Chapter Text
Like children, the two sprinted through the winding halls, dodging guests and barely avoiding the scolding of maids and security. More than once, Xingqiu stumbled and nearly fell on his face, but Chongyun was always there to yank him upright.
Finally, after several minutes of exasperated cries and giggling, the two reached a secluded corner of the manor. Xingqiu pressed a hand to his chest, slumping against the wall. He hadn’t run that much since… Well, it had been a while.
Chongyun, meanwhile, was still upright and looking as if he was ready to do it all over again. His stamina was truly baffling. Other than the occasional gasp for breath and his rosy cheeks, he was calm as ever.
Except; “H-Hot-” He wheezed, and it dawned on Xingqiu that he’d broken his promise. “I’m… S-spirit, it’s…” When had Chongyun’s hands started trembling? Impressive stamina or not, Xingqiu supposed rapid fire emotion and a half marathon would be a bit much for his partner.
“Come here, love.” Without hesitation, Chongyun fell into his open arms, jittering and hot to the touch. “Do you mind if I touch your skin? To cool you off?” Xingqiu’s hands were resting on his back where his dark blue shirt covered.
He stifled a giggle as the boy furiously nodded against his chest. The Hydro Vision on his hip shimmered, and with the lightest of touches, Xingqiu brushed his fingertips down Chongyun’s shoulders, arms. It wasn’t as effective as a Cryo Vision, but the only person possessing one was already fighting a foggy mind. He’d be surprised if he could string a sentence together, much less process how to cool himself down with Cryo energy.
His hands came to rest on the boy’s neck, where it was especially warm. A bit of sweat mixed into the water, but Xingqiu didn’t mind. Chongyun only melted further into him, and he carefully lowered their bodies to the ground.
“May I touch your sides?” His voice was low, kept between the small space they shared. Another dazed nod, and the boy was at last simmering down. Thankfully the episode was mild this time. Chongyun would surely die of embarrassment if he wreaked havoc at an event as formal as this.
Xingqiu’s hands pressed into his soft sides. Perhaps it was a bit indulgent, touching his beloved Chongyun like a blind man would a marble statue. But Chongyun only sank further, further, until he was snuggled up against him.
When he’d finally reached a temperature that wasn’t feverish, Chongyun opened his eyes. Archons, they were stunning. Glowing as brightly as a glacier in the light of the moon. Intense and warm and oh-so kind. Voice a bit scratchy, he pressed his cheek to Xingqiu’s chest and said, “Thank you, Qiuqiu.”
You’re welcome , he thought, conveying it by carding a hand through that wonderfully fluffy blue hair.
They remained on the floor of some secluded hallway, where not even the other mischievous lovers wandered. Rich people and their absurdly large homes, tch. If he had to guess, there were probably a dozen other couples and groups stowed away somewhere in the manor, kissing, giggling. A few of them probably took it a step further, but neither Xingqiu nor Chongyun felt the need.
This was perfect.
However, sitting on the stone floor had his backside not only cold, but sore. “Dearest,” Xingqiu tucked a strand of hair behind the boy’s ear, gently smiling when it popped back out again. “-would you like to head home?”
A pair of arms snaked around his waist, and if he thought Chongyun couldn’t burrow any deeper into his chest, he was proven wrong. A light blush dusted his cheeks when he realized Chongyun was listening to his heartbeat.
“...Yeah. ‘M tired.” He slurred, and that was all the confirmation he needed. Then, with a grunt, he lifted the two of them to their feet. Even though they’d avoided the chaos of a full-blown episode, Chongyun was already half asleep.
Socializing wasn’t his strong point, after all, and being around people had worn the poor boy out. Coupled with a hard day of training beforehand and the hour nearing midnight, his dearest Chongyun was likely exhausted.
Heh, he didn’t even bother with the formal farewells that upper society expected of him. Hand in hand, the two slipped out one of the back entrances and walked home. Home, where no one would bother them. Home, where there was no need for fake smiles, nor pomp and circumstance.
Under the light of the half moon, he looked beautiful as always. Too dazed to call out the many glances Xingqiu stole, he only grunted and looked the other way. The chirps of crickets and frogs added a blissful ambience, and truly, truly … Xingqiu wouldn’t have it any other way.
