Blarren Humfer
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“Oh! You mean Blaine.”
“Blaine?” Kurt asks, eyebrows raising, voice laced with both curiosity and confusion.
“My brother, the one I’m picking the bow tie out for. I’m pretty sure he knows, because I, like, never come in here otherwise. He’s addicted to this store. It’s all kinds of adorable.”
“Blaine,” Chris repeats, dumbly. “So you’re…”
“Twins, yep. Cool, huh?” Darren bounces on his toes like he thinks it’s the coolest thing in the world. “Fuck, and you guys are twins! What are the chances of that?”
Slim. Chris can’t even get over how ridiculously slim those chances are. He’s almost suspicious he’s on some kind of gameshow or something…
Series
- Part 1 of Blarren Humfer
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“Challenged Chris to what?”
“A snowman building contest.” Darren grins. “Two on two.”
“Us versus them?” Blaine’s voice has this forced aloofness to it, that makes Darren’s grin all the more devilish.
“Fuck that. It’s me and Chris against you and Kurt.”
It’s amazingly satisfying when Blaine drops his book.
Series
- Part 2 of Blarren Humfer
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He isn’t even going to ask where Darren found mistletoe in bulk.
“We probably could have tied bows on spinach and neither of them would have noticed,” Chris mumbles, frowning as he pulls the plastic bag open.
“Fuck that. First, I am way too lazy, and second… You really think Kurt wouldn’t know the difference?”
No. No, Chris doesn’t think that at all. Kurt is scarily good at recognizing things like that (and, so is Chris; the difference is that Chris doesn’t care).
Series
- Part 3 of Blarren Humfer
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It’s late, and Blaine can’t quite remember how they all ended up squeezed on the couch in front of the fire, but that’s where they are. Kurt’s asleep, leaning away from Blaine and onto Chris’s shoulder. Darren’s asleep, too, also sprawled unapologetically on Chris.
Series
- Part 4 of Blarren Humfer
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“Shut up, Chris,” Kurt bites, glaring at him. “There’s nothing wrong with not liking scary movies.”
“They’re just movies, Kurt,” Blaine assures, voice soft and encouraging, and Kurt swallows. “It’ll be over, and we’ll turn it off, and none of it will be real.”
It’s easy for Blaine to say, and that sounds logical, but this isn’t Kurt’s first attempt at overcoming his fear. His brain just doesn’t work that way. Horror movies make him paranoid, and he’ll probably have to spend the next night sleeping with his bedroom light on.
Series
- Part 5 of Blarren Humfer
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“I know this is probably really cliché,” Chris says, and he shifts in the way he does when he’s about to reveal something about himself. Darren perks up, scooting closer until his knee bumps against Chris’s thigh. “But I want to do that one day.” Chris nods towards the screen.
“Spend New Year’s Eve in Times Square?”
“Mmm. I’ll probably hate it, but… I’ve never really done any of the things people are supposed to do at midnight. I’ve always been content passing it at home, normally with Kurt, so I’ve never done the parties or the confetti or the getting hammered off my ass thing…” Chris pauses, shifts again. “Never kissed anyone at midnight.”
Series
- Part 6 of Blarren Humfer
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"You’ve never roasted marshmallows before?"
Series
- Part 7 of Blarren Humfer
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“I think we might have a problem,” he tells Kurt over the phone, frowning deeply and wishing Darren would stop singing so loudly in the shower.
“What do you mean?”
“It’s Darren, he’s acting… Really weird.”
Kurt makes a scoffing noise on the phone.
“What else is new?”
“No, like. Weirder than normal. He’s like… Really intensely happy?” Blaine pauses, waiting for Kurt to say something, but he doesn’t. “Do you think maybe he’s seeing someone?”
“…shit.”
Series
- Part 8 of Blarren Humfer
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“What is that?”
God fucking dammit.
He nearly chokes on his soda, swallowing it down as his eyes water. Chris turns to glare at Kurt, and conveniently also closes his hand over the underside of his jaw.
“A little warning next time, Kurt? I almost choked.”
“You have a hickey!”
Series
- Part 9 of Blarren Humfer