Is this how it is? Is this how it's always been?
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Samira stands on the precipices of things— of guilt and rage and euphoria and despair— lets them ebb and flow beneath her as she tries to keep her balance. She watches the edges carefully as they shift, follows along with their movements without ever taking her eyes off the abyss beneath her. Sometimes she feels more capable of looking away than others, but she still never does.
After Pitt Fest, she felt wrong for weeks. She never really feels “right,” but this was so much more potent than she was used to. She’d been giddy and energetic and enraged, and she’d found it absolutely horrifying.
OR
Samira is bipolar and undiagnosed. Pitt Fest triggers one of the worst episodes she's ever had.
Prequel fic to "Sometimes I wonder if I should be medicated," but can be read as standalone.
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Outside the door, the noises of the ED carry on. Monitors beep, non-slip sneakers squeak on the floors, and chatter floats down the halls. Suddenly, it’s all Samira can focus on, and it makes her feel insane.
She meets Abbot’s gaze, and she finds no humor in it. She starts pacing again before she breaks something.
“Your pupils are blown,” he says quietly.
For the first time in days, something akin to genuine fear breaks through the haze.
“I didn’t take anything.”
He nods slowly. “Okay, then let’s talk through the differential."
OR
bipolar samira with a side of mohabbot slow(ish) burn
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