Chapter Text
Uraraka’s sudden departure was the only thing class 2-A talked about that night and the next day. Fortunately, they couldn’t bombard Uraraka with their stupid questions since there wasn’t any cell service in the campground. Unfortunately, that meant that they pestered Katsuki. It was all Katsuki could do not to physically shut up every single one of his classmates, even the ones who didn’t say anything. They all looked at him with something in their eyes reminiscent of pity but it couldn’t possibly be that because if it was, Katsuki would kill them.
When camp officially ended, Kirishima decided he wasn’t going to leave Katsuki’s side in an attempt to cheer him up. That only served to make Katsuki angrier.
“At least you got to do the last training session!” Kirishima reminded him as they stowed their gear underneath the bus and boarded.
“Whatever. It was boring anyway,” Katsuki grumbled as he headed toward a window seat at the back of the bus. Kirishima gave him an understanding smile and plopped into the seat next to him. Katsuki had a feeling the trip back would be irritating at best. Part of him wished he could sleep through the bus ride but he knew he couldn’t.
“You look tired, man,” Kirishima said quietly. Katsuki rolled his eyes.
“Thanks,” he responded sarcastically.
“Just saying. Did you sleep at all last night?”
“No,” Katsuki answered honestly. After Uraraka left, Katsuki was left in a weird state of euphoria and heartache. Closing his eyes for even a second only left him seeing Uraraka’s empty stare when she left the Emergency Center. Katsuki shook his head at the memory and turned his attention toward the campground.
“I know you’re worried.”
Katsuki side-eyed his friend.
“Worried about what?” Katsuki asked. Rage bubbled inside him. He desperately wanted to be left alone but everyone was determined to make this shitty situation worse for him.
“You know--this and that,” Kirishima said cryptically, glancing at the other students finding their seats on the bus. Katsuki looked back out the window.
“I’m fine.”
“Well, when you went after her I thought--you might have-” Kirishima stopped and made a talking gesture with his hand. Katsuki inhaled in response.
“We didn’t.”
It wasn’t entirely a lie. They hadn’t discussed what Katsuki had resolved to tell her but actions speak louder than words. He’d said enough.
“Oh,” Kirishima said in obvious disappointment. “Sucks that you didn’t get to--oh, is that why you couldn’t sleep?”
Katsuki shook his head. Kirishima waited for more but Katsuki didn’t give it to him.
“Oh, come on! I won’t blab,” Kirishima muttered. Katsuki’s eye twitched remembering how well he kept that promise the last time. “For real! Lips sealed.”
“I doubt it. I don’t need Pink-Ass meddling where she doesn’t belong,” Katsuki replied.
“That won’t happen! Come on Bakubro,” Kirishima pleaded.
“No.”
Kirishima sunk into himself and took out his phone. Deep down, Katsuki figured he needed someone to talk to but it certainly wasn’t going to be Kirishima. If he did blab, which he likely would, it wouldn’t only affect Katsuki and he couldn’t live with that. He’d wait until school started up and tell his therapist. That guy was contractually required to keep his mouth shut.
“Maybe you should let Ashido meddle,” Kaminari interjected from the seat in front of them. “Uraraka was due a kiss from the game. It could’ve been you if you weren’t such a relationship pansy.”
“That’s not what-” Kirishima said but had to stop to shove Katsuki back down in his seat.
“That’s it! I’ve had enough of you!” Katsuki screamed. Popping sounds echoed throughout the bus as Katsuki’s hands sparked.
“Whoa, man! I’m only joking!” Kaminari exclaimed, pressing his body to the back of the seat in front of him.
“Chill, dude,” Sero scolded. “Friends are allowed to give each other shit.”
“It’s not like I’m the only one that thinks that!” Kaminari added but paled at the death glare that Katsuki gave him.
Mr. Iida gave the boys a quick, authoritative glance that made it clear they needed to behave themselves. Iida mimicked his brother before haughtily adjusting his glasses and resuming his reading. Other classmates glanced back at them but didn’t linger. They found ways to keep themselves busy so as to not bring Katsuki’s fury upon them.
“Nothing to see here,” Kirishima told the others. Katsuki sat back down reluctantly. Sero went back to listening to music while Kaminari stayed pressed against the seat, wary of letting his guard down.
“Leave it alone, Dunce-Face,” Katsuki growled then addressed the rest of the bus. “And none of you know jack-shit!”
Kaminari scowled at him then grabbed one of Sero’s earbuds and plugged it in his ear.