At home, they were both tempted to just fall asleep then and there. After all, Chongyun’s bed looked awfully cozy, and both of their outfits were so complex. Neither really had the brain power to sort through all the knots and dangly bits.
The exorcist flopped onto his bed with a groan. “Please. Never take me to one of those again.”
“Now, now. You said you’d go, and my father would’ve had you hunted down if you flaked out on us. Besides, it wasn’t so bad, right?” Xingqiu sat down on the edge of the mattress to stroke his back. There was a faint line of freckles peeking out under his shirt, and he couldn’t help but trace them.
If Chongyun could purr, he might’ve. With each touch, he hummed serenely. “...Yeah. I really liked dancing with you, though.”
Though his face was buried in a pillow, Chongyun probably knew Xingqiu was grinning like a fool. He’d let a small gasp slip, while his hand stopped stroking his back.
“Aw, that’s awful sweet of you, love. If only that song could have lasted for an eternity… There, in your arms, nothing but the light of chandeliers and the melancholic refrain; It was perfect.”
Chongyun sat upright, his hair a bit tousled.
“ You’re perfect.” Xingqiu added, leaning in as if to kiss him. He’d wait, though. For his beloved exorcist to close the gap if he so wished.
And - oh, shit he’s actually doing it- Xingqiu braced himself, taken aback by Chongyun’s initiative. Their lips touched, only briefly, but he wasted no time pulling the exorcist back in. His lungs grew tight the longer they stayed connected, but the throbbing of his heart, the lightheadedness of their perfect night; he couldn’t help but smile into the kiss.
Could they perhaps go further, just as those young, dumb couples had? Chongyun had a fragile heart in a very physical sense, and too much stress could kill him. Xingqiu could never- would never- force him to do anything he wasn’t alright with. But…
His plea for permission came in the form of touching the boy’s side again, featherlight and pressing a little more each second. They broke apart for air, gasping, dizzy. Yet hardly a moment passed before they were back together, Xingqiu still testing the waters of closeness.
Fingertips toyed with the hem of his shirt, feeling underneath just a tiny bit for any hint of reluctance or displeasure. When Chongyun let out a little hum, a wordless go on, his entire hand slipped underneath the very expensive garment to map out his chest. The skin was soft, softer than an infant’s. Plush with a healthy layer of fat, but still firm and broad and strong in a way that made Xingqiu’s breath hitch.
It was then that Xingqiu pushed him back onto the mattress, taking things slow, gentle. That was alright. They didn’t need to be hard and rough with one another. Again, he inched a little closer to this unfamiliar, mature intimacy they’d never been able to try before. His tongue prodded at Chongyun’s lips, and the boy seemed confused.
Immediately, Xingqiu backed off. Breathily, he whispered. “Was that okay? Do you want to stop?”
Oh, oh how cute Chongyun was when he was flustered. His cheeks had taken on that poppy red once again, but it seemed he’d wrangled in his spirit for the time being.
“N-No, you’re good. I… Um…”
Pressing a gentle kiss to his nose, Xingqiu assured. “I promise it’s alright if we don’t do anything. Hell, you can tell me to go home and I would respect that.” Another peck on his nose, and “So, would you like to stop?”
He shook his head.
A chuckle, and Xingqiu traced a finger down his jaw. “You’re sure? Alright. Seeing as you’re at a loss for words, just tap my shoulder twice if you need to stop, okay?”
His frantic nod was equally cute. Life had a million and one different ways of tongue tying poor Chongyun, and he was often stuck relying on nonverbal gestures. Xingqiu wondered, if only for a moment before retaking his position on top of Chongyun, if they should learn sign language.
Rather than slipping his hand under Chongyun’s shirt again, Xingqiu tugged at the hem, as if to pull it off. He’d wait, Xingqiu would always wait. He was assured with another kiss, Chongyun propping himself up on his elbows, so their lips touched.
Archons. He couldn’t help but chuckle at how clumsy his hands were. Every loop of the sash, the silken fabric slipping through his fingers every chance it got. Hands fumbling, brain growing fuzzier with each languid kiss, heart throbbing, throbbing, about to jump right from his chest…!
