be shoving my tongue down your throat—”
“Shame,” Alex quips.
Willie narrows his eyes. Alex smirks. “—In front of them, either, but,” Willie continues, “to be fair, that’d be uncomfortable for anyone, no matter your sexuality.”
“Yeah,” Alex agrees, dropping his eyes to their hands. “What if they don’t like us holding hands?”
“Alex, you’re catastrophizing everything right now,” Willie murmurs gently, and presses his lips to Alex’s hand again. “You know we’re just going to sit at a table with them, make some conversation, and eat some food. We don’t even have to hold hands. We can just get them used to us being next to each other if that’s how you want to do this.”
“It’s just—I have them back now,” Alex says, “but what if they leave again?”
“They won’t,” Willie promises.
“But what if?”
“Then… then you have us. You have me and the band and Brandon and Micah and your siblings. And none of us are your parents, but we love you all the same. Your life isn’t lacking in love. And I don’t want you to miss out on having a relationship with your parents, god, I don’t. But if it comes down to it, if they leave, or if you’re forced to walk away, you still have a family.”
“You’re my family,” Alex says. He blinks, and lifts his free hand to Willie’s face, tracing his thumb over his cheek bone.
“I am,” Willie says sincerely. “And I’m going to be here whether your parents are here or not. And yeah, it’d suck to lose them, there’s no way around that. But you’re never going to be alone, Alex.”
Alex drops his thumb from Willie’s cheek bone to his lips, and brushes against Willie’s lips. He leans over the center console of the car, meeting Willie halfway in a short but firm kiss. “I love you,” he says. “A latte,” he tacks on, smiling before stealing one more kiss.
“Love you a latte, too, Decaf,” Willie says, pulsing his hand in Alex’s. “Now, why don’t we go in? Before I go back to worrying they’re going to hate me.”
“They’re going to love you more than me,” Alex says, pulling his hand from Willie’s and opening the door. Willie opens his door as well and they get out, rounding to meet at the front of the car. Immediately, their hands connect again. “You’re a college student. You’re going to grad school. Willie, you’re like the son my parents have always wanted.”
“I’m pretty sure they’re overjoyed with the one—well, both, but, you get it—that they got.”
Alex tilts his head. “They’re more accepting now, for sure. Definitely happier now that we’ve been signed. But overjoyed?”
“Yes, Alex,” Willie insists. “They love you.”
Alex glances at him. “Then that means they’ll love you too, since they love me, and I love you, so by extension, they love you.”
“That doesn’t—”
“It makes sense.”
Willie scowls, but they’re inside and at the host’s podium before he can retort. Alex gives his last name to the hostess and she smiles at him, moving around the podium so she can wave her arms in a motion Alex takes to mean that she wants them to follow her. Alex steps off and trails behind her, tugging Willie along with him, who still seems nervous, but Alex figures that proving to Willie that his parents will love him will be the quickest way to quell those fears.
They’re led out onto the patio, and he immediately spots his parents. The hostess finishes leading him over and he thanks her, and then turns to his parents who have both stood from their seats.
“Alex,” his mom greets, pulling him in for a hug, not even letting him drop Willie’s hand first. She squeezes him once and then pulls back, and then reaches across him to grab for Willie’s hand, touching it gently. Alex relaxes at the gentle touch, at the ease of the touch, at her not pulling Willie in for a hug. Alex had told her that Willie was uncomfortable with people he didn’t know so well hugging him, and it seems she’d listened. “And Willie, it’s so nice to see you again.”
“You as well, Mrs. Mer—”
“Cheryn, Willie.”
“Cheryn.”
Alex turns to his dad then and holds out a hand. “Dad.”
“Alex,” he nods, reaching back to shake his hand.
“Uh, this is Willie,” Alex offers, motioning to Willie, once they’ve dropped hands.
Willie pulls his hand from Alex’s and reaches out towards Alex’s dad. “It’s so nice to meet you, sir.”
“Please,” he says, “if you’re calling my wife by her name you may as well call me by mine. It’ll be Scott to you.”