Once he determined Katsuki wouldn’t murder anyone, Kirishima breathed out, leaned his forehead against the seat in front of him and played on his phone.
“Smooth,” Kirishima mumbled.
“Tch,” Katsuki sounded, looking out the window. The bus lurched forward and Katsuki watched the campground slowly disappear. Katsuki tried to sleep while his classmates dozed off and on around him but it was impossible. This was worse than the nightmares from the test. At least when he woke up from those, he knew whatever his mind had conjured up hadn’t actually happened.
When they finally arrived back to civilization, those who hadn’t let their phones die over camp were greeted by a text from Uraraka.
Uraraka: At the hospital. I’m sorry that I had to leave. We’ll talk when we get back. Promise.
Katsuki eyed Kirishima’s phone screen to see what he’d received. Apparently, Uraraka had texted the group chat that Katsuki refused to join.
Uraraka: Safe and sound. See you all at school.
Katsuki felt the muscles in his chest relax slightly with the knowledge that she had made it to her mother. The rest of their classmates would also be reunited with their parents as U.A. had requested pickups due to the uncertain times. By the time they arrived back at U.A., it was dark. Groups of adults waited in designated spots, their faces illuminated by streetlights. Seeing his mother among them wasn’t surprising but Katsuki had hoped she wouldn’t care enough to escort him home.
“Better safe than sorry, especially at night,” Principal Nedzu announced when they exited their buses. “Let all that you learned from camp soak into those brains and enjoy your time off before we start school in a couple weeks. Be careful everyone!”
Mitsuki chatted with Deku’s mother a couple meters away. Katsuki dreaded the walk home. There was no way he was going to talk to his mother about what happened with Uraraka and there was a one-hundred percent chance she was going to nag him about it.
“Looks like we’re walking together, Kacchan!” Deku said happily as he grabbed his stuff from underneath the bus. “Just like old times.”
“Get lost,” Katsuki snapped, throwing his gear onto his back and marching toward his mother.
“There he is,” his mother said with a smile when she saw him. “How was camp?”
Katsuki glared at his mother in response. Mitsuki’s smile turned into a scowl while Inko became more concerned.
“Oh, no. What happened?” Inko asked worriedly. She searched for Deku and let out a relieved sigh when she saw his green hair coming toward her in the crowd of students.
“Don’t worry. He’s fine,” Katsuki told Inko.
“We’d better be getting home,” Mitsuki said, refusing to take her eyes off her son. “Sorry, Inko. We’ll finish catching up later.”
Inko nodded, pulling Deku into a tight hug when he arrived.
“Hi, Mom,” Deku answered with a strained voice. “Missed you too!”
Mitsuki grabbed Katsuki’s elbow and led him away.
“Explain,” she commanded. Katsuki ripped his elbow out of her grasp and kept walking. Mitsuki blinked a couple times before softening her expression.
“Are you seriously not going to tell me what’s wrong?” She asked, matching his pace. “I can see it all over your face.”
“Why would I tell you?” Katsuki asked angrily. “You’ll only make me feel worse.”
Mitsuki nostrils flared and she looked back at the crowd that was still gathered around the buses.
“Do you even know how anxious I’ve been these past two weeks?” She whispered intensely. “You have no right to talk to me like that!”
Katsuki ignored her. The sooner he got away from the buses the better.
“Katsuki!” Mitsuki scolded. She touched his shoulder. “Please.”
Katsuki stopped. She wouldn’t leave him alone until she got an answer.
“I trained hard and there were no villain attacks. That’s all you need to know,” Katsuki muttered, looking away from her. Mitsuki pursed her lips and reached up to hold his face in her palm, stroking under his eye with her thumb. Katsuki hated to admit that it felt nice. He usually didn’t like his mother doting on him but he was tired and that made him weak.
“When was the last time you slept?” She asked softly. Katsuki tore his face away from her embrace. He stepped away and steadied himself.
“Let’s just get home,” he said. His lack of response to her question didn’t quell Mitsuki’s temper but she made the unusual decision to leave Katsuki be.
They walked in silence the entire way while his mother watched him carefully.
“Your father is traveling,” Mitsuki told him when she unlocked the front door. “Do you want to go out for dinner?”