Again, the two broke apart. As much as this little dance of theirs was charming and poetic, Xingqiu wasn’t nearly coordinated enough to divide his attention.
Breathless, he whispered against Chongyun’s neck. “ I love you, dearest. ” Their eyes met, and that was all the indication he needed. With tender hands, he slid each band and bangle from the boy’s right arm. Chongyun said nothing, but never once fought him or froze up.
The left arm was a touch more complex, with a silver chain connecting the bands on his forearm and bicep. As he worked each of them down Chongyun’s rosy skin, Xingqiu left a trail of kisses.
They say the lips are the most sensitive skin on the body. With each touch, he could feel the divots of scars, the trail of cellulite on the inner side of his bicep. The soft underside, the strong muscle tissue running the length of Chongyun’s arm. The silver band was discarded the moment it left Chongyun’s hand, but Xingqiu remained.
Bodies flush against each other, a hand snaked around the boy’s waist, Xingqiu peppered his lips on the inside of his wrist, reveling in the twitch of tendons when Chongyun’s hands flexed and curled against the touch.
He couldn’t help but leave a long, passionate kiss on the boy’s palm, rough with callouses. Brushing his lips across the life line, across each knuckle of his index finger. Ever so light was each kiss upon the boy’s fingertips, and Xingqiu finally opened his eyes to gaze into Chongyun’s.
Oh, how his cheeks were so deliciously pink! Those hands were so unfathomably strong, enough to break stone- yet still gentle enough to carve a marble masterpiece. Again, he mouthed I love you to the boy below him.
One piece at a time, he worked Chongyun out of the needlessly complex outfit. Piles of blue and white chiffon were discarded on the floor, and Chongyun was left shirtless propped up on his elbows. Panting.
They hadn’t even done anything. What a lightweight. Xingqiu had yet to undress, still in his heels and spats even, but straddling Chongyun with his hands on either side of the boy’s head, he gave a patient smile. How they’d even gotten into this position, neither were sure.
“Would you like to do anything more, dearest?” He brushed a tuft of hair behind a very red ear, waiting for a reply.
With shaking hands, Chongyun reached up as if to touch Xingqiu’s shoulder. Rather than their unspoken stop , he lightly tugged at the fabric.
He couldn’t help but giggle at his beloved exorcist. “You want to undress me now, don’t you?”
A nod, and he wriggled his hips as if to tell him; get off for a second. Doing as he was “told”, Xingqiu tossed himself down beside Chongyun, watching the nearly-naked boy scoot of the bed and skirt to his dresser.
With him turned away, Xingqiu took the opportunity to study his lover once again. Twas a pastime he would never tire of. The very sight of him made his mind sing ballads and pen memoirs. His captivating beauty took Xingqiu’s breath away back then, right now.
Forevermore.
His shoulder blades protruded a bit, shifting with each movement of his arms. A touch of his acne had once spread down his shoulders and back, and little brown scars were spotted across the skin. Xingqiu’s eyes traveled down, taking in the au natural rolls of his skin; how they would pan out when he stretched, or bunch up all cute-like when his body twisted. Perhaps it was the slight jiggle of his thighs, or the flex of his calves.
After a moment, Chongyun scurried back to their bed and set his own pajamas below a pair of Xingqiu’s. Ah, well… Perhaps they wouldn’t be going any further tonight. That was alright.
(He’d accepted long ago that their relationship was one that could never include sex. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t look forward to their closest equivalent- whatever that may be. They had all the time in the world to figure it out.)
Wordlessly, he again tugged at Xingqiu’s shirt. He was happy to oblige, just as they had that afternoon. Buttons were clumsily undone, the feather tie very carefully pulled apart and folded up on the bed.
Chongyun’s cheeks flushed an even deeper shade of red when his hands brushed across Xingqiu’s nearly-bare back; Heh, Xingqiu didn’t think it was possible for his blush to get any more intense. The next shade would be maroon!
Those same shaking hands started towards his shorts, hesitant to touch anywhere below the waist. But with a wordless nod, Chongyun swallowed hard and continued, pulling him to his feet and working the garment off.