“Of course,” Willie nods.
“Well, why don’t we sit?” Alex’s mom suggests, motioning to the table. “We just got you two some waters, but if you’d like anything else—”
“Water’s great, Mom,” Alex nods, moving to take a seat, while pulling Willie’s chair out for him. Willie shoots him a surprised look and Alex grins back at him as he takes his seat.
His mom starts up again, “We didn’t know what you’d like, Willie,” she says, “so we tried to choose a restaurant with more options. Alex said you’re not a vegetarian or anything, but lord knows how picky of an eater he is—”
“Hey!” Alex protests, leaving his mom and dad laughing across the table.
“—so we didn’t want to leave you eating something you didn’t like,” she finishes.
“Oh, I’m not really picky at all,” Willie says. “I grew up eating foods from all around the world—my mom is… really adventurous, you could say,” he laughs, glancing at the menu. “She’s from Japan, too, where eating fish ey—well, maybe I shouldn’t talk about that before lunch. But, I’m not picky, I promise.”
His mom hums. “We’ll keep that in mind for the future.”
They all take a few minutes to figure out what they want before placing their orders, and once the waiter leaves, Alex’s dad turns to Willie. “Alex tells us you’re at UCLA?” He rubs his chin, as if he’s sizing Willie up. “What do you study?”
“I’m a psychology major with a business minor,” Willie answers.
“Oh?” his dad asks. “What’s the connection between the psychology and business?”
“I’d—uh, I’d like to own my own practice one day? And I’m aware I’ll have to work with other business professionals and it’s not something that I’ll be able to handle on my own, but it’s something that I’d like to have an understanding of,” he explains. “Business minors really only get the basic courses, but that’s enough where I’m able to get a general overview of what I’d be taking on were I to open my own business—accounting, management, ethics, stuff like that.”
“Your own practice,” Alex’s mom cuts in, leaning forward on the table. “You want to be a therapist?”
Willie takes a sip of his water and shakes his head. “No—well, not exactly. A psychiatrist. Who sometimes work as therapists, but who largely work as the doctors diagnosing and creating treatment plans for patients.”
“Doctors,” Alex’s dad repeats. “So you’d be a doctor? Get a—a PhD and all that? That’ll take, what, an extra four or five years?”
“That’s the plan,” Willie says. “It’s… it’ll take a lot of work, I know. But it’s something that I’m really passionate about. It’s like—psychiatry is my music. Alex put everything he had into making the band work out because it’s what he wanted, what he wants. And this is what I want, even if it takes me a little longer to get there.”
“Well I think it’s admirable,” his mom says, nodding once firmly. “Being passionate about something is a great thing, Willie. It’ll take you places. Like to your own practice,” she smiles.
“Thanks,” Willie grins.
Willie asks about what they do then, and Alex’s parents go over their jobs as a lineman for the power company and a nurse at the ER. Willie listens attentively and asks questions in all the right places, showing that he’s actively listening, and Alex can tell that his parents are impressed.
They talk about Julie and the Phantoms—about how starting in the recording studio has been going, now that their record label has settled on the songs they want on the album—and they talk about what classes Willie is taking this semester, and where Alex’s parents are planning on going for vacation for their anniversary. They find other things to talk about in between, and the table is never still, never silent. Alex doesn’t even have time to be anxious that his parents are going to be upset about seeing him with Willie, especially because it all just… feels comfortable.
When Willie lays a hand on Alex’s forearm when he brings up something that Alex said to him a few weeks ago, his parents don’t bat an eye. And when Alex hides his face in Willie’s shoulder in embarrassment when his parents bring up a childhood story about Alex, all they do is laugh. And when Willie steals some of Alex’s fries, and Alex steals a bite or two of Willie’s coleslaw, they give each other a sly, fond look, but there’s nothing angry or upset behind it.
Alex can tell Willie has relaxed now that he’s realized Alex’s parents don’t hate him, just as Alex said they wouldn’t.
They finish their lunch not too much later and say their goodbyes, parting ways in the parking lot, where Willie and Alex are holding hands and his parents don’t so much as blink at them. Again. So, huh. Maybe this is legit.