“No,” Katsuki answered without hesitation, heading straight for his room. With a swift movement, he opened his door, dropped his things, and fell onto his bed. Katsuki remembered what Uraraka had said about sleeping being a hobby and was starting to come around to her point of view. Add it to the list of hobbies he didn’t have time for anymore. He closed his eyes, only to see Uraraka crying as she packed up her things to leave camp. With a frustrated sigh, Katsuki opened his eyes and grabbed his phone. He still needed to respond to Uraraka. He’d drafted and deleted over a dozen texts on the bus but everything he typed sounded stupid.
While he stared in a sleepy haze at Uraraka’s message, there was a knock at the door. Without waiting for Katsuki to turn her away, Mitsuki came in with some food.
“It’s yakisoba,” Mitsuki said. Katsuki turned off the screen and dropped the phone on his bed.
“I’m not hungry,” he mumbled, covering his eyes with his forearm.
“You should know very well that the food was only the key for entry,” Mitsuki whispered, setting the dish on his desk. “It’s always been that way.”
Katsuki turned away from her. With a click of her tongue, Mitsuki sat on the edge of Katsuki’s bed and placed a hand on his leg. For good measure, Katsuki shoved his phone underneath his pillow. Mitsuki eyed the hiding spot and pursed her lips.
“It’s late. Let me sleep,” he groaned.
“It’s not even ten o’clock.”
Katsuki exhaled in frustration and moved his leg out from under her hand.
“I know I’m hard on you sometimes,” Mitsuki whispered. Katsuki rarely heard his mother sound apologetic. It was enough to earn a look in her direction. “But I only want you to be the best you can be.”
Of course, she’d say that.
“I don’t want to do this right now,” Katsuki groaned. “I’m exhausted, angry, and if there was a person I wanted to talk to it wouldn’t be you.”
Mitsuki laid in bed next to him and Katsuki growled in annoyance.
“I didn’t see Uraraka leave your bus,” Mitsuki said knowingly. Katsuki’s jaw clenched at her name. “What happened?”
“I’m serious,” Katsuki said tightly. “Leave me alone.”
“Okay. You don’t have to talk about it,” Mitsuki replied. She began stroking his exposed temple and Katsuki hated how it made him relax involuntarily. “But unless you force me out, I’m here to stay.”
Katsuki debated it but his body was heavy.
“Don’t act all smug because I’m not kicking you out,” Katsuki grumbled, his eyes closing halfway. “Camp kicked my ass.”
“Mhm,” Mitsuki hummed, unable to hide the smugness from her voice. “Close your eyes.”
He reluctantly obeyed. As soon as he did, Uraraka running to the bus stop unable to keep the sobs down as she ran from the campground was projected onto his eyelids. Katsuki inhaled quickly and his eyes snapped open.
Mitsuki stopped rubbing his temple to rest her hand on his forehead.
“Oh, my smart, strong boy,” she whispered. “Whatever has got your mind in knots is not worth you losing sleep over.”
“The universe hates me,” Katsuki slurred. Mitsuki pressed back his bangs and kissed his forehead.
“The universe doesn’t hate you, just like I don’t hate you,” she said. “Sometimes it pushes us in directions we don’t want to go so that we learn and grow but it never does so out of hate.”
“I’m tired of that.”
“Learning and growing?” Mitsuki asked with a chuckle. “What did the universe teach you at camp?”
His mother assumed incorrectly. Katsuki was tired of getting pushed in directions he didn’t want to go. There was no learning or growing from the memory of Uraraka's face buried in the crook of his neck or the subsequent feeling of her tears falling onto his skin.
“That timing is a bitch,” he mumbled before falling into a hard sleep.
Katsuki awoke the next afternoon to his phone vibrating non-stop. With an annoyed groan, he pulled his phone out from under his pillow, noting how low the battery was, and saw that he had once again been added to the Class 2-A group chat.
Kirishima has added Katsuki Bakugou to the chat
Ears 🦻 : Bad move, Kiri. He’s gonna get pissed and leave
Purple Pervert: Idk Baku’s gone soft
Raccoon-Eyes 🦝: So what if he’s pissed!? We’ve got to work together to make sure she’s okay!!!!
Ears 🦻: She already texted us. She’s fine.
❄️👤🔥 : Uraraka reached out. That’s enough for now. She needs space.
Big Lips: of course she’s not ok. I wouldn’t be either
Dunce-Face: Mybe we should do smthing??? Like send flowers or chocolate or smthing.
Four-Eyes: Not a horrible idea.
Kirishima: Could show that we care about her without her feeling like she has to talk.
Dunce-Face: Im tellin you its a good idea!!
The Frog: Honestly, guys, I think it’s best to leave her be. She’ll respond to our texts when she can and we’ll see her when she gets back to the dorms.