Stepping out of it, the two now stood in nothing but their briefs. Xingqiu couldn’t help but burst out laughing at the silliness of it all. Nervous to touch one another despite dating for… how long?
It was a long moment- perhaps a touch awkward with how they both stood neither close nor far from each other in silence- and Chongyun seemed to be searching for the right words. Poor man was too flustered to find his voice, but Xingqiu didn’t mind waiting.
“I… Er- Do you… I-”
With each stutter, he hunched over himself just a little further, as if to hide his body once again. His serene look bled into one of hesitation, nervousness. Insecurity.
In an act of reassurance, Xingqiu gathered up his hands and tightly squeezed them. Hopefully it would be enough to ground him, and quell his insecurities.
“...Bathe?” He uttered, knowing his voice would lock up before he could form a proper sentence. “W-With me?”
Xingqiu gasped. This was certainly a first! And… Maybe their search for their sex-equivalent wouldn’t be so difficult after all. Closeness was what they two truly wanted. Sharing a space in a way only they could, vulnerable and open, free from judgment.
A way they could uniquely love each other.
A smile, a nod, and Xingqiu ushered the two to Chongyun’s little bathroom. Because of his fragile condition, the water would have to be rather cold; but who’s to say that snuggling right up to Chongyun wouldn’t warm him right up?
The exorcist busied himself with the bathtub, still choked up and too embarrassed to look his partner in the face. Meanwhile, Xingqiu sat atop the counter, kicking his legs like a child. He was perfectly content with this; his heart felt all soft, like sweet flower marshmallow candies, his cheeks dusted pink with tender anticipation.
Opening up about difficult things, stepping outside their comfort zones; indeed, little things like that made their relationship feel a bit more mature. But this was something else entirely, Xingqiu thought.
Wordlessly, he pulled open a drawer and shuffled around. Chongyun was a simple man, yes, but surely he had bath salts or scented oils, right? He let out a tiny huff of laughter when all he found was a little bottle labeled Qingxin Essence .
Gods, adding that to a hot bath would be absolute torture. The cooling essence of qingxin and the burning water would equal a very overstimulating icy-hot sensation that would knock even the strongest warriors on their asses.
But for dear Chongyun, it made sense. Cold + cold = spirit soothing. There came the sound of the tap shutting off. Xingqiu took that as the cue to disrobe- one easy step, and he was naked as the day he was born- and joined Chongyun at his side.
“You’re sure you’re okay with this?”
Chongyun’s voice was still frozen, and he managed a small grunt. He didn’t look at his partner. Instead, his ice blue eyes were fixed on the ripples of the water.
Xingqiu soothingly rubbed his shoulder, pressed a quick kiss to his cheek. In all honesty, this was a really big step for the man. Fully exposed with another person, especially after a big social event. He couldn’t help the pride that swelled in his chest.
“You can say no any time, I promise. Actually…” Xingqiu stopped rubbing, and for Chongyun’s sake, dialed up the embarrassment in his voice. “-I might not stay in the bath too long. I have fragile baby-skin, and it might just get frostbitten.”
Oh dear. Chongyun’s face twisted into one of guilt, and Xingqiu cursed himself for the wrong choice of words. “I-I mean… I’m just not used to cold water. After a while, this won’t be an issue.”
The tension melted from the boy’s shoulders, and with a preparatory deep breath, he shimmied out of his briefs and stepped into the cold water. This should be fine, right? Xingqiu traversed Dragonspine in shorts! Fought the dreaded Cryo Hypostasis with nothing but a bit of windburn by the end!
Like the chivalrous knight he was, he… acted a bit more like a damsel in distress. Held his hand out, waiting for Chongyun to take it, guide him into the bath. And the boy obliged, with very warm and clammy hands. (Xingqiu chuckled, of course. Clammy, clammy, clammy.)
“ Yah!” He cried on the first step. Shivered on the second. Let out a dramatic breath when they lowered all the way down, the water level rising and engulfing the two up to their shoulders. Already, Xingqiu was sure his lips were turning blue. With shaky hands, he grabbed hold of Chongyun and turned around, pressing his back into the former’s chest.