Once his mom and dad finally turn to head towards their car, Alex tugs Willie towards his own, releasing his hand when they get to the front bumper so Willie can get to the passenger’s door. Alex unlocks the car and they both get in, and both immediately turn to the other, saying, “I told you.”
“No, I told you,” Alex shoots back, furrowing his eyebrows. “I said they were going to love you and they do.”
“And I told you they were going to be fine with you and me,” Willie says, leaning towards him. “And they were.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Alex mutters, leaning in and connecting his lips with Willie’s. Willie hums, reaching up a hand to curl around Alex’s face to hold him in place, and then he pulls back.
“I’m proud of you,” he says in a soft voice. Even though they’re alone in Alex’s car, it’s private, intimate. It’s Willie genuinely being proud of Alex for something that he knows that Alex was struggling with. Alex feels his chest swell with happiness and he leans in to kiss Willie again. Willie kisses back, and Alex swears it could be three seconds or three hours—he never knows with Willie. Something about Willie ruins his perception of the world around him, even time. But when they pull away, they’re both grinning wide. “Love you,” Willie whispers.
“Love you,” Alex says back.
(*)
“Your cat’s a fucking cheater,” Willie says as Alex walks in to his room after he finishes in the shower, slipping a shirt on. He shakes out his hair, running a hand through it to get any loose droplets of water, laughing when some seem to land on Cheeto. She freezes before launching herself onto Willie and burrowing into the blankets, peeking out cautiously.
Alex wipes his hands off on his sweat pants so they’re not wet anymore and moves over to the bed so he can pet her, and leans over to kiss Willie at the same time. “Why is she a cheater?” he asks, shifting his head up to kiss Willie’s hairline.
Willie leans into Alex and hums, reaching up to curl a hand around his neck and guide him into another kiss. “Hi,” he says.
“Hi,” Alex greets back.
“You were gone when I woke up.”
Alex laughs. “Sorry. I just went for a shower.”
“Hm,” Willie hums, and tugs Alex down onto the bed.
Alex goes, and arranges himself so he’s leaning up against his headboard, and Willie curls into his side, resting his head on his chest. “Why are you calling my cat a cheater?”
“Oh,” Willie says. “She couldn’t get the toy on the string, so she attacked my hand instead.”
Laughter bursts from Alex’s chest and he reaches across Willie to scratch Cheeto’s ears. “Good girl,” he says.
“Good gir—good girl?” Willie echoes in mocking disbelief. “She maims me and you praise her?”
“I’m so sorry,” Alex says, lifting Willie’s hand and pressing a kiss to it. “There, did I kiss your booboos better?”
“Not the emotional ones,” he huffs jokingly.
Alex smiles and leans down to kiss him on the lips, taking care to hold him close and tight. He pulls Willie closer just as he pulls away, and then kisses his nose, and then his forehead. “How about now?” he murmurs against Willie’s skin.
“Hm,” Willie hums. “Maybe.”
Alex laughs, but presses another kiss to his forehead before pulling away. Willie leans his head on Alex’s shoulder and Alex smiles down at him though Willie can’t actually see.
He still hasn’t quite figured out how he ended up here with Willie. It was only around this time last year that they actually finally became friends, let alone that Alex admitted that he liked Willie—platonically. It would still be another three months before he figured out that he was in love with Willie.
Willie claimed he always knew. Both his feelings and Alex’s—well, he was really rocky on Alex’s for a while, but by the time Alex had realized his feelings, Willie had figured it out too. But Willie had felt that anything that came out of their relationship had to come from Alex. He knew and understood that Alex was more reserved with his relationships and he could deal with that. It just meant waiting. And he was willing to wait if it was Alex. He admits that it took Alex much less time than he thought it actually would to get to their relationship, but he agrees that their relationship has always been intense. The intensity definitely helped Alex realize his feelings and pick up on Willie’s as well.