❄️👤🔥 : Time is what she needs.
Dunce-Face: Oh cmon like gifts dont ease wounds
❄️👤🔥 : Not being forced into interaction also accomplishes this.
Deku 🤬 : I don’t know, Todoroki. She might have different ways of healing than you do. We could leave her be AND send her things.
Katsuki face-palmed. Whatever Katsuki decided to do, it wouldn’t be influenced by his classmates. Not to mention that the group chat was one text away from a full-blown argument about how best to deal with what was happening to Uraraka. Katsuki didn’t want to read it and didn’t want to be involved.
Katsuki Bakugou left the chat
Ashido did have one good point; there was one thing that Katsuki could do. Even if she didn’t respond, doing something was better than nothing.
Katsuki Bakugou: You good?
With a big stretch, Katsuki sat up and rubbed his eyes. He’d made a conscious decision to not respond to what Uraraka had initially sent him. She’d said they’d talk later and he’d stick to that. However, there was a void of unknown surrounding the coming weeks. With Japan in a state of panic, his old work study mentors either dead or on leave, and being stuck in a sort of relationship limbo with his training buddy, Katsuki didn’t know what to expect.
He stood up and stretched the rest of his body. There was one thing Katsuki could control: his body. Without another thought, he dressed for a run then left his house in a hurry. Katsuki was about to step onto the sidewalk outside his house when he felt his phone vibrate.
Uraraka: No.
Katsuki stared at the notification. He hadn’t expected a response that quickly.
Katsuki Bakugou: Are you at the hospital?
Uraraka: Yeah. I will be for the next few days.
What the fuck was he supposed to say? Katsuki looked up and down the road to see complete emptiness. It was exactly how he felt at this moment. Running would fill that. Shoving his phone in his pocket, his feet hit the pavement with a satisfying weight. It was as if each step lessened the weight on his shoulders. He ran until he couldn’t anymore. Leaning against a building, he pulled out his phone and texted exactly what he was thinking. It was better than obsessing over it.
Katsuki Bakugou: That sucks.
He caught his breath, stretched out his calves, and stared at his phone screen until she responded.
Uraraka: Yeah it does.
Katsuki clicked his tongue. Maybe he wasn’t cut out to be with Uraraka romantically. He had no idea how to act in these kinds of circumstances. Did he offer to talk? Did he leave her alone? Did he send her flowers like Kaminari suggested?
“Why is this so hard?!” Katsuki whispered-yelled as he deleted and restarted text after text. Apparently he took too long because Uraraka sent him another message.
Uraraka: Plus I’m not sleeping well. I feel bad about how we left things but I want to talk in person.
Katsuki stared, slack-jawed, at his phone screen. There was no way that Uraraka was concerned about that.
Katsuki Bakugou: Stop thinking about me and focus on your family.
He shoved his phone in his pocket and started running again. His phone vibrated a couple times but Katsuki needed to move. The thoughts swirling in his mind only quieted with physical exertion. Katsuki ran for longer than he should've. By the time he got home, his mother was making dinner.
“Are you stupid, Katsuki Bakugou?” Mitsuki raged as soon as Katsuki walked in the door. “Do you have any idea how close I was to calling the police?”
“Shit,” Katsuki muttered. He pulled out his phone to see multiple texts from his mom and a few missed calls. “I mean, I have a hero license. I can defend myself.”
“A provisional one!” Mitsuki snapped.
Katsuki read the other texts he’d received in quick succession, barely taking them in as his mother scolded him in the background.
Kirishima: Uraraka sent another text to the group chat. Did you reach out? If you did, thanks. I’m glad she’s okay.
Kirishima: Well as okay as one can be
Deku 🤬 : Have you talked to Tokoyami about getting in with Hawks for work study?
Dunce-Face: Were all pitching in to get Uraraka a gift card to her fav mochi place u in?
When he got to the last text he received only minutes ago, Katsuki felt a little spark illuminate the void ahead.
Uraraka: Okay, Bakugou. I’ll talk to you later ❤️
“Katsuki, I’m talking to you!” Mitsuki shouted. Katsuki rolled his eyes and prepared himself for a verbal battle. That heart would have to last him until school started up again.
Except it didn’t.
For a week, Katsuki was trapped in his mother’s clutches, unable to leave the house unless he was accompanied by someone else. With his choice being his mother or Deku, Katsuki locked himself in his room. Eventually he couldn’t take it anymore.