The exorcist stammered. “Wh-what are you-”
Xingqiu craned his neck, and as he spoke, wrapped Chongyun’s strong arms around his waist. “Keep me warm, would you?” He snuggled up further, further, nestled sweetly between the boy’s lap and suddenly… The frigid water didn’t feel quite so frigid.
Then he dared to recline, resting his head on Chongyun’s shoulder. A peck, two against his jaw. “Is this okay?”
His eyes were closed, and Xingqiu felt his arms tighten around his middle. Rather than speaking, he only uttered a small mmhmm, and returned a gentle kiss on the crown of Xingqiu’s skull.
Archons, this was perfect. They stayed snuggled together until the water actually got warm , and Xingqiu could feel the circulation in his limbs again. They took turns washing each other, Chongyun a bit clumsy, Xingqiu far too meticulous. To lighten the mood, Xingqiu let out a teasing moan when Chongyun lathered soap against his legs, inching higher, higher…
And it earned him an annoyed swat in return.
Washing and being washed was no big deal for Xingqiu. He and his brother had taken baths together until they were 5 and 8, and their mother always walked Xingqiu through a detailed check list to make sure every inch of him was squeaky clean. ( “Make sure you get behind your ears. And as far as you can reach, wash your back or you’ll get break outs!” she’d say, wanting her children to have perfectly flawless skin.)
Of course, Chongyun was a little hesitant. He allowed Xingqiu to rub the soapy rag up and down his arms, his shoulders. He got a bit antsy when it came to his neck, and snatched the rag away when Xingqiu started towards his chest.
“I got it.” He mumbled, ashamed.
Who was Xingqiu to tell him no, though? Insecurity was much like a parasite, feeding off of its host and forcing them to do things that keep them dangerously static. He’d made so much progress, socializing and committing to his career again. Daring to wear something far outside his comfort zone.
So if Chongyun would rather wash his own body, that was alright. (Though it was a little- just a little - disappointing. Xingqiu could try again another day.)
Alas, both men smelling strongly of qingxin and skin thoroughly pruney, they agreed it was time to get out.
Likewise, they dried one another off, gently, slowly. Chongyun went first, swaddling him in a towel and hesitating to touch any spot for too long. He’d only gotten to Xingqiu’s naval before drawing his hands back, implying poor Xingqiu was on his own.
It was almost cute, how respectful he was. But also a bit annoying.
Clean thoughts, Xingqiu told himself, making quick work. He dashed back to their bedroom to retrieve their night clothes, opting to dress himself this time. By this point, he was rather tired. Much as he loved Chongyun, it was getting difficult to keep his eyes open.
Clearly a cold bath had done very little to quell Chongyun’s temperature, because his cheeks to his shoulders were still flushed bright red. Nevertheless, the thrill of intimacy had clearly worn off from him as well, and the poor boy was blinking away tiredness as Xingqiu wiped down his arms, his back and chest.
He lowered to one knee, and Chongyun seemed to shrink in on himself, like normal. Sheepish as ever, but in truth, it was part of what made the boy so charming. Xingqiu swore to himself not to linger, not to provoke the poor man with a surprise grope of his butt.
Clean. Thoughts. Goddammit. Biting his lip, the boy finished up with the towel and tossed it over Chongyun’s face.
“Time for bed. Don’t dawdle. I’m still cold and I need a big, strong exorcist to warm me up.” A wink, and he ducked out of the bathroom before Chongyun could catch sight of the sudden blush on his cheeks.
Thank the Archons he followed shortly after, cotton sleep pants and a worn t-shirt, damp hair and the circles under his eyes looking a touch more prominent. A glance out the bedroom window and shit!- The sun was damn near rising.
Chongyun stifled a yawn, once again flopping down on his bed with a tired groan. Face buried in the mattress, he grumbled. “I’m sleepy, I’m clean. It's time for sleep.” Gods. Gods! Xingqiu felt his chest tighten and his head spin, his cheeks flush bright red and his heart tremble.
When they were children and he decided to crawl atop that wall to bother Chongyun, he never could’ve fathomed just how much love he would feel for a single man. He was kind and attractive, brave and determined and so, so loving.
And for once, Xingqiu found himself at a loss for words. From his spot on the edge of the mattress, he merely laid a gentle hand on Chongyun’s back and ran his fingers down the spine, lightly scratching.