They’ve had to figure out how to navigate their relationship over the past nine months, but if Alex is being honest, it hasn’t been a hardship. It’s been really, really fun. Willie makes everything fun. Willie makes everything worth it. And it’s not always a breeze, and it’s not always a no-brainer, but it’s always something that they get to do together, that they get to talk about and decide, and that always feels worth it in the end. Some of the discussions have been heavy, some of them light, but none of them have been difficult to the point where Alex actively tries to delay them. He wants to figure out his life with Willie. Because he wants a life with Willie.
Then there are the times the doubt sneaks in—where he wonders why Willie is with him, and those times are never fun. Because he can’t figure it out, no matter how hard he tries. He can accept that Willie loves him on his good days, but on his bad days, he can’t process it. His mind won’t accept that someone like Willie has chosen someone like him. Because it doesn’t add up in his head. Willie is good, and kind, and happy, and helps people, and betters lives, and betters the world, and cares—so much. And Alex is… Alex. He’s good, and he likes to think he’s kind, but he’s anxious, and he wouldn’t know where to start if someone needed his help, and he doesn’t make anything better other than the music he plays.
Willie tells him he’s wrong between kisses, telling him that he makes Willie better, that he makes the world a better place by putting his music and message out there, and that he doesn’t need to be a psychiatrist to help people—telling his story is plenty of help, and will change lives. Alex fights to believe him, but… it’s hard. Especially because Julie and the Phantoms are still only just picking up traction as a band under Destiny Management. Sure, they’ve boomed from just under five hundred thousand followers to just under three million. And sure, he’s gotten messages about his bravery for coming out. But—it doesn’t feel like much. It just feels like… life. And his life is small compared to Willie’s, he thinks.
“What are you thinking about?” Willie asks, scooting in closer and pressing a kiss to his neck. “You’re tense.”
“Uh,” Alex frowns, trying to come up with something other than their relationship, because he knows Willie loves him. It’s just that he struggles with it sometimes. “The album,” he makes up quickly.
“Yeah?” Willie asks. “What about it?”
“We’re looking at wrapping up production on the album next week,” Alex says. “So in the new year we’ll only have to worry about post.” He slips a hand under Willie’s shirt and strokes his hand up and down his back, fingers dancing along his spine. “And then they want to talk about us doing promo, which—they’re talking about, like, late night shows. SNL was even thrown out there, because apparently SNL is taking like, anyone who will come on, now.”
“Yeah, I haven’t seen many episodes lately but I don’t know half the people,” Willie admits. “But that sounds good for you guys. And I know you’re excited to finish production. It’s been a long time coming.”
Alex hums. “Yeah, but, like, I wouldn’t really change anything? Everything has been amazing. Destiny has worked with us and really makes everything sound like ours.”
“Well, they signed Julie and the Phantoms, no one else,” Willie reminds him, picking up Alex’s hand and playing with his fingers. “They wanted you guys.”
“Yeah,” Alex says, “but like, that’s always what people say, and then, like, they don’t actually want you, you know? Sunset Curve had to back out of a few deals because they wanted to change us.”
Willie twists Alex’s ring on his finger. “Well, they were dicks,” he says simply. Alex laughs, and Willie smiles. “What? They were. You don’t need to be changed. In any capacity. Destiny is doing it right by letting you guys do your thing.”
Alex smiles down at him and pulls him in closer. “Yeah,” he agrees, because if there’s one thing he’s proud of in life, it’s his music. But—“They were also talking about us touring.”
“Yeah?” Willie asks. “Headlining?”
“Eventually. They want to see if they can get us on as an opener for someone next year, and then the year after we’d headline.”
“Two years in a row?”
Alex bites his lip. “Yeah. But—the opener would only be a North American Leg, you know? So only a few weeks.”
“Hmm,” Willie hums. “That’s still good for you guys, though. Do they know who you’ll be opening for?”
“They have two that they’re talking with right now—you. You’re not mad?”
Willie recoils in his arms. He looks up at Alex. “Why would I be mad?”
“Touring is a big deal,” Alex murmurs. “Reggie and Bobby had a massive discussion about it when Bobby got his first tour.”