Shouji, Hagakure, and Satou had already moved back into the dorms when Katsuki arrived which wasn’t ideal but at least he didn’t have to deal with the suffocating presence of his mother. It didn’t matter when more of his classmates came back. Katsuki was barely there anyway. Physical exertion was the only thing keeping him sane right now. In the morning, he did laps in the pool until he couldn’t anymore. The afternoon was spent leveling Gym Gamma. Evenings were spent practicing sets in one of the dojos until his alarm went off. After Principal Nedzu found him hammering into a sandbag past midnight and almost put him on a real house arrest, he’d had to start setting one.
More of Class 2-A trickled back into the dorms but Katsuki didn’t care. He was waiting for the day that Uraraka would come in, maybe needing some help with her luggage as a way to get him alone, with her eyes back to normal and her face split in that grin that made Katsuki’s pulse spike.
Those thoughts only made Katsuki angrier. He shouldn’t be this fucking obsessed. There were more important things to worry about; but none of them occupied his mind.
The night before school was supposed to start, Katsuki fought one of the training dummies. Every hit was harder than the last. He was sweating and cursing profusely.
“Fucking die!” Katsuki screamed, kicking the dummy so hard that it fell to the ground. Breathing heavily, he picked up the dummy and went back to fighting it.
“Kinda hard to kill something that’s not alive,” a small voice said behind him. Katsuki turned so fast, he almost gave himself whiplash. Uraraka closed the door gently and set her bag down. “Sorry to interrupt. Deku said you’ve been training here.”
“Fucking snitch,” Katsuki muttered. “You get back this evening?”
“This morning,” Uraraka answered. She shifted her weight between her feet awkwardly. “Had to unpack. Figured I’d search the sign-in sheets to find you.”
Katsuki didn’t know why his temper flared at the thought of her having been here the whole day. He wouldn’t have noticed anyway. The dorms were full of people judging him or trying to get information out of him. He avoided it.
“Let’s fight,” Uraraka said tightly. She squatted down, pulled her grappling gloves out of her bag, and strapped them on.
“Don’t you need to warm up?” Katsuki asked. Uraraka froze.
“I don’t feel like dancing today, Bakugou,” she said quietly, a faint blush filling her cheeks.
“I didn’t mean that,” he replied roughly. He really hadn’t, so why had her answer hurt so much? Uraraka’s blush deepened.
“No. I’m fine. I did yoga with Todoroki this morning and did some training with Tsu this afternoon.”
Katsuki could feel sweat soaking into his hand wraps. They had been there for her while Katsuki was busy distracting himself. Why didn’t she text him? He would’ve dropped what he was doing if it meant he didn’t have to internalize this shit anymore.
“Ready?” Uraraka asked quizzically as Katsuki zoned out. With a quick nod, he settled in his fighting stance. Her eyes squinted slightly at him as if she was waiting for him to make the first move. When he didn’t, Uraraka went for a high kick. Katsuki blocked it effortlessly, using the open space to send his own kick straight into her stomach.
Uraraka fell to the ground and gave him a determined glare. Without breaking eye contact, she stood up and threw him a left hook. Katsuki caught her fist, twisted her arm, and pushed her to the mat.
“You should’ve warmed up,” Katsuki told her. Uraraka pulled her arm away from him and jumped up.
“Again,” she snapped. He immediately grabbed her waist and shoved her back down.
“Stop thinking. I can barely call what you’re doing fighting,” Katsuki said as she adjusted her shirt. With a guttural scream, she attacked in quick succession, forcing Katsuki to take defensive action. He was blocking high and low, side to side, looking for space to counter attack. Uraraka’s hits were getting harder and faster. Eventually she landed a jab to his ribs that made him wince but he’d let her have it. He had to in order to get an opening. His hands grabbed the arm that hit him and he swung her around, pushing her toward the mat.
Uraraka didn’t go down without a fight again. As she fell, she twisted her leg around his and tripped him, causing him to fall right on top of her. Katsuki caught himself, his hands on either side of her head, before he crushed her.
Breathing heavily, the two stared at each other for a few moments. It was clear to Katsuki that things had changed between them when Uraraka turned her head away from him, breaking their gaze, the color of her face reddening with every passing second.
Katsuki huffed and pushed himself upright.
“Done already?” Katsuki asked when Uraraka didn’t move.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to do this right now but-,” Uraraka paused before sighing defeatedly. “I think we have to talk.”
Katsuki had to hold back a groan. He knew this was coming but he figured it wouldn’t be in the middle of a fight. It was better than waiting at least.