Sadly, Chongyun couldn’t purr like a kitten. But the little contented hum was enough. Xingqiu was about to lay down himself, but his partner wriggled out from under his hand and much to his surprise, pulled Xingqiu into a tight hug.
“Wh- Yunyun, what’s this about?”
The first rays of dawnlight were peeking in through the window, illuminating Chongyun; that loving feeling in his chest only amplified, and dear Archons, he felt like his heart was about to burst!
Nose nestled against his neck, the exorcist mumbled. “...Love you.”
Xingqiu let out a dramatic strangled cry, crumpling in the boy’s arms. Hundreds, thousands of times they’d said those precious words to each other, and yet this was just so indescribably perfect, that he…
“I love you too, my dearest Chongyun.” The boy didn’t move, his breath warm, but light against Xingqiu’s shoulder. “I’ll love you forever and ever.”
“...But what if I ruin your life?”
For a moment, he was tempted to break away from the embrace and flick Chongyun on the nose. Such an absurd statement! Rather, he started rubbing comforting circles on his back, lulling away those ugly anxieties.
“You could never do that, love. Never, ever, ever.”
Chongyun huffed. “I could. Your family is full of beautiful people, and if we ever… er… m-marry, or something like that, then the whole public would see me and think your family is a big joke. A-and then they’d lose credibility and business reputation, and-”
His favorite spot was always just below the right shoulder blade, where most people could just barely reach. With a steady rhythm of his fingers, Xingqiu cut that thought off. “What the public thinks doesn’t matter. Only what you think of yourself.” There came that serene hum again, and Xingqiu pressed just a touch harder.
The man sighed, and their embrace came to an end. Slumped over himself, eyes cast on the ground. “Qiuqiu?”
“Hm?”
“Why do you love me?”
Xingqiu smiled. He’d rehearsed the answer to this dozens of times, knowing full well this should be an actions scenario rather than a words scenario. (He’d yet to master the art of both, but it was a work in progress.)
Their eyes met, and he urged Chongyun to lay back on the pillows. He let out a squeak of surprise, but didn’t fight each of Xingqiu’s movements. Leaning over him, Xingqiu watched for any trace of hesitance or nervousness, but the boy merely watched, a touch confused.
He cupped Chongyun’s face, plush and freckled and warm, and dove in for a kiss. Slow, languid, and his heart only fluttered faster. When he broke away to pepper his lips down the boy’s jaw, Chongyun let out a whimper. And for once, he let himself indulge in the moment, grabbing Xingqiu’s hips and pulling their bodies flush against each other.
My, my. This certainly felt familiar. Only hours ago were they tiptoeing this line. Xingqiu moved lower; he contemplated leaving a mark or two, dotting Chongyun’s collarbone in bruises. But that was more akin to marking his territory, not showing why he loved him.
Right over his throat, featherlight, and Xingqiu’s hands wandered down Chongyun’s sides. Lovingly touching the plumpness of his love handles, feeling out the firmness of his chest and back. Drifting back up to squeeze his biceps and touch the plush underside of his arms.
Higher, higher; Xingqiu carded his hands through the still-damp fluff of hair, scratching lightly and that serene hum sounded between them once again.
Once more, he moved to kiss Chongyun on the lips, so long that his head grew fuzzy. And, when they split apart gasping for breath, Xingqiu leaned in, noses touching. “I love you for everything that makes you who you are. I don’t mind if your body changes, but never, never change the pure heart inside of you.”
Chongyun only squeaked in embarrassment, his cheeks more flushed red than ever. “Y-You mean it?”
He leaned in closer, their foreheads bumping together. The heat on his cheeks made the lingering shiver of their shared bath disappear. “Of course, Yunyun.”
The sunlight creeped far enough that they were both enveloped, and at just the right angle, the darkness under Chongyun’s eyes was stark against the red of his cheeks. Goodness! How long have they been up now?
Without another word, Xingqiu laid himself down right next to his partner- his wonderful, perfectly imperfect partner- and pulled the quilt up to his nose. “Now, keep me warm, won’t you?”
Chongyun pulled him closer, tucking Xingqiu’s head right under his chin. “I will. Forever, and ever, and ever.”