“And we’re going to have to, too,” Willie tells him, rolling over so he’s laying on Alex’s chest. “But I’d rather wait until we know the specifics. I mean, I knew what I was getting into when we started dating,” he says. “Alex, I called you my boyfriend for the first time at the Orpheum, as you were actively trying to get signed. I’ve always known that you were going to be touring, and I’ve accepted it’s going to be a part of our relationship.”
Alex stares at him, wondering how the fuck he got this fucking lucky. “And you’re okay with it?”
“I mean, I’ll have to reevaluate come tour time, but, like, you’re who I wanna be with.”
“And you… you know I wanna be with you too, right?” Alex says. “Like, I know it’s gonna be hard, and we’re going to have to figure things out, but, like, you know that you’re what I’ve chosen. Right?”
Willie hums, shifting on his chest so he can crawl up closer to his face. “I don’t care how hard it’s going to be, we’ll figure it out. I love you enough to know that I’m going to fight for you. Because—you know I’ve chosen you as well, right? Am actively still choosing you. Will continue to choose you. I chose you, I choose you.”
Alex tightens his arms around Willie. “I chose you, I choose you,” he echoes. “That’s how we move forward. Just… choosing each other, yeah?”
Willie reaches up and presses his lips to Alex’s. “Yeah,” he murmurs against Alex’s lips. “That’s how we move forward.”
(*)
Alex has taken a page out of Willie’s book now that he doesn’t work at Can Brew anymore. His free days are spent working on his music at Starbucks—so long his free days line up with Willie’s schedule. He tends to work on lyrics, sometimes he’ll bring his computer and headphones and work on melodies and harmonies, but his main goal when he’s at Starbucks is to spend time with Willie. With Micah as a shift lead, he doesn’t give a shit that Willie spends his time talking to Alex—as long as it doesn’t impact his productivity.
So Alex either sits at the table near Willie’s station, or he stands along the counter pestering him, just as Willie used to do at Can Brew.
He sometimes gets to meet people when he’s pestering Willie, most of them wondering who he is and why he’s pestering an employee. Some of them simply join in on the conversation they’re having, and others deliberately introduce themselves—he’s even gotten a few business cards. He supposes that’s how it goes in LA, and not only in LA, but near a college campus in LA, where everyone is trying to network. He wonders what it is about him that makes him stand out, or if perhaps some of the people might even recognize him, but are playing it cool.
He’s not quite sure what to make of—
“Hello,” the man nods at Alex. He reaches a hand out. “Caleb Covington.”
“Oh,” Alex says, raising his eyebrows in surprise. Alex shakes the man’s hand. “I’m—uh, I’m Alex.”
“Alex,” Caleb echoes. “You should work on introducing yourself,” he says. He tugs at the bottom hem of his suit jacket, straightening it out after dropping his hand back to his side. “No one will take you seriously if you can’t remember your own name.”
Alex frowns. He looks at Willie. “Mr. Covington,” Willie calls, saving Alex from saying anything else. “What do you do?”
“I own a few clubs throughout California like the Hollywood Ghost Club,” he answers. “So I’m a bit of an entrepreneur.”
“That’s interesting,” Willie says. “Alex and his band have actually performed at HGC twice, haven’t you, Alex?”
“Uh, yeah,” Alex nods, glancing at Caleb. When he finds Caleb’s eyes on him he immediately looks away. “Yeah, we—well, no. I played there once with Sunset Curve and once with Julie and the Phantoms, but—”
“Julie and the Phantoms?” Caleb cuts him off. “You played at the Orpheum last year, did you not?”
“Uh, we did.”
“Uh,” Caleb copies dramatically. “You’ll have to learn to speak if you want to get signed.”
“They actually already are,” Willie says, and when Alex looks at him, he can see Willie fighting back a grin. “They wrapped production on their first album about two months ago and they’re starting promo in about a month.”
Caleb scoffs. “Oh, yes, promo will go wonderfully with a band who can’t articulate themselves properly.”