He sat down, crossed his legs, and waited for Uraraka to sit up. She took her time, avoiding his eyes as she twiddled her fingers.
“I--I don’t want---I don’t think--”
Katsuki blinked slowly. She blabbered incoherently for several seconds before she stopped, took a deep breath, and clasped her hands together.
“I need us to stay friends,” she finally said. Katsuki stared at her.
“What?”
“I thought a lot about this. You’re right. I need to focus on my family which means focusing on being a hero. With work studies coming up-.”
Oh, right. He’d said that. Fuck. He hadn’t meant it like that--had he? Was he really ready for something more with her? He had dreamed about it, sure, but it was obvious he didn’t know what he was doing.
“-and with school only getting more difficult-”
Shit. Shit. He needed to fight for her. They both liked each other. There were other couples in their class. If they could do it, so could Katsuki and Uraraka.
“-I can’t have any distractions.”
Katsuki sat in silence, putting his argument together while she anxiously played with her fingers.
“I still want to go to dance class with you,” Uraraka tacked on. “But--I think that has to be it.”
“It doesn’t,” Katsuki protested. “We can-”
“Bakugou-,” Uraraka started.
“Stop! You always doubt yourself. We can handle this. If Dunce-Face and Half-n-Half can fucking figure it out so can-”
“No, I can’t,” Uraraka stated firmly. Katsuki shut up when she gave him a look that screamed ‘please stop’. “I need time and I don’t know how much I’ll need. Everything is changing around us right now and I can’t handle one more thing changing. It’s better that we stay friends.”
“You can’t honestly believe that.”
Uraraka sniffled and Katsuki realized she was holding back tears. Katsuki stood up and paced. He should have expected this. Uraraka was already against dating in high school. Katsuki didn’t have a clue how to be with someone in that way. He barely knew how to be friends. Of course she didn’t want that kind of relationship with him. Who would?
“It’s not like I want it to be like this,” Uraraka mumbled sadly. Katsuki froze. “Everyone, and I mean everyone, is counting on us to be our best. We can’t--” Uraraka shakily inhaled. “We can’t be somewhere else making out when an emergency happens. People need us. Every second matters.”
Katsuki’s hands shook. He didn’t know which one of his emotions caused it. There were too many to count.
“Fine,” Katsuki finally said. What was he supposed to do: Say she didn’t need time? Uraraka had made up her mind. He had to live with it.
“It’s not fine,” she whispered. “But thank you.”
“Do you want me to move on?” he asked. It was the question Katsuki didn’t want to ask but he wasn’t going anywhere if there was still a chance with her. Even if it took longer than he wanted.
Uraraka looked up at him, her entire body and face echoing how much his question had hurt her. She gulped and changed her position so she could hug her knees.
“If that’s what you want.”
“Is that what you want?” Katsuki asked more insistently.
“I’m not gonna ask you to wait for me if that’s what you’re getting at,” Uraraka said, slightly angry. “I’m not gonna string you along. If things change between us, I’ll accept it.” Katsuki almost would have believed it if her voice hadn’t broken on the last word. Uraraka furrowed her brow the same way she did right before she threw up. With a shake of her head, Uraraka got up, covering her mouth with one hand as she grabbed her things.
“I’m done talking,” she choked out before she left the dojo, slamming the door behind her.
Katsuki stood in the same spot for a few minutes, his body shutting down at the influx of intense, complex emotions. It was too much. He needed to do something. Katsuki looked back at the dummy and charged toward it, yelling as loud as he could. With as much force he could muster, he punched the dummy, sending it crashing to the ground. Staring at the fallen dummy, Katsuki experienced, for the first time, a hatred of the fact that being the best sometimes required personal sacrifices.
“Hey, man--whoa, someone spit in your spicy ramen?” Kaminari asked when Katsuki entered the common area.
“I haven’t eaten,” Katsuki answered curtly without thinking. He was such an idiot. Today had proven that tenfold.
“What? Isn’t it, like, past your bedtime?” Sero asked, making those around him laugh. Katsuki gritted his teeth and sparks popped in his palms.
“You okay?” Kirishima asked, getting off the couch.
“You!” Ashido yelled, marching toward Katsuki menacingly. “What did you do?”
Katsuki glared at her. He really didn’t have the mental capacity to not kill her right now.
“I didn’t do anything,” Katsuki said slowly, holding his temper back. If he lost what little control he had right now, there was no chance he’d gain it back.
“Why do you think he did something?” Kirishima asked earnestly.