“They get training before hand,” Willie explains, “and they prepare for interviews and they’re not put on the spot like you’re doing. It’s a completely different environment. Even if Alex does struggle, he’s a human. It’s fine.”
“Hm,” Caleb hums. “Of course… William,” Caleb says, emphasizing the William, even though Willie’s name tag says ‘Willie.’
Alex tangles his fingers together and looks up at him. “His full name is actually Willie, sir,” he says, working hard not to stutter.
Caleb turns a hard stare on Alex. “I see,” he says. “Well. When you’ve finished my order, I’d appreciate two mint leaves added as well.”
Willie tilts his head. “We don’t carry mint leaves.”
“I would expect an establishment as fine as this to have fresh ingredients,” Caleb huffs.
Willie blinks, tilting the cup he’s holding precariously. “Sir,” he says slowly. “Sir, this is a Starbucks.”
(*)
Promo for the album comes far too fast in Alex’s opinion.
One moment he’s in a recording booth, the next he’s on a talk show.
Fuck that, honestly.
But in all honesty, the interviews haven’t been as terrible as he had expected. He thinks the worst part is the travel—if you weaken his defenses enough he might even admit the worst part is being away from Willie for so long. But it’s something he’s got to get used to, because touring will be for longer, and will be more intense. But he still will fight for Willie through that, so a few interviews in New York should be nothing.
The beginning of interviews always feel awkward, so he tends to tune them out and let Julie and Reggie handle them, hopping in when he actually has something to add. It doesn’t take long into this interview, which isn’t surprising since they don’t have thirty minutes like some of their radio interviews. So Alex is alert, and when Jimmy broaches the subject of relationships, he braces himself, knowing what’s likely to come.
“Luke and Julie, you’re in a relationship,” Jimmy says, pointing between the two of them.
“Correct,” Luke nods.
“And Reggie,” Jimmy says, tapping one hand on his desk and pointing his other at Reggie, “Bobby Shaw has spoken about his relationship with you a few times over the past year.”
“Yeah, we’re together,” Reggie grins.
Jimmy turns to Alex. He leans in, putting on a desperate act. “Come on, man. Give the fans some hope. You’re single, right?”
Alex laughs, shaking his head. “I’m sorry if any fans are upset by it, but I’m not.”
“No!” Jimmy cries, slamming his hand on the table. He sits up straight and straights his tie, then clears his throat. “Sorry, I—the spirits of thousands of teenage girls just possessed me.”
Alex snorts. “Well exorcise them, because they wouldn’t have a chance anyway; I’m gay.”
Jimmy freezes, clearly not having expected that. “You’re—oh! I’m sure there were some teenage boys possessing me as well,” he covers. “That’s great, though! The—well, sure, you being gay, but your coming out!”
He shrugs. “It’s not as scary, not when Reggie was out as bi because of Bobby before we started any press. I just don’t have a famous boyfriend to go around telling the world,” Alex teases, leaning over to look at Reggie.
“I can get you one, I’m sure, but I don’t know how Willie would feel about that,” Reggie grins.
Jimmy jumps on that. “Is that your boyfriend—Willie?”
“Yeah, he—he’s great. We met because he worked right around the corner from where I worked, and it all sort of spiraled from there.”
“Oh, it definitely spiraled,” Julie mutters.
“Wh—what?” Jimmy asks, curiosity getting the better of him.
Alex feels his face heat up and he buries it in his hands.
“This boy had the biggest crush on Willie,” Julie says, “but for the first two months that he knew him, you know what he convinced himself?”
“What?” Jimmy asks, leaning forward in his chair.
“‘Guys, I hate Willie so much,’” Luke mocks.
“‘Willie is such an asshole,’” Reggie imitates. He freezes. “Wait, can I say asshole?”
Jimmy laughs. “Why did you think you hated him?” he directs towards Alex.
“So, I should say that the first time we met, he ran me over with his skateboard. And then the second time we met, he implied his work place was better than mine. And in my head I just categorized him as an asshole and… even when I got to know him and got a crush on him, my mind still had him labeled like that.”
“You should probably have a talk with your mind,” Jimmy insists.
“Listen… I know,” Alex sighs. “My mind still labels Pluto as a planet.”
“The world runs,” Luke says, “but Alex’s mind walks.”
“Hey,” Alex huffs. “Not always. Sometimes it sprints fast enough to catch up!”
“Sometimes,” Reggie mumbles.
Alex shoots him a glare across the couch before he turns back to Jimmy. “So—I was convinced I hated him, but I didn’t, and now we’re in love, and it’s got a sappy ending like that, and it’s embarrassing but great.”
Jimmy laughs. “Well, congratulations to you two—to all of you. Successful relationships, and a successful debut album. But—it’s interesting. Even with all of you being in long term romantic relationships, you have very few romantic songs. Can you tell us a little bit about why that is?”
Julie nods. “Well, Jimmy—”
The rest of the interview passes fairly quickly, and soon enough Alex is back stage pulling out his phone, texting Willie. When Willie’s answer comes within a minute, Alex knows he’s free, so he presses the phone icon in the corner, watching as his screen lights up with a call. He brings the phone to his ear.
“Hey,” Willie answers easily.
“Hi,” Alex says.
“How’d it go?”
“Good,” Alex tells him. He’s being completely honest, too. It was stressful—what with it being their first late night talk show, but he felt comfortable with the band with him.
“That’s good,” Willie says, and Alex can hear his sincere grin down the line.
He pauses, and then, “I came out, too. And Reggie mentioned you.”
“Yeah?” Willie asks. “You’re not keeping me your dirty little secret? I won’t be just another regret? Who has to know?”
“No,” Alex says quickly. “And also, thanks, now that song is going to be stuck in my head.”
“Yeah, I’m regretting it because it’s already playing on loop in mine.”
“You made your bed, now lie in it,” Alex teases.
“Hm,” Willie hums. “Apart from coming out how did it go?”
“Good,” Alex says. He recounts it to Willie, telling him also about the other celebrities that he’s gotten to meet during his trip to New York and interviewing process. Willie listens raptly, asking questions every now and then, and when Alex finally runs out of things to tell him, they’re loading the car to go back to the hotel. Reggie is on the phone with Bobby, Julie with her Dad, and Luke is texting with his parents—a rocky relationship that Willie has been trying to work his magic on.
“Tell me about what’s going on for you,” Alex murmurs, and listens as Willie rambles about the start of his new classes, about the term paper he’s been assigned in one of his classes and the ideas he has for it. Alex is more than happy to hear him talk about these things even if he doesn’t necessarily understand half of what his boyfriend is saying. Willie always takes the time to explain himself to Alex, though, which Alex appreciates, and makes him feel like Willie genuinely wants to share his life with Alex.
Once they get to the hotel, the band goes their separate ways to their rooms. Alex falls onto his bed, pulling his charger out and plugging in his phone, having learned from the past that talking with Willie constitutes his phone being on the charger at all times.
He and Willie talk for another few hours—about clubs that Willie is in, about their families, about their work, about shows they’re watching, and then they watch an episode of The Witcher together before Alex yawns so hard his jaw cracks. He can’t get away with it and Willie decides it’s time for them to say good night, so Alex shuts his laptop down and drags out his good night with Willie, even though Willie absolutely knows what he’s doing. He allows it though, because he misses Alex, too.
Finally, though, they can’t stretch it out anymore, and Willie sighs. “Go to sleep, Alex.”
“Fine,” he murmurs, eyelids half closed already. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow?”
“Yeah,” Willie agrees. “I love you a latte,” Willie says.”
“I love you a latte,” Alex echoes with a smile. He hums. “Hey Willie?”
“Yeah?”
“I chose you, I choose you. Everyday.”
“Me too, Alex,” Willie says. “Go to sleep.”
“Yeah,” Alex says, and then the phone disconnects.
Alex does fall asleep quickly after that, with the thought of Willie in his mind, and the knowledge that they’ll keep choosing each other day after day, and even on days like today, when they’re separated by thousands of miles, they’re still together, they’re still in love, they’re still choosing one another.