“Ochako ran up to her room sobbing!” Ashido explained angrily. Katsuki’s throat closed. “She won’t answer anyone’s texts either! You were the last person who saw her so I know you did something stupid! What did you say to her?
“I barely said anything,” Katsuki told her. Ashido scoffed in disbelief.
“If you made Ochako cry like that, you’re gonna be very unpopular,” Hagakure said from one of the tables.
“Who gives a shit about that?” Katsuki snapped. Ashido slapped his arm, making his palms spark involuntarily.
“What did you do to make her cry, asshole?” Ashido pressed.
“Hey, maybe we should-” Kirishima started, forcing himself in between them.
“I didn’t do anything,” Katsuki repeated. “You should interrogate her if you’re that curious.”
“If you broke her heart, I’m gonna make your life a nightmare,” Ashido threatened.
“Mina,” Kirishima whisper-yelled. “Maybe you should-”
“What? He can’t play with Ochako’s feelings!”
The common room went quiet. Everyone was staring at him.
“Stop jumping to conclusions,” Jirou said, breaking the silence.
“What she said,” Kaminari threw in. Jirou rolled her eyes as Sero face-palmed next to him. Kirishima’s eyes darted to Ashido who looked uneasy.
“Then tell me what happened so I know how to act,” Ashido said bitterly to Katsuki.
“Nothing happened. Now leave me the fuck alone.”
Katsuki stomped toward the elevator and punched the button so hard it left an indent in his skin.
“Easy,” Kirishima muttered before entering into a heated debate with Ashido. Katsuki pressed his floor number with the same intensity out of spite. He’d break the elevator if it would make everyone shut up.
The elevator couldn’t move fast enough for Katsuki. By the time he made it to his room, tears had pricked his eyes for longer than he cared to admit. Anger, despair, frustration, heartbreak, betrayal, embarrassment, and other emotions he couldn’t narrow down in this state all boiled underneath his false, put-together exterior.
“Fuck this,” Katsuki muttered to himself before throwing down his bag and jumping off his balcony. The explosion he let off to rocket himself to the roof was much larger than he anticipated. It didn’t matter. Let him get caught. See if he gave a shit.
The night was cool and, best of all, quiet. Katsuki laid down and stared at the sky, forcing himself not to acknowledge the moon at the edge of the horizon. Uraraka had tried to teach him constellations during one of the campfires at camp but he hadn’t paid attention. He’d been too focused on how excited she looked.
“I hate that she’s right,” Katsuki muttered to himself. “Why the fuck is she right?”
“Right about what?” Ashido’s voice strained as she climbed onto the roof, clutching to a long piece of Sero’s tape.
“You’re about the last person I want to see right now.”
Ashido grimaced and sat a good distance away from him.
“I’m really sorry,” she said. Katsuki refused to look at her. “What I did was uncalled for. If you had done that to me, I would’ve thrown acid at you.”
“Apology not accepted.”
“Don’t be an ass,” Ashido hissed. “I’m being sincere. I care about Ochako but I care about you too. I shouldn’t have lost my cool and I shouldn’t have done that to you, let alone in front of everybody.”
“Whatever. I knew you didn’t trust me already. You can leave now.”
Ashido furrowed her brow.
“Something is wrong between you two and I just want to-”
“What?” Katsuki shouted, sitting up. “Help? Well, save your breath because there’s nothing for you to poke your nose into anymore.”
“What?”
“Like I’m gonna tell you,” Katsuki snarled. “Unlike Shitty-Hair, I know how to keep my mouth shut.”
“Stop blaming him for that. You know Kirishima can’t control his expressions. He would never tell me outright,” Ashido said. “You aren’t known for subtly. Everyone thought something was up with you two.”
“Great.”
He’d rather replay his earlier conversation with Uraraka again than sit here and be told he’d looked like a fucking idiot the whole term.
“Please tell me what happened,” Ashido pleaded, scooting closer to him. “I promise I won’t try to fix anything. I overreacted because Ochako was crying so hard it was just like-”
Ashido quieted and Katsuki could feel the unspoken words hanging above him. It had reminded her of the last night of camp.
“You know,” Ashido finished awkwardly. “I want you both to be happy.”
“Well, don’t fucking worry then. Nothing’s changed. We’re still friends. That’s all it’s gonna be. You can stop trying to get us together.”
Ashido hung her head, scratching at the exposed skin from a hole in her pants.
“You’re not subtle either, Pink-Ass,” Katsuki muttered before lying down to look back at the sky. “And your meddling, while annoying, is the least of my fucking problems right now.”
There was a long pause while Ashido watched Katsuki stargaze.
“Are you okay with just friends?” Ashido asked quietly.
“I have to be. This isn’t about me, right? I have to do what’s best for her, what she wants to do.”
Ashido scooted closer.
“I don’t think that’s fair,” Ashido said. “You can’t put her feelings above yours all the time. Have you told her how-?”
“Yes,” Katsuki interrupted. He didn’t want her to finish that sentence. “She’s worried we’ll distract each other.”
“I’m sorry,” she said softly. He tilted his head to look at her. Ashido seemed genuinely distraught. She crawled closer to sit next to him. “You know, it’s okay to not be okay.”
Katsuki sat up to glare at her properly. He didn’t need a fucking therapy session.
“You need to leave,” he snapped.
“It’s okay to not be okay,” Ashido repeated in a softer tone, begging him to listen.
“Stop that,” Katsuki said loudly. Tears once again pricked his eyes.
“It’s okay to not be okay.”
“Pink-Ass, I’m fucking serious.”
“You’re hurting. It’s okay-”
“No, it’s not!” Katsuki yelled. “You always think you’re helping but you make everything worse! So what if Endeavor is dead, All Might can’t help anyone, and there’s another war right after the last one? So what if that fucking nerd almost gets himself killed every day? So what if Uraraka doesn’t want to risk being more than friends with me? That doesn’t mean I get to wallow or--or-”
“Cry?” Ashido asked gently.
“Especially that! I have to keep pushing to be the best because if I’m not the best then--then what’s the fucking point of dealing with everything else?”
“The point is surviving, Bakugou. That’s what Ochako is trying to do right now. She’s terrified. Everyone is.”
“Well, I’m not,” Katsuki shot back.
“Yes, you are. Just not about the villains.”
Ashido tentatively reached for Katsuki who moved away from her.
“I’m sorry,” Ashido said again. “I’ll leave. You’ve got lots of people who care about you. We’re here if you need us.”
At last, Katsuki was alone. He barely wanted the stars and moon as company. At least they didn’t talk. He’d had enough talking today.
It was much later when Katsuki decided to go back to his room. All the lights in the dorms were off. Everyone was asleep except Katsuki.
He fell into bed as all of the physical exhaustion hit his body and the emotional exhaustion left him yearning for school the next day. Katsuki had never looked forward to homework more. It was better than dwelling on everything that happened the last couple months.
Sleep covered Katsuki like a weighted blanket. There was no need to move or think anymore. Katsuki didn't know if he could after the day he'd had. His body was forcing itself to shut off.
It was then that three rapid knocks came from his door.
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” Katsuki groaned, throwing off the blankets. One of the dummy brigade must have heard the explosions he used to get off the roof. Ashido must have told them to check on him or some shit. Katsuki prepped his quirk to throw an explosion in their face but when he opened the door his hand fell to his side.
“I’m sorry,” Uraraka mumbled, crying. “I know it’s really selfish of me to come here, especially so late, but I can’t sleep. I heard you come back down so I know you can’t either and-”
Katsuki shushed her and she hiccupped as she tried to suppress the tears streaming down her face. He should turn her away. It would be the wise thing to do.
Instead, he opened the door and allowed her to come in.
“Wow, it’s really nice in here,” Uraraka said, wiping her face. “It’s so clean and-”
Uraraka stopped talking at the look Katsuki gave her.
“Sorry. I’ll be quiet,” she whispered. Uraraka laid down on his bed, moving her back against the wall to give him room.
“I kind of thought you’d be mad at me,” Uraraka murmured as Katsuki laid next to her. “But all I could think about was how much I wanted to be next to you.”
“Don’t be stupid,” Katsuki said groggily. “I’m known for my patience.”
Uraraka laughed tiredly. She gave him a grateful look before burying her face into him, wrapping her body around his, and taking what little warmth he’d built up since he left the roof. Katsuki felt more at home with her in that moment than at any point during the last couple weeks. It was unfortunate. The fact that Uraraka had risked getting in trouble to be next to him didn’t help either. It almost felt as if their earlier conversation was only a nightmare.
“You’re a good friend,” she breathed, sinking further into him. Katsuki leaned his cheek against the top of her head.
“No, I’m not,” he replied softly. Uraraka looked up in muted shock as her own exhaustion caught up with her. Katsuki smiled weakly at her. “I’m the best